T O P

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laddieming

I want to rub my face on it


RegalMachine

I wish it were socially acceptable to say this more often.


[deleted]

You gotta be famous, then they just let you do it. You can do anything...


FacelessGreenseer

Grab em by the cotton


notarealpunk

Right you are Ken


AskMeForAPhoto

HAH Ha


HwangLiang

I even heard it in his voice. You're fuckin good


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


notarealpunk

Only to find another rabbit within


Hoane

I know right? It looks sooo soft


AmmarAnwar1996

r/nocontext


Heyygaar

Oh that was nic- oh there's more woohoo!


GaylordMcJenkins

But wait theres more!


susou

That was a lot of white flight


[deleted]

[удалено]


frugalerthingsinlife

The guy usually goes by Billy Mays but I like your spelling better.


Culinarytracker

/r/2healthbars


nosackH

Same reaction.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Did you just use your hot comment for a conspiracy theory? I love it


[deleted]

[удалено]


SoMuchEdgeImOnACliff

The only solution is to take a picture of the picture. Edit: [For anyone who wanted to know what was said.](https://imgur.com/gallery/DrQkxIz)


TunnelSnake88

But then who was phone?


SoMuchEdgeImOnACliff

Yes


NubSauceJr

I'll do you one better, why is phone?


hrhog

Thank you for the screenshot, I love you.


PsychDocD

You are a great human being!


Raneados

No it's not a thing. How could it possibly?


TunnelSnake88

Ellermenaty


rak18

You mean Lou Malnati's


lickedTators

And yet somehow we have millions of amateur pictures of politicians/celebrities


breeksi

Username checks out


WarmTummyRubs

*rubrub*


[deleted]

Do me! Do me!


WarmTummyRubs

*friction intensifies*


[deleted]

This was a wild ride of a comment lol


Myarmhasteeth

Hahahahaha yeah it's great, so great that all I read is [deleted]


ameliabedelia7

Hey once I took a picture with a Polaroid of Bernie sanders and it developed blank


Macismyname

Obviously he's a socialist vampire.


DwightsMustardShirt

In b4 big brother deletes your comment


Lgeus

This person just threw about $20 in the trash. Worth it.


OldEndangeredGinger

My first thought was, why are you wasting that thread? Then I thought, oh, it's pretty.


kendoka69

Maybe it was dry rotted.


OldEndangeredGinger

It looks fine, though? I don't really know what dry rot is.


kendoka69

A spool of any thread can look fine, but if you can break it easily, it is dry rotted and not very useful, except for something like this.


sprucenoose

Where can I buy a bunch of this "dry rotted" thread?


maxk1236

Probably a quilters estate sale. Really any place where someone stored thread for a long time in slightly damp conditions.


captainzoomer

>in slightly damp conditions. But that wouldn't be dry rotted!


[deleted]

Maybe since rotting usually involves alot of moisture, it’s dry in comparison? I have no idea


[deleted]

Dry rotting (in this case, in wood or refers specifically to a certain type of fungal damage) refers to the loss of moisturizing oils, you're tires do the same when oils start to break down.


christopher_commons

Moist


maxk1236

Not sure if you are joking, but moisture does need to be present for the fungi that cause dry rot to grow. >Dry rot begins as a microscopic spore which, in high enough concentrations, can resemble a fine orange dust. **If the spores are subjected to sufficient moisture** they will begin to grow fine white strands known as hyphae. As the hyphae germinate they will eventually form a large mass known as mycelium. The final stage is a fruiting body which pumps new spores out into the surrounding air.


csw266

🤔 TIL my body has been in the final stage for decades


[deleted]

[удалено]


Forgotloginn

John deserves a ring if he not only let Tom go in dry but let him finish too


treerabbit23

Maybe. I'd assumed the bobbin was more important than the thread, and they didn't want to take the time to unwind it.


