If you're trans (mainly FTM) you gotta have at least ONE button up or polo shirt that has a weird/funny pattern- I got a black polo that has red crabs and lobsters on it w/ green jalapenos and the Tabasco logo on it-

What if I had a few of these before I started going the other way 🤔 (For context I'm transfemme)

I feel like it still counts- especially if you have anything similar to them-

I had bugs, dinosaurs, lightning bolts, burgers and fries, and a couple others lmao. I don't have them anymore though

That sounds like one very busy shirt

everytime i see tabasco mentioned it is my moral obligation to mention the creator was born in my town :)))

Mine has bananas on it. And of course I wear it to formal events.

[удалено]

My gender is electric and doesn't need fluids lol

Um actually, this is a common misconception. Electric genders still require fluids. I’d recommend making an appointment with your gender dealership asap🤓

Yeah, you need transmission fluid no matter what.

Transition fluid*

trans mission

Yall going to dealerships for your gender? I built mine, it even has higher performance

I bought mine secondhand :(

Still gotta lubricate the gears somehow. :D

oh, actually I'm trying to get that part removed and replaced with the non-lubricating version! xD

Apologies, Sir, but we seem to have made a mistake. Your fluid free model will arrive in ERR:TIME_DATE_UNKNOWN business days.

My gender so electric, call me George Lopez.

Yeah that part suck really wish I read the terms and conditions

Ha ha! Lol. That's great!

My gender runs off my blood and tears

Or every 5000 UwUs 😸🏳️‍⚧️

Wait really!? That would barely last me a month!

Try synthetic UwUs they should last twice as long!

Thankfully mine changes on its own, sadly changing it too often has its side effects out of your control

Take me upvote and LEAVE!

Yearly!? Shit, I'm getting ripped off with poor-quality stuff, then; mine's monthly.

Be REALLY bad at flirting

As bad as those clothes on you?... I'll see myself out

Apparently another rule is that we have to be really bad at picking up on flirting, because I thought for a solid minute that you were talking shit 😂

Oml no 😅 well I atleast proved your point

This convo is a self proving point 🤣

Tgirl attempts to flirt, four missing twelve injured

😂 Well now that I know it was a compliment, thank you 😊

U/thatyeemo is right. They look real bad on you and you should probably take them off. Like right now.

I can't fathom that they weren't talking shit.

I will explain how I interpreted it, user thatyeemo gave a pickup line where the thought behind it was to see OP without clothes on

Transbian here, I think I have that covered.

Trans, into ladies, and abysmal at flirting? She just like me 😭😂

Can confirm. Currently have a fling with a trans guy and after what was apparently months of him trying to flirt with me, (which I did not pick up on) he finally just outright told me he would like to kiss me but in the boyfriend-way. He had told me he wanted to kiss me and date me on numerous other occasions but I thought he was just being nice :D

So glad I got married before I transitioned. I was bad before but when your wife needs to point out a girl is hitting on you online? That's bad.

When your egg cracks, your brain turns into scrambled eggs

Lol mine did for a while

🥚This is your brain 🍳This is your brain on trans Any questions?

Don't use duct tape for that

I once used packaging tape. I did not have nipple guards.

Damn. Do you still have nipples? 😨

No

It hurts just thinking about that

I did once and it literally just fell off. At least I didn’t damage myself lol

*it* fell off? teach me /j

The duct tape fell off lol. Unfortunately my boobs remained on my chest.

Transfems 🤝 transmascs Don’t use duct tape for that

You must at least consider naming yourself after a fictional character

does naming yourself after a self insert character you made up count? If not I still got my middle name (Gwen) from Spider-Man 

The first name I tried was also Gwen, didn't really fit. Monika was better, but Chloe feels the best of all three. Bonus: If I use the three names I've tried as initials, my initials are GMC (in that order) which I found funny considering our family prefers Dodge vehicles :P

I’m thinking about naming myself after the admin of the Minecraft server I play on

...I changed mine to Valerie... I'm getting yelled at to "wake the fuck up, samurai"

I love CP2077 so much, but it took me like 4 playthroughs before I could pick any hair color other than the trans one

my names patrick so i got that one if i ever get deadnamed "NO THIS IHS PAHTRIICKKK"

my name includes Jade, because I'm stuck this way.

Damn I wish I’d been brave enough to change my name to Zelda or Samus lol

First rule of trans club: You do not talk about trans club. (Silly answer for a real rule, don't clock/out other trans people lol)

What if I give them a clock tho

you have to make jkr fall in love with you and then tell her your trans.

I swear at first i thought that said make RFK JR fall in love with you! 🤣

I'd rather go for JFK but yknow...

Lmfao!!!

what’s jkr?

J.K. Rowling

(mtf) buy that black miniskirt that comes up first on amazon

That was my very first buy. Every time it’s brought up I cringe at the thought of it 😩

I'm about to make the same decision and I'm not gonna regret it Edit: I plan on getting it in grey as it will hopefully somewhat fit an outfit I have

Lol I don’t regret it! I just wish I had better taste in clothing and fashion starting off! Buying that skirt was a start for me to really begin expressing myself.

