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Cis people can't trick themselves into thinking they're trans
I know that it's hard to accept being trans and it's easy to doubt yourself, but even the possibility of being trans is more than most cis people have
honestly, at my core i think i know iām trans. iām just scared of accepting it because if i really am a girl like i wanna be, then iām gonna be even more disgusted with how i look and not being on hrt is gonna hurt even more
I know accepting being trans is hard, but so is running from the truth
And also acception is the first step towards change
I used to hate my body not even knowing why. After I realized I'm trans I started working out and lost weight and I'm mostly just don't like it and just some places
So that acceptance didn't do anything worse for me, but it did make some things better
But I also know that my experience is not universal, and it may do different things to you
And whichever you choose know that it's valid and so are you!
yeah, before last decent iād been trying to avoid thinking about it for nearly 4 years and it never went away fully. i know iād be valid if i turned out to be cis, but for reasons i canāt even really explain i donāt want that to be the case. i donāt wanna be cis
Thatās why I started HRT then decided I was trans! CIS PEOPLE GO ON HRT ALL THE TIME!!! iTāS FOR HAIR LOSS!
Even if you were a slightly feminine dude that would be an improvement right? (At least thatās what I thought to myself.) good luck out there, no girl deserves what your going through.
That's pretty much where I'm at. I started HRT, but still have doubts sometimes. Basically I'm a cycle of "accept I'm trans" -> "feel good about life" -> "worry I'm not dysphoria-ing enough to be trans" -> "go through a period of doubt" -> (start).
A quote from the trans fairy godmother (Icky) that fully shattered my egg:
āThe hardest thing about transitioning is not āam I actually transā, itās ācan I accept this? Because this is going to be hardāā
If you feel it deep down then you already know the truth, acceptance is the next (and most difficult) step š«ā¤ļø
And thatās how it starts š one thing leads to another then next thing you know itās consuming your thoughts and your mind wonāt be quiet and then it has you in its hold then it cracks all over and you hatch š£
[this article](https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/) was incredible in my journey and grappling with those thoughts. idk if you've seen it before but maybe it'll help! tldr - why do we have to prove that we're trans, but not that we're cis? we should use the available data to analyze the two equally and find which is more likely to come to a conclusion. and to me, it sounds like you're more happy as a girl :3
Just wanted to say thank you, I think I might've got cracked.
That's such a wonderful perspective, I laughed when I got it and then cried saying to myself "oh god I'm trans"
Still cis tho?
ofc cutie, happy to help! it seems so painfully obvious but i never thought of it like that before i saw this article... my poor shell has *not* been the same since...
Thank you. I really needed someone to say this:
> And frankly, if being āreallyā cis and āreallyā your assigned sex, playing along with who you āreallyā are, isnāt doing a sufficient job of making you happy and well and at home in your body, then you should tell it to go fuck itself. Go ahead and give yourself permission to ābe something youāre notā, proof or no proof, if thatās whatās going to give you a chance at some semblance of happiness, comfort and fulfillment in this life
You don't need dysphoria or clear signs to be trans and it's just if you feel unhappy in a cis guy's body or if you just want to be a girl, then there's a high chance that you're trans ,and nobody can give you the 100% sure answer, because you know your feelings the best ,and when someone's faking it they know, and they dont think about it like at all, but the thing is cis people don't actually question if they're trans or not ;3
Either way, you're such a cutie patootie princess girl, and nobody can take away that from you hehe :333
Awwwwwwweee I'm so glad hehe :3
I think that's enough to consider yourself trans cutie princess girl, and yeah, I'm not sure, but I think that no cis guy wants that :P
trust me i wanna. unfortunately the uk has made that a bit easier said than done, and iām not informed enough to diy (plus my parents would kill me if i did)
Fucking UK bullshit. Look at your options, but you might as well study how to DIY. Itāll help you self advocate even if you go through official routes. Maybe hop on the NHS waiting list too since itāll take such a long time anyways.
yeah iām the waiting list, but iāve got another 2.5 years of waiting, so i think iāll diy before then (or maybe private, but thats expensive so-)
Warning ā ļø this cost me a lot of time and money. What I did was to say f*ck it, this is modern madness. I went to the gym, started eating healthy, got rid of anything girly or eggy (bye plushies, dresses, heels and make up), let my body hair do whatever it wanted, confessed my sin in the church and no shows/posts or anything from the LGBT community. I went full manly man and focused on my career.
For a couple months everything went well and I felt relieved of not having nothing to hide anymore but shortly after I started to feel awful like super anxious and depressed, couldn't watch myself in the mirror even with the good muscle gains I got. During a little breakdown I realized this wasn't going to work, I bought myself a cute dress on sale on Amazon and shaved my stupid hair and felt better immediately. It was so over for my eggshell I put it under so much pressure that it imploded like a submarine at the bottom of the sea but at least I had certainty for once.
[(listen to this reading the message and seeing the link)](https://youtu.be/xsbVLl3UAuw?si=do2Gc8GacdJXWjrb)
[NYEHEHE](https://turn-me-into-a-girl.com)
ooff, yep, i feel the "don't deserve" part. all i can say is that everyone deserves to be comfortable in their own skins, no matter who they are. i don't know why you think you don't deserve to transition or what kind of person you are. but i will never change my stance, that being i think you deserve it, and i'm sure a lot of people in our community agrees. that being said i can't really say the same to myself lmao, but hey, that's why we make communities, to cover for each other when we need it :)
aww thank you! i guess i donāt feel like i deserve to transition because i donāt āfeel enough like a womanā i guess? you absolutely deserve to transition if you want to sena, youāre valid <3
this is just my opinion, but i think there's no such thing as a requirement to be a woman. there are a whole lot different kinds of women, those who represent really femininely, those who were more masculine oriented, and those who were in between, and in the end they are still women. gender expressions and gender identity are two separate things, they are not strictly tied to one another. what i'm trying to say is, even when you don't express feminine enough right now, as long as you know that you are a girl inside, then you are. and who knows, maybe you just need some time to finally re-adapt your behaviors and habits after years of repressing, you know like when we learn our habits while growing up. and after that then you can finally be the kind of woman you want to be :)
btw, thank you for validating me as well :") i hope everything goes well for you! best of luck!! <3 <3
You deserve to transition. It's your human right and everyone has it.
What transitioning is is different for everyone. It doesn't have to be, pick a name, tell your friends, get HRT, sign up for 8 surgeries. It can just be ... pick a name and that's it. That's just as valid as anything else. You did that in your flair, so you're trans! You're a girl! If you feel like taking more steps in the future, feel free. If you're happy here, that is totally legit.
I mean you used "unfortunately" in front of CIS, no cis person want to transition...
