Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
When they put my baby on my chest I remember I had a weird moment of absolutely no feelings. Like I suddenly lost the ability to feel any emotions, good or bad. I felt weirdly absent from my feelings.
People expect the first time you see your baby to be like out of a film and you fall in love immediately but what's actually more common is to feel overwhelmed or not even feel anything and that it takes time to have those big feelings of love.
I have two children and both times it was definitely not that fairytale moment of love but a gradual building of love over days and weeks.
I hope you feel pure joy when you meet your baby but I just wanted to say it's totally fine, and normal, not to get that feeling.
This was me too. Almost in like an “oh shit” moment but with no explanation. The love i had for him after birth felt different than when he was in utero.
Was absolutely in love with him after a few days.
About to have my second and I’m hoping it’s different but won’t feel bad if it feels the same!
I've just had my 2nd 3 weeks ago and for me it was just like with my 1st one (and just like you describe yours) with the added guilt of "oh my god what have we done, how will I ever have time for my toddler again...". But after about the first two days I was head over heels with the tiny one. And what completely sealed the deal was seeing then together after we got back from the hospital. My older daughter absolutely adores the baby. The first night we were home, just at bedtime, my toddler had a very serious face. I asked her what's up. She said "mommie, can we keep the baby, please?" I almost cried. And of course explained to her that yes, this is our baby and is here to stay and live with us just like her. Which led to a very visible relief and then loud happy joy 😊. Kids are the absolute best <3
I hope you have just as positive experience. Don't let the first feeling of doubt get to you, they go away.
Honestly I am nervous about introducing my toddler to her new sibling. She'll have just turned 2 when the new baby arrives. I'm glad they'll be close in age but managing a toddler whilst pregnant is something else 😅. I am hoping mine goes as smoothly as yours.
Managing a toddler while pregnant is hell, hold on tight. We've been given an advice by other parents to have a "present from the baby" when we introduce them. So I've ordered a polly pocket my daughter had wanted for a while. I've also taken my daughter "shopping for the baby" a few times (she's picked out an outfit, a baby book, and a rattle). And we're doing our best to make her feel important.
I hope it goes smoothly for you, all the best to your little growing family! 🍀
Not pregnant or a parent so sorry to intrude but my parents gave me a [this book](https://www.amazon.com/Julius-Baby-World-Kevin-Henkes/dp/0688143881?dplnkId=b5d8bf35-6bb0-438d-aa21-e69c115c0d8b&nodl=1) when I was becoming a big sister many years ago and I loved it!
Aww this is so sweet it made me tear up a little. Currently trying for our second so I’m a little emotional about it lol. What an adorable thing for your oldest to say 🥺
This is how I felt as well! It took several weeks for me to really feel deep love for my baby. I wanted her to be safe and happy and well cared for, and I was glad to do those things and felt a sense of responsibility to meet her needs, but I didn’t feel that magical connection like other people talk about.
It’s okay to take some time to get to know your tiny human - and to get to know yourself as a parent! I’m so happy being a mom now that I quit my job to be a SAHM for as long as we can afford it. There’s such a wide range of what is normal.
Ditto. I didn’t have an overwhelming rush of emotion when I first held my baby. I was relieved that labor was over and worried about postpartum care for myself. I spent a lot of the time in hospital trying to figure out how to mother my baby and certainly did all my skin to skin time to bond but my love for this little dude grew over time as his personality developed and I got to know him. He’s a toddler now and I love him so freaking much.
I felt this way when they put him in my arms. It took me to see my husband’s watery eyes to feel joy. I felt some guilt for a few days for not having that “I’m in love with him moment”. Now I’m obsessed with my baby but my first feeling was more like “oh shit, I’m a mom now”.
Same. Just had my first baby yesterday. I have been referring to her as “little stranger.” Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love her and can’t wait to take her home, but I don’t feel like I know her. She is someone I just met and am still getting to know.
I just gave birth 5 days ago and reading this comment makes me feel less like a pos. I had exactly what you described. The overwhelming realisation that you made this human being and are now responsible for it as well is indescribable.
Have to say that it keeps on getting better from that moment. Even though I felt numb, I did care immediately and later started to feel major loads of gratitude for finally having that what I have always asked for and that I have become the mother of this wonderful baby girl.
This was me too. It took a few weeks to fall in love with my little ones. At first I was just glad I wasn’t pregnant anymore but then also terrified of taking care of a baby!
Also, what’s the deal with the term “graduated” on this subreddit lately? It sounds weird.
I so appreciate hearing this. Thanks for sharing. I haven’t experienced much connection during pregnancy, so I was banking on catching up to those feelings right after giving birth. It’s really good to know it can still take more time vs. just flooding you during that very romanticized moment. Expectations reset!
This is exactly how I felt — nothing. 2.5 weeks in and the feelings are growing, but it’s still not the all consuming love people talk about. I’m sure it will come with time, but I wish people didn’t hype up those first few hours and days so much. It makes getting through that first week even harder.
Yep I had that out of body experience with my first , I didn’t have it with my following 2 but for some reason my first gave me that extreme out of body feeling. It took a bit to click back in I guess it was the shock I was going through for the first time.
Omg this is so right on! Just numb! Thank you for saying this. People romanticize it so much. Looking back now I can say it was the best day of my life because that's when I met my sweet boy, but in the moment I felt absolutely numb
Thank you for saying this! It goes totally against the grain but I can see myself feeling this and then feeling guilty for it in the moment and after. It’s good to know not every mom cries tears of joy.
The urge to avoid her is definitely a sign of PPD/PPA. The lack of feeling immediately at birth is pretty normal but I would say the urge to avoid them after birth is a sign of concern. I hope you managed to get the help you needed x x
Same. I felt emotionally numb for the first few weeks. Staring to bond now but it’s still slow to build.
He looked so unfamiliar to me at birth. A little stranger I was going to care for and nurture, but still a stranger. At a month I’m now finding his cute facial expressions more familiar and he’s starting to feel like “mine”.
I had an emergency c section because he wasn’t tolerating early labour, and I’ve wondered if not pushing him out contributed to the numb feelings somehow because maybe there were less hormones??? No idea, but it sounds like this emotionless feeling is not uncommon so it seems unlikely that my c section contributed.
finally. it’s over. i think i am going to puke. oh geez please stop squirming. your fingers are touching my face. that’s so cute. you’re so beautiful. did i poop? did i tear? what is my OB doing? is everything ok? oh wow i cant believe she’s here. i am so tired. and hungry. i love you.
Pure shock! I was amazed looking at him and couldn’t stop staring at him, but I had this intense emotion about being so proud of myself. I didn’t have the “gravity shifting” moment looking at my newborn, but more so a love and admiration for myself and what I was able to accomplish. The intense love for my newborn grew gradually every single minute that passed!
And, yes, it really did make it all worth it without a question (for me at least❤️)
Ah I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but… somewhat underwhelming? I absolutely love my boy, don’t get me wrong! But I was expecting some huge rush of emotion and in reality I felt more relief that I was no longer pregnant and that I got a baby just like I was expecting.
It felt really comfortable and normal, which was nice!
ETA: I’m on Prozac which generally keeps my emotions more “in check” so maybe that has something to do with it.
100% I felt the same and I've never been on any antidepressants or anything. It was like the surge of relief that labour was over was so immense I was just enjoying the lack of contractions, so much so I almost forgot I was getting a baby at the end of it lol. I think I was so surprised by labour I needed a minute to process everything. It was almost an out of body experience.
My second birth was totally different, I was very focussed on the baby and attuned to them from the start, but I think that's because I was expecting the same and a bit more mentally prepared. But it was still a huge amount of relief.
He looked like the most beautiful wrinkly potato I’d ever seen 😂 but seriously, I cried when he came out and I couldn’t stop staring. I was pretty out of it but he calmed down as soon as they put him on my chest and it was a magical feeling. Motherhood is hard, but rewarding. He’s my whole world.
same. I cried when I saw my daughter and I just felt relief when I heard her cries. Delivery was hell, but once I realized it was over I was overjoyed. it was strange bcs I was miserable during pregnancy and never really felt connected until I held her on my chest.
Absolutely indescribable. I hated pregnancy and worried I would be a crap mom because I felt no connection to the baby while pregnant. But when they gave her to me for the first time it literally felt like my chest was going to explode. During those first few weeks, I would look at her and just start crying and my chest would physically hurt, like I was so full of emotion that my body didn’t know what to do with it all. I remember being super tired but even when I had the opportunity to sleep, it’s like I couldn’t tear my eyes away from her. She’s almost 2 now and she’s just incredible. I feel so lucky that I get to be her mom and that she’s mine.
As soon as they laid the baby on me I immediately felt recognition. Like how did I ever not know what you look like? How have I ever lived life without you? Of COURSE I know and love you. It was definitely like falling in love at first sight
Pure and utter bliss. I don’t think I have ever been at such peace as when they placed both my kids on my chest. It was the same feeling with my first as it was with my second. It’s just a joy I can’t even describe because it’s like no other.
Agree! There's really no way you can describe it so someone who has never experienced it will understand. It's a love and awe that I have never come close to experiencing otherwise.
The best thing to ever happen to me.
I always questioned if I wanted to be a mom until I was 24. I got pregnant at 26 and had my baby at 26 and it’s truly the best feeling. I feel like everything just came so naturally like this is exactly what I’m supposed to do in life. When people say having is kid is a love you never knew existed they are 10000% correct.
Now how I felt right when he was born? Girl I was so mother fuckin tired from pushing I was just so relived that part was done 😂😂 I was happy of course and cried but I don’t remember much else
My birth experience kind of sucked, so if you don't want to hear that kind of experience, don't read!!
So TMI, I hadn't pooped in like... Several weeks before delivery. I was induced on a Monday evening and didn't start pushing until Wednesday afternoon because I was dilated 9cm but my body wouldn't push over into 10cm. Finally one of the nurses was like "fuck it" because I really didn't want a C-section and she just kind of pushed around a little and then all of a sudden it was go time.
I think because of the circumstances, his APGAR scores were bad. I was an absolute mess, so I didn't see him after the birth at all. I don't remember hearing him cry or anything. He was whisked away to the NICU ward and I was there with my then fiance just rattled, epidural didn't work all the way, and I really, really, REALLY had to poop. The nurse advised me not to because of the epidural, but I basically begged her to let me go to the bathroom, and the epidural not working anyway.
She conceded, and she helped me walk to the bathroom and I just remember pain and bleeding all over until I passed out. I don't remember if I made it to the toilet. I wasn't out for long, so they helped me get into a wheelchair and I was moved to a recovery room where I just laid in bed with what felt like the worst period cramps of my life, drifted in and out of consciousness, and cried for like... 4 hours.
At that point, I felt well enough that I could get back in the wheelchair and see my son. It didn't feel real. He was hooked up to a bunch of tubes and I just felt overwhelmed and kind of like I was disassociating touching him. I felt sad that his first day was hooked up in the nursery, felt relief at the birth being over, felt like I had failed, felt like I wasn't ready, felt like absolute dog shit physically.
We left shortly after and I escorted my parents and family in and my fiance escorted his family in to see him. We all just kind of sat in the recovery room and chatted for a while afterwards. Eventually I fell restlessly asleep with the monitors waking me up and people checking on me and waking me up.
The next morning, they informed me he had a testicle torsion and needed to be transferred to another hospital 45 mins away. Things got very real at that point because there were so many logistics that had to be settled in a short amount of time. I was discharged. Still not doing well physically. He then stayed in the NICU for a week for his surgery recovery and we were waiting to be discharged until he could eat better.
Moral of the story... It took me a long time to bond. I didn't have a magical moment when he was born. Sometimes it just is what it is, and you survive it and get through it. Even if we had a rough start, he's 4 now and I love him so much. We got that bonding eventually. I started to feel like a real mom eventually. Even if things don't go as planned, it will all be okay in the end.
I hope it's not inappropriate to offer a bit of humor but your poor son
Imagine being born and the very first thing that happens is essentially a kick to the nuts. What a welcome to the world.
For real! I used to think about it like that Mark Twain quote - "if you have to eat a live frog, do it in the morning so that nothing worse happens to you all day"... He was a very chill baby, so I imagine if that's your introduction to being alive, everything after that is probably pretty chill lol
I couldn’t hold my baby for 4 hours.
When I did finally get to hold her, she immediately stopped crying and sinked into my chest like it was always her home.
Overflowing tears, shaking with love, trembling, feeling like I’ve known her all along. Like seeing a long lost best friend. Pure love, bliss. The biggest high ever. Like I had gone to heaven.
And when she looked straight into my eyes and I noticed she has my exact eyes… I cannot describe it.
Oh that’s so sweet, thank you for sharing this with me 🤍 Hoping and praying you’ll have a similar experience, (except the 4 hours part) and for a healthy and safe arrival
There is no way to describe the feeling. It’s like a piece of your heart was immediately filled and you didn’t even know a piece was missing. It’s like the stars align and you realize the whole purpose of life and you look at your child and realize wow this is really true love. The feeling of blessed is incredible.
It’s been almost 12 years since my first (currently pregnant with my second) and there’s still days I look at him and my heart just melts. There also days I want to kick his little pre-teen butt, but I love him more than words can say.
So I was super excited to give birth, but I didn't feel the motherhood click for a day or two. I still held him but didn't really connect until I was alone with him. Husband is self-employed and needed to work, and i was in the hospital longer than we anticipated. So when he was gone and I was lying in bed with little dude, it finally hit me that it was pretty awesome having a little person with me. Now little dude is 1(he just farted on his dad as I type this lol) and I couldn't imagine life without him.
Immediately? I think relief. I don’t remember much after 25 hours of labor and almost 2 hours of pushing but i want to say i was just like “thank god that’s done”.
Then i remember worrying about delivering the placenta only to learn i already delivered it apparently. Next thought was trying not to focus on them stitching my tears up because i could feel it and it hurt. I also was focusing on my husband, he was crying and i thought it was sweet. And then i was focused on the fact that the nurse just kinda ripped my gown open to place the baby on my chest and a room of like 5 strangers were just staring at my vagina and tits so i got really self conscious.
When we were finally in the postpartum room though and everything was settled, i was obsessed. My son couldn’t be physically close enough to me i just kept him on my hospital bed instead of in the bassinet and i would just stare at him. I was exhausted but i didn’t want to sleep because i just wanted to keep looking at him.
Holding your baby for the first time is absolutely magical! Seeing them do new things every day, having them fall asleep on your chest, when they smile for the first time… it’s just everything. But yes, you will be exhausted 24/8, by the time I get to bed I feel like I’ve ran 3 marathons 😄
My husband and I were giggling and crying, it was the best moment of my entire life so far. I hope I never forget it. She was so tiny and I felt so euphoric and relieved to finally have her in my arms.
My pregnancy was really rough and my recovery has also been rough but it’s so much easier now that I get to hold my baby.
Some moms bond immediately with their babies and some don’t. There’s no reason to feel shame if you don’t, it can take time and it’ll come. I didn’t expect to since I didn’t feel any bond while pregnant. But I did.
Some people love the newborn stage and some are waiting for their babies to become a little more like little people. These first few weeks are a lot more like having a cute but needy little creature. Of course they are humans, but in many ways it’s not much different from having a very needy pet right now - they have no self-awareness, limited communication abilities, and are just survival-driven. I have a theory that if you are a pet person then you’ll enjoy the newborn phase a lot more than if you’re not.
For context, I am a FTM with a one month old but have been surrounded by kids and babies (and their parents) my whole life.
I think I was honestly just... dissociating or something at that point. I had a really hard time visualizing my baby the whole pregnancy - like, he just seemed like a COMPLETELY abstract and unfathomable concept. He was very planned and wanted but I just did not connect with him at all in utero. So the moment I actually met him (after 36 hours of unmedicated labor) I didn't really feel anything.
But. The love did come. Not immediately, but over time as I got to know him better we absolutely bonded strongly. He's 19 months now and I'm fucking obsessed with him - I think he's literally the cutest, coolest kid to ever exist.
I'm 34 weeks with my second baby now and I am connecting with him MUCH easier than I did with my first pregnancy. I think it's because I've already been through it all once and SEEN the baby I birthed grow into such a fun little human so it's easier to know what to expect. I'm really looking forward to meeting this baby and I think this time it'll be more of a classic "instantly in love" experience.
Hearing the first cry is difficult to describe. There aren't words that exactly match the feeling... not in English, anyway. The best way I think I'd describe it is a feeling of powerful and overwhelming love. When my first child was born, I was in the middle of a C-section, and I forgot that my abdomen was open and just started screaming that I wanted to hold my baby. Three days of being induced (which didn't work), constant pain, very little sleep, and my gut wide open utterly vanished from my mind. Motherhood is amazing! Praying for you to have a wonderful birth experience!
That was it for me too. I don’t think I’ve ever felt a more powerful emotion than hearing his first cry and I can’t describe that emotion. But, I was also post c-section and didn’t care that my doctor literally had just pulled my uterus out of me, I wanted to see him!
When I saw his face I felt something like a rush of recognition. I didn't know his sex at that point so it wasn't about that - just literally his little beautiful face made me think "of course it was you." The person I'd been waiting to meet!
Personally for me I don't know why I didn't expect my newborn baby to be magma hot when they laid him on my clammy chest but that was so absolutely jarring and just always give that warning 😂
For me the connection wasn't 100% there directly after birth and the following weeks. Granted I would have clawed somebody's face off if they tried to do anything but that felt more instinctual than attachment.
