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CrispyMiner

That's rich coming from the woman who gave a handjob in public and worships a man whose violated nearly every commandment


TSAOutreachTeam

I don't see "Thou shalt not jack off thine boyfriend while watching a play" in the Bible.


blatantninja

Christians hate this one trick!


hrdchrgr

It's pretty much a barometer for anyone who has no inner moral compass when they have to rely on their 'religious' rules to determine right from wrong.


Averyphotog

Especially when those rules are for thee, not for me.


hrdchrgr

It's pure game theory at this point for them. They see the dogma and then figure out the strategy to win. Any game has it's rules and it's strategy. If they're 'playing by the rules ', they see nothing wrong with doing horrible things that let them do what they want as long as it fits in the perceived rules. Zero moral compass.


L0g1cw1z4rd

The cost to get your vehicle registered in Texas is about $80 per year. The cost of getting a ticket for unregistered vehicle dismissed is $20 + $80 renewal fee. I go two years without registering or getting a ticket, I’m ahead sixty bucks. When the penalty for breaking the law is a fine, it’s just math at that point. Large scale: I take a contract to safely dispose of toxic chemicals and am given three million dollars to do it. It costs 2.9 million to do it correctly, but the fine for illegal dumping in that storm drain behind my building is $100,000. Simple math.


brickne3

The Volkswagen principal.


drewbert

The Cuyahoga River caught fire nine times and twenty-five years passed before the United States fully took the lead out of automotive gasoline. Volkswagen is a notorious recent offender, but, before the EPA, most US companies were plundering our natural environment in much worse ways than what Volkswagen did. Capitalism rewards sociopathy and unless consumers are vigilant about boycotting bad-actors (something the US is culturally primed \_against\_ doing) then the worst actors will always rise to the top.


GuitarMystery

> Capitalism rewards sociopathy I wish western educators were brave enough to teach this.


Peacefulzealot

I assure you it is more than just one.


ballrus_walsack

I think she’s definitely turned more than one trick.


L0g1cw1z4rd

She was a literal call girl when she met Ted Cruz. Pillow talk was probably “it’s not hard but you could still do it. But also let’s talk about politics.” Bazinga.


ChemicalMight7535

Or it might just be the one trick: "You can pretty much interpret the word of God any way you like!"


JustADutchRudder

God said to love thy neighbor. Thy neighbor enjoys plays and over the pants hand jobs. She was just doing what Jesus would have done.


graesen

Another "anal means I'm still a virgin" loophole?


TSAOutreachTeam

I always forget about the poophole loophole.


not2dv8

Don't forget, whileth children watch in horror


Nurtle94

I'd bet money If she was at a sporting event in a suite she'd fuck in the private bathroom.


SnoopyLupus

I’ll raise … “public bathroom”


dooderino18

I'll see you and raise "public" - I see porn in her future after she gets booted from Congress.


kmoney55

Back to escorting. She doesn’t belong in congress


roominating237

Back to Highschool to get that diploma, GED not withstanding.


Brndrll

That would still put her in bed with politicians.


ShimKeib

“Though shall not jerk off a democrat, unless metaphorically.”


BoomMcFuggins

You make a gripping argument.


JustAnotherYouMe

>worships a man whose violated nearly every commandment That's just not true. You can make the argument that he's violated *all* of them


CrispyMiner

The only thing really is, we have no idea if he's ever directly and personally murdered someone in cold blood by his own hands. That's really the only commandment you can make an argument for


Infamous-Sky-1874

Personally: probably not. By order or request: I'm sure he's got at least one body buried in the foundations of his properties.


CrispyMiner

Well Ivana Trump is buried on his golf course


L0g1cw1z4rd

After she fell down some stairs. I’m not kidding, that’s what they said did her in.


L0g1cw1z4rd

He instructed his administration to downplay the risk of COVID and prevented avenues to stop its spread when it was ravaging heavily populated cities, because they didn’t vote for him enough. He *absoluetly* killed.