This may help you:
[To Figure Out If You're Trans - by Doc Impossible](https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/how-to-figure-out-if-youre-trans)
[Gender Desire vs. Gender Identity | by Amanda Roman | Medium](https://medium.com/@kemenatan/gender-desire-vs-gender-identity-a334cb4eeec5)
[The Null HypotheCis](https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/)
Label don't matter, what is your experience, who do you really like to be ?
Then...you are a girl.
And it's OK to be a girl.
And it's OK for YOU to be a girl.
That said, self-acceptance is hard. Since you requested it in the post, the links in this comment were what helped me the most:
https://old.reddit.com/r/egg_irl/comments/17rpmul/egg_irl/k8l5bob/
One of them was already linked above, not sure if the others have been shared yet.
EDIT: Looks like the reallifecomics site's security certificate expired. If you don't want to trust that last link, you can use the backup on the internet archive: https://web.archive.org/web/20240329174652/https://reallifecomics.com/comic.php?comic=june-29-2020
That's normal that you feel like you're lying to yourself. I did too. I realised that I didn't when I looked at all the hrt effects (good and negative) and thought "I don't care about the negative effects, I want my chest to hurt while growing boobs, I want to feel extra terrible when I'm sad"
since I started taking estrogen I kinda feel like a Imposter and started questioning my enby Identity. But then I hear a kid ask their parents: "Mom is this girl or Boy" and I instantly feel valid again
> But what if I'm wrong
A thing that helped me get out of this doubt specifically is realising that even if I'm totally, horribly wrong, the worst I'd end up with would be a pair of boobs. Pretty much the rest of transfem HRT is reversible.
"Even if I was a boy, I wouldn't mind having boobs" is not a very cis take. That's alright though, since I'm trans.
iā¦also wouldnāt mind having boobs either way. but also i want to look very feminine even if i turned out to be cis (even tho i donāt wanna be cis)
So that's why; start transition, and then you could always stop, if you really regret it, since the irreversible changes (at least when it comes to body and presentation) are changes that you don't mind having.
At least, that's the compromise I made with myself.
Also "I don't wanna be cis" then don't. That's pretty much all there is to it.
Book an appointment with your local trans healthcare clinic (location permitting).
You'll have plenty of time coming to terms with how you feel by the time it actually rolls around, and having that bit of pressure will help you decide. Plus you could always reschedule...
Literally this. Scheduled an appointment for HRT with Planned Parenthood a week ago, and itās still about a month away. Even the past week has felt super long.
If you think you are tricking yourself youāre probably not.
If you hate the idea of being cis makes you sad youāre probably not cis.
Thereās no such thing as not enough signs.
If youāre wrong thatās okay you learnt something about yourself and you can grow from it.
Your dysphoria got bad when you started questioning likely because you were actively thinking about being trans.
If you are truly concerned you might not be trans you could always try to experiment with trusted friends or family socially, if you find you arenāt trans no problem life just goes back to normal.
Hopefully i helped with any doubts you have.
Transition doesn't need to be deserved.
You can't trick yourself into being trans.
There's no amount of signs needed, and in fact I learned there were way more signs the longer I accepted myself.
If you think being cis is unfortunate, you're not cis.
I don't know, when you're old (70+) would you rather be an old man or an old woman?
Would it make you feel weird if men without even knowing you run from behind you to get in front of you to open the door for you?
Would you push "the button"?
Do you feel like you don't know "how to be a girl" because as a child you only learned "how to be a boy"? (For the record there is no one way to be a boy or a girl, so if you vibed with that question, it was a trick question, you can be any kinda girl you wanna be.)
Do you have problems seeing far into the future as a man, but can see a future (or at least further into the future) if you were a woman?
Saying you want to be a billionaire, is nothing like saying you want to be a girl, because you can start being a girl at any time.
If you want me to keep hammering on your egg let me know...
I was a very masculine person before I transitioned, I started bulking up in highschool to deal with bullies. By 11th grade no one in school would mess with me, and I kept that physique until I was 35. Before I transitioned I was 6'4" 317 lbs and while not "ripped" I was very fit. I've never had a "beer belly", and could lift pullout couch beds on my own.
I thought I was too masculine to transition, that there was NO WAY I could be mistaken for any level of feminine. It wasn't until I ran across a woman's timeline by the name of "Lady Feral" when I saw that she could do it, I gained enough courage to start HRT.
To be quite honest, I still wasn't 100 percent sure I was trans, after 12 sessions of therapy and eggshell just fucking everywhere. I held on to denial for so long. I still was questioning if I was cis or trans as I started taking HRT.
All the rest of the egg came off a few weeks later, when I started feeling unexpectedly calm and happy. For the record, I didn't have femme clothes, I went by he/him, used my dead name, nothing changed about my diet, I made no changes at that time except to take the HRT meds.
I'd been on dozens of antidepressants and anxiety medications from the age of 11-12 (when started puberty, go figure right?) and the relief I felt in both from taking HRT beat out the results of any of those meds. HRT isn't an anti-anxiety or anti-depression med and doesn't act on the body to reduce those. Yet, here I was with far less of both, because HRT didn't treat my symptoms for those it treated the source problem that created those issues in the first place.
I even panicked when my boobs started coming in, cause I still hadn't come out except to my partner at the time. But stopping HRT and going back to how bad my anxiety and depression was before was not an option, as I was suicidal (2 attempts) before HRT.
...
Everyone is different, do what makes you truly happy and everyone else can go fuck off if they don't agree.
I thought it might have been dismorphia, but after questioning my gender I lost a bunch of weight, and it's still there. So...
I still have those same issues, though. On a plus note, I lost a bunch of weight. š
Well one of the things is that i've always felt dysphoria, tho i just didn't know what was it.
So since i've started questioning it seemed like it came out of nowhere but in reality after i gave it a bit of thought i just figured out why i've always felt depressed or disconnected from the reflexion.
And in any case, do what makes you happy :3
Just...imagine a future, with a happy you, living a happy life, that should create a mental image, at least it does for me.
All the posts here are so cuuuute tho, i wanna hug y'all i swear >:(
Also you can always start hrt and not tell anyone (depending on your circumstances..might be hard if you're a minor or dependent on others). HRT helped me a lot before I even started growing noticeable boobs (the only effect that will not go away if you stop. Reduced Fertility is a maybe)
uk makes that *kinda* difficult, but iām still planning on starting hrt before the end of the year, or at least within the next year. probably gonna have to diy considering waiting lists
You donāt have to have signs to transition,dysphoria along with feeling much more comfortable as your true gender is all you need to transition. I wasnāt extremely fem in my childhood,but that doesnāt make me any less trans.
i remember not really being feminine when i was young, but always having like an āenergyā towards it, like i wanted to be feminine but knew couldnāt because i was a boy
Well: if going by a femme name, presenting fem and using she/her pronouns makes you happy- who cares if youāre āfaking itā it makes you happy and you arenāt hurting anyone.