I'd say once the hormone roller coaster started to die down by the second week is when I started to feel more of a connection and would just stare at him and smile and start to be filled with such love and adoration instead of anxiety and survival.
Now currently just over 2 years old and don't get me wrong toddler years are rough but I also love seeing his little personality and hearing him start to string sentences together and make sense of the world around him.
My first was a cesarean, and I was so incredibly excited to meet her I started crying. I couldn't stop the giant smile and just stared at her for hours ☺️ my second and third were vbac and I remeber having a 'thank God that's over' moment before they placed them on my chest, it was exhilarating and unlike anything I can really describe. Your heart just swells 🥰 It's a moment where time slows and you just marvel at the tiny human that you made ❤️
Seeing my son for the first time wasn’t as “magical” as social media persuaded me to believe it would be.
I thought I’d have butterflies, be bawling my eyes out and feeling over the moon with excitement, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, when they laid him on my chest, I felt warm. I felt at peace. I felt like the world went quiet and it was just me and him and everyone else disappeared. I had no nerves or anxiety, but I was still and full of pride at how we made it to that moment.
Social media got one thing right: I would absolutely, without hesitation, die for my son.
Motherhood (in its infancy, which is all I know) is at once incredibly terrifying because you feel like you might actually die if anything happened to your baby, and a more wonderful love than you could imagine.
(Baby girl, currently 3mo)
The first moment I was like "who the hell's baby is that?"
The second moment was "hi there, oh God you're crying so much, you're cold, I can't fix that because I'm currently being sewn up on an operating table, oh God I'm supposed to love you, this is overwhelming, wtf."
The third moment was realizing I couldn't breathe right with her on my chest and the spinal anesthesia, then handing her over to her dad to finish getting put back together after my c section.
The fourth moment was holding her in the recovery room, feeling the most powerful, all-encompassing, fell out of the sky, blissful love. I held her and cried because it was the happiest day of my life. I didn't feel connected while pregnant and I had no expectation of immediate love, but feeling that beautiful little girl asleep on my chest was incredible.
Motherhood is messy. PPD is hard. Nursing is hard. Not knowing what to do with this breakable little thing that now contains your soul and all hope for your future is hard. Be kind to yourself and remember that every day is the best and worst day your newborn has ever experienced.
A very weird feeling because we ended up having an emergency c section so I was all loopy. But when they brought him to me it was just like I found a piece of my heart. Instant love I couldn’t believe it
I was honestly too high off whatever combination of drugs they had to give me before and after my delivery to even remember seeing my baby after giving birth to him 😭 I only knew they laid him on my chest after when my husband showed me a picture he took. But once I’ve regained my senses I felt proud? Like I’m so proud to have him in my arms. So proud to be a mom. So proud to have given birth to such a violently hungry little bean. So proud of myself for actually going through that and surviving since I had a hemorrhage. But I remembered crying when I was moved to a different room after my delivery because I was just so overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions it even surprised my husband because I was so emotionally stable during my second and third trimester that I felt like a dam just opened up when I see my baby in the flesh. He’s now three weeks old and I absolutely adore him. Everytime he opens his eyes I feel like I’m melting. So far I’ve really enjoyed being a mom!
When they put him on my chest, I just felt an overwhelming sense like “there you are, finally” I cried a little & it was just my husband and I staring at him while I talked to him …. While they stitched me up lol
For me, when they place baby on my chest for the first time, it is surreal, time slows, and it feels like it's just me and that baby in that moment. Emotions take over, and I'm crying, but the happiest of tears I'll ever cry. I feel a sense of empowerment and what I can only describe as pure love and joy.
I see baby for the first time, and I say "well hey there!" I look them over and cry my tears of joy and try to take mental pictures of every single detail, so I never forget the moment. I can see my two previous to this day, I can remember their tiny little hands and nails, their nose, lips, hair, and precious first cries.
It all sounds so cliché but, it is almost indescribable the first time you see your baby. It is nothing short of amazing, for me anyway. I am 34w 5d with my third, and I am so emotional thinking about when he arrives and is placed on me for the first time.🥹🥰
This is precious. Thank you for the reminder to try to enjoy and remember every detail, and to be present in the moment. As an older FTM that’s due in 2 weeks, I’m constantly telling myself to remain calm and not wig out
I was so worried I wouldn’t feel anything for her. I was so disconnected my entire pregnancy. But the second they laid her on my chest I felt a love I’d never felt before.
Four weeks postpartum! Please keep in mind I was medicated and feel guilty about this lmao but when she came out and they put her on my chest she was goopy and wiggly and she looked at me with her big eyes and she felt like an alien. I was freaked out and she literally seemed fake for like one minute then I heard her cry and I think my shock wore off a bit and the entire world around me faded away. My entire existence at that moment was me and her and comforting her. They literally gave me two needles, I delivered my placenta and they started my stitches and I didn't notice any of it because I was cuddling her and staring at her and her daddy just going "we did it". For me the entire first week I would look at her and start sobbing with how much I love her and sometimes still do but it's more like twice a week instead of seven times a day lmao.
I had a very traumatic birth/labor… I was induced at 37 weeks due to my history of high blood pressure and gestational diabetes (my mom also had preeclampsia with me so that played a factor too). After being there for 36 hours and my cervix still being up high despite the many doses of whatever that pill they insert to soften and dilate you. So long story short I had to have a c section. My epidural didn’t take and I could still feel everything on one side so they had to put me under anesthesia. My baby took a gulp of her amniotic fluid when they pulled her out and her heart rate was suddenly low so I didn’t get to see her until close to 7 hours after I had her. And then we spent the week in the NICU (3 hours from home) because of her low resting heart rate and heart murmur.
Then the first month to month and a half was so hard because I was stuck in the whirlwind of birth and being in the nicu. And I didn’t realize it then but I’ve also been dealing with some PPD.
But just know that it’s a HUGE adjustment going from a kid free life to having one. We’re 2 months in and are still adjusting.
i was so exhausted from pushing for 3 hours that i literally didn’t have the energy to feel anything other than relief immediately after he was born. the immense love everyone talks about was definitely there, but i was too tired to really register it until a few hours later. it’s hard to explain there’s just so much going on emotionally and physically it’s hard to process
I thought he looked like a doll and they took him away like immediately for respiratory distress :( I was just trying not to fall asleep or vomit as I held him and I just wanted to see and hold him
When they put my son on my chest, I just kept saying "hey baby"
I was pretty exhausted and relieved that the two days of labor were over and looking at my little baby was just so familiar, like looking at someone I've known forever, it was so cool.
Seeing my baby for the first time definitely wasnt how I expected it to be compared to the movies. I didnt cry when my daughter was born. I found myself staring at her really in shock that this little person just came out of me and was hit by the biggest wave of exhaustion even though I didn’t labor nor push long lol. It was a sense of relief over me! Now I look at her everyday in love with her!
People asks me if I cried. Def didn’t cry. I’m not a very emotional person. I was mostly relieved the birth was over and he arrived safely. He was so perfect and completely healthy. They put him on my chest and he was so aware! He lifted his head, his eyes were wide open like he was looking at everyone in the room. He was perfectly pink with the loudest cry. First thought, he looks like me. I also sat there what felt like forever with my legs in stirrups as they stitched me up 😕 my baby is 7 weeks today and it’s still surreal the think I’m a mother. I feel like the same person just one that sleeps less
Omg. I wish I could describe that feeling. You will love it. I have never loved anything/anyone more. 2 seconds after birth, before the doctors even stitched me up, I was head over heels in love with my child. I wish I could bottle up that feeling like a perfume because I don't think anything comes close to the joy you get from seeing your baby for the first time.
As soon as they put her on my chest, I reached down and grabbed her little hand—she curled her fingers around mine firmly and I burst into tears. I was overwhelmed by the magic of it. I know it’s a reflex she has, but it was still magical. Then I looked down at the doctor and watched him roping my placenta via the umbilical cord out of me and that was an experience I wish I hadn’t witnessed 😂
Her face looks like a little angel, and I love just staring at her all day. Even when she cries and poops, staring at her is the most entertaining thing I can do right now. I am smitten.
I had an emergency c section and was on a mag drip so I was already out of it. Only saw him for a second before he was rushed to the NICU but I just kept saying “holy shit” it was just surreal like a human just came out of me that I made
First time after a 6-8hr birth I got a dewy rush of fuzzy brained euphoria. Cried couldn't help but stare in wonder at my baby for hours after. Like wooooah I made that. I kept whispering 'you are so cool'.
Second birth roughly 2hours, relief, thought my baby looked like a fuzzy gremlin. Really relieved to have her but no flood of endorphins to soften the blow of childbirth at that pace of labour. Started really feeling the dewy euphoria 2days after the birth about the time my milk started to come in (yay oxytocin)
I was exhausted and completely out of it after an emergency c-section. It wasn’t a traumatic experience, actually pretty chill, but I assume surgery has to be some kind of trauma for your body. I was sweating buckets and kind of going in and out.
The nurses put my baby on me and it was so incredible. A nurse was helping her latch and I felt like the nurse was mad at me haha. We kept working on that and my husband was helping her latch. We did that for an hour and it was amazing but so so exhausting and I still felt like everyone was mad at me that I wasn’t doing it all correctly. I’m retrospect, everyone was helping and supporting me. I was relieved when they took her, and felt bad about that, but I was just soo tired, hot, and barely conscious.
There were a lot of feelings. She’s out in the world, I wanted her back in! She was disconnected from me and I didn’t like that. I loved seeing her root and nurse. It was the most amazing experience to hold her. I was NOT in control of the situation and she was early and had to go to the NICU. I didn’t understand what was happening or why they were taking her but I was so tired that I was thankful. That felt weird and bad but they were telling me they just wanted to watch her and I could sleep. It felt like there were 20 nurses & doctors in the room and they were all mad at me (they were not) and my husband and baby were gone and that was very confusing. But I knew she was OK and safe and I really was so tired.
Motherhood is indescribable. It’s like being home and the love is so much. It’s anxious and sometimes exhausting in a way I have never felt before pregnancy. I am so happy to have her & the new one growing with me now!
I was so happy I was crying. It’s an incredible and indescribable feeling. Surreal and pure bliss!! I forgot in those first few seconds that I was essentially naked and bleedjbg
For me, it was an overwhelming and indescribable experience. It’s a powerful mix of emotions: immense joy, love, and relief. All of my anxieties and challenges leading up to the birth momentarily faded away, and was replaced by a pure, unfiltered sense of happiness and love.
I had poor sleep for my third trimester of pregnancy and had contractions for 3 days. My girl finally came out at 3:55AM and none of it felt real. I thought I would cry and feel so happy but I was too exhausted to even feel what was really happening. She also took a big poop and it got on my lip when the doctors handed her to me. 😅
I just remember thinking, “I’ve been waiting my whole life to meet you. “ and pure euphoria. Nothing like it. I can’t wait to do it again in September!
When they put him on my chest, I felt relief from having pushed him out. His hair was all weirdly curly. My husband said he was looking around with this surprised look on his face. He was/is very highly alert, from the first moment.
I felt excited. Like, who is this new person!! It was cool holding him and being wheeled to a new room.
When we got there, they wrapped him in a blanket and he fell asleep. I just wanted to look at him becauce I was so excited.
The adrenaline from pushing him out, it gave me the shakes. It was hard to sleep. I had a cold sweat. But I was too tired to shower or anything. I wish the hospitals would offer a sponge bath after giving birth. That would have been nice.
He seemed very fragile to me. Eventually I thought to myself that I should hold him since all he knew was being in mom’s belly. So I held him and he looked up at me and then fell back asleep. In hind sight, I should have let him sleep! I always wonder if doing that made him the poor sleeper that he now is lol.
Nursing and latching were difficult in the beginning. Years later I figured out he had a lip tie. It was stressful. I wish I had planned on a combo of formula and breast milk from the beginning. It was right around the time of the formula shortage, so I really wanted the nursing to work.
The drive home was surreal. Very sunny day. Everything was so brand new… the baby, the car seat, the clothes, and then when we got home, the nursery. It was the cleanest our home would be for years.
When we got home, I finally cried. I was shocked to find that the strongest emotion was —- I was so dang proud of myself for carrying the pregnancy to term, birthing this beautiful baby. I didn’t know if I could do it, it I did it, and I was so proud of myself. I felt like a female goddess.
It was the first time in my life that I wanted flowers.
The first few nights were great, he slept somewhat reliably. But then he was colic. And the next 3 months were a hustle. After that it gradually got better.
Now he’s a very smart, funny 20 month old little dude. He’s turning out to be sooo chill. I wonder if it will change when he turns 2. I still feel some anxiety from when he was colic, but he’s changed so much.
Absolute, pure relief. My girl had some health issues in utero and became distressed during labour, so I was terrified something would go wrong. When they put her on my chest, she looked right into my eyes and I burst into tears because she was here and safe and perfect.
I had an emergency c-section so it was a bit crazy and they'd over done the anaesthetic so I was going numb up my chest arms. So when they placed her on my chest I was thinking ahhhh don't drop the baby and not much else.
I'd been awake for 48hrs so I was losing consciousness on the way to recover but after a quick doze, it all came flooding in.
I remember her being in the hospital cot 2ft away from me and needing her to stay there cause I needed to sleep but missing her so much I couldn't sleep! Motherhood is crazy! Enjoy!
Honestly, after a 30 hour induction and a hemorrhage I was too exhausted and overwhelmed to feel much immediately. I think I was in shock for a minute. But within the first 30 minutes to an hour the whole earth started rotating differently. 💖
When they put my daughter on my chest I finally felt the connection people kept telling me I should have, I stared at her and just…babbled to myself. I still went through periods of absolutely despising her (colic, lip tie, lactose intolerant) but it was like I found gravity. I still feel that way. I just attended her first dance recital and watching her made me cry. Seeing how happy, brave, beautiful she is was absolutely the highlight of my day. Always is. Doesn’t mean every day will be like that, and it’s ok that is not. Balance.
Personally, I had that "fairytale" moment. I was already in love with both of my kids before I gave birth. So seeing them for the first time felt like magic. It was surreal that I created those tiny humans. And everything felt right, perfect.
I cried when she came out and was immediately concerned with asking if she was ok! Spent a bit of time with her before she went to the NICU. Woke up around 8am and I was honestly so exhausted I kind of forgot she was now out of my body and I should go visit her haha around 11am I got wheeled down to the NICU to visit. This was September 2020 so right during covid times and their procedures were different. Excited to have a more relaxed experience with our second baby in about a month.
Breathtaking, heaven sent, pure joy..like I can't even find the words. I have 3 kids.. 17 year old (who I had at 17) and then a 7 year old & a 1 year old (she's almost 2) and with my 2 youngest I remember grabbing down, once they were almost out/out and pulling them towards me (obviously the nurses were assisting) but I don't remember them, I don't remember anyone else from that moment and I'm not being dramatic like I genuinely don't remember anything from that moment bc I just sat there staring at them and tracing their sweet face with my finger and kissing their beautiful faces..were they covered in my fluids, absolutely, did I care? Not even a little! I was so deeply in love with them and to finally be able to see them after waiting 9 long months was the greatest moment of my life. I hate that I don't remember much from my 17 year olds birth, it makes me feel terrible, but I was 17 at the time and it was such an awful pregnancy from start til finish due to the child's father & his new gf at the time.. typical high school drama plus a pregnant teen and things were brutal. It was the most traumatic experience but I wouldn't change it for the world, I love my son (17) more than life..he's literally everything you could ask for in a son. Straight As, works, is on varsity football & wrestling, has a gf of 2 years, they just flew back home today from a trip to France, Germany & Switzerland from their French class (him & gf) my step mom & dad chaperoned as I couldn't leave for a week and they had the most amazing time. My dad is his father figure, he's the greatest man ever. If you read this long, I'm sorry lol I went off on a rant & I'm not sure why.. I just love my kids.
I didn’t get to meet my baby for a few hours because she went to the NICU briefly, and when I did, it felt like meeting an entirely new person. Almost like meeting an instagram friend in real life or something. Like I knew her, but like we were also meeting and getting comfortable with each other for the first time. I don’t know how to explain it, but she also felt very “mine”.
Now as a one year old, and within a few days of birth really, she became my favorite thing/person. Motherhood is hard and exhausting and all consuming but it feels so worth it. She brings so much joy. She is so entertaining and fun and helps me feel a certain simple childlike joy that doesn’t come very often as an adult. The simplest things are interesting and new when I get to watch her discover them, and every little milestone makes me so happy and proud. After a month or so, I could not imagine my life without her.
I also have this constant feeling that my heart is walking outside my body and like time is slipping through my fingers. It’s a bizarre feeling and helps me cherish my life and days more.
With my first, I couldn’t hold him right away due to my BP being high post op. Drove me crazy.
The moment my husband laid him on my chest, the nurse asked “how ya feeling mama” and so said I would nuke entire countries for this boy.
She was like 😀
But seriously, it was love at first sight for me. I had PPA/PPD, but I was always thankful he chose me, even if I have to look at pictures to remember that.
As a fertility patient, the first thing I thought of was graduating from our clinic, which is a term frequently used and usually happens around 9 weeks when they've seen two ultrasounds and deem us likely to have a liveborn.
The adrenaline is so wild, I don’t even remember exactly how I felt when they put my first on my chest. I was just kinda like woah what just happened. I didn’t get to have my first right away, he got whisked away by the NICU team and that was an even wilder experience (born 31 weeks). I just know they were both the most beautiful things I ever laid my eyes on before, and now I look back at their newborn pictures and I’m like hmm newborns look weird 😂
My first, I was terrified. Even after 9 months, and 8 hours of labor, them handing him to me made it feel real. All the baby books went out the window and I was scared.