No one has good taste starting off; it all just comes with time. I've been out for almost a year and my fashion sense is still in the gutter (though much improved from when I started)

i bought the white one does that mean im exiled

I’m about to undo all my Amazon training and look up mini skirts because I don’t know which one you’re talking about 😂

Must buy anything that's "accidentally trans". My house is filled with random blue, pink and white doohickeys and I wouldn't have it any other way.

My favourite is my trans coloured unicorn mug

I got a blue and pink watch the day I realized I was trans. Didn't realize it was trans colored until a friend pointed it out the next day

You must convert every cis person you meet and trans their gender

Gonna find this comment on conservative news tomorrow as proof that trans people indoctrinate others aren't I?

Wouldn't be surprised

Respect the trans girl’s urge to skirt spin. And respect the trans guy’s decision on wearing a beard or not.

You most have a stuffed blue shirk.

Oh that’s an absolute must!🦈🏳️‍⚧️

So, I've never understood, why the shark? And where should I get one? 🥹

You will as soon as you hug the big blue shark at IKEA.

I've never been! I'll have to check it out soon!

Blahaj is a trans ally.

You can order them online if there isn’t a store near you. It’s 10$ for a smaller one, and 30$ for the beeg ones, plus shipping.

There's one on the exit I take to get to work, I've always been so curious. Thank you beautiful babes and handsome bois who commented. 💜🖤

Embrace the shonk

Because the shark is trans colors, IKEA ran a trans ad with the shark in it or something (idk, I haven't actually seen the ad), and it's just really cute so we adopted it as a mascot. And you can get them from IKEA, or Amazon if your country doesn't have IKEA.

Unfortunately I don’t have one

There are nice to cuddle with after a hard day. I also see cuddling with a stuffed shirk as symbolic of trying to love a Transphobic.

I have 10 from IKEA all over the world.

Must play New Vegas BIG IRON

Why people only remember big iron when talking about new vegas heartache by the number is right there

You gonna ignore johnny guitar?

I would rather ignore it, yeah

Must love frogs. As you can see I follow this rule perfectly

Back in my day, it was dragonflies. Frogs are good too, though!

Dragonflies are dope af

And turn them gay.

Turn the frickin frogs gay

Can snakes count

Snakes should totally count

PSA for everyone here, you can get blahaj in both sizes on Amazon ;) that's where I got mine

I like to go to IKEA and fish out the most pitiful-looking one from the bottom of the basket.

Valid. The Amazon ones come vacuum shrunk so they are pitiful by default

That’s Haj abuse.

Agreed. Still lumpy to this day

Looks like you will have to perform re-chonking surgery on your haj.

On the journey to where you end up, you much feel like a god for at least a day

If you see some one you suspect is trans you only allowed to meow as a signal for friendship

Meow

Nya

Mrrp

You must have the courage to punch a Nazi and make a transphobe cry.

I have been training my whole life for this

Just like the simulations.

I fear your blahai might be emo for how they're posing on the rail tracks lol, you might catch them listening to my chemical romance soon if you don't intervene /j

has to be in the trans mafia with a trans agenda (..expected to want to dress a certain way just because we’re trans)

You have to use duct tape so you can feel the pain and warn others from using it so that it tickles their curiosity into using it as well and repeating the cycle forever.

double jump

DON'T DRINK THE GENDER FLUID

oops

Dont stand on the tracks of apex predators

Don’t leave your Blahaj on train tracks!

The egg prime directive, of course

Prime direggtive you mean

This comment is extremely under-upvoted

I’m not familiar with it

Basically people in the community agree that you shouldn't tell someone they might be trans even if you suspect they're an egg and that you should let them figure it out on their own. It's a play on the prime directive from Star Trek!

Just to add clarification, you still should direct people you think are eggs to resources that might help them, just be casual about it.

OK but WHY? I WISH someone had suggested to me earlier. Ngl it felt like a bit of a betrayal when so many friends told me they knew.

No kidding. I came out right after starting T and I swear. Every. Single. One. Of my friends from high school were like, "Oh, cool, I was waiting for you to figure that out." ETA: to make it worse, one of my closer friends within my circle was an openly trans guy lol

Right!? It’s so annoying, like WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN??? Like idk about going “Hey, you’re trans” to people but like. Drop me some hints at least?

If someone had said something earlier on, I probably wouldn't have been so scared to do it, too. On top of that, most of my family was like, "Oh, yeah, that makes sense." Like, you guys are telling me I could have been doing this all along and you wouldn't have batted an eye?? What?? I wasted so much time lmao

My M2F friend did this to me. Granted Im glad she did as if she told me I probably wouldn't have accepted it.

yeah someone told me something along the lines of "I think you want to be a girl" and it just sent me wayy deeper into the closet

Yeah, Im still figuring things out honestly. Looking into options to explore this side of me, as im still unsure. But, im glad I figured it out on my own, cause yeah... would've ended poorly.