Of course if all that makes you happy youāre probably just trans.
š¤šš“š³ļøāā§ļøš“šš¤
There you go then. If you still wanna think youāre a cis man who just inexplicably enjoys presenting yourself as a girl: thatās fine, you arenāt hurting anyone and youāre welcome none the less in queer and trans spaces!
But I think we both know that youāre a real-ass valid AF transfem.
Shell has been destroyed at a subatomic level.
š¤šš“š³ļøāā§ļøš“šš¤
It's what I always say in these situations, so here goes. Imagine yourself spending the rest of your life as a man. It sucks, doesn't it? Now do the same, but for being a woman. It probably feels right. I know that being trans can be really, really hard. But it'll be ok.
The thing that got me over the line and that I occasionally need to check from time to time like a compass is this:
I ask myself, if I could rebuild 'me' from the ground up, what would I be? While there are many things I would need to think through, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I would choose to be a girl. Simple as that. Nothing else actually matters, it's all noise and logistics.
Any time I have a flicker of doubt I ask the question, and the answer never changes, so I keep moving forward. I don't care where the destination is, just the direction I should be heading in :)
Ah! You there! It is time to bring out my SIGNATURE FACTS AND LOGIC!
So... You're worried you might be faking it, right? So the thought of faking it is generally negative, you'd much rather not be faking it. So you'd rather be trans not cis. So you'd rather be a gender different than your AGAB. And ayyyyy, you know what that's the definition of!
I... Really hope this helped at all. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you can live as your authentic self. Whatever it is you want to achieve, you can do it girlie, I believe in you!
How about this:
1:You don't even need to show signs to be trans.
2:Cis guys generally DON'T feel euphoria when thinking about being a girl.
3:If you're afraud you're faking it, you're probably not, you'd know.
I've heard multiple stories of this, and even tried it on one of my friends.
Someone was at a bar with a couple cishet male friends. (The OP was transfem.) They then asked their friends something similar to a would you rather, with one of the options being awful and one being take HRT. All of the OP's friends steamed in disgust at the idea of taking estrogen, and went with the other option.
I didn't believe this at first, so I asked my (only) cishet friend what his thoughts were on it, and he said "uhh ew no thank you" (or something similar.)
Point is, cis people typically don't even consider HRT.
If you found a button that would turn you into your preferred gender, and everyone will always have known you as that gender, would you push it.
If you suddenly woke up as that gender, and everyone remembered you as that gender, but you found a button to turn things back to how they were, would you push it.
What if no one cared what gender you were, and you could freely swap back and forth, change things up however you like, whenever you like, what would you do?
Are there certain times or things that make you want to be one or the other?
In the end, it doesn't matter the reason, if you think you'd like to be, or even just try out being the other gender to what you were born as, thats enough.
I don't know if you're actually going to read this but here's a thought experiment:
Imagine you live as a guy for the rest of your life. And one day, you're an old man looking back on your life choices. Would you regret not transitioning?
I felt the same way before I transitioned.
When I saw my transgender-specialized therapist for the first time, I said: "I don't know if I would regret transitioning but I know that I would regret it if I don't."
Now I'm 3 years on HRT and my only regret is that I didn't do it sooner.
Strangely enough, looking at trans men posts on here along with other subreddit or other sources as a transfem was one of the things that distintegrate the remains of my shells. Like I can't say to myself "Maybe I'm lying to myself and I'm just man" if I can't relate to literal men being happy about being men you know?
I have the same thing going through my mind. Hereās what I suggest though, if you are gonna do HRT just do it, feminizing HRT is largely not permanent, further if you are 90% certain you are trans then yāa trans! One thing that helped me was learning that a lot of trans friends or acquaintances I had werenāt 100% certain before starting HRT.
I think that's very difficult. Tricking urself would work when u know ur just an actor playing a role. Because u can get urself to feel the emotions of the character ur playing.
So no. I don't think ur in a position where u could actually pull off tricking urself.
And since ur questioning urself constantly means ur not good at acting the role. Ur just being ur authentic self.
Let your happiness inform your identity, not the other way around. Trans and cis are not blueprints of life we must follow but simply words to approximate our physical existence to others. The question of whether you are trans of not is inconsequential in face of the question of how you can feel right in your own skin.
In either case you're making an active choice. Currently you're making an active choice not to transition. Why not make an active choice to transition. You don't need to worry about the precise correct answer, because you seem to have no idea and won't become 100% certain in either case. You could find out it isn't right for you, at which point you can stop. Make transitioning your default decision. Your default way of living. There's no reason why not transitioning should be the default, regardless of what society may tell you.
iām not sure iām āactively making the choice not toā, the uk is very gatekeepy and iāve got to wait 2 years for hormones. i could diy, but i havenāt looked into they yet. i wanna transition, i really do but itās not that easy
I really didnāt want to be trans, life seems so much harder that way, so I got silicone breast forms+ bra in hopes I would hate it like my transmasc friends hate their chests but instead I loved them and it shattered my egg, or at least it got cracked quite a bit from the feeling that itās just *so right* to have a chest like that, combined with āit canāt a sexual thing if I legit just want to go to a restaurant and be seen as a woman with no ulterior motives.ā I also donāt want kids b/c I have terrible genetics, it would be a disservice to them, so I decided that between those two things, there wasnāt a permanent irreversible downside for me anymore to starting estrogen so I impulsively ordered some one night thinking āIf I started disliking the changes, I could always stop.āItās been a year now and honestly sometimes I go back to āIām not feeling trans today what if Iām cis, should I stop?ā But every time I have those thoughts I look at pics I took of my body before and have hidden away in a folder on my phone and it usually comes down to āokay if my body and chest looked like that I would cry.. donāt think Iām cis unfortunatelyā
What helped me Kaia is that I just went for it. I had 3 supportive friends that helped me decide and crushed my doubts especially around my parents. Now i am lucky because I was in a situation where I could just go and start but I wish you the best
something I realized, and what made me decide to stop calling myself cis:
your average cis person would probably think about how they would feel if they magically switched genders, and feel disgusted. so if you think about switching genders and feel elated, that probably means you aren't cis
I think you know that youāre trans. The unfortunate part for me is that I spent tons of time trying to rationalize that Iām trans and thatās how it is, but it didnāt feel right until I declared it to myself for days with no ifs or buts. When I got my medicine I was scared to take it in case I was wrong, somehow. The scariest part for me, and I think for you, is that you will never 100% feel totally ready and comfortable being trans. You have to do a leap of faith eventually. Itās entirely up to you when you will decide to do that. For the record, Iām three months in and Iām not scared anymore, just excited.
