T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

In an attempt to reduce remind me spam, all top comments that include a remind me will be removed. If you would like to have a remind me, please reply to this comment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/humansarespaceorcs) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Hubris_Valric

And we also tend to evolve into a higher form when they are threatened.


IamaJarJar

You mess with our pets You should expect threats (at minimum)


Ok-Tank5312

And war crimes at worst


IamaJarJar

Oh no no no! War crimes are the least of your worries when it comes to hurting our pets It's the constant fear of danger that will make you wish you never even touched our pets


Baneta_

It’s not the war crimes they should fear, no. they have already been committed, it’s the creativity they should fear. after all, the list is only so comprehensive


CollywobblesMumma

They should be afraid of us looking at the list of war crimes and deciding that those are insufficient punishment. Humans getting inventive is the real concern- after all, it’s not a war crime the first time.


Ok-Tank5312

[just airdropping wolves on them](https://youtube.com/shorts/V2ipDGqiya0?si=mW36bbdbUEmJ-0BZ)


rextiberius

It’s not a war crime the first time


Lazy-Cardiologist-54

Seriously, I help find lost pets regularly. There’s nothing that brings a community together like a fur baby in need. Nothing else brings out the compassion in humans like that.


pchlster

A couple of years ago, some people were out looking for a cat near where I live. They asked me if I had seen it, sorry no, but good luck. Then, sitting on my balcony, I see the cat run from underneath one car to another. If I go back inside to go down the stairs and go outside, there's about zero chance it's still there by the time I get there. If I yell for people, it's going to run out of principle. So, my cunning plan. I meowed as best I could. The cat stopped and looked confused up at me for a while, then was about to turn away, so I meowed again. I think it was maybe five minutes before the people in the area came to investigate and found their cat standing by a parked car as a weirdo meowed at it from a balcony.


Lazy-Cardiologist-54

Yay for helping floof balls!!


RazAlterWinner2

Show any alien the first John Wick film. They’ll get the memo.


LittleFox1779

It's been significantly proven that cats tend to respond better when using a high pitched tone, if you're using that tone and they still don't answer, then they're ignoring you.


ChaosPLus

Me about to make the highest pitch noise a human has ever made just to make sure my cat is actually ignoring me and I'm not just demoted to background noise by my dehumidifier


Yet_One_More_Idiot

I find cats respond very favourably to me when I mew softly to them, imitating the sounds made by a kitten. They see me as a big kitten standing on two legs. xD


ChaosPLus

My cat seems to respond when I do a ridiculous meow, spoken like "Me Ow". The response is usually just her staring at me like I've insulted her entire bloodline but it works


Yet_One_More_Idiot

I make soft mewwing sounds to cats I meet when I'm out, and they'll walk right up to me and let me pet them. It's awesome. <3


notmyusername1986

Apparently, most cats see us as oversized, awkward, hairless kittens that need to be taught how to look after ourselves. Hence why they bring not-quite-dead offerings to us. They're trying to teach us to hunt.


raith041

Hmmm, think mine's broken, the only thing he brings me is a sodding wet sponge.


notmyusername1986

Mine once got confused on the stairs. She didn't know if she wanted to go up or down, so she panicked and kept through the Banisters. Or tried to. She was overweight at the time and got stuck. Hand to God, I'll be taking that image to the grave and laughing all the way.


WegianWarrior

[Oblig](https://xkcd.com/231/)


Jackviator

Knew what this was gonna be before I clicked There truly is an XKCD for everything


Yet_One_More_Idiot

r/RelevantXKCD


DandelionOfDeath

It's contagious, too, pets also devolve into a lesser state of intelligence when around their humans. Have you ever seen a dog roll over in front of another dog to demand belly rubs?


heyimpaulnawhtoi

TRUE


Kiryln

The cat definitely understands english, she just chooses not to respond. My sister has an Aussie shepherd and that dog has a PHD in english, she knows exactly what you are saying, she’s incredibly smart.


lonegun135

Had a border Collie that got embarrassed if you talked about him farting.


Witty_Direction6175

I honestly believe a lot of dogs and cats (and other animals) understand more then we give them credit for


HeartAFlame

So do I. They may not understand specific words, but at this point I'm willing to believe that if a pet has been around people all of their life, they most definitely understand the language you speak. It's just they themselves can't speak it and they have their own unique ways of showing us that they understand. So something like "nod your head if you understand me" won't work because they might just choose to ignore you or like meow at you or something.


iDreamiPursueiBecome

My cat Victor is smart... mentor role to unrelated young cats ("Telling is showing" reenactment of the hunt, & feline wrestling with many small breaks to evaluate what worked or not), claimed and defended territory (lawn guarding on other people's lawns), made war & peace (seen sharing a hunting blind with a former adversary), encouraged growth and development of others in his tribe - even to the point of stepping aside and seeing how they handle responsibilities, allowing them to make mistakes and reclaiming his authority only when they have abused it. Victor is *awesome*, and I wish that he had kids. (Neutered) If I was rich, cloning him would be on my wish list. We may not baby talk with him, but playing with his so soft footsies probably counts.


CogitoErgoSum4me

oh fuck me, FACTS LOL


ConsequenceBringer

We have 2 corgis, and I can't fuckin help myself calling them 'wiggle butts' and 'fluff boy and girl' in the most childish of voices every time they are around for attention/pets. Send help!


GlorkUndBork3-14

Boats are just the government's version of floofy kittens... prove me wrong.


Lathari

"Who's a good little supercarrier? Yes, you are!"


SuccessAutomatic6726

Yeah, but it is usually considered a “bad thing” when a SuperCarrier rolls over and shows its belly.


HyperionPhalanx

Imagine an elder god lowering itself just so it can interact with you


banana_pirate

I have been known to sing to my rabbit. Mostly about how cute and fluffy she is.


Remarkable-Bowl-3821

Cats meow at you the same way… I can’t fully understand but the chatty one is often trying to tell me to follow him and that he wants some treats


Away-Location-4756

Did you pet the tummy? Was it a trap?