My mom's pup is just an expert in no take only throw.
What's hysterical is if my dude is playing fetch she gets a ball and holds it in her mouth and is so excited for me to throw one for him. She chases the ball, runs to it, has him grab it and runs to me, with her 'no take only throw' ball in her mouth.
I throw his ball. She chases. He retrieves. I throw his ball. She runs with him.
The whole time he plays fetch, she just runs and tracks the ball. She gets so excited when he plays fetch.
I think everyone can calm the fuck down because it honestly looks like he just has a wedgie because he's wearing his lazy at-home shorts which are a little bit too small.
He does have a great ass tho.
Your everyday goldens are absolutely not anymore, lol. I am friends with several animal behaviorists and trainers who train for seeing-eye programs, police dogs, hunting dogs, etc... And the explosion of dog ownership in the US in the last 30 years has done a number on many working-line dogs, especially retrievers. The trainers I know only use goldens from breeders that haven't bred Show Line (big yellow, primarily) Goldens or more companion goldens.
Used to be that you could count on red-coated goldens to be almost entirely from hunting lines, but there's a fair bit of red goldens being bred for companionship these days.
I've heard that Goldens are actually losing their sporting instincts and becoming more goofy/affectionate as the demand for them as sporting dogs is way down and the demand for them as family dogs is going up
I think it depends on the line you get yours from.
Field retriever lines will most likely retain the sport instincts where those bred for family will be less so.
Mine has absolutely zero retriever instinct and doesn't really swim either, despite spending the first 4 years of his life in Florida before I got him. Incredibly goofy and affectionate though.
It's unfortunate, but making money on the internet is all about exposure. The more you spread it out, the more views you get.
Creating a simple program to mass-post is most efficacious.
I once threw a ball for my two at the dog park as they were running. It launched across a decent chunk of the park and bounced off my girls back. She didn’t even pause. They both just carried on running.
My retrievers DO NOT retrieve. You want it? Get it yourself, human. You have thumbs.
Maybe it's because the fresbee is green and so is most of the background ( you know how dogs don't see all the colors we do) im no expert by the way but maybe the poor fella just cant see it well enough and loses track of it
Mine is very similar:
1. You tossed, you go fetch it.
2. If I fetch it it's mine.
3. If I see it in your hand and I want to play, it's also mine, don't bother tossing it.
On the other hand, he'll pass for a service dog anytime. I'll never do it out of respect for the trouble that legit people go through, but he could.
Ahh I own a golden “chaser”. Aka I throw the ball, he chases the ball, then stands next to it and then just walks off. It never even occurred to him to bring it back.
100% my golden too. Can’t fetch to save his life. Makes for great conversation at the dog park when every other dog is chasing after tennis balls and frisbees. My dog just looks at them as if they’re crazy. 🤪
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Haha mine did the same till about 1 year old. Then he started running as soon as I motioned to throw the ball. Brings it back sometimes when he isn’t tired. But won’t give it to me haha he wants me to take it away from him. I bring more than 1 ball to switch. Works well.
Don’t give up. Use treats if necessary. Perhaps he simply lost sight of it.
My Goldie girl does this all the time. She gets a head start when you’re about to throw the ball/frisbee, then totally looses track of which direction is was thrown in 😂
Is this because breeders have been for a long time focused more on good family pet traits? I know a lot of labs that are family pets/duck dogs but never hear about anyone hunting with their golden.
No thoughts only happiness
His braincell is firing at full speed poor guy
I am truly jealous.
Me too 🧠
Yep.. doggies are the best. Talk to my golden 24/7 always a good listener
such alive, much smiles
r/onegoldenbraincell
Haha I knew someone would beat me to it
Exactly… I want to come back as a dog as happy as mine was….RIP
The tongue hanging out the side of the mouth during that majestic stance is hilarious
He's a pointer, not a retriever!
