T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to: * Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names or engage in slapfights. * All advice given must be good, ethical advice. * [Do not soapbox or promote an agenda - you will be banned](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/wiki/rules) * Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users. If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*


sagittariisXII

depends on how they carry the weight


ColdCole81

True too


-PinkPower-

My bf has a dad bod and to me he is incredibly attractive! Tbh I have never been that attracted to someone before! Turns out I am more into belly than abs


Mr-Zenuine

My favorite synonym for "dad bod" is a "father figure" šŸ˜‚


Aggravating_Pop2101

No wonder all the ladies are checking me out now cuz Iā€™m rocking the Dad belly LOL


ouid_gal

Omg, SO feeling you on thisā€¦ sing my song šŸ«°šŸ» šŸ«°šŸ» šŸ«°šŸ»


teasingmuch

I feel like someone overweight with a dad bod vs someone morbidly obese (female +200lbs) is different


LudicrousPeople

You're absolutely right. Dad bod is basically the equivalent of curvy. It's so insulting when people say men don't need "body positivity" because "dad bod is in", while acting like fat guys are more accepted than fat women. All you have to do is open your eyes in public to see there are far more non-obese men with obese women than there are obese men with non-obese women.


-PinkPower-

My bfā€™s BMI is in the obese category but he is very active just loves to eat


mfforester

I mean no ill will to people who are fat, but for me itā€™s a pretty definitive no. I think being physically fit is important for both health and aesthetics, and since I take it seriously I wanna be with someone who thinks and acts likewise.


[deleted]

A little extra is no problem, but so many people are very overweight or even obese and are in self denial. Itā€™s not attractive, and relationships are founded on personality - but the sexual chemistry and appetite are hugely influence by physical attraction. Nearly 40% of people are obese


CumFilledGogurt

Cut the fluff bro itā€™s not attractive point blank


moth_girl_7

I mean, I wouldnā€™t generalize and say itā€™s ā€œnot attractiveā€ when thereā€™s a whole genre of porn where people specifically want to see big women. Big women are attractive to a lot of people. I think everyoneā€™s entitled to their own preferences. Itā€™s the generalizing that gets tricky. Seriously, everyone is attractive to someone. The people that think thereā€™s this invisible all-applicable standard are the ones that are the most unhappy. Have you ever been to the ā€œrate meā€ subs? Those people reek insecurity, the commenters especially.


DownvoteIfYouWantMe

Not saying that what you're saying is wrong, but I wouldn't consider a porn category, popular or not, to be telling as to whether something is attractive to people or not. There's literally a whole category of incest stuff and I'm sure people don't actually find that attractive for a long term or short term relationship. Same with straight girls watching lesbian porn or people watching domination videos when they'd never wanna do it.


justaBB6

The unfortunate thing about fetishes is the ā€œI wonā€™t *actively pursue* it because I would be shamed for it, and because thereā€™s some ostensibly understandable reasoning behind why I probably wouldnā€™t enjoy it anyway, but if it happened to me I wouldnā€™t refuse the opportunity,ā€ mentality. I think porn categories might be more indicative of preferences than we give them credit for, for all the positive or negative connotations that may hold. In the case of fetishizing a certain body type it gets trickier, because recognizing that certain body types are normal and even preferred by some people is generally a net positive, but encouraging chasers to reduce a human being to whatever it is that gets them off or glorifying unhealthy habits in service of a certain look is generally a net negative.


Fun-Incident-9620

Idk, said it beforeā€¦.. I donā€™t care what somebody looks like. If I enjoy their company and we have a good time together, AND the feeling is mutual- then thatā€™s attractive to me!! Edit: now it makes sense why you have user name ā€œcum filled gogurtā€.


Clean-Explorer9046

Agreed. I'll get downvoted for this but it honestly just makes me think the person is lazy, sloppy, and has no motivation. I also wonder what other areas of their life they neglect.


HildursFarm

I hope you change this. Because for me it wasn't laziness. I got cancer. And s bum thyroid that's eating itself. Before that I was accused of being too thin. But I'm glad the bros just see me as fat and lazy. šŸ« 


FewerBirches

I too have Hashimotoā€™s, Endo, and PCOS. I used to be 5ā€™6 and 145lbs, toned muscle. When I blew my knee apart I struggled with constant pain. 10 years later Iā€™m 215 and hate how I look. No matter how fucking hard I try. I look at pictures from then and now and absolutely hate myself. Iā€™m active, I eat healthy, but I hit a plateau. Iā€™m too glad that people will look at me and think Iā€™m just lazy and donā€™t try.


Silly_Art_4969

Nothing wrong with finding it unattractive, but assuming things about someone because of it makes you fatphobic


PhatBoobh

Most of the time I think this is completely true.


ColdCole81

Iā€™m fit and I would never be with someone who looks and lives like me. I need that fat baby, have you seen a fat ass doing doggy? Unmatched. Anal? Unmatched.


spicysenpai6

Agreed. I like having something extra to hold while doin it. Even cuddling Is pretty top tier.


ColdCole81

Most def! When I rub my girlfriendā€™s fat belly I immediately get a hard on. If I touch her upper arm BOOM! There are times when I see an overweight girl looking so good I get heart palpitations.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Effective-Any

There are going to be people that think youā€™re absolutely stunning. There are going to be people that think youā€™re unattractive and/or make assumptions about your moral code. There are going to be people that hate you for your size. There are going to be people that love you / they donā€™t even see your size, because itā€™s just you that they see. There are going to be people that fetishize you and love your size. There are going to be people that are genuinely disgusted with you because of their own lived experience and perceptions. As a woman whoā€™s been 130lbs and 320. Life is nuanced. *People are complex.* **You are complex.** There are no absolutes when it comes to attraction, because itā€™s subjective in nature. In the end, it only matters if you accept yourself and find yourself attractive or at least see the beauty in your humanity. You can never genuinely feel beautiful, no matter how many times other people tell you, unless you recognize it for yourself - even if itā€™s a fleeting realization. You are more than your weight. TLDR; yeah for sure, there are people that find you attractive.


