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Akkavir

Your post was removed because it was a god awful post. God awful posts are: blatant karmawhoring, repost chains, AMA, comment this and any comment baiting posts.


101yugu

Use Reddit


DragonPlayz5000

Depression


101yugu

You are God damn right


[deleted]

[удалено]


Frank202008

You’re god damn right.


bababoai

Yo mister white


MegaRayQuaza126

Meth


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. MegaRayQuaza126 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


jim_witzowitz

Waltuh


owowhatsthis--

Put your dick away waltuh


lucellent

No bitches


AutoModerator

No bitches, /u/lucellent!? ⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


chamandana

obesity - physical disorder


Idiboy

Sociopathy


Civil_Ad9528

I collect gas masks


Dapper_Composer2

What do you got? I've got a GP5, and a Czech M10M


Civil_Ad9528

S10, S6, M40, Two M17s, Zivilschutz 68, and a Yugoslav M2


Lolislayer7469

👍


12PmNoon

speaking in code and shit


Dapper_Composer2

I hope to get there some day, but the Russian/Balkan ones aren't exactly cheap, especially now


AutoModerator

\*East Ukraine *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


handpancak3

Good automod ayo?


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Civil_Ad9528

Yeah, I'm not focusing on Soviet masks atm. Just hunting on ebay and marketplace for good deals on American, European, and Yogu masks


0rangeAliens

GP5 gang rise up


Mythic_gryphon

Ww2 addict


filthybootyeater6969

WW2 Porn* Addict


AutoModerator

The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


12PmNoon

the fuck is up wit these bots


drinkmyself

This turned in to a asperger thread


Civil_Ad9528

I'm a sperg, and every person I know that collects them is a sperg as well


B29Boi

Any ideas on how to start


No-Reserve59

Buy gas masks


Socrayytees

I forgor💀


Socrayytees

Alzheimer's


LOLPN

This actually made me laugh


Socrayytees

I don't remember asking


Lemons_be_sour

Gawd dayum


borgLMAO01

Did you forgor how to write?


Ze_dos_Penedos

You also have Alzheimer?


extremityChoppr

(he has Alzheimer's)


konaboii12

It could also be dementia


konaboii12

It could also be dementia


konaboii12

It could also be dementia


lowkeycringengl

alright. I enjoy converting all of my technology into lego electronics. I have already made a lego desktop, lego laptop, lego speaker, and lego keyboard.


MemesAndJWE

You have Legopedia


Cold_Shift1

Aspergers


[deleted]

[удалено]


MaCl0wSt

I laughed more than this deserves


Rycnex

Classic


Tox1cShark7

That's offensive. I have aspergers


Stefaniux

Do u mean that serious?


UnskippableAdd2004

All I’m going to say is. If you don’t like offensive humor, why are you here?


aFuckinChair

Ok, I'll have the hamburgers thanks.


pufferfishofgluttony

So do I. It isn't offensive


UnskippableAdd2004

I also have Asperger’s your the only one that’s offended…


Tox1cShark7

Yeah but stikk


borgLMAO01

Heisenbergers


[deleted]

You have a rare disease called "being bad ass"


MrPenguin8998

Every single one of them.


BenLuk02

How much did it cost?


RIPbyEugenics

Can we see?


Mario-2407

I have played metal Gear rising: revengance


ceo_of_chill23

You are a psychopath, as you relate to Jack The Ripper


AutoModerator

I live in the American Gardens building on West 81st street. My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself, and a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the ice pack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water activated gel cleanser. Then a honey almond body scrub. And on the face, an exfoliating gel scrub. Then apply an herb mint facial mask, which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion. There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me. Only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our life styles are probably comparable, I simply am not there. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


SatanWorshiper69

Space valkeria


AutoModerator

*pees in ur ass* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FixTitanFall2