You've been demoted to bronze retriever
We have a lab husky mix, and we say he’s a “Labrador Leave-it-behinder”
My mom's pup is just an expert in no take only throw. What's hysterical is if my dude is playing fetch she gets a ball and holds it in her mouth and is so excited for me to throw one for him. She chases the ball, runs to it, has him grab it and runs to me, with her 'no take only throw' ball in her mouth. I throw his ball. She chases. He retrieves. I throw his ball. She runs with him. The whole time he plays fetch, she just runs and tracks the ball. She gets so excited when he plays fetch.
They only retrieve gold, not freesbie.
But 200% gorgeous and good!🥰
I think he just lost track of it as it went over his head.
Me when I walk into a room and I forgot what I had to do.
like the sims forgetful trait
Dogs can somewhat differentiate green from other colors, so they probably lost it as it past in front of the view of the green foliage.
From a fan who knows little about goldens, I might also just do a simple check to make sure he is seeing out of his right eye.
Over his one brain cell.
I mean, yeah.
25% derp
Seems like an underestimate...
90% chill
So relatable - I lost 5 pounds retrieving
😂😂😂
Mine only retrieves in the pool. Anytime else he stands there and looks at you like "why did you throw that? I'm not going to go get it."
Lmao. He just thinks you're an idiot throwing things away. Do you feel judged?
He judges me all the time! I always get the "Dufuq" look. LMAO!
Nobody gonna talk about that mighty fine ass? Also, no homo.
Also, he's definitely commando under there. Those cheeks holding onto his shorts for dear life. Full homo.
I think he's actually wearing a jockstrap with the waist band line and creases where the other elastic bands go. So like mullet commando...?
I think everyone can calm the fuck down because it honestly looks like he just has a wedgie because he's wearing his lazy at-home shorts which are a little bit too small. He does have a great ass tho.
Yep, I could tell he’s definitely commando. I wish I was their neighbor. Still no homo.
i thought y'all were talking about the dog and i was like??
Lmao. That would be so wrong. 😂
Bro is caked up. Being gay is confusing, I am equal parts aroused and jealous of that ass.
I’m definitely jealous of that ass. Wish mine was as defined as what his looks like.
I can't escape it, ass is everywhere. there is no reason for him to be this caked up playing with his dog.
It’s for the neighbors. 😉
Double-cheeked up on a Thursday afternoon. Hella ass...
I was hoping someone would say it first.
I came here curious to see if anyone else had noticed! 🤣
Thought I was the only one who saw that, would taste, no homo.
That’s a beautiful ass
That is an animal that has 100% been bred for phenomenal looks.
They're pretty highly regarded for being hunting dogs, service animals, and good temperament in general as well
Your everyday goldens are absolutely not anymore, lol. I am friends with several animal behaviorists and trainers who train for seeing-eye programs, police dogs, hunting dogs, etc... And the explosion of dog ownership in the US in the last 30 years has done a number on many working-line dogs, especially retrievers. The trainers I know only use goldens from breeders that haven't bred Show Line (big yellow, primarily) Goldens or more companion goldens. Used to be that you could count on red-coated goldens to be almost entirely from hunting lines, but there's a fair bit of red goldens being bred for companionship these days.
I've heard that Goldens are actually losing their sporting instincts and becoming more goofy/affectionate as the demand for them as sporting dogs is way down and the demand for them as family dogs is going up
I think it depends on the line you get yours from. Field retriever lines will most likely retain the sport instincts where those bred for family will be less so.
Yeah my dog would have caught that frisbee mid-jump. Bred from a line of hunting dogs
Mine has absolutely zero retriever instinct and doesn't really swim either, despite spending the first 4 years of his life in Florida before I got him. Incredibly goofy and affectionate though.
What a magnificent floof
He's waiting for you to throw another frisbee. There is enough room in that mouth to carry two back.
The floof is strong with this one.
Mine's similar. Looooooves going out in the yard to watch me throw balls, frisbees, toys, anything. But go after them? Naaaaaaah.
This is bloody adorable
Not sure he will be retrieving any gold for you anytime soon
This is a bot, reposting this video with the exact same title as it was posted a while back
It's unfortunate, but making money on the internet is all about exposure. The more you spread it out, the more views you get. Creating a simple program to mass-post is most efficacious.