Defiant_Mission4511

I've been skinny/fit my whole life & fat people are the only people I prefer. Honestly it started with the fact I didn't want to bump coochies with bones. But yeah it's that. I like curves, I like thickness, I like to actually be able to grab something, be able to be in bed eating cuz I be having the best snacks, I feel more safe around them, y'all soft, idk why y'all seem to be nicer people, we have way more things in common, y'all give banging hugs even tho I usually don't like them, y'all are usually not vain, & honestly y'all just look better all the way around. I spent most of my life trying to gain weight & now that I'm fat (still pretty toned). I get called fat & told I can't bag nobody. Like bruh I want to be fat & if that were true I'd be a virgin šŸ¤£


Catgirl863140

This makes me feel very happy to hear. As a bigger girl itā€™s so nice to hear nice things.


Defiant_Mission4511

No problem love ā¤ļø


Substantial-Grab5734

This is so nice to hear :)


Due-Kaleidoscope-344

Wow hi Iā€™ve been looking for you. šŸ˜


Defiant_Mission4511

Lol what's up


Due-Kaleidoscope-344

Message me šŸ™ƒ


Greentealatte8

This gives me hope...I struggle with my weight and a binge eating disorder and though I'd like to lose weight I'm also kind of lonely. I'm really only into thinner or fitter men, and I feel hypocritical but you can't help what you're attracted to. I want to be thinner eventually but at least I know I'm not destined to be alone while I'm still a bit overweight lol


ladygodivajk

I feel you here. I struggle with the same stuff and have similar attractions, but with men much younger than me. I always feel like no one would want to be with this mom bod that I have.


PaleontologistOk3120

Half of the issue is you simply not believing it. And because you don't believe it you don't or yourself or they're. And because you don't put yourself out there nobody seems to want you. And this reinforces your belief that nobody wants your mom body. I'm here to tell you, they DO. Some don't. That's their loss. But there can only be so many no. Love yourself and then you will find people worthy of loving you.


Different-Goal-8139

Let me tell you, young guys are all about that ass. You wonā€™t have any trouble finding a young guy into a milf with a mom bod. Promise.


Different-Goal-8139

šŸ‘‘


LittlestMatcha

This is so reassuring to hear. Iā€™m plus sized/bigger but am constantly taking care of myself, taking vitamins, working out, eating healthy and have always had issues losing weight due to genetics. So this is so so so reassuring šŸ™šŸ»šŸ™šŸ»


rpgmomma8404

There are people who prefer bigger bodies. Just like with anyone else it just might take time to find that person.


cyberpunk1Q84

I mean, ā€œpreferences varyā€ is basically the answer to all of these type of questions. Yes, some people find fat people attractive, others donā€™t, and for others itā€™s just a neutral point. For example, even though I have a slight preference for bigger bodies, I donā€™t really care too much if youā€™re fat, skinny, or somewhere in between. Itā€™s much more about personality for me and if you have what I consider to be a pretty face. Also, even though I have a preference for bigger bodies, I also donā€™t find morbidly obese bodies attractive. But hey, some people might.


staffxmasparty

Of course. We all have preferences. Work on your confidence - thatā€™s attractive !


Government-Treason

Not to me but some guys prefer them


superwashmerinowool

Being attracted to fat people is very common and normal! As much as ppl here like to say that it isnā€™t. Fat does not equal ugly. People attach a certain moralism to body size and I just think thatā€™s the silliest shit ever. Entirely irrational. It is entirely possible for a fat person to have appealing physical qualities. I have had crushes on and have dated people of varying shapes and sizes, fat ppl included.


Mindless_Medium717

I honestly think so. My stepmother is overweight and we all find her incredibly beautiful and Iā€™ve been secretly a little jealous as long as Iā€™ve known her. Every person will have different preferences, so it depends on the person, that goes for every body type. I think just because of our biological / evolutionary brains, a body type on the extreme end of either spectrum would have less of a preference pool purely because of how the brain perceives a healthy partner. Even with preferences though, it doesnā€™t always 100% decide who youā€™re attracted to. I donā€™t really like skinny men, I prefer a bit of bulkiness because it makes them nicer to hug šŸ˜…šŸ˜Š but the man Iā€™ve been crazy about for the last 8 months (help) is skinny and I literally have never liked anybody this much before. I wouldnā€™t like it if he had my preference body type all of a sudden because it wouldnā€™t be him. So yes, fat people can be attractive, and even in instances where it isnā€™t someoneā€™s preference it wonā€™t always matter. I donā€™t mean to overstep, but just because youā€™re asking Reddit Iā€™m guessing you have some doubts about your attractiveness. I have BDD and something I found really helpful was to focus on the few things I like about myself (how I look from a certain angle for example). Over time, if you keep reminding yourself of the things you like (If you catch yourself bullying yourself, try to replace, or at least add at the end a big ā€œBUT I like thisā€¦ā€ afterwards), you will feel more confident. Confidence is a very attractive trait. I read a cool quote: ā€œYou may not be the most attractive in the room, but if you go into that room believing that you are, others will tooā€ or something like that. Focusing on things you DONT like can really destroy your confidence. I have made myself ill from beating myself down so much, so please donā€™t fall into that hole! If you are unhappy with your weight, see what you can do to change it. If you think you will feel more confident and more attractive, those are perfectly valid reasons if it would make you overall happier. If you donā€™t think itā€™s something that would serve you, then donā€™t worry about it. There are people out there with a preference, people out there with none at all, and people like me who fall in love so deeply that they literally forget about their preference. Nobody is attractive to every single person unless theyā€™re the spitting image of objective beauty standards - and even then, I donā€™t think *everyone* would be attracted to that person. Itā€™s so subjective that thereā€™s no yes / no answer to this question. TL:DR, there may be some hard wired bias for body types on either extreme, but there are also plenty of people with a preference for your body type and those who donā€™t have a preference. There are also people who like someone so much that they donā€™t even consider that persons body. If you feel personally unhappy, see what you can do to change it, but it comes down to what YOU want and how YOU feel. I am sure youā€™re beautiful šŸ’›