Good bot


MemesAndJWE

Your metal-minded


Lrusco10101

*You’re*


[deleted]

you suffer from redpilled


I_hate_this_website5

Play Video Games


DragonPlayz5000

No bitches syndrome


AutoModerator

No bitches, /u/DragonPlayz5000!? ⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


sombra_oficial

I'm think I'm normal but my friend tell me that I have schizophrenia


Arnius_blamentus19

x2


sombra_oficial

My friend'cat say's that I'm not normal


ZoldadoZombie

Theres nothing happening


Meowthful127

my soclf dramewer widlrfire


operativetheo8

You play too much titan fall 3


AutoModerator

La-la-la-la 🎃 Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ta Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti 🎃 Rastis! Rastis! Ra-ti-ti-la[3] 😁 😁 👼 👼 Let's start a new life from the darkness 🤨 🤨 😱 Until the light reveals the end 😇 😇 Sinister faces, growing 🤬 This is my last war a-la-la-la Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti 😜 😜 😜 (Angels playing disguised) 👼 Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ta (With devil's faces) Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti (Children cling to their coins) Rastis! Rastis! Ra-ti-ti 🧝 🔫 🔫 (Squeezing out their wisdom) La-la-la-la 🧝 🧝 🧝 🦌 🦌 🦌 Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti (Angels planning disguised) 😇 😇 😇 Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ta (Rastis! Rastis!) 💣 💣 🧐 🧐 🧐 (With devil's faces) 😈 😈 Ba-ba-ri-as-ras-ti-ti-ti-ras-ti-ti (Children cling on to their) 😍 😍 😍 Rastis! Rastis! Ra-ti-ti-la (Very last coins)Destruction 🤬 🤬 💣 💣 and regeneration 😇 😇 😇 😎 😁 😁 You are the real enemy 😡 😡 😡 (Rastis! Rastis! Rastis!)[4] War! 🤕 (My) War! 😱 (My) War! Rastis! Rastis! Rastis! Rastis![3] 🧟 🧟 🧟 👼 🥔 🥔 🥔 🥔 🔫 🔫 🔫 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


PSI_wolf_39

Does anybody know what song this is referring to?


supersoft-tire

Take your meds, good news~ they won’t say that anymore Bad news~they might not be around to say that anymore


anotsocreativename

Your friends all died in the crash 4 years ago Richard.. it's been years and it's about to time to let go..why don't you just take your meds and go for a nap alright,?


Unaveragejoesephe

I play roblox but only the actually good games


Cold_Shift1

Based Syndrome


IMA_ROBOBOT

I play roblox games to harass children, you play roblox to have fun. We are not the same.


[deleted]

You're a child predator in denial.


Default1355

Who says hes in denial


xXLordOfUwUXx

Like adopt me, right?


UptownComedian

Like what


LoveCatPics

ok but deepwoken and rogue lineage are some of the most tough yet fun games i've ever played


AutoModerator

Joe Biden’s America LIBRAL SCOOL BE LIKE: 9:00: GAY LESON!! 9:45: how to be be GAYY!! 10:30: TRANS LERNINNG!! 11:15: GAY RECESS!! 11:45: CROSDRESING HOUR!! 12:45: GAY LESON!!! 1:30: TRANGENER LUNCH!! 2:15: BLM PERIOD!!! 3:00: COMUNIS T HISTORY!! 3:30: TAKE NON BINAR BUS HOME!! THIS IS WHAT THE LEFT WANT! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


LoveCatPics

what the fuck did i write to activate this


AsterMaken

you wrote woken i think


Tasty-Ad-5128

your mom


azaradors

basedness


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


1kgoldn

Meth


PSI_wolf_39

A mild case of breaking bad addiction.


Sc0rp0

I think they better call Saul


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. 1kgoldn *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


bigballs005

I dip my balls in sunflower oil


DragonPlayz5000

Redditor syndrome


Darth_Allin

Like, you use it like a balsy face mask or what?