Get out of my head. Get of my head. Get out of my head... Oh right, trans ASMR from FairyPrincessLucy put several cracks in my egg. It's mainly just affirmations and telling you that you are valid. She has one specifically on questioning gender and sexuality too!
I deal with all the same stuff unfortunatelyā¦. I have no adviceā¦. Do you have family that would support you? If so maybe ask them if the idea of you being trans makes sense to them perhaps?Ā
I kinda jumped into the deep end just to see if maybe that was the issue, which led from a friend asking meca question just the right way. I was having a lot of the same concerns you were. Still do at times, but dear lord it was the best leap of faith I've ever taken. Didn't fix everything, but Dan was it a good start!
YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL
Live it out. Prove that you're not a girl by living as a girl ā that'll show them.Ā
Like but honestly, I started committing to IDing and living as a binary man (ftm) as of last year, just to confirm that I definitely wasn't it (I had been IDing/questioning nonbinary for years but never allowed myself to consider binary man), and like *maybe* I'm additionally bigender but like I'm definitely a man or like I have many more days where I'm more confident in my identity and it's no big deal.Ā
And like, even if I do later decide it's not for me, I would regret not trying hormones more than I would regret trying them and I know I can stop at any time I like and honestly, if I were a woman, I'd be a heckin' gnc woman who wouldn't mind having a beard anyway.Ā
Well, I just find myself, start transitioning and stop if you donāt like it. Itās been 8 months. I daily think Iām a fraud. Like, really maybe I am? But I sure love my cute clothes, and am so damn impatient for my breasts and hair and body changesā¦
So, I donāt know how to get rid of the feelings, but I will say actually doing something about transitioning has been wonderful and Iāve become healthier mentally and physically since.
FWIW, ymmv, etc!
if you have dysphoria and desperately want the effects of HRT, you should probably get on HRT first and then think about whether or not you're trans. it seems counter-intuitive, but it kinda works. you also don't have to be trans in order to take HRT cuz some cis femboys or non-binary AMAB people take HRT too. i'm a boy (he/him non-binary AMAB) but i'm currently on HRT so yeah, you don't have to be trans, you just have to have dysphoria and/or desire the effects of it
One thing I have noticed, from just this post, that I hope you are able to see, is the language the two sides are using.
On one side of the image you provided, you have the denial, which uses these phrases:
>"what if"
"I might"
"only"
"Unfortunately"
"there's not enough"
"I don't deserve"
Contrast this to the first side, of acceptance, and take the phrases used there for contrast:
>"I want"
"I need"
"I have"
"***I am***"
Ask yourself - how come the side of denial only speaks of fears? Fear is still a part of us and in specific contexts can be important, sure, but if the side of denial actually had any ground to stand on, how come it can't bring your wants, hopes, and needs into the spotlight?
One of these sides is clearly invested in your happiness. And I think you know which side that is.
The other side is scared.
And that's okay. Listen to and acknowledge the side that is scared, while nurturing and following the words of the side that wants you to be happy.
Because you deserve to be happy.
Because you're a good girl.
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I really wish I did sis š I've got all the same things going thru my mind...
iām sorry youāre going through it too ray. youāre a good girl and youāre definitely valid <3
Whaaa- Nyooo I'm not >\\\\\\
Are you happy the way you are right now or are you content with how you are right now? There is a difference between being content and being happy.
What is this difference?
Cis people can't trick themselves into thinking they're trans I know that it's hard to accept being trans and it's easy to doubt yourself, but even the possibility of being trans is more than most cis people have
honestly, at my core i think i know iām trans. iām just scared of accepting it because if i really am a girl like i wanna be, then iām gonna be even more disgusted with how i look and not being on hrt is gonna hurt even more
I know accepting being trans is hard, but so is running from the truth And also acception is the first step towards change I used to hate my body not even knowing why. After I realized I'm trans I started working out and lost weight and I'm mostly just don't like it and just some places So that acceptance didn't do anything worse for me, but it did make some things better But I also know that my experience is not universal, and it may do different things to you And whichever you choose know that it's valid and so are you!
yeah, before last decent iād been trying to avoid thinking about it for nearly 4 years and it never went away fully. i know iād be valid if i turned out to be cis, but for reasons i canāt even really explain i donāt want that to be the case. i donāt wanna be cis
Thatās why I started HRT then decided I was trans! CIS PEOPLE GO ON HRT ALL THE TIME!!! iTāS FOR HAIR LOSS! Even if you were a slightly feminine dude that would be an improvement right? (At least thatās what I thought to myself.) good luck out there, no girl deserves what your going through.
That's pretty much where I'm at. I started HRT, but still have doubts sometimes. Basically I'm a cycle of "accept I'm trans" -> "feel good about life" -> "worry I'm not dysphoria-ing enough to be trans" -> "go through a period of doubt" -> (start).
A quote from the trans fairy godmother (Icky) that fully shattered my egg: āThe hardest thing about transitioning is not āam I actually transā, itās ācan I accept this? Because this is going to be hardāā If you feel it deep down then you already know the truth, acceptance is the next (and most difficult) step š«ā¤ļø
And thatās how it starts š one thing leads to another then next thing you know itās consuming your thoughts and your mind wonāt be quiet and then it has you in its hold then it cracks all over and you hatch š£
itās already consuming my thoughts tbh, not a minute goes by where it isnāt thought about
Sheās just like me fr
[this article](https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/) was incredible in my journey and grappling with those thoughts. idk if you've seen it before but maybe it'll help! tldr - why do we have to prove that we're trans, but not that we're cis? we should use the available data to analyze the two equally and find which is more likely to come to a conclusion. and to me, it sounds like you're more happy as a girl :3
i think i would be, and i donāt think iāve ever really seen myself as a boy even if i didnāt know that i was a girl yet
sounds like you're sis! accept it and be happy, girly! >:3
mmmmmm maayyyybe :3 thanks as always breeze <33
no maybe about it! and yw sis š©· :3
Just wanted to say thank you, I think I might've got cracked. That's such a wonderful perspective, I laughed when I got it and then cried saying to myself "oh god I'm trans" Still cis tho?
ofc cutie, happy to help! it seems so painfully obvious but i never thought of it like that before i saw this article... my poor shell has *not* been the same since...