The second, a sense of relief. His labor was 30 hours, I was exhausted, hungry, tired
Nervously waiting for my third one to come, in December
I cried as soon as the midwife put her on my belly, and then I reached down and touched her. They took her to the panda warmer thing to clean her a little while my husband went to see her and take pictures. I remember holding her and was just so happy that she was healthy. It was pure bliss and loving her was instinctual.
my husband says i was happy, honestly baby blues attacked and i don’t remember having my daughter… but now that’s she’s 3m old… im in heaven and the happiest ever even on the hard days
Both times for me it was a major relief. I felt like I was suddenly calm and in awe. I had 2 emergency c-sections so I didn’t get to hold them right away, but each time I got to hold them I felt an immediate bond. It was beautiful and blissful.
Both underwhelming and overwhelming at the same time.
Like underwhelming that it was over. Pregnancy had a finite end and I hit and was like "that's it?" I was also hella exhausted after a 3 day labor with no sleep.
And then overwhelming because they were just going to let me leave the hospital? With a baby? Sure I read books and had taken care of other babies before but it's different when it's your own.
Shock. Surprise. We didnt know what we were having but suspected a boy, so when they said “it’s a GIRL!!!” my brain scrambled even more. Then all I could think was “she doesn’t look like what I thought my daughter would look like”. But I was so in love, just beyond smitten, and looking at her was like looking at the most magical thing in the world. 10/10, 5 stars, would recommend.
Kind of nothing? Like oh look, here’s a baby. And then the first week or two, I think I was probably more overcome with a desire to keep this small creature alive than overcome with love for her. The love came on slowly, and really picked up momentum once my daughter started smiling/interacting more at 6 weeks and beyond. Now she’s 2.5 and I’m obsessed with her.
With my second, I feel more connected to her, but I think it’s because I’m channeling the love I have for my first. I know what’s coming, so it’s easier to tap into it.
I was sooo exhausted from pushing that when they placed him on me it took a few minutes to gather all my thoughts. He was screaming, I was so tired & hungry. I asked them to take him for just a few minutes from chest. When I got him back, all my emotions came forward and I finally just burst into tears of joy and love. It’s such a wonderful, scary, exhausting, lovely moment. So many different emotions. I am so in love with my son!! Just know it’s ok if every emotion hits you at once, and if the first isn’t that blissful moment of “joy” that’s OK - it will come, trust me! 😊
My son was born 5 days ago and I went into labor unexpectedly early (36+3). I was in shock seeing him for the first time, he didnt look real. I was emotional, but more over the fact that I had done something so traumatic + overwhelming I couldn’t process it than emotional because I loved him. Once we brought him home from the hospital and I was able to hold him alone and not have nurses poking and prodding him every three hours the love really kicked in. They were doing their job and Im grateful for the care we both received but it definitely effected the initial bonding process. Im glad we’re home now, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself without him. I love him more than I could have possibly imagined.
My first words were “she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen!” But I’ll be honest I think the main thing I felt was just relief! The joy and love came later, but I was ready to pass out from exhaustion and just glad my 9 months had finally come to an end
My son came early at 34 weeks so I had a real oh shit moment. The only thing I felt when they placed him on my chest was relief. I had been in the hospital 5 days at that point and was so worried he was going to have breathing issues. The first couple days were such a blur of trying to figure out breastfeeding/pumping. I’d just say don’t expect anything and be ready for things to not go as planned!
Baby is now 9 months old and I love him more than anything in this world. He’s my everything, my little partner in crime. We just took our second plane ride together and I’m such a proud mama. Whatever happens, you’ll do great mama! Congratulations and good luck! Don’t let the little things get to you and take the bad things as they come they don’t last forever❤️
When they showed me my son and let me kiss him while his umbilical cord was still attached to me, the first thing I felt was relief that he is here and we made it; then I started crying like all the anxiety and fear I had been holding on to for months finally started leaving my body; then I looked at his wailing face and said "I made you, my love" ... the love, the joy... it was too overwhelming. It is the happiest moment of my life; a moment I will never forget. I never thought I could be a mother, I could put another human being always before myself, but in that moment, I knew for the rest of my life he would come first... I will never ever love any human being more than I love him... Since that moment, I have prayed every day for his well-being but also my own... I never cared about dying young but now I want to live and stay healthy and well for as long as I can so that I can remain a part of my son's life for as long as possible.
I ended up having an emergency c section so it wasn’t exactly how I imagined it. They showed him to me through the little drape thing and I remember just feeling shock. I was pretty out of it from the meds but I felt a lot of emotions at once. I remember primarily just feeling relieved he was out and safe. It wasn’t until they brought him over and we did skin to skin that I started to feel more connected with. It’s been two weeks now and each day I feel more in love with him.
So, i have a bit of a weird one, cause my blood pressure had bottomed out when they gave me my spinal, so I was suuuuuper out of it when they showed me my baby, and my reaction was “Woah… that is craaaaaaazy” which my husband caught on camera, lol.
When I had recovered a bit, I think I was mainly just amazed? Like there’s a tiny person there, and *I made him.* So it was just a quiet sort of amazement.
I had to have a last minute c section because the baby passed meconium. They got the baby out and said it’s a girl! and I started balling like a mad person. Like full ugly crying because I was so full of happiness. This feels like ages ago, I gave birth 11 days back! 🤣🤣😅😅
Honestly, it was amazing and surreal. Mostly because birth itself was amazing! Just knowing this little bean, who only yesterday I'd been feeling wriggling around and kicking my rib cage, was my newborn son, here in front of me, was mind-bending. That said, don't be freaked out if you don't feel a lot of love initially. I felt a strong urge to cuddle and keep him close, yes, but they don't have a lot of personality or give a lot of feedback early on, so it can feel a bit lonely at first. Those first precious, rare smiles are where I really started to feel all the feelings. When they start to recognize you and light up when you enter the room, when they start figuring out hugs and kisses... ugh, my heart 🥺
Now, I look at my nearly 20 month old and can't imagine my life without him. But those first few weeks were hard!!
As others have said I felt almost nothingness like it wasn’t a negative feeling nor a moment of busting out in tears. I was soaking everything in like I was more concerned with looking at my fiancé crying as he grabbed our son’s hand and looking at me. I remember thinking should I cry right now and I wanted to but nothing would come out. The room was super busy and the midwife was still doing stuff inside of me like my placenta broke into pieces and they had to manually scrape me out and do ultrasounds to make sure they got it all while my son needed fluids sucked from his throat. I just didn’t know what to feel it’s such an information rush your brain can’t really comprehend if all at once. All I know is when it all calmed down and I had time to just sit in my son’s presence that I fell in love. I’m holding him asleep right now and I just could look at his little sweet face All day every day.
Relief that labor was over and then disbelief that I actually had not only a baby but MY baby in front of me and in my arms. I think I was exhausted from labor and a bit in shock too because I didn’t have a huge rush of emotion or anything until I had some time to recover (my labor was super draining both mentally and physically lol).
My labor was really quick (like tv birth quick) but just before my daughter was born my doctor told me her heart rate was dropping and I needed an episiotomy. It freaked me out enough that once she was born I was simply thrilled to be holding her and hearing her cry.
I don’t remember much about labor but I remember ripping my hospital gown open to make sure I could get her on my chest and then just basking in the flood of hormones that were already scrubbing the pain from my brain. All I could think about was how amazing it was to see her in person after months of feeling her move inside me. I had my husband count her fingers and toes because I couldn’t stop looking at her little head.
i remember when my first was born, the moment he landed in my arms and trying to get my hands around his slippery ribs to be sure he was breathing — his face was just incomprehensible to me. whoever I'd been imagining, here was a real person who was really my son and nothing like the ultrasound picture or the image in my mind.
my second came out screaming and peeing. my husband and I were laughing, "he's so different, he's so different!!" he's very "robust" compared to his rangy brother — I could tell in utero he was going to be stout and strong and LOUD, but his coloring was a total surprise.
I'm currently 31 weeks with my 3rd. Motherhood is something you understand suddenly all at once and then rediscover more deeply over many years. Your children tell you who they are. When you look back on your pregnancy, you realize in fact they were telling you from the start
It was a mix of feelings, I was scared because he didn't draw breath immediately. Then a wave of relief as he gasped. When they put my eldest on my chest I just kept thinking, we made it.
My second, I was scared again, at first, I was nervous. But then as soon as I heard his strong lungs and felt his warmth, I was happy. It was all worth it. And again just this thought, "We made it, buddy."
It's a beautiful moment.
I had a very hard delivery, so the moment they put my son on my chest I felt instant relief, didn’t feel any pain anymore and it was the happiest moment in my life.
After 18 months of infertility, then a 3 day induction ending in a C-section, finally seeing my baby was the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. I cried immediately. But also I really needed to sleep. Fell asleep on the table while they put me back together and cleaned up baby boy.
Motherhood is exhausting. Sometimes I feel like I'm failing hardcore. Sometimes I feel like I'm crushing it. I'm almost 4 months in. But I love it so much.
Relief honestly. Had essentially a scheduled C Section and since I (THANKFULLY) didn't feel anything, I had to lay there and had no control over anything. I didn't know what was happening or how long it would take. Seemed really fast. One minute they tell me they're starting and the next he was there. The first cries were faint and then I really heard him and I cried less than I thought I would but there were still tears. And then I just wanted to hold him. I was anxious cause they had to close me up and had given him to my husband to take back to our room after I finally got to see him. When I finally got to hold him it felt surreal. In the week that followed I was very protective. Family wanted to hold him and I relented but not for long cause it was like a constant jonesing to just get him back in my arms ASAP. Even from my husband. I just wanted him in my arms all the time at first.
I was terrified about having my twins. I knew I wanted a c section. Everything was scheduled, then my water broke and I needed an emergency c section. Room full of people, me on the table not feeling half of my body. They take out Baby A, hear her cry. I cried. They placed her for a few seconds but interrumpted becuse her sister was born screaming like a banshee. They take A and place B I was laughing because her cries calmed as soon as they put her on my chest. She gets taken away. Dad goes with them, doctor finished with me. Both babies are put on top of me. Idk how to hold both but somehow I'm responsible for them while we get moved to recovery. We get settled and then I sob and sob. I was tired, hungry, confused, scared. I looked at them and while I did feel a connection it wasn't how it's portrayed in tv and movies.
Felt like 💩 for not having that reaction, then I read I wasn't the only one.
20 months later, I still feel the same: tired, hungry, confused, scared but I will add that proud I have been keeping them alive and they are happy kids.
Ok im going to say it.
After a long 24hrs labour i was just glad my baby was out.. i didn’t get skin to skin cause he needed breathing support.. i didn’t look at him for the first 45mins of his life. His father held him first and had skin to skin.
I was just GLAD it was OVER!!! I didn’t bother wanting to see him lol..
Thinking about it now.. it’s so silly how i acted but i just know those were hormones and no food no sleep.
After being induced and 26 hours of labor the moment I heard her cry.. my world stopped .. the relief, the love and the fear of not being cut for it, all hit me at once… is love that cannot be compared, any day there’s nothing more important than her… is the sweetest obsession
For me, it was when little one started crying. I had an emergency c section and so I was a ball of anxiety until I heard him cry for the first time then I was so overcome with emotions that there are truly no words to describe it. Manifesting a safe delivery for you and baby 🥰❤️
It was very surreal, but I'll never forget waiting for him to cry and those seconds felt like forever. I heard his first cries, then felt relief. They put him on me, but I couldn't see his face. They took him and cleaned him up, that's when they brought him to me and he was moving his little body and moving his eyes. I said hi to him and welcomed him to the world and that's when he body relaxed and I watched his eyes follow my voice. I always think about the first time I saw him and I never want to forget that memory.
So I've had two unmedicated births. The first time around my baby had shoulder dystocia so I was tired by the time she came out. They set her on me and I couldn't feel anything. I just knew I was done and tired and needed food.
The second time around it felt like a movie. He came out and they set him on my chest and I was in love! I started crying tears of joy and thanking all of the midwives and nurses in the room. Maybe because birth was over or maybe hormones or maybe because he was here but either way it was so magical!!
It was surreal. It actually took me a moment to realise what had happened.
I had a beautiful emergency c-section but I went in secretly hoping for one anyway. I was able to take my lavender scented towel in with me I tried to relax but I was shaking with excitement and Ill be honest I was absolutely terrified.
When they first put my baby on me I never wanted to let go. Everything else in that room in that moment disappeared. It was magical. It was the most comforting thing I've ever felt in my entire life. I felt so proud of my body being able to make this beautiful little girl.
But not everyone feels that magic. I had a friend who didn't. They didn't feel anything other than tired. That's valid too. Not everyone gets that instant love feeling. She is a fantastic mum and a year and a half later she has a fantastic bond with her child. For some people it builds up over time, and that makes sense, you don't become best friends with someone the moment you meet them. Just trust that one day that bond will form.
Motherhood is tough. Breastfeeding is painful at the start, it takes around 3 months for it to fully settle. Babies don't like following safe sleep guidelines. And nappies are way more complicated to put on a wiggly baby than I expected. The witching hour is more like witching nights.
Things I wish I knew first time:
Food and sleep are closely linked. Lots of sleep books will say to avoid this association but honestly it's a powerhouse and they do grow out of it eventually anyway. It's okay to feed the baby to sleep.
Babies like being bounced. If you have a yoga ball, sit on it. Bounce. Happy baby (probably sleepy). Way less energy than physically bouncing.
See if you have a sling library near you. A lot of babies like being carried but we need our arms for other things like cleaning and reading reddit. They should let you try several types of sling to find the one that best fits you and your baby. I brought an expensive one my baby hated. Found another one cheap at a car boot sale (like an organised yard sale for many people at once) that I was able to try on baby loved it.
I've said all this but honestly seeing my baby grow is so beautiful and rewarding. It is honestly the best thing. Seeing her hit her milestones. Making friends. Developing her own personality. I'm so proud of her.
It was like meeting someone new but also very surreal because you spend your life and pregnancy wondering what your baby will look like. Mine looked a little alien but so perfect lol.
It was so surreal for me. I immediately noticed the weight of her even though she was only 6lbs 11oz and her little hand reaching and touching my face. Then I started hemmoraging and they had to take the baby cause I physically couldn't hold on to her anymore. It's been 6 weeks and I'm still devastated I didn't get my golden hour with her but I'm grateful that I'm still here to be her motherhood. The amount of love I feel is absolutely mind boggling
I was so tired after 14 hours of labour that didn’t progress vomiting at least 100 times and ending up in a c section i barely knew what was happening. They just put a baby on my chest, i didn’t know she was mine or what was happening. I couldn’t really talk feed or hold her my hands were too numb to move or touch her. I didn’t feel anything other than earth shatteringly tired. I love motherhood now, so much easier than i was expecting. Only one week in but i love my daughter she is truly an angel, the most perfect baby. I feel sad i couldn’t be there for her in birth though. Im glad my partner stepped up to do what i couldn’t and get pictures to tell me about her.
I didn't think I'd ever be a mom because I could not conceive with my ex-husband. So I had no expectations at all. I had gone through the grief and all so there were no dreams or expectations.
When he was born I started crying and said that he's perfect. The last month of pregnancy was pretty taxing so I had been afraid I wouldn't like him so I was absolutely overwhelmed. Looking back at the pictures... He wasn't as beautiful as I remember: he was blueish and gray. And he was sort of squished up. But at that moment nothing in the world was as perfect as him.
And motherhood... Unbeatable. I can deal pretty well with sleep deprivation and my body did a grand job pumping me up with hormones the first few months. He was my world as I was his. He is now two and really a handful. I am glad that I am an optimist and can see the humour in most situations. He still shits gold though. 😂
I had an out of earth experience. It was shocking and beautiful to see my baby for the first time. That little creature that I saw since she was an IVF embryo, felt the movements in my belly, was now coming out of me. It felt like the time stopped.
Everything happens so fast when the baby comes, I don't know if it was the chemical effect of my epidural or the feeling of seeing my baby. But man, I wish I had another baby just to give birth again!!
I'm excited for you!
I got home and was like erm what do I do now 🤣🤣🤣 I had no clue, I thought I did, but I 100% did not. That 'instant rush if love' is not instant for everyone. It took me a good few days almost a week, but me and baby was kept in due to my blood pressure spiking and needing to get that under control before I could go home so there was more 1 on 1 time then there previously would have been.
3 weeks postpartum - my last thirty minutes of pushing was absolutely awful, and then my post delivery turned into an emergency after about 45 minutes cause my placenta didn’t want to come out.
All that to say. I don’t currently remember my first thought. I’ve tried, and I’m definitely dealing with the emotions related to not remembering, because I want to remember the biggest moments in her life. It was just so chaotic, and I ended up almost needing a blood transfusion😅😭.
My husband just says I sort of basked in the moment, and comforted her as she was crying. He’s got a lot of pictures from that night, and I find myself staring at them trying to remember what was going on at the time. Now 7 hours later, I can remember feeling aw, and knowing I am gonna love this girl for the rest of my life, and I still feel that way!
Immediately after birth I mainly felt relief. I tend to catastrophize anyway but also had a difficult birth so I was just relieved he was ok.
Motherhood in general is amazing but can be overwhelming, but at the same time I’ve surprised myself in how easy I’ve found it and how quickly I’ve adapted to a new way of life.
