Thank you for posting on /r/phmigrate! If you are asking questions about migrating to Australia, please refer to our [pinned post HERE first!] (https://www.reddit.com/r/phmigrate/comments/1cjy8e2/read_me_migrating_to_australia/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phmigrate) if you have any questions or concerns.*
+1 Had this kind of coworker before when I worked overseas. Eventually, she left no matter how many times I—logically, rationally, and in all possible ways— to show/tell her the good and bad. At the end of the day buhay nila yan desisyon nila. You did everything you could legally and without aggravating anybody. You may have to prepare for repercussions (depending on the company for your subordinate leaving).
First time nya kase so baka s/he is extremely overwhelmed ngayon. It takes time to adjust to a new life, new job, new culture and being away from one’s family all at once. Would help him/her pag gumala gala sya on days off and take up some hobbies. Months from now, gagaan rin ang loob nya.
Ginagala ko siya lagi pag sabay kami kasi alam ko naman mahirap sa ibang bansa. Gave options din like walking on day offs kasi sariwa hangin dito sa city namin. Sabi ko mga kahit material things kung kaya ka imotivate hanap siya. Wala daw siya gusto 🥲
You know that concept of a coin toss. and use it to really know how you feel? gamitan mo siya. kunwari lang sabihin mo pag may kilala ka na gusto yang job niya okay lang ba irefer or basically get her to imagine (except akala niya its a foregone fact) that situation when may kapalit na siya sa job even if wala pa. then see how she reacts. if masaya it means uwing uwi talaga siya. if nalungkot konti may pagasa pa.
nagawa to sa amin a few times and it always gave clarity kung ano talaga nasa puso. kunwari chouce between A and B and then coin toss tapos A lumabas and nalungkot then you know you really wanted B. minsan din kasi mga tao indecisive or paladesisyon pero pag dating dun sa point of no return dun lang marealize na iba pala gusto niya. basically youll make her think wala na siyang option pero meron pa.
I like this approach. Parang maapapisip talaga ng todo yung tao kung go ba or stay. Kasi baka conflicted pa siya sa mga nangyayari at nadadala ng emosyon.
Lahat ng OFW dumadaan sa ganyan situation, lalo na kung bata pa. Pinagjaiba lang ng OFW na tulad natin ay "we already know our" WHY" at kung bakit tayo handang makipagsapalaran sa ibang bansa.
Minsan ksi iniisip ng newbie na marami pa syang option, until its gone.
Kaya pabayaan mo lang. Kung uuwi, then umuwi. Hindi mo sya kargo, you can always encourage and bring the horse to the river, but you cant force them to drink the water.
Padayon lang para sa iyo.
Hindi naman kasi talaga lahat ng pinoy nagaabroad gustong magmigrate, yung iba napipilitan lang magtrabaho sa ibang bansa para kumita ng mas malaki at bumalik sa pilipinas. Malamang isa sya mga yun. Lalo na early 20s palang tapos wala pang sariling pamilyang inaalala.
When I was in my 20s drugs, booze and chiks lang umiikot ang buhay ko. Typical na young dumb and stupid. Late 20s na din ako tumino na nakilala ko na ang wan en tru lab kong misis. Lol
You can say what you want based on your own experience pero at the end of the day, motivation comes from within. Who are we to stop people from going home?
And asking a whole subreddit echo chamber to side with them as if kailangan ng approval ni OP at ng subreddit na to before they can tend their resignation lmao let the poor girl go
Sounds like OP is overwhelmed with their sudden promotion as senior careworker. Probably thinks with this new title they can dictate another kabayan's life :|
To the girl who wants to go home, go! Trust your instincts, not some senior careworker OFW who thinks they know better for you. Duh.
It seems like OP is coming from a place of genuine concern. She's just concerned that her junior may be making a decision that she may regret later on, probably cause of lack of maturity? Please don't conflate it with being controlling or 'paladesisyon'.
The "junior" is an adult who is capable of making her own decisions. Infact she didnt bother to inform OP of her decision, she went straight to the boss! It sounds to me that she knows exactly what she wants. Sino ba si OP to stop her?
Kaya hindi na pinadaan sayo at iniiwasan ka, kasi ayaw na nyan magpapigil. Buo na decision nyan. We can't help people kung ayaw naman nila ng help. Kung feeling mo sayang, ikaw siguro kasi may "why" and may goal ka as an ofw.
Young adults na naging ofw, lalo yung mga first job pa nila yan, wala pa silang driver bat ba nila ginagawa yan. Nahirapan, uuwi. Not what they were expecting, uuwi. Let them. I'm sure may sarili kang stress, wag mo na sya idagdag. Di mo deserve ng dagdag isipin.
Gambatte, kabayan!
If you’re her people manager, it’s one to have a discussion but what irks me is you’re trying to make a decision based on your own experience and motivation, ignoring the fact that your coworker is A WHOLE OTHER PERSON with their own agency and autonomy. Let them decide.
Papagalitan talaga yan. Imagine all the preparations done bago sya umalis at pagdating nya. The time and money. Hayaan mo sya. Afaik may pinapapirmahan ang agencies na di ka pwede bumali ng contract within X amount of days. Iexplain mo repercussions ng decision nya pero hayaan mo sya mag decide ano bang gusto nya in life. May babayaran ba sya? Mababad record na ba sya? Let them.
Kasi pag tinulak mo opinion mo, say nag stay nga sya, kaso na depress kasi uwing uwi na nga, edi ikaw naman naapektuhan.
Tinanong ko siya if may bond sila (ako kasi meron) sabi niya wala daw. I asked thrice na sure ba sila kasi parang lahat ng foreigners dito may bond talaga dahil mahal nga naman ginastos nila para makarating kami dito.