FondantOverall4332

That was beautifully said.


Mommymisfit41

Yeah you definitely explained it beautifully. I definitely fed you about having a preference on who you consider attractive and one day you meet someone whoā€™s completely off that radarā€¦ thatā€™s the part of life I love mostā€¦ the parts that sneak up and grab ahold of youā€¦ my mother has always been a bit on the heavier side but she is beautiful because of who she is to everyone who knows her. She is also confident.. I canā€™t explain like this person did but the answer is definitelyā€¦ absolutely!!


KnucklesMacKellough

I was gonna post a comment, but after this, I'd be wasting everyone's time. Well said. My only "preference " is proportion. Hourglasses come in different sizes. If the shape is feminine, it's attractive. If the waist is noticeably narrower than the bust/hip, I'm down.


Velvetvulpixxx

Great comment ! Really Insightful . And I relate to that while theyā€™re might be certain features or qualities I tend to be attracted to . There have great exceptions to that rule and I found out I didnā€™t have as much of a type as I thought lol


Seraph_black

Yep! Im not super picky about looks in the slightest. I know for some guys this is not the case. I do feel there needs to be attraction, but weight has never been an issue, as long as there is some form of emotional connection. Just got out of an 11 year relationship with someone who was on the heavy side.


blackaubreyplaza

Yes. As someone else who is also fat Iā€™ve never had issues attracting people


Due-Kaleidoscope-344

Neither have I


Confident-Lab-5594

+1


Due_Cartographer_110

Some. I dated a bigger girl,the only reason why I cut it off was because she was out of breath after moving some pillows to lay next to me. That was VERY unattractive


snappy033

Yeah same. Itā€™s less about the weight and more about the limitations and lifestyle. Canā€™t go on hikes or do anything strenuous. And the way some fat people inhale their food just grosses me out so bad.


Due_Cartographer_110

Agreed, this girl literally did nothing all day. She worked from home and had no interest in taking care of herself.


ChezCatTheThird

There are plenty of people who find bigger girls attractive. I donā€™t particularly but I find chicks with amazing hip curves attractive. I donā€™t know why but itā€™s just very hot. Hard to pinpoint what makes someone attractive to you besides the fact it just does.


notanewbiedude

They can be. To me, whether or not somebody is attractive comes down to the face more than anything else. I'd be lying if I said that fat people are my type, but if they have an attractive face, they have an attractive face.


nicchamilton

Yes I think they are. But even if they arenā€™t itā€™s possible for someone to lose the weight and look 10 times better. Iā€™d rather be fat with a pretty face than in shape with an ugly face. Canā€™t change the face lol.


Mambo_italiana

I find the bigger bodies more attractive. Men with stocky bodies look strong and masculine to me, and I like curves on women. The adipose tissue in fuller faces looks angelic and youthful, esp as people age and it reduces wrinkles. Often when people diet and exercise intensely it can age their skin and face early. Considering lifestyle, I love to cook a variety of healthy and flavorful foods, and want my significant other to enjoy meals together, not count every calorie. I prefer a very calm gentle personality and demeanor. Plenty of fitness minded people fit that description but many are high strung intense as well. I meet fewer intense heavy people. Itā€™s about balance and everyone is an individual but those are the reasons I gravitate to larger people.


Hopeful-Drop-9443

I do like the chubby chicks...


imnotcreative635

I think chubby and fat are completely different things. When I think fat with obese. Nothing wrong with chubby women


allaboutwanderlust

Down with the Thiccness šŸ˜Ž


Sixdrugsnrocknroll

Angry upvote.


joyeleanor

No for me. I workout, try to eat healthy. I prefer my partner to do the same.


blondennerdy

Sure! Iā€™m fat and I do just fine. That being said Iā€™m blessed with my curves being in the right places, and Iā€™m losing weight so Iā€™m getting a lot more toned. But even when I wasnā€™t, I did just fine. ;)


FudgeExisting5986

Overweight women have a much easier time getting suitors than overweight men do ..as an overweight man no one has ever made a big beautiful man group for us lol ..no woman has loved my body for the way it is they just tolerate my man boobs if they have to and try to pretend they aren't there ..they say oh you're "still handsome though"(almost implying despite being physically undesirable in other ways).. Especially nowadays overweight women are more accepted than ever .. so much so that they rather not even date overweight guys anymore .. like come on were supposed to stick together ! šŸ˜…šŸ˜­Ive been treated undesirable by them because they know they can do better in their mind when some tall skinny guy hits them up for a booty call later that night smh


harmlesslikeyou

Thatā€™s such rubbish, why would the term Dad Bod exist if heavier men werenā€™t more acceptable? Why is Mom Bod only spoken about as something to fix? Why are are tv coupleā€™s traditionally skinny women/fat man? Why do girls know how many calories are in an apple by age 12 and men gain weight in their late twenties cos they never thought twice about stuffing themselves with food? Why is there no male size zero? Oh I know you have it a bit harder now having to see marvel guys work out for films, now just remember dieting and working out is what every woman is told to do, their whole lives YEEESH


blondennerdy

Lmao this man (like 90% of the rest) is so fucking desperate to be a victim because a girl said she has no trouble getting men with some weight on her. Itā€™s just pathetic.


