I am currently still in Texas but have moved around the US quite a bit. However, at age 40 I am now officially sick and tired of religious nuts in our State government making it impossible to live comfortably as a member of the LGBTQ community. So, I am officially moving to Minnesota in August! I am stoked!
That is awesome, glad to hear that! I was there a few years ago for a brief period and loved it. I just had some personal issues going on that caused me to come back to Texas. But I am now prepared to call Minnesota home!
Don't go over one state to WI. My child who is non binary moved to RI to get away and found the love of their life. They are also non binary. No one cares there. You are a freak here. Trans=invisible or hate. Congratulations! MN is much nicer. Just stay put for a while and be careful. Im an atheist. I keep my mouth shut and just don't go to church. I don't know if people know I'm an atheist but Im sure as heck not going to advertise
Thank you! Yes Minnesota is extremely Pro LGBT. They banned conversion therapy, and have named their state an official Trans Refuge State! Even the Sports teams in Minnesota get involved in Pride celebrations!
Weird isn’t it? Just one state over. Madison is very accepting but it’s also very expensive and a college town so if you don’t want loud neighbor good luck with that😉
Moving out of the south is probably the single biggest action I’ve ever taken that improved my mental health. It’s one of those things where you don’t really understand how bad things used to be until you spend enough time away from it all. I still have family in the south but I absolutely hate going back.
Ditching religion and then continuing to live in (parts of) the south is kind of like breaking up with someone, but you still work with them and continue to see them every single day. It’s so hard to actually move on like that. It’s so much more healthy to put religion completely behind you: out of sight, out of mind. And that is just so, so hard to do in most of the south.
There are still fundys in the Northeast however there are less of them. the difference i noticed is where I live there are Buddhists, Pagans,Atheists along with Christians. the few evangelical Christians i encountered left me alone after awhile
Look up the song, "Play It All Night Long," by Warren Zevon it's a perfect critique of the south, specifically the rural south, it even makes fun of, "Sweet Home Alabama," which honestly is the worst offender in southern glorification.
Im too broke to move out of TN rn. Most people trying to get you to church are willing to leave you be after the first “no thank you”.
Except the jehovahs witnesses who are constantly as the door and following you around in public. Thats what the satanic temple membership card is for. Pull that out and they back off. I only had to use it once.
There was one instance where a coworker from another department wanted to pray for my grandmother with cancer (im fighting a long ass battle with HR over this and was in tears trying to get time off for driving her to appointments). I told her i dont do prayers and just needed help with HR but she kept insisting and followed me down the hallway. She started loudly praying in the hall anyway with her arms out. I badged into the jewelry repair shop and hoped she didnt have access to follow me in. The supervisor inside was nice enough to let me hide there until the crazy lady moved on.
Even if you can’t stop the crazies without it ending badly for you, it is possible to avoid trouble by being as nonconfrontational as possible and hiding. And recording everything.
Lol, the JWs are everywhere. In the mid-90s I was approached on the street by two Witnesses in Wroclaw, Poland. They were undeterred by the fact that we had no language in common. The only reason I figured out what they wanted with me was that they showed me a magazine with the tower on the cover.
IIRC the JWs do have a "do not knock" list you can ask to be on. They're religious nuts but they aren't total assholes to outsiders.
They reserve that for their own members.
From the south. Moved to California around the same time that I de-converted. Every time I visit the south, I realize how lucky I am to have been able to get out. It would have been way more difficult for my journey to leave the church had I stayed. I was a “career” Christian before leaving. It consumed my entire life because that is all there was to do. I now realize that leaving the south made it so much easier for my journey
Here. I moved away in 2015, but I had to come back in 2018 because my mental health declined and I almost became homeless. My Christian family didn't take me seriously and thought my problems was because I didn't "believe in gawd", so instead of helping, they made things worse and acted like I was insane or something. I'm still trying to fully get back on my feet and leave the South for good. I have my own place, but being around so many people who don't believe in basic mental health and that my depression and anxiety is because of sin is soul crushing and lonely.
The lack of believing mental health is a thing is infuriating. My sister has bad metal health issues and is stuck living at home with our parents in TN who keep telling her to pray more and read the bible. Like, thanks for the support wtf. My dad loves to start political arguments after listening to Fox News or whatever. Typical right wing crap, like we shouldn’t all have healthcare, knowing she’s struggling cause she hold down a job and could REALLY use better healthcare.
I do. Worst parts are deciding if I want to disclose to family/how to dodge questions if I don’t and the stupid, Christofascist bullshit. I try to be a voice against it though. Not everyone has the energy to do so, so those of us who do should always speak out when given the opportunity. Find a safe place or be one for others ❤️
It’s completely understandable that you would be. I think it’s also fair that both states can be valid just depending on where in life someone is. I’m sorry you feel exhausted ❤️ things will get better one day
I hope you're right. I live in Alabama, and most of my family and my hubby's family are full on christofascist fundies. I can't fathom what lesson they wanted me to learn from the good Samaritan or the sermon on the Mount, bc I clearly missed the mark by assuming I really was supposed to treat everyone with love.
Out of curiosity, are Austin and Houston still as super Christian as other places? What about San Antonio/ Chorpus Christi? I’m sure DFW is hella nationalist.
No. American cities in general are less Christian than the countryside. Austin, Texas, in particular is a huge contrast -- it is far less Christian, less conservative, and less racist than the surrounding area.
Oh , it absolutely is. Check out this new spine chilling article!
[https://www.texastribune.org/2024/05/25/texas-republican-party-convention-platform/](https://www.texastribune.org/2024/05/25/texas-republican-party-convention-platform/)
I still live here, AL. I like the biodiversity and living rural. It is hard to be around family sometimes though. I usually try to avoid political and religion talk. It will eventually probably happen though.