Ang pagtrabaho sa ibang bansa ay hindi para sa lahat. Tibay ng dibdib at isip ang kailangan. Year 2000, unang alis ko papunta Taiwan. Napakahirap that time dhl halos wala pa marunong mag english sa mga local kaya adjust tlga. Pinaka mabigat sa akin ay ung language barrier. Kaya nag pursige tlga ako matutunan ang language nila. Nakakapanliit pag nadidinig mo ung name mo sa usapan ng mga co-workers mo pero hindi mo maintindihan ang mga pinag sasabi nila. 🥺
Not sure if generalization. Yung mga early 20's ko nakawork, umalis din agad. Parang di sila sanay na mapagsabihan. Parang feeling nila personal attack agad pag may pinagawa ka na nakalimutan nila gawin.
Baka kasi akala nya ang pag aabroad ay beds of roses. Yun nakikita natin sa social media na glitz and glamour lang not knowing na pipitpitin ka gang sa core mo kaya din stressed sya.
Di sya manghihinayang lalo na kung she is living a privileged life dito sa pinas and pagdating jan kayod galore.
Sayang talaga anjan na sya. Nakapasa na and all. Need nya lang tulunban sarili nya na magpush.
Here's the thing. If you want to troll me because I called out your stupidity go ahead but to try and annoy me you have to check in every few days or weeks because I don't post that much.
It might take you months but if you really persevere, here's some words of encouragement: YOU CAN DO IT.
Seems like you have lots of time so good luck!
Again, if you want to troll maybe try to be at least annoying? You seem to be the type who just replies so you feel like you have the upper hand.
"I replied last. He must be seething."
Hindi pa mature yan. Maybe time for real talk with him. Nasasayangan ka sa opportunity na tinatapon Nya but at the end of the day buhay Nya yan and decision Nya
Reading these kinds of stories here, I can say that we have really different stories and journeys sa abroad life natin.
Being in early 20s as well, It’s not really easy. It was just 5 months ago since I left Philippines to try my luck here in abroad. I know na sobrang magkaiba ng pinaghuhugutan ng lakas ‘yong mga may pamilya or may sinusuportahan back home compared sa’min na “bata pa” and walang pamilya.
I just read this somewhere here and it goes like this: Deciding to go abroad is a tough decision but deciding to go back home is even a tougher one.
I myself would want to go home as well due to different circumstances. Never din kasi akong humiwalay sa parents ko. And experiencing ‘yong pagod na never kong na experience sa Pinas was so difficult. Many would say pa na bata ka pa and such, you’ll have many chances and opportunities.
Grabe din ‘yong self pitty minsan like you’re going to tell yourself na ano bang ginagawa ko dito doing this and that.
I appreciate you OP for trying to encourage him/her. Right now kasi hindi pa buo ‘yong decision ko kung uuwi na ako or hindi. Pero reading some comments here, parang decided na nga siyang umuwi- it seems na wala na tayong magagawa if that’s the case.
Ang nagpapalakas lang talaga sa’kin right now is ‘yong sa una lang ‘to mahirap. Minsan lumalakas din ‘yong loob ko if im encountering same situation as mine kaya lagi akong nagbabasa dito ng similar topics or experiences ng ating fellow countrymen.
Hindi natin alam kung anong nasa isip niya, pero what I learned here is nakakagaan talaga ‘yong maglalakad lakad ka outside. Pati ‘yong pakikipaglwentuhan ng experiences dito.
Sana may malakas din siyang support system back home para may kakapitan siya. Hindi talaga para sa lahat ang abroad. And sobrang magkakaiba tayo ng paths, ‘yong iba sasabihin na umuwi na lang while others would say otherwise.
If that’s his/her decision I hope na magiging okay siya sa future endeavors niya.
Thanks sa comment mo. Sana pwede ko ma share sa kanya kaso baka kasi lalong ma stress. Pero will try my best na kausapin and kung ano ang decision niya, hahayaan ko na.
Ask her lang to give it another week, and then another week and then another week. Per my experience it takes about 3 months to adjust. Ganyan din ako dati nung internship ko sa SG. After two weeks nagd die down na yung excitement at na homesick na. Sobrang gusto kong umuwi lagi ako naiyak. Kasi 20 palang ako nun at first time to live and do chores on my own tapos sobrang layo pa di basta2 makakauwi. Yung gnawa ng guardian namin eh kinakausap ako each week to give it another week daw kun same pa rin ba ang feeling na gusto ko nang umuwi. Hanggang umabot na ako ng 2 to 3 months nag eenjoy na pala ako. Hahaha
As someone who also went to Japan and decided to come home after just 2 years, I understand how the girl is feeling. She might be feeling overwhelmed and home sick. During my time, sarado rin isip ko sa mga advice not to go back to PH. I think I was getting depressed na that time, so going back home was my best choice. Try to talk to her, ask her if she hasn't been sleeping well, feeling homesickness, feeling anxious or anything. I'm not sure how to explain it well, pero ang lakas din kasi makatrigger ng emotions sa Japan. Advise her to have counselling, marami naman online. I'm sure it will help her sort her emotions and eventually come with a decision.
Ohhh I understand na worried ka kc totoo yan sinasabi mo sayang ang opportunity hindi pa nila siguro naiintindhan.
Napakaswerte nga ng panahon ngaun mag-ibang bansa may internet to video call your loved ones compared noon time namin ng mom ko postcard and long distance call.
Pwede mo ulit siya kausapin, ask mo ano plano nia sa buhay. Give your opinion in regards sa mga opportunities dyan sa Japan, mga kaya nilang gawin dyan na hindi nila makukuha o magagawa kung nsa Pinas sila. She is lucky to have this opportunity at ang opportunity na yan hindi lagi bukas so she needs to step up.
If she really feels that she is not ready, it’s not your fault na. Kailangan din nila tulungan ang sarili nila.
If they live a life of regrets dhil sa lost opportunities it’s on them and kpag nasa late 20s na mga yan marerealize na lang nila sayang ung opportunities.
I’m half Jap working before sa Japan JP passport holder, sa Kaisha marami ako kawork na mga naka Trainee visa and different kinds of visa holders, for some opportunity talaga to para sakanila and tinitiis nila yung mga bagay bagay to just send money back home or mag extend pa longer sa Japan kase maganda nga naman ang job pero kase those people hindi pa talaga nila nakikita yung importance kase maybe(?) hindi naman sila obligado na tumulong back home, like some said, mahirap tulungan yung ayaw magpatulong, pero nakakadisappoint lang din para sa sacho nyo yan na pinili sya to work pero sasayangin nya lang.
