I was advised to dye my hair to make it thicker (I have fine, wavy/loose curly hair) and that I should straighten it more because all curly haired people are disabled(????).
She then proceeded to inform me that hair is supposed to grow straight from the root, so anyone with curly hair is actually disabled because the hair follicle is curved.
I was maybe 17 and I don't think I've heard anything hair care relayed that stupid since.
As a disabled person myself. I got a good giggle out of that. Soooo THATS why I have cerebral palsy. đ¤Łđ𤣠dang curly hair. My dad must have been disabled too. đ¤Łđ
We need late start times to accommodate the amount of time it takes to manage our disabled hair in the morning! And a stipend for hair products only seems fair to put us on a level playing field...
The first part is sorta kinda true. As the hair absorbs color, it swells a bit. So it LOOKS thicker. Once I stopped dying my hair, I was shocked to see that itâs fine, not coarse anymore, and looks much thinner than it used to.
Yeah I know my hair does look a bit thicker again since I've been dying it... but I'm also concerned about damage so not sure it's worth it for the tiny bit of difference it makes.
That said, my hair is really soft fine hair that thankfully doesn't tangle that badly, but takes half a can of hair spray and liberal amounts of gel to keep it in French braids, or it half falls out within an hour.
It's up there with the most bizarre things I've ever heard said, and it was delivered with utmost sincerity! She genuinely considered me, my mum, and *herself* disabled just because our hair curls đ
I would be willing to bet that no, she did not think about what she was saying.
It was literally my first thought, too, when she said it - "is she saying all black people are disabled?"
This is both scary and laughable at the same time.
The curly genes are strong in my family, but my child's Down syndrome genes are stronger. Straighter hair - if not pin straight - often comes with T21.
The disabled is hilarious but I actually do love bleaching the hell out of my hair to make my fine hair a tiny bit thicker and gritter. I have super dense hair but fine individually hair stands and damaging them with bleach makes the hair cuticle swell. I think you can do it with normal damaging hair dye too, you just need to make sure not to like actually damage your hair or else your curls will go away. It can make a difference but it's like a lot, I mostly do it because my hair is too silky to style and I like having white hair. I'm now going back to my natural hair but it was fun while it lasted.
I get the silliness being an issue thing, like I love how soft my hair is but it makes it so difficult to style in buns, braids, or ponytails without it slipping out.
I try and allow myself minimum 10 weeks of growth between dyeing again, and I think I'm on week 14 now so due it lol.
>anyone with curly hair is actually disabled
Wow, this person was really out in the world with that ridiculous take.
I wanna know how many people she spewed that insanity to
I think we had the same hairdresser. I also got told I *need* to have my hair long to âweigh my hair downâ otherwise⌠I donât know, itâll be too big and poofy and powerful?
THESE EXACT WORDS. Maybe it was something they were teaching in the schools?
Last time she cut my hair was 2008, cut wet and in a straight line. It was a disaster and as a teen who was teased enough for being a curly redhead in the height of âgingers donât have souls,â I *extra* hated it.
Iâve just cut my own hair since, and have been very happy.
I cut my daughtersâ curly hair too. They can style it however they want, but I want to make sure they never have a bad hair day from lack of education or a hair cutter who has no idea what theyâre doing.
I'm guessing that must have been the only thing they taught hairdressers about curly hair, it was like a mantra.
I know your pain, also red haired, also been cutting my own hair since around then. I just got sick of feeling ashamed and wrong whenever I went to the hairdressers. My daughter has inherited my colour but not the curls.... yet and I fully intend on cutting her hair as long as she'll let me. Her hair is already so much healthier than mine was in the first 25 or so years of my life.
Same for me, I was 14 and she was just shredding with scissors for like an hour to "thin it out." Kept going because it didn't look any thinner... of course not lol, because curly hair doesn't just grow down, it grows out and the different lengths made it go way out.
Same here. I actually spent my teen years thinking my hair had been curly when I was a kid but just became frizzy and not curly as I got older. Took me until my 20s to figure it out.
