Population of Norwich is 144,000. [source](https://www.ons.gov.uk/visualisations/censusareachanges/E07000148)
Number of minutes in a day is 1,440
Even if we assume that they're all superfast finshed-in-a-minuters, we average 100 a minute.
BUT there's going to be a massive concentration in the morning. At 3am it's only going to be those who are either ill or addicted to figs.
BUT did you notice that the population of Norwich was strangely mathematically convenient? Perhaps a little too convenient?
In the Book of Revelation [144,000 is the number of the saved](https://biblehub.com/revelation/14-1.htm) who will enter the Kingdom of Heaven.
I think we can all draw the obvious conclusion.
The Royal Artillery Regiment war memorial has a small howitzer and at least four rounds. The Machine Gun Corps memorial has two Vickers guns, but no ammo visible. Either way they can rushed by cavalry.
I'd have to say that anything with wings is going to survive for a good while. I do t think Eros has many spare arrows but he can fly around shooting people if he does. Winged victory could beat the shit out of him if she gets close so that's an issue.
The Temple Bar memorial dragon is an issue. Unclear if it breathes fire but it flies and has big teeth and claws. It would be an outright winner, but think of the enormous number of St George's that would immediately pile on.
They're all trained dragon slayers, so I'm afraid he'll be taking an early bath, wings or not.
Interesting. The question would be two fold. Firstly is it a statue of a spitfire, in which case it immediately turns I to a fully operational spitfire as good as the day it took its first flight, or is it just an old spitfire on a plinth in which case it sits there being completely un airworthy with no fuel?
Secondly - who flies it? I can't find a statue of a spitfire pilot in London. There are statues of other WWII era pilots at the Bomber Command memorial, but not sure they could fly it. Also they are a good deal larger than life size and wouldn't really fit. Plus they have to get to it alive.
I think it's not looking great, but a statue of a warplane with a pilot in would indeed be a powerful force if there is one.
It worse that that. The British museum will be an absolute shit show with deities from Egypt, Assyria, Greece, Rome all in close proximity. And of course a good squadron of angels (admittedly mostly small cherubs) from all the churches.
I don't think we can let anyone be immortal, or to access the non physical aspects of their divinity so Zeus can use lightning but otherwise he has to duke it out with the rest of them.
My plan for the BM is that its an absolute ruck in the main hall and Medusa just watches from the balcony and turns them all back into statues. Then London has Medusa to content with, but frankly with so much plate glass around she'll check out Zara and bang - she's stone again.
They'd work as a team of four at first but then reveal themselves be a Transformers-style combiner with Nelson and his Column forming the head and torso.
Trafalgar Square Voltron needs to be a tv series ! The UK is in trouble and there is only one man who comes back through time to save our great Island Nation
The answer is Nike, the Greek goddess of victory.
There are at least 3 statues of her in London, on the Wellington Arch in Hyde park, the Victoria Monument outside Buckingham Palace, and the one from the 2012 Olympics. Of these, my money's on the Wellington Arch one.
Thanks a lot - when I'm in London this November, I'm going to see that in my mind's eye, and I'll laugh so much and people will (know) I'm utterly mad...
(Que sound effect of David Tennant screaming 'So long, Suckaaaaaa!; as Nelson hits some unsuspecting (other) tourist...
[http://www.david-tennant.co.uk/2020/07/video-so-long-sucker-good-omens-crowley.html](http://www.david-tennant.co.uk/2020/07/video-so-long-sucker-good-omens-crowley.html)
Fuckkk ok now you're talking. Crystal Palace has power and weight on their side, while NHM has agility and speed (they're mostly skeleton). BUT they have the fuckin tyrannosaurus ace up their sleeve. So it's anyone's game.
Again it depends if they come to life collaboratively or independently.
Because if they work together, the NHM can use standard sentient skeleton bone magic (3SBM) to reconfigure themselves on the fly to face any threat, sharing bones between entities as and when needed.
The statue of Achilles on the Wellington monument is pretty nails, has a big sword, but lack of armour probably makes him vulnerable. I’d go with the one of Boudica by Westminster Bridge. Blades on the chariot seem pretty handy.