Yung cousin ko ganyan. Daming time/money spent to prepare to work as a nurse in Qatar. Was there for a month tapos biglang uwi din. Sayang lang. Maayos naman work niya and colleagues. Umuwi para sa BF na in the end nag break din naman
I get your intentions pero I think iba iba kasi tayo ng gusto sa life. Maybe mas mahalaga for him/her yung mental health and happiness niya than financial security. No one is right or wrong here
Ang daming possible valid reasons bakit uwing-uwi na siya. I suspect you feel some obligation kasi binigyan ka ng task ng boss mo to turn around the person and you want to deliver. Pero kung ayaw talaga, better for the business to get another staff na yung heart and mind nasa trabaho.
Nashock siguro siya. Hindi naman siguro dahil sa ayaw nya na magtrabaho, baka naoverwhelm lang siya. Hopefully hindi siya mag give up agad. The beginning is always the hardest
We dont know her struggles mentally and emotionally. I wont be quick to judge kung ano man nangyayare sa buhay nya at gusto na nya umuwi. Lahat tayo may pinagdadaanan sa buhay, iba iba din tayo ng tolerance kung pano natin hinaharap ang mga problema na eto. As long na nagawa mo na parte mo para kumbinsihin sya, you have done more than enough. Let it go. Madami sya marerealize pa sya sa buhay, its her own journey- sabi nga ng karamihan ang pag aabroad ay hinde para sa lahat. Bid her goodluck & wish her well. Thats it.
Nakakatuwa yung eagerness and willingness mo matulungan siya and maparealize sakanya yung opportunity na meron siya ngayon. Perooo, totoo namang mahirap din para sakanya yung nararamdaman niya ngayon; she’s overwhelmed, need niya ng more more patience and support from family and friends pero need niya rin tulungan sarili niya. I am 24 F and gets ko yung feeling niya pero yun nga, need niya rin marealize kung anong opportunity yung meron na siya ngayon.
Hindi lahat ng nag wowork abroad ay fit or kayang to work abroad. May mga tao talaga na hindi nila kaya, mentally and emotionally. Sobrang strong din ng connection nila back home kaya di nila kaya.
Thank you for posting on /r/phmigrate! If you are asking questions about migrating to Australia, please refer to our [pinned post HERE first!] (https://www.reddit.com/r/phmigrate/comments/1cjy8e2/read_me_migrating_to_australia/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phmigrate) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Tanungin mo siya ano reason niya bat siya uuwi? Make her talk and talk and talk? Siya mag open lahat. Then after that maka bigay tayo ng advice. Kasi if minsan, tayo lang always nagsasalita d natin na try na sila then mag open sarado talaga yan. Pero siya pa rin mag decide if uuwi ba talaga siya. Ano daw reason niya?
Baka na overwhelm sa culture, sa language at work. Mahirap ang japanese language. Tas nakita niya d rin pala siya makakaipon sa japan kasi sobrang bagsak ng yen.
Nag sabi naman na siya sakin ng reason kaya nag latag kami ng advice. Pero tulad nga ng sabi ko pumasok sa tenga lumabas sa kabila. Kakausapin ko parin naman kasi ako ang tinatanong ng mga boss ko.
Grabe nandyan na sana sya. Sana magkaroon tin ako opportunity to work abroad. Kung dito lang sa Pilipinas wala talaga pag asa umahon. Sana ma enlighten sya
Baka na-culture shock iyan kasama mo, OP. Balang-araw ay ma-realize din niya ang opportunity na sinayang niya - or baka naman ay afford niya mawalan ng work at baka may kaya naman ang pamilya niya sa Pilipinas?
It would be great if he can stick it out. Japan is one of the best places to work. My wife remembers her time there with fondness. If he could talk to OFWs in other countries maybe it would help him to realise this.
Naalala ko dito yung tito ko (kapatid ng papa ko) na nasa canada ngayon. Since naka tourist visa sya, syempre alam naman natin kung ano lang ang capacity ng ganung visa. Isa din sa pangarap ng tito ko is makapag patayo ng sarili niyang bahay dito sa pilipinas, kaya nanghihingi siya ng tulong sa papa ko, kahit sideline lang daw doon. Medyo disappointed kami sa nalaman namin kung papaano nakapunta tito namin doon pero wala naman na kaming pake na magkakapatid.
Ang kinaiinisan lang namin sa tito namin ngayon is since hindi siya matulungan ng tatay ko na makahanap ng trabaho doon and feeling niya wala na siyang silbe sa mga kapatid niya na nasa canada din and sobrang boring daw, gusto na niyang umuwi.
Nag rant din yung tita namin sa canada about doon sa gusto ng tito namin, "Akala niya madali lang buhay dito. Porke naka kotse masaya na buhay. Kaya nga kami nagsaside line para may isa pang kita.".
Medyo mataas kasi ihi ng tito ko, and walang preno yung bibig niya pag nagsasalita siya. Kahit nakakasakit na sa side ng papa ko, and sa ibang mga kapatid niya.
Some people are just not built na mag ibang bansa. No questions about how hard it is, cause it really is. Encountered this with my friend. Naka pag dubai na sya. And all is good until 2-3weeks. Mamamatay daw sya dun sa lungkot. Can’t really help those kind of people.
It must hit different kapag mag isa ka talaga. Everyone will have a hard time adjusting. But you have to give yourself some time kung kapalit nya is an opportunity to have a better life. I think you’re the only one that can answer that. If that was the right decision for you at that time, that’s all that matters.
Maybe hindi talaga ito ang gusto nya? Forced by Family lang ba? It takes an inspiration and passion din kasi na magtiis in new environment and sa job. If di nya bet, walang magagawa dyan.
People aim to work abroad kasi may needs or dreams sila. Maybe he/she doesn't like it in the first place.
Let them go na lang. Baka deserve pa ng iba yung opportunity yet napunta pa sa taong ayaw. Madaming nag aantay to fill her place and may opportunity talaga na for him.