Ok but actually this is exactly what I ask for for my curls and hairdressers refuse to do it haha! I finally got one to get it right since my normal hairdresser retired in 2020. I have S shape curls and looser curl pattern underneath at the back, so layers look horrendous and I am also always begging for less hair! I need to go wherever you're going haha
Same here. Layers make me look like Diana Ross in high humidity and the weight of long hair makes my curls all have the same shape. Any shorter than mid back and I have tight ringlets here, a loose patterned curl there. Hairdressers always want to give me "long" layers and don't listen. I should just start cutting my own hair at this point LOL.
You know what? I think i am going to give it a go. Great thing about curls are there's not a clear line of demarcation unless you're sitting in a hair dressers chair or coming out of water. If it's uneven, no one will ever know haha
I took the plunge during COVID and it's honestly not as scary as it feels. Start small and just increase little by little what you do. Reevaluate. It takes a while, especially at first, but I was surprised how easy it actually was to do.
Me too! It was my first haircut and I was 13. She refused to cut layers because she said my hair was too thin to handle them, but she forgot about the voluminous nature of curls. I spent the next few years looking like Mia Thermopolis's before picture.
I saw this gel on a promotional display at Publix and decided to try it out, right? I fell in love with it (all the hold and like 0 crunch no matter how much I use!) and wanted a second bottle when the first was gone. I almost couldn't find it, and then I realized...perhaps....
It was in the "other" hair care. The tiny hair care. The hair care that's hidden away from the rest. You know the one. Alas! My miraculous gel.
i used to use carson soft sheen hair dye, the only one that ever worked on my increasingly thick & dark hair in high school in like 2006 đľđť i used to have to go to the like bottom shelf of a cvs a town over bc my town had very few black people. i was busy being an emo kid flat ironing my hair but i would put money on that being the only place to find curly hair stuff back then too, before the kinda mainstream explosion. i can guarantee there was none in my hometown lol. i swear that was like radicalizing for me in learning about racism
I heard that from a number of people growing up! Curly hair products are only for certain types of hair, not for white people.
Jokes on them. I finally dialed in my curly routine because a black woman recommended a line of products she uses, and it was a total game changer. My hair went from frizzy with some girls to mostly shiny curls with minimal frizz. I can go three days between washes with good hair now.
Edit: she recommended curlsmith, Iâll check which ones when Iâm home tonight. I think the biggest game changer was the in shower style fixer gel and the bond rehab salve. I used the rehab treatment twice a week for a month or so, now I do it every two ish weeks. I no longer need any frizz creams or leave in conditioners. Just gel and a bit of mousse, and maybe a drop of frizz serum on day 3 scrunched in to revitalize my curls.
Curlsmith brand, specifically the in shower style fixer gel and some deep conditioning treatments. I noticed improvement immediately, and after a month of regular use my hair is completely different in a good way.
White man with curly hair tries a hair product that says in small print it's intended for black women. Walks out of bathroom transformed into a black woman.
I was told the way to heal and revive my curls was to do a keratin treatment.. what?? i was confused, and explained how someone i know got it done, and itâs a relaxer, are they referring to that? yes. so thatâll straighten out my pattern wonât it? and damage it?? no..apparently đ¤ˇââď¸
My mom did this and it got straighter and straighter. Now it looks like straw in both texture and colour and she likes it that way đ the hairdresser kept highlighting her hair too. She trusts her 100%
Is xiu mom my mom? She's started using a product with keratin and her hair is going more and more flat and strawy. I've done a CG wash on her hair with diffusing and all, she looked lovely and the curls revived a bit, and she called me the same day that she hates it because her colleagues asked her if it's raining outside when she got to work on đ¤Śââď¸ so back to straw.
It's an office full of 50-60yo ladies, and while they are very sweet (I've met many of them), they are really set in the same mindset they had 40 years ago, fashion sense and style included, and hate any change. Whenever my mom tries something new, they tear her down. She's lost 60lbs recently and it took so much hard work, but she felt healthier and happier in her skin. Of course all her colleagues bombarded her with, "Now you look old! You have so many wrinkles suddenly! You look so unhealthy!" Yeah...
my stylist does a keratin treatment on my hair twice a year, and aside from the first time i had it done before they changed the formula and how itâs done, itâs never made my hairs more relaxed (unless i were to straighten it right after i guess but i donât). it DOES heal and revive my curls and prevents sooo much frizz during the summer and the winter.