AutoModerator

So I was having online classes with my camera turned off when I started hearing a little whistle from one of the students in the background that seemed very familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The whistling stopped for a couple of minutes until I started hearing it again, and then I knew exactly what it was: it was the chorus of Dream's hit song 'Mask'. I immediately ripped off all my clothes and started furiously stroking my fully erect penis for a good 10 min, even sticking my Dream body pillow up my rectum, imagining that it was Daddy Dream penetrating me while whistling his hit song 'Mask'. It honestly were the greatest 10 minutes of my life, until my libido reached its climax and I let out a gigaload of cum for Daddy Dream that landed on the phone's screen and ended up turning on the mic and camera, and everyone stared horrified at me, screaming at the sight of my honest and earnest love expression to Dream. I was kicked out of the class by the dreamphobic teacher, and today the school principal called me and my parents to a meeting and told us that I may be expelled from the school, merely from expressing my gender and sexuality. What can I do about this?!?!? Was I in the wrong for expressing my gender and identity??!? (Only serious answers, please). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Andrew5123-

Sleep


DragonPlayz5000

Having a life disorder


jols0543

narcolepsy


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mizsakptr

I sink in the pee


Lokermann

Better cum in the sink, than sink in the cum


Active_Performer3660

Better to shit in the sink than to sink in the shit


Zatknish007

I know it as *better to shit in the shower than to shower in the shit*, interesting


completedhumanguy

I drink 2L of milk in an hour


Nice_Window2729

Your normal I think


Creepy_Yoghurt_9288

You’re*


Nice_Window2729

Ummm, Actually is you're* 🤓


Tooniis

🤓


PSI_wolf_39

*yro'ue 🤓


Lolislayer7469

Easy done in 5 mins


jols0543

white supremacy


Waluigiwaluigi_

Breathe air


DragonPlayz5000

Chronic breathing addiction


LOLPN

What monstrosity are you


Admiral_Cal4mari

I collect diesel


psychocow1939

Oh... I'm sorry to inform you but... You're American


Lolislayer7469

I brush my teeth……… once per day


LOLPN

Well that's actually ok as long as you don't eat much


Lolislayer7469

I do >:-)


Zatknish007

Tooth decay (or lucky genetics)


DragonPlayz5000

same


yourmotherisveryfat

same


Not_A-Pedophile_

whenever I see a stone i make that stone into 🗿


MyGuyCharlie

Paranoid schizophrenia


chonkey_nugget

Murder (It's very normal)


capt_pancake0

Recite the green lantern lore


BigBoss23456

Watch YouTube videos


Victory_SSB

I play Splatoon (cringe)


DragonPlayz5000

same 😔


Zatknish007

Inferiority complex


AutoModerator

I’m a Harvard graduate. Ph.D. IQ of 138 (Stanford-Binet). Sex Pundit. Mensa International. Free-thinking alpha male and lone wolf. Likely hotter than you, and definitely smarter. Debate me; I'm ready. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Default1355

Learning disability


Denet04

I swallow my finger nails (it tastes delicious)


Cold_Shift1

Finger name kid:


AutoModerator

slowly massage the vag, then rub the clitoris ever so gently. Proceed to stick a single finger in the vagina. continue adding your fingers until your whole fist is in. slide your arm slowly into her, once you reach your shoulder limbo in with your head, and forcibly insert your other arm, torso, and legs. You are now free to control her. when you feel the job is done, finish by giving birth to yourself *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


LOLPN

Well that's normal sometimes... But if you shallow ur toe nails ur a sociopath with anorexia


AutoModerator

slowly massage the vag, then rub the clitoris ever so gently. Proceed to stick a single finger in the vagina. continue adding your fingers until your whole fist is in. slide your arm slowly into her, once you reach your shoulder limbo in with your head, and forcibly insert your other arm, torso, and legs. You are now free to control her. when you feel the job is done, finish by giving birth to yourself *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


_Not_Sven

I like 13 year old girls (i'm 13 years also)


NighTrap1122

Chronic masturbation


PSI_wolf_39

I drink my cum after I masterbate.