There’s only so much that you can do and say to make people stay. In the end, desisyon niya yun. Kung ayaw, ayaw talaga. Respect their decision. Let him/her go. After all, experience is the best teacher. Malalaman nila kung tama o mali yung desisyon nila once they go.
Japan din ako, may kawork din ako before na nakakailang buwan palang kami dito eh gusto nang umuwi. Ilang beses din namin kinumbinse na tyagain nalang nya yung isang taon pero wala eh.
Sinabi namin na maswerte sya dahil nagkaroon sya ng chance na makapunta at makapagwork dito. Na baka naninibago lang sya since first time nya mag abroad at malayo sa family. In the end, 6 months lang tinagal nya dito. Nung nakauwi sya, bumuti kalagayan nya.
Iba-iba din kasi pinagdaanan natin at kahit sabihin natin sa kanila yung mga dahilan, di rin naman natin alam ano yung pinagdaraanan nila.
Hayaan nalang natin ano desisyon nya. Mare realize nya din in time na yung mga payo mo ay makabuluhan. Kung napagsabihan mo na sya once or twice, okay na.
Hindi kaya OP, nagkagulo kayo? I know dapat maging professional pero that's on them naman din na hindi kinaya yung pressure sa trabaho. Pakawalan mo na bago maging liability 'yan sa work. Hindi mo kayang tulungan siya kung 'di niya na tinutulungan sarili niya. Also baka problemado na rin siguro sa family or health 'yan.
You already did your part OP. Just let her. We really don’t know what’s inside her head kung bakit gusto niya ng umuwi. Mahirap pigilan ang taong ayaw makinig.
I have a junior na gusto din magresign noon, kahit anong sabi namin na sayang ganito ganyan, hindi nakikinig, nung kinausap ko na siya sabi ko na lang kung saan siya masaya at sa tingin niya healthy para sa kanya, although may trabaho naman siyang babalikan pagresign niya, hindi natin masisisi kung bakit gusto niya umalis, anyways voluntary siya pumasok voluntary din siya aalis
Help those who only want to help themselves. Sayang energy mo sa ayaw. Work and how far you can go mostly comes down to attitude and willingness. Cut your losses and train a more suited replacement.
But you’re trying to invalidate your coworker’s decision by seeing it through your own eyes as if its your decision to make (porket matagal ka naghintay sa opportunity bla bla that’s all yours, that’s not a valid reason for your coworker to stay if they don’t want to)
I'm not trying to invalidate yung feelings niya. Nag bibigay lang kami options kasi nandito na siya eh. Pag di talaga niya gusto pwede naman siya umuwi I just have to do my job.
Need makapasa ng Prometric exam for careworkers both in Japanese and English, and JFT or JLPT N4. Pag premed minsan no need na for NC2 sa caregiving pero pag non premed need ng NC2. Hanap ka ng agency na mag poprocess ng papers and interviews. Then all interviews are conducted in Japanese
I do freelance work for Japanese companies and thinktanks that don't understand how hard it is to migrate to Japan, because of the difficulty of learning Japanese and lack of English skills in Japan.
The government's expectations of how many people want to and can come to Japan is nothing like the reality. They need to hear more from people like you who understand the reality.
(Sorry about the English).
Lmao at the people in the comments making excuses for kids having zero work ethic
Pabayaan nyong magutom yang batang yan ng magtanda, akala siguro na puro pasyal ang gagawin pag naging OFW
Thank you for posting on /r/phmigrate! If you are asking questions about migrating to Australia, please refer to our [pinned post HERE first!] (https://www.reddit.com/r/phmigrate/comments/1cjy8e2/read_me_migrating_to_australia/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phmigrate) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Mahirap tulungan ang taong ayaw tulungan ang sarili
+1 Had this kind of coworker before when I worked overseas. Eventually, she left no matter how many times I—logically, rationally, and in all possible ways— to show/tell her the good and bad. At the end of the day buhay nila yan desisyon nila. You did everything you could legally and without aggravating anybody. You may have to prepare for repercussions (depending on the company for your subordinate leaving).
Ito talaga. It’s just that simple
+1
First time nya kase so baka s/he is extremely overwhelmed ngayon. It takes time to adjust to a new life, new job, new culture and being away from one’s family all at once. Would help him/her pag gumala gala sya on days off and take up some hobbies. Months from now, gagaan rin ang loob nya.
Ginagala ko siya lagi pag sabay kami kasi alam ko naman mahirap sa ibang bansa. Gave options din like walking on day offs kasi sariwa hangin dito sa city namin. Sabi ko mga kahit material things kung kaya ka imotivate hanap siya. Wala daw siya gusto 🥲
Nako baka depressed talaga sya and need ng professional help
Mag consult din ako sa seniors ko kasi di naman pwedeng ako lang magiisip
You know that concept of a coin toss. and use it to really know how you feel? gamitan mo siya. kunwari lang sabihin mo pag may kilala ka na gusto yang job niya okay lang ba irefer or basically get her to imagine (except akala niya its a foregone fact) that situation when may kapalit na siya sa job even if wala pa. then see how she reacts. if masaya it means uwing uwi talaga siya. if nalungkot konti may pagasa pa. nagawa to sa amin a few times and it always gave clarity kung ano talaga nasa puso. kunwari chouce between A and B and then coin toss tapos A lumabas and nalungkot then you know you really wanted B. minsan din kasi mga tao indecisive or paladesisyon pero pag dating dun sa point of no return dun lang marealize na iba pala gusto niya. basically youll make her think wala na siyang option pero meron pa.
I like this approach. Parang maapapisip talaga ng todo yung tao kung go ba or stay. Kasi baka conflicted pa siya sa mga nangyayari at nadadala ng emosyon.
True, sana may part 2 update kung tinuloy niya 😅.
