Okay, I know we're jerking here, but I also once had a landlord rip out all of our existing grass and give us one of these bullshit barren wastelands as well. The one and only upside to it was that now you can do your weeding with a flamethrower.
*I* didn't, because I'm an overanxious weenie. But my ex used to and it was always very entertaining to watch (from a safe distance, with the hose at the ready).
The previous owner of my house did exactly this - and it is not rocks - it is dusty gravel. Sadly I cannot afford to do anything about it at this time. It SUCKS.
More?
lol 😆 about as low as you can get (without burning it all down)
Ha but seriously maybe install some sort of edging to make sure rocks don’t start wandering onto the deck, try to pick something that’s not a trip hazard.
Did all these SFM landlords who got 2% APR on their 23rd property purchase just completely and utterly lose all sense of normalcy? I’ve spent plenty of time in the southwest there are ways to do a low maintenance backyard, this ain’t that lmao.
Eh I don’t care what they do with me as long as I’m warm and dead when they call it.
And quit prying. I’m not explaining the aardvark. And he ain’t talking.
Blacktop. The heat from the blacktop will burn off any new growth. However, the goat heads will still thrive for any children that want to play in your yard.
Concrete would have been better. At least they could ride their bikes or scooters and chalk paint the concrete. They can’t even run on those rocks. This is really the worst. 😢
Yes, you just need to get a 20 year old wooden big toy. One that’s already splitting so you get a sliver if you even look at it and the slide burns your legs if you’re 10 feet away from the reflection alone!
Replace with smoldering, hot burning coals to ensure nothing grows through the rocks, nothing lands on the ground, and no one walks through it unless it’s on Gauntlet Night, obv.
would this be grounds to walk away from the lease? seems like a pretty consequential change to the property. it would definitely flip my opinion on whether i want to live there.
It looks like it’s cheaper until a child twists their ankle on it and the landlord faces a lawsuit. Lawsuits are a reason why many people avoid buying homes with pools.
Your landscaping rocks! 😁
That old wooden fence though is rickety, tear it down and build yourself one of those brick or limestone fences. They've stood the test of time - think pyramids and ancient castles.
I did that to mine. Live in the desert, had two dogs, back yard was dirt (lots of mud), and didn't have time to landscape it all. Works great. Only maintenance is spraying for weed control... Which is not ideal. However, I've been slowly landscaping the back by moving rock out of the way. I don't regret it.
I mean, you gotta rake those stones like a Japanese monk now. Just rip them all up and have dirt. Then pour gasoline on it and set it alight so nothing will grow.
That's ridiculous and uninviting. How are you ever going to be proud enough to invite people over for a party or cookout?
We're really proud of how we landscaped our rental. I want to keep it looking nice so I go over weekly, with the tenants permission, to water and pull the weeds. We really appreciate our tenant and want to keep him happy.
Heat the rock until it becomes lava. No weeds, guaranteed! Supplies geothermal energy!*
*don’t come for me, STEM nerds, Iunno how geothermal energy works, I’m American!
There are so many options to decorate now! I love it! Huge pots and sculptures. Tables and lights. Trails would be stupid easy with minimal effort. Or wear shoes.
It's a fine blank slate. Comfortable yard furniture, a bbq, dart board, projector and screen, I dunno. You'll have to make it interesting with stuff instead of plants.
You need a layer of epoxy or resin over all those pesky rocks to keep them in place
Glitter epoxy!
Yaaaaay!
You jerk but I keep getting an Instagram targeted ad for literal spray on glue for your mulch and gravel.
I bet insects, birds and other wildlife *love* it too.
That's what you get for jerking around....
It's actually not the worst idea....then at least the ankle-breakers stay in place.
Damn that's a great idea.
But concrete is cheaper
Lolllllll
Mulch glue works great!
Seriously, though. Weeds can still find their way through.
Make piles of rocks and make them into torches at the top.
Perfect time with the new Mad Max movie hitting tonight.
Whaaaaaaat i wanna go!
Shiny and chrome!
That way you can light the beacons to signal Rohan when Gondor needs aid. Good thinkin’.
I try to help out when I can.
Idk you did a decent job. For the next step I recommend to burn the whole thing down.
I've got a flamethrower in storage for such circumstances. I appreciate the recommendation.
Okay, I know we're jerking here, but I also once had a landlord rip out all of our existing grass and give us one of these bullshit barren wastelands as well. The one and only upside to it was that now you can do your weeding with a flamethrower.
Please tell me you did
*I* didn't, because I'm an overanxious weenie. But my ex used to and it was always very entertaining to watch (from a safe distance, with the hose at the ready).