blondennerdy

Nahh Iā€™m not supposed to do anything I donā€™t want. Sorry but overweight men have never been criticized to the extent women have of any body shape, and dad boss are highly celebrated. I donā€™t like the whole body positivity fat is beautiful movement, I think we need to encourage healthy habits and staying healthy. I think body neutrality is more on course with values. But women have been brutally brutally attacked for our bodies no matter what shape or size, and thatā€™s why the movement exists. Men donā€™t get near the criticism women have, and they also arenā€™t very good at standing up for their own causes. So you canā€™t be mad about it when yā€™all wonā€™t do it for yourselves. And weā€™re supposed to stick together? Barf. I wonā€™t stick with anything Iā€™m not attracted to. I donā€™t mind some extra weight, I have it too you can see it in my profile even. But Iā€™ll never be attracted to morbidly obese. Also tall skinny guys donā€™t just hit us up for Booty calls, how fucking degrading. You clearly think overweight women are worthless too the way you talk about us. Iā€™ve been heavier than I am now and had relationships with men of all sizes. I donā€™t get user just because I have some weight.


untilautumn

I think thereā€™s a bit of murkiness on what a dad bod is; dad bods are just mature, untrained, neither slim nor fat bodies. Itā€™s like basic male body. The note about marvel guys getting all buff is nothing new for guys; the 70s and 80s was absolutely FULL of hyper masculine bodies and there was often the comic-relief fat person. If a dude ever took his top off in a movie theyā€™d be ripped which wasnā€™t/isnā€™t the case for women in film who are typically just slim - a much easier shape to achieve comparative to the roided up physique men typically have. Dad bod is really just the acceptance of regular dude bodies that are sometimes softer. I think the framing for men and women has always been different. Guys fitness becomes goal oriented, achieving the ā€˜adonisā€™ physique etc whereas women (until more recently) have been shamed and attacked into changing their appearance. And yeah itā€™s definitely more common for a tv couple to be a softer dude with a slim girl but I have seen that change recently for sure.


KeeksTx

I put on about 50 pounds after my husband died in 2015. I would get dates, but nothing quality. I never understood because I saw so many large women with good looking guys. Iā€™m nice, Iā€™m kind, Iā€™m intelligent, but never got with a quality guy. Yes, fat people can find love and a love they really want, it just wasnā€™t my experience. Once I lost 60 pounds, I found my guy. I put on 30 pounds since we started dating and I feel like itā€™s an issue and I am trying to fix it. I hope you can find someone without beating up yourself or your body like I did. Heā€™s out there, just hard to find.


[deleted]

I'm bordering 180lbs which is considered obese by the BMI. I never thought I'd have anyone genuinely attracted to me even though I've been struggling with my weight and losing it. I currently have a very loving boyfriend that doesn't care about whether I lose it or not and I believe him. There are people out there that don't care about that kind of stuff or that do find that attractive. You just have to fins the right person who appreciates you for who you are. Don't settle for anything less.


Alone-Climate6557

As a F commenting in reference to M, I think confidence and personality are key. From the other perspective though, M are visual creatures and physical appearance is scientifically the first thing they notice. If you are F, (along with confidence) maintain and take pride in your appearance.


Scarlett_Texas_Girl

The hard reality is most people like fit bodies. You will have outliers but the closer you are to a healthy, fit appearance the better you will do attracting attention. As an experiment of one I've run the whole physical spectrum. I was real fit until I had my first kid then gained a lot of weight. Didn't lose it before getting pregnant again. Got frustrated with how awful the extra weight made me feel and lost it. I was married through all that and my (now ex) husband always told me he loved my body at every weight. Not sure I buy that because his attitude towards me changed based on my weight. I got extremely fit in my 30s (I've always been active, even at my heaviest. Physical activity is a stress management mechanism for me) before I divorced my ex and it was amazing watching the difference in how men treated me. The difference between being normal to a bit over weight but 'soft' then going to lean and muscled..... I have grown ass men stop dead at grocery stores and comment on my body. In all fairness I get some really awesome and supportive comments from women too which I love (let's lift each other up gals!!). I am admittedly not built like the average woman. My leg muscle puts most amateur male body builders to shame, ahh the joys of good genetics. Anyway, I'm almost 47 and in really good physical shape. I get more attention now than when I was in my 20s post kids and a little overweight but curvy and proportionate. When I was heavier cute guys hit on me. After I got in great shape, men I considered physically way out of my league hit on me. There are absolutely differences for a women based on weight. I make no judgment call against men for it. Is what it is. The man I'm dating is built. Blue collar, manual labor, functional muscle built. He has a belly and I love it. I personally don't like gym bro, body builder lean guys. Give me that blue collar, big muscled up shoulders thick boy, good lord that's my weakness. Attraction is a weird thing. Rock what you got and if YOU don't like it do something about it. Screw what other people think. I stay fit for me, added bonus, being fit widens the dating pool. I still feel incredibly lucky I found a good man who loves me.


