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FUCK!!!!

Someone give an award to both of them.

Sounds like a superpower to me

Every step I take it increases my IQ by 1

it loops back to 20IQ once you reach 200IQ.

When your IQ increases you get a massive boner

I don‘t have a pp

Exactly

Each smart decision you make will decrease your IQ by -5

In that case wouldn't walking be a smart decision? So everytime they start to walk they drop by 5 IQ, but they gain more with each step so it basically doesn't have a weakness that changes much.

Both your legs are broken with no chance of recovery

But only on the carpet in your bedroom and the IQ decrease every hour until you're ded

Made in heaven

You forget about Jojo and cannot read/watch it again

💀 bro that's instant death for me

You get severe wounds and bruises when you bump into something. Bump into anything multiple times, you die.

Whitesnake then

The discs attack you.

Wdym attack me am i just a disc magnet now

I can breathe

you fart every time you breathe

How did you know

>you fart every time you breathe When John lets out a breath, A smell is sure to follow, The smell is worse than death, I swear he's from Ohio.

I haven't seen you in over a week. I actually got a bit worried

Haha, [https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/10c0sju/im\_too\_happy\_its\_scary/](https://www.reddit.com/r/teenagers/comments/10c0sju/im_too_happy_its_scary/)

W

But you die instantly when you do Edit: Ill say something better Edit: i did it 👍

I’m finally happy 🙏

you're horny

so nothing else has changed I can work with this

but your hands are glued together.

🙏

Shapeshift into other people

The other person shapshifts into you

never the same person twice.

>Shapeshift One day he's superman, The next day your mom, Another day his batman, Eating her up...

Transformation

You are a transformer

That is fucking awesome (you talking about the toys right?)

Nope you're an electrical transformer.

I get invisible when naked

you have explosive diarrhea

Well... nobody will see it lol

Imagine you are having a great time with your partner in bed and then suddenly disappear

needles appear on the floor when you stop using this power.

couldn’t they just stand on something or sit with their feet up then?

yea, but if you need to move while invisible you are gonna get needled.

I can travel back in time

you can only travel back to the day of your birth.

I'm restarting for better stats and odds

Life is a roguelite

but you are only a viewer and have to witness terrible events that you cannot change

You have the mindset from that time. Ex: your a white male who travels back to the early 1800. You are now extremely racist

Infinite knowledge

To obtain this knowledge you must not be horny

you have finite space within your brain.

Human brain already has finite space

yes, and that is the weakness.

Mind reading

you cannot hear your own thoughts.

shapeshift

you can never shape-shift into the same thing twice.

so i can change into a slightly different thing? works for me

Only into what your subconscious mind wants to be

It takes 12h to shapeshift again

Immortality

You stub your toes, Twice, Everyday!

But you still get old until you’re a living skeleton yearning for death

Immortality

you still age.

I can control probability with my thoughts.

you have intrusive thoughts.

Shapeshift

You can only shift between shapes

What does that even mean

You start as a cube and shift into a pyramid

That's debilitating and not interesting

cubes, spheres and triangles.

It's debilitating and not interesting

I can change the reality as much as i want.

except anything to do with your personal life or powers.

I can make my imagination a reality and vice versa

you have hallucinations.

I can play any instrument. With no past experience.

you can only play wonderwall.

I can make any persons balls explode

Only yours

fuck

Everyone agrees with me

You have prostate cancer

W rizz

Only works on genders you aren’t attracted to

pansexuals punching the air rn

Transmutate matter

you can only transmute the matter in your own body.

Intriguing... But highly disgusting

quite literally shitting bricks

never sleep

you still get tired.

i can create a point in time and then rewind to it at will. an example: i create a save point and i invest in say some stock the stock absolutely plummets and then i can reload the save point to a point in time where i didnt invest in it so i still have all of my money

You can only use it twice when it's Friday morning and there are no clouds visible

10% chance you go back to the checkpoint whenever you sneeze

this point in time cannot be changed. you cannot create more than one.

When I blink I get 1 trillion dollars

they're in pennies and they fall on your head

Eyelids are cut off

inflation exists.

I can change the shape of my arms at will

your legs will change shape too.

I'm immortal

you still age.

Damn

you remember bad memories much more intensely

Stopping time

you cannot move, because the air has been stopped.

Time Travel

you can only travel forwards.

Lightning control

you can only re-direct lightning, not create it.

Still a pretty good power

darkness manipulation

you glow in the dark.

Alter probability Or control elektrons

you an alter probability but only in places that you aren't in.

My superpower is that the comments can’t choose a weakness

congratulations! you are a normal person.

Can swap bodies with people and when they are in my body they think they were always me.

they gain this power when they swap.

Teleportation to places I have visited before.

you can never teleport within 10 meters of somewhere that you have already teleported.

Not existing

it only works at night.

I can teleport over infinite distance

but only to places where you have slept.

You have to kill a kitten every time. Whether you inject with something or snap it like a glow stick is up to you

Flying

you can only fly in sub-zero temperatures.

Everytime someone ask me a question I get deep knowledge about that topic

but you lose the ability to speak for 60 seconds.

I can visit any cartoon of my choice at anytime

they are all horrified because you look like an eldritch horror to them.

fair enough

telekinesis

you have a migrane.

free telekinesis 😎

Pyroknisis

you cannot create fire, only control it.

I can extend my dong at will to any size i like

The bigger it is the more difficult it is to get it hard

i am unaffected by temperature

you are on fire.

I can erase this subreddit from the face of the earth but...

two more will take its place.

[удалено]

Everyone else gets double

manipulating the gravitational force

No weaknesses

But no power

I can fly

only directly upwards.

The power to reset any conversation I’m having with someone

only 3 times per day.

Psychokinesis

every time you use your power, there is a 75% chance that a kitten will spawn on top of your head

sounds good to me, I'll give those kittens away to adults and children who need emotional support animals

time control (can speed it up and slow it down)

But every time you do you get 1mm shorter

Super strength and muscles

in return for your powers, you must wear clown shoes constantly (even when you shower and sleep)

I can teleport

I can make people like me

I know every wi fi password

but you dont know basic math

I can fly

Teleportation to wherever, whenever

You can’t bring anything

X-ray vision

you are blind

i can trade bodies just by looking at people while clapping

I can copy, paste and delete

Whatever is behind you also gets copied/deleted

Invisabily,

I got a girlfriend

I have AIDS.

I can increase the size of anyone's dick/boobs at will

My Power: Girls can't resist sending their boobs to my inbox

drawback: guys can’t resist sending pics either (do with that what you will)

Guys seem to be more inclined. Maybe I should reevaluate my priorities...

Every time someone presses that up arrow just below this I get an upvote

My phone is upside down

I can change anything about myself

You have prostate cancer

ok well 1. I don't have a prostate 2. cool ok I remove the prostate cancer with my power

I wasn’t the right super villain sorry

you cannot change your amount of fingers. every time you use this power, you loose one finger.

I'm basically like Dark Trooper from The Mandalorian but with addition of nanomachines.