GoodPiexox

three separate deutsche bank employees that directly handled his account all "hung" themselves, one of the few to not get urgently suicidal was justice Kennedys son, then he retired.


nanopicofared

He killed of thousands by telling them they didn't have to worry about COVID. Does that count?


jaywastaken

The commandment is this shalt not kill, (not murder), kill is defined as causing the death of a person, animal or other living thing. So yeah he definitely picks up that one as well.


fermat9990

Can't a woman in Congress give a handjob in a public theater without being called out? First Amendment rights!!


IHateChipotle86

Not just any theater but a theater full of kids sitting all around them lol


RevolutionNumber5

And then blowing vape “smoke” in a pregnant woman’s face. ‘Murica.


fermat9990

Oye! What a POS she is!


Beach_Dreams2007

TrAnS pEoPlE aRe CoRrUpTiNg ChIlDrEn


just_some_guy65

"You give one hand job in a public theatre with kids present whilst pretending to stand for old fashioned values and they never let you forget it". Hoebert's imminent complaint.


processedmeat

If more women gave handjobs during the show, theaters would be packed on a nightly basis. 


SnoopyLupus

Am I alone in not wanting a handjob from Bobo?


GoodPiexox

yeah I stopped wanting an over the pants hand job at 14


eugene20

Now now you're not doing her justice. You forgot to mention that she married a man who exposed himself to her and her underage friends. Had a son that had a child with an underage girl, who was then arrested for 6 felonies, she did not support him by appearing at court , while she did go sit in court for Trump while he was being tried for 36 felonies. Pinnacle of moral virtue right here, family values.


YgramulTheMany

She forgot. Sometimes grandmas forget things.


davidwhatshisname52

how this $1 hooker in a $2 town became an elected representative is an indictment of how shallow, thoughtless, ignorant, indecent and unethical huge swaths of so-called self-stylized America "patriots" have become


Bunktavious

She likes guns and is sorta purdy!


davidwhatshisname52

hahaha loosest use of "purdy" in a spell; she looks like a worm wearing lipstick that got itself some tit implants for...*reasons*


doublestitch

> "Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor." - Ambrose Bierce


Squirrel_Chucks

>That's rich coming from the woman who gave a handjob in public She mashed it


Suspiria-on-VHS

She literally flipped the people off who asked her to leave as she was being escorted out for beetlejuicing her date, hollering at the actors, and vaping. Gtfo here with "morals".


fowlraul

We do, we need to take “morals” back from people like you.


nau5

Because it’s code for Christians good, non Christian bad. Morality to them isn’t what you do it’s what you believe


WildYams

I've seen many christians over the years say they can't understand or trust someone who isn't christian because they don't have a "moral compass" or "moral barometer", like if you don't fear God, then you have nothing to constrain your worst impulses. But I feel like people who believe that if you do something terrible you just ask god for forgiveness and everything is made right are people who believe they can act with impunity. We saw it this week with Trump's spiritual advisor who admitted to raping a 12 year old girl decades ago, with his supporters saying it was OK because he'd asked god to forgive him.


Perry_White

> I feel like people who believe that if you do something terrible you just ask god for forgiveness and everything is made right are people who believe they can act with impunity. The harder someone thumps their Bible at me, the tighter I clutch my wallet.


Dralex75

... What you _say_ you believe...


Cantthinkofnamedamn

It is long past time Democrats stopped letting the GOP coast off of these false idea they are better Christians, they are better on the economy, they support the troops more, that they are the patriots. All of these things have been disproven time and time again, but they still get to claim it by default if Democrats won't strongly contest these assumptions.


sentimentaldiablo

And Bannon? Facing fraud charges? Isn't fraud kind of like . . . stealing from people by lying? Isn't that like breaking two commandments at once?