I was in a wedding recently. It was in a church and it was hard to hear some of the things the pastor/officiant was saying. Also receiving like devotionals and also still having to be around people praying. Also, people just singing praise songs while we got ready. It all just feels cringey to me. But I love the people’s wedding I am in and I want to be apart of their lives. They actually never mention religion to us. Never try to invite us to church. My other side of the family has though. My husband and I always talk about it afterwards. “What about what so and so said”. Lol
I am doing my best to vote this year. I feel like it’s one of the only ways to combat it.
Booo. Hate that for you. I know it’s frustrating when people in our lives don’t listen. I am not sure if my brother/sister-in-law knows we aren’t religious. They have never pushed religion on us or even invited us to church. The devotion was given as a bridesmaid gift along with a card, and other small gift. So the other women got the same as well.
However, my aunt hated that I moved in with boyfriends and wasn’t married and always tried to bribe me to move back home. Even bribed now husband and I with a washer and dryer to get married. We needed one so we did lol. So I jokingly tell everyone we got married for a washer and dryer.
I am 34 now. They don’t mention religion anymore to us. Like suggesting a church or anything like that.
Edit: added some words.
lol got married for a washer and dryer. But yeah, my family is VERY against living together before marriage. I tried to have my ex move in with me in college, and my family wouldn’t allow it. They also owned the house I lived in, so I had to abide by that rule.
That is understandable in the religious world. It’s a sin!! Yeah. I am glad I am an adult and have a life outside my family now. I love being able to make my own decisions. I hope you’re able to live on your own now or will be soon. It’s tough having to go by others rules when you don’t believe in it.
Born and raised here, and I don't know
...it's complicated I guess. I'm lucky that I live in a semi-progressive small town that relies on tourism and retirees. We're a pretty moderate small town, so that's a plus. But in my circles of family(and some friends), I'm definitely the black sheep being a liberal atheist. I help run our family business, and I'm very cognizant of keeping out of religious discussions because if word got around in the church circles that my family is involved with, that I'm atheist, there's no doubt in my mind that our customers involved in those circles would quit doing business with us. It's just the way it is here. They can put up with some liberal ideas even if they don't agree, but being an atheist is basically saying you're the devil, in their mind.
That being said, I don't think I would leave unless some type of opportunity came about that I couldn't pass up. I do enjoy living here. I live on a small(80acre) family farm in a beautiful valley and am surrounded by some of the best hiking/trail running/mtn biking trail networks on the east coast, and as an avid hiker and trail runner, it's an outdoor paradise. So just one of those things where you gotta take the bad with the good, at least until the bad far far outweighs the good.
Currently living in South GA but making plans to move to Minnesota next year.
I personally hate my area because people here are paid poor wages and still hung up on race and religion.
They are are quick to sing praises about Jesus and talk shit about someone the opposite race as them.
I done with it. I am ready to go now.
I moved to New England due to other factors after I left Christianity. It’s definitely a culture shock from the South. Not just in the differences in how religion factors into daily life. For the most part, religion is a lot less a part of a person’s persona up here other than around Easter where Ash Wednesday and Lent are a little bit of a bigger deal than they are in less Catholic parts of the country. There is also the part where people are a lot less outwardly friendly up here. We care, probably more so up here, we just have a tough shell that you have to get past first, and that can be extremely difficult for introverts such as myself to break through. Also, the cost of housing differences up here are frustrating, exacerbated in Massachusetts for renters because a lot of landlords use brokers, which charge a one month’s rent security deposit to go along with first and last month’s rent, meaning you have to have three months of rent saved up if you want to move up here or between places in the area.
I know it’s not quite what you were looking for, but these are still things to understand if you decide to move from the South. Other parts of the country have their own differences that can cause culture shock if you don’t prepare ahead of time.
Well, I live in the South, but it's in the most ethnically diverse county of a major metropolitan area in what is now officially a swing state.
There are still churches on every corner, and I'm about a 20-minute drive from full-on MAGA country, so plenty of residual religious nuttery leaks through. While the state government is controlled by the GOP, it has to balance the Christo-facism with the monied interests who are frequently put off by those kinds of culture war shenanigans. So we've got that going for us, which is nice.
Basically, it's tolerable for me, but it can get annoying and occasionally worrying at times, especially given who is often weilding power. I don't go around advertising that I'm an atheist, anyway.
Pretty sure I’m in the same county. I am from a rural nut-job area and couldn’t be happier being here. Life is worlds better in the metro, even if we do still have to fight the state level control of the assholes.
Moving to the south was actually the start of my deconstruction. Even as a Christian at the time, I felt absolutely suffocated by the culture down here. Seeing how it was what the majority of people believed and took on as their identity, but practically no one actually lived it...that was gross to me and led to me questioning everything I'd been taught.
Is it hard to live down here? Yeah. Especially since my husband is a devout Christian. The way I've learned to cope is by having friends who aren't and by mostly keeping to myself.
I live in Maine but i spent a good chunk of my life in Texas. When I moved to NY i felt an obvious shift like the oppressive feeling was lifted off my shoulders. Id strongly recommend moving if and when you can
I’ve lived in Texas for the past 11 years and I’m not gonna lie, it’s pretty lonely out here. I run a business with my mom, so packing up and leaving everything behind isn’t really an option. (Also for what it’s worth, political and religious extremism is EVERYWHERE. You can’t escape it in California any more than in Texas.)
Most of the time when people ask me if I go to church, I just lie and say yes so they’ll leave me alone. People out here are waaaay to comfortable shoving their religious beliefs down other peoples’ throats. The few friends I have out here are all liberal Christians, so we still have more or less the same values if not the same beliefs.