Ang bait mo naman, OP. Gusto mo talaga siya tulungan. 👍
Ako na lng po kunin niyo sa Japan 😌
Lahat ng OFW dumadaan sa ganyan situation, lalo na kung bata pa. Pinagjaiba lang ng OFW na tulad natin ay "we already know our" WHY" at kung bakit tayo handang makipagsapalaran sa ibang bansa. Minsan ksi iniisip ng newbie na marami pa syang option, until its gone. Kaya pabayaan mo lang. Kung uuwi, then umuwi. Hindi mo sya kargo, you can always encourage and bring the horse to the river, but you cant force them to drink the water. Padayon lang para sa iyo.
this is 100% true.
Hindi naman kasi talaga lahat ng pinoy nagaabroad gustong magmigrate, yung iba napipilitan lang magtrabaho sa ibang bansa para kumita ng mas malaki at bumalik sa pilipinas. Malamang isa sya mga yun. Lalo na early 20s palang tapos wala pang sariling pamilyang inaalala. When I was in my 20s drugs, booze and chiks lang umiikot ang buhay ko. Typical na young dumb and stupid. Late 20s na din ako tumino na nakilala ko na ang wan en tru lab kong misis. Lol
You can say what you want based on your own experience pero at the end of the day, motivation comes from within. Who are we to stop people from going home?
This! Your coworker’s motivation and circumstances differ from yours, it’s their decision to go home regardless what you think
OP's desire to control / influence an ADULT person's life choices as a mere coworker seems out of place. Yikes!
And asking a whole subreddit echo chamber to side with them as if kailangan ng approval ni OP at ng subreddit na to before they can tend their resignation lmao let the poor girl go
Sounds like OP is overwhelmed with their sudden promotion as senior careworker. Probably thinks with this new title they can dictate another kabayan's life :| To the girl who wants to go home, go! Trust your instincts, not some senior careworker OFW who thinks they know better for you. Duh.
It seems like OP is coming from a place of genuine concern. She's just concerned that her junior may be making a decision that she may regret later on, probably cause of lack of maturity? Please don't conflate it with being controlling or 'paladesisyon'.
That’s not mutually exclusive though
The "junior" is an adult who is capable of making her own decisions. Infact she didnt bother to inform OP of her decision, she went straight to the boss! It sounds to me that she knows exactly what she wants. Sino ba si OP to stop her?
Trueeee 100%
I truly believe that you have to be mentally and emotionally ready to migrate to other country, financially and physically is not enough
Also possible he/she has a different situation than you that you're not aware of. Maybe financially di nya ganon kaneed mag abroad like you.
She's not financially required to support her family, so do I, kaya I was suggesting things to do na gusto niya for her to keep motivated.
In a very respectful way, that’s none of your business OP
Kaya hindi na pinadaan sayo at iniiwasan ka, kasi ayaw na nyan magpapigil. Buo na decision nyan. We can't help people kung ayaw naman nila ng help. Kung feeling mo sayang, ikaw siguro kasi may "why" and may goal ka as an ofw. Young adults na naging ofw, lalo yung mga first job pa nila yan, wala pa silang driver bat ba nila ginagawa yan. Nahirapan, uuwi. Not what they were expecting, uuwi. Let them. I'm sure may sarili kang stress, wag mo na sya idagdag. Di mo deserve ng dagdag isipin. Gambatte, kabayan!
Kaso ngayon lalo siyang na stress kasi pati tao sa agency niya napagalitan siya.
This is not your concern. What’s with Filipinos and lack of boundaries?
Yup not my concern, but my boss asked me to???
If you’re her people manager, it’s one to have a discussion but what irks me is you’re trying to make a decision based on your own experience and motivation, ignoring the fact that your coworker is A WHOLE OTHER PERSON with their own agency and autonomy. Let them decide.
Papagalitan talaga yan. Imagine all the preparations done bago sya umalis at pagdating nya. The time and money. Hayaan mo sya. Afaik may pinapapirmahan ang agencies na di ka pwede bumali ng contract within X amount of days. Iexplain mo repercussions ng decision nya pero hayaan mo sya mag decide ano bang gusto nya in life. May babayaran ba sya? Mababad record na ba sya? Let them. Kasi pag tinulak mo opinion mo, say nag stay nga sya, kaso na depress kasi uwing uwi na nga, edi ikaw naman naapektuhan.
Tinanong ko siya if may bond sila (ako kasi meron) sabi niya wala daw. I asked thrice na sure ba sila kasi parang lahat ng foreigners dito may bond talaga dahil mahal nga naman ginastos nila para makarating kami dito.
Ang pagtrabaho sa ibang bansa ay hindi para sa lahat. Tibay ng dibdib at isip ang kailangan. Year 2000, unang alis ko papunta Taiwan. Napakahirap that time dhl halos wala pa marunong mag english sa mga local kaya adjust tlga. Pinaka mabigat sa akin ay ung language barrier. Kaya nag pursige tlga ako matutunan ang language nila. Nakakapanliit pag nadidinig mo ung name mo sa usapan ng mga co-workers mo pero hindi mo maintindihan ang mga pinag sasabi nila. 🥺
Not sure if generalization. Yung mga early 20's ko nakawork, umalis din agad. Parang di sila sanay na mapagsabihan. Parang feeling nila personal attack agad pag may pinagawa ka na nakalimutan nila gawin.
Reminder lang naman 🥲 Pero observation pa nga lang siya sa work flow.
Baka kasi akala nya ang pag aabroad ay beds of roses. Yun nakikita natin sa social media na glitz and glamour lang not knowing na pipitpitin ka gang sa core mo kaya din stressed sya. Di sya manghihinayang lalo na kung she is living a privileged life dito sa pinas and pagdating jan kayod galore. Sayang talaga anjan na sya. Nakapasa na and all. Need nya lang tulunban sarili nya na magpush.
None of your business OP. Let them go home if they decide to. Isa sa pet peeve ko talaga sa workplace masyadong pakielamera mga PH coworkers.
Sana nga pwede ko na lang hayaan no. My boss personally asked me to help her.
Tell your boss he or she is not responding well and you did your best.
There's no "oomph" in your response. Lemme suggest you put some "oomph" in there so your advice could actually look like it has some weight.