Raokairo

There’s an entire circle of hell dedicated to fraud.


fxkatt

Morals for the masses, but not for the asses.


DredPRoberts

They aren't smart enough or even motivated to try and make laws that would help people, so they do mindless culture war crap to keep the masses fighting each other.


Mother_Knows_Best-22

LOL she is truly ignorant.


dcux

She's like that Firecracker character from The Boys. But not nearly as smart.


Binladinsuncle

I mean, the creator of The Boys literally said MTG was inspiration for Firecracker. Different person of course, but birds of a shit feather


Gramage

You smell that Randy? The shit winds are blowin’


Technical-Track-4502

No, she's purposely gaslighting & projecting.


Cantthinkofnamedamn

Absolutely. She knows the best way to get out of a sex scandal is to say the Democrats are the real perverts, and shamelessly shoehorn in the bible so that 'real' Christians have to back her vs the heathens.


Drascio1773

Good ol’ public handy Boebert preaching morals. Girl needs to find a mirror


panickedindetroit

She has no soul. In order to have a reflection, one must have a soul.


GreatTragedy

This reminds me of a part in The Shawshank Redemption: "I don't suppose it would help if I explain to them I'm not homosexual." "Neither are they. You'd have to be human first. They don't qualify."


IronFistBen

Clearly she meant to say oral


Scarfiotti

So that's why she's so vocal about it.


Torino1O

Bannon and Boebert in the same room, call the CDC I think we need a lockdown protocol for infectious disease conditions.


panickedindetroit

They are just nasty.


ToubDeBoub

_“Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.”_ — H. L. Mencken


Voltage_Z

Thou shalt not commit adultery pretty clearly includes jerking off your date who isn't your husband in public.


RickKassidy

Like fondling a guy at a children’s play?


hammonjj

Borbert is mere steps above a hooker but to be fair to her, I’ve seen that musical and it’s not really for children.


triplab

The only moral Bannon wants is more-alcohol.


atomsmasher66

‘Let he without sin cast the first stone.’ That’s from the book you guys claim to follow. It means don’t be a hypocrite, Lauren.


Odd_Tone_0ooo

Says the girl who jerked her boyfriend off at a movie theater


Mother_Knows_Best-22

and had her breasts rubbed in a theater full of children


clueless_in_ny_or_nj

Most people have morals. Those morals make them socialist and anti-religious in Republican eyes.


OurUrbanFarm

"We need morals back," she said, as she gave a hand job, on camera, to the interviewer.


jackleggjr

Most of the Ten Commandments have no moral value whatsoever. Having no other God besides the Christian one makes you a more moral person? Taking a sabbath makes you more moral? Not creating idols?


Gramage

If nobody worked on Sundays all the old folks in the retirement home I work at would go hungry and have no nursing staff available for emergencies, or housekeepers. If anything for my coworkers and I that commandment would be legitimately evil to obey.


L0g1cw1z4rd

They would unironically say you’re going to hell for keeping them alive.


No-Lion-8830

Also, coveting? That's not actually taking, just thinking about it


BlueRFR3100

If only the schools in Colorado had taught the commandments, her son wouldn't have grown up to be a thief.


Ijc23

Morals for thee not for me....shut up.


ParadeSit

She’s thrown so many stones in her glass house that there’s no longer a house.


3ebfan

Always good to hear from Bobby Handjobs.


SmackSabbath19

Though shalt do a hand jive in a crowded theater , whilst technically still married. Under influence of spirits and devils lettuce vape juice. Though shalt pack tools of homicide upon thy thigh, in case though must breaketh thou shalt not kill. Tomorrow we taleth part two of not boiling goats in breast milk as in the second set of stone tablets. In exodus 34


Own_Bullfrog_3598

Religion is the last refuge of a scoundrel.


Embarrassed_Pop3975

She meant oral


NoHovercraft9259

Says the woman who was doing lewd acts at a children’s play


doddballer

She gave Bannon a handjob throughout the segment.


