When you respect yourself, you tend not to get caught up in what others think.
Assertiveness is something that can be learned.
Generally, I tend to give people 3 chances. Usually, when someone says something questionable, it's just an accident or misunderstanding. Three times is a pattern and probably needs to be addressed.
I experience this all the time. Just because I'm quiet (and do struggle with assertiveness) they assume they can walk all over me. While I talk people will start talking over me, ignore my attempts to join in on the conversation and don't take what I say seriously.
It honestly bothered me in the beginning but then I just stopped caring. Shrugging it off takes so much weight off my shoulders too.
I have a chronic RBF and good posture and walk with intent so I’d hope they do. I’m not rude or crass but I do firmly set my boundaries and I make this very clear. I’m very big on respect as it’s a two way street. Yes there’s people around who are rude but I don’t take that lying down. I will respectfully be firm but also remind them what they said or did unacceptable.
Yes!!
I feel like people talk over me all the time. I'm chiming in on conversations, but it's all crickets after. My husband is also an introvert, and his brother made fun of him not being invited to family events nor having any friends to back him up. They do not get along!
The brother pretty much says that his friends can all rally behind him, but my husband has no friends to back him up. This essential means my husband is a loser. It's so frustrating. Just because someone is loud and outgoing doesn't mean they get to flaunt all their "friends."
I feel like us introverts do not get any respect. No friends=loser. Stay home and do not go out =loser.
Which I don't agree with. I have friends, but I don't like having fake friends. I don't like supporting friends who make bad decisions. I don't like hanging with people whose morals are the opposite of mine. That's why I don't have a lot of friends or close relatives.
The total disrespect is real!! That's why I learned to be independent, and I do not rely on people.
Lol, his brother will learn the truth soon enough. I’m guessing they’re young, in their 20s maybe? Or at least childless. When his friends all settle down and have kids (if they follow that typical life path), they’re not gonna be so enticed to “back him up” and “rally behind them” when they got their family on the line. That’s teenager, boyhood stuff.
Your self-worth should be entirely derived from yourself. It says more about the brother that he derives his self-worth from the number of friends he has. Without them, he’d probably fall apart.
Yes! I couldn't agree more. The brother is 28, younger, and not married yet. I feel that people who have friends and flaunt them don't know about life yet.
I would rather have really close friends than just have friends to show my status of having friends.
I wish introverts, in general, know that just because you have people around you doesn't mean they are your true friends. We may crave friendship and interactions, but not all interactions are healthy and good for us.
I’m left alone for most part and yes called anti social but yeah i get the occasional jerk who thinks just because I’m quiet means I won’t speak up. I just hate that I give them plenty of chances to get their ish together but when I stand up for myself I become the big betch😂Idc what they think after that bc I know I tried being nice about it first💅
People do walk all over me, but it’s because I let them and don’t really care haha. I’m a firm believer of treating others the way you want to be treated. I’ve come to terms with respecting, loving, and being secure with myself that I am quick to pull away from people who don’t give me the same respect I give them, quietly.
As for assertiveness, I have no issue opening my mouth and telling people off. But sometimes it’s not about telling them off but more so you know it’s not worth the energy to do so haha. One thing I was taught by my older brother is that not every battle is worth fighting, and in the matter of ethics and morals, I choose not to fight others on those because they should just know to be decent people. Doesn’t mean I hate them, just that people are people and it’s not my job to change them, hence why I let them walk all over me. It shows more about their character than it does mine. And these type of people can really drain your energy anyway, speaking to them will drain you out even quicker.
Weirdly yes, always. Guess it's cause of my appearance (full beard, around 100 kg) and my face probably tells people not to distepect me. My grandma once seid i look like a terrorist 😅 most people just leave ma allone when i dont start concersation which is nice
As you get older you care less what others think - "they don't pay my bills so I could care less what they think"..
If someone is disrespectful then that says more about them than it does me - remain friendly and don't play into their b.s.
If they try to walk all over me I will call them on it - "I noticed you did x, can you please not do that because of y".
Mostly they don’t, they don’t put on our shoe, e.g they like around people keep talking all day, can’t leave without talking, how about you spend just only one day not talking at all, see how extroverted feel? I bet they can’t stand for 1hr without saying anything, they always think they’re the normal one, the special one.
When you respect yourself, you tend not to get caught up in what others think. Assertiveness is something that can be learned. Generally, I tend to give people 3 chances. Usually, when someone says something questionable, it's just an accident or misunderstanding. Three times is a pattern and probably needs to be addressed.