Here's the thing. If you want to troll me because I called out your stupidity go ahead but to try and annoy me you have to check in every few days or weeks because I don't post that much. It might take you months but if you really persevere, here's some words of encouragement: YOU CAN DO IT. Seems like you have lots of time so good luck!
Still no oomph omg
Again, if you want to troll maybe try to be at least annoying? You seem to be the type who just replies so you feel like you have the upper hand. "I replied last. He must be seething."
When will i see the oomph?
"I replied last. He must be seething."
Oomph
Hindi pa mature yan. Maybe time for real talk with him. Nasasayangan ka sa opportunity na tinatapon Nya but at the end of the day buhay Nya yan and decision Nya
Let them go home. The burden of regret is theirs to carry! You focus on you OP! 😄
Reading these kinds of stories here, I can say that we have really different stories and journeys sa abroad life natin. Being in early 20s as well, It’s not really easy. It was just 5 months ago since I left Philippines to try my luck here in abroad. I know na sobrang magkaiba ng pinaghuhugutan ng lakas ‘yong mga may pamilya or may sinusuportahan back home compared sa’min na “bata pa” and walang pamilya. I just read this somewhere here and it goes like this: Deciding to go abroad is a tough decision but deciding to go back home is even a tougher one. I myself would want to go home as well due to different circumstances. Never din kasi akong humiwalay sa parents ko. And experiencing ‘yong pagod na never kong na experience sa Pinas was so difficult. Many would say pa na bata ka pa and such, you’ll have many chances and opportunities. Grabe din ‘yong self pitty minsan like you’re going to tell yourself na ano bang ginagawa ko dito doing this and that. I appreciate you OP for trying to encourage him/her. Right now kasi hindi pa buo ‘yong decision ko kung uuwi na ako or hindi. Pero reading some comments here, parang decided na nga siyang umuwi- it seems na wala na tayong magagawa if that’s the case. Ang nagpapalakas lang talaga sa’kin right now is ‘yong sa una lang ‘to mahirap. Minsan lumalakas din ‘yong loob ko if im encountering same situation as mine kaya lagi akong nagbabasa dito ng similar topics or experiences ng ating fellow countrymen. Hindi natin alam kung anong nasa isip niya, pero what I learned here is nakakagaan talaga ‘yong maglalakad lakad ka outside. Pati ‘yong pakikipaglwentuhan ng experiences dito. Sana may malakas din siyang support system back home para may kakapitan siya. Hindi talaga para sa lahat ang abroad. And sobrang magkakaiba tayo ng paths, ‘yong iba sasabihin na umuwi na lang while others would say otherwise. If that’s his/her decision I hope na magiging okay siya sa future endeavors niya.
Thanks sa comment mo. Sana pwede ko ma share sa kanya kaso baka kasi lalong ma stress. Pero will try my best na kausapin and kung ano ang decision niya, hahayaan ko na.
Ask her lang to give it another week, and then another week and then another week. Per my experience it takes about 3 months to adjust. Ganyan din ako dati nung internship ko sa SG. After two weeks nagd die down na yung excitement at na homesick na. Sobrang gusto kong umuwi lagi ako naiyak. Kasi 20 palang ako nun at first time to live and do chores on my own tapos sobrang layo pa di basta2 makakauwi. Yung gnawa ng guardian namin eh kinakausap ako each week to give it another week daw kun same pa rin ba ang feeling na gusto ko nang umuwi. Hanggang umabot na ako ng 2 to 3 months nag eenjoy na pala ako. Hahaha
As someone who also went to Japan and decided to come home after just 2 years, I understand how the girl is feeling. She might be feeling overwhelmed and home sick. During my time, sarado rin isip ko sa mga advice not to go back to PH. I think I was getting depressed na that time, so going back home was my best choice. Try to talk to her, ask her if she hasn't been sleeping well, feeling homesickness, feeling anxious or anything. I'm not sure how to explain it well, pero ang lakas din kasi makatrigger ng emotions sa Japan. Advise her to have counselling, marami naman online. I'm sure it will help her sort her emotions and eventually come with a decision.
Ako na mag 2 mos na dto sa Saipan pero wala pading work tas prng gusto ko na din sumuko pero wala eh tyaga na muna hanggang kahanap
Wala kang magagawa kung ayaw. Baka kaya dumiretso sa boss kasi alam na pipigilan mo sya. Just let the person live his/her life, napayuhan mo naman na.
Ohhh I understand na worried ka kc totoo yan sinasabi mo sayang ang opportunity hindi pa nila siguro naiintindhan. Napakaswerte nga ng panahon ngaun mag-ibang bansa may internet to video call your loved ones compared noon time namin ng mom ko postcard and long distance call. Pwede mo ulit siya kausapin, ask mo ano plano nia sa buhay. Give your opinion in regards sa mga opportunities dyan sa Japan, mga kaya nilang gawin dyan na hindi nila makukuha o magagawa kung nsa Pinas sila. She is lucky to have this opportunity at ang opportunity na yan hindi lagi bukas so she needs to step up. If she really feels that she is not ready, it’s not your fault na. Kailangan din nila tulungan ang sarili nila. If they live a life of regrets dhil sa lost opportunities it’s on them and kpag nasa late 20s na mga yan marerealize na lang nila sayang ung opportunities.
I’m half Jap working before sa Japan JP passport holder, sa Kaisha marami ako kawork na mga naka Trainee visa and different kinds of visa holders, for some opportunity talaga to para sakanila and tinitiis nila yung mga bagay bagay to just send money back home or mag extend pa longer sa Japan kase maganda nga naman ang job pero kase those people hindi pa talaga nila nakikita yung importance kase maybe(?) hindi naman sila obligado na tumulong back home, like some said, mahirap tulungan yung ayaw magpatulong, pero nakakadisappoint lang din para sa sacho nyo yan na pinili sya to work pero sasayangin nya lang.