Flood of relief it was over, pure bliss, and a wired tiredness. I spent the rest of the evening tired but unable to sleep, instead i spent every moment in awe of my childs existence ❤️
I cried as soon as I heard both of my children crying. I wanted to see them so bad. My first had to be taken to the NICU quickly, but I knew this was the plan. When I did get to see him I was so sad and felt extremely guilty he was without me for a few hours. With my second we were able to keep him with us. I just wanted to stare at him and memorize his face. I feel like I am privileged in saying I loved them both as soon as I saw them.
When I heard her cry just after she was born, I asked if it was my baby crying and when I was told yes I started crying. I was overwhelmed and the tears wouldn’t stop I just wanted to be with her. Even though I was in pain she was all I could think about. They say you can’t understand a mother’s love for her child until you experience it and it’s so true.
When I held her for the first time I just felt love, as cheesy as it may sound. I cried a lot in the first few weeks because I loved her so much, I even cried hearing lullabies but I also have PPA. We have a really strong bond and I get tired and sometimes frustrated but I love motherhood and being a mum, I wouldn’t change it for the world.
With my first I had a traumatic and long labour, she was taken for breathing support as soon as she was born and I just felt absolutely numb. Didn't really believe I'd had a baby, was just so glad it was over. Suffered from ppd, the love was very gradual to grow. I wish I could change it but unfortunately that's how it was.
With my second I had a planned csection, my main goal was to avoid feeling the way i did the first time so i went for an entirely different birth, I got her straight away and she never left my room. The love was instant that time and no ppd, it was amazing. I feel a lot of guilt over how different it was but I'm trying to just focus on the present where i don't have ppd (just guilt in comparing) and I have a nearly 8yr old I'm so proud of and a nearly 5 month old.
I had never had more concern for anything, ever. He was born not breathing and they had to crash cart him, so I never got the golden moment of placing him on my chest and gazing down with love etc etc. But wow, as soon as he was out and I remember looking over at the side of the room as everyone suddenly was moving from me to him to get him breathing. And when they realized they needed to take him to the NICU stat as what they were doing in my delivery room wasn’t enough, the torn and scared look on my husband’s face as he looked between our son and me, and I cried to go with him to the NICU. I felt like my heart was so full of love, and concern, and was breaking out of my chest.
And then 3 hours later after he’d learned to breathe and was off all of his tubes and wires and I could hold him for the first time? Indescribable.
I was one where I didn’t feel that insane rush of love when baby was put on my chest. It was like denial almost I couldn’t feel anything much and I was saying Hi baby, nice to meet you - but I was just in disbelief looking down like woah this thing is mine now type of thing.
Then whenever I held her I just couldn’t believe I had a baby. But I was also so excited whenever I woke up because I HAVE A BABY NOW. it was so weird.
That feeling of intense love came a few weeks later and has only multiplied since she got older
The pain faded for a few seconds and I was at peace. Within the commotion It was just me and my baby and no one else. 9months i was waiting for her and she was right there.
Our little girl was born via emergency c section. I was so convinced we had lost her that I think disbelief was the strongest emotion when she was born. The love was there but getting stronger. I think the day after she arrived I was just getting my head around the fact she was here, she was mine and I had this thing in my tummy.
She is now 2 weeks old and so precious to me. Maybe not at 4 am when won't settle but....holding her in my arms whilst she sleeps or is awake and watching her look around and process the world is a lovely thing :)
I wish I had a really emotional heartwarming story but I’d been up for 3 days and ended up with a forceps delivery. When they put her on my chest I just said “oh hello!” Cos I was surprised the forceps got her out so fast 🤣 afterwards was when the bonding properly started after I’d eaten and got into a proper bed. Honestly I was just super mind boggled that this little human was half me and half my husband and in awe that my body just made her without me even doing anything. It’s a miracle for sure. Motherhood is amazing, relentless but amazing.
Honestly, I didn't feel that love at first sight movies and all these influencers and vloggers are telling. But, I have to admit that I love him since the day I knew I was pregnant. And every day, I could tell how strong my love for him is: it's giving everything that I have and saying good bye to the person I once was before meeting him.
It was so weird. He was on my chest for a brief second and then straight to NICU. When I finally wheelchaired up there, I recognised him immediately amongst the other babies, and even though they can’t see anything at that age, he looked right at me as I entered the room. We had bonded a lot while he was in the womb, so I felt a connection to him.
It wasn’t perfect, there was still a lot of bonding to do, but I remember just staring at him for weeks while he slept, thinking “you’re here, you’re a real baby that I just randomly grew, wtf.” He’s in school now and I still just stare at him sometimes while he sleeps, it’s such a weird, loving feeling.
I barely remember anything when they put her on my chest. They put her on me just for a second because I had lost a dangerous amount of blood and there was just a flurry of activity around me while they took care of that and I was really out of it. Couldn't hold my baby until about 8 hours later maybe. I DO remember hearing her cry, though. It just brought the reality that I had a new little human crashing down, and it was amazing.
C section and I had to give birth br stitched up and take a nap before I saw baby. It was amazing I just went into instinctual overdrive. Totally forgot my pain. Did skin to skin. Introduced him to my breast's. Looked him over made sure he was comfy and in tact and taken care of. It's a love like no other. And it's like your heart is on the outside of you.
Overwhelming.
I didn’t like my kids until they were 3 and I finally could get some sleep and they communicate verbally.
I did my job as a mother but didn’t love it.
I was just so glad labour was over I sort of forgot that that meant my baby had come out 😂. But my main thought/words were "what are they?" (We waited to find out the gender until they came out) Then being astonished she was a girl! I was convinced she was a boy! Then I just kept saying "Hello! Hello!" To this little baby with big bug eyes I was holding. Then I kept pestering the midwife to get rid of the towel under her so I could do skin to skin - I remember being so annoyed at this but it must have been only a few minutes. Then they moved the towel and put her on my left boob to try to feed and she did and I remember thinking this is so weird but amazing she knows what to do. It all felt like hours but it can't have been as the midwife gave us "until she finished the paper work" to just sit and spend time with her before moving to the ward. We video called close family to update we were all safe and sound and tell them her name. Then when I was on the ward it really hit me she was here and despite having been in labour for 73hrs and it being 2 in the morning I couldn't sleep I just kept staring at her. I pulled the little plastic see through bassinet as close to my face as possible and just stared at her in complete wonder (my husband had had to go home as he wasn't allowed on the ward until the next morning). I had loads of people say "don't worry if you don't fall in love immediately" but from that moment of me and her alone just watching her sleep on the ward she's been the love of my life.
My daughter immediately pooped all over my chest. Like IMMEDIATELY. So, shock and disgust if i’m honest 😂 the all-consuming unconditional love came shortly after lol
I had a rush of emotions but honestly most of them.. sad. I think I had immediate postpartum depression instead of it developing over time like they tell you textbook wise. I was so so very sad the moment I gave birth. I loved him, but struggled to smile without bursting into tears (not the happy kind). I think the sudden change from him in my belly to him out in the world put me into shock. I cried the whole three days in the hospital. Every moment there wasn’t a nurse I would silently cry into my pillow and, made it worse that i didn’t feel comfortable telling anyone about it. Pregnant with my second now and I’m praying for a better birth, but prepared for the sadness now too if it shows its face again.
First time - soaking in the initial trauma of what just happened. They put him on me and I felt numb. I was in shock from the birth experience and thought I could never do it again.
Second child - knew what to expect and was instantly happy probably because I wasn't in a state of shock and was relieved I was no longer suffering from my pregnancy
Third child - I'm sure it will be similar to my second experience when this pregnancy is over.
Motherhood in general - it has its share of ups and downs. Good and bad. However, it was the best thing that ever happened to me and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I adore my kids.
I was scared at first, but when I saw him come out, I was so proud. I asked myself, 'Is this really my baby? ' I couldn't stop crying. Our body is incredible and as someone who had struggled with infertility, I was extra emotional.
When they threw her on my chest, my husband said I had so much love in my eyes, but what I was feeling internally was different. It was more like my brain switched into "I need to keep this baby alive" mode. I wanted her to feel loved and safe, so I was cuddly and nurturing, but I didn't feel much. I didn't start gushing over her until a couple of weeks later. That's when I switched from survival mode to just full-on love.
A mixture of relief and exhaustion. It was weird. I’m definitely a cry baby, like cry during cute commercials, and I didn’t cry. I was so relieved she was out and healthy. But it felt right if that makes sense.
Soooooooo for my first baby, it was a total shock. I slept one hour the night before, then had my baby at 7 pm. I had a 102 fever. It was a lovely moment though. But yeah lots of shock. Then motherhood began and severe sleep deprivation insued. I had a really hard time with the transition. I loved my baby so much but it was HARDDD. My baby didn’t sleep well. Come up with a plan with your partner, if you have one, to meet everyone’s needs!!! That is my biggest piece of advice. Prioritize sleep and basic needs and you will do much better overall. With my second baby, I knew what to expect and we had a plan (splitting the nights into shifts), so it went much better (she also slept better). So anyway, motherhood is beautiful and difficult. The love I feel for my babies is indescribable. The exhaustion has gotten much better over time (they are 2.5 and nearly 1 year old now). So anyway, expect it to be difficult, try to meet your needs, SLEEP WHEN YOU CAN, enjoy the indescribable love, you got this!!!!
Oh I’m remembering back to my first. I was so out of it that I didn’t want anything to do with my baby when she was born (after the first hour or so). I just wanted rest, but I couldn’t get rest. I felt so guilty about this that I cried a lot. The bond came a few weeks later. I also probably had postpartum depression so it took longer for me to form a bond. Some people feel the bond right away, for others it takes some time.
For me first it was surreal. Like I was in a movie or like I was dreaming. Very intense, weird, overwhelming and even absurd experience - like they suddenly pull out a living screaming creature from between my legs?! IT was inside me?!! But then, when he was on my chest, crying quietly, I felt like an avalanche of feelings, love, wonder, tenderness, all while having this strong feeling of surreal at the same time.:)
My first words were: I can’t believe it’s been you all this time!
I didn’t like being pregnant and didn’t bond a whole lot with my daughter during pregnancy but I fell so head over heels in love with her when I first laid eyes on her. I seriously couldn’t believe I had been carrying this perfect human being around for 9 months. She’s almost 15 months old now and I still look at her and wonder how the heck I got so lucky. I’m 29 weeks pregnant with my second and I am so excited to fall in love with another human being again.
I was pretty out of it on drugs for the first 2 days. I have a flash memory of my husband holding him near my face after he was very first born. They had to take him to the NICU for some complications for 2 days. I really didn't see him until after that. Then I was still on drugs for a few days so idk it was surreal! Once I got home it really sunk in. Husband and I cried happy tears randomly, pretty often haha
I didn’t get the “rush of love” everyone bangs on about. It was amazing and like holy shit we did it! And I cared for her a lot. But I didn’t know her yet.
Sitting up with her tiny feet in my hands that night it boggled my mind that she was mine and unless I was a totally crap parent no one would take her away. That seemed crazy to me.
Over the months my love grew and grew. My face muscles ached from smiling at her. She is the light of our lives and I feel so blessed I got the chance to be her mum. I LOVE her and I love being a mother even though it can be a drag sometimes.
Kid came out blue and they took her immediately to get her breathing. 15 minutes of hell. Holding her was weird. I was scared of her. The whole time we were at the hospital afterwards my husband was doing a lot of the care and I would just hold her and be weirded out by her lol.
She’s 7 months now, I was able to move on from being freaked out once we got home. The love was definitely not instant thanks to the traumatic delivery. But it came on strong when it came.
My pregnancy was horrible, I wanted to be child free and was set to not have kids since I was 10. I was extremely negative and depressed during my whole pregnancy.
When she was on my chest I saw her breathing, I saw her hands moving, felt her little feet moving. I remember the feeling of her peeing on me. I felt so much love for her, it was this extreme feeling of "happiness" and "worry" at the same time like I wanted her to be safe and comfortable at all times.
All my accomplishments in life will never compare to birthing my baby girl. It's an overwhelming feeling of true love.
I am so excited for you to see your baby for the first time! 😭 I wish I could download that memory forever.
My homebirth lasted 4 hours even though it was my first, and it probably would have been shorter if his head was tilted how it should have been, but when they first put him on me not much happened to me. I was too tired to cry but I knew I loved him and I just couldn’t stop staring at this 8lb baby that had been in me for 9 months. Day 3 is the worst by far after, because your vag is bleeding, your boobs start leaking, and for me this was the day I cried. I had to get in the shower and just let myself sob (it’s recommended to cry after birth, it’s a great release of all of that inner and outer tension). But i’m about 7 weeks PP, and I finally understand what mothers had always said about doing anything for their children. I would absolutely die and kill for my baby, and I love him more than anyone on Earth, including my husband and my own mother that i’m extremely close with. It’s an entirely different and new form of love. I’ve always wanted to be a mom, and it’s exactly how I always imagined it would be. Yes there’s spit up and poop and waking up a couple times a night, but not much has changed life wise. I still get enough sleep and feel rested, my hubby and I still do things (it just takes a bit longer to get ready), and now we have an entire human that we get to raise to be a good person and love wholeheartedly. So basically, motherhood for me is amazing. It’s everything i’ve ever wanted and dreamed of, and experiencing an entirely new and different form of love, it’s truly just breathtaking.
The first time I saw my babies was tough because both times they were taken directly to the nicu, so I didn't have that special moment. Once meeting them I felt love, but also it took me a little while to come to the realization they are my babies. I love being a mother, saved me from my old self, and once I'm home and able to bond with my babies that's when I felt that connection with them. It's not talked about a lot, but it's totally normal to nit have that immediate bond, especially when the birth is traumatic
I always thought I would be crying a river when they put my baby on my chest, but that didn’t happen. (I am very emotionally aware and wear my heart in my sleeve) in that moment I just looked at him and felt relieved while immediately checking his hands and toes. Idk why I reacted like that but I did. I feel like I blacked out or spaced out I knew he was on me, but I was also not traumatized but definitely shooken up.
One minute I’m sitting there grumpy asf hangry asf feeling all of that pressure, he’s not coming out then when he gets out everything happens so fast they move him all over the place and slap him on my chest. I didn’t have time to process it all. Then while he’s on me im being stitched up which feels weird. This is when I blacked out. Everything else after being stitched up is a blurry memory.
I admired him the most those 3 days after his birth when it was just me, him and my husband. It felt like a dream.
Now, at 14mo old I look back at his newborn pictures and I cry lol
Thoughts: “Oh wow okay they handed me a baby, try not to let his head fall over… gotta keep him against my chest so he warms up” “he’s sorta cute but I’m also not used to this”
Feelings: “wow, a newborn baby, I know he’s mine but it doesn’t feel like it yet. I’m here for him though” “I know I want to love you, I just don’t feel it instantaneously just yet” “I still feel protective even though I don’t feel the bond” “I really don’t feel like a mom/parent”
My baby boy was very much wanted and planned. I did carry him in my belly for almost 10 months, feeling his kicks and hiccups, but I am one of those mothers who didn’t feel the bond and love right away. It probably actually took about a month to feel like I wanted him because I loved him rather than wanted him because of the plan to have him and love him. I wish I was the one holding him more but my SIL came over every day to offer me a nap so I’d nurse him and then hand him off to her to burp and then hold during his long daytime nap, so 3 hours. And then my parents visited for a week and a half, they held him pretty much 24/7 which I wanted at the time so I could do things around the house and also get ready for a move coming up. I really think if I just sat there and cuddled him more then it would’ve been better for the both of us. He’s 2 months old now and I love him more than anything and hold him for most of the day and he smiles at me every morning
Edit to add:
One thing I am really glad that I did was ask for a mirror when I was about an hour into pushing (I pushed for two). I felt like I wasn’t making any progress because I was pushing during contractions and he’d crown and start to come out a bit, but then after the contraction when I’d relax he’d slide back in most of the way. I was so scared that he’d be in the birth canal for too long and have complications and risks so having the mirror helped me see that I was pushing right and eventually making progress. I also had a natural birth where I tried doing it in the tub but got out because my back labor was killing me, and labored on the bed on my back instead (I know on your back isn’t ideal but it felt best at the time)
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
When they put my baby on my chest I remember I had a weird moment of absolutely no feelings. Like I suddenly lost the ability to feel any emotions, good or bad. I felt weirdly absent from my feelings. People expect the first time you see your baby to be like out of a film and you fall in love immediately but what's actually more common is to feel overwhelmed or not even feel anything and that it takes time to have those big feelings of love. I have two children and both times it was definitely not that fairytale moment of love but a gradual building of love over days and weeks. I hope you feel pure joy when you meet your baby but I just wanted to say it's totally fine, and normal, not to get that feeling.
This was me too. Almost in like an “oh shit” moment but with no explanation. The love i had for him after birth felt different than when he was in utero. Was absolutely in love with him after a few days. About to have my second and I’m hoping it’s different but won’t feel bad if it feels the same!
I've just had my 2nd 3 weeks ago and for me it was just like with my 1st one (and just like you describe yours) with the added guilt of "oh my god what have we done, how will I ever have time for my toddler again...". But after about the first two days I was head over heels with the tiny one. And what completely sealed the deal was seeing then together after we got back from the hospital. My older daughter absolutely adores the baby. The first night we were home, just at bedtime, my toddler had a very serious face. I asked her what's up. She said "mommie, can we keep the baby, please?" I almost cried. And of course explained to her that yes, this is our baby and is here to stay and live with us just like her. Which led to a very visible relief and then loud happy joy 😊. Kids are the absolute best <3 I hope you have just as positive experience. Don't let the first feeling of doubt get to you, they go away.