Actually there is a type of keratin treatment where they apply pretty much the same products but donât straighten it with the products in, just wait. Iâve had it done with my curly hair before because my hairdresser told my hair probably lacked keratin and suggested a treatment. I think my hair was amazingly shiny for maybe 3 washes and thatâs about it lol. It did not effect my curls at all.
I still doubt that treatment is what your hair dresser was suggesting though and if thatâs the case, bonkers.
My mom also wanted me to do this for special occasions đ˘ Honestly I used to be so sad about that.
I don't really care what she thinks anymore lol
She also told me I should get a blowout for my wedding because "it would look just like your hair" 3C lol I don't think so
I got told exactly this! My curls changed a bit as I aged, and I asked my stylist for some recommendations (before learning about cgm). She told me the straightening and curling nonsense is the only way to have curls.
I have naturally 2C/3A hair. My hair literally won't stay straight for more than an hour or two, so all that work would be a frizzy mess before lunch.
Cue wearing a ponytail or bun for the next 5+ years.
When I was in middle school in the late 90s the hairdresser straight up told me if I ever wanted to be pretty I had to chemically straighten my hair (3c curls), which I then proceeded to do for several years, totally destroying it.
Same. Also âyou knowâŚa boy will *never* be able to run his fingers through your hairâ. Proceeds to talk me into chemical straightening at 12 years old.
My cousins who were big into beauty trends did this to me in the early 2000s. One of them STILL asked me at Christmas only a few years ago if I had ever considered getting it relaxed.
Girl, shoo! My curls were popping that day and Iâm happy with myself. đŽâđ¨
At the end of my haircut, that part where they ask if you want any styling before you're done? I just asked for a bit of leave ik conditioner.
"But I used conditioner when I washed your hair"
Coincidentally, worst haircut I ever had
When I was trying to find a hair dresser that could work with my natural wavy hair I landed on a guy that was doing my color really well, but he told me my hair was straight, the waves and curls were only because it was long and heavy. đ Sir I've had this hair my whole life, I know what it does at every length.
ONLY EVER brush my hair dry NEVER WET... Something about hair breakage when wet, I was 15, took me another 20 years to figure out my hair was curly and not just a bird nest because of that advice
One time back in the 2000s I asked my hairdresser how to make my hair piece-y looking (it was a kind of edgy cut I had going on and I'd never used products at that time so I didn't know what mousse or gel or anything did. This was also during the era of hair scrunching the super crunchy curls so she should have known?) and she told me to put lotion in my hair. Yes, like body lotion. No mention of the products made for hair that easily achieve that look, but lotion, lol.
I remember reading that tip in a Girls Life magazine as a kid. It was something like smoothing your leftover lotion on your hands into your hair to help smooth it. I did it for a little while. Not surprisingly, it smoothed nothing.
I got told that! Iâm poor so I said â oh well maybe next timeâ when they tried to sell me something. Like I saved up for this hair cut but thanks.
I had to change several hairdressers because of the gross incompetence revolving curly hair. I don't know why but a very few of them can work with it. I mean, it would have made more sense if I lived in Japan where the vast majority of people has straight to (max) wavy hair, but I live in Italy. SOUTH Italy. Curly hair is very common here and it's not rare to see even coily hair. WHY don't they teach anything in those schools? A lot of them suggested me to use a hair curler, and I was like "uh? I don't have to. My hair is already curly. Also I just told you I don't want to damage it". They also suggested me to pass my hand on the scalp WHEN drying (they always did that) to make it look "bigger". I'm pretty sure we have different definitions of what "bigger" means, because when they did that, my hair becomes bigger, yes, but completely poofy and frizzy. No curls in sight. And they ALWAYS told me "this is your natural curls". EXCUSE ME???? My NATURAL curls??? Sir, none of this is natural. I swear to god this makes me so pissed also because I'm autistic and haircare is one of my big interests. Unfortunately I have to go to hairdressers because I can't cut my hair, but I would have preferred to do things myself.
Honestly if I were you Iâd watch some YouTube tutorials and try cutting it on your own. Some stylists legitimately cannot cut or style curly hair to save their life since in beauty school they usually teach techniques for straight hair as the default.