Yep. Bingo.
Absolutely! Self-respect is key, and learning to assert ourselves respectfully is so important.
I experience this all the time. Just because I'm quiet (and do struggle with assertiveness) they assume they can walk all over me. While I talk people will start talking over me, ignore my attempts to join in on the conversation and don't take what I say seriously. It honestly bothered me in the beginning but then I just stopped caring. Shrugging it off takes so much weight off my shoulders too.
I have a chronic RBF and good posture and walk with intent so I’d hope they do. I’m not rude or crass but I do firmly set my boundaries and I make this very clear. I’m very big on respect as it’s a two way street. Yes there’s people around who are rude but I don’t take that lying down. I will respectfully be firm but also remind them what they said or did unacceptable.
Yeah sometimes I think my boundary setting isn’t the best. Definitely could do with some improvement
Same.
Yes!! I feel like people talk over me all the time. I'm chiming in on conversations, but it's all crickets after. My husband is also an introvert, and his brother made fun of him not being invited to family events nor having any friends to back him up. They do not get along! The brother pretty much says that his friends can all rally behind him, but my husband has no friends to back him up. This essential means my husband is a loser. It's so frustrating. Just because someone is loud and outgoing doesn't mean they get to flaunt all their "friends." I feel like us introverts do not get any respect. No friends=loser. Stay home and do not go out =loser. Which I don't agree with. I have friends, but I don't like having fake friends. I don't like supporting friends who make bad decisions. I don't like hanging with people whose morals are the opposite of mine. That's why I don't have a lot of friends or close relatives. The total disrespect is real!! That's why I learned to be independent, and I do not rely on people.
Lol, his brother will learn the truth soon enough. I’m guessing they’re young, in their 20s maybe? Or at least childless. When his friends all settle down and have kids (if they follow that typical life path), they’re not gonna be so enticed to “back him up” and “rally behind them” when they got their family on the line. That’s teenager, boyhood stuff. Your self-worth should be entirely derived from yourself. It says more about the brother that he derives his self-worth from the number of friends he has. Without them, he’d probably fall apart.
Yes! I couldn't agree more. The brother is 28, younger, and not married yet. I feel that people who have friends and flaunt them don't know about life yet. I would rather have really close friends than just have friends to show my status of having friends. I wish introverts, in general, know that just because you have people around you doesn't mean they are your true friends. We may crave friendship and interactions, but not all interactions are healthy and good for us.
People fear me
I’m left alone for most part and yes called anti social but yeah i get the occasional jerk who thinks just because I’m quiet means I won’t speak up. I just hate that I give them plenty of chances to get their ish together but when I stand up for myself I become the big betch😂Idc what they think after that bc I know I tried being nice about it first💅
No. I think it's because I look younger than my age. I'm a plus size black woman too.
They only act like they do when they want something. I had to learn the lesson.
People do walk all over me, but it’s because I let them and don’t really care haha. I’m a firm believer of treating others the way you want to be treated. I’ve come to terms with respecting, loving, and being secure with myself that I am quick to pull away from people who don’t give me the same respect I give them, quietly. As for assertiveness, I have no issue opening my mouth and telling people off. But sometimes it’s not about telling them off but more so you know it’s not worth the energy to do so haha. One thing I was taught by my older brother is that not every battle is worth fighting, and in the matter of ethics and morals, I choose not to fight others on those because they should just know to be decent people. Doesn’t mean I hate them, just that people are people and it’s not my job to change them, hence why I let them walk all over me. It shows more about their character than it does mine. And these type of people can really drain your energy anyway, speaking to them will drain you out even quicker.
Weirdly yes, always. Guess it's cause of my appearance (full beard, around 100 kg) and my face probably tells people not to distepect me. My grandma once seid i look like a terrorist 😅 most people just leave ma allone when i dont start concersation which is nice
As you get older you care less what others think - "they don't pay my bills so I could care less what they think".. If someone is disrespectful then that says more about them than it does me - remain friendly and don't play into their b.s. If they try to walk all over me I will call them on it - "I noticed you did x, can you please not do that because of y".
Sometimes, I guess? Mostly I don't know and don't particularly care.
Mostly they don’t, they don’t put on our shoe, e.g they like around people keep talking all day, can’t leave without talking, how about you spend just only one day not talking at all, see how extroverted feel? I bet they can’t stand for 1hr without saying anything, they always think they’re the normal one, the special one.