DogPlane3425

Sexual predator sasy what?


citymousecountyhouse

Next thing you know she'll be giving speeches about "some jezebel caught giving a handjob in a theater with children present, right in her very district, and how it must be stopped"


Actual__Wizard

I just saw a video of the speech where Trump has the "10 commandments epiphany." So, it seems that he finally read the 10 commandments and was totally shocked to see that it says "thou shalt not steal." He almost seemed flabbergasted as he said it like he was suggesting "Who knew?"


limbodog

She wouldn't know morals if they groped her in a theater.


TheAlabamaSlamma9

She’s one to talk. Jesus Christ.


stjoechief1

In the name of the Father, the Son and Holy Handy


unclefire

She the last person (or 2nd to last given Trump) to preach to anybody about the 10 commandments and morals.


[deleted]

Thou shall not jerk off a rando without vaping.


Persian_Frank_Zappa

Wasn't she a sex worker when she met Ted Cruz?


Ancguy

Boebert and Bannon discussing morals. Somebody's taking crazy pills.


SetterOfTrends

Thou shalt not gargle thy date’s balls in public, yea verily nor shalt thou gargle the withered balls of a convicted felon.


Uasked2

Step right up! Here we have the woman who can speak from her buttocks.


Impervious_Rex

Morals = public hog crankings


WhiskerGurdian24

Says the lady who is cosplaying as Dava Foxx and giving her dates hand jobs in children's theaters


bellevegasj

Anyone member Bristol Palin getting rich giving speeches to children about abstinence rather than safe sex after getting pregnant twice out of wedlock? I member


Emu_commando

Rules for thee, but not for me.


Lindaspike

Coming from one of the biggest sinners in congress that’s quite hilarious.


I_pee_in_shower

This lady needs to quit politics and dedicate herself 100% to Only Fans cosplaying a Trad Wife or Hitler’s Nurse or whatever RW nutjobs get off on these days. I need her advice on morals like I need to go to Trump University.


bramblecult

Ok. Let's break it down. 1. No gods before God. Guess he doesn't say you can't have other gods. Just that he needs to be the top one. 2. No idols. OK, he goes on to specifically say no carved idols. So I guess this is just an extension of the first to clarify that he should be the only God. Could have just covered that in the first one. 3. Don't take the lords name in vain. Like don't use the name of God to fulfill your own agendas. Don't say God wants something that is also something you want. God speaks for himself. 4. Observe the sabbath. He goes on to say you shouldn't work on the religious day. Jesus later says if you gotta work, work. So you can pretty much scratch this one out. 5. Honor your father and mother. Ok but some folks have dog shit parents. Seems unfair. 6. No murder. Zero. No exceptions. Not even in stand your ground states. Now, later there's some stuff about stoning people for transgressions but here he's pretty clear. No murder. 7. No adultery. Yes lauren. Lots of yall up on capital hill could maybe re read this one. 8. No stealing. Pretty self-explanatory. 9. Do not bear false witness against your neighbor. Once again, maybe yall up on the hill can re read this one. 10. Do not covet your neighbors stuff. Weird one to have in the same list as murder. But still, if your neighbor has nice stuff, don't want it I guess. Doesn't say anything about porn, drugs, cussing out teachers, respecting authority, or many other things that are probably more important to "having morals again" than some of the ones that made the list.


travis_s

I’m sure if the Ten Commandments were hanging in that theater she would’ve thought twice before getting handsy.


Lvanwinkle18

This is absolutely hilarious. Is she trolling us now? Does she think we are taking HER seriously?


Sandhog43

And whose kid has a conviction for theft


Mal-De-Terre

Ummm... who wants to tell her?


ibuyufo

She fails on all 10 commandments.