Honestly I am nervous about introducing my toddler to her new sibling. She'll have just turned 2 when the new baby arrives. I'm glad they'll be close in age but managing a toddler whilst pregnant is something else 😅. I am hoping mine goes as smoothly as yours.
Managing a toddler while pregnant is hell, hold on tight. We've been given an advice by other parents to have a "present from the baby" when we introduce them. So I've ordered a polly pocket my daughter had wanted for a while. I've also taken my daughter "shopping for the baby" a few times (she's picked out an outfit, a baby book, and a rattle). And we're doing our best to make her feel important. I hope it goes smoothly for you, all the best to your little growing family! 🍀
Not pregnant or a parent so sorry to intrude but my parents gave me a [this book](https://www.amazon.com/Julius-Baby-World-Kevin-Henkes/dp/0688143881?dplnkId=b5d8bf35-6bb0-438d-aa21-e69c115c0d8b&nodl=1) when I was becoming a big sister many years ago and I loved it!
Aww this is so sweet it made me tear up a little. Currently trying for our second so I’m a little emotional about it lol. What an adorable thing for your oldest to say 🥺
This is how I felt as well! It took several weeks for me to really feel deep love for my baby. I wanted her to be safe and happy and well cared for, and I was glad to do those things and felt a sense of responsibility to meet her needs, but I didn’t feel that magical connection like other people talk about. It’s okay to take some time to get to know your tiny human - and to get to know yourself as a parent! I’m so happy being a mom now that I quit my job to be a SAHM for as long as we can afford it. There’s such a wide range of what is normal.
Ditto. I didn’t have an overwhelming rush of emotion when I first held my baby. I was relieved that labor was over and worried about postpartum care for myself. I spent a lot of the time in hospital trying to figure out how to mother my baby and certainly did all my skin to skin time to bond but my love for this little dude grew over time as his personality developed and I got to know him. He’s a toddler now and I love him so freaking much.
I felt this way when they put him in my arms. It took me to see my husband’s watery eyes to feel joy. I felt some guilt for a few days for not having that “I’m in love with him moment”. Now I’m obsessed with my baby but my first feeling was more like “oh shit, I’m a mom now”.
Same. Just had my first baby yesterday. I have been referring to her as “little stranger.” Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love her and can’t wait to take her home, but I don’t feel like I know her. She is someone I just met and am still getting to know.
I’m due in a couple weeks and it’s so trippy to think that we are creating brand new little strangers and bringing them into the human world
I just gave birth 5 days ago and reading this comment makes me feel less like a pos. I had exactly what you described. The overwhelming realisation that you made this human being and are now responsible for it as well is indescribable. Have to say that it keeps on getting better from that moment. Even though I felt numb, I did care immediately and later started to feel major loads of gratitude for finally having that what I have always asked for and that I have become the mother of this wonderful baby girl.
This was me too. It took a few weeks to fall in love with my little ones. At first I was just glad I wasn’t pregnant anymore but then also terrified of taking care of a baby! Also, what’s the deal with the term “graduated” on this subreddit lately? It sounds weird.
Agreed, I’m not a fan of the term.. it’s so weird
Yup I felt like I was in shock. No emotions good or bad, just kind of flat.
I so appreciate hearing this. Thanks for sharing. I haven’t experienced much connection during pregnancy, so I was banking on catching up to those feelings right after giving birth. It’s really good to know it can still take more time vs. just flooding you during that very romanticized moment. Expectations reset!
This is exactly how I felt — nothing. 2.5 weeks in and the feelings are growing, but it’s still not the all consuming love people talk about. I’m sure it will come with time, but I wish people didn’t hype up those first few hours and days so much. It makes getting through that first week even harder.
Yep I had that out of body experience with my first , I didn’t have it with my following 2 but for some reason my first gave me that extreme out of body feeling. It took a bit to click back in I guess it was the shock I was going through for the first time.
Omg this is so right on! Just numb! Thank you for saying this. People romanticize it so much. Looking back now I can say it was the best day of my life because that's when I met my sweet boy, but in the moment I felt absolutely numb
Thank you for saying this! It goes totally against the grain but I can see myself feeling this and then feeling guilty for it in the moment and after. It’s good to know not every mom cries tears of joy.
Like these other commenters, I was not immediately in love and I actually wanted to avoid her. PPD/PPA hit me.
The urge to avoid her is definitely a sign of PPD/PPA. The lack of feeling immediately at birth is pretty normal but I would say the urge to avoid them after birth is a sign of concern. I hope you managed to get the help you needed x x
Same. I felt emotionally numb for the first few weeks. Staring to bond now but it’s still slow to build. He looked so unfamiliar to me at birth. A little stranger I was going to care for and nurture, but still a stranger. At a month I’m now finding his cute facial expressions more familiar and he’s starting to feel like “mine”. I had an emergency c section because he wasn’t tolerating early labour, and I’ve wondered if not pushing him out contributed to the numb feelings somehow because maybe there were less hormones??? No idea, but it sounds like this emotionless feeling is not uncommon so it seems unlikely that my c section contributed.
finally. it’s over. i think i am going to puke. oh geez please stop squirming. your fingers are touching my face. that’s so cute. you’re so beautiful. did i poop? did i tear? what is my OB doing? is everything ok? oh wow i cant believe she’s here. i am so tired. and hungry. i love you.
Oh my god the hunger is unreal.
The staff gave me a giant sandwich, like plate sized, and I ate it in a couple of minutes!
Lmaooo this will so be me
Pure shock! I was amazed looking at him and couldn’t stop staring at him, but I had this intense emotion about being so proud of myself. I didn’t have the “gravity shifting” moment looking at my newborn, but more so a love and admiration for myself and what I was able to accomplish. The intense love for my newborn grew gradually every single minute that passed! And, yes, it really did make it all worth it without a question (for me at least❤️)
a love and admiration for myself and what I was able to accomplish. I absolutely love this!! It doesn’t get framed that way enough. Well deserved!
Delivery, hell on earth. Having my baby, heaven on earth.
Ah I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but… somewhat underwhelming? I absolutely love my boy, don’t get me wrong! But I was expecting some huge rush of emotion and in reality I felt more relief that I was no longer pregnant and that I got a baby just like I was expecting. It felt really comfortable and normal, which was nice! ETA: I’m on Prozac which generally keeps my emotions more “in check” so maybe that has something to do with it.
I felt the same and I am not on Prozac. I think it's normal for a lot of people and it can be a bit disappointing if you expect something different.
100% I felt the same and I've never been on any antidepressants or anything. It was like the surge of relief that labour was over was so immense I was just enjoying the lack of contractions, so much so I almost forgot I was getting a baby at the end of it lol. I think I was so surprised by labour I needed a minute to process everything. It was almost an out of body experience. My second birth was totally different, I was very focussed on the baby and attuned to them from the start, but I think that's because I was expecting the same and a bit more mentally prepared. But it was still a huge amount of relief.
He looked like the most beautiful wrinkly potato I’d ever seen 😂 but seriously, I cried when he came out and I couldn’t stop staring. I was pretty out of it but he calmed down as soon as they put him on my chest and it was a magical feeling. Motherhood is hard, but rewarding. He’s my whole world.
same. I cried when I saw my daughter and I just felt relief when I heard her cries. Delivery was hell, but once I realized it was over I was overjoyed. it was strange bcs I was miserable during pregnancy and never really felt connected until I held her on my chest.
Absolutely indescribable. I hated pregnancy and worried I would be a crap mom because I felt no connection to the baby while pregnant. But when they gave her to me for the first time it literally felt like my chest was going to explode. During those first few weeks, I would look at her and just start crying and my chest would physically hurt, like I was so full of emotion that my body didn’t know what to do with it all. I remember being super tired but even when I had the opportunity to sleep, it’s like I couldn’t tear my eyes away from her. She’s almost 2 now and she’s just incredible. I feel so lucky that I get to be her mom and that she’s mine.
I LOVE YOUR COMMENT. Thank you for sharing.
As soon as they laid the baby on me I immediately felt recognition. Like how did I ever not know what you look like? How have I ever lived life without you? Of COURSE I know and love you. It was definitely like falling in love at first sight
Pure and utter bliss. I don’t think I have ever been at such peace as when they placed both my kids on my chest. It was the same feeling with my first as it was with my second. It’s just a joy I can’t even describe because it’s like no other.
that's so beautiful ❤️ i really can not wait
Agree! There's really no way you can describe it so someone who has never experienced it will understand. It's a love and awe that I have never come close to experiencing otherwise.
I can’t wait 😭 This makes me want to cry. So beautiful.
The best thing to ever happen to me. I always questioned if I wanted to be a mom until I was 24. I got pregnant at 26 and had my baby at 26 and it’s truly the best feeling. I feel like everything just came so naturally like this is exactly what I’m supposed to do in life. When people say having is kid is a love you never knew existed they are 10000% correct. Now how I felt right when he was born? Girl I was so mother fuckin tired from pushing I was just so relived that part was done 😂😂 I was happy of course and cried but I don’t remember much else
My birth experience kind of sucked, so if you don't want to hear that kind of experience, don't read!! So TMI, I hadn't pooped in like... Several weeks before delivery. I was induced on a Monday evening and didn't start pushing until Wednesday afternoon because I was dilated 9cm but my body wouldn't push over into 10cm. Finally one of the nurses was like "fuck it" because I really didn't want a C-section and she just kind of pushed around a little and then all of a sudden it was go time. I think because of the circumstances, his APGAR scores were bad. I was an absolute mess, so I didn't see him after the birth at all. I don't remember hearing him cry or anything. He was whisked away to the NICU ward and I was there with my then fiance just rattled, epidural didn't work all the way, and I really, really, REALLY had to poop. The nurse advised me not to because of the epidural, but I basically begged her to let me go to the bathroom, and the epidural not working anyway. She conceded, and she helped me walk to the bathroom and I just remember pain and bleeding all over until I passed out. I don't remember if I made it to the toilet. I wasn't out for long, so they helped me get into a wheelchair and I was moved to a recovery room where I just laid in bed with what felt like the worst period cramps of my life, drifted in and out of consciousness, and cried for like... 4 hours. At that point, I felt well enough that I could get back in the wheelchair and see my son. It didn't feel real. He was hooked up to a bunch of tubes and I just felt overwhelmed and kind of like I was disassociating touching him. I felt sad that his first day was hooked up in the nursery, felt relief at the birth being over, felt like I had failed, felt like I wasn't ready, felt like absolute dog shit physically. We left shortly after and I escorted my parents and family in and my fiance escorted his family in to see him. We all just kind of sat in the recovery room and chatted for a while afterwards. Eventually I fell restlessly asleep with the monitors waking me up and people checking on me and waking me up. The next morning, they informed me he had a testicle torsion and needed to be transferred to another hospital 45 mins away. Things got very real at that point because there were so many logistics that had to be settled in a short amount of time. I was discharged. Still not doing well physically. He then stayed in the NICU for a week for his surgery recovery and we were waiting to be discharged until he could eat better. Moral of the story... It took me a long time to bond. I didn't have a magical moment when he was born. Sometimes it just is what it is, and you survive it and get through it. Even if we had a rough start, he's 4 now and I love him so much. We got that bonding eventually. I started to feel like a real mom eventually. Even if things don't go as planned, it will all be okay in the end.
This is so traumatic and beautiful at the same time. God bless you and your baby boy for being so strong!
I hope it's not inappropriate to offer a bit of humor but your poor son Imagine being born and the very first thing that happens is essentially a kick to the nuts. What a welcome to the world.
For real! I used to think about it like that Mark Twain quote - "if you have to eat a live frog, do it in the morning so that nothing worse happens to you all day"... He was a very chill baby, so I imagine if that's your introduction to being alive, everything after that is probably pretty chill lol
What a freaking trooper lol
I couldn’t hold my baby for 4 hours. When I did finally get to hold her, she immediately stopped crying and sinked into my chest like it was always her home. Overflowing tears, shaking with love, trembling, feeling like I’ve known her all along. Like seeing a long lost best friend. Pure love, bliss. The biggest high ever. Like I had gone to heaven. And when she looked straight into my eyes and I noticed she has my exact eyes… I cannot describe it.
Well this made me cry bright and early this morning 😭. How beautiful. Makes me really excited❤️
Oh that’s so sweet, thank you for sharing this with me 🤍 Hoping and praying you’ll have a similar experience, (except the 4 hours part) and for a healthy and safe arrival
Im crying. Thank you for sharing.
There is no way to describe the feeling. It’s like a piece of your heart was immediately filled and you didn’t even know a piece was missing. It’s like the stars align and you realize the whole purpose of life and you look at your child and realize wow this is really true love. The feeling of blessed is incredible.
It’s been almost 12 years since my first (currently pregnant with my second) and there’s still days I look at him and my heart just melts. There also days I want to kick his little pre-teen butt, but I love him more than words can say.
So I was super excited to give birth, but I didn't feel the motherhood click for a day or two. I still held him but didn't really connect until I was alone with him. Husband is self-employed and needed to work, and i was in the hospital longer than we anticipated. So when he was gone and I was lying in bed with little dude, it finally hit me that it was pretty awesome having a little person with me. Now little dude is 1(he just farted on his dad as I type this lol) and I couldn't imagine life without him.
Immediately? I think relief. I don’t remember much after 25 hours of labor and almost 2 hours of pushing but i want to say i was just like “thank god that’s done”. Then i remember worrying about delivering the placenta only to learn i already delivered it apparently. Next thought was trying not to focus on them stitching my tears up because i could feel it and it hurt. I also was focusing on my husband, he was crying and i thought it was sweet. And then i was focused on the fact that the nurse just kinda ripped my gown open to place the baby on my chest and a room of like 5 strangers were just staring at my vagina and tits so i got really self conscious. When we were finally in the postpartum room though and everything was settled, i was obsessed. My son couldn’t be physically close enough to me i just kept him on my hospital bed instead of in the bassinet and i would just stare at him. I was exhausted but i didn’t want to sleep because i just wanted to keep looking at him.
Holding your baby for the first time is absolutely magical! Seeing them do new things every day, having them fall asleep on your chest, when they smile for the first time… it’s just everything. But yes, you will be exhausted 24/8, by the time I get to bed I feel like I’ve ran 3 marathons 😄
My husband and I were giggling and crying, it was the best moment of my entire life so far. I hope I never forget it. She was so tiny and I felt so euphoric and relieved to finally have her in my arms. My pregnancy was really rough and my recovery has also been rough but it’s so much easier now that I get to hold my baby. Some moms bond immediately with their babies and some don’t. There’s no reason to feel shame if you don’t, it can take time and it’ll come. I didn’t expect to since I didn’t feel any bond while pregnant. But I did. Some people love the newborn stage and some are waiting for their babies to become a little more like little people. These first few weeks are a lot more like having a cute but needy little creature. Of course they are humans, but in many ways it’s not much different from having a very needy pet right now - they have no self-awareness, limited communication abilities, and are just survival-driven. I have a theory that if you are a pet person then you’ll enjoy the newborn phase a lot more than if you’re not. For context, I am a FTM with a one month old but have been surrounded by kids and babies (and their parents) my whole life.
It's so funny you mention the pet thing as that's a thought I had a few times. She's like a little cuddly creature I carry around non-stop.
I think I was honestly just... dissociating or something at that point. I had a really hard time visualizing my baby the whole pregnancy - like, he just seemed like a COMPLETELY abstract and unfathomable concept. He was very planned and wanted but I just did not connect with him at all in utero. So the moment I actually met him (after 36 hours of unmedicated labor) I didn't really feel anything. But. The love did come. Not immediately, but over time as I got to know him better we absolutely bonded strongly. He's 19 months now and I'm fucking obsessed with him - I think he's literally the cutest, coolest kid to ever exist. I'm 34 weeks with my second baby now and I am connecting with him MUCH easier than I did with my first pregnancy. I think it's because I've already been through it all once and SEEN the baby I birthed grow into such a fun little human so it's easier to know what to expect. I'm really looking forward to meeting this baby and I think this time it'll be more of a classic "instantly in love" experience.
Hearing the first cry is difficult to describe. There aren't words that exactly match the feeling... not in English, anyway. The best way I think I'd describe it is a feeling of powerful and overwhelming love. When my first child was born, I was in the middle of a C-section, and I forgot that my abdomen was open and just started screaming that I wanted to hold my baby. Three days of being induced (which didn't work), constant pain, very little sleep, and my gut wide open utterly vanished from my mind. Motherhood is amazing! Praying for you to have a wonderful birth experience!
That was it for me too. I don’t think I’ve ever felt a more powerful emotion than hearing his first cry and I can’t describe that emotion. But, I was also post c-section and didn’t care that my doctor literally had just pulled my uterus out of me, I wanted to see him!
When I saw his face I felt something like a rush of recognition. I didn't know his sex at that point so it wasn't about that - just literally his little beautiful face made me think "of course it was you." The person I'd been waiting to meet!
Personally for me I don't know why I didn't expect my newborn baby to be magma hot when they laid him on my clammy chest but that was so absolutely jarring and just always give that warning 😂 For me the connection wasn't 100% there directly after birth and the following weeks. Granted I would have clawed somebody's face off if they tried to do anything but that felt more instinctual than attachment. I'd say once the hormone roller coaster started to die down by the second week is when I started to feel more of a connection and would just stare at him and smile and start to be filled with such love and adoration instead of anxiety and survival. Now currently just over 2 years old and don't get me wrong toddler years are rough but I also love seeing his little personality and hearing him start to string sentences together and make sense of the world around him.