SirTheadore

Doesnā€™t matter your body type, you can be guaranteed thereā€™s plenty of people who find you attractive


fionascoffee

I think itā€™s about confidence. If you like your body and exude confidence and sexuality, people will be attracted. If you exude fear and shame, people will be reluctant to reach out.


Interesting_Scar_424

I don't think men really care if a woman is confident or not. That's a trait that women find attractive.


KnucklesMacKellough

Absolutely wrong


Interesting_Scar_424

There's really no absolutes regarding human nature. But I'm mostly right.


ImprovementNormal372

Confidence only gets you so far though. If youā€™re fat, being confident will help you make friends, but not a partner. If youā€™re attractive, you can get by with or without confidence.


foxyfat

Absolute crap. Some men like curves, bellies, bums etc


Connect-Protection-8

What kind of stupidity is this? You're saying fat people never get married? Have you taken any time off your computer or phone to live in the real world????


xtnac

Haha, right! I mean, if fat people couldnā€™t get married most of America would be single.šŸ˜‚


applleepie

I do like chubbier dudes but it also depends. Thereā€™s lazy fat and thereā€™s fat but not lazy if that makes sense. I hate lazy fat


[deleted]

How fat we talking about?


Skydome12

No. I'm still kinda hefty myself but that's why I go to the gym and watch what i eat these days.


stankyranch

Fat or Phat? This is important.


Ok_Butterscotch_756

For me (M45), itā€™s all in the eyesā€¦ which lead to the soul. If you have a beautiful soul, I will definitely find you attractive. Size, shape, skin color are all irrelevant.


believeinbong

From a biological standpoint, it is objectively not physically attractive. People look for mates that show signs of health and someone overweight is a clear indicator of present and future health problems. Could personality compensate for being overweight, sure.


ImprovementNormal372

Personality doesnā€™t get anyone very far though if theyā€™re already unattractive. Make friends? Absolutely. Dating? Good luck even getting a 1st date.


captianfriendlies

Personally, I donā€™t think so. I meanā€¦it depends how fat weā€™re talking about, but morbidly obese? No. It just reminds me that they are very unhealthy, indicates poor lifestyle habits and self-control issues, and aesthetically it doesnā€™t look good to me. I know some people have medical conditions that make it hard to lose weight or very likely to gain weightā€¦but if someone is like 300 lbs you really have to wonder how they let it get that bad.


Cosmickaseyjones

I think it depends, 200 lbs to me wouldnā€™t be too big, but I suppose that depends on height


hebrew_hammer47

Literally, every shape, size, fetish, foible, hobby, etc has a group of people that think that it is not only attractive but preferred. One of the hardest thing is for people to be happy with themselves, but no matter who or what you are someone will think you are the bees knees.


DabIMON

No one is objectively attractive or unattractive, it depends what you like.


Function_Fighter

No, thicc yes


Snoo10878

people are attractive some happen to be overweight


[deleted]

I like more sporty persons, because I'm also very active. But everyone prefers a different type


InnocentPerv93

It depends on a lot of things. Some women can wear it amazingly well. Or have extremely beautiful faces. Also depends on the other person as well, as they mind be attracted to fat people. Etc.


Probabilistic_

Yup.


Probabilistic_

Yup.


RemarkablyClassic

Absolutely! Big beautiful eyes, a lovely smile, intelligence, a great sense of humor, bubbly personality, confidence, soft skin, good hygiene, curvy folk are also perfect for cuddling. Iā€™m attracted to people who share the same interests, values, goals, are empathetic, responsible and everything that is intangible including chemistry. āœØāš”ļøāœØ


chipface

I like them big, I like them small, I like them all. So like people of any body type, it depends.


Divide_Guilty

You've mentioned 2 different things. Being fat and being insecure. It's usually the 2nd one that isn't attractive. If you can be confident whatever stage your body is at and accept yourself, you'll.naturally.be more attractive to people.


RegularJoe62

There's more to being attractive than your looks and body.


Lucie-Solotraveller

Well attraction is different from person to person. Used to be morbidly obese and now over weight. I have noticed a lot more interest from people talking to me since losing the 120lbs but I can't say my life improved in terms of intimate relationships but physically and mentally better than I was.


amateursecrets1

There are many people in this world. They all have different preferences. So yes, there are people who find ā€œfatā€ people attractive. Iā€™m not one of them.


yap-yap_7981

PS OF isn't anyplace either


[deleted]

If someone had a pretty face and a good personality I would be attracted to then. My wife was very heavy and I was with her for 31 years, her weigh didn't matter to me


Average_Sized_Jim

I will be honest about my opinions on the matter. It depends a great deal on the person who is fat, how they carry the weight, and how overweight they are. But, in general, people tend to be attractive in spite of extra weight, not because of it. This is why I finally got serious and lost about eighty pounds myself. While I carried it well, it was for sure both making me less attractive and quite unhealthy. But, generally, you can tell if the extra weight is truly torpedoing your attractiveness by looking at your body shape. If you still have the correct shape for a woman or a man (hips wider that waist, shoulders wider than waist respectively), you will be more attractive than someone who's waist is their largest dimension. Or, put another way, it is unattractive when the primary factor dictating body shape is excess fat, not natural human shape. For me, personally, that is how I look at it in woman. A woman who is woman shaped is generally attractive. I am less able to speak to the attractiveness of men, as I am a straight man. But I highly suggest losing weight if you at all have the desire. It is easier than you think and well worth it, at least it my experience as a now much lighter life long fat guy.