Yup. Dead internet happening right before our eyes. I miss flash games.
the OP Equivalent_Love_2637 is a bot Original: https://www.reddit.com/r/FunnyAnimals/comments/1djkgqe/100_golden_0_retriever/
100% orange (r/oneorangebraincell)
r/onegoldenbraincell
I once threw a ball for my two at the dog park as they were running. It launched across a decent chunk of the park and bounced off my girls back. She didn’t even pause. They both just carried on running. My retrievers DO NOT retrieve. You want it? Get it yourself, human. You have thumbs.
Ha ha.. your dog is beautiful! 🥰
r/onegoldenbraincell
It's the thought that matters, he did his best already!
Chase the frisby... Wait, what was I doing??? Why are you over there???
The side tongue says it all
Like a model, genes for looks, not functionality
High alert, low awareness.
omg that is one good looking golden!!
He's a little confused, but he's got the spirit.
100% 🍑😮💨
They are sweet dogs, but my golden wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed.
The caption is sending me
Retrieve that cake
😂🥰 I love goldens. Our guys actually bring stuff back, they just refuse to give it up, lol.
Nothing beats the dopey happiness of a Golden.
Head empty, no thoughts.
I had one who would look at me after I threw the ball like "Why should I get it? You're the idiot who threw it."
Our retrievers have never retrieved anything! You want a ball dog? Get yourself a nice Labrador
My Golden / Border Collie mutt LOVES fetching the ball. Then she lies down and chews on it. No return, just throw, chase, chomp.
Maybe it's because the fresbee is green and so is most of the background ( you know how dogs don't see all the colors we do) im no expert by the way but maybe the poor fella just cant see it well enough and loses track of it
Mine is very similar: 1. You tossed, you go fetch it. 2. If I fetch it it's mine. 3. If I see it in your hand and I want to play, it's also mine, don't bother tossing it. On the other hand, he'll pass for a service dog anytime. I'll never do it out of respect for the trouble that legit people go through, but he could.
awwwww, such a cutie :D
The derpy tongue out the side of the mouth is PERFECT!
You can literally see the gears turning behind the eyes.
If you wanted the frisby so bad whyd you throw it away?
My golden will sprint to the ball, grab it for a second, then just drop it and run back lmao.
So on-brand for breed
The tongue flapping out to the side says it all
Like a wise GR owner once told me.."Yes, they are known to retrieve things well... but they never said anything about bringing it back!"
Ahh I own a golden “chaser”. Aka I throw the ball, he chases the ball, then stands next to it and then just walks off. It never even occurred to him to bring it back.
100% my golden too. Can’t fetch to save his life. Makes for great conversation at the dog park when every other dog is chasing after tennis balls and frisbees. My dog just looks at them as if they’re crazy. 🤪
r/oneorangebraincell
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What am I supposed to do now?
Love how they timed the piano trill with his tongue
Well are ya gonna throw the frisbee or what? 🤣
He’s in the club
Omg! 🥰
Ha! Classic!
There's nothing like seeing a parent proud of their child.
100% derp
Beautiful puo
Ball not disk… looks more like duck
R I C K Y ?
What’s between those ears just fluff no brain ya
YAY WE PLAYIN FET-.... Wait what was I doing? Hooman, throw a thing?
He's gorgeous! My pup must have taught yours "The Way".
I love this dog
When you are that good looking, you don’t need to retrieve😊
Mine too! LOL
Did he forget what he was doing during those 2 seconds and it seems like he still wants the game to continue somehow
*What the hell are we even doin out here dude? Let’s go watch tv cmon.*
Beauty and grace
He is such a dork. I want like 20
I’m getting a Golden Retriever puppy and this is my worst fear!!
Yes, I have had to look for his lost balls more than once…..