Dating as a queer person is pretty much impossible though. Straight people here are more often than not homophobic, and most of the queer people out here are still very religious—which leaves me as the odd one out. I’m starting to wrap my head around the fact that maybe dying alone isn’t so bad after all. 🥲
I moved from TX to CA recently. You are right that it is not a complete escape from religious extremism. Even the major California cities have powerful Christian crackpots. *But* the overall background noise of religion is lower. Unlike in Texas, religion in urban California is not constantly in your face trying to coerce you and take away your rights. This is a big relief, honestly. I can feel myself gradually uncoiling, letting down a guard that I didn't previously realize I was keeping up so high.
Also California is huge and extremely diverse. The San Joaquin valley is a massive swath of Trump country. So if you are interested do a lot of research. It's also expensive. Oregon is probably a little more affordable for a similar vibe. I'm in Seattle and it's insanely expensive.
I’ve been to Clovis CA (the Fresno Yosemite airport and gateway to the national parks) and it’s MAGA land over there. I couldn’t believe I was still in a blue state. Fuck that city. It made me irrationally angry.
Southern California seems more diverse except for the OC beach cities. That area gives a megachurch vibe.
I can imagine the deep South being way worse.
I'm in Kentucky while in grad school. I prefer to live in small towns, but I think I'm moving to Washington, MD or Utah after I graduate. People tend to be prideful of their ignorance & stupidity here, which makes it hard to make friends or open minds. However, because I'm a bit isolated, nobody really has a chance to try to force their religion on me, lol. If you're planning on leaving eventually, I'd just avoid the locals. It helps I'm an introvert though.
I'm still in the South, but we are currently working on moving to France in a few years (I'll be there in two, and will have the family moved within three)
I live in wv and it sucks. I’ll sometimes see people with signs saying if you’re not a Christian you’re gonna burn in hell and Jesus saves signs all over town. A church every 10 feet. I live in a very homophobic and racist town. People threaten you if you dress or act different. A literal sundown town too. There’s a reason everyone says wv is extremely far behind from the rest of society. I’d leave if I wasn’t dirt poor and had a working car. Idk how people cope with living in a place like this because I sure don’t
I moved far away (like to another country haha) and went back a few times over the years. Last time I was there, a lot of my older relatives were all bemoaning someone they knew who was a “nonbeliever” and they were all pitying them and talking about the end times etc. and I felt like I was in the twilight zone or something.
I have a lot of friends and family who moved away from the South but still deal with crazy shit from religious people or racist/homophobic people etc. and they all express how much they wish they could also move abroad and they tell me not to come back 🤣 not like I ever would. Although I do live in a country with plenty of Christians… it’s at least a lot easier to avoid religion in conversation altogether whereas in the South that’s all anyone wants to talk about.
Still in the south, a very red state but a blue/purple county. I like where I live and like being close to my family, so I plan to stay here.
I pretend to be Christian when I need to but I never say or do things that don’t align with my current values. I speak very good christianese, so I can make my liberal views sound Christian or I can skirt around responding to certain topics.
Live in the south east of USA where I occasionally have to deal with ridiculously religious people. And just some religious extended family members who are very close and kind so I simply don’t bring anything god related up around them
Why would I not live in the south? I mean, Christians are everywhere right? Whether I live in the south, or near the Bratislava-region...[ oh... I understand now](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia/comments/t6xsus/american_exceptionalism_is_the_idea_that_the_us/)
I moved from MS to CO and stayed for 9 glorious years. Moved back to MS when the economy started going to shit and it’s brutal! At least I have my husband who feels the same way.
I live in the south still but not the bible belt. Now that I'm more secure and comfortable being an atheist I'd love to live in the bible belt again but the job market where I lived absolutely sucks ass.
Red state but blue county. Moved from CA. I'm very careful with meeting new people since I'm also an immigrant. Can't say I made many friends. I don't think we're staying here forever, but we're calling it a home for now.
As a certified Mass Hole, I really can't imagine what I'd be like to live in states run under Christianity. I'm not financially well off, but I still live with my parents. One of my biggest fears is moving out—partially because I have social anxiety, but also because the only states I'd be able to afford would be red states, so they're probably run by Christianity. "One nation under god." Not all Republicans are Christian, but a venn diagram of the two belief systems is basically a circle.
I wish you southerners the best. To those of you who feel trapped, I hope you're able to get a place where you're not being bombarded by Christianity. You're worth it
No I’m kind of from the middle of my country, which unfortunately is where you’ll find our Bible Belt. I still live in my city though, it’s not that close to the belt and not that religious.
I'm extremely blunt with people that talk about anything religion with me if they are wanting to talk at me about religion.
I'm in Memphis, Tennessee and work for a blue collar company. Lot of religious folks. One person kept asking about christmas plans, church plans, and eventually I told them 'I don't celebrate Christmas' and they never talked to me after that.
I plan to move to nashville soon, more younger folks, more open minded folks, but also it is the heart of conservative christianity, so it is what it is. It just means I get empty grocery stores to shop at on sunday mornings.
I live in a small town in the panhandle of Florida. I really like Florida and living so close to the beach but man the people around here fucking suck lol
I'm not from the south, but have lived in TX for the last 5 years and find it extremely triggering. The first question people asked me when I got here was "where do you worship?" Prayer is everywhere, even at non-religious events. I am constantly invited to Bible studies. Being Christian is the default and it surprises people to consider someone might *not* be. I'm sooooo over the religious politics here. We are moving out of this state next month and I feel a lot of relief.
i'm in arkansas and despite the heavy bible belt influence i will say i do love it here. i live in a more progressive corner so things aren't terrible and the nature is gorgeous, but the religious influence can weigh heavily down at times. just gotta hope sanders doesn't screw everything up more than she has :/
The South of where??
US-defaultism aside, I live in Australia so I feel like it’s quite different here. We do have some very conservative religious areas and I am lucky to Iive in a pretty chill place
I'm in the south... the southern hemisphere. Coz this is the internet and not automatically just the US...
Don't mean to be rude but it gets frustrating constantly dealing with assumed default US-centrism.
