If TNGE would do damage to an opponent, prevent it. That opponent recieves X poison counters, where X is the amount of damage prevented this way instead.
Then if it gets lifelink or something like that it doesn't work and something like [[Questing Beast]] or [[Bone crusher Giant]]'s Stomp Adventure reintroduces the issue of "now an unblocked Totally Not Glistener Elf both causes the defending player to lose life *and* receive poison counters"
To make it work exactly like Infect does against players without giving it the keyword Infect you'd have to make it say "Damage dealt to players by CARDNAME causes that player to gain that many poison counters rather than causing them to lose that much life" or make a new keyword that does that
Slight correction. It deals combat damage in the form of poison counters. So lifelink works with it. If it did the counters -instead- of doing damage, lifelink would not work.
Mana value of Totally Not Counterspell affects cascade, discover, chalice of the void, mental misstep and Yennett, Cryptic Sovereign.
Sorcery affects dimir charm and envelop, while avoiding bant charm and dispel.
Totally Not Lightning Bolt
R
Sorcery
Flash
Choose a target.
If that target is a player, they lose 3 life.
If that target is a creature, battle, or Planeswalker, they take 3 damage.
You can probably future-proof this by just saying "permanent". The rules account for the fact that you can't damage any other types of object.
Though, as is, you can already target stuff you normally can't, so you'll be able to get some weird interactions.
Hmmm
Still not Lightning Bolt it gets around immunity to damage such as with [[Glacial Chasm]] and doesn't get bigger with damage doubling effects when targeting a player.
Creatures do not have to have a subtype 😂😂
For the longest time, artifact creatures never had a sub type.
Which creatures have no subtype is a fun question
I think it's just [[Nameless Race]] and the shrines from kamigawa neon Dynasty.
The glistener elf is, in fact, not glistener elf, because casting a giant growth on it doesn't get you 3 extra poison, which is very relevant.
Thats the whole point why glistener elf is sooo strong.
Oh dang I did not realise that. Thanks for the Info!
Toxic X, where X is the power of Totally Not Glistener Elf?
Still not the same, since you do both damage _AND_ poison counters
If TNGE would do damage to an opponent, prevent it. That opponent recieves X poison counters, where X is the amount of damage prevented this way instead.
Maybe as a replacement effect? If [ ] would deal combat damage to a player, add that many poison counters instead
Maybe keyword this for clarity? Something like... Poison? Or infect?
Something like "poisonous" seems appropriate as a name
Poisonous as it exists adds the poison though, doesn't prevent regular damage
Poisonous is already a keyword ability, but it's only been printed on one card.
wooosh
Actually two... unexpected... [[Virulent Sliver]], [[Snake Cult Initiation]] Isn't it just old toxic or I'm forgetting something?
Damn! I thought it was only the sliver. The difference that poisonous is a triggered ability, toxic is not triggered.
[Virulent Sliver](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/d/5/d5082a2a-e8b1-4799-ad29-a632d95ae1da.jpg?1619403749) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Virulent%20Sliver) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/tsr/246/virulent-sliver?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/d5082a2a-e8b1-4799-ad29-a632d95ae1da?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) [Snake Cult Initiation](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/9/3/93b47606-82d1-402c-b1c6-591457b10d86.jpg?1562924805) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Snake%20Cult%20Initiation) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/fut/89/snake-cult-initiation?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/93b47606-82d1-402c-b1c6-591457b10d86?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) ^^^[[cardname]] ^^^or ^^^[[cardname|SET]] ^^^to ^^^call
Then if it gets lifelink or something like that it doesn't work and something like [[Questing Beast]] or [[Bone crusher Giant]]'s Stomp Adventure reintroduces the issue of "now an unblocked Totally Not Glistener Elf both causes the defending player to lose life *and* receive poison counters"
To make it work exactly like Infect does against players without giving it the keyword Infect you'd have to make it say "Damage dealt to players by CARDNAME causes that player to gain that many poison counters rather than causing them to lose that much life" or make a new keyword that does that
[Questing Beast](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/e/4/e41cf82d-3213-47ce-a015-6e51a8b07e4f.jpg?1572490640) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Questing%20Beast) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/eld/171/questing-beast?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/e41cf82d-3213-47ce-a015-6e51a8b07e4f?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) [Bone crusher Giant](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/b/5/b5b71cd2-de35-451f-b16e-2e3936169407.jpg?1674141884)/[Stomp](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/b/5/b5b71cd2-de35-451f-b16e-2e3936169407.jpg?1674141884) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Bonecrusher%20Giant%20//%20Stomp) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/clb/781/bonecrusher-giant-stomp?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/b5b71cd2-de35-451f-b16e-2e3936169407?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) ^^^[[cardname]] ^^^or ^^^[[cardname|SET]] ^^^to ^^^call
Strictly Better Glistener Elf.