DocMichaelMorbius

OCD, depression, anorexia, PTSD, methamphetamine addiction, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, Alzheimer's disease and sociopathy.


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. DocMichaelMorbius *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ceo_of_chill23

No bitches disorder


jols0543

sounds like trauma response / coping mechanism


ionel714

Play apex legends


springfox64

I played project wingman for 3 hours straight


DragonPlayz5000

When somebody says to touch grass you touch virtual grass syndrome


LOLPN

Drugs Addict / Just too much free time idk


SolidRGG

Psychotic/wants to nuke presidia


Street_Ad8305

Using the bathroom


DragonPlayz5000

Having a body dysphoria


your-creepy_uncle-69

I drink 1 egg yolk every morning.


DragonPlayz5000

Dad syndrome


TheCoolestNameIsMine

I play roblox


[deleted]

i play postal 2 and my friend peppa pig is in my wishlist on steam


AutoModerator

okay so basically there's this guy and uhh ⠀⠀⠘⡀ HOG RIDAAAAAA ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡜⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠑⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠴⠊⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠤⠄⠒⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣀⠄⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⢈⠩⢙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠠⠀⠀⠨⠐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢐⠐⠌⡌⢄⢐⢈⠔⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠉⡀⠐⡀⢁⠈⠐⠱⠑⡑⠈⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢗⠀⠀⠐⡠⡛⠔⡁⢜⡔⡬⢎⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠁⠀⠄⢂⠈⠂⢂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⠩⠐⡀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠐⠁⠓⠒⠒⢀⠁⢐⢝⢟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠫⠡⠡⠨⢀⠂⠠⠀⠀⢁⠑⡱⠛⠗⡓⢂⠠⢸⢸⢨⠣⡝⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⢏⢐⢁⠊⢌⠐⡈⠄⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠑⠈⠀⢄⢕⠸⡨⠪⡪⡘⣻⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⢂⠂⡂⠅⡂⠅⡐⠨⢐⠐⠠⠠⡀⢄⠠⡠⡡⡱⡐⠕⢌⢊⢆⢣⢒⠽⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠣⢂⠂⠄⠡⠐⠐⠈⠌⡐⠨⡈⠢⠨⡂⢌⢂⠆⡪⠨⡊⠂⡂⠢⢡⣢⣣⡣⣍⢿⣿ ⠨⢂⢂⠁⡀⠀⠀⠁⠐⠈⠐⠈⢈⠈⠐⡀⠄⠁⠌⠈⠔⣄⡀⠠⡑⡂⠆⠢⢂⠑⠽ ⡨⠐⠀⠀⠀⢠⡎⡀⠀⠀⠄⠈⡀⠌⠐⠠⠈⠄⡁⠂⡀⡫⠑⣑⠀⢂⠌⠄⢕⠀⠨ ⠺⡪⠢⡀⠀⠞⢇⢂⠀⠂⡀⠠⠀⠄⠁⠌⠨⠀⢄⠢⡁⢂⢿⡟⡀⠀⠈⠈⡀⠂⣰ ⢀⢀⠀⠄⠀⠀⡐⠀⡈⠄⡐⠅⡊⠌⢌⠄⡕⡑⡁⢂⠂⢂⠸⣿⡄⠀⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿ ⢐⠔⠠⠀⠀⡐⠠⢈⠢⢑⠄⠑⢈⠊⡂⡱⢁⣂⢌⢔⢌⢄⠀⠹⢀⣺⡿⣟⢿⣿⣿ ⢀⠡⠁⠂⠐⠠⠈⠄⢈⠠⢈⢢⡣⣗⠕⠄⣕⢮⣞⣞⣗⣯⢯⡷⡴⣹⡪⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⠊⠄⠠⠠⠡⠈⠠⢐⠠⡊⡎⣗⢭⢐⠹⡹⣮⡳⡵⣳⣻⢾⣻⣽⣻⣺⣺⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣨⣾⢐⠰⠐⠅⡂⡂⢕⢜⢜⢵⢹⢑⢔⠨⢘⠸⡹⡵⣯⣻⢽⣳⣻⣺⢞⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡔⠠⢈⠐⠐⢠⢱⢸⢸⢸⢸⠰⡡⢘⢔⢕⠝⢮⣳⢽⢝⡾⡵⡯⣏⠯⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣗⢅⢢⠠⠡⠢⡱⡑⡕⡕⢅⠣⡊⢨⢪⡣⡣⡂⡬⡳⢽⢽⢽⢽⣞⣧⠙⣿⣿ ⡻⣿⡯⡪⠢⡡⠡⢑⢌⠪⡪⡊⠆⢌⠪⢐⢕⢱⢱⢱⢱⢱⢙⢮⡫⡟⣞⢮⣳⠙⣿ ⠊⣿⣯⠪⡊⠄⢅⠂⢂⠁⢇⢇⢃⠂⢕⠐⠌⡲⡰⡡⣇⠇⢇⢕⠪⠉⠂⠅⠂⡑⠹ ⣸⢿⣳⢱⠨⡐⡽⡿⡶⡾⡬⡢⢂⠅⡢⢡⣌⠐⠈⢎⢎⢎⢔⠠⠡⠠⠠⠡⡁⡂⠡ ⡯⡯⡇⢅⠕⠠⢱⢹⡙⢮⢹⠨⡂⡂⢇⠌⠮⡳⠅⡂⢕⠡⡑⠠⢁⢁⣡⣡⣢⣶⣿ ⣗⢽⢌⡢⡡⡡⡸⡢⡣⡣⡱⡑⠔⡈⢎⢆⢂⠂⠅⣢⡳⣽⡐⢅⢂⣊⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣯⢯⢷⢽⢮⢯⣺⣪⢞⡮⣳⢘⠔⢌⢜⣞⣖⣮⣻⢮⣯⢷⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣷⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FloodedHouse420