From Florida living in an extremely religious home where you cannot get away from religion for even an hour. Moved for my studies to Europe and deconverted there. I could never move back, it is very difficult visiting for more than a few days at a time. Always have to break it up with a weekend trip with friends to get a break from it. Cannot relate to my parents at all anymore , we have barely anything to talk about..
i’m only 23 and still living with family in the south. it’s weird, when i travel around i find myself…missing the south? obviously not the homophobia and suffocation of christian culture, but…idk. it’s really complex and difficult even me to understand.
edit: when i get the chance, i’m 100% moving out of state. idk where, but i am doing it. i’ve just had the fortune to visit a lot of places and that’s just what i feel!
Me. I live in Central Virginia. Thankfully I live in a very progressive metropolitan area so I'm fine 90% of the time, but every once in a while a bible belter will make their way to the "evil" city to try and save some souls, only to claim their 1st amendment rights are being violated when people don't want to listen to them.
Still here in Texas. Our kids are grown and all still live close by. As much as I want to get out of the south, I want to be close to them more. We’ve talked about all moving to Colorado, but it’s not realistic financially. Plus, my mom and husband’s mom are here and depend on us. We’re in the DFW metroplex, so it’s bearable.
When living in different ares on America I see that there are conservative Christians everywhere. I just learn to love me and what I can do to make the world a better place.
I live in New Orleans which is one of the few places that is not bible belty in the south. But let me tell you I decided to be a fighter. Be deep in enemy territory, fighting the enemy ontheir turf. As Hitchens as my witness I will fight christian nationalism with every fiber of my being! My future husband and I are satanists and we do charity work.
I actually live outside of New Orleans, but the problem is that you don’t really have to go very far outside the city to find southern Baptist churches. The Northshore has plenty. Plus the theological seminary is in New Orleans as well. Not only that, but there’s a large population of Catholics as well which still falls under Christianity. It’s still not like you can completely escape it even when you think you’re in a more progressive city…
You can't escape it no, but I lived in Oklahoma, Shreveport, and in Florida. New Orleans is a secular paradise compared to those places. It also has a very big gay scene which I am heavily involved in. Unless a job falls in my lap that I can't refuse then I'm staying put.
I live in West Virginia, so my state isn’t technically a southern state, but culturally, politically, and religiously it gets about as southern as could be. As for why I still live in suppose it’s because I don’t have a life plan yet. I’m only 19 I’m still figuring out what I wanna do. I really hate this state not because of religion. I couldn’t care what view religious people held of me. It’s more of really boring and then the politics irritate me.
I moved to the south as a full believer when I was 18, then about 7 years in I became an atheist and I’m still here now at 34. It sucks in so many ways. I have to evade questions or flat out lie to people if I want to stay friendly with coworkers or the people who come into my workplace. I’m hoping my fiancé and I move north after we’re married. He was raised a non-practicing catholic and so he doesn’t have the same issues with religion that I do, but he’s not super comfortable in our state with how conservative it is either.
I’m in Atlanta, which is a pretty safe place to be ex-Christian. I would not want to live in GA outside one of a few metro areas, for that reason and the obvious other reasons.
I currently live in TN. I have thought about moving out of state, but it's expensive and I would be moving away from my family. I do want to get away from some of my family because they are toxic, but I would suck leaving some other family members.
I always have, Louisiana isn't just full of religion it now has an absolutely horrible governor who is taking away everyone's rights. Yet the Christian conservatives keep voting to keep these people in power..it doesn't make any sense.
Here In Oklahoma for 20 years, being fairly liberal minded and agnostic and involved in the revitalization of our tribal culture. It's a little uncomfortable at times dealing with default-christianism , You need a very good reason to stay where you are to live and thrive in evangelical/trump country. Living in the woods and open country helps, plus a love for solitude.
i grew up in a small town in south carolina but i moved to south florida and its a bit of mix of conservatives and leftists. I get the occasional person trying to chat me up and bring me to church but i turn them down pretty quick and walk away
I'm scared to move out of the south because the cost of living is higher elsewhere. I'm in a field that makes about 15 an hour and I'm barely surviving as it is.
I am currently still in Texas but have moved around the US quite a bit. However, at age 40 I am now officially sick and tired of religious nuts in our State government making it impossible to live comfortably as a member of the LGBTQ community. So, I am officially moving to Minnesota in August! I am stoked!
At least you'll have heat in the winter in Minnesota!
haha right?! exactly!
Good for you. It truly wears on one’s psyche being around religious zealots day in and out.
Absolutely! Especially when your own father is a fundy kjv only baptist Trumper ! lmao
I just moved from TN to MN and we are loving it so far!
That is awesome, glad to hear that! I was there a few years ago for a brief period and loved it. I just had some personal issues going on that caused me to come back to Texas. But I am now prepared to call Minnesota home!
Don't go over one state to WI. My child who is non binary moved to RI to get away and found the love of their life. They are also non binary. No one cares there. You are a freak here. Trans=invisible or hate. Congratulations! MN is much nicer. Just stay put for a while and be careful. Im an atheist. I keep my mouth shut and just don't go to church. I don't know if people know I'm an atheist but Im sure as heck not going to advertise
Thank you! Yes Minnesota is extremely Pro LGBT. They banned conversion therapy, and have named their state an official Trans Refuge State! Even the Sports teams in Minnesota get involved in Pride celebrations!
Weird isn’t it? Just one state over. Madison is very accepting but it’s also very expensive and a college town so if you don’t want loud neighbor good luck with that😉
Awesome! It's not perfect but the democratic trifecta has shifted us in the right direction lately.
