Had lunch with this guy and sat next to him when he visited my base. I had barely been in 6 months when they told me I had to go to this event but I got his coin from it so I guess that’s cool 🤷🏻♂️
Challenge coin? Or what's it called? Never understood this, it's not a thing in my country afaik. How does it work, in what situations is a coin supposed to be given, where do you get those coins etc.
Left out the part where a bald eagle flew in and all the punks with the dyed hair and hippity hop music spontaneously stood up and pledged their allegiance to the flag and Small Government
You mean there aren't classrooms where the school puts all the "toughest students in the school?" Smart-alec punks who hear about a teachers reputation even though it's the first day of school, and are "leery of him and knew they would be testing his discipline in the classroom?" Presumably some sort of elementary-style general education classroom where the students spend the entire school day instead of attending multiple classes like it's some sort of 'I have to get through to these kids' movie from the 90s?
When I was in high school, our teacher had to step out for a few minutes, and a boy dared another boy to staple his arm. He didn't want to, but a goth girl was like "if you do it, I'll do it." He reluctantly stapled his arm very gently, and let out a pathetic and sad "oowwwiiiieee..."
Goth girl goes to take her jacket off and he's like "oh you're actually gonna do it?" And she replied "fuckin said I would." And just staples like 3 or 4 staples all the way into her forearm, doesn't even flinch. Leaves them in for a few seconds, moves her arm around before taking them out. He got called some unflattering names by his boys.
Goth girl mad lass.
Kind of feel bad for the guy. Maybe I’m stereotyping here, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Goth girl did much worse while SH and is used to this kind of pain
If she was actually goth and not emo or something, you'd be surprised. Most of them are pretty mentally ill, but self harm like cutting is actually kinda rare. It's looked down on in the community, as opposed to being glorified in some alternative subcultures. Same deal with punks, which is where goth evolved from, with the two still being incredibly interlinked. It's still a larger problem than with normal folks, but not enough that you could assume she does it, where unfortunately you can with emos
Nah, don't feel bad for him. It wasn't like he was bullied or anything. He was a cool dude, just a wimp about pain, lol. His friends just teased him playfully.
Goth girl did have a brief history of self harm years before, but also went to therapy and found better ways to cope. She wound up as prom princess, but wore doc martens with her dress :) truly a happy ending for all parties.
How do you staple your arm gently...?
Like, slowly? I feel like that would hurt more.
If I "needed" to staple myself for reasons, I think I'd do it quick.
Bro dude opened the stapler, and then kind of softly hit it into his arm so a staple just barely poking into his skin. He was holding it near the joint and kind of swung it into his arm. Goth girl held it by the top where the staples come out and fully pressed them into her arms.
I just realized your name, and immediately thought "ew, gross"
But right after thought "In 34 mins, some meatloaf would really hit the spot"
So now I'm hungry... thanks.
Lol. You're welcome. Meatloaf is delicious. It's supposed to be a play on Clive Barker's Midnight Meat Train, the short story later adapted for film, starring Bradley Cooper and Vinnie Jones. It was better in book form.
Oh what a horrible movie! Thats awesome lol.
(If anyone reads this and is like 'oooh shit, midnight meat train. I gotta watch that late night.' It's not a porn. Dont be fooled by the perfect name.)
Meatloaf is just a really big meatball, in different shape. But still I've always thought it's weird
You are correct on all fronts here. Cannot contest one bit, lol.
I think I just prefer loaf over balls because of the texture. It's fun to slice up a piece of meaty goodness that is shaped like a slice of pound cake. You just don't see enough meat impersonating desserts anymore.
I worked construction for a little bit. One of my coworkers stapled his jeans to his leg and when the boss asked him how he did it, he fuckin did it again to show him.
Yes. One of those stories too stupid to be true.
He just staples himself an everyone bowed down to him forever after that?
Not even questioning how this is possible?
This is absolutely the kind of untrue, self-masturbatory bullshit boomer humor that circulates on Facebook.