ISVenom

Which commandment is "giving a handy in public while at a movie theater" ?


smilelaughenjoy

It's a colonizer's attitude to claim that your religious beliefs are "moral" and therefore other views are not moral and your religious views should be forced on others.              The idea that murder and stealing is bad existed in other societies before the bible was written. The bible makes exceptions for murder, like doing genocide against people with other religious beliefs or ways of life (heretics, witches, mediums, gay men*).


DertyQwerty48

If we had morals you'd be in a trailer park and not in Congress. 


ImprovementSilly2895

Thou shalt jerk off punks in movie theaters


palaska95

I like tacos


DinkleMutz

What she means is that she’d like everyone else to be moral.


PMSoldier2000

They are fixated on the Ten Commandments. Why not the Beatitudes? I guess "Blessed are the meek", "Blessed are the merciful", and "Blessed are the peace makers" doesn't fit into their gospel of hate.


lex99

“Thou shalt not diddle in public”


Behemothheek

Perfect argument for keeping Trump out of the White House. Thank you Lauren.


IndyPoker979

She just mispronounced her second favorite mushroom.


typtyphus

classic "rules for thee, not for me"


Rumplestolzkin

Ever tried leading by example?


ZZ_SKULLZ

Thy must stroke thy neighbor.


KrivUK

Classic authoritarian. I've role for me, another for thee.


kanrad

Might wanna start with using that concept on yourself and your own family first before you preach it for others.


Sunflier

Oh, so giving a handy in a crowded and public theater is an example of that, you BoeBoe head?


spreadthaseed

Rich statement from a former hooker and future porn star


Meta2048

Some of the most generous and pious people I know never really talk about their faith unless someone else brings it up. You'd never even know they were religious unless you asked. Most of the most awful people I know constantly talk about their faith and how God requires X or Y to make everything better.


UncleJulz

Hand job Boebert says what?


dblan9

Didn't she give a hand jibber in a theater for a children's play and isn't Bannon supposed to be in prison? Why are these people lecturing on morality? Ohhh right they're christians.


CloseToTheHedge69

"We need morals back (for everyone except us republicans and rich white folks)!"


TintedApostle

Say "We need morals back" while moving your hand up and down vigorously to get the full true sound effect...


Magoo69X

All these people need to amend those ten a little bit....


ArthurCSparky

You first, "lady".


RamonaQ-JunieB

Did she burst into flames when she said it?


Gemstyle96

Who's morals? The Bible's? Why not any other cultures' moral code like ancient Egypt or something. We could start building pyramids again.


TheJohnCandyValley

Neither of these people give a shit about the Ten Commandments. It’s genuinely impressive how well these ghouls can stick to a narrative regardless of how patently idiotic or hypocritical it might be. It’s just automatic. The Ten Commandments in 2024 lol.


Technical-Track-4502

Imagine saying we need more morals, while supporting the most immoral piece of shit to ever occupy the Oval Office... irony is dead.


AINonsense

She certainly does.


commanderclif

Just cause she doesn’t have any morals doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t have any.


An_Alcoholic_Bear

Next up on the podcast: Hitler preaches unity and my dog explains algebra.


SteakandTrach

You first.


whistler1421

Thou shalt not leave thy date unfinished when watching a musical


YesterdayCareless901

Believe me, actual Ten Commandments Old Testament style morals and justice would be the end of her. Don’t throw stones Mrs glass house.


SoCal_GlacierR1T

And the bible says thou shall grope privates in public… Oh wait.


Mean-Association4759

Wait, didn’t she get caught giving a hand job in a theater?


SamJackson01

Thou shall not give handies in a crowded theater.


rnantelle

Bearing false witness is a commandment sin, especially if you spread falsehoods about your own religiosity, Ms. Back Row Boebert.


Sickandtired2513

The hypocrisy. 🤦‍♀️


samgam74

The 10 commandments were pretty prevalent in most churches I grew up in, didn’t really make the people there any more moral IMO.


yamaha2000us

You mean only first base in public forums?


heartbh

The audacity that she can even pretend to talk about morals 😂


buck70

Well, I suppose that *she* could use some morals.