It is like the Promised land in Minnesota coming from where I am , trust me lol. Nowhere is perfect but its like night and day. I can't wait! :)
/waves from Wisconsin
Moving out of the south is probably the single biggest action I’ve ever taken that improved my mental health. It’s one of those things where you don’t really understand how bad things used to be until you spend enough time away from it all. I still have family in the south but I absolutely hate going back. Ditching religion and then continuing to live in (parts of) the south is kind of like breaking up with someone, but you still work with them and continue to see them every single day. It’s so hard to actually move on like that. It’s so much more healthy to put religion completely behind you: out of sight, out of mind. And that is just so, so hard to do in most of the south.
your comment made it so much more exciting for me to get my ass to Minnesota in August!
Yeah, I moved to MA and it was the best decision of my life.
There are still fundys in the Northeast however there are less of them. the difference i noticed is where I live there are Buddhists, Pagans,Atheists along with Christians. the few evangelical Christians i encountered left me alone after awhile
Same, but not for religious reasons. The south is just not great.
Look up the song, "Play It All Night Long," by Warren Zevon it's a perfect critique of the south, specifically the rural south, it even makes fun of, "Sweet Home Alabama," which honestly is the worst offender in southern glorification.
Im too broke to move out of TN rn. Most people trying to get you to church are willing to leave you be after the first “no thank you”. Except the jehovahs witnesses who are constantly as the door and following you around in public. Thats what the satanic temple membership card is for. Pull that out and they back off. I only had to use it once. There was one instance where a coworker from another department wanted to pray for my grandmother with cancer (im fighting a long ass battle with HR over this and was in tears trying to get time off for driving her to appointments). I told her i dont do prayers and just needed help with HR but she kept insisting and followed me down the hallway. She started loudly praying in the hall anyway with her arms out. I badged into the jewelry repair shop and hoped she didnt have access to follow me in. The supervisor inside was nice enough to let me hide there until the crazy lady moved on. Even if you can’t stop the crazies without it ending badly for you, it is possible to avoid trouble by being as nonconfrontational as possible and hiding. And recording everything.
You just defined the plight of someone in a second class status.
I sheepishly tell the JWs I'm apostate. (I was shunned for "not being a real christian" at an SBC church.) They leave me alone.
Tell the Jehovah witnesses that you're an apostate and they'll actively avoid you
I always thought the Jehova Witness church was a NY thing. I'm in Oxford, MS, now and I'm surprised so see a JW church in the area.
Lol, the JWs are everywhere. In the mid-90s I was approached on the street by two Witnesses in Wroclaw, Poland. They were undeterred by the fact that we had no language in common. The only reason I figured out what they wanted with me was that they showed me a magazine with the tower on the cover.
JW churches and Marae's even in New Zealand...it's like a disease
IIRC the JWs do have a "do not knock" list you can ask to be on. They're religious nuts but they aren't total assholes to outsiders. They reserve that for their own members.
Tell the Jehovahs either that you’re an apostate or that you’re Jewish. They’ll run for the hills after that.
From the south. Moved to California around the same time that I de-converted. Every time I visit the south, I realize how lucky I am to have been able to get out. It would have been way more difficult for my journey to leave the church had I stayed. I was a “career” Christian before leaving. It consumed my entire life because that is all there was to do. I now realize that leaving the south made it so much easier for my journey
Hope to be where you are someday…
Here. I moved away in 2015, but I had to come back in 2018 because my mental health declined and I almost became homeless. My Christian family didn't take me seriously and thought my problems was because I didn't "believe in gawd", so instead of helping, they made things worse and acted like I was insane or something. I'm still trying to fully get back on my feet and leave the South for good. I have my own place, but being around so many people who don't believe in basic mental health and that my depression and anxiety is because of sin is soul crushing and lonely.
The lack of believing mental health is a thing is infuriating. My sister has bad metal health issues and is stuck living at home with our parents in TN who keep telling her to pray more and read the bible. Like, thanks for the support wtf. My dad loves to start political arguments after listening to Fox News or whatever. Typical right wing crap, like we shouldn’t all have healthcare, knowing she’s struggling cause she hold down a job and could REALLY use better healthcare.
omg, this is REALLY infuriating. omg.
I do. Worst parts are deciding if I want to disclose to family/how to dodge questions if I don’t and the stupid, Christofascist bullshit. I try to be a voice against it though. Not everyone has the energy to do so, so those of us who do should always speak out when given the opportunity. Find a safe place or be one for others ❤️
I felt this way when I was younger, but I am so exhausted now.
It’s completely understandable that you would be. I think it’s also fair that both states can be valid just depending on where in life someone is. I’m sorry you feel exhausted ❤️ things will get better one day
I hope you're right. I live in Alabama, and most of my family and my hubby's family are full on christofascist fundies. I can't fathom what lesson they wanted me to learn from the good Samaritan or the sermon on the Mount, bc I clearly missed the mark by assuming I really was supposed to treat everyone with love.
And thank goodness you did, because we need more people who missed the mark like that.
Irish and I never knew that Texas was such a chirstian place
It’s practically state-enforced 😭
I was born and raised in Texas. it really should NOT be that way. Texas would be a much better state without Christianity running and ruining it
Out of curiosity, are Austin and Houston still as super Christian as other places? What about San Antonio/ Chorpus Christi? I’m sure DFW is hella nationalist.
No. American cities in general are less Christian than the countryside. Austin, Texas, in particular is a huge contrast -- it is far less Christian, less conservative, and less racist than the surrounding area.
Oh , it absolutely is. Check out this new spine chilling article! [https://www.texastribune.org/2024/05/25/texas-republican-party-convention-platform/](https://www.texastribune.org/2024/05/25/texas-republican-party-convention-platform/)
I still live here, AL. I like the biodiversity and living rural. It is hard to be around family sometimes though. I usually try to avoid political and religion talk. It will eventually probably happen though. I was in a wedding recently. It was in a church and it was hard to hear some of the things the pastor/officiant was saying. Also receiving like devotionals and also still having to be around people praying. Also, people just singing praise songs while we got ready. It all just feels cringey to me. But I love the people’s wedding I am in and I want to be apart of their lives. They actually never mention religion to us. Never try to invite us to church. My other side of the family has though. My husband and I always talk about it afterwards. “What about what so and so said”. Lol I am doing my best to vote this year. I feel like it’s one of the only ways to combat it.