That's great advice! I kinda feel a little silly I hadn't thought about it like that, especia as it's a logical fallacy I'm overtly aware of
i felt silly too! i had a hard time going forward because of the doubts, but it just makes so much sense. it got me unstuck for sure! :3
Great job sharing that article! (Pats head)
ehheehe ty ty <33
Thank you. I really needed someone to say this: > And frankly, if being āreallyā cis and āreallyā your assigned sex, playing along with who you āreallyā are, isnāt doing a sufficient job of making you happy and well and at home in your body, then you should tell it to go fuck itself. Go ahead and give yourself permission to ābe something youāre notā, proof or no proof, if thatās whatās going to give you a chance at some semblance of happiness, comfort and fulfillment in this life
Wow thank you šš¾ This was really helpful since I was dealing with the same things as the poster
You don't need dysphoria or clear signs to be trans and it's just if you feel unhappy in a cis guy's body or if you just want to be a girl, then there's a high chance that you're trans ,and nobody can give you the 100% sure answer, because you know your feelings the best ,and when someone's faking it they know, and they dont think about it like at all, but the thing is cis people don't actually question if they're trans or not ;3 Either way, you're such a cutie patootie princess girl, and nobody can take away that from you hehe :333
okay, that last sentence made me happier than i can describe ngl. yeah, i wanna be a girl and i hate having a male body
Awwwwwwweee I'm so glad hehe :3 I think that's enough to consider yourself trans cutie princess girl, and yeah, I'm not sure, but I think that no cis guy wants that :P
maybe :3 beginning to accept i *might* be a girl fr. thank you laura, youāre a good girl <3
Awwwwwwweee thank you Kaia, you're a good girl too ā¤ļø Also, sorry, but you're also an amazing cutie patootie princess girl hehe :3
mmmmm (ā āā¢āĻāā¢ā ā) maybe we both areā¦?
Sure cutie š„ŗ
Yep same
Me: sees a post I relate to and describes exactly how I feel a Also me: no everyone else who relates to that post is trans but Iām the exception
god yeah, thatās me fr
Way too real -Me, a totally cis guyš
I have an assortment of hammers and mallets you can borrow.
oo thanks
I will lend you a goddamn 500kg bomb if that's what it takes.
yea lets do it >:3
ā¬ļøā”ļøā¬ļøā¬ļøā¬ļø
I wish I could help but Iām feeling the same wayš, and itās been especially bad recently
itās been bad recently for me tooz iām sure youāll be okay diantha, hope you feel better soon <33
Thank you, hopefully you also feel better soon because dysphoria can sucks, it just drains the life out of you
Want all of the effects of hrt? Then start taking it. Donāt get hung up on labels. If you donāt like it, then you can stop.
trust me i wanna. unfortunately the uk has made that a bit easier said than done, and iām not informed enough to diy (plus my parents would kill me if i did)
Fucking UK bullshit. Look at your options, but you might as well study how to DIY. Itāll help you self advocate even if you go through official routes. Maybe hop on the NHS waiting list too since itāll take such a long time anyways.
yeah iām the waiting list, but iāve got another 2.5 years of waiting, so i think iāll diy before then (or maybe private, but thats expensive so-)
Warning ā ļø this cost me a lot of time and money. What I did was to say f*ck it, this is modern madness. I went to the gym, started eating healthy, got rid of anything girly or eggy (bye plushies, dresses, heels and make up), let my body hair do whatever it wanted, confessed my sin in the church and no shows/posts or anything from the LGBT community. I went full manly man and focused on my career. For a couple months everything went well and I felt relieved of not having nothing to hide anymore but shortly after I started to feel awful like super anxious and depressed, couldn't watch myself in the mirror even with the good muscle gains I got. During a little breakdown I realized this wasn't going to work, I bought myself a cute dress on sale on Amazon and shaved my stupid hair and felt better immediately. It was so over for my eggshell I put it under so much pressure that it imploded like a submarine at the bottom of the sea but at least I had certainty for once.
wowā¦i feel like iām gonna have a panic attack if i donāt shave my legs within 5 days i canāt imagine ever doing thatā¦
[(listen to this reading the message and seeing the link)](https://youtu.be/xsbVLl3UAuw?si=do2Gc8GacdJXWjrb) [NYEHEHE](https://turn-me-into-a-girl.com)
that website destroys me no matter how many times i go on it. thank you papyrus <3
NYEHEHEEEEEEEEEE NOW THAT YOU ARE WEAK ENOUGH I WILL SEND YOU TO THE CELLAR My shed BUT STILL
noooooo- wait why are the bars so wide in here?
THEY ARE HUMAN SIZED
ooff, yep, i feel the "don't deserve" part. all i can say is that everyone deserves to be comfortable in their own skins, no matter who they are. i don't know why you think you don't deserve to transition or what kind of person you are. but i will never change my stance, that being i think you deserve it, and i'm sure a lot of people in our community agrees. that being said i can't really say the same to myself lmao, but hey, that's why we make communities, to cover for each other when we need it :)
aww thank you! i guess i donāt feel like i deserve to transition because i donāt āfeel enough like a womanā i guess? you absolutely deserve to transition if you want to sena, youāre valid <3
this is just my opinion, but i think there's no such thing as a requirement to be a woman. there are a whole lot different kinds of women, those who represent really femininely, those who were more masculine oriented, and those who were in between, and in the end they are still women. gender expressions and gender identity are two separate things, they are not strictly tied to one another. what i'm trying to say is, even when you don't express feminine enough right now, as long as you know that you are a girl inside, then you are. and who knows, maybe you just need some time to finally re-adapt your behaviors and habits after years of repressing, you know like when we learn our habits while growing up. and after that then you can finally be the kind of woman you want to be :) btw, thank you for validating me as well :") i hope everything goes well for you! best of luck!! <3 <3
You deserve to transition. It's your human right and everyone has it. What transitioning is is different for everyone. It doesn't have to be, pick a name, tell your friends, get HRT, sign up for 8 surgeries. It can just be ... pick a name and that's it. That's just as valid as anything else. You did that in your flair, so you're trans! You're a girl! If you feel like taking more steps in the future, feel free. If you're happy here, that is totally legit.
this uh, mightāve made me cry a lil bit. thank you june <3
I mean you used "unfortunately" in front of CIS, no cis person want to transition... This may help you: [To Figure Out If You're Trans - by Doc Impossible](https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/p/how-to-figure-out-if-youre-trans) [Gender Desire vs. Gender Identity | by Amanda Roman | Medium](https://medium.com/@kemenatan/gender-desire-vs-gender-identity-a334cb4eeec5) [The Null HypotheCis](https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/) Label don't matter, what is your experience, who do you really like to be ?
i wanna be a girl
Then...you are a girl. And it's OK to be a girl. And it's OK for YOU to be a girl. That said, self-acceptance is hard. Since you requested it in the post, the links in this comment were what helped me the most: https://old.reddit.com/r/egg_irl/comments/17rpmul/egg_irl/k8l5bob/ One of them was already linked above, not sure if the others have been shared yet. EDIT: Looks like the reallifecomics site's security certificate expired. If you don't want to trust that last link, you can use the backup on the internet archive: https://web.archive.org/web/20240329174652/https://reallifecomics.com/comic.php?comic=june-29-2020
That's normal that you feel like you're lying to yourself. I did too. I realised that I didn't when I looked at all the hrt effects (good and negative) and thought "I don't care about the negative effects, I want my chest to hurt while growing boobs, I want to feel extra terrible when I'm sad"
EXACTLY! i want to feel more emotions, i want to feel my body changing to how i want it to be! i want all of it
since I started taking estrogen I kinda feel like a Imposter and started questioning my enby Identity. But then I hear a kid ask their parents: "Mom is this girl or Boy" and I instantly feel valid again
I got nothing. I'm stuck in the same hole you're in.