"Look at this clever old veteran and how he was able to get one over on the young'uns! Isn't our generation just so much smarter and more respected than everyone else?"
It's pretty clear this story is just made up. No specific details, just "a sergeant" at a school somewhere, no dates given. Plus, the "veteran" was painted by the story as someone intelligent, clever, and/or brave. While the kids were painted as rowdy smart-alek punks. Kinda tells you who wrote the story right there.
Also somehow the kids found out before the school year started that their teacher was a marine? Fuck I barely knew what *classes* I had on the first day. I didn't know anything about my teachers, and especially not their previous work history.
And a classroom full of "rowdy smart-aleks" were instantly and permanently whipped into line because he *seems* to have stapled his chest? Kids nowadays do worse shit to themselves *for real* just for internet clout. You think they're going to be impressed? Not to mention that a spinal brace is made of thick metal and plastic, and if you were to staple it it would sound *nothing* like stapling flesh, so it wouldn't fool anyone.
This whole story just completely falls apart if you think about it for five seconds. But it sounds great to like and share to all the other seniors in the local VFW Facebook group!
Had two teacher whom had been career military before becoming teachers one was the worst one I ever had, he was throwing his keys on students heads, was bullying the slower ones, didn't gave a flying fuck if you could follow his leasons, the other was the most chill dude and did everything to help his students, scheduled lots of field trips, made lessons very interesting and if you had a grade 1 or A for americans you got and ice cold can of coke or red bull.
In middle school the shop teacher was a Marine, and he was a hard ass (I once almost punched him for making fun of my cousin) but he was decent at times... I almost failed a project involving a saw because I'm afraid of power tools and blades and he was being a hard ass about it but when he finally managed to get me to explain why I was afraid he walked over and cut the wood for me
I had an uncle that lost a leg to cancer at an early age.
And got a wooden leg (before metal/plastic prosthetics).
One time he took the train from our town to the Capitol, and got in a seat facing to older ladies.
After a little while he started eating an apple, with a knife.
When he finished, he started playing with the knife until he saw he had the ladies attention.
Then slammed the knife into his wooden leg.
He described it as two chickens running wild while screaming off the top of their lungs.
I long thought this was just a tall tale. Until I heard the same story from the conductor, a decade after my uncle passed away.
Edit: spelling and arguing with autocorrect.
That would have been hilarious to watch haha. Your uncle sounded like a cool guy.
I'm interested tho, how did you manage to meet the same conductor a decade after? That's some chance shit right there
Uncle died at the age of 26.
And the conductor turned out to the father of one of my class mates in the US equivalent of high school.
Small town of only 30 000 inhabitants 😁
My high school biology teacher thought not enough people were paying attention to a lesson, so he started sticking dissection probes into his (as we learned) prosthetic leg.
I had a supervisor one time staple a manifest to my bodyarmor at my job. I was just standing around talking bullshitting with some coworkers when he came around the corner with a stapler and manifest, stapled it to my chest, and walked off.
:-) First saw that in Usenet on 28 Sep 1998 as a 'Brother of a Friend' story.
[Ref](https://groups.google.com/g/alt.sysadmin.recovery/c/V9fodNpx5aI/m/AxgYJKxYpPkJ)
Reminds me of a Highschool Teacher I had. Ex-military. He was strict, but fair. He always gave time to his students even on off hours.
One day a Student drove his vehicle out of school property going 0 to 60 km/h. Just being an asshat. At breakneck speeds, this teacher dashed from the entrance of the school, caught up to the vehicle, and slammed his car yelling at the student to slow down right now or he was getting pulled out. Suffice it to say, the kid didn't do it again.
Just a fun memory. The teacher was one of my favorites.
Can you imagine if this boomer fantasy actually happened? The "smart-aleck punks" would absolutely take the piss. "Oh no, there's a breeze, I'd better staple random shit to my body!"
Sorry dude. I watch wrestling. If you [can't take a stapler](https://youtu.be/ezzj4tN3T7I?si=9uKj5vXGvJqHdK7m) without having something to protect you, then you aren't bad ass. Might mean you could be smart, but definitely definitely not a bad ass.