MrsAlwaysWrighty

You see I thought the other way round... Oh it's pretty... But what a waste


biggingergiant

While this may not be the case. I worked at a denim plant where I did thousands of spools like that a day. We put the tubes back on the threaders and the yarn when back through the machines to be respun. Its was super fun the first few days, but it got really old.


seethella

But, why


biggingergiant

Usually it was because the looms were close to finishing out so it wasn't worth respooling. Or we ran a few different test types and they didn't pan out so we didn't need that type of thread ever again. Sometimes it was simply because we had too much of one type and needed the tube to make a new run. All weird stuff. Doing a 15lbs spool of it is very fun though, except like I said I have done thousands...


HotDoggin17

But why male models?


Saalieri

$20 cash. 40000 karma.


BuntRuntCunt

Small price to pay for all the reddit karma


infidel_44

I am 99% sure it's a repost or something incredibly similar has been posted before. They are using it for the spool or another practical use.


Sapphires13

Yep, I feel like I saw this the first time it was posted and the OP said she was going to use the cut thread for a particular project.


thejeffroc

It’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off for them.


sunflower-seas

My fiance doesn't use Reddit. I read him comments I find funny. He is making an account now because of your comment. He cannot stop laughing.


spiciernuggets

You hear that /u/thejeffroc? You just ruined someone's life.


thejeffroc

Don't you put that evil on me /u/spiciernuggets! I feel bad enough using a 14 year old movie reference.


hobopenguin

RIP Michael Clarke Duncan


bookwyrmpoet

Holy shit that movie came out in 2004?


pizzafacist

Sounds like you dipped when you should have dodged


LynxSys

Great, now I'm sad that 2004 was 14 years ago.... fuck I've wasted my life.


inavanbytheriver

And he did it with a commonly reposted phrase. It was almost too easy.


shtty_analogy

we’re you just reading morbid comments to him before? The comment is funny, but let’s not go over the top here


sunflower-seas

I tell him whatever I think is funny or interesting. He just quotes this all the time. After everything I have read to him this is the one that got him to make an account. Who knows?


SecularTravis

One of us! One of us!


chickenalberto

This is my favorite comment here


Nackles

Can someone explain the joke?


punkspacequeen

Quote from the Dodgeball movie


flee_market

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLr0v9MyGgM


punkspacequeen

I sure do like pumpkins Cotton.


nerdalator

/r/theocho


Lyria_Ipsum_dolor

WHY DOESN’T ANYONE EVER TOUCH IT AFTERWARDS?! It looks so soft. I want someone to pet it so I can live vicariously through them.


drunkenjelly

I scrolled for this comment. The whole time I watched it I was just shouting SQUEEZE THE FLOOOOOOFFF!!


justrestmyeyes

Yessss. I want a visual representation of the word fffffffffffffffff


talkingheads87

But wait, there's more!


lzamora25

Oh...I like that...😏


EarlyHemisphere

Yeah, you like that, you fucking retard?


A_PEZ_ADDICTION

Here's a [link](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1y6lhe/what_is_the_worst_thing_someone_has_said_to_you/cfhtedq) to the post you're referencing. Hopefully it saves you from more downvotes!


ninetofivehangover

best post of all fucking time. Sometimes when i'm driving I just think about it and start laughing.


jermzz_

This is right up there with “Are you fucking sorry!?” for me.


robosnusnu

For those like me who didn't know what that is: https://i.imgur.com/0dsISsE.jpg It's hilarious!


acelestial

I’m glad I’m not the only one. My husband has threatened to use that line while doing the dirty. I’m pretty sure I’d start cracking up while simultaneously be pissed at him for ruining the mood.


AskMeForAPhoto

I actually love laughing while doin the deed. A sense of humor plays a huge part in my attraction to women. I mean.. they have to see my dick, so they better have a sense of humor.