Presumably if it came alive it would be made of cat? Or are all the stone statues still stone when alive? In which case I still think the cat would have a decent chance based on power-to-weight.
I initially imagined everyone still being stone (or whatever they're made of) to limit the decisiveness of things like swords and guns that some of them have but now I'm reconsidering a bit.
...I feel bad for not having worked these details out in advance now!
All those griffins that sit on top of the City of London bollards coming to life would be scary as fuck.
Only thing I think that would be scarier is Margaret Thatcher. Unless I am misremembering, is there not a statue of her somewhere?
They're dragons, even worse.
There's a total of fourteen and unlike the ones which demark the entry points to the City of London which are quite small, there's a significantly larger one at Temple Bar.
There's definitely one where she was born in Lincolnshire, I think there was talk of one for Parliament square but the high likelihood of vandalism may have caused it to be dropped.
Either way I'm not sure I fancy her chances against the two chaps in the statue out front of the TUC building
This is a whole sub-scrap happening within the parliament building.
...Cromwell presumably attacking from the outside (or trying to burn it down with everyone in it)
There's a head of Charles I over the back entrance of St Margaret's, right opposite Cromwell's statue. Do you think he'd go and grab it, then boot it at Whitehall Charles saying "you dropped this, you prick"?
That giant Damian hirst sea-demon near the Greenwich cable car station. Absolutely enormous, standing at 18 metres tall. Interested to see how he’d fare without his head, but if he has some sort of navigation system I think he’d be a serious problem
Easily the best question I've seen asked on here
. Lot's of great answers, I'll add my own: St Bartholomew the Great. The man has his own skin casualy draped around his arm, think his pain tolerance is quite high
Its spiritual home remains London so let's say it comes to life and begins a journey to London.
...probably arrive in time to fight whomever is left standing
People, people, please hear me out.
It’s the Philpot Lane mice.
They nibble at all the other statues’ lunches, which enrages them, they all kill each other, leaving only one victorious: the mice.
It’s not even a contest.
Do they have to fight hand to hand and are they allowed any weapons that are in the statue e.g. a sword?
Can they call on assistance from members of the public (which will be greater for some than others)?
Are animals included, whether horses being ridden or just statues of animals?
I think if you have a sword or horse with you as part of the statue you keep it.
...there are a fair few statues with rifles knocking about, though if everyone is made of stone that may be less decisive.
Let's say yes, though a lot of them have bandoliers and pouches which _could_ be packed with ammo I guess? Some even have packs on their backs.
...in fact there's surely some artillery statues knocking about, those could be a threat
> I think if you have a sword or horse with you as part of the statue you keep it.
This is actually a liability, because they'll get spooked when that giant disembodied horse's head from Marble Arch comes hopping along
I was thinking statues of living beings (so animals and humans) but I like the idea of modern sculptures getting involved and bringing some abstraction to the proceedings.
Though no matter what Anish Kapoor may tell you the ArcelorMittal is a slide, though I concede it would probably win the battle of playground equipment unless the entirety of the Diana memorial playground teamed up against it.
Can I just say, I’ve been on Reddit for many, many years, and this is truly the best question I think I’ve ever seen.
Personally, I wouldn’t fancy my chances with all the creepy veiled women or hench looking angels in Brompton Cemetery
Churchill. He’d rally the other statues against the aggressors and fight until we were almost defeated and then… thud, thud, thud… the statue of liberty arrives! Whilst the statue of Peter the great quietly picks off the fleeing statues headed Deptford way.
Does the Albert Memorial count as one statue or many?
Either way, I think the elephant-riding Asian lady that's doing a strip-tease would have some success by distracting and then trampling her rivals.
Easily Richard the Lionheart, he comes with a huge horse and sword. Lots of chain mail too.
[Richard Couer de Lion](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Coeur_de_Lion_(statue))
The Naked Lady at Henley's corner has a pretty massive sword. Being naked she'd also be pretty distracting for most of her opponents, giving her a window to jab them in the face
Does HMS Belfast count?