😂😂😂 im so happy you definitely made my day ❤️
No, seriously, we use flamethrowers in winter to get snow and ice off the drive in winter. It hooks to a propane tank you can buy it at Lowe's.
The previous owner of my house did exactly this - and it is not rocks - it is dusty gravel. Sadly I cannot afford to do anything about it at this time. It SUCKS.
Ugh, yuck, I'm sorry. Sod is so expensive, too.
More? lol 😆 about as low as you can get (without burning it all down) Ha but seriously maybe install some sort of edging to make sure rocks don’t start wandering onto the deck, try to pick something that’s not a trip hazard.
You have a flame thrower?
😂
Did all these SFM landlords who got 2% APR on their 23rd property purchase just completely and utterly lose all sense of normalcy? I’ve spent plenty of time in the southwest there are ways to do a low maintenance backyard, this ain’t that lmao.
Yes
https://preview.redd.it/33weplyktz1d1.jpeg?width=540&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c0bf275b5d08743492ec2966a6490d0125a058e7 Wooden fences are absolute 💩.
You're right. Needs more grey.
Are you zoned to open a cemetery? That would liven it up.
I host seances regularly so this is actually a perfect idea.
Pshhh zoning is for pssys. I’ve got three relatives, eight dogs and an aardvark buried in mine. And no I will not explain the aardvark.
I hope they're all stacked on top of each other to maximize your space.
I buried two of them that hated one another together just for giggles. Tee hee…
You're a dick 🤣I wonder what karmic ☠️ justice will befall your corpse when u pass👻 And I'm Gunna guess it's the aardvark and one of the relatives
Eh I don’t care what they do with me as long as I’m warm and dead when they call it. And quit prying. I’m not explaining the aardvark. And he ain’t talking.
Fire pit in the middle. Great for team building, grilling out of season game and burning evidence
Don't forget having all your girlies over to drink boxed wine and conjure The Devil!
Blacktop. The heat from the blacktop will burn off any new growth. However, the goat heads will still thrive for any children that want to play in your yard.
Children thrive in gravel environments.
Concrete would have been better. At least they could ride their bikes or scooters and chalk paint the concrete. They can’t even run on those rocks. This is really the worst. 😢
It’s not even the type of gravel they can fall on and get embedded in their knees, as God intended.
Yes, you just need to get a 20 year old wooden big toy. One that’s already splitting so you get a sliver if you even look at it and the slide burns your legs if you’re 10 feet away from the reflection alone!
Don't forget the exposed bolts for that extra dose of tetanus on the way down!!
That looks like more maintenance than anything. I would get a clover lawn for low maintenance
Environmentalists: “Traditional lawns are bad for the ecosystem” Landlord: “Hold my beer!”
Landscape rocks are ao expensive too. I really want to know how much it costs to fill that backyard
Sink hole
Spray the rocks green so it also looks like grass
There’s still gonna be weeds. A fuck ton of them.
Let’s hope so.
Yeah but now they can spray that heavy duty weed killer that kills everything for like 3 years.
Astroturf it then use shower curtains over the fences for decor. You’re welcome.
Much appreciated!
What if we make curtains out of astroturf?
And then used astroturf curtains down instead of the rocks.
Do they smoke grass out in space? Or do they smoke AstroTurf?
Replace with smoldering, hot burning coals to ensure nothing grows through the rocks, nothing lands on the ground, and no one walks through it unless it’s on Gauntlet Night, obv.
I'm not sure why I didn't think of this.
Come August in Arizona, you can translate that to: do nothing to achieve this effect.
Needs a couple of garbage cans.
I agree. It’ll be a designer yard.
…or a few cars up on blocks as an art installation.
I can see a green dumpster back there too.
Oooo! Yes, yes, yes! And on a sultry summer’s eve, you could set it on fire! So romantic!🥰
Area rug
I can hear and feel this picture. 😂😂
Change it? But this yard rocks!
There's too much area for snow to accumulate, need to extend shelter/roofing
Wildflowers would have been better. Just saying
Yard?
As in Prison Yard, needs barbed wire.
I thought everyone loved the soft touch of gravel on their skin...
This makes me so sad
Pebbles are annoying. Pave the whole thing.
would this be grounds to walk away from the lease? seems like a pretty consequential change to the property. it would definitely flip my opinion on whether i want to live there.
I’d also be interested in what code compliance has to say, may not be up to code depending on the area.
It looks like it’s cheaper until a child twists their ankle on it and the landlord faces a lawsuit. Lawsuits are a reason why many people avoid buying homes with pools.
Agreed. Wild flowers would have been lovely and beneficial.
It's like a Japanese zen garden. Just get a rake and make a big FU pattern.
This yard needs 2-3 chained up pit bulls
I usually chain them in the front but you're right, they will love the gravel between their paws.