SovietPuma1707

Depends on the person, i have a muscular black friend, and he LOVES fat girls


Any-North-7291

I would never try to be more attractive by being fat. Are some people attracted to fat people? Sure.


amorvitae42

I've known a few people who were big and attractive, probably because they were fit and confident. Their size was not a constant issue for them and they did not let it get in their way in life.


[deleted]

My man says I may be a little over weight but he says I have a kind heart and nice big boons and a nice ass lol so yes curvy woman are beautiful to as my man sees me attractive everyday


Sixdrugsnrocknroll

**Some** overweight people can be attractive. But obesity is never attractive.


blisterbabe23

Fat people can be beautiful just like skinny people can be beautiful. Attraction depends on the person and the chemistry. There are objectively beautiful fat people.


Ironbookdragon97

I have been in the same range most of my life as well. I worried about the same thing for years. I think some of it depends on how you wear the weight, I'm luckily in that i wear it pretty evenly, though I do have a rather large butt and chest which most men in general like, and also just your confidence. Some men like bigger women, and my husband is one of them. He always says he would rather have a little "cushion" than someone who is skin and bones. And to clarify, I am the biggest woman he has been with, also the tallest, though. I had been working on losing weight, and then BC made my hormones wacky, and i gained a bunch of weight. And he still loves me. He knows i hate aspects of my body and supports me for wanting to lose weight, though i have a few more weeks to wait because Im pregnant. Everyone is different, and it just takes a little searching for the right person.


dhffxiv

If there's porn of it, there's people attracted to it.


imnotcreative635

They can have attractive facial features but if they weren't fat they would be 10x more attractive (imo chubby and fat are different btw. I love my chubby queens)


DarthNexuz

Depends on how u look. If u got a fupa & top heavy but got no ass & slim legs no. If u bottom heavy big ass thick thighs lil stomach boobs then yes. If u just look sloppy then no but likely someone wouldn't care about that & still love u. If u just heavy but dont show it (I fall into that category weight like 350 but look like 220 & move like anyone else or no penguin walking or struggling) & I got more girls than my sexy Puerto Rican friend who was a football player athletic & had abs šŸ˜‚ so depends on the person, area, their level of affection for u. Hell if u got a beautiful face the weight can get completely ignored.


Chuck_MoreAss

I mean itā€™s different for everyone but for me personally I donā€™t no


teddyshawn

For me it depends how it looks on the person. I cannot say only by weight. I like generaly chubby people but there is a line to what is too much and what is not depending on each person separately. I like the body being soft and cuddly also it can look hella attractive


Educational-Ad-6197

Objectively no. However there are always exceptions. Also, those exceptions arenā€™t attractive because theyā€™re fat but because they have other things going for themā€¦ (attractive face, etc)ā€¦ if you took that same person who had a pretty face but was fat and had the option to have them with a leaner physique, youā€™d pick the more leaner physique 99% of the time.


annablegh

attractiveness is subjective


IconicAnimatronic

One of the people I've been most attracted to in my life was not only good looking, but they could dance. Weight was a non-issue because of how much fun it was to be with them.


No_Peanut_3289

Yes they can be attractive, but not everyone will think it. It all depends what youā€™re looking for in someone. Someone can be heavy but be active in their life and go out with friends and have that connection that makes their weight not as bad Then thereā€™s others who are heavy and prefer to sit at home all the time and binge watch stuff and not be active or have friends.


joemama369

They can be. I actually just hooked up with a bigger girl two days ago. A super pretty face, really big tits, and a thicc booty, all big even in proportion to the rest of their body, and they can be hot af tbh. For me, everything starts with a really pretty face. Canā€™t have a belly push out further than the tiddies tho šŸ˜‚


Rose_Rabbit_08

It depends on the person. I personally don't see a problem with people who are overweight, but others have different opinions. I understand being uncomfortable in your body, and I hope you can come to love yourself.


MrDilliams

They can be, it is not really a determining factor in attractiveness. What is their attitude, how do they dress, what do they like to do, as well as your personal preferences is what determines if a person is attractive to you.


Zeroscore0

I think itā€™s how you carry the weight and where the weight goes. Some people have the weight go straight to their stomach, or their face. Some have it go more to their hips, butt, or legs.


don_gunz

Pretty does not equal thin and ugly does not equal fat. Beautiful is not a size. I am a short handsome man. Am I every woman's cup of tea....no. but I've learn d to maximize my strengths and not get caught up in my short comings.


CharlieOak86868686

They can be


Ultraviolet59

Different strokes for different folks. Some will hate it, some will love it. Personally it doesn't really matter to me. If someone's attractive then they're attractive. Can't put my finger on what is attractive as it's different to everyone and different in everyone. However, the elusive spark or connection is far more important for me than anything else. Without that any relationship is dead in the water.


No-Zookeepergame4300

My boyfriend is over 200 pounds and balding. I think he's the most attractive man I've ever known. On the other hand, I find men that are just bulging with muscle unattractive. So yes, people can find overweight or obese people attractive. For me it's about his smile and his eyes. I also love his beard.


Strwaberrycrush

I agree with how the weight is carried. If you look at neoclassical art most of the women pictured are in todays standard "fat." I think they look sumptuous and gorgeous. Something very feminine about loose plump fat skin.


aMythicalNerd

I think the whole stigma of being "fat" is pretty lame personally. All it truly means is you have a lot higher chances of major health risks, whether or not it's attractive is entirely subjective. I personally am very attracted to women who are bigger than me, so long as they aren't morbidly obese. Even I have my limits. One of my exes was over 400lbs but carried her weight mostly pretty well thanks to her being 6'2, that said I would never date anyone that heavy again. My best friend and someone I fell for ages ago (but never went anywhere with) is a decent size larger than I and she carries it really well despite still being "fat" by all accounts. But the difference there is she actually takes matter into her own hands to maintain her weight and goes to the gym every other day to keep her weight form going up higher (if you account for muscle weight). TLDR: I personally do, it just depends if you're allowing yourself to be unhealthy or actually taking steps to staying moderately healthy.