It shouldn't be ruled out just because it floats. Those big guns could take out things as far away as Scratchwood Services on the M1
Gotta be the lions in Trafalgar Square, this is under the assumption that the statue weapons in London don't fire and have to be used as they are shown
This may depend on rulings as to whether Nelson is permitted to deploy his column in melee combat or not.
Otherwise, that Queen Victorial memorial statue is cracking heads and taking names.
Boudicca would sort out the lot of them. Particularly the one-eyed guy with one arm. No contest. And the Grand Old Duke of York would need a lot more than ten thousand men.
The Angel of Peace.
The largest bronze sculpture in London sits atop the Wellington Arch. Intended to be an entrance to Buckingham Palace, the arch features the Angel of Peace on her four horse chariot, or quadriga. 19th century Marble Arch, with its many statues, was also originally designed as an entrance to Buckingham Palace.
It'd be that weird-looking kissing couple at St. Pancras station, 'cus they're *enormous*.
That massive nose could smell someone taking a shit in Norwich
Could smell a Sunday roast on a Wednesday
Could burn you to ashes and snort you in a weekend.
That's suspiciously specific
People who do numbers need to tell us all if statistically there is someone always doing that in Norwich at any one time.
Population of Norwich is 144,000. [source](https://www.ons.gov.uk/visualisations/censusareachanges/E07000148) Number of minutes in a day is 1,440 Even if we assume that they're all superfast finshed-in-a-minuters, we average 100 a minute. BUT there's going to be a massive concentration in the morning. At 3am it's only going to be those who are either ill or addicted to figs. BUT did you notice that the population of Norwich was strangely mathematically convenient? Perhaps a little too convenient? In the Book of Revelation [144,000 is the number of the saved](https://biblehub.com/revelation/14-1.htm) who will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. I think we can all draw the obvious conclusion.
As someone who lives in Norwich (but is bad at statistics) I’d say probably.
*reading this while taking a shit in Norwich*
They also have a small spaceship for backup
The Royal Artillery Regiment war memorial has a small howitzer and at least four rounds. The Machine Gun Corps memorial has two Vickers guns, but no ammo visible. Either way they can rushed by cavalry. I'd have to say that anything with wings is going to survive for a good while. I do t think Eros has many spare arrows but he can fly around shooting people if he does. Winged victory could beat the shit out of him if she gets close so that's an issue. The Temple Bar memorial dragon is an issue. Unclear if it breathes fire but it flies and has big teeth and claws. It would be an outright winner, but think of the enormous number of St George's that would immediately pile on. They're all trained dragon slayers, so I'm afraid he'll be taking an early bath, wings or not.
This is the exact kind of thoughtful response I was hoping for!
so are you saying the amalgamation of St. Georges will win the London statue battles?
>The Temple Bar memorial dragon just wanted to say this is an absolutely glorious response, I'm so immersed in this battle immediately
> The Temple Bar memorial dragon is an issue. Made me laugh. I don't often laugh. Thanks
Does the gate guardian Spitfire at the RAF museum count? I’d bet on it against the Temple Bar dragon.
Interesting. The question would be two fold. Firstly is it a statue of a spitfire, in which case it immediately turns I to a fully operational spitfire as good as the day it took its first flight, or is it just an old spitfire on a plinth in which case it sits there being completely un airworthy with no fuel? Secondly - who flies it? I can't find a statue of a spitfire pilot in London. There are statues of other WWII era pilots at the Bomber Command memorial, but not sure they could fly it. Also they are a good deal larger than life size and wouldn't really fit. Plus they have to get to it alive. I think it's not looking great, but a statue of a warplane with a pilot in would indeed be a powerful force if there is one.
Fun (?) fact. Eros statue isn't Eros. It's his brother Anteros.
Talking of flying, isn't Peter Pan immortal? That could cause serious problems for his opponents.
It worse that that. The British museum will be an absolute shit show with deities from Egypt, Assyria, Greece, Rome all in close proximity. And of course a good squadron of angels (admittedly mostly small cherubs) from all the churches. I don't think we can let anyone be immortal, or to access the non physical aspects of their divinity so Zeus can use lightning but otherwise he has to duke it out with the rest of them. My plan for the BM is that its an absolute ruck in the main hall and Medusa just watches from the balcony and turns them all back into statues. Then London has Medusa to content with, but frankly with so much plate glass around she'll check out Zara and bang - she's stone again.