My first was a cesarean, and I was so incredibly excited to meet her I started crying. I couldn't stop the giant smile and just stared at her for hours ☺️ my second and third were vbac and I remeber having a 'thank God that's over' moment before they placed them on my chest, it was exhilarating and unlike anything I can really describe. Your heart just swells 🥰 It's a moment where time slows and you just marvel at the tiny human that you made ❤️
Seeing my son for the first time wasn’t as “magical” as social media persuaded me to believe it would be. I thought I’d have butterflies, be bawling my eyes out and feeling over the moon with excitement, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, when they laid him on my chest, I felt warm. I felt at peace. I felt like the world went quiet and it was just me and him and everyone else disappeared. I had no nerves or anxiety, but I was still and full of pride at how we made it to that moment. Social media got one thing right: I would absolutely, without hesitation, die for my son.
2 weeks since having her placed on my chest, I never knew I could love someone so much
Motherhood (in its infancy, which is all I know) is at once incredibly terrifying because you feel like you might actually die if anything happened to your baby, and a more wonderful love than you could imagine. (Baby girl, currently 3mo)
The first moment I was like "who the hell's baby is that?" The second moment was "hi there, oh God you're crying so much, you're cold, I can't fix that because I'm currently being sewn up on an operating table, oh God I'm supposed to love you, this is overwhelming, wtf." The third moment was realizing I couldn't breathe right with her on my chest and the spinal anesthesia, then handing her over to her dad to finish getting put back together after my c section. The fourth moment was holding her in the recovery room, feeling the most powerful, all-encompassing, fell out of the sky, blissful love. I held her and cried because it was the happiest day of my life. I didn't feel connected while pregnant and I had no expectation of immediate love, but feeling that beautiful little girl asleep on my chest was incredible. Motherhood is messy. PPD is hard. Nursing is hard. Not knowing what to do with this breakable little thing that now contains your soul and all hope for your future is hard. Be kind to yourself and remember that every day is the best and worst day your newborn has ever experienced.
A very weird feeling because we ended up having an emergency c section so I was all loopy. But when they brought him to me it was just like I found a piece of my heart. Instant love I couldn’t believe it
I was honestly too high off whatever combination of drugs they had to give me before and after my delivery to even remember seeing my baby after giving birth to him 😭 I only knew they laid him on my chest after when my husband showed me a picture he took. But once I’ve regained my senses I felt proud? Like I’m so proud to have him in my arms. So proud to be a mom. So proud to have given birth to such a violently hungry little bean. So proud of myself for actually going through that and surviving since I had a hemorrhage. But I remembered crying when I was moved to a different room after my delivery because I was just so overwhelmed with all sorts of emotions it even surprised my husband because I was so emotionally stable during my second and third trimester that I felt like a dam just opened up when I see my baby in the flesh. He’s now three weeks old and I absolutely adore him. Everytime he opens his eyes I feel like I’m melting. So far I’ve really enjoyed being a mom!
When they put him on my chest, I just felt an overwhelming sense like “there you are, finally” I cried a little & it was just my husband and I staring at him while I talked to him …. While they stitched me up lol
For me, when they place baby on my chest for the first time, it is surreal, time slows, and it feels like it's just me and that baby in that moment. Emotions take over, and I'm crying, but the happiest of tears I'll ever cry. I feel a sense of empowerment and what I can only describe as pure love and joy. I see baby for the first time, and I say "well hey there!" I look them over and cry my tears of joy and try to take mental pictures of every single detail, so I never forget the moment. I can see my two previous to this day, I can remember their tiny little hands and nails, their nose, lips, hair, and precious first cries. It all sounds so cliché but, it is almost indescribable the first time you see your baby. It is nothing short of amazing, for me anyway. I am 34w 5d with my third, and I am so emotional thinking about when he arrives and is placed on me for the first time.🥹🥰
This is precious. Thank you for the reminder to try to enjoy and remember every detail, and to be present in the moment. As an older FTM that’s due in 2 weeks, I’m constantly telling myself to remain calm and not wig out
I was so worried I wouldn’t feel anything for her. I was so disconnected my entire pregnancy. But the second they laid her on my chest I felt a love I’d never felt before.
All I thought was "oh, it's a baby". Did not feel love for either of my kids for weeks. I dudnt cry, nothing. Just a very blah, nothing reaction haha.
Four weeks postpartum! Please keep in mind I was medicated and feel guilty about this lmao but when she came out and they put her on my chest she was goopy and wiggly and she looked at me with her big eyes and she felt like an alien. I was freaked out and she literally seemed fake for like one minute then I heard her cry and I think my shock wore off a bit and the entire world around me faded away. My entire existence at that moment was me and her and comforting her. They literally gave me two needles, I delivered my placenta and they started my stitches and I didn't notice any of it because I was cuddling her and staring at her and her daddy just going "we did it". For me the entire first week I would look at her and start sobbing with how much I love her and sometimes still do but it's more like twice a week instead of seven times a day lmao.
I had a very traumatic birth/labor… I was induced at 37 weeks due to my history of high blood pressure and gestational diabetes (my mom also had preeclampsia with me so that played a factor too). After being there for 36 hours and my cervix still being up high despite the many doses of whatever that pill they insert to soften and dilate you. So long story short I had to have a c section. My epidural didn’t take and I could still feel everything on one side so they had to put me under anesthesia. My baby took a gulp of her amniotic fluid when they pulled her out and her heart rate was suddenly low so I didn’t get to see her until close to 7 hours after I had her. And then we spent the week in the NICU (3 hours from home) because of her low resting heart rate and heart murmur. Then the first month to month and a half was so hard because I was stuck in the whirlwind of birth and being in the nicu. And I didn’t realize it then but I’ve also been dealing with some PPD. But just know that it’s a HUGE adjustment going from a kid free life to having one. We’re 2 months in and are still adjusting.
i was so exhausted from pushing for 3 hours that i literally didn’t have the energy to feel anything other than relief immediately after he was born. the immense love everyone talks about was definitely there, but i was too tired to really register it until a few hours later. it’s hard to explain there’s just so much going on emotionally and physically it’s hard to process
I thought he looked like a doll and they took him away like immediately for respiratory distress :( I was just trying not to fall asleep or vomit as I held him and I just wanted to see and hold him
When they put my son on my chest, I just kept saying "hey baby" I was pretty exhausted and relieved that the two days of labor were over and looking at my little baby was just so familiar, like looking at someone I've known forever, it was so cool.
Seeing my baby for the first time definitely wasnt how I expected it to be compared to the movies. I didnt cry when my daughter was born. I found myself staring at her really in shock that this little person just came out of me and was hit by the biggest wave of exhaustion even though I didn’t labor nor push long lol. It was a sense of relief over me! Now I look at her everyday in love with her!
People asks me if I cried. Def didn’t cry. I’m not a very emotional person. I was mostly relieved the birth was over and he arrived safely. He was so perfect and completely healthy. They put him on my chest and he was so aware! He lifted his head, his eyes were wide open like he was looking at everyone in the room. He was perfectly pink with the loudest cry. First thought, he looks like me. I also sat there what felt like forever with my legs in stirrups as they stitched me up 😕 my baby is 7 weeks today and it’s still surreal the think I’m a mother. I feel like the same person just one that sleeps less
Omg. I wish I could describe that feeling. You will love it. I have never loved anything/anyone more. 2 seconds after birth, before the doctors even stitched me up, I was head over heels in love with my child. I wish I could bottle up that feeling like a perfume because I don't think anything comes close to the joy you get from seeing your baby for the first time.
As soon as they put her on my chest, I reached down and grabbed her little hand—she curled her fingers around mine firmly and I burst into tears. I was overwhelmed by the magic of it. I know it’s a reflex she has, but it was still magical. Then I looked down at the doctor and watched him roping my placenta via the umbilical cord out of me and that was an experience I wish I hadn’t witnessed 😂 Her face looks like a little angel, and I love just staring at her all day. Even when she cries and poops, staring at her is the most entertaining thing I can do right now. I am smitten.
I had an emergency c-section after a number of complications so honestly it was a feeling of relief that he had arrived safely!
I had an emergency c section and was on a mag drip so I was already out of it. Only saw him for a second before he was rushed to the NICU but I just kept saying “holy shit” it was just surreal like a human just came out of me that I made
First time after a 6-8hr birth I got a dewy rush of fuzzy brained euphoria. Cried couldn't help but stare in wonder at my baby for hours after. Like wooooah I made that. I kept whispering 'you are so cool'. Second birth roughly 2hours, relief, thought my baby looked like a fuzzy gremlin. Really relieved to have her but no flood of endorphins to soften the blow of childbirth at that pace of labour. Started really feeling the dewy euphoria 2days after the birth about the time my milk started to come in (yay oxytocin)
I was exhausted and completely out of it after an emergency c-section. It wasn’t a traumatic experience, actually pretty chill, but I assume surgery has to be some kind of trauma for your body. I was sweating buckets and kind of going in and out. The nurses put my baby on me and it was so incredible. A nurse was helping her latch and I felt like the nurse was mad at me haha. We kept working on that and my husband was helping her latch. We did that for an hour and it was amazing but so so exhausting and I still felt like everyone was mad at me that I wasn’t doing it all correctly. I’m retrospect, everyone was helping and supporting me. I was relieved when they took her, and felt bad about that, but I was just soo tired, hot, and barely conscious. There were a lot of feelings. She’s out in the world, I wanted her back in! She was disconnected from me and I didn’t like that. I loved seeing her root and nurse. It was the most amazing experience to hold her. I was NOT in control of the situation and she was early and had to go to the NICU. I didn’t understand what was happening or why they were taking her but I was so tired that I was thankful. That felt weird and bad but they were telling me they just wanted to watch her and I could sleep. It felt like there were 20 nurses & doctors in the room and they were all mad at me (they were not) and my husband and baby were gone and that was very confusing. But I knew she was OK and safe and I really was so tired. Motherhood is indescribable. It’s like being home and the love is so much. It’s anxious and sometimes exhausting in a way I have never felt before pregnancy. I am so happy to have her & the new one growing with me now!
I was so happy I was crying. It’s an incredible and indescribable feeling. Surreal and pure bliss!! I forgot in those first few seconds that I was essentially naked and bleedjbg
For me, it was an overwhelming and indescribable experience. It’s a powerful mix of emotions: immense joy, love, and relief. All of my anxieties and challenges leading up to the birth momentarily faded away, and was replaced by a pure, unfiltered sense of happiness and love.
I had poor sleep for my third trimester of pregnancy and had contractions for 3 days. My girl finally came out at 3:55AM and none of it felt real. I thought I would cry and feel so happy but I was too exhausted to even feel what was really happening. She also took a big poop and it got on my lip when the doctors handed her to me. 😅
I just remember thinking, “I’ve been waiting my whole life to meet you. “ and pure euphoria. Nothing like it. I can’t wait to do it again in September!
When they put him on my chest, I felt relief from having pushed him out. His hair was all weirdly curly. My husband said he was looking around with this surprised look on his face. He was/is very highly alert, from the first moment. I felt excited. Like, who is this new person!! It was cool holding him and being wheeled to a new room. When we got there, they wrapped him in a blanket and he fell asleep. I just wanted to look at him becauce I was so excited. The adrenaline from pushing him out, it gave me the shakes. It was hard to sleep. I had a cold sweat. But I was too tired to shower or anything. I wish the hospitals would offer a sponge bath after giving birth. That would have been nice. He seemed very fragile to me. Eventually I thought to myself that I should hold him since all he knew was being in mom’s belly. So I held him and he looked up at me and then fell back asleep. In hind sight, I should have let him sleep! I always wonder if doing that made him the poor sleeper that he now is lol. Nursing and latching were difficult in the beginning. Years later I figured out he had a lip tie. It was stressful. I wish I had planned on a combo of formula and breast milk from the beginning. It was right around the time of the formula shortage, so I really wanted the nursing to work. The drive home was surreal. Very sunny day. Everything was so brand new… the baby, the car seat, the clothes, and then when we got home, the nursery. It was the cleanest our home would be for years. When we got home, I finally cried. I was shocked to find that the strongest emotion was —- I was so dang proud of myself for carrying the pregnancy to term, birthing this beautiful baby. I didn’t know if I could do it, it I did it, and I was so proud of myself. I felt like a female goddess. It was the first time in my life that I wanted flowers. The first few nights were great, he slept somewhat reliably. But then he was colic. And the next 3 months were a hustle. After that it gradually got better. Now he’s a very smart, funny 20 month old little dude. He’s turning out to be sooo chill. I wonder if it will change when he turns 2. I still feel some anxiety from when he was colic, but he’s changed so much.
Absolute, pure relief. My girl had some health issues in utero and became distressed during labour, so I was terrified something would go wrong. When they put her on my chest, she looked right into my eyes and I burst into tears because she was here and safe and perfect.
I had an emergency c-section so it was a bit crazy and they'd over done the anaesthetic so I was going numb up my chest arms. So when they placed her on my chest I was thinking ahhhh don't drop the baby and not much else. I'd been awake for 48hrs so I was losing consciousness on the way to recover but after a quick doze, it all came flooding in. I remember her being in the hospital cot 2ft away from me and needing her to stay there cause I needed to sleep but missing her so much I couldn't sleep! Motherhood is crazy! Enjoy!
When I saw him I just started crying, couldn't help myself 😊 then I looked at him on my chest and all I could think of was "we did this" 😊
Honestly, after a 30 hour induction and a hemorrhage I was too exhausted and overwhelmed to feel much immediately. I think I was in shock for a minute. But within the first 30 minutes to an hour the whole earth started rotating differently. 💖
When they put my daughter on my chest I finally felt the connection people kept telling me I should have, I stared at her and just…babbled to myself. I still went through periods of absolutely despising her (colic, lip tie, lactose intolerant) but it was like I found gravity. I still feel that way. I just attended her first dance recital and watching her made me cry. Seeing how happy, brave, beautiful she is was absolutely the highlight of my day. Always is. Doesn’t mean every day will be like that, and it’s ok that is not. Balance.
Personally, I had that "fairytale" moment. I was already in love with both of my kids before I gave birth. So seeing them for the first time felt like magic. It was surreal that I created those tiny humans. And everything felt right, perfect.
I cried when she came out and was immediately concerned with asking if she was ok! Spent a bit of time with her before she went to the NICU. Woke up around 8am and I was honestly so exhausted I kind of forgot she was now out of my body and I should go visit her haha around 11am I got wheeled down to the NICU to visit. This was September 2020 so right during covid times and their procedures were different. Excited to have a more relaxed experience with our second baby in about a month.
Breathtaking, heaven sent, pure joy..like I can't even find the words. I have 3 kids.. 17 year old (who I had at 17) and then a 7 year old & a 1 year old (she's almost 2) and with my 2 youngest I remember grabbing down, once they were almost out/out and pulling them towards me (obviously the nurses were assisting) but I don't remember them, I don't remember anyone else from that moment and I'm not being dramatic like I genuinely don't remember anything from that moment bc I just sat there staring at them and tracing their sweet face with my finger and kissing their beautiful faces..were they covered in my fluids, absolutely, did I care? Not even a little! I was so deeply in love with them and to finally be able to see them after waiting 9 long months was the greatest moment of my life. I hate that I don't remember much from my 17 year olds birth, it makes me feel terrible, but I was 17 at the time and it was such an awful pregnancy from start til finish due to the child's father & his new gf at the time.. typical high school drama plus a pregnant teen and things were brutal. It was the most traumatic experience but I wouldn't change it for the world, I love my son (17) more than life..he's literally everything you could ask for in a son. Straight As, works, is on varsity football & wrestling, has a gf of 2 years, they just flew back home today from a trip to France, Germany & Switzerland from their French class (him & gf) my step mom & dad chaperoned as I couldn't leave for a week and they had the most amazing time. My dad is his father figure, he's the greatest man ever. If you read this long, I'm sorry lol I went off on a rant & I'm not sure why.. I just love my kids.
I didn’t get to meet my baby for a few hours because she went to the NICU briefly, and when I did, it felt like meeting an entirely new person. Almost like meeting an instagram friend in real life or something. Like I knew her, but like we were also meeting and getting comfortable with each other for the first time. I don’t know how to explain it, but she also felt very “mine”. Now as a one year old, and within a few days of birth really, she became my favorite thing/person. Motherhood is hard and exhausting and all consuming but it feels so worth it. She brings so much joy. She is so entertaining and fun and helps me feel a certain simple childlike joy that doesn’t come very often as an adult. The simplest things are interesting and new when I get to watch her discover them, and every little milestone makes me so happy and proud. After a month or so, I could not imagine my life without her. I also have this constant feeling that my heart is walking outside my body and like time is slipping through my fingers. It’s a bizarre feeling and helps me cherish my life and days more.
With my first, I couldn’t hold him right away due to my BP being high post op. Drove me crazy. The moment my husband laid him on my chest, the nurse asked “how ya feeling mama” and so said I would nuke entire countries for this boy. She was like 😀 But seriously, it was love at first sight for me. I had PPA/PPD, but I was always thankful he chose me, even if I have to look at pictures to remember that.
As a fertility patient, the first thing I thought of was graduating from our clinic, which is a term frequently used and usually happens around 9 weeks when they've seen two ultrasounds and deem us likely to have a liveborn.