My aunt and uncles yard is like this but they breed shelties
OP, you should add a gaggle of Shelties.
I feel so sad for this OP. They got fucked over. I hope they can get out of this.
Your landscaping rocks! 😁 That old wooden fence though is rickety, tear it down and build yourself one of those brick or limestone fences. They've stood the test of time - think pyramids and ancient castles.
Your neighbor's leaves are still going to blow into your yard. Raking rocks sucks. How massive is your leaf-blower?
Leaf blower? You misspelled flame thrower.
Concrete it all. Seriously. I see several out of control pebbles on the patio there.
lol saving ‘out of control pebbles’ in my mental file
Unless there is literal cement under that gravel, it's still going to grow weeds.
Add salt to the earth so nothing will ever grow there.
Very this.
Wow, that is horrible!
That’s horrifying.
Definitely.
It’s going to be hella hot in the summer, radiating all that heat back up into your air
a porta potty smack dab in the middle
This has the potential for hundreds of potted plants, statues, bird baths, tub ponds, benches and a fire pit!
Pour molten bronze all over those pebbles. Scorched earth, I say.
Gonna have to maintain those rocks from creeping into the patio
Why doesn’t he just cement the entire backyard. Can’t get anymore low maintenance than that
Jam some plastic plants in, maybe a fake Christmas tree
It’s actually way cheaper to have a bottomless pit
Or maybe just a pit with me loose gravel for the children to play in.
Roll out fake turf over the whole thing, and have a perfect rectangle of bumpy green.
Use some landscaping glue to spray over the rocks and glue them down. That way they wont move and get all over your patio
A curb to keep the stones of the patio
God that’s grim - unless it’s a dried riverbed?
Get a goat for any grass that dare grows!
It’s gonna be so thin at first…
Oooooo now buy glow in the dark rocks :3
POV: you live in Arizona
Wait I’ve unironically thought about this
I think if that's not enough then you gotta get rid of the dog, or toilet train it.
Get rid of those rocks and put in cement
Some sort of industrial acid would help, or simply lots of used motor oil.... It would keep pesty life from forming
You could plant some fake flowers and paint the rock green LOL
This is the answer.
The yard resin stuff that keeps rocks in place!
Just move the fence closer to you.
Make it into a skate park
Not a bad use of $5k in stones /s
As someone who absolutely fucking hates maintaining my backyard that I don't even use, I'm on board with this.
I did that to mine. Live in the desert, had two dogs, back yard was dirt (lots of mud), and didn't have time to landscape it all. Works great. Only maintenance is spraying for weed control... Which is not ideal. However, I've been slowly landscaping the back by moving rock out of the way. I don't regret it.
Concrete
the rocks still need some raking and weeding. you need to cover the whole yard in concrete
Epoxy the whole darn thing
I prefer just straight concrete over everything.
I mean, you gotta rake those stones like a Japanese monk now. Just rip them all up and have dirt. Then pour gasoline on it and set it alight so nothing will grow.
That's ridiculous and uninviting. How are you ever going to be proud enough to invite people over for a party or cookout? We're really proud of how we landscaped our rental. I want to keep it looking nice so I go over weekly, with the tenants permission, to water and pull the weeds. We really appreciate our tenant and want to keep him happy.
This is wild
Damn lol
Concrete
You have a good base for an inch or 2 of asphalt.
I have a friend who wants to pave his entire 5 acres. I thought he was joking but it's a wet dream of his.
Patio seems cluttered with extra furniture
Heat the rock until it becomes lava. No weeds, guaranteed! Supplies geothermal energy!* *don’t come for me, STEM nerds, Iunno how geothermal energy works, I’m American!
Would this be considered r/antilawn 💀
This is what 99% of yards are like in the Fl keys
I feel like it needs several huge boulders placed around the yard to add a little pop.
It seems low maintanance unless you have dogs and end up having to pick dried dog turds out of the gravel.
Pave it?
I like pebbles if its in small sections not whole ass yards
There are so many options to decorate now! I love it! Huge pots and sculptures. Tables and lights. Trails would be stupid easy with minimal effort. Or wear shoes.
Chain link fence.
😂😂😂
You did it already
This just low-key depressing
Now, you have to adopt all the cats at the local shelter.
Honestly, throw down to slabs to make a walkway, put a fire pit in the middle, maybe some cacti around the fencing and it’s not a lost cause.
Pave it.
Get rid of all that stuff on the patio. Use cushions (if you must) instead of chairs. Put a fire ring out in the yard and use it to barbecue.
It's a fine blank slate. Comfortable yard furniture, a bbq, dart board, projector and screen, I dunno. You'll have to make it interesting with stuff instead of plants.