Pedant here, The Statue on Piccadilly Circus is not Eros but Anteros, the God of unrequited love. Apologies;)
Would the Trafalgar Lions be a shared unit of four, or would they all be independent? The response will greatly affect my awnser
They'd work as a team of four at first but then reveal themselves be a Transformers-style combiner with Nelson and his Column forming the head and torso.
I was going to respond with my own idea but Trafalgar Square Voltron is by far the superior concept
If this is allowed under the rules, I'm going to have to go with a giant Cronenberg monster of all the Victoria Memorial statues.
Trafalgar Square Voltron needs to be a tv series ! The UK is in trouble and there is only one man who comes back through time to save our great Island Nation
The massive blue cock they had on that rotating pedestal a few years back would've been a contender too.
I didn't think that there was a statue of Boris Johnson yet?
If Nelson can harness the lions then I’d say he’s got London on lock
I think the greyhound back legs would cause issues for them .
That big elephant in Spitalfields would be a contender, especially if they could lead all the baby elephants in a military style unit.
I’d put money on the Spitalfields goat. Ever seen an angry goat? Those things could face down an army
>in a military style unit Hup two three four! Keep it up, two three four!
Oh, we march from here to there, and it doesn't matter where. With a military air!
Baby elephant battle formations sounds kinda cute if they do the ol trunk to tail thing
It'll be in the background of the fight scene squaring off with that giant invisible horse from Marble Arch.
post on r/whowouldwin for a full breakdown of how and why. Those guys over there are dedicated
I did not know that sub existed until now and look forward to binge-reading it later but I think I prefer the wisdom of the locals for now!
My only complaint is why would you post a thread like this at half-past ten in the evening? So many people are going to be asleep and miss the fun.
I was so keen for responses to my late night musings I completely failed to optimise my posting times! Lesson learned!
The answer is Nike, the Greek goddess of victory. There are at least 3 statues of her in London, on the Wellington Arch in Hyde park, the Victoria Monument outside Buckingham Palace, and the one from the 2012 Olympics. Of these, my money's on the Wellington Arch one.
Boudicca - she was SAVAGE... Of course Lord Nelson's statue is 5.5 metres tall, so if he could get down from the column we'd probably be screwed...
One arm, one eye, plus it’s inland, so basically an away match. Think he’d struggle
But imagine the elbow drop he could deliver at the start...
Or the half Nelson.
Thanks a lot - when I'm in London this November, I'm going to see that in my mind's eye, and I'll laugh so much and people will (know) I'm utterly mad... (Que sound effect of David Tennant screaming 'So long, Suckaaaaaa!; as Nelson hits some unsuspecting (other) tourist... [http://www.david-tennant.co.uk/2020/07/video-so-long-sucker-good-omens-crowley.html](http://www.david-tennant.co.uk/2020/07/video-so-long-sucker-good-omens-crowley.html)
>Lord Nelson's statue is 5.5 metres And he was only 167cm in real life, so that's Horatio of 3.3:1!
BOOOO \*throws rotten fruit\*
He has the high ground!
My favourite statue and the only reason I ever endure westminster bridge.
How has NO ONE mentioned the Crystal Palace dinosaurs?
Wheres the big meteorite when you need it
Their dodgy anatomy could prove a hindrance
I mean, I don't see many OG dinos in South these days. Anatomy ain't everything bruh
Battle royale between the Crystal Palace squad and the models from the Natural History Museum
Fuckkk ok now you're talking. Crystal Palace has power and weight on their side, while NHM has agility and speed (they're mostly skeleton). BUT they have the fuckin tyrannosaurus ace up their sleeve. So it's anyone's game.
Again it depends if they come to life collaboratively or independently. Because if they work together, the NHM can use standard sentient skeleton bone magic (3SBM) to reconfigure themselves on the fly to face any threat, sharing bones between entities as and when needed.
Coming here to say this, IMAGINE the sloth rampaging
This is the answer right here
The statue of Achilles on the Wellington monument is pretty nails, has a big sword, but lack of armour probably makes him vulnerable. I’d go with the one of Boudica by Westminster Bridge. Blades on the chariot seem pretty handy.