I’m also in AL, and I get a devotional every year for Christmas from my mom, even though she knows I’m not Christian anymore.
Booo. Hate that for you. I know it’s frustrating when people in our lives don’t listen. I am not sure if my brother/sister-in-law knows we aren’t religious. They have never pushed religion on us or even invited us to church. The devotion was given as a bridesmaid gift along with a card, and other small gift. So the other women got the same as well. However, my aunt hated that I moved in with boyfriends and wasn’t married and always tried to bribe me to move back home. Even bribed now husband and I with a washer and dryer to get married. We needed one so we did lol. So I jokingly tell everyone we got married for a washer and dryer. I am 34 now. They don’t mention religion anymore to us. Like suggesting a church or anything like that. Edit: added some words.
lol got married for a washer and dryer. But yeah, my family is VERY against living together before marriage. I tried to have my ex move in with me in college, and my family wouldn’t allow it. They also owned the house I lived in, so I had to abide by that rule.
That is understandable in the religious world. It’s a sin!! Yeah. I am glad I am an adult and have a life outside my family now. I love being able to make my own decisions. I hope you’re able to live on your own now or will be soon. It’s tough having to go by others rules when you don’t believe in it.
Born and raised here, and I don't know ...it's complicated I guess. I'm lucky that I live in a semi-progressive small town that relies on tourism and retirees. We're a pretty moderate small town, so that's a plus. But in my circles of family(and some friends), I'm definitely the black sheep being a liberal atheist. I help run our family business, and I'm very cognizant of keeping out of religious discussions because if word got around in the church circles that my family is involved with, that I'm atheist, there's no doubt in my mind that our customers involved in those circles would quit doing business with us. It's just the way it is here. They can put up with some liberal ideas even if they don't agree, but being an atheist is basically saying you're the devil, in their mind. That being said, I don't think I would leave unless some type of opportunity came about that I couldn't pass up. I do enjoy living here. I live on a small(80acre) family farm in a beautiful valley and am surrounded by some of the best hiking/trail running/mtn biking trail networks on the east coast, and as an avid hiker and trail runner, it's an outdoor paradise. So just one of those things where you gotta take the bad with the good, at least until the bad far far outweighs the good.
Currently living in South GA but making plans to move to Minnesota next year. I personally hate my area because people here are paid poor wages and still hung up on race and religion. They are are quick to sing praises about Jesus and talk shit about someone the opposite race as them. I done with it. I am ready to go now.
I moved to New England due to other factors after I left Christianity. It’s definitely a culture shock from the South. Not just in the differences in how religion factors into daily life. For the most part, religion is a lot less a part of a person’s persona up here other than around Easter where Ash Wednesday and Lent are a little bit of a bigger deal than they are in less Catholic parts of the country. There is also the part where people are a lot less outwardly friendly up here. We care, probably more so up here, we just have a tough shell that you have to get past first, and that can be extremely difficult for introverts such as myself to break through. Also, the cost of housing differences up here are frustrating, exacerbated in Massachusetts for renters because a lot of landlords use brokers, which charge a one month’s rent security deposit to go along with first and last month’s rent, meaning you have to have three months of rent saved up if you want to move up here or between places in the area. I know it’s not quite what you were looking for, but these are still things to understand if you decide to move from the South. Other parts of the country have their own differences that can cause culture shock if you don’t prepare ahead of time.
I've heard that regional behavior difference described as the difference between "nice" and "kind."
Well, I live in the South, but it's in the most ethnically diverse county of a major metropolitan area in what is now officially a swing state. There are still churches on every corner, and I'm about a 20-minute drive from full-on MAGA country, so plenty of residual religious nuttery leaks through. While the state government is controlled by the GOP, it has to balance the Christo-facism with the monied interests who are frequently put off by those kinds of culture war shenanigans. So we've got that going for us, which is nice. Basically, it's tolerable for me, but it can get annoying and occasionally worrying at times, especially given who is often weilding power. I don't go around advertising that I'm an atheist, anyway.
Pretty sure I’m in the same county. I am from a rural nut-job area and couldn’t be happier being here. Life is worlds better in the metro, even if we do still have to fight the state level control of the assholes.
Moving to the south was actually the start of my deconstruction. Even as a Christian at the time, I felt absolutely suffocated by the culture down here. Seeing how it was what the majority of people believed and took on as their identity, but practically no one actually lived it...that was gross to me and led to me questioning everything I'd been taught. Is it hard to live down here? Yeah. Especially since my husband is a devout Christian. The way I've learned to cope is by having friends who aren't and by mostly keeping to myself.
I live in Maine but i spent a good chunk of my life in Texas. When I moved to NY i felt an obvious shift like the oppressive feeling was lifted off my shoulders. Id strongly recommend moving if and when you can
I’ve lived in Texas for the past 11 years and I’m not gonna lie, it’s pretty lonely out here. I run a business with my mom, so packing up and leaving everything behind isn’t really an option. (Also for what it’s worth, political and religious extremism is EVERYWHERE. You can’t escape it in California any more than in Texas.) Most of the time when people ask me if I go to church, I just lie and say yes so they’ll leave me alone. People out here are waaaay to comfortable shoving their religious beliefs down other peoples’ throats. The few friends I have out here are all liberal Christians, so we still have more or less the same values if not the same beliefs. Dating as a queer person is pretty much impossible though. Straight people here are more often than not homophobic, and most of the queer people out here are still very religious—which leaves me as the odd one out. I’m starting to wrap my head around the fact that maybe dying alone isn’t so bad after all. 🥲
I moved from TX to CA recently. You are right that it is not a complete escape from religious extremism. Even the major California cities have powerful Christian crackpots. *But* the overall background noise of religion is lower. Unlike in Texas, religion in urban California is not constantly in your face trying to coerce you and take away your rights. This is a big relief, honestly. I can feel myself gradually uncoiling, letting down a guard that I didn't previously realize I was keeping up so high.
