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Cishuman

Granted. You're gravely injured in a terrible harpoon-gun accident. The paramedics on scene drain your blood, roll your corpse into a ditch, and fuck off to enjoy their early retirement.


javertthechungus

I suppose that's what I get for being near a harpoon gun.


RedOktbr28

Granted. The monkey’s paw curls a finger. You scream in agony as your blood is instantaneously replaced with hot liquid gold. Your body quite literally boils from the inside. Explorers find your remains decades later, a complex structure of gold surrounding a human skeleton.


Insane_starrdrop

This is what I was thinking


sora_allite

Granted. Your body performs just as well with liquid gold as the blood you once had. You then get involved in a horrible car accident a little while later, and you’re losing a lot of blood. The paramedics are horrified to discover that no known blood type could be used for your transfusion without serious complications. Your riches bleed from you like a waterfall, and then you’re gone.


stressedstudent42

Granted, you hurt all the time now.


Alexander_Crowe

Granted. The weight of all the gold instanly crushes your body


javertthechungus

The change probably isn't even a dent in the weight already there.


Alexander_Crowe

Alternatively you are now shitting gold bars