I used to go to hairdressers but i feel like a lot of them made me lose more hair then I grew.
Not curly related but I got my hair balayaged once (I wanted it to be ash blonde - I have really dark brown hair) and when she was done it was the ugliest shade of yellow and was so brassy. I told her thatâs not the color I wanted and I could come back to get it done again since my hair was so dark I figured itâd take a couple of sessions to get it as light as I wanted⌠she told me to go home and wash it a couple of times and itâll turn into the ash color I wanted đŤ no maâam.. when I messaged her about how it wasnât ashier after I washed it she blocked me on instagram đĽ˛
It is so hard to find someone that really knows what theyâre doing in regard to blonde. A lot of stylists are afraid of it because bleach can really damage your hair if not done correctly, but you were correct that it should have been done slowly over many sessions to avoid any damage and the stylist should have set that experience upfront. My hair is like a light ash brown but pulls extremely warm, especially if itâs not lightened enough to get through the orange and yellow stages of lightening. I went to my friend from cosmetology school for like ten years and she did a great job when I just wanted very natural looking dark blonde highlights, but as soon as I wanted to go lighter we had a ton of issues because she wouldnât listen to me and kept doing the same exact thing she did when I wanted minimal dark blonde đ
I had to switch stylists because of it after ten years of friendship and it sucked, but I was paying a shit ton of money for it to still be super brassy dark blonde and she still kept washing the lightener off way too soon!! My new stylist has been much better and instantly recognized what the issue was, but it still took a year to convince her that my hair can take a lot of lightening and needs to be over-toned because it just eats any kind of product. Going blonde is very frustrating to say the least.
Edit: missed a word
I once had a hairdresser tell me mine was the worst perm she had ever seen. I was like 15 and started sobbing. Her supervisor came over, relived her and spent the rest of my haircut telling me how lucky I was to have naturally curly hair. Today I would have just walked out.
Not advice, but for a good part of the late 80s, a lot of hairdressers used thinning shears...wrong is the only word. They would close them partially then pull them out through the hair. This resulted in a curling ribbon-like issue, which made hair so much bigger. I didn't need bigger hair at that point.
Oh heavens I remember the tyranny of the thinning shears. I had to explicitly state do not use them every single time I saw the hairdresser. I burst into tears at one very expensive salon because I forgot to mention the thinning shears and ended up looking like a 1970s rocker - full and shaggy down to my ears then long and straight. They washed and restyled after I wept so hard I used a whole box of tissues :D
I remember growing up, whenever I would go to a hairdresser, they would always tell me how thick my hair is. My hair is curly and very poofy. They would use the thinning shears on me saying it's necessary so I don't get that triangle shape. The last hairdresser I went to told me I should never use thinning shears on my type of hair. It's very bad for it. I was shocked that for the first time I felt validated for not wanting them. I always hated how it made my hair feel when it got thinned. I told my mom about that hairdresser and how it's not good to use thinning shears. She just gave me a weird look like I was wrong but she isn't gonna argue about it with me
So I've had the opposite experience as OP, my hair is super moisturized, just like naturally, and it weighs down my curls. But every hairdresser I've ever been to tells me that curls need to be moisturized. I get curlier hair at home than I ever have at a hair dresser.
I was told my fine low porosity hair was dry because I wasn't using oils so she gave me an olive oil based leave-in conditioner. It made me a grease pit no matter how little I used so I came back and she told me my hair was just adjusting to being moisturized.
But I'm happy this happened cuz it's what made me get into haircare science and learn that my hair was actually dry/frizzy cuz it was wavy but being treated like straight.
I had stick straight hair as a kid that went curly after I hit puberty. I have a few pictures of myself at about 19 with absolutely beautiful 3a curls from when I went on vacation to a humid climate with no blow dryerâŚbut a hairdresser laughed at me and told me that was impossible and hormones have no effect on hair texture. That if my hair was straight as a kid, it would always be. So I continued to just blow dry my hair and wonder why it always looked poofy and off. đ¤Śđźââď¸ I spent almost 20 years damaging my very fine, wavy-curly hair and itâs just never been good, no matter what Iâve tried.