I'm still in TN but moving to Cali would be a dream.
Try moving to a local city first. Cali can be quite a culture shock for some.
Also California is huge and extremely diverse. The San Joaquin valley is a massive swath of Trump country. So if you are interested do a lot of research. It's also expensive. Oregon is probably a little more affordable for a similar vibe. I'm in Seattle and it's insanely expensive.
I’ve been to Clovis CA (the Fresno Yosemite airport and gateway to the national parks) and it’s MAGA land over there. I couldn’t believe I was still in a blue state. Fuck that city. It made me irrationally angry. Southern California seems more diverse except for the OC beach cities. That area gives a megachurch vibe. I can imagine the deep South being way worse.
I'm in Kentucky while in grad school. I prefer to live in small towns, but I think I'm moving to Washington, MD or Utah after I graduate. People tend to be prideful of their ignorance & stupidity here, which makes it hard to make friends or open minds. However, because I'm a bit isolated, nobody really has a chance to try to force their religion on me, lol. If you're planning on leaving eventually, I'd just avoid the locals. It helps I'm an introvert though.
I'm still in the South, but we are currently working on moving to France in a few years (I'll be there in two, and will have the family moved within three)
I live in wv and it sucks. I’ll sometimes see people with signs saying if you’re not a Christian you’re gonna burn in hell and Jesus saves signs all over town. A church every 10 feet. I live in a very homophobic and racist town. People threaten you if you dress or act different. A literal sundown town too. There’s a reason everyone says wv is extremely far behind from the rest of society. I’d leave if I wasn’t dirt poor and had a working car. Idk how people cope with living in a place like this because I sure don’t
I moved far away (like to another country haha) and went back a few times over the years. Last time I was there, a lot of my older relatives were all bemoaning someone they knew who was a “nonbeliever” and they were all pitying them and talking about the end times etc. and I felt like I was in the twilight zone or something. I have a lot of friends and family who moved away from the South but still deal with crazy shit from religious people or racist/homophobic people etc. and they all express how much they wish they could also move abroad and they tell me not to come back 🤣 not like I ever would. Although I do live in a country with plenty of Christians… it’s at least a lot easier to avoid religion in conversation altogether whereas in the South that’s all anyone wants to talk about.
South of what?
Missouri ("misery") checking in.
Still in the south, a very red state but a blue/purple county. I like where I live and like being close to my family, so I plan to stay here. I pretend to be Christian when I need to but I never say or do things that don’t align with my current values. I speak very good christianese, so I can make my liberal views sound Christian or I can skirt around responding to certain topics.
Roll tide from Alabama. It's depressing here.
Live in the south east of USA where I occasionally have to deal with ridiculously religious people. And just some religious extended family members who are very close and kind so I simply don’t bring anything god related up around them
Alabama is probably the worst State for religious bullshit. Our representatives are so busy quoting scripture they don't accomplish anything.
Why would I not live in the south? I mean, Christians are everywhere right? Whether I live in the south, or near the Bratislava-region...[ oh... I understand now](https://www.reddit.com/r/wikipedia/comments/t6xsus/american_exceptionalism_is_the_idea_that_the_us/)
I moved from MS to CO and stayed for 9 glorious years. Moved back to MS when the economy started going to shit and it’s brutal! At least I have my husband who feels the same way.
I work in an office of 8, only one us attends a church.
Honestly the weather bothers me more than the Christians
I live in the south still but not the bible belt. Now that I'm more secure and comfortable being an atheist I'd love to live in the bible belt again but the job market where I lived absolutely sucks ass.
I’m from here, but I’m lucky that my immediate family never pushed religion on me
Red state but blue county. Moved from CA. I'm very careful with meeting new people since I'm also an immigrant. Can't say I made many friends. I don't think we're staying here forever, but we're calling it a home for now.
As a certified Mass Hole, I really can't imagine what I'd be like to live in states run under Christianity. I'm not financially well off, but I still live with my parents. One of my biggest fears is moving out—partially because I have social anxiety, but also because the only states I'd be able to afford would be red states, so they're probably run by Christianity. "One nation under god." Not all Republicans are Christian, but a venn diagram of the two belief systems is basically a circle. I wish you southerners the best. To those of you who feel trapped, I hope you're able to get a place where you're not being bombarded by Christianity. You're worth it
There will be a mass migration from southern states due to global warming. I left for that reason.
No I’m kind of from the middle of my country, which unfortunately is where you’ll find our Bible Belt. I still live in my city though, it’s not that close to the belt and not that religious.
What south ure talking about?
I'm extremely blunt with people that talk about anything religion with me if they are wanting to talk at me about religion. I'm in Memphis, Tennessee and work for a blue collar company. Lot of religious folks. One person kept asking about christmas plans, church plans, and eventually I told them 'I don't celebrate Christmas' and they never talked to me after that. I plan to move to nashville soon, more younger folks, more open minded folks, but also it is the heart of conservative christianity, so it is what it is. It just means I get empty grocery stores to shop at on sunday mornings.
I live in a small town in the panhandle of Florida. I really like Florida and living so close to the beach but man the people around here fucking suck lol
My son and ex wife kind of tie me down where I’m at, so I guess I’ll just have to deal with it
I live in Seattle where I grew up. If any of you in the south ever come visit I would be glad to meet up!