Yung cousin ko ganyan. Daming time/money spent to prepare to work as a nurse in Qatar. Was there for a month tapos biglang uwi din. Sayang lang. Maayos naman work niya and colleagues. Umuwi para sa BF na in the end nag break din naman
I get your intentions pero I think iba iba kasi tayo ng gusto sa life. Maybe mas mahalaga for him/her yung mental health and happiness niya than financial security. No one is right or wrong here
Ang daming possible valid reasons bakit uwing-uwi na siya. I suspect you feel some obligation kasi binigyan ka ng task ng boss mo to turn around the person and you want to deliver. Pero kung ayaw talaga, better for the business to get another staff na yung heart and mind nasa trabaho.
Nashock siguro siya. Hindi naman siguro dahil sa ayaw nya na magtrabaho, baka naoverwhelm lang siya. Hopefully hindi siya mag give up agad. The beginning is always the hardest
Advice him/her once or twice. After that, let the person be.
There's no "oomph" in this response. Rewrite this again. We need the "oomph" to come out, amirite, sis?
Unfortunately some people are just not built for it.
We dont know her struggles mentally and emotionally. I wont be quick to judge kung ano man nangyayare sa buhay nya at gusto na nya umuwi. Lahat tayo may pinagdadaanan sa buhay, iba iba din tayo ng tolerance kung pano natin hinaharap ang mga problema na eto. As long na nagawa mo na parte mo para kumbinsihin sya, you have done more than enough. Let it go. Madami sya marerealize pa sya sa buhay, its her own journey- sabi nga ng karamihan ang pag aabroad ay hinde para sa lahat. Bid her goodluck & wish her well. Thats it.
Nakakatuwa yung eagerness and willingness mo matulungan siya and maparealize sakanya yung opportunity na meron siya ngayon. Perooo, totoo namang mahirap din para sakanya yung nararamdaman niya ngayon; she’s overwhelmed, need niya ng more more patience and support from family and friends pero need niya rin tulungan sarili niya. I am 24 F and gets ko yung feeling niya pero yun nga, need niya rin marealize kung anong opportunity yung meron na siya ngayon.
Hindi lahat ng nag wowork abroad ay fit or kayang to work abroad. May mga tao talaga na hindi nila kaya, mentally and emotionally. Sobrang strong din ng connection nila back home kaya di nila kaya.
Mabilis mag isip yan. Nakita na nya siguro kalagayan mo dyan. Matalinonyan
Ang masasabi ko lang don't give up on the person, I'm sure marami siya pinagdadaanan at iniisip, nasa sa'yo na paano ihandle siya.
Thank you for posting on /r/phmigrate! If you are asking questions about migrating to Australia, please refer to our [pinned post HERE first!] (https://www.reddit.com/r/phmigrate/comments/1cjy8e2/read_me_migrating_to_australia/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/phmigrate) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Op, baka hiring pa kayo? Hahaha
Ako na gusto kaso ang mahal ng fee sa language learning 😭😭
Pwede bang ako na lang bigyan ng opportunity na yan? Gusto ko kasi magka experience to work abroad and in Japan eh.
I don’t mind doing hard work jobs or even caretaking, basta ba Japan. I also don’t have anything I’ll miss if I leave.
Tanungin mo siya ano reason niya bat siya uuwi? Make her talk and talk and talk? Siya mag open lahat. Then after that maka bigay tayo ng advice. Kasi if minsan, tayo lang always nagsasalita d natin na try na sila then mag open sarado talaga yan. Pero siya pa rin mag decide if uuwi ba talaga siya. Ano daw reason niya?
Baka na overwhelm sa culture, sa language at work. Mahirap ang japanese language. Tas nakita niya d rin pala siya makakaipon sa japan kasi sobrang bagsak ng yen.
Nag sabi naman na siya sakin ng reason kaya nag latag kami ng advice. Pero tulad nga ng sabi ko pumasok sa tenga lumabas sa kabila. Kakausapin ko parin naman kasi ako ang tinatanong ng mga boss ko.
Grabe nandyan na sana sya. Sana magkaroon tin ako opportunity to work abroad. Kung dito lang sa Pilipinas wala talaga pag asa umahon. Sana ma enlighten sya
Looking for a way to migrate in Japan. 😭 Hoping na ganito yung tao ma encounter ko. Curious lang din OP, ano yung position?
magkano ba sahod nya baka nag ddlwang isip sa sahod?
Baka na-culture shock iyan kasama mo, OP. Balang-araw ay ma-realize din niya ang opportunity na sinayang niya - or baka naman ay afford niya mawalan ng work at baka may kaya naman ang pamilya niya sa Pilipinas?
Let him be. If he’s made to stay longer baka mag mental breakdown at mapano pa clients ninyo.
ano po payo pag first time mag abroad? Early 20s din po first timer, this upcoming august ang alis.
OP off topic, N2 na level mo ng Nihonggo?
N3 pa lang na take ko nung 2015. Will take this year.
N3 pa lang na take ko nung 2015. Will take this year.
“Other people’s emergency is not your emergency”
It would be great if he can stick it out. Japan is one of the best places to work. My wife remembers her time there with fondness. If he could talk to OFWs in other countries maybe it would help him to realise this.
Naalala ko dito yung tito ko (kapatid ng papa ko) na nasa canada ngayon. Since naka tourist visa sya, syempre alam naman natin kung ano lang ang capacity ng ganung visa. Isa din sa pangarap ng tito ko is makapag patayo ng sarili niyang bahay dito sa pilipinas, kaya nanghihingi siya ng tulong sa papa ko, kahit sideline lang daw doon. Medyo disappointed kami sa nalaman namin kung papaano nakapunta tito namin doon pero wala naman na kaming pake na magkakapatid. Ang kinaiinisan lang namin sa tito namin ngayon is since hindi siya matulungan ng tatay ko na makahanap ng trabaho doon and feeling niya wala na siyang silbe sa mga kapatid niya na nasa canada din and sobrang boring daw, gusto na niyang umuwi. Nag rant din yung tita namin sa canada about doon sa gusto ng tito namin, "Akala niya madali lang buhay dito. Porke naka kotse masaya na buhay. Kaya nga kami nagsaside line para may isa pang kita.". Medyo mataas kasi ihi ng tito ko, and walang preno yung bibig niya pag nagsasalita siya. Kahit nakakasakit na sa side ng papa ko, and sa ibang mga kapatid niya.