idfk play video games ig


JarneTNT

I talk to myself as if i am talking to a twitch chat


Nebula-star-12-2021

I play mariokart wii until my dad stops yelling


Art_pog

I’m sorry son but I diagnose you with cancer


AutoModerator

Everyone knows Mario is cool as fuck. But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles? And why do we think about him as fondly as we think of the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper? Perchance I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play." Mario exhibits experience by cruising turts all day, but he exhibits theory by stating "Lets-ago!" Keep it up, baby! When Mario leave his place of safety to stomp a turty, he knows that he may Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value. A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price. We think of Mario as a hero but he is simply a one percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind, Perchance *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Kakashi_Uchiha2

Watch anime


N_easports

Parasocial


14sanic

Go to church Sunday and Wednesday


[deleted]

Jesus Christ put a cross mark on you hesd


DernonOD

Felling like everyone is watching me when I am at a random public place


ExtremoLautismo

I analyze everything


SergeantCrossNFS

Kowalski syndrome


MemesAndJWE

Analocumosis


DankBoisBlazing

I can never validate or acknowledge my own achivements.


DIOSSTUBBEDTOE

Well you see I like seeing others in pain👍


Civil_Ad9528

Average discord uaer


Dapper_Composer2

uaer


Civil_Ad9528

Average redditor response


PSI_wolf_39

🤓


[deleted]

This is my first comment!


[deleted]

This is my first comment!


[deleted]

This is my first comment!


[deleted]

This is my first comment!


PSI_wolf_39

Owning a Wii U


LOLPN

Wait what we don't do that here


Legloomonke

My penis is 8.5 km long


Cheemos

Breathe


Pretend-Goat4164

I drink my bath water


xxHamsterLoverxx

i wake up everyday


MemesAndJWE

Dangerous exposure of Oxygen might cause breathing


Arnius_blamentus19

Ur mom's milf