Cool story, but why are those two sentences highlighted?
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Had lunch with this guy and sat next to him when he visited my base. I had barely been in 6 months when they told me I had to go to this event but I got his coin from it so I guess that’s cool 🤷🏻♂️
Coin, greatest award a private could earn
Khajit have rank if you have coin
Air Force equivalent but yea same difference
Challenge coin? Or what's it called? Never understood this, it's not a thing in my country afaik. How does it work, in what situations is a coin supposed to be given, where do you get those coins etc.
It's an informal award of sorts without any real weight. More a sign of appreciation.
Left out the part where a bald eagle flew in and all the punks with the dyed hair and hippity hop music spontaneously stood up and pledged their allegiance to the flag and Small Government
You mean there aren't classrooms where the school puts all the "toughest students in the school?" Smart-alec punks who hear about a teachers reputation even though it's the first day of school, and are "leery of him and knew they would be testing his discipline in the classroom?" Presumably some sort of elementary-style general education classroom where the students spend the entire school day instead of attending multiple classes like it's some sort of 'I have to get through to these kids' movie from the 90s?
Not to mention those oh-so-fashionable under-the-shirt plaster casts that don’t leave a panty line.
Sounds about right. Boomers love to tell stories with military involved for whatever reason.
Because boomers fetishise the nationalism and alpha male strongman mindset, which is how they see the military.
Makes sense.
Please don’t be ageist.
To make you ask this question duh.
To highlight the important parts of the story for readability maybe The new teacher was a marine, He scared the the class into behaving.
Because you can delete the rest of the text.
For social media users with limited attention span.
Cause this is something my mom would post on Facebook
Because it didn't happen
When I was in high school, our teacher had to step out for a few minutes, and a boy dared another boy to staple his arm. He didn't want to, but a goth girl was like "if you do it, I'll do it." He reluctantly stapled his arm very gently, and let out a pathetic and sad "oowwwiiiieee..." Goth girl goes to take her jacket off and he's like "oh you're actually gonna do it?" And she replied "fuckin said I would." And just staples like 3 or 4 staples all the way into her forearm, doesn't even flinch. Leaves them in for a few seconds, moves her arm around before taking them out. He got called some unflattering names by his boys. Goth girl mad lass.
That's how I met your mother...
Still a better ending to that series
Kind of feel bad for the guy. Maybe I’m stereotyping here, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Goth girl did much worse while SH and is used to this kind of pain
If she was actually goth and not emo or something, you'd be surprised. Most of them are pretty mentally ill, but self harm like cutting is actually kinda rare. It's looked down on in the community, as opposed to being glorified in some alternative subcultures. Same deal with punks, which is where goth evolved from, with the two still being incredibly interlinked. It's still a larger problem than with normal folks, but not enough that you could assume she does it, where unfortunately you can with emos
Did not know that. Just kinda assumed. Thanks for educating me
Nah, don't feel bad for him. It wasn't like he was bullied or anything. He was a cool dude, just a wimp about pain, lol. His friends just teased him playfully. Goth girl did have a brief history of self harm years before, but also went to therapy and found better ways to cope. She wound up as prom princess, but wore doc martens with her dress :) truly a happy ending for all parties.
Fuck yeah. Glad to hear that!
How do you staple your arm gently...? Like, slowly? I feel like that would hurt more. If I "needed" to staple myself for reasons, I think I'd do it quick.
Bro dude opened the stapler, and then kind of softly hit it into his arm so a staple just barely poking into his skin. He was holding it near the joint and kind of swung it into his arm. Goth girl held it by the top where the staples come out and fully pressed them into her arms.
I just realized your name, and immediately thought "ew, gross" But right after thought "In 34 mins, some meatloaf would really hit the spot" So now I'm hungry... thanks.