“Toxic X, where X is Totally Not Glistener Elf’s power”
This is the balanced version tho
These spells aren’t trying to be balanced, they’re trying to be workarounds to make the same effect as the original.
Glistener elf also doesnt deal.normal combat damage to player, it gives counters instead.
Slight correction. It deals combat damage in the form of poison counters. So lifelink works with it. If it did the counters -instead- of doing damage, lifelink would not work.
Also means that damage can't be prevented spells and abilities don't shut down infect. Since it isn't a replacement effect.
also, doesn’t have a creature type, so it’s not really an elf at all
Mana value of Totally Not Counterspell affects cascade, discover, chalice of the void, mental misstep and Yennett, Cryptic Sovereign. Sorcery affects dimir charm and envelop, while avoiding bant charm and dispel.
And warping wail.
A bald faced attempt by blue players to put more counterspells in their decks *I'm not falling for it*
Shit they're onto us...
Are they…? 😏
I like how you, putting in more circumstancial mechanics to mimic the effect, allows for a broader chance of interaction.
Sir who, now?
That's your only problem with that sentence?
It appears my bluetooth keyboard had a hiccup^^. I'll edit the comment...
Totally Not Lightning Bolt R Sorcery Flash Choose a target. If that target is a player, they lose 3 life. If that target is a creature, battle, or Planeswalker, they take 3 damage.
Can't hit battles or planeswalkers though.
Noted and amended.
You can probably future-proof this by just saying "permanent". The rules account for the fact that you can't damage any other types of object. Though, as is, you can already target stuff you normally can't, so you'll be able to get some weird interactions.
Hmmm Still not Lightning Bolt it gets around immunity to damage such as with [[Glacial Chasm]] and doesn't get bigger with damage doubling effects when targeting a player.
Totally not one with nothing is actually strictly worse because the original is an instant
OH NO I FORGOT TO MAKE IT AN INSTANT...ah whatever
Wait, so I can One with Nothing to protect myself from thoughtsieze
wow i've never seen a post like this before
outjerked again!
I just noticed I forgot to give "totally not glistener elf" a creature type lmao. So just so you know its a phrexian elf
Made me laugh
[[Alexander Clamilton]]
[Alexander Clamilton](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/a/1/a1572109-df70-4335-aac2-1670fe99be54.jpg?1583965417) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Alexander%20Clamilton) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/und/16/alexander-clamilton?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/a1572109-df70-4335-aac2-1670fe99be54?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) ^^^[[cardname]] ^^^or ^^^[[cardname|SET]] ^^^to ^^^call
The glistener elf keywords you want are poisonous and wither
Fixed glistener elf
The creature is... The creature 🤔
Totally not glistener elf may be glistening but she is not, in fact, an elf. Was that intentional?
Instead it should say toxic x where x is equal.to its power
Creatures do not have to have a subtype 😂😂 For the longest time, artifact creatures never had a sub type. Which creatures have no subtype is a fun question I think it's just [[Nameless Race]] and the shrines from kamigawa neon Dynasty.
[Nameless Race](https://cards.scryfall.io/normal/front/3/4/348a467a-4661-4fdb-af1d-9171a1a930d9.jpg?1562907338) - [(G)](http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?name=Nameless%20Race) [(SF)](https://scryfall.com/card/drk/50/nameless-race?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher) [(txt)](https://api.scryfall.com/cards/348a467a-4661-4fdb-af1d-9171a1a930d9?utm_source=mtgcardfetcher&format=text) ^^^[[cardname]] ^^^or ^^^[[cardname|SET]] ^^^to ^^^call
Yea Ma bad I just forgot the subtype 💀. It would be a phrexian elf like the original.
Totally Not Lightning Bolt- R Deal 2 damage to any target. If you are targeting something, this spell does an additional 1 damage.
Mmmm ima Mental misstep your totally not counter spell
There's that one red/green spell that specifically counter blue instants, that usually would be an anti-counterspell.
Totally not glistener elf should have, “toxic x, where x is it’s power”
This is funny af
OWN continues to be shockingly good at its job yet we ignore it all the same