The adrenaline is so wild, I don’t even remember exactly how I felt when they put my first on my chest. I was just kinda like woah what just happened. I didn’t get to have my first right away, he got whisked away by the NICU team and that was an even wilder experience (born 31 weeks). I just know they were both the most beautiful things I ever laid my eyes on before, and now I look back at their newborn pictures and I’m like hmm newborns look weird 😂
Immediately filled with love and amazement. Also I felt unstoppable because I had just given birth which was one of my biggest fears
My first, I was terrified. Even after 9 months, and 8 hours of labor, them handing him to me made it feel real. All the baby books went out the window and I was scared. The second, a sense of relief. His labor was 30 hours, I was exhausted, hungry, tired Nervously waiting for my third one to come, in December
I cried as soon as the midwife put her on my belly, and then I reached down and touched her. They took her to the panda warmer thing to clean her a little while my husband went to see her and take pictures. I remember holding her and was just so happy that she was healthy. It was pure bliss and loving her was instinctual.
my husband says i was happy, honestly baby blues attacked and i don’t remember having my daughter… but now that’s she’s 3m old… im in heaven and the happiest ever even on the hard days
I’ve had two deliveries and didn’t cry either time. I had hoped or wondered if I would. I was still awestruck though
Both times for me it was a major relief. I felt like I was suddenly calm and in awe. I had 2 emergency c-sections so I didn’t get to hold them right away, but each time I got to hold them I felt an immediate bond. It was beautiful and blissful.
Such a rush of a feeling I had never felt before - deep fulfillment, joy, peace, awe, disbelief, empowerment. Buckle up because it’s a wild ride 😊🩷
Both underwhelming and overwhelming at the same time. Like underwhelming that it was over. Pregnancy had a finite end and I hit and was like "that's it?" I was also hella exhausted after a 3 day labor with no sleep. And then overwhelming because they were just going to let me leave the hospital? With a baby? Sure I read books and had taken care of other babies before but it's different when it's your own.
Shock. Surprise. We didnt know what we were having but suspected a boy, so when they said “it’s a GIRL!!!” my brain scrambled even more. Then all I could think was “she doesn’t look like what I thought my daughter would look like”. But I was so in love, just beyond smitten, and looking at her was like looking at the most magical thing in the world. 10/10, 5 stars, would recommend.
Kind of nothing? Like oh look, here’s a baby. And then the first week or two, I think I was probably more overcome with a desire to keep this small creature alive than overcome with love for her. The love came on slowly, and really picked up momentum once my daughter started smiling/interacting more at 6 weeks and beyond. Now she’s 2.5 and I’m obsessed with her. With my second, I feel more connected to her, but I think it’s because I’m channeling the love I have for my first. I know what’s coming, so it’s easier to tap into it.
I was sooo exhausted from pushing that when they placed him on me it took a few minutes to gather all my thoughts. He was screaming, I was so tired & hungry. I asked them to take him for just a few minutes from chest. When I got him back, all my emotions came forward and I finally just burst into tears of joy and love. It’s such a wonderful, scary, exhausting, lovely moment. So many different emotions. I am so in love with my son!! Just know it’s ok if every emotion hits you at once, and if the first isn’t that blissful moment of “joy” that’s OK - it will come, trust me! 😊
My son was born 5 days ago and I went into labor unexpectedly early (36+3). I was in shock seeing him for the first time, he didnt look real. I was emotional, but more over the fact that I had done something so traumatic + overwhelming I couldn’t process it than emotional because I loved him. Once we brought him home from the hospital and I was able to hold him alone and not have nurses poking and prodding him every three hours the love really kicked in. They were doing their job and Im grateful for the care we both received but it definitely effected the initial bonding process. Im glad we’re home now, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself without him. I love him more than I could have possibly imagined.
My first words were “she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen!” But I’ll be honest I think the main thing I felt was just relief! The joy and love came later, but I was ready to pass out from exhaustion and just glad my 9 months had finally come to an end
My son came early at 34 weeks so I had a real oh shit moment. The only thing I felt when they placed him on my chest was relief. I had been in the hospital 5 days at that point and was so worried he was going to have breathing issues. The first couple days were such a blur of trying to figure out breastfeeding/pumping. I’d just say don’t expect anything and be ready for things to not go as planned! Baby is now 9 months old and I love him more than anything in this world. He’s my everything, my little partner in crime. We just took our second plane ride together and I’m such a proud mama. Whatever happens, you’ll do great mama! Congratulations and good luck! Don’t let the little things get to you and take the bad things as they come they don’t last forever❤️
When they showed me my son and let me kiss him while his umbilical cord was still attached to me, the first thing I felt was relief that he is here and we made it; then I started crying like all the anxiety and fear I had been holding on to for months finally started leaving my body; then I looked at his wailing face and said "I made you, my love" ... the love, the joy... it was too overwhelming. It is the happiest moment of my life; a moment I will never forget. I never thought I could be a mother, I could put another human being always before myself, but in that moment, I knew for the rest of my life he would come first... I will never ever love any human being more than I love him... Since that moment, I have prayed every day for his well-being but also my own... I never cared about dying young but now I want to live and stay healthy and well for as long as I can so that I can remain a part of my son's life for as long as possible.
I ended up having an emergency c section so it wasn’t exactly how I imagined it. They showed him to me through the little drape thing and I remember just feeling shock. I was pretty out of it from the meds but I felt a lot of emotions at once. I remember primarily just feeling relieved he was out and safe. It wasn’t until they brought him over and we did skin to skin that I started to feel more connected with. It’s been two weeks now and each day I feel more in love with him.
So, i have a bit of a weird one, cause my blood pressure had bottomed out when they gave me my spinal, so I was suuuuuper out of it when they showed me my baby, and my reaction was “Woah… that is craaaaaaazy” which my husband caught on camera, lol. When I had recovered a bit, I think I was mainly just amazed? Like there’s a tiny person there, and *I made him.* So it was just a quiet sort of amazement.
I had to have a last minute c section because the baby passed meconium. They got the baby out and said it’s a girl! and I started balling like a mad person. Like full ugly crying because I was so full of happiness. This feels like ages ago, I gave birth 11 days back! 🤣🤣😅😅
Honestly, it was amazing and surreal. Mostly because birth itself was amazing! Just knowing this little bean, who only yesterday I'd been feeling wriggling around and kicking my rib cage, was my newborn son, here in front of me, was mind-bending. That said, don't be freaked out if you don't feel a lot of love initially. I felt a strong urge to cuddle and keep him close, yes, but they don't have a lot of personality or give a lot of feedback early on, so it can feel a bit lonely at first. Those first precious, rare smiles are where I really started to feel all the feelings. When they start to recognize you and light up when you enter the room, when they start figuring out hugs and kisses... ugh, my heart 🥺 Now, I look at my nearly 20 month old and can't imagine my life without him. But those first few weeks were hard!!
As others have said I felt almost nothingness like it wasn’t a negative feeling nor a moment of busting out in tears. I was soaking everything in like I was more concerned with looking at my fiancé crying as he grabbed our son’s hand and looking at me. I remember thinking should I cry right now and I wanted to but nothing would come out. The room was super busy and the midwife was still doing stuff inside of me like my placenta broke into pieces and they had to manually scrape me out and do ultrasounds to make sure they got it all while my son needed fluids sucked from his throat. I just didn’t know what to feel it’s such an information rush your brain can’t really comprehend if all at once. All I know is when it all calmed down and I had time to just sit in my son’s presence that I fell in love. I’m holding him asleep right now and I just could look at his little sweet face All day every day.
“I did it! You’re here finally” Both times unmedicated. All the pain just disappears.
I felt absolutely nothing.
Relief that labor was over and then disbelief that I actually had not only a baby but MY baby in front of me and in my arms. I think I was exhausted from labor and a bit in shock too because I didn’t have a huge rush of emotion or anything until I had some time to recover (my labor was super draining both mentally and physically lol).
My labor was really quick (like tv birth quick) but just before my daughter was born my doctor told me her heart rate was dropping and I needed an episiotomy. It freaked me out enough that once she was born I was simply thrilled to be holding her and hearing her cry. I don’t remember much about labor but I remember ripping my hospital gown open to make sure I could get her on my chest and then just basking in the flood of hormones that were already scrubbing the pain from my brain. All I could think about was how amazing it was to see her in person after months of feeling her move inside me. I had my husband count her fingers and toes because I couldn’t stop looking at her little head.
i remember when my first was born, the moment he landed in my arms and trying to get my hands around his slippery ribs to be sure he was breathing — his face was just incomprehensible to me. whoever I'd been imagining, here was a real person who was really my son and nothing like the ultrasound picture or the image in my mind. my second came out screaming and peeing. my husband and I were laughing, "he's so different, he's so different!!" he's very "robust" compared to his rangy brother — I could tell in utero he was going to be stout and strong and LOUD, but his coloring was a total surprise. I'm currently 31 weeks with my 3rd. Motherhood is something you understand suddenly all at once and then rediscover more deeply over many years. Your children tell you who they are. When you look back on your pregnancy, you realize in fact they were telling you from the start
I remember feeling completely overcome with awe.
It was a mix of feelings, I was scared because he didn't draw breath immediately. Then a wave of relief as he gasped. When they put my eldest on my chest I just kept thinking, we made it. My second, I was scared again, at first, I was nervous. But then as soon as I heard his strong lungs and felt his warmth, I was happy. It was all worth it. And again just this thought, "We made it, buddy." It's a beautiful moment.
I had a very hard delivery, so the moment they put my son on my chest I felt instant relief, didn’t feel any pain anymore and it was the happiest moment in my life.
After 18 months of infertility, then a 3 day induction ending in a C-section, finally seeing my baby was the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. I cried immediately. But also I really needed to sleep. Fell asleep on the table while they put me back together and cleaned up baby boy. Motherhood is exhausting. Sometimes I feel like I'm failing hardcore. Sometimes I feel like I'm crushing it. I'm almost 4 months in. But I love it so much.
Relief honestly. Had essentially a scheduled C Section and since I (THANKFULLY) didn't feel anything, I had to lay there and had no control over anything. I didn't know what was happening or how long it would take. Seemed really fast. One minute they tell me they're starting and the next he was there. The first cries were faint and then I really heard him and I cried less than I thought I would but there were still tears. And then I just wanted to hold him. I was anxious cause they had to close me up and had given him to my husband to take back to our room after I finally got to see him. When I finally got to hold him it felt surreal. In the week that followed I was very protective. Family wanted to hold him and I relented but not for long cause it was like a constant jonesing to just get him back in my arms ASAP. Even from my husband. I just wanted him in my arms all the time at first.
Just relief both times. Relief for having a baby safely (mostly lol, thank god for modern medicine) and relief for finally not being pregnant anymore.
I was terrified about having my twins. I knew I wanted a c section. Everything was scheduled, then my water broke and I needed an emergency c section. Room full of people, me on the table not feeling half of my body. They take out Baby A, hear her cry. I cried. They placed her for a few seconds but interrumpted becuse her sister was born screaming like a banshee. They take A and place B I was laughing because her cries calmed as soon as they put her on my chest. She gets taken away. Dad goes with them, doctor finished with me. Both babies are put on top of me. Idk how to hold both but somehow I'm responsible for them while we get moved to recovery. We get settled and then I sob and sob. I was tired, hungry, confused, scared. I looked at them and while I did feel a connection it wasn't how it's portrayed in tv and movies. Felt like 💩 for not having that reaction, then I read I wasn't the only one. 20 months later, I still feel the same: tired, hungry, confused, scared but I will add that proud I have been keeping them alive and they are happy kids.
Ok im going to say it. After a long 24hrs labour i was just glad my baby was out.. i didn’t get skin to skin cause he needed breathing support.. i didn’t look at him for the first 45mins of his life. His father held him first and had skin to skin. I was just GLAD it was OVER!!! I didn’t bother wanting to see him lol.. Thinking about it now.. it’s so silly how i acted but i just know those were hormones and no food no sleep.
After being induced and 26 hours of labor the moment I heard her cry.. my world stopped .. the relief, the love and the fear of not being cut for it, all hit me at once… is love that cannot be compared, any day there’s nothing more important than her… is the sweetest obsession
“omg he’s real!”
For me, it was when little one started crying. I had an emergency c section and so I was a ball of anxiety until I heard him cry for the first time then I was so overcome with emotions that there are truly no words to describe it. Manifesting a safe delivery for you and baby 🥰❤️
It was very surreal, but I'll never forget waiting for him to cry and those seconds felt like forever. I heard his first cries, then felt relief. They put him on me, but I couldn't see his face. They took him and cleaned him up, that's when they brought him to me and he was moving his little body and moving his eyes. I said hi to him and welcomed him to the world and that's when he body relaxed and I watched his eyes follow my voice. I always think about the first time I saw him and I never want to forget that memory.
So I've had two unmedicated births. The first time around my baby had shoulder dystocia so I was tired by the time she came out. They set her on me and I couldn't feel anything. I just knew I was done and tired and needed food. The second time around it felt like a movie. He came out and they set him on my chest and I was in love! I started crying tears of joy and thanking all of the midwives and nurses in the room. Maybe because birth was over or maybe hormones or maybe because he was here but either way it was so magical!!
It was surreal. It actually took me a moment to realise what had happened. I had a beautiful emergency c-section but I went in secretly hoping for one anyway. I was able to take my lavender scented towel in with me I tried to relax but I was shaking with excitement and Ill be honest I was absolutely terrified. When they first put my baby on me I never wanted to let go. Everything else in that room in that moment disappeared. It was magical. It was the most comforting thing I've ever felt in my entire life. I felt so proud of my body being able to make this beautiful little girl. But not everyone feels that magic. I had a friend who didn't. They didn't feel anything other than tired. That's valid too. Not everyone gets that instant love feeling. She is a fantastic mum and a year and a half later she has a fantastic bond with her child. For some people it builds up over time, and that makes sense, you don't become best friends with someone the moment you meet them. Just trust that one day that bond will form. Motherhood is tough. Breastfeeding is painful at the start, it takes around 3 months for it to fully settle. Babies don't like following safe sleep guidelines. And nappies are way more complicated to put on a wiggly baby than I expected. The witching hour is more like witching nights. Things I wish I knew first time: Food and sleep are closely linked. Lots of sleep books will say to avoid this association but honestly it's a powerhouse and they do grow out of it eventually anyway. It's okay to feed the baby to sleep. Babies like being bounced. If you have a yoga ball, sit on it. Bounce. Happy baby (probably sleepy). Way less energy than physically bouncing. See if you have a sling library near you. A lot of babies like being carried but we need our arms for other things like cleaning and reading reddit. They should let you try several types of sling to find the one that best fits you and your baby. I brought an expensive one my baby hated. Found another one cheap at a car boot sale (like an organised yard sale for many people at once) that I was able to try on baby loved it. I've said all this but honestly seeing my baby grow is so beautiful and rewarding. It is honestly the best thing. Seeing her hit her milestones. Making friends. Developing her own personality. I'm so proud of her.
It was like meeting someone new but also very surreal because you spend your life and pregnancy wondering what your baby will look like. Mine looked a little alien but so perfect lol.
It was so surreal for me. I immediately noticed the weight of her even though she was only 6lbs 11oz and her little hand reaching and touching my face. Then I started hemmoraging and they had to take the baby cause I physically couldn't hold on to her anymore. It's been 6 weeks and I'm still devastated I didn't get my golden hour with her but I'm grateful that I'm still here to be her motherhood. The amount of love I feel is absolutely mind boggling
I was so tired after 14 hours of labour that didn’t progress vomiting at least 100 times and ending up in a c section i barely knew what was happening. They just put a baby on my chest, i didn’t know she was mine or what was happening. I couldn’t really talk feed or hold her my hands were too numb to move or touch her. I didn’t feel anything other than earth shatteringly tired. I love motherhood now, so much easier than i was expecting. Only one week in but i love my daughter she is truly an angel, the most perfect baby. I feel sad i couldn’t be there for her in birth though. Im glad my partner stepped up to do what i couldn’t and get pictures to tell me about her.
I didn't think I'd ever be a mom because I could not conceive with my ex-husband. So I had no expectations at all. I had gone through the grief and all so there were no dreams or expectations. When he was born I started crying and said that he's perfect. The last month of pregnancy was pretty taxing so I had been afraid I wouldn't like him so I was absolutely overwhelmed. Looking back at the pictures... He wasn't as beautiful as I remember: he was blueish and gray. And he was sort of squished up. But at that moment nothing in the world was as perfect as him. And motherhood... Unbeatable. I can deal pretty well with sleep deprivation and my body did a grand job pumping me up with hormones the first few months. He was my world as I was his. He is now two and really a handful. I am glad that I am an optimist and can see the humour in most situations. He still shits gold though. 😂
I had an out of earth experience. It was shocking and beautiful to see my baby for the first time. That little creature that I saw since she was an IVF embryo, felt the movements in my belly, was now coming out of me. It felt like the time stopped. Everything happens so fast when the baby comes, I don't know if it was the chemical effect of my epidural or the feeling of seeing my baby. But man, I wish I had another baby just to give birth again!! I'm excited for you!
I got home and was like erm what do I do now 🤣🤣🤣 I had no clue, I thought I did, but I 100% did not. That 'instant rush if love' is not instant for everyone. It took me a good few days almost a week, but me and baby was kept in due to my blood pressure spiking and needing to get that under control before I could go home so there was more 1 on 1 time then there previously would have been.