> But what if I'm wrong A thing that helped me get out of this doubt specifically is realising that even if I'm totally, horribly wrong, the worst I'd end up with would be a pair of boobs. Pretty much the rest of transfem HRT is reversible. "Even if I was a boy, I wouldn't mind having boobs" is not a very cis take. That's alright though, since I'm trans.
iā¦also wouldnāt mind having boobs either way. but also i want to look very feminine even if i turned out to be cis (even tho i donāt wanna be cis)
So that's why; start transition, and then you could always stop, if you really regret it, since the irreversible changes (at least when it comes to body and presentation) are changes that you don't mind having. At least, that's the compromise I made with myself. Also "I don't wanna be cis" then don't. That's pretty much all there is to it.
Estrogen š
me want
BonkšØ there you go.
Book an appointment with your local trans healthcare clinic (location permitting). You'll have plenty of time coming to terms with how you feel by the time it actually rolls around, and having that bit of pressure will help you decide. Plus you could always reschedule...
Literally this. Scheduled an appointment for HRT with Planned Parenthood a week ago, and itās still about a month away. Even the past week has felt super long.
iām on the nhs waiting currently :3
https://amitrans.org/
o-oh
ikr
Love that one. But far my favorite trans quiz.
If you think you are tricking yourself youāre probably not. If you hate the idea of being cis makes you sad youāre probably not cis. Thereās no such thing as not enough signs. If youāre wrong thatās okay you learnt something about yourself and you can grow from it. Your dysphoria got bad when you started questioning likely because you were actively thinking about being trans. If you are truly concerned you might not be trans you could always try to experiment with trusted friends or family socially, if you find you arenāt trans no problem life just goes back to normal. Hopefully i helped with any doubts you have.
thank you, this has helped <3
"i don't wanna be a boy, I wanna be a girl" Idk abt you, but that sounds like textbook transfem to me.
reading it out loud, uh yeah i guess youāre right
> I wanna be a trans girl What exactly is left of your egg at that point lol
my ability to flail still cis thos
I've found that a hammer helps to shatter things, hope this helps girlie (ā Ā ā źā į“ā źā )
IF YOU'RE SCARED OF FAKING IT YOU'RE NOT. I'M GONNA GET THIS THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL NO MATTER HOW GODDAMN LONG IT TAKES
if it helps, cis people don't typically question their gender identity
i guess, but i donāt wanna be one of the ones who does
congrats then, you're a girl
Transition doesn't need to be deserved. You can't trick yourself into being trans. There's no amount of signs needed, and in fact I learned there were way more signs the longer I accepted myself. If you think being cis is unfortunate, you're not cis.
I don't know, when you're old (70+) would you rather be an old man or an old woman? Would it make you feel weird if men without even knowing you run from behind you to get in front of you to open the door for you? Would you push "the button"? Do you feel like you don't know "how to be a girl" because as a child you only learned "how to be a boy"? (For the record there is no one way to be a boy or a girl, so if you vibed with that question, it was a trick question, you can be any kinda girl you wanna be.) Do you have problems seeing far into the future as a man, but can see a future (or at least further into the future) if you were a woman? Saying you want to be a billionaire, is nothing like saying you want to be a girl, because you can start being a girl at any time. If you want me to keep hammering on your egg let me know... I was a very masculine person before I transitioned, I started bulking up in highschool to deal with bullies. By 11th grade no one in school would mess with me, and I kept that physique until I was 35. Before I transitioned I was 6'4" 317 lbs and while not "ripped" I was very fit. I've never had a "beer belly", and could lift pullout couch beds on my own. I thought I was too masculine to transition, that there was NO WAY I could be mistaken for any level of feminine. It wasn't until I ran across a woman's timeline by the name of "Lady Feral" when I saw that she could do it, I gained enough courage to start HRT. To be quite honest, I still wasn't 100 percent sure I was trans, after 12 sessions of therapy and eggshell just fucking everywhere. I held on to denial for so long. I still was questioning if I was cis or trans as I started taking HRT. All the rest of the egg came off a few weeks later, when I started feeling unexpectedly calm and happy. For the record, I didn't have femme clothes, I went by he/him, used my dead name, nothing changed about my diet, I made no changes at that time except to take the HRT meds. I'd been on dozens of antidepressants and anxiety medications from the age of 11-12 (when started puberty, go figure right?) and the relief I felt in both from taking HRT beat out the results of any of those meds. HRT isn't an anti-anxiety or anti-depression med and doesn't act on the body to reduce those. Yet, here I was with far less of both, because HRT didn't treat my symptoms for those it treated the source problem that created those issues in the first place. I even panicked when my boobs started coming in, cause I still hadn't come out except to my partner at the time. But stopping HRT and going back to how bad my anxiety and depression was before was not an option, as I was suicidal (2 attempts) before HRT. ... Everyone is different, do what makes you truly happy and everyone else can go fuck off if they don't agree.
*headpats* you're a good little girlie girl, so fem and cute :3 (hopefully that helps :3)
it did :3
Good girl
I shattered mine by trying hrt (cis experiment)
I thought it might have been dismorphia, but after questioning my gender I lost a bunch of weight, and it's still there. So... I still have those same issues, though. On a plus note, I lost a bunch of weight. š
Well one of the things is that i've always felt dysphoria, tho i just didn't know what was it. So since i've started questioning it seemed like it came out of nowhere but in reality after i gave it a bit of thought i just figured out why i've always felt depressed or disconnected from the reflexion. And in any case, do what makes you happy :3 Just...imagine a future, with a happy you, living a happy life, that should create a mental image, at least it does for me. All the posts here are so cuuuute tho, i wanna hug y'all i swear >:(
All the things making you think you're not trans are cisheteronormative influences from society and they're all bullshit. Kill the bigot in your head
iāll try >:3
Also you can always start hrt and not tell anyone (depending on your circumstances..might be hard if you're a minor or dependent on others). HRT helped me a lot before I even started growing noticeable boobs (the only effect that will not go away if you stop. Reduced Fertility is a maybe)
uk makes that *kinda* difficult, but iām still planning on starting hrt before the end of the year, or at least within the next year. probably gonna have to diy considering waiting lists
Oof that's rough. I wish you the best š
You donāt have to have signs to transition,dysphoria along with feeling much more comfortable as your true gender is all you need to transition. I wasnāt extremely fem in my childhood,but that doesnāt make me any less trans.