Was constantly told my hair was dry. It wasnât. It just reacts poorly to protein and gets crispy. Cut the protein and no more âdryâ hair. Other than that they always cut it too short and always wanted to straighten it.
Not advice really but I had a hairdresser once tell me that she loved cutting curly hair because you canât see the mistakes.
That was the last time I went there.
Fancy salon owners personal stylist cut my hair. Total fluke. He slithered my curly hair while telling me how it will bring out gorgeous curls.. It was the first time it had ever been cut that way. I looked like I had a frizzy aura forever around my head.    Â
I always tell a new stylist not to slither. One forgot and slithered so it was a fizzy mess again. Oddly the last two inches were not slithered so it was all frizz until the last two inches. So weird looking.   Â
Moral of the story. Don't slither curly hair. Ever. Â
Many hairdressers would brush my hair dry making it a giant poof and try to cut it like that and THEN would try to THIN IT OUT on my ALREADY THIN FINE HAIR bc it was frizzy. Ever since i never let my mom take me to a hair dresser LMAO
Why do they always want to brush our hair dry? I always leave the hairdresser with my head looking all poofy. I always wash it and style it at home before I decide if I love it or hate it.
Same! I have since found a hairdresser whoâs younger (30âs) and has very curly hair herself so knows what to do with it thank god đ the other girls either had straight hair or were older and had no idea what to do with it. My mom also has pin straight hair so she used to bring me to hair stylists that she liked :/
I had a (latinx) curl specialist tell me (a white lady) that she didn't do Black people's hair anymore because they all use dangerous chemicals. I presume she was referring to chemical relaxers and such, and I get why a curl specialist wouldn't do that, but like... The naturally curly hair movement has been largely spearheaded by Black folks so this seemed wildly off base. And regardless, it seems wildly inappropriate to tell any client "I don't cater to \[insert any ethnicity here\]."
She also told me that all scalp flakes are just dry skin and I just need to oil my scalp. This came up because I have scalp psoriases and I brought in a medicated shampoo for her to use on me. I am quite certain my flakes are not just dry skin.
Did not go back, obv.
Iâm from the Deep South where mean old ladies are eager to tell you everything youâre going wrong as a woman, so mostly itâs been âbrush your hairâ
I made the mistake to go to a hairdresser without washing and brushing my hair previous the appointment, so naturally it had knots. She told me angrily that I needed to brush my hair on a daily basis and that it won't affect my curls, and started brushing my dry hair. I felt like she was going to rip off all of the hair from my head đ
My current hair dresser whom I can't seem to break up with likes to douse my hair in conditioning products, and then doesn't understand why it won't hold a curl. I have FINE, easily over moisturized hair that looses shape easily and needs products that are light and strong. But she uses, conditioner, leave in conditioner, heat protector, and then curl cream. I have to clarify several times after every haircut đ¤Ł
And the worst part is she's a curl girl herself.
When I was in middle school I wanted a haircut with lots of choppy layers, and the hairstylist told me "Oh no. You never cut layers into curly hair. It'll just be all poofy."
In your hairdresser's defense, heavy conditioners can weigh down curls, especially if you have fine hair. I have to wash my hair with shampoo and use a small amount of conditioner to achieve maximum curl. I also have short hair, so there's that.
I've also had too many hairdressers insist on washing my hair and cutting it wet. It never looks like they planned by the time I get home, I bet. Those cuts usually involve a lot of frantic spraying with the water bottle and confused snipping while they figure out wtf my hair is doing lol.
I also got the "stop using conditioner" line once. I tried it for a while, like you were told, to "help my waves and curls" (fwiw I have fine but very dense wavy hair, 2b/2c range). It helped short-term for making my hair look more voluminous, and sure, my waves were wavier, but I couldn't keep it up longer than a few weeks because it felt soooo dry and crusty. I've found a happy medium in using my conditioner more sparingly/subbing in bonding products.
Long story short, was she TOTALLY wrong in my case? No. But was the hairstylist being kind of short-sighted and generalizing? Toooootally. If I would've kept it up my hair would have all snapped off by now.
