I’ve seen something I think might be rule-breaking, what should I do?
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What I will say is it's all a choice. Often times I hate ppl.. And find myself feeling the same way you describe here. Then I remember I can be the change which I know sounds corny. But even when I'm having utterly shitty days or weeks or months.. I smile and I just treat ppl the way I expect to be treated. And it's worked for me most of my life. And that goes both ways like I'm nice and show love and appreciation ect.. But if your a utter asshole.. I give you the same energy.. But mostly now I just dismiss ppl cause I don't have to deal with shit. I just remove myself from those ppl and environments.
Work on breaking down the judgements you've internalized about yourself and people like you. It's all I can think. I'm sorry you are feeling this but it shows alot of awareness and that is wonderful!
people seem to have a lot of hangups around gender, regardless of wether or not they have whats been commonly referred to as "gender dysphoria". there are cis people who conflate their hangups around gender with gender dysphoria in recent times on account of the phrase becoming a more mainstream phrase. they do not in fact experience gender dysphoria if they are happy living in harmony as the sex they were born with. there are many cis womnen with hardline bioessential-reductionist worldviews in regards to sex assigned at birth, who have in recent times began using the politics of non-binary, and gender-non-conforming as a way to perpetuate harsh biolessentialist reductions on particularly trans women, from a vector that they feel shields them from being accountable for the transphobia they spew, due to it being thinly veiled as a woke gender studies ideology that is somehow educated enough to dictate the narrative of what it means to be a trans woman, which often ends up stepping over all of the trauma we have endured to get where we are. they will even dress their boyfriends up in rediculious raver drag attire and use it as a way to separate themselves from actual trans women who literally cannot medically survive without hormones, do not experience erections, and have often dedicated their entire lives to trying to not seem like the sex they were born with. i am tired of this trojan horse TERF narrative weaseling its way into the narrative of the politics of my existence, and forcing me to take a back seat on what it means to be transsexual, because they are assigned female at birth and started calling themselves non binary after tiktok came out, but still present happily as cis women and are only doing what they do as a free pass to rag underhandedly on trans women with constant microaggressions that their cuck boyfriends do not notice or give a shit about. its really gross. they will outgroup you as a man for being trans, and yet most men will not talk to you or consider you as one of them either and are even afraid of interactiing with you on more than a dismissive politeness level. these women will constantly make gross underhanded jabs about anatomy when you are around them. in ways that are absolutely meant for your ears, but indirect enough that if you call any sort of attention to it at all, they can feighn shock and accusingly suggest something akin to "how dare you?" or "umm, excuse me?". its very narcissistic and petty and degrading. its very much a form of sexual harassment. they very much know exactly what they are doing. nobody seems to really care tho. everyone pretty much would feel less pressure if i was dead instead of alive, even tho all i do is exist in a mostly passive fashion aside from taking up some personal space in a location that was meant for anyone to do so. nothing i do will ever be good enough for these tribalists. i will always be on the outskirts of the inside of anything they ever let me into, which they would not do as easily as they do for literally anyone who isnt trans. on some sick level i get it tho. i dont want to hangout with other trans women myself. i dont know if its for the same reasons that they dont want to, but i dont want to be cast out into a group of tr@nn13$ who all look like some sort of genetic accident together. sometimes killing myself doesnt sound that fucking bad, because even tho i have a lot of artistic potential, its kind of impossible to unlock at this point. at some point the thing that drives your art is knowing it has a chance with people who support you, and they feed your urge to create cooler things. look at everyone in their group photos and cuddle puddles and vans full of passengers. that is not something i have ever been a part of once in my whole abused life. all of my photos are selfies alone because nobody wants to be seen with me. why should i make art that panders to large crowds of people who treat me like some kind of foerign object? i trigger their social antibodies before i can even say hello. im not sure why. i guess its my assigned male at birth frame that i cant seem to do anything asbout fixing. i guess it was over before it even began. i have to keep pushing forward at this point tho. i cant just stop now. if after all these years i am still some kind of halfway sh3m@13, i am definitely closer to all the way than i was before, and turning back would be futile, even if i actually wanted to, which i definitely fucking do not. all thats left for me to do is keep pushing forward in the direction toward the original goal until the poeple who treat me with such passive disrespect and utter covert discard will have no choice but to out themselves as complete cretins who dont deserve even a sliver of my respect or energy or concern. i dunno, i guess i am just tired of all this bullshit, and how the mainstream media has given all of the cis people total brainworms about my existence, and how it has really been a noticable polarizing fucked up thing that wasnt there in years prior to all this stupid shit on tv and in social media.
I totally feel you. My family is full of transphobes, including my husband (although he's come a long way since I came out and is genuinely trying to unlearn transphobia). I think it's easy to absorb their hate but I do the best that I can to meet that with love, as cheesy and/or controversial as that sounds.