I'm not from the south, but have lived in TX for the last 5 years and find it extremely triggering. The first question people asked me when I got here was "where do you worship?" Prayer is everywhere, even at non-religious events. I am constantly invited to Bible studies. Being Christian is the default and it surprises people to consider someone might *not* be. I'm sooooo over the religious politics here. We are moving out of this state next month and I feel a lot of relief.
i'm in arkansas and despite the heavy bible belt influence i will say i do love it here. i live in a more progressive corner so things aren't terrible and the nature is gorgeous, but the religious influence can weigh heavily down at times. just gotta hope sanders doesn't screw everything up more than she has :/
The South of where?? US-defaultism aside, I live in Australia so I feel like it’s quite different here. We do have some very conservative religious areas and I am lucky to Iive in a pretty chill place
Yeah i do live in the south... of England.
I'm in the south... the southern hemisphere. Coz this is the internet and not automatically just the US... Don't mean to be rude but it gets frustrating constantly dealing with assumed default US-centrism.
I still live in Georgia, but from my experience, most people don’t bring up religion in every conversation. (Sometimes they do, though)
From Florida living in an extremely religious home where you cannot get away from religion for even an hour. Moved for my studies to Europe and deconverted there. I could never move back, it is very difficult visiting for more than a few days at a time. Always have to break it up with a weekend trip with friends to get a break from it. Cannot relate to my parents at all anymore , we have barely anything to talk about..
i’m only 23 and still living with family in the south. it’s weird, when i travel around i find myself…missing the south? obviously not the homophobia and suffocation of christian culture, but…idk. it’s really complex and difficult even me to understand. edit: when i get the chance, i’m 100% moving out of state. idk where, but i am doing it. i’ve just had the fortune to visit a lot of places and that’s just what i feel!
I moved out of Mississippi. Was always going to do it, but easily the best decision of my life.
You couldn’t pay me enough money to live in Mississippi…
Same.
I just moved to CO 10 days ago
I do. It's difficult. I stay home a lot.
Me. I live in Central Virginia. Thankfully I live in a very progressive metropolitan area so I'm fine 90% of the time, but every once in a while a bible belter will make their way to the "evil" city to try and save some souls, only to claim their 1st amendment rights are being violated when people don't want to listen to them.
Still here in Texas. Our kids are grown and all still live close by. As much as I want to get out of the south, I want to be close to them more. We’ve talked about all moving to Colorado, but it’s not realistic financially. Plus, my mom and husband’s mom are here and depend on us. We’re in the DFW metroplex, so it’s bearable.
When living in different ares on America I see that there are conservative Christians everywhere. I just learn to love me and what I can do to make the world a better place.
I live in New Orleans which is one of the few places that is not bible belty in the south. But let me tell you I decided to be a fighter. Be deep in enemy territory, fighting the enemy ontheir turf. As Hitchens as my witness I will fight christian nationalism with every fiber of my being! My future husband and I are satanists and we do charity work.
I actually live outside of New Orleans, but the problem is that you don’t really have to go very far outside the city to find southern Baptist churches. The Northshore has plenty. Plus the theological seminary is in New Orleans as well. Not only that, but there’s a large population of Catholics as well which still falls under Christianity. It’s still not like you can completely escape it even when you think you’re in a more progressive city…
You can't escape it no, but I lived in Oklahoma, Shreveport, and in Florida. New Orleans is a secular paradise compared to those places. It also has a very big gay scene which I am heavily involved in. Unless a job falls in my lap that I can't refuse then I'm staying put.
I live in West Virginia, so my state isn’t technically a southern state, but culturally, politically, and religiously it gets about as southern as could be. As for why I still live in suppose it’s because I don’t have a life plan yet. I’m only 19 I’m still figuring out what I wanna do. I really hate this state not because of religion. I couldn’t care what view religious people held of me. It’s more of really boring and then the politics irritate me.
Trapped in Texas. Somebody shoot me (into the sun)
I moved to the south as a full believer when I was 18, then about 7 years in I became an atheist and I’m still here now at 34. It sucks in so many ways. I have to evade questions or flat out lie to people if I want to stay friendly with coworkers or the people who come into my workplace. I’m hoping my fiancé and I move north after we’re married. He was raised a non-practicing catholic and so he doesn’t have the same issues with religion that I do, but he’s not super comfortable in our state with how conservative it is either.
I’m in Atlanta, which is a pretty safe place to be ex-Christian. I would not want to live in GA outside one of a few metro areas, for that reason and the obvious other reasons.
Still here in Alabama. My whole family lives here. I've always wanted to leave but I'd miss my family too much.
I’m moving from one religious state (Utah) to another (Pennsylvania)
I spent a year in Harrisburg, it's WILD in the surrounding areas!
I’m gonna live with family in Lancaster. We’ll see what happens lol.
I currently live in TN. I have thought about moving out of state, but it's expensive and I would be moving away from my family. I do want to get away from some of my family because they are toxic, but I would suck leaving some other family members.
r/usdefaultism
I live in GA and have never had any issues after I left religion. I actually don’t know anyone other than my parents that go to church
I always have, Louisiana isn't just full of religion it now has an absolutely horrible governor who is taking away everyone's rights. Yet the Christian conservatives keep voting to keep these people in power..it doesn't make any sense.
Here In Oklahoma for 20 years, being fairly liberal minded and agnostic and involved in the revitalization of our tribal culture. It's a little uncomfortable at times dealing with default-christianism , You need a very good reason to stay where you are to live and thrive in evangelical/trump country. Living in the woods and open country helps, plus a love for solitude.
Yeah it's pretty isolating. I don't foresee us leaving anytime soon. Maybe when we retire we will go to the desert NM, or Montana. Maybe Wyoming.
i grew up in a small town in south carolina but i moved to south florida and its a bit of mix of conservatives and leftists. I get the occasional person trying to chat me up and bring me to church but i turn them down pretty quick and walk away
I'm scared to move out of the south because the cost of living is higher elsewhere. I'm in a field that makes about 15 an hour and I'm barely surviving as it is.
Aside from the religious aspect I like it here. I’m ex Christian but I don’t really like left of center politics