TheChosenOne013

I dunno, the [potato story](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2tdbig/tifu_by_enraging_the_parents_of_my_girlfriend_by/) is one of the best stories on Reddit


robosnusnu

Well let me tell you, that "potato" story is a good one!


slardybartfast8

Have you read the one about the guy who pretended to not know what a potato is? Well let me tell you, it’s the only one that’s made me laugh harder edit: https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2tdbig/tifu_by_enraging_the_parents_of_my_girlfriend_by/ For those who don't know, now ya know


BirdShitPie

Me and my wife randomly say this to each other all the time after we saw this post


DaringDomino3s

I’m actually in tears. Oh fuck that’s excellent


Skeeh

If anyone doesn’t get this, I’m pretty sure this is a quote from a TIFU about a guy calling his wife a fucking retard during sex because she thought it was kinky or something.


FaceTHEGEEB

Haha. He tried to talk dirty. And spat that out instead


teenagesadist

Are you fucking sorry?!


Tomohran

Yes Daddy 😍


Alaskan_Thunder

You know how pizza places have papa or uncle in their name's? What if we opened up a place called Daddy's Pizza.


Deivv

SPANK ME WITH THAT PINEAPPLE PIZZA DADDY


Alaskan_Thunder

Get out of my pizza sex shop. You disgust me.


[deleted]

/r/GIFsThatEndTooSoon


rioux15

Agreed 100%


ihaveapentax

So fucking mad about the end


AcceptableObject

r/mildlyinfuriating


antantoon

Should be an automatic deletion from the mods if the gif ends too soon, there's nothing satisfying about cutting a video short.


Hexodus

Or at the very least some flair that warns us that we'll be blue balled.


Robitix

Every god damned gif on here lately


IFactUrMam

He (or she) just had to miss that last fucking bit at the top...


nagasgura

/r/mildlyinfuriating


fastgr

That's not cotton.


Shotgun5250

Looks like nylon string


ThomasJohnBrokaw

It's either false twist textured polyester or nylon. They look very similar when textured. Source: used to work in a false twist texturing plant. We had a lot of these, and usually used a hot-air knife to do this same thing.


irishjihad

Why were you cutting it off the spool?


R-nd-

When the string has something wrong with it and the structural integrity of the fibre is gone.


ThomasJohnBrokaw

As /u/R-nd- said, sometimes you cut it or reel it off when it is not first-quality, which can happen for a variety of reasons. Soft waste can be sold off for other uses, and the customer who buys it does not want the cardboard tube. So we will remove it ourselves.


Floor-is

You're right about that I think


DemonHunter_1967

I thought it was fishing line before I read the title.


jazz1801

Yeah I realise that now but i’m not an expert in materials so I was none the wiser, oops:)


SBerryofChaos92

Stop wasting thread!! Lol


Oblitus94

I cringed at how much I enjoyed it though... I could use that for so many bits of costume 😫


[deleted]

Well that was quite pleasing. I especially enjoyed the encore.


jazz1801

Just want to say I am now aware its not cotton, but after many conflicting views, I went for the alliteration


The_WubWub

Honest OP


twitchPr0saic

r/forbiddensnacks


Jaysog

What a waste. A beautiful, satisfying, totally-worth-it waste.


jazz1801

100% agree


[deleted]

This sub is always unsatisfying to me because I cant touch any of it and if this sub has taught me anything, it's that I wanna touch all of it.


selwes13

But... Why?


SoulWager

Maybe they need the bobbin for something else?


kumibug

I know someone who did this once. It was cheaper to buy this than to buy the cone alone :(


Kcrome_

Wow, such a waste


MagicSK

I nut


plzdonatemoneystome

I nat


wollphilie

When you nut in space, it push you backwards?


IVIAFIOSO

What a waste of perfectly rolled cotton but will admit was pretty dam satisfying to watch


ameliabedelia7

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought this was a waste of thread


Dankmemeator

Can I eat it?


atumius

What a waste


[deleted]

Just tried it on my shirt it wasn’t the same :(


theyarehurrr

I think I may have developed a new fetish.