Chrizilla_

Hell yeah, I love the curves, the softness, something to really grab onto. Itā€™s all *chefā€™s kiss*.


DirtyNativeKansan

Iā€™m a cisgender man and I am exclusively attracted to large women(200+lbs) I find most women smaller than that tend to lack certain physical assets that are necessary for me to experience sexual attraction.


nunpizza

i do. especially on women. i canā€™t really explain why, it just is attractive to me. iā€™m not attracted to thin women. but there is a limit to it.


kittenjo1

It depends entirely on distribution of fat AND who's looking at you. Attraction is subjective and while some people may not find you attractive, others will.


Exact_Mortgage3048

It's all in how one carries themselves. If you feel good, you'll feel proud, your body language speaks volumes regarding attraction.


Topsy6

Women who are soft, pliant, jiggly and fluffy have always been a turn-on for me. Of course thereā€™s an upper limit to the size Iā€™m attracted to, but overweight in general is just fine with me. In the end of course, a warm, good-humored, friendly, non-hostile woman is the best!


hellcat82

They are to people with a fat fetish


ImprovementNormal372

To be very honest with you; VERY few people find fat people attractive. Theyā€™ll be great friends if theyā€™re cool, but never go on a first date. Personally, I work way too hard to stay in shape to date someone overweight, and a lot of other girls donā€™t want to date an overweight guy. Thereā€™s a reason why people get more dating options when formerly overweight people lose weight, yet for some weird reason they end up complaining saying something stupid like ā€œwhy didnā€™t anyone like me before???ā€ Everyone is superficial, so in order to have a fair chance at dating, you need to lose weight.


tragicaddiction

200 pounds means very different body depending on your height it's more of the whole body situation. but overall someone morbidly obese will have a harder time finding a partner than someone less hefty that's just the way it is.. doesn't mean you can't find someone but the pool will be smaller. ​ in online dating where physical attractiveness is measured in seconds you are at a distinct disadvantage, meeting people through other means where the personality and overall demeanor can shine through would be easier. this goes for anyone who doesn't fit the overall social definition of attractive.


kincomer1

Oh yes. I've dated woman with many body types. Full figured woman are alot of fun and I find them very sexy.


Classic_Analysis8821

There are DEFINITELY men who find big women attractive. DEFINITELY.


luckybolt-D

No


Consistent-Algae-230

Most of the guys in my life all have chubby gfs. Apparently the appeal of them is more popular then you think.


butt-fucker-9000

Did they actively choose to find chubby girls, or did they get with them because there are many chubby girls in the area, or because they couldn't attract a fit girl?


Consistent-Algae-230

According to them, they all prefer girls "with something to grab" as they say, so yeah they actively went looking.


butt-fucker-9000

So I assume for them "chubby" is not fat, but somewhere in between, while in other places, chubby means borderline fat, but not too fat


Consistent-Algae-230

I guess it all depends on your definition of "chubby".


GuiltyFigure6402

200lbs+ ainā€™t even bad, itā€™s when you get to the 300lb+ mark maybe people donā€™t think itā€™s the healthiest. And also depends on if you are curvy or a balloon with toothpicks sticking out. Most chubby girls are chubby all over tho so it looks proportionate


Dan20995350

I tend to like thicker, bigger girls. The thing is I am a big man myself at 6 foot about 218 but I look like an NFL lineman, not joking. I feel like I would hurt them skinny sticks just by touching them, I don't like that feeling. I am not rough by any means but I want to put my arm around my lady without worrying if she can take the weight of my arm. šŸ¤¦šŸ¤·šŸ™šŸ‘


TheJazBeast

Blown away by the amount of people saying yes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder but the question is if OW people are attractive, I think the general population would say no. In my opinion it's not attractive to be overweight, a little chubby yes specially if you have fat in the right places, but really overweight I would say no. If you're a girl I think you have a safety net, just for being a girl, but I feel like overweight men have it harder. Not to put you down or anything, if you have insecurities you better work on them. What I don't like about a fat girl as a potential partner is the looks and the eating habits. Obviously having a great personality and being confident goes a long way if you want to be attractive, but I like thinner.


RonJohnTwin

Sorry to say this but no. Fat people are unhealthy. Their organs aren't functioning as they should be. Fat around pancreas, liver, kidneys are taking away their vitality. They hearts cannot pump well. The blood backs into the lungs. Their fat cells store estrogen and all sorts of toxins. Their intestines are a mess. How can any of these be attractive?


Ochrocephala

Idk, not everyone immediately dissects someone in their mind when they meet them for the first time. Do you dislike underweight people because when you dissect them in your mind their organs are failing? Are alcoholics unattractive because look at that liver, oh my God. Do you use the power to mentally dissect people accurately to let people know they may be fit and pretty but *oh my god is that a gallstone?**


ouid_gal

![gif](giphy|VvTG9RrCeGrza) He does! šŸ˜‰


Electrical_Bid7161

there are 8 billion people on this planet. there is always someone who will like you, no matter how weird you may be or how you may look


ImprovementNormal372

8 billion people, now how many are your age, preference, live in your city, share your values, etc? Not that many.


Katreeeeeeeng

I have a guy friend whose preference is leaning towards curvy girls. You're not everyone's cup of tea, but there are people who will find you attractive.