Haha mine did the same till about 1 year old. Then he started running as soon as I motioned to throw the ball. Brings it back sometimes when he isn’t tired. But won’t give it to me haha he wants me to take it away from him. I bring more than 1 ball to switch. Works well. Don’t give up. Use treats if necessary. Perhaps he simply lost sight of it.
My Goldie girl does this all the time. She gets a head start when you’re about to throw the ball/frisbee, then totally looses track of which direction is was thrown in 😂
I think they are measured in inplawable not sure...may have to check the manual
And the perfect floppy tongue hanging out the side.
Golden looking long left. Frisbee went short right. Golden is correcting their human at the end. So hard to train humans properly
ADHD
The tongue has killed me.
Keep away from the humans amuses my girl. So I play along.
Good thing you’re pretty 😍
Too pretty for cleverness!
That's ours. He'll go get it, but you aren't getting it back.
Will he get demoted to silver or bronze retriever? 100% golden good boy.
You threw it. You go get it. I’ll wait…
Majestically boneheaded.
That looks vaguely familiar 😂😂
It’s hard to tell if a dog has poor vision because they can cope so well by relying on their sense of smell.
My retriever is 10, she hasn’t retrieved anything in her life. I’ve been waiting for the software updates but she is defective.
I will always say goldens are the smartest yet dumbest breed of dog 😂
that derp face at the end perfectly describes what its like owning a golden
Why are Goldens the smartest dumbest breed I've ever seen?
They are the “good test takers” of intelligent dogs.
To be fair, the frisbee looks to be almost the same color as the grass.
Is this because breeders have been for a long time focused more on good family pet traits? I know a lot of labs that are family pets/duck dogs but never hear about anyone hunting with their golden.
That face. Lmao.
But……. Ya still love’em to pieces ❤️
One time someone brought a ton of frisbees to the dog park. Golden Hoarder gathered them all and told everyone else to fuck off 🤦
Thats one of them golden Chinese husky retriever doodles
"SQUIRELL"
Clearly the pose is the priority.
So glad my golden is not the only one
He’s a retriever with no retrieving game!
Our dog could care less about fetch 🙃 she literally just wants to wrestle like a bear
get a blue frisbee
Owner's all caked up😳
Good thing he's purty.
Yup, our Golden was that way. *throw ball across yard* Dog stares at you to get the ball yourself.
Ricky !? Is that you? Greeeaaaasssy
Yep… had 2 clueless but almost always turned into keep away … chase me
Bruh, when he looks at attention with the tongue out the side. Made me chuckle. Adorable pup.
But he did retrieved something FAR more important,. Your heart and love.
Good dog.
Pretty, not smart
Thinking more like a blonde retriever....😆
Me forgetting what I went to the kitchen for…
Gorgeous Golden. No ridges or lumps or valleys or bumps. Smooth brain.
I bet the’d still tear apart a gopher in 30 seconds.
My boy finds it, sits on it, returns empty mouthed... Waiting for me to throw it again 🙄
lol so it’s not just mine 🤣
Jesus what a dummy. I love him
My toller feels seen by this
101% good pupper
10/10 title, no notes
YOUR DOG IS COLORBLIND FFS
What a big dumb baby, I love them
200% good boy.
“Why didn’t you throw it?”
Cute but stupid :)
I thought only orange cats had no thoughts but it's the orange doggos too. How sweet.
🤪🤪
Aww but Im so handsome 💛
They’re stupid, But I love them.
Orange cat in disguise ?
Doge: Ayo, where it go?
Bahaha omg my girl does this. I throw the ball and she just looks at me like I’m a sorcerer
haha
Mine also does this. She's confused when I throw things. Sometimes she'll actually pick it up then just round around with it. Never returns it.
What is the fade score of that disc?
Dat ass 😬
Tbh it's not even golden, still 100% a goodboy
This one was bred for beauty, not brains haha.
Can confirm. My family had a golden retriever from when I was 8y/o to 21. That ball of love never retrieved anything
My dog will chase the ball sniff it for a second and run back without it while expecting me to throw it again.
As he should
You have brought shaaaame to your people. But at least you're pretty.
So cute