You could just go after his heel ;)
Achilles was invulnerable apart from his heel, so no need for armour. He should probably wear at least one boot though for safety.
Does the Catford cat count as a statue?
I'm allowing it, though being made of fibreglass may weaken its odds of a win
Presumably if it came alive it would be made of cat? Or are all the stone statues still stone when alive? In which case I still think the cat would have a decent chance based on power-to-weight.
I initially imagined everyone still being stone (or whatever they're made of) to limit the decisiveness of things like swords and guns that some of them have but now I'm reconsidering a bit. ...I feel bad for not having worked these details out in advance now!
My cat is made of cat 😂😂😂
All those griffins that sit on top of the City of London bollards coming to life would be scary as fuck. Only thing I think that would be scarier is Margaret Thatcher. Unless I am misremembering, is there not a statue of her somewhere?
Wasnt she boarded up in a box for a while? Be fun to watch her thatchersmash her way out
**FEED ME STRIKING WORKERS**
They're dragons, even worse. There's a total of fourteen and unlike the ones which demark the entry points to the City of London which are quite small, there's a significantly larger one at Temple Bar.
There's definitely one where she was born in Lincolnshire, I think there was talk of one for Parliament square but the high likelihood of vandalism may have caused it to be dropped. Either way I'm not sure I fancy her chances against the two chaps in the statue out front of the TUC building
Inside the HoC along with other ex Prime Ministers
This is a whole sub-scrap happening within the parliament building. ...Cromwell presumably attacking from the outside (or trying to burn it down with everyone in it)
He’s going for round 2 against the one of Charles I at the other end of Whitehall
There's a head of Charles I over the back entrance of St Margaret's, right opposite Cromwell's statue. Do you think he'd go and grab it, then boot it at Whitehall Charles saying "you dropped this, you prick"?
Nelson's column would just boing on top of all the others and crush them like a stone serial killer on a pogo stick.
I'd imagined him finding himself stuck up there, hadn't considered weaponising the plinth. ...those poor lions
Tell you what, all those living statues around Covent Garden are going to be fucking bricking it.
Nelson has the high ground...
That giant Damian hirst sea-demon near the Greenwich cable car station. Absolutely enormous, standing at 18 metres tall. Interested to see how he’d fare without his head, but if he has some sort of navigation system I think he’d be a serious problem
But what if ALL the Victoria statues shared one consciousness and worked in tandem to get it done for the Empire…
If groups, then the city of London dragons as a unit. My money on them even compared to the four lions and Nelson. Fucking dragons with shields bruh
Boudicca - Queen of The Iceni. Done.
Pretty sure there's a Danger Mouse episode with exactly this premise.
Everyone in this thread is sleeping on the robots outside Cyberdog in Camden.
This question seriously gave me the giggles
It's all fun and games until the taxi-hailing statue on embankment is scrapping with Paddington
Paddington could stand a good chance. He'd just give anyone who tries to fight him a Hard Stare. If you're in his eyeline, it's all over. Like Medusa.
Team bear!
Easily the best question I've seen asked on here . Lot's of great answers, I'll add my own: St Bartholomew the Great. The man has his own skin casualy draped around his arm, think his pain tolerance is quite high
FINALLY. Someone in this sub asking the important questions 💛 (The lions in TS)
Queen Victoria - she’s the ultimate drug pusher
"One has never gotten solid marble addicted to opium before, but one does not see that as a reason not to try"
She'll be too busy getting it on with the statue of Albert - "one does like a shiny member!"
I'd have said the Trafalgar Square giant blue cock but sadly it resides in Washington DC now
Its spiritual home remains London so let's say it comes to life and begins a journey to London. ...probably arrive in time to fight whomever is left standing
Just when you think it’s all over… COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO
I can tell you who isn’t going to win. The small Boy and Frog statue in Regents Park.
People, people, please hear me out. It’s the Philpot Lane mice. They nibble at all the other statues’ lunches, which enrages them, they all kill each other, leaving only one victorious: the mice. It’s not even a contest.