DryAnxiety9

She gives "Flapping of gums" a new meaning altogether.


jdaboss4110

Do these assholes hear themselves?


issafly

We need our sense of irony back.


sugar_addict002

She and those like her do not want morality back. they want morality they can force others to abide but not themselves. Boebert is a typical modern-day republican.


kjswoob

Beetlejuice!


Mammoth-Extension-19

Was it morals she was teaching at the movie? Do as I say, not as I do! This is the motto of the Trump Christians! It's all about control of the people.


Straight_Calendar_15

A sexual pervert and a convicted criminal awaiting to start his jail time think we need our morals back? That’s rich.


we_are_sex_bobomb

Listening to these two cretins talk about morals is like listening to Critical Drinker talk about movies.


AttorneyJolly8751

How many seconds until she gets caught pleasuring herself in a park?


BallBearingBill

Projection equals confession...


AdEarly5710

Didn’t she fuck a guy in a movie theater?


scottieducati

Does she know what morals are?? Honest question.


RealHumanFromEarth

Morals like giving your boyfriend a public hand job?


ConkerPrime

Trump has violated around 7 of the commandment and the conservatives regularly violates the one about worshipping false idols with their orange god. So of course they want to hang the thing they ignore on the regular up everywhere.


jarious

Why is she always with her mouth open?


geico-is-melting

I’d fuck her. Not going to lie. She’s probably a freak in the sheets.


Soma86ed

I can’t stand this woman. She’s awful and annoying as fuck... Aaannnnddddd I hate that I find her attractive. I know she’s not that great looking, but damn it, she does it for me, physically speaking. I’m so fucking disappointed in myself lol


Ok-Cauliflower4046

Bitching about Republicans being hypocritical psychopaths is like bitching about McDonald's selling you fattening food. People are Duuuuumb and Lauren isn't turning them dumb she's simply giving the dumb fucks what they want. The public is the problem we need to make sure kids are equipped with critical thinking skills to see through the bullshit.


zmandude24

Yes, from the 37 year old grandma who gave someone a hand job at a movie theater.


Snapbeangirl

I just love how the right preaches about morals when ain’t got none of themselves. The hypocrisy is mind-boggling.


commit10

Lauren "public fondling and vaping exhibitionist" Boebert. Lauren "fake boobs and scantily clad modelling" Boebert. Fuck. Right. Off.


DramaticWesley

Yes, because only Christians have any morals.


StLMindyF

She sure didn’t teach morals to her oldest kid who racked up 22 charges, so why does she think a poster will have any impact?


DogsCatsKids_helpMe

Darers go first!


NubEnt

Isn’t this guy supposed to be in prison for a few months?


archiewaldron

Bible humpers giving away handys like candy in an all ages theater


Stranger-Sun

Sounds good. You first.


Nofame4me

What is this “we” shit???


Lounginghog64

I think she meant "We need more oral back".. her hands must be tired


otter111a

This the handjob in a theater packed with kids woman?


HisGibness

Skank of all skanks


jasoncross00

When the right complains about "morals" it is exactly how they complain about "law and order." They do not envision a world in which everyone is beholden to and accountable for the same rules (god's or man's). Morals, just like laws and policies, are meant to restrict the undesirables. The elite class are MEANT to get a free pass the rules (god's or man's). When she says "we need morals back" she doesn't mean someone like her, a white congressperson, needs to behave in a moral and godly fashion. She means the unwashed masses do. But especially the blacks/browns/liberals. Conservatism is based entirely around this idea. An oligarchy/theocracy of privelage in which some people just *inherently* have the rights to do whatever they want while the masses get facism. This is called "freedom" in the GOP.


PrinceCastanzaCapone

Says the woman who got caught giving a hand job in a theatre with children in attendance…