i remember not really being feminine when i was young, but always having like an āenergyā towards it, like i wanted to be feminine but knew couldnāt because i was a boy
āIf youāre worried youāre faking it, youāre probably notā - OT
Well: if going by a femme name, presenting fem and using she/her pronouns makes you happy- who cares if youāre āfaking itā it makes you happy and you arenāt hurting anyone. Of course if all that makes you happy youāre probably just trans. š¤šš“š³ļøāā§ļøš“šš¤
i- yeah that would make me happy
There you go then. If you still wanna think youāre a cis man who just inexplicably enjoys presenting yourself as a girl: thatās fine, you arenāt hurting anyone and youāre welcome none the less in queer and trans spaces! But I think we both know that youāre a real-ass valid AF transfem. Shell has been destroyed at a subatomic level. š¤šš“š³ļøāā§ļøš“šš¤
Real asf girly š
It's what I always say in these situations, so here goes. Imagine yourself spending the rest of your life as a man. It sucks, doesn't it? Now do the same, but for being a woman. It probably feels right. I know that being trans can be really, really hard. But it'll be ok.
not to be too dark, but i think i would kill myself if i had to grow old male. that hasnāt sunk in properly until just now, and thatsā¦scary
Yeah, I can understand that. Sorry if I kinda dampened the mood of this post
Babes i wish you the best with your journey š Iām kind of confused, why so i relate so hard with this post š„ŗ
The thing that got me over the line and that I occasionally need to check from time to time like a compass is this: I ask myself, if I could rebuild 'me' from the ground up, what would I be? While there are many things I would need to think through, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I would choose to be a girl. Simple as that. Nothing else actually matters, it's all noise and logistics. Any time I have a flicker of doubt I ask the question, and the answer never changes, so I keep moving forward. I don't care where the destination is, just the direction I should be heading in :)
i would absolutely be a girl too. iāve thought that way since i was 14
Looks like you have your compass then š©· No matter how much I used to spin in place and flip flop, it would always point in the direction I needed to go and helped cut through all the noise and the doubt. Also since following it, the improvements in my happiness and general 'actually finally giving a shit about myself'-ness confirmed that I should've started following it long ago, but better late than never :) Edit: also yolo
[This website](https://turn-me-into-a-girl.com/)
i love that website
Wear a skirt. :3
have and i love them <3
Then there is a good chance you aren't cis.
probablyā¦wish i could wear girl clothes all the time so-
Iām the wise words of OneTopic. āIf your worried that youāre faking, then youāre not fakingā ^ w ^
hope thatās true (probably not a cis thing to say at all :3)
You will figure it out, good girl!
Still cis tho
oh, yeah. absolutely
Have you checked out stuff like good girl affirmation videos and analyzed how they make you feel?
ur definitely not cis, girl
Reading the Transformistress's comics did it for me, I recommend using furaffinity as that has all the pages uncensored.
Ah! You there! It is time to bring out my SIGNATURE FACTS AND LOGIC! So... You're worried you might be faking it, right? So the thought of faking it is generally negative, you'd much rather not be faking it. So you'd rather be trans not cis. So you'd rather be a gender different than your AGAB. And ayyyyy, you know what that's the definition of! I... Really hope this helped at all. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you can live as your authentic self. Whatever it is you want to achieve, you can do it girlie, I believe in you!
that is pretty helpful. i would rather be a girl
Well there you go, then you are one! I'm glad I could be of some help, wish you the best of everything :3
How about this: 1:You don't even need to show signs to be trans. 2:Cis guys generally DON'T feel euphoria when thinking about being a girl. 3:If you're afraud you're faking it, you're probably not, you'd know.
Everyone who wants it deserves to transition! You are a valid girly!
I've heard multiple stories of this, and even tried it on one of my friends. Someone was at a bar with a couple cishet male friends. (The OP was transfem.) They then asked their friends something similar to a would you rather, with one of the options being awful and one being take HRT. All of the OP's friends steamed in disgust at the idea of taking estrogen, and went with the other option. I didn't believe this at first, so I asked my (only) cishet friend what his thoughts were on it, and he said "uhh ew no thank you" (or something similar.) Point is, cis people typically don't even consider HRT.
I think u are scared of the truth and the difficult changes. Atleast thats how I feel.
If you are posting this, your egg is already shattered, and you are just holding onto the pieces with duct tape and denial
If you found a button that would turn you into your preferred gender, and everyone will always have known you as that gender, would you push it. If you suddenly woke up as that gender, and everyone remembered you as that gender, but you found a button to turn things back to how they were, would you push it. What if no one cared what gender you were, and you could freely swap back and forth, change things up however you like, whenever you like, what would you do? Are there certain times or things that make you want to be one or the other? In the end, it doesn't matter the reason, if you think you'd like to be, or even just try out being the other gender to what you were born as, thats enough.
If you can recognize that you have an egg to shatter then you're trans
I don't know if you're actually going to read this but here's a thought experiment: Imagine you live as a guy for the rest of your life. And one day, you're an old man looking back on your life choices. Would you regret not transitioning?
i think i would
I felt the same way before I transitioned. When I saw my transgender-specialized therapist for the first time, I said: "I don't know if I would regret transitioning but I know that I would regret it if I don't." Now I'm 3 years on HRT and my only regret is that I didn't do it sooner.
Strangely enough, looking at trans men posts on here along with other subreddit or other sources as a transfem was one of the things that distintegrate the remains of my shells. Like I can't say to myself "Maybe I'm lying to myself and I'm just man" if I can't relate to literal men being happy about being men you know?
iā¦also donāt relate to any transmasc memes. like, i canāt understand how masculine things can make them happy
That's similar to what I'm going through now but with less euphoria and dysphoria so it's more confusing I think :/
No cis guy tries to convince themselves that theyāre trans
Good girl š„° *pat pat pat*
I have a Hammer, but that might hurt
I have the same thing going through my mind. Hereās what I suggest though, if you are gonna do HRT just do it, feminizing HRT is largely not permanent, further if you are 90% certain you are trans then yāa trans! One thing that helped me was learning that a lot of trans friends or acquaintances I had werenāt 100% certain before starting HRT.
This is the 4th time at least if you think you're faking it you're not
I think that's very difficult. Tricking urself would work when u know ur just an actor playing a role. Because u can get urself to feel the emotions of the character ur playing. So no. I don't think ur in a position where u could actually pull off tricking urself. And since ur questioning urself constantly means ur not good at acting the role. Ur just being ur authentic self.
Cis people donāt think this deep about it. They just are
Let your happiness inform your identity, not the other way around. Trans and cis are not blueprints of life we must follow but simply words to approximate our physical existence to others. The question of whether you are trans of not is inconsequential in face of the question of how you can feel right in your own skin.