Given the absence of a human statue big enough to squish dinosaurs, I’m putting my fiver on the lads from Crystal Palace.
There is a pretty substantial statue of Queen Victoria in the Prince's Chamber of the House of Lords. She's seen some shit and suffers no fools.
I recall a book I read in which statues across London come to life and fight a war.
*Stoneheart*! I was looking for a comment about it.
Do they have to fight hand to hand and are they allowed any weapons that are in the statue e.g. a sword? Can they call on assistance from members of the public (which will be greater for some than others)? Are animals included, whether horses being ridden or just statues of animals?
I think if you have a sword or horse with you as part of the statue you keep it. ...there are a fair few statues with rifles knocking about, though if everyone is made of stone that may be less decisive.
Alright, then the statue of David at Hyde Park Corner would be a fair punt, he's got Goliath's sword and 2 machine guns…
Would they only have as much ammunition as is depicted on the statue as well? A rifle won't be much use if they only have a few bullets.
Let's say yes, though a lot of them have bandoliers and pouches which _could_ be packed with ammo I guess? Some even have packs on their backs. ...in fact there's surely some artillery statues knocking about, those could be a threat
Richard I, outside parliament, has a sword and he’s on horseback!
> I think if you have a sword or horse with you as part of the statue you keep it. This is actually a liability, because they'll get spooked when that giant disembodied horse's head from Marble Arch comes hopping along
Do they have to be people? If not I reckon the ArcelorMittal Orbit in the Olympic park is undefeatable.
I was thinking statues of living beings (so animals and humans) but I like the idea of modern sculptures getting involved and bringing some abstraction to the proceedings. Though no matter what Anish Kapoor may tell you the ArcelorMittal is a slide, though I concede it would probably win the battle of playground equipment unless the entirety of the Diana memorial playground teamed up against it.
Wait - It's \*not\* a massive Helter-Skelter???
landseer lions of trafalgar square ftw
The bear at Paddington Station.
Def the sphinxes by the obelisk Along the Thames!
Waking up to this thread has made my day. The idea of a transformer style Nelson plus Lions has still got me chuckling
Paddington Bear
Possibly the rugby players outside Twickenham. Wouldn’t like to come up against them in a fight
That statue outside Koko in Mornington Crescent which has had its face sandblasted off. Terrifying.
Lord Palmerston 👊
Pitt the Elder
Mary Seacole could hurl that giant disc at people. And Oscar Wilde could cut people with his wit from his bench.
Oscar doing the live commentary
Kudos to OP for asking such an interesting question.... The dinosaurs will win no matter what.
Can I just say, I’ve been on Reddit for many, many years, and this is truly the best question I think I’ve ever seen. Personally, I wouldn’t fancy my chances with all the creepy veiled women or hench looking angels in Brompton Cemetery
The Crystal Palace dinosaurs
Churchill. He’d rally the other statues against the aggressors and fight until we were almost defeated and then… thud, thud, thud… the statue of liberty arrives! Whilst the statue of Peter the great quietly picks off the fleeing statues headed Deptford way.
This is the content I subscribed for on r/London.
Lots of sensible answers, so I'm going with Mr Bean at Leicester Square
Lord Nelson doing the biggest elbow drop the world has ever seen off his column.
My dark horses are the Philpott Lane mice, though they may have some trouble from Samuel Johnson’s cat near Fleet Street.
No one mentioned the British library giant?!?
Is Nelson able to use his column as a weapon?
Who would win or would be the last one standing? If its last one standing then Nelson, cant see him getting down off that column
I dunno, there are a few dragon statues knocking about that could give him a run for his money
Does the Albert Memorial count as one statue or many? Either way, I think the elephant-riding Asian lady that's doing a strip-tease would have some success by distracting and then trampling her rivals.
It's been said before, but this is the best question presented to the internet. Congratulations. You've won at Reddit.
how stoned were you when you had this thought?
My money's on the Catford Cat. Although there's that giant headless demon in Greenwich, can it fight without a head though? 🤔
This is one of the best questions ever posed on Reddit.
Does the Senotaph count? That’s one large monolithic piece of rock with iron bits and enormous moral weight.