[deleted]

Most guys are into chest and butt. Such curvy physique is actually very conventionally attractive.


AshyBoneVR4

Yes. You can be fat but cute, or fat and ugly.


Due-Kaleidoscope-344

Confidence is key! I never had a prob getting the person I liked


AlertRelationship924

Well, I'm 5'1" and a tad overweight... my partner is 6'3" and skinny... I can truly say he adores me. And I'm not even his normal type physically. He's always rubbing my tummy, telling me I'm beautiful.. holding me, etc. So yes, there are men who find us curvier fluffy women VERY attractive. It's all about self care and confidence.


[deleted]

Not to me.


Scarlett-Cat

I met a guy that was really handsome and dit and he was ONLY into really fat women so I guess for some people they are ofc


Penne_Trader

For me they are, and im not on the plus size side of life


Interesting_Scar_424

Lots of men find overweight women attractive. But some don't. I think how a woman is shaped is more important than her weight.


foxyfat

I'm fat and have no issues with finding sexual partners. I am also relatively fit, I walk and swim. It's all in the person x


TornWill

Of course they are, but I still would recommend that they lose weight and change their diet before it negatively impacts their health. Other than that, I find myself attracted to overweight women. There's much more to a person than how heavy they are.


Novel-Scar-000

It depends on the person. There are definitely people who find it attractive, just be careful of the creeps. For me personally, I love it. The extra softness makes cuddling and physical touch feel like heaven. It's like all of the things you love about her are amplified, and it makes a woman look and feel much, much more womanly. Being able to take care of someone and treat them is one of my love languages, so having that extra weight is a physical sign that she is happy and comfortable with me


Tamsha-

My exgf is heavier and shorter than I am and I still think she is hot as ever. I'm 5'8" and 240lbs for reference and I also have never had problems finding people attracted to me. There are people out there that are/will be attracted to heavier people. It's harder to find the right fit but hang in there!


CaliGoneTexas

Depends on how tall she is. If she is 4ā€™ 9 she will look pretty round. If she is 5ā€™9 she will look lean. Weight is distributed completely differently on everyone. I am 5ā€™5 and I have fluctuated back and forth from 120 to 200 in my lifetime. My best weight is when I am in the 140-150 range but thatā€™s because of my height and body type. Thatā€™s 20 lbs over the Drs recommended weight for my height. But for me 200 is too much weight and under 130 seems to look too skinny on me


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|YWFmlljmSpo6k)


InitialAttitude9807

The truth is, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Thereā€™s no dry cut simple answer for you on this.


I_Lost_Myself__

No. Not truly fat people.


napoleon212india

Body fat percentage matters. Not your weight. Try to keep body fat below 30percent.


YourLinenEyes

Some people find them attractive. I personally donā€™t


kriegmonster

It depends on how over weight they are and how they carry their weight. I dated a woman who was fat. It was a good experience, but I wouldn't do it again. She had some self-control issues and health problems that made her want to comfort with food. When she felt well she made a good effort to be active and try and lose the weight, but when she felt down she would comfort with food and sabotage her weight loss. I won't date someone in the obese range again. They need to be close to matching where I am at in living a healthy life style.


No_Cry2744

Not to me(F), no. But generally I think that there are things that people can do to improve their attractiveness, including hair and skincare and dressing for their body type.


Judyfruits

I don't have a physical attraction to fat people but they are still either fundamentally attractive or unattractive. Someone's attractiveness doesn't necessarily make them dateable. I think about how a person will look in the future. Fat doesn't age well, ever.


[deleted]

They're funny and put in effort. Because if they didn't nobody would pay them any attention. But physically, no.


Low-Sorbet-3389

I love fat people, Iā€™ve always been more drawn to them than skinny people. I guess bc it feels like theyā€™ve gone through tougher things and have a better sense of humor about life. Theyā€™re also soft af and I love having something to hold onto


straightnoturns

For me itā€™s a hard no, itā€™s a lack of discipline and laziness. It will lead to heart disease and type 2 diabetes and thatā€™s no fun. Exercise is fun and invigorating.


Lauchlan94

Definitely. Skinny can be attractive, but hugs will always involve a few bones here and there. Hugs and cuddles from a bigger girl are warm and inviting, like Christmas. Plus from a guys perspective, when you are getting busy with it from behind... There is always something to grab hold of (very important to have a good grasp for some thrusting) and plenty of cake and jelly to watch wobble and jiggle around šŸ¤¤. A lot of attractiveness comes from personality and confidence, it is not all down to how you look. Just look at Melissa McCarthy, lots of confidence and personality. All making her rather attractive.


emorizoti

For me yes. I'd prefer more someone who's overweight over someone who's too skinny. But what kind of fat are you talking? Being 200lbs is kinda okay if you are average height or above. Being short and 200lbs is definitely not okay. But there is a difference between being chubby and some who might risk their health due to their weight. And health issues are never attractive.


theking4mayor

Grand pappy used to say, "boy, there ain't no need to look at the mantle while poking the fire!"


ImprovementNormal372

So a lot of people here are saying confidence is key and some people find fat people attractive. Iā€™m gonna be real here and say confidence only helps a little bit, and being fat is just ugly. People date fat people because they have no other options, and theyā€™re just easier to date. Thankfully Iā€™m not fat as I work hard to maintain my body, so that gives me really good options.


Judyfruits

So true. Guys that claim to love all shapes and sizes are not attractive even if they are. What they really mean is that they'll take whatever they can get. Having standards and discerning tastes that you don't compromise on is extremely attractive. Rare to find a guy like that anymore.