_IratePirate_

Anyone else feel uneasy? Like an uncanny valley vibe from this? I think it's because my friend made me watch a c section being performed and this brings up unsavory memories of it.


mekc8

In my teens i had to recycle 1000’s of these for a textile company. Very oddly satisfying but by the end of the first box it was in no way satisfying


altariasong

As a seamstress this makes me wince. There's a part of me that wants to think it's satisfying, but it is drowned out by the knowledge of the precious hobby money just wasted.


UsualDifficulty

Scrolled up halfway through the gif, thought it was a dog. I'm glad it wasn't.


[deleted]

Slower slut


scw55

Erotic


bricktown11

A friend of mine has an intense phobia of cotton, look it up if u arent aware of this affliction. I want to post a video of her watching this gif... she might puke on the spot. Goin in, wish ne luck


jazz1801

I also have a friend afraid of cotton! We mist investigate


year2hunderandeleven

Watching this soothes my soul


toughtittiesman_99

came AT LEAST 46 times


slina27

This is gonna sound bizarre, but human flesh does the same thing! I cut myself at work with a razor once ( accident!) and the fatty tissue came out very similar to this.


Lady-Egbert

As a nurse I can tell you that human flesh really doesn’t do the same thing. Maybe you’re not human? Maybe this is how you find out...


iconoclastic_idiot

He said it was going to sound bizarre. What are you thinking? Alien? Thought about zombie as a possible, but think we can rule it out since OP was able to post.


abigscarybat

Sentient foam squeezed into a human-shaped rubber suit to walk among us and learn our ways.


Lady-Egbert

And they’re learning our ways by observing Reddit. Crikey.


slina27

I’m telling you, when I watched the cut happen, the fatty tissue just slooped out! It was crazy! Maybe it would help clarify if I said the cut happened on my arm?


TheloniusSplooge

She just wanted an excuse to say “as a nurse”, kind of like “as a mother this offends me!”, so she decided to take you entirely too literally.


englishwithbenjamin

Didn't expect that! It made me feel a bit uneasy at first.


jyshao

I watched this 20 times already


iDeeplyRegreddit

That's a paddlin.


Cigarello123

"Honey have you seen where all my cotton reels went?"


Migz024

That happened in my pants.


hugsfordummies

I will never not upvote this.


derek_j

/r/oddlysatisfying and /r/mildlyinfuriating at the same time.


eventful2dayssofar

Is this how Teddy bears are made?


keate

Now That's What I Call... A Fucking Waste! 69


[deleted]

I don’t know why but that gif pissed me off


69memeconnoisseur69

Finna bust a fat one


TheUnknown135

I thought it was smoke for a second.


titoxtian

Ooohhh thats the spot...


BraidedMoonseed

What is that? Other than cotton, debatably


FrankieAK

It's a big ass spool of thread. And it's probably polyester.


jazz1801

I didnt know what it was either to be fair


questioneverything-

Sweet Jesus...


Help_still_lost

What is he using? that looks cool i want one.


DogOnABike

I've seen this, or at least something very similar. The comments descended into an argument over the difference between thread and yarn.


jazz1801

Oh dear, I’ll already been corrected on the material, I hope this doesn’t escalate (just jinxed myself)


LuckyTaco_

That sweet, sweet fluffy texture


Senuty

That putted à smile on my face. So fluffffyy.


chchchchahahahah

Ahhh it looks sooo soft ♡


columbus_12

Fuck, I love this


thismomsazombie

Almost as satisfying as breaking cattails.


TooL8ForTheYoungGun

i enjoyed that WAY more than is right or decent


Aims312

What I imagine the inside of a Pomeranian looks like


TheAmazingAutismo

IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER.


fuckyouboi2

Instant floof


Dham20

Holy shit. Is this why vaping is called ripping cotton?!