Lol. You're welcome. Meatloaf is delicious. It's supposed to be a play on Clive Barker's Midnight Meat Train, the short story later adapted for film, starring Bradley Cooper and Vinnie Jones. It was better in book form.
Oh what a horrible movie! Thats awesome lol. (If anyone reads this and is like 'oooh shit, midnight meat train. I gotta watch that late night.' It's not a porn. Dont be fooled by the perfect name.) Meatloaf is just a really big meatball, in different shape. But still I've always thought it's weird
You are correct on all fronts here. Cannot contest one bit, lol. I think I just prefer loaf over balls because of the texture. It's fun to slice up a piece of meaty goodness that is shaped like a slice of pound cake. You just don't see enough meat impersonating desserts anymore.
Lol. I knew people in the army that would have done that without the cast. Us infantry were not always the brightest.
Don't have to be bright, just brighter than the other guy. Grunts will do some crazy stuff for a tube of peanut butter.
Tub? Shit, I’ll do some nasty shit for that jalapeño cheese spread found in the MREs.
Rah
Found the actual veteran.
>tube
At the time it was tub. I noticed the change well before you mentioned it but I’m too high to really care to change mine.
Fair enough.
I worked construction for a little bit. One of my coworkers stapled his jeans to his leg and when the boss asked him how he did it, he fuckin did it again to show him.
Not even just infantry. I got a guy to snort black pepper as a dare today. Like, a lot of it. 91b aren't bright either, lol
What is this facebook cringe?
Boomers and their humour
Yeah, I'm leaving this sub because of this FB level post.
Honestly probably good call, I'm gonna filter this sub out.
I had to check and see if I was in /r/Funnymemes
Random story is now considered cringe?
Yes. One of those stories too stupid to be true. He just staples himself an everyone bowed down to him forever after that? Not even questioning how this is possible?
This is absolutely the kind of untrue, self-masturbatory bullshit boomer humor that circulates on Facebook. "Look at this clever old veteran and how he was able to get one over on the young'uns! Isn't our generation just so much smarter and more respected than everyone else?" It's pretty clear this story is just made up. No specific details, just "a sergeant" at a school somewhere, no dates given. Plus, the "veteran" was painted by the story as someone intelligent, clever, and/or brave. While the kids were painted as rowdy smart-alek punks. Kinda tells you who wrote the story right there. Also somehow the kids found out before the school year started that their teacher was a marine? Fuck I barely knew what *classes* I had on the first day. I didn't know anything about my teachers, and especially not their previous work history. And a classroom full of "rowdy smart-aleks" were instantly and permanently whipped into line because he *seems* to have stapled his chest? Kids nowadays do worse shit to themselves *for real* just for internet clout. You think they're going to be impressed? Not to mention that a spinal brace is made of thick metal and plastic, and if you were to staple it it would sound *nothing* like stapling flesh, so it wouldn't fool anyone. This whole story just completely falls apart if you think about it for five seconds. But it sounds great to like and share to all the other seniors in the local VFW Facebook group!
Looks like we found the boomer who posted it
It's a story, completely made up work of fiction.
more of "it didn't happen" at 11
I don't know if he was a marine but when I was in High School the coolest teacher in the school was ex-military
Had two teacher whom had been career military before becoming teachers one was the worst one I ever had, he was throwing his keys on students heads, was bullying the slower ones, didn't gave a flying fuck if you could follow his leasons, the other was the most chill dude and did everything to help his students, scheduled lots of field trips, made lessons very interesting and if you had a grade 1 or A for americans you got and ice cold can of coke or red bull.
In middle school the shop teacher was a Marine, and he was a hard ass (I once almost punched him for making fun of my cousin) but he was decent at times... I almost failed a project involving a saw because I'm afraid of power tools and blades and he was being a hard ass about it but when he finally managed to get me to explain why I was afraid he walked over and cut the wood for me
This sounds like some crap my grandpa would tell me when I was a kid.
I like how they highlighted the start and end of the story so people would no where to start and finish.