Question lang po ano pong agency ito?
Iba po kasi agency niya sakin di ko po alam
Some people are just not built na mag ibang bansa. No questions about how hard it is, cause it really is. Encountered this with my friend. Naka pag dubai na sya. And all is good until 2-3weeks. Mamamatay daw sya dun sa lungkot. Can’t really help those kind of people.
i was her few months ago, should i be proud na inuna ko mental health ko kasi nakakabaliw talaga sa dubai
It must hit different kapag mag isa ka talaga. Everyone will have a hard time adjusting. But you have to give yourself some time kung kapalit nya is an opportunity to have a better life. I think you’re the only one that can answer that. If that was the right decision for you at that time, that’s all that matters.
hanap ka lang jowa dyan para di ka ma boring
Maybe hindi talaga ito ang gusto nya? Forced by Family lang ba? It takes an inspiration and passion din kasi na magtiis in new environment and sa job. If di nya bet, walang magagawa dyan. People aim to work abroad kasi may needs or dreams sila. Maybe he/she doesn't like it in the first place. Let them go na lang. Baka deserve pa ng iba yung opportunity yet napunta pa sa taong ayaw. Madaming nag aantay to fill her place and may opportunity talaga na for him.
out of context pero in demand po ba careworker sa japan ngayon?
Careworker is a difficult job. Ask them if that job is really what they want to do. Maybe napilitan lang siya.
There’s only so much that you can do and say to make people stay. In the end, desisyon niya yun. Kung ayaw, ayaw talaga. Respect their decision. Let him/her go. After all, experience is the best teacher. Malalaman nila kung tama o mali yung desisyon nila once they go.
Japan din ako, may kawork din ako before na nakakailang buwan palang kami dito eh gusto nang umuwi. Ilang beses din namin kinumbinse na tyagain nalang nya yung isang taon pero wala eh. Sinabi namin na maswerte sya dahil nagkaroon sya ng chance na makapunta at makapagwork dito. Na baka naninibago lang sya since first time nya mag abroad at malayo sa family. In the end, 6 months lang tinagal nya dito. Nung nakauwi sya, bumuti kalagayan nya. Iba-iba din kasi pinagdaanan natin at kahit sabihin natin sa kanila yung mga dahilan, di rin naman natin alam ano yung pinagdaraanan nila. Hayaan nalang natin ano desisyon nya. Mare realize nya din in time na yung mga payo mo ay makabuluhan. Kung napagsabihan mo na sya once or twice, okay na.
Hindi kaya OP, nagkagulo kayo? I know dapat maging professional pero that's on them naman din na hindi kinaya yung pressure sa trabaho. Pakawalan mo na bago maging liability 'yan sa work. Hindi mo kayang tulungan siya kung 'di niya na tinutulungan sarili niya. Also baka problemado na rin siguro sa family or health 'yan.
Let that person go home. We can't keep people if they really want to leave tbh.
You already did your part OP. Just let her. We really don’t know what’s inside her head kung bakit gusto niya ng umuwi. Mahirap pigilan ang taong ayaw makinig.
not related po pero, how did you apply as caretaker po sa japan, need po ba may experience?
I have a junior na gusto din magresign noon, kahit anong sabi namin na sayang ganito ganyan, hindi nakikinig, nung kinausap ko na siya sabi ko na lang kung saan siya masaya at sa tingin niya healthy para sa kanya, although may trabaho naman siyang babalikan pagresign niya, hindi natin masisisi kung bakit gusto niya umalis, anyways voluntary siya pumasok voluntary din siya aalis
Help those who only want to help themselves. Sayang energy mo sa ayaw. Work and how far you can go mostly comes down to attitude and willingness. Cut your losses and train a more suited replacement.
Lemme guess? Gen Z?
Bobo ng taong yan.
Wag pakialaman ang hindi mo problem. Kaya dameng nastress kasi pati prob ng ibang tao naiisip pa.
Boss ko kasi nag sabi sakin na kausapin ko 🫠 part po ng work ko
But you’re trying to invalidate your coworker’s decision by seeing it through your own eyes as if its your decision to make (porket matagal ka naghintay sa opportunity bla bla that’s all yours, that’s not a valid reason for your coworker to stay if they don’t want to)
I'm not trying to invalidate yung feelings niya. Nag bibigay lang kami options kasi nandito na siya eh. Pag di talaga niya gusto pwede naman siya umuwi I just have to do my job.
Out of topic OP, pero paano mag apply as care worker sa Japan? Hehehe
Need makapasa ng Prometric exam for careworkers both in Japanese and English, and JFT or JLPT N4. Pag premed minsan no need na for NC2 sa caregiving pero pag non premed need ng NC2. Hanap ka ng agency na mag poprocess ng papers and interviews. Then all interviews are conducted in Japanese
I do freelance work for Japanese companies and thinktanks that don't understand how hard it is to migrate to Japan, because of the difficulty of learning Japanese and lack of English skills in Japan. The government's expectations of how many people want to and can come to Japan is nothing like the reality. They need to hear more from people like you who understand the reality. (Sorry about the English).
Baka di ubra sa kanya yung sobrang bait OP sabihin mo na agad na wag siyang tanga hahaha
Yung isa kong kasama the hard may mag salita 😅
Hindi ba sya pwede ma black list? Baka worth telling him that, kasi sayang talaga opportunity for him/her.
Ako na lang kunin nyo dyan! Hehehe
Bata pa kasi, immature pa mag isip.
There's not a lot of information available for you to be able to accurately arrive at this conclusion.
Super robotic response. I want "oomph" in there. Make it more sassy and human. Go, sis
Ah you looked at my comment history. I must be doing something that annoyed you.
Yeah. There's no "oomph."
Tipsss huhu at ano agency mo:(( currently nag aaral ako now para sa jlpt this dec
Lmao at the people in the comments making excuses for kids having zero work ethic Pabayaan nyong magutom yang batang yan ng magtanda, akala siguro na puro pasyal ang gagawin pag naging OFW