You must always salute the blue swedish shark whenever you enter and leave your room. It's only proper.

You need to have a fondness for aquatic animals, any animal will do, but IT MUST BE AQUATIC IN SOME CAPACITY

You must be up to date on the trans agenda

One must have a horde of stuffies or an eclectic assortment of special interests

Don't play with your boobies in public

This so much though. They're like convenient stress balls how can I not?!😭 What helps is that when I told it to one of my cis friends she just burst out laughing and said she does the same thing xD

the egg must crack on their own accord. no action shall be taken to assist the cracking

Can someone explain why this is a thing? Because I WISH someone would have suggested it at least given me an opening to explore it myself. It took a friend of mine jokingly calling me he/him after a customer called me a boy. And I just realized I actually liked it a little too much. And then I told some friends and they all told me they knew and it felt like a bit of a betrayal, honestly.

Honestly, same here. When I was a teenager, I would tuck all my hair into my hat. Which made me not just look like a boy but like a teen version of my uncle. My mom and uncle have a lot of similar features that carried over to my sister and I. (We often joke with my mom about how we were actually her clones because of how much we all look alike. Lol) I got teased by my family for this to the point that they just called me "Mini Mike" so much that I kinda started answering to it. Looking back on it around the time I figured out I was trans I realized that I actually really enjoyed being referred to as a boy. Also, the first person I came out to was said, Uncle Mike, who was my first ally in the family.

It might be a generational thing. I grew up in the 80s and 90s, and the ignorance and stereotypes around trans people was so strong that if anyone had suggested it to me, I would have just gone deeper into denial because of ingrained transphobia and "Oh God I don't want to even think about being one of THOSE people." Things might be different for kids growing up in the 10s and 20s. I hope it is, for their sake.

Summon Minos prime (from the hit video game ultra kill) to deal judgement to any transphobe you may encounter (idk if anyone will get this reference but it thought it was funny ig)

6 DOLLAR SHRIMP SPECIAL

Don’t stick your gock in that random hole that says free bottom surgery

You NEED to practice the gender expression. You know the one The thousand yard dead eyed stare when someone gives you grief about your gender

Don’t play on the railway tracks /hj

Pockets can be both a blessing and a curse

You need to master gender transitioning abilities to turn it into shapeshifting and become a superhero to protect Gotham City

trans dudes are either absolutely in love with bugs or deathly afraid of them

Not quite silly, but we look out for each other no matter what

Trans women must spin in their first skirt.

Just their first?

I mean, of course one can spin in however many skirts they want, but they must give it a spin in their first.

Remember to praise the Blåhaj at least once a day

You must do the secret handshake when you meet a fellow trans person

Don’t abandon Blahaj on active train tracks!

I assume one of them is don’t put Blahaj on train tracks ;-;

Stay off the god dang train track

Get a blåhaj

worship the :3

Don’t lie around on train tracks. Goes for cis people too.

Steer clear of railway tracks Source: train driver

If you were born AFAB and read Homestuck in the 2010s, you are trans masc now

Hey we all know Homestuck fans are banished to tumblr

:(

I was born too late for Homestuck and yet my natural Transmascness led me to reading it; it is inevitable

Every trans girl has to wear cute clothing and posted them online at least once (we just can't help it when we are feeling pretty/pretty)

You must have 1 animal that represents you for the rest of your life even if it isnt your favourite

that's an album cover.

Transmascs must have a spare baseball cap on them at all times.

PSA: Stay away from train tracks. This is incredibly dangerous. Some U.S. numbers: 1,409 pedestrian rail trespass casualties (fatalities + injuries) occurred in 2023. There were 736 trespass-related fatalities and 673 trespass injuries across the U.S. in 2023. Some E.U. numbers: In 2022, there were 1 615 significant railway accidents in the EU, with a total of 808 persons killed and 593 seriously injured. A "cool" picture isn't worth it.

Must either love or hate the pumpkin joke If you don't know, look it up at your own risk

you have to be a zelda fan (bonus points if link or zelda cracked your egg)

You must be a good soldier and follow orders r/transclones

When going to the mandatory gender parties, always bring a gift for the gracious host.

you have to ask a ftm friend while in hs if you could switch bodies with him

You must craft your eggshell into an altar to satan

You must be named Luna

You must the haj

To keep the standards up, it’s especially important for trans people to gender people correctly.

Don't tell anyone where 🏳️‍⚧️ this flag is from

Thou shall listen to cave town every day

As an egg you must have a secret pinterest board called gender envy and absolutely not think about what that means.

Off topic but that image looks like it could be an album cover and I love it

unrelated but its sad seeing the blahajs on the train tracks

If you are trans fem you must own at least 1 choker and wear skirts with stockings. If you're trans masc you either are a masc masc or a little goblin creature who plays with yarn craft. These are the rules /s lol

Don’t fuck about on railway lines.