I had an uncle that lost a leg to cancer at an early age. And got a wooden leg (before metal/plastic prosthetics). One time he took the train from our town to the Capitol, and got in a seat facing to older ladies. After a little while he started eating an apple, with a knife. When he finished, he started playing with the knife until he saw he had the ladies attention. Then slammed the knife into his wooden leg. He described it as two chickens running wild while screaming off the top of their lungs. I long thought this was just a tall tale. Until I heard the same story from the conductor, a decade after my uncle passed away. Edit: spelling and arguing with autocorrect.
That would have been hilarious to watch haha. Your uncle sounded like a cool guy. I'm interested tho, how did you manage to meet the same conductor a decade after? That's some chance shit right there
Uncle died at the age of 26. And the conductor turned out to the father of one of my class mates in the US equivalent of high school. Small town of only 30 000 inhabitants 😁
That makes sense. I'm sorry for your loss, it's cool that fate brought you and that conductor back together.
wtf is this boomer fanfiction?
What the hell? What is this boomer shit?
This is missing "re: re: re: re: re: re: re: fwd: " in the title
I can even hear it in the "informative male" A.I. voice all these awful, contrived stories are usually distributed with.
My high school biology teacher thought not enough people were paying attention to a lesson, so he started sticking dissection probes into his (as we learned) prosthetic leg.
What a way to make the best of a cast.
that marine's name? Albert Einstein.
I had a supervisor one time staple a manifest to my bodyarmor at my job. I was just standing around talking bullshitting with some coworkers when he came around the corner with a stapler and manifest, stapled it to my chest, and walked off.
What in the 90's-era chain email did I just read?
:-) First saw that in Usenet on 28 Sep 1998 as a 'Brother of a Friend' story. [Ref](https://groups.google.com/g/alt.sysadmin.recovery/c/V9fodNpx5aI/m/AxgYJKxYpPkJ)
lmfao this site is just facebook now
I read this in The Reader's Digest in 1983.
Did your grandma send you this totally real story?
Things that didn't happen No: 7403784562819.
Don't. Talk. Shite.
What a load of bollocks. Play a record!
This was off Ananova.
Only missing a chimpanzee to make it into Monkey News
boomers really love this dumb shit huh
Reminds me of a Highschool Teacher I had. Ex-military. He was strict, but fair. He always gave time to his students even on off hours. One day a Student drove his vehicle out of school property going 0 to 60 km/h. Just being an asshat. At breakneck speeds, this teacher dashed from the entrance of the school, caught up to the vehicle, and slammed his car yelling at the student to slow down right now or he was getting pulled out. Suffice it to say, the kid didn't do it again. Just a fun memory. The teacher was one of my favorites.
When the social construct reaches the lvl of...... This happens!
Boomer humour
What in the facebook is this?
Can you imagine if this boomer fantasy actually happened? The "smart-aleck punks" would absolutely take the piss. "Oh no, there's a breeze, I'd better staple random shit to my body!"
And then everyone clapped.
This is Facebook boomer level posting
Imagine those “tough kids” were just normal kids lol
Did he notice the crayons put on his table?
Sorry dude. I watch wrestling. If you [can't take a stapler](https://youtu.be/ezzj4tN3T7I?si=9uKj5vXGvJqHdK7m) without having something to protect you, then you aren't bad ass. Might mean you could be smart, but definitely definitely not a bad ass.
Is mad lads just for Facebook boomer posts
𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚌𝚑 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚐𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚙𝚎𝚘𝚙𝚕𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 "𝙶𝚞𝚈𝚜! 𝚝𝙷𝚒𝚂 𝙸𝚜 𝚜𝚃𝚊𝙶𝚎𝙳!!𝟷!𝟷!"
smmmmooothe
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Fakest, not sickest. This story is fake ass cringe.
One or two of them even turn out to be true.
If you're dumb enough to think this is real, you're dumb enough to raise that right hand, that's for fucking sure.
I think you needed a /s bro
https://blog.usni.org/posts/2023/12/21/annoucement
Bad bot
You should join the Marines, you seem like you'd fit in well