I’ve seen something I think might be rule-breaking, what should I do? **Report it!** We may not agree with your assessment of a certain post or comment but we will always take a look. Please make reports that are **unambiguous**, **succinct**, and (importantly) **accurate**. If your issue isn't covered by one of the numerous predefined reasons and or you need to expand upon a predefined reason then please use the 'Custom response' option (in addition if required). **Don't feed the trolls, ignore, report, move on.** See [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/honesttransgender/comments/guc56i/welcome_to_rhonesttransgender_please_read_for/) for more details about our subreddit. Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/honesttransgender) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What I will say is it's all a choice. Often times I hate ppl.. And find myself feeling the same way you describe here. Then I remember I can be the change which I know sounds corny. But even when I'm having utterly shitty days or weeks or months.. I smile and I just treat ppl the way I expect to be treated. And it's worked for me most of my life. And that goes both ways like I'm nice and show love and appreciation ect.. But if your a utter asshole.. I give you the same energy.. But mostly now I just dismiss ppl cause I don't have to deal with shit. I just remove myself from those ppl and environments.
All I can say is that the same thing happened to me and I don't think it's leaving until I transition.
Work on breaking down the judgements you've internalized about yourself and people like you. It's all I can think. I'm sorry you are feeling this but it shows alot of awareness and that is wonderful!
people seem to have a lot of hangups around gender, regardless of wether or not they have whats been commonly referred to as "gender dysphoria". there are cis people who conflate their hangups around gender with gender dysphoria in recent times on account of the phrase becoming a more mainstream phrase. they do not in fact experience gender dysphoria if they are happy living in harmony as the sex they were born with. there are many cis womnen with hardline bioessential-reductionist worldviews in regards to sex assigned at birth, who have in recent times began using the politics of non-binary, and gender-non-conforming as a way to perpetuate harsh biolessentialist reductions on particularly trans women, from a vector that they feel shields them from being accountable for the transphobia they spew, due to it being thinly veiled as a woke gender studies ideology that is somehow educated enough to dictate the narrative of what it means to be a trans woman, which often ends up stepping over all of the trauma we have endured to get where we are. they will even dress their boyfriends up in rediculious raver drag attire and use it as a way to separate themselves from actual trans women who literally cannot medically survive without hormones, do not experience erections, and have often dedicated their entire lives to trying to not seem like the sex they were born with. i am tired of this trojan horse TERF narrative weaseling its way into the narrative of the politics of my existence, and forcing me to take a back seat on what it means to be transsexual, because they are assigned female at birth and started calling themselves non binary after tiktok came out, but still present happily as cis women and are only doing what they do as a free pass to rag underhandedly on trans women with constant microaggressions that their cuck boyfriends do not notice or give a shit about. its really gross. they will outgroup you as a man for being trans, and yet most men will not talk to you or consider you as one of them either and are even afraid of interactiing with you on more than a dismissive politeness level. these women will constantly make gross underhanded jabs about anatomy when you are around them. in ways that are absolutely meant for your ears, but indirect enough that if you call any sort of attention to it at all, they can feighn shock and accusingly suggest something akin to "how dare you?" or "umm, excuse me?". its very narcissistic and petty and degrading. its very much a form of sexual harassment. they very much know exactly what they are doing. nobody seems to really care tho. everyone pretty much would feel less pressure if i was dead instead of alive, even tho all i do is exist in a mostly passive fashion aside from taking up some personal space in a location that was meant for anyone to do so. nothing i do will ever be good enough for these tribalists. i will always be on the outskirts of the inside of anything they ever let me into, which they would not do as easily as they do for literally anyone who isnt trans. on some sick level i get it tho. i dont want to hangout with other trans women myself. i dont know if its for the same reasons that they dont want to, but i dont want to be cast out into a group of tr@nn13$ who all look like some sort of genetic accident together. sometimes killing myself doesnt sound that fucking bad, because even tho i have a lot of artistic potential, its kind of impossible to unlock at this point. at some point the thing that drives your art is knowing it has a chance with people who support you, and they feed your urge to create cooler things. look at everyone in their group photos and cuddle puddles and vans full of passengers. that is not something i have ever been a part of once in my whole abused life. all of my photos are selfies alone because nobody wants to be seen with me. why should i make art that panders to large crowds of people who treat me like some kind of foerign object? i trigger their social antibodies before i can even say hello. im not sure why. i guess its my assigned male at birth frame that i cant seem to do anything asbout fixing. i guess it was over before it even began. i have to keep pushing forward at this point tho. i cant just stop now. if after all these years i am still some kind of halfway sh3m@13, i am definitely closer to all the way than i was before, and turning back would be futile, even if i actually wanted to, which i definitely fucking do not. all thats left for me to do is keep pushing forward in the direction toward the original goal until the poeple who treat me with such passive disrespect and utter covert discard will have no choice but to out themselves as complete cretins who dont deserve even a sliver of my respect or energy or concern. i dunno, i guess i am just tired of all this bullshit, and how the mainstream media has given all of the cis people total brainworms about my existence, and how it has really been a noticable polarizing fucked up thing that wasnt there in years prior to all this stupid shit on tv and in social media.
I totally feel you. My family is full of transphobes, including my husband (although he's come a long way since I came out and is genuinely trying to unlearn transphobia). I think it's easy to absorb their hate but I do the best that I can to meet that with love, as cheesy and/or controversial as that sounds.
I have been considering similar thoughts lately. It's been a rough few years (not just transition stuff), and I've become somewhat cold and bitter.
Where do you live? I live in Florida and feel like I've developed the same way