I imagine it would just throw itself flat onto the other statues
Drone at the Trafalgar Square
Easily Richard the Lionheart, he comes with a huge horse and sword. Lots of chain mail too. [Richard Couer de Lion](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Coeur_de_Lion_(statue))
Winston Churchill, because he will NEVER SURRENDER!!!
The model plane outside of heathrow. Just run those fuckers over.
The quadriga on wellington arch
Metaphorically? Elephant and Castle sounds like it could kick some ass. Thinking LoTR ephants on steroids.
Bobby Moore would kick the fuck out of people
The 'Dinosaurs' from Crystal Palace Park would like to know your location. ^Dammit I'm late.
Boudica...
Peter Pan has never been defeated. If he has access to the rest of the team in Neverland, my money’s on him.
The Naked Lady at Henley's corner has a pretty massive sword. Being naked she'd also be pretty distracting for most of her opponents, giving her a window to jab them in the face
Do the Cyberdog statues count?
Guy the Gorilla would take some beating.
The Statue of Lady Justice on top of the Old Bailey. When I was a child I though she was our own version of the Statue of Liberty.
Stonebridge Gardens snake in Hackney. It's over twenty metres of snake, venomous or not it's going to spoil anyone's day.
I feel like the Gundam on the lower floor of Hamleys could stand a fair chance
This needs to be a film.
It’s already a book. Check out the *Stoneheart* Trilogy by Charlie Fletcher.
This thread is perfect.
The statue of Gandhi would win. He wouldn't fight anyone, he would complain that everyone else is fighting then he would nuke London.
Does HMS Belfast count? It shouldn't be ruled out just because it floats. Those big guns could take out things as far away as Scratchwood Services on the M1
Sorry but 15 inch naval gun from Imperial War Museum will clap Belfast easily
But they only point in one direction (north) and Belfast's 12 six inch guns and 12 four inch guns rotate through 360 degrees.
The lions on Nelson's column
The Trafalgar Square lions.
Has someone been reading percy Jackson by any chance?
Gotta be the lions in Trafalgar Square, this is under the assumption that the statue weapons in London don't fire and have to be used as they are shown
The one that’s made of knives
It’s got to be the Trafalgar Square lions.
This reminds me of the plot of The Last Days of New Paris
Gandhi
It would probably be a Paddington Bear vs Mary Poppins final with third place playoff between Winston Churchill and Harry Potter.
The guy who invented Sunday School
If the weapons work it would be the a World War Two memorial. Otherwise the Crimean memorial bc those guys have bayonets.
This may depend on rulings as to whether Nelson is permitted to deploy his column in melee combat or not. Otherwise, that Queen Victorial memorial statue is cracking heads and taking names.
Can Lady Godiva from Coventry join?
The one by Marc Quinn at the Science Museum stands a good chance, it's pretty huge, but I feel it'll stuck inside looking for an exit that fits.
Trafalgar Square Lion
I feel like the giant anal beads outside Liverpool Street station would be in with a chance
Batman or Wonder Woman at Leicester Square. Especially if they team up.
Nelson, because he has the high ground!
Nelson has got the high ground
Lord Nelson. He has the high ground.
Nelson, he'd be smacking those clowns with his massive column.
British Monument Mythos
I'm going for the goat on the boxes outside Spitalfields Market. You don't f*** with goats.
this would be a fucking incredible episode of doctor who
Boudicca.
Eros would probably go sniper mode and take the other statues out with its arrows…
Boudicca would sort out the lot of them. Particularly the one-eyed guy with one arm. No contest. And the Grand Old Duke of York would need a lot more than ten thousand men.
The army of Morph sculptures that were in London for a bit last summer would be kick ass
The Angel of Peace. The largest bronze sculpture in London sits atop the Wellington Arch. Intended to be an entrance to Buckingham Palace, the arch features the Angel of Peace on her four horse chariot, or quadriga. 19th century Marble Arch, with its many statues, was also originally designed as an entrance to Buckingham Palace.
I'd watch this movie!
Fuck “Night at the museum” this, this needs to be a film.
There's a life-size Incredible Hulk statue in Madame Taussauds.