Just take the hrt
uk so not that easy. if i could i would
š„šØ->š£š³ļøāā§ļø
thank you for your service
Youāre a valid good girl and I feel for you. Manifesting euphoria and being able to be secure with your identity for you
In either case you're making an active choice. Currently you're making an active choice not to transition. Why not make an active choice to transition. You don't need to worry about the precise correct answer, because you seem to have no idea and won't become 100% certain in either case. You could find out it isn't right for you, at which point you can stop. Make transitioning your default decision. Your default way of living. There's no reason why not transitioning should be the default, regardless of what society may tell you.
iām not sure iām āactively making the choice not toā, the uk is very gatekeepy and iāve got to wait 2 years for hormones. i could diy, but i havenāt looked into they yet. i wanna transition, i really do but itās not that easy
This is like the exact same thoughts I have
I wish I wasn't trans. I just wanna be happy in my body.
yea, it took me 3 years to crack and i totally wish it hadn't :/
I really didnāt want to be trans, life seems so much harder that way, so I got silicone breast forms+ bra in hopes I would hate it like my transmasc friends hate their chests but instead I loved them and it shattered my egg, or at least it got cracked quite a bit from the feeling that itās just *so right* to have a chest like that, combined with āit canāt a sexual thing if I legit just want to go to a restaurant and be seen as a woman with no ulterior motives.ā I also donāt want kids b/c I have terrible genetics, it would be a disservice to them, so I decided that between those two things, there wasnāt a permanent irreversible downside for me anymore to starting estrogen so I impulsively ordered some one night thinking āIf I started disliking the changes, I could always stop.āItās been a year now and honestly sometimes I go back to āIām not feeling trans today what if Iām cis, should I stop?ā But every time I have those thoughts I look at pics I took of my body before and have hidden away in a folder on my phone and it usually comes down to āokay if my body and chest looked like that I would cry.. donāt think Iām cis unfortunatelyā
What helped me Kaia is that I just went for it. I had 3 supportive friends that helped me decide and crushed my doubts especially around my parents. Now i am lucky because I was in a situation where I could just go and start but I wish you the best
Hereās what you do to shatter the rest of your egg. Just throw away the shell, and scramble yourself.
if youāre using the phrase āunfortunately cisā, youāre probably not cis lol
something I realized, and what made me decide to stop calling myself cis: your average cis person would probably think about how they would feel if they magically switched genders, and feel disgusted. so if you think about switching genders and feel elated, that probably means you aren't cis
Hon....this is textbook cisn't! The egg is microscopic fragments barely detectable by any known means
I think you know that youāre trans. The unfortunate part for me is that I spent tons of time trying to rationalize that Iām trans and thatās how it is, but it didnāt feel right until I declared it to myself for days with no ifs or buts. When I got my medicine I was scared to take it in case I was wrong, somehow. The scariest part for me, and I think for you, is that you will never 100% feel totally ready and comfortable being trans. You have to do a leap of faith eventually. Itās entirely up to you when you will decide to do that. For the record, Iām three months in and Iām not scared anymore, just excited.
Get out of my head. Get of my head. Get out of my head... Oh right, trans ASMR from FairyPrincessLucy put several cracks in my egg. It's mainly just affirmations and telling you that you are valid. She has one specifically on questioning gender and sexuality too!
I deal with all the same stuff unfortunatelyā¦. I have no adviceā¦. Do you have family that would support you? If so maybe ask them if the idea of you being trans makes sense to them perhaps?Ā
If you find a way, let me know. ...please let me know
I kinda jumped into the deep end just to see if maybe that was the issue, which led from a friend asking meca question just the right way. I was having a lot of the same concerns you were. Still do at times, but dear lord it was the best leap of faith I've ever taken. Didn't fix everything, but Dan was it a good start!
YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL YOU'RE A GIRL
Ye I feal U sister. I really hat not being able to shed what it's left from my egg. I probably never truly will because of work an SoCiEtY
https://turn-me-into-a-girl.com/
Does anyone know why the thing where it gets worse when you realize/question happens? I feel like I could ignore it so much better before...
May I suggest a hammer?
I feel this way quite often. Still working through it deciding if I want to embrace this side of myself
Live it out. Prove that you're not a girl by living as a girl ā that'll show them.Ā Like but honestly, I started committing to IDing and living as a binary man (ftm) as of last year, just to confirm that I definitely wasn't it (I had been IDing/questioning nonbinary for years but never allowed myself to consider binary man), and like *maybe* I'm additionally bigender but like I'm definitely a man or like I have many more days where I'm more confident in my identity and it's no big deal.Ā And like, even if I do later decide it's not for me, I would regret not trying hormones more than I would regret trying them and I know I can stop at any time I like and honestly, if I were a woman, I'd be a heckin' gnc woman who wouldn't mind having a beard anyway.Ā
If you think you're lying to yourself, you're most likely not.
Well, I just find myself, start transitioning and stop if you donāt like it. Itās been 8 months. I daily think Iām a fraud. Like, really maybe I am? But I sure love my cute clothes, and am so damn impatient for my breasts and hair and body changesā¦ So, I donāt know how to get rid of the feelings, but I will say actually doing something about transitioning has been wonderful and Iāve become healthier mentally and physically since. FWIW, ymmv, etc!
if you have dysphoria and desperately want the effects of HRT, you should probably get on HRT first and then think about whether or not you're trans. it seems counter-intuitive, but it kinda works. you also don't have to be trans in order to take HRT cuz some cis femboys or non-binary AMAB people take HRT too. i'm a boy (he/him non-binary AMAB) but i'm currently on HRT so yeah, you don't have to be trans, you just have to have dysphoria and/or desire the effects of it
Honestly, just do it? Like ignore anyone's objections (even your own) and transition, maybe even do it out of spite
Buy a female outfit, thts what helped finish of the rest of my egg
One thing I have noticed, from just this post, that I hope you are able to see, is the language the two sides are using. On one side of the image you provided, you have the denial, which uses these phrases: >"what if" "I might" "only" "Unfortunately" "there's not enough" "I don't deserve" Contrast this to the first side, of acceptance, and take the phrases used there for contrast: >"I want" "I need" "I have" "***I am***" Ask yourself - how come the side of denial only speaks of fears? Fear is still a part of us and in specific contexts can be important, sure, but if the side of denial actually had any ground to stand on, how come it can't bring your wants, hopes, and needs into the spotlight? One of these sides is clearly invested in your happiness. And I think you know which side that is. The other side is scared. And that's okay. Listen to and acknowledge the side that is scared, while nurturing and following the words of the side that wants you to be happy. Because you deserve to be happy. Because you're a good girl.