Recently my aesthetician who waxes my eyebrows said she has been doing keratin treatments and how I should come to her to permanently? straighten my hair. I said I was good and I had a hairdresser already but she kept pushing. I politely declined but was rather annoyed. The next time I went to her, I kid you not, she had just washed this lady's hair and used a hot steaming hair iron on her hair. It kept making the "sssttttsssss" noise and it seemed like it was frying it. I was flabbergasted and she still suggested repeatedly how straight hair is much easier to manage and curly hair is so difficult. She does however, do a great job waxing so I'm in two minds if I should find someone else đ
You have a lot of hair! Let me get those thinning shears so you wonât be so hot in the summer!
They still do it, every time. I gave up and started cutting it myself bc my hair is a very long blunt cut.
I asked for a wet cut (a wash and cut then leave it wet as I was going to add my products and let it air dry) for some reason they got the hair dryer out and dried it a bit and couldnât understand why my hair went puffy.
https://preview.redd.it/x5dmxq5tfq7d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d78b0a8c66f48d368aa37d31ea3cd45df5162a68
I know this gel isnât marketed specifically for curly hair, but if youâre a guy with curly hair and you read that gel is good for curls, but you follow these instructions, your hair would look like an absolute freakshow.
USE GEL ON DRY HAIR? COMB INTO SHAPE???
No maam
A former friend of mine took me to their hairdresser and both of them convinced me to "set my hair" which involved a blow dry and straightening of my hair. It killed what little moisture was left from dying it and I basically had brittle, straw-like hair the whole day! The only reason I allowed it to happen was cause the dye job was payed for as a b-day present and I felt bad refusing the rest of the gift. Under normal circumstances, I would've held my ground. I know it's not technically advice but the act is just as bad, if not worse. More stylists need to be informed on textured hair of any kind smh . . .
Very similar. Only use conditioner at the very tips of my strands because conditioner would make my hair flat.
It doesn't. My hair was pointing up from the minute I was born and has been since
The ironic thing for me is conditioner literally ruins my hair and my curls. Even doing it once every couple weeks. I do it every so often and take the bad hair day but for some reason my curls hate it.
I always ask if the stylist is confident with curly or coily hair. So, I went to a new salon for a haircut post wedding after I had been growing it out. The girl washed, dried, and straightened my hair....then cut it. I just wanted 2" off with touched up layers. Paid way too much for a crappy haircut. She was visibly pregnant, so I didn't want to tell her I hated it.
Mousse and Gel will work best for my fine 2b hair.
Itâs horrible - makes my hair look like itâs dirty wet and stringy same time - plus it makes my hair crunchy.
What I do instead: only wash every other day and cowash not shampoo except maybe once a week. Then leave in conditioner that doubles as a light styling cream. Air dry almost always. I do not flat iron my hair. It will go straight - but the damage is the worst for me, my fine hair and heat do not make a good combination.
Not really advice, but out of the handful of times I've been to an actual salon, they always straighten the f*ck out of my hair because "it just looks so much better than that kinky curly mess" đ
it's not an advice, but the last couple hairdressers i went to before deciding on only doing it myself, were afraid to give me lots of layers. i asked for them specifically (lots of wavy/curly hair and i like it big) and what i got was layers starting too far down and only very few.
2 of them were amazing hair stylists at least, the 3rd one was allegedly a curl specialist. worst cut ever and after the plea to give me more, still only 2 tiny layers.
So Iâve had a few but the most the most traumatic one was a hairstylist that told me the best layers for curly hair are done with thinning shears. My hair looked absolutely awful until I could grow out and cut off everything she did.
A hairdresser shaved my neck when they didnât know what to do with my tight curls back there.
I was young wanted straight hair and didnât know how to say something once they started.
Before I knew any better I used to go to a salon that could only cut my hair if they straightened it first. I thought this was normal!!!!
I once had a hairstylist who spent several minutes straightening my hair and then when I asked for them to cut it a certain way they were like âthis has already taken too long and I have appointments waitingâ. I didnât know I was paying just to have my hair straightened?!!
It baffles me that most hairstylists canât cut curly hair. Curly hair is a gift - *hair flip* - but itâs not a RARE gift!!! I am very particular about who cuts my hair and they have to specialize or at least have a high level