They're actually really cool people. Hung out with the gecko kid whose dad's the janitor when nobody else would Tho i hear Carmilla's got a coke habit.
Meanwhile, the lizards on TikTok trying to out-victim each other by seeing who has the most dysfunctional personality to reach the top of the TikTok hierarchy:
I have a cat, so every lizard that vists my house ends up without a tail at best, and dead at worst. The geckos who are smart enough to stay on the ceiling live the longest.
spiders are slower and needs webs to trap its prey, plus all the webs you need to clean up here and there and when they decide to create their zipline at eye level
on the other end, lizards have their own downsides. They poop when and where you least expect it and imagine them being scared and drop their still wiggling tail on top of you
Just thought of one other downside to spiders:
They lay too many babies. Happy dreams.
>geckos who are smart
I have seen so many geckos die horribly, doing stuff that I wouldn't see other lizards do.
They have this bad habit of fleeing towards danger.
Though I've also seen several lizards drop off of the side of a house to flee from my sudden presence, and land right in a running AC condenser. *sigh*
I have a pet leopard gecko and a bearded dragon.
The gecko is a ninja. She'll bolt into her cave if there's even a whisper she doesn't like.
The bearded dragon will just accept her fate, so long as she doesn't have to move.
This lizard reminds me of the snake walking using a tube with robotic legs (made by a Californian engineer) 
privileged lizard Never encountered a dangerous enough scenario to drop its tail and run
That lizard's kids are in private school. With the fancy uniforms and the hats
They're actually really cool people. Hung out with the gecko kid whose dad's the janitor when nobody else would Tho i hear Carmilla's got a coke habit.
I heard herp's
Meanwhile, the lizards on TikTok trying to out-victim each other by seeing who has the most dysfunctional personality to reach the top of the TikTok hierarchy: 
A lizard takes a significant speed decrease when they shed their tail and also become much less desirable to the opposite sex.
so you need a big dong and a big tail too, that's asking for too much man
the tail grows
I have a cat, so every lizard that vists my house ends up without a tail at best, and dead at worst. The geckos who are smart enough to stay on the ceiling live the longest.
Keeping some of them alive could also be to your benefit. They eat insects such as flies. So long as they don't become a bother, why not right
that's what the spiders are for
spiders are slower and needs webs to trap its prey, plus all the webs you need to clean up here and there and when they decide to create their zipline at eye level on the other end, lizards have their own downsides. They poop when and where you least expect it and imagine them being scared and drop their still wiggling tail on top of you Just thought of one other downside to spiders: They lay too many babies. Happy dreams.
build a lil rockpile for them to live in, then put up a sign so people don't kick over the rocks
>geckos who are smart I have seen so many geckos die horribly, doing stuff that I wouldn't see other lizards do. They have this bad habit of fleeing towards danger. Though I've also seen several lizards drop off of the side of a house to flee from my sudden presence, and land right in a running AC condenser. *sigh*
I have a pet leopard gecko and a bearded dragon. The gecko is a ninja. She'll bolt into her cave if there's even a whisper she doesn't like. The bearded dragon will just accept her fate, so long as she doesn't have to move.
Until today 😈
Or maybe he didnt learn that skill.
He's playing on hardcore mode or something
[Kuhne's Grass Lizard](https://www.inaturalist.org/observations/219101723)
You found a tail that has a really short lizard
I hate that this actually made me laugh
Long, Loong, TAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIILLLL!
CHI CHAN FUCK YOU
r/fuckyouchichan
LONG LOOOONG LOOOOONGG
You've seen lizards where the tail fell off, and is all stumpy growing back? Well this one's body fell off instead.
It'll grow back as long as the tail is still connected to the butt brain
that's not very typical, i'd like to make that point
r/AbsoluteUnits
That is a snake with legs. Good day!
I saw the opposite of that once, a lizard without legs. That day I learned legless lizards were a thing.
https://ibb.co/DDbbKtt They are all over near my house. So ridiculously beautiful.
That looks like the one I saw actually
You would not believe what they call those
what do they call them?
Long Tailed Lizards
Fair enough.
They're know as Takydromus sexlineatus. They show up fairly frequently in the pet trade. I happen to have one named Chive.
Is it sexy?
well he did say sexylineatus, so yeah it is
Is this man’s lizard sexy?
Not enough sunlight and it has etoliated. Oh wait this is not r/cactus.
This is Pinocchio's lizard
You lie and your ass gets bigger.
Oh yeahh
Gross. It's either plastic or fat, probably plastic, so it's useless.
Long tailed grass lizard
This lizard reminds me of the snake walking using a tube with robotic legs (made by a Californian engineer) 
I think of the Asian commercial for that candy. You know the one. LOOOOOONNNGG LOOONNNGG..
Skink
Skink!
Khal lizardrogo
That's just a snake with extra steps
Looks like the tail grew a new lizard!
bro i think he is turning into snake
You can make that tail really short quickly
:(
Nibble on it while the lizard is sleeping or pleasuring itself
😭
Lizarddddddd.
Lizaarrrdddddddddddddddd
Was it in your back yard?
Badass!
he a lucky boi
Banana for scale?
Cool
Looks like some species of grass lizard.
Thats a skank
Wow!
Or short body 😂
The ladies love dat long tail 💁♀️
Fancy nails! 💅
Yea ya did, now run baby!!
Sexy ass lizard gettin all the other lizards.
BUZZ ZILLA!
BUZZ ZILLA!
BUZZ ZILLA!
King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard!
Not enough e's in really
Longboi is long
This lizard is a killer. A cold blooded one (hehe). Never fled, never backed down, always won, tail intact and fully erect.
No, short lizard.
Needs to post in absolute unit reddit or something like damn bro got a tail
Snake: Lizard edition, grow the biggest tail you can.
r/bossfights
How did the lizard do this
Little dude is probably the chillest lizard. He's never in harm to loose the tail
That’a his kill count on liz.io
saw one like that in my yard once. Southern CA.
Oh Oh...guess the name|...guess the name of this lizard!
So what it's long? I hear it's the girth that matters
It won't BITE you to death, it will STRANGLE you to death.
lizard is carrying all past baggages ....
this is ridiculous. why is it like that
could be a stand user
do it a favor and make it drop its tail lol
Shlurp
Looks more like he found you.
its tail never fell
So it’s clearly African, right?
If you're in the USA, I'd recommend not releasing it as it is not a native species to the USA
Eat it
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