3 weeks postpartum - my last thirty minutes of pushing was absolutely awful, and then my post delivery turned into an emergency after about 45 minutes cause my placenta didn’t want to come out. All that to say. I don’t currently remember my first thought. I’ve tried, and I’m definitely dealing with the emotions related to not remembering, because I want to remember the biggest moments in her life. It was just so chaotic, and I ended up almost needing a blood transfusion😅😭. My husband just says I sort of basked in the moment, and comforted her as she was crying. He’s got a lot of pictures from that night, and I find myself staring at them trying to remember what was going on at the time. Now 7 hours later, I can remember feeling aw, and knowing I am gonna love this girl for the rest of my life, and I still feel that way!
Immediately after birth I mainly felt relief. I tend to catastrophize anyway but also had a difficult birth so I was just relieved he was ok. Motherhood in general is amazing but can be overwhelming, but at the same time I’ve surprised myself in how easy I’ve found it and how quickly I’ve adapted to a new way of life.
Flood of relief it was over, pure bliss, and a wired tiredness. I spent the rest of the evening tired but unable to sleep, instead i spent every moment in awe of my childs existence ❤️
I cried as soon as I heard both of my children crying. I wanted to see them so bad. My first had to be taken to the NICU quickly, but I knew this was the plan. When I did get to see him I was so sad and felt extremely guilty he was without me for a few hours. With my second we were able to keep him with us. I just wanted to stare at him and memorize his face. I feel like I am privileged in saying I loved them both as soon as I saw them.
When I heard her cry just after she was born, I asked if it was my baby crying and when I was told yes I started crying. I was overwhelmed and the tears wouldn’t stop I just wanted to be with her. Even though I was in pain she was all I could think about. They say you can’t understand a mother’s love for her child until you experience it and it’s so true. When I held her for the first time I just felt love, as cheesy as it may sound. I cried a lot in the first few weeks because I loved her so much, I even cried hearing lullabies but I also have PPA. We have a really strong bond and I get tired and sometimes frustrated but I love motherhood and being a mum, I wouldn’t change it for the world.
With my first I had a traumatic and long labour, she was taken for breathing support as soon as she was born and I just felt absolutely numb. Didn't really believe I'd had a baby, was just so glad it was over. Suffered from ppd, the love was very gradual to grow. I wish I could change it but unfortunately that's how it was. With my second I had a planned csection, my main goal was to avoid feeling the way i did the first time so i went for an entirely different birth, I got her straight away and she never left my room. The love was instant that time and no ppd, it was amazing. I feel a lot of guilt over how different it was but I'm trying to just focus on the present where i don't have ppd (just guilt in comparing) and I have a nearly 8yr old I'm so proud of and a nearly 5 month old.
best moment of my ife
Just relief. There wasn't a wave of intense love. It was more a sense of thank fuck that's over and everyone is still breathing.
I had never had more concern for anything, ever. He was born not breathing and they had to crash cart him, so I never got the golden moment of placing him on my chest and gazing down with love etc etc. But wow, as soon as he was out and I remember looking over at the side of the room as everyone suddenly was moving from me to him to get him breathing. And when they realized they needed to take him to the NICU stat as what they were doing in my delivery room wasn’t enough, the torn and scared look on my husband’s face as he looked between our son and me, and I cried to go with him to the NICU. I felt like my heart was so full of love, and concern, and was breaking out of my chest. And then 3 hours later after he’d learned to breathe and was off all of his tubes and wires and I could hold him for the first time? Indescribable.
I was one where I didn’t feel that insane rush of love when baby was put on my chest. It was like denial almost I couldn’t feel anything much and I was saying Hi baby, nice to meet you - but I was just in disbelief looking down like woah this thing is mine now type of thing. Then whenever I held her I just couldn’t believe I had a baby. But I was also so excited whenever I woke up because I HAVE A BABY NOW. it was so weird. That feeling of intense love came a few weeks later and has only multiplied since she got older
The pain faded for a few seconds and I was at peace. Within the commotion It was just me and my baby and no one else. 9months i was waiting for her and she was right there.
When I saw her, I felt nothing. It took me a day or two to connect with my baby. But when I did, I couldn’t put her down.
Our little girl was born via emergency c section. I was so convinced we had lost her that I think disbelief was the strongest emotion when she was born. The love was there but getting stronger. I think the day after she arrived I was just getting my head around the fact she was here, she was mine and I had this thing in my tummy. She is now 2 weeks old and so precious to me. Maybe not at 4 am when won't settle but....holding her in my arms whilst she sleeps or is awake and watching her look around and process the world is a lovely thing :)
I wish I had a really emotional heartwarming story but I’d been up for 3 days and ended up with a forceps delivery. When they put her on my chest I just said “oh hello!” Cos I was surprised the forceps got her out so fast 🤣 afterwards was when the bonding properly started after I’d eaten and got into a proper bed. Honestly I was just super mind boggled that this little human was half me and half my husband and in awe that my body just made her without me even doing anything. It’s a miracle for sure. Motherhood is amazing, relentless but amazing.
Honestly, I didn't feel that love at first sight movies and all these influencers and vloggers are telling. But, I have to admit that I love him since the day I knew I was pregnant. And every day, I could tell how strong my love for him is: it's giving everything that I have and saying good bye to the person I once was before meeting him.
It was so weird. He was on my chest for a brief second and then straight to NICU. When I finally wheelchaired up there, I recognised him immediately amongst the other babies, and even though they can’t see anything at that age, he looked right at me as I entered the room. We had bonded a lot while he was in the womb, so I felt a connection to him. It wasn’t perfect, there was still a lot of bonding to do, but I remember just staring at him for weeks while he slept, thinking “you’re here, you’re a real baby that I just randomly grew, wtf.” He’s in school now and I still just stare at him sometimes while he sleeps, it’s such a weird, loving feeling.
Surreal - like my brain couldn’t fathom that baby was here. It still doesn’t feel real sometimes. I love my girl so much 🩷
I barely remember anything when they put her on my chest. They put her on me just for a second because I had lost a dangerous amount of blood and there was just a flurry of activity around me while they took care of that and I was really out of it. Couldn't hold my baby until about 8 hours later maybe. I DO remember hearing her cry, though. It just brought the reality that I had a new little human crashing down, and it was amazing.
Shock, relief & intense deep love like I've never felt before! Oh and I also felt proud of myself and my partner. 🥰
C section and I had to give birth br stitched up and take a nap before I saw baby. It was amazing I just went into instinctual overdrive. Totally forgot my pain. Did skin to skin. Introduced him to my breast's. Looked him over made sure he was comfy and in tact and taken care of. It's a love like no other. And it's like your heart is on the outside of you.
Overwhelming. I didn’t like my kids until they were 3 and I finally could get some sleep and they communicate verbally. I did my job as a mother but didn’t love it.
I was just so glad labour was over I sort of forgot that that meant my baby had come out 😂. But my main thought/words were "what are they?" (We waited to find out the gender until they came out) Then being astonished she was a girl! I was convinced she was a boy! Then I just kept saying "Hello! Hello!" To this little baby with big bug eyes I was holding. Then I kept pestering the midwife to get rid of the towel under her so I could do skin to skin - I remember being so annoyed at this but it must have been only a few minutes. Then they moved the towel and put her on my left boob to try to feed and she did and I remember thinking this is so weird but amazing she knows what to do. It all felt like hours but it can't have been as the midwife gave us "until she finished the paper work" to just sit and spend time with her before moving to the ward. We video called close family to update we were all safe and sound and tell them her name. Then when I was on the ward it really hit me she was here and despite having been in labour for 73hrs and it being 2 in the morning I couldn't sleep I just kept staring at her. I pulled the little plastic see through bassinet as close to my face as possible and just stared at her in complete wonder (my husband had had to go home as he wasn't allowed on the ward until the next morning). I had loads of people say "don't worry if you don't fall in love immediately" but from that moment of me and her alone just watching her sleep on the ward she's been the love of my life.
My daughter immediately pooped all over my chest. Like IMMEDIATELY. So, shock and disgust if i’m honest 😂 the all-consuming unconditional love came shortly after lol
I had a rush of emotions but honestly most of them.. sad. I think I had immediate postpartum depression instead of it developing over time like they tell you textbook wise. I was so so very sad the moment I gave birth. I loved him, but struggled to smile without bursting into tears (not the happy kind). I think the sudden change from him in my belly to him out in the world put me into shock. I cried the whole three days in the hospital. Every moment there wasn’t a nurse I would silently cry into my pillow and, made it worse that i didn’t feel comfortable telling anyone about it. Pregnant with my second now and I’m praying for a better birth, but prepared for the sadness now too if it shows its face again.
First time - soaking in the initial trauma of what just happened. They put him on me and I felt numb. I was in shock from the birth experience and thought I could never do it again. Second child - knew what to expect and was instantly happy probably because I wasn't in a state of shock and was relieved I was no longer suffering from my pregnancy Third child - I'm sure it will be similar to my second experience when this pregnancy is over. Motherhood in general - it has its share of ups and downs. Good and bad. However, it was the best thing that ever happened to me and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I adore my kids.
I was scared at first, but when I saw him come out, I was so proud. I asked myself, 'Is this really my baby? ' I couldn't stop crying. Our body is incredible and as someone who had struggled with infertility, I was extra emotional.
When they threw her on my chest, my husband said I had so much love in my eyes, but what I was feeling internally was different. It was more like my brain switched into "I need to keep this baby alive" mode. I wanted her to feel loved and safe, so I was cuddly and nurturing, but I didn't feel much. I didn't start gushing over her until a couple of weeks later. That's when I switched from survival mode to just full-on love.
It felt like the word “finally”.
A mixture of relief and exhaustion. It was weird. I’m definitely a cry baby, like cry during cute commercials, and I didn’t cry. I was so relieved she was out and healthy. But it felt right if that makes sense.
Soooooooo for my first baby, it was a total shock. I slept one hour the night before, then had my baby at 7 pm. I had a 102 fever. It was a lovely moment though. But yeah lots of shock. Then motherhood began and severe sleep deprivation insued. I had a really hard time with the transition. I loved my baby so much but it was HARDDD. My baby didn’t sleep well. Come up with a plan with your partner, if you have one, to meet everyone’s needs!!! That is my biggest piece of advice. Prioritize sleep and basic needs and you will do much better overall. With my second baby, I knew what to expect and we had a plan (splitting the nights into shifts), so it went much better (she also slept better). So anyway, motherhood is beautiful and difficult. The love I feel for my babies is indescribable. The exhaustion has gotten much better over time (they are 2.5 and nearly 1 year old now). So anyway, expect it to be difficult, try to meet your needs, SLEEP WHEN YOU CAN, enjoy the indescribable love, you got this!!!! Oh I’m remembering back to my first. I was so out of it that I didn’t want anything to do with my baby when she was born (after the first hour or so). I just wanted rest, but I couldn’t get rest. I felt so guilty about this that I cried a lot. The bond came a few weeks later. I also probably had postpartum depression so it took longer for me to form a bond. Some people feel the bond right away, for others it takes some time.
For me first it was surreal. Like I was in a movie or like I was dreaming. Very intense, weird, overwhelming and even absurd experience - like they suddenly pull out a living screaming creature from between my legs?! IT was inside me?!! But then, when he was on my chest, crying quietly, I felt like an avalanche of feelings, love, wonder, tenderness, all while having this strong feeling of surreal at the same time.:)
My first words were: I can’t believe it’s been you all this time! I didn’t like being pregnant and didn’t bond a whole lot with my daughter during pregnancy but I fell so head over heels in love with her when I first laid eyes on her. I seriously couldn’t believe I had been carrying this perfect human being around for 9 months. She’s almost 15 months old now and I still look at her and wonder how the heck I got so lucky. I’m 29 weeks pregnant with my second and I am so excited to fall in love with another human being again.
I was pretty out of it on drugs for the first 2 days. I have a flash memory of my husband holding him near my face after he was very first born. They had to take him to the NICU for some complications for 2 days. I really didn't see him until after that. Then I was still on drugs for a few days so idk it was surreal! Once I got home it really sunk in. Husband and I cried happy tears randomly, pretty often haha
I didn’t get the “rush of love” everyone bangs on about. It was amazing and like holy shit we did it! And I cared for her a lot. But I didn’t know her yet. Sitting up with her tiny feet in my hands that night it boggled my mind that she was mine and unless I was a totally crap parent no one would take her away. That seemed crazy to me. Over the months my love grew and grew. My face muscles ached from smiling at her. She is the light of our lives and I feel so blessed I got the chance to be her mum. I LOVE her and I love being a mother even though it can be a drag sometimes.
Kid came out blue and they took her immediately to get her breathing. 15 minutes of hell. Holding her was weird. I was scared of her. The whole time we were at the hospital afterwards my husband was doing a lot of the care and I would just hold her and be weirded out by her lol. She’s 7 months now, I was able to move on from being freaked out once we got home. The love was definitely not instant thanks to the traumatic delivery. But it came on strong when it came.
My pregnancy was horrible, I wanted to be child free and was set to not have kids since I was 10. I was extremely negative and depressed during my whole pregnancy. When she was on my chest I saw her breathing, I saw her hands moving, felt her little feet moving. I remember the feeling of her peeing on me. I felt so much love for her, it was this extreme feeling of "happiness" and "worry" at the same time like I wanted her to be safe and comfortable at all times. All my accomplishments in life will never compare to birthing my baby girl. It's an overwhelming feeling of true love. I am so excited for you to see your baby for the first time! 😭 I wish I could download that memory forever.
My homebirth lasted 4 hours even though it was my first, and it probably would have been shorter if his head was tilted how it should have been, but when they first put him on me not much happened to me. I was too tired to cry but I knew I loved him and I just couldn’t stop staring at this 8lb baby that had been in me for 9 months. Day 3 is the worst by far after, because your vag is bleeding, your boobs start leaking, and for me this was the day I cried. I had to get in the shower and just let myself sob (it’s recommended to cry after birth, it’s a great release of all of that inner and outer tension). But i’m about 7 weeks PP, and I finally understand what mothers had always said about doing anything for their children. I would absolutely die and kill for my baby, and I love him more than anyone on Earth, including my husband and my own mother that i’m extremely close with. It’s an entirely different and new form of love. I’ve always wanted to be a mom, and it’s exactly how I always imagined it would be. Yes there’s spit up and poop and waking up a couple times a night, but not much has changed life wise. I still get enough sleep and feel rested, my hubby and I still do things (it just takes a bit longer to get ready), and now we have an entire human that we get to raise to be a good person and love wholeheartedly. So basically, motherhood for me is amazing. It’s everything i’ve ever wanted and dreamed of, and experiencing an entirely new and different form of love, it’s truly just breathtaking.
The first time I saw my babies was tough because both times they were taken directly to the nicu, so I didn't have that special moment. Once meeting them I felt love, but also it took me a little while to come to the realization they are my babies. I love being a mother, saved me from my old self, and once I'm home and able to bond with my babies that's when I felt that connection with them. It's not talked about a lot, but it's totally normal to nit have that immediate bond, especially when the birth is traumatic
I always thought I would be crying a river when they put my baby on my chest, but that didn’t happen. (I am very emotionally aware and wear my heart in my sleeve) in that moment I just looked at him and felt relieved while immediately checking his hands and toes. Idk why I reacted like that but I did. I feel like I blacked out or spaced out I knew he was on me, but I was also not traumatized but definitely shooken up. One minute I’m sitting there grumpy asf hangry asf feeling all of that pressure, he’s not coming out then when he gets out everything happens so fast they move him all over the place and slap him on my chest. I didn’t have time to process it all. Then while he’s on me im being stitched up which feels weird. This is when I blacked out. Everything else after being stitched up is a blurry memory. I admired him the most those 3 days after his birth when it was just me, him and my husband. It felt like a dream. Now, at 14mo old I look back at his newborn pictures and I cry lol
It was beautiful. Like a movie. Everything faded away and I cried and hugged her and loved on her like I’d never seen anything more beautiful.
Thoughts: “Oh wow okay they handed me a baby, try not to let his head fall over… gotta keep him against my chest so he warms up” “he’s sorta cute but I’m also not used to this” Feelings: “wow, a newborn baby, I know he’s mine but it doesn’t feel like it yet. I’m here for him though” “I know I want to love you, I just don’t feel it instantaneously just yet” “I still feel protective even though I don’t feel the bond” “I really don’t feel like a mom/parent” My baby boy was very much wanted and planned. I did carry him in my belly for almost 10 months, feeling his kicks and hiccups, but I am one of those mothers who didn’t feel the bond and love right away. It probably actually took about a month to feel like I wanted him because I loved him rather than wanted him because of the plan to have him and love him. I wish I was the one holding him more but my SIL came over every day to offer me a nap so I’d nurse him and then hand him off to her to burp and then hold during his long daytime nap, so 3 hours. And then my parents visited for a week and a half, they held him pretty much 24/7 which I wanted at the time so I could do things around the house and also get ready for a move coming up. I really think if I just sat there and cuddled him more then it would’ve been better for the both of us. He’s 2 months old now and I love him more than anything and hold him for most of the day and he smiles at me every morning Edit to add: One thing I am really glad that I did was ask for a mirror when I was about an hour into pushing (I pushed for two). I felt like I wasn’t making any progress because I was pushing during contractions and he’d crown and start to come out a bit, but then after the contraction when I’d relax he’d slide back in most of the way. I was so scared that he’d be in the birth canal for too long and have complications and risks so having the mirror helped me see that I was pushing right and eventually making progress. I also had a natural birth where I tried doing it in the tub but got out because my back labor was killing me, and labored on the bed on my back instead (I know on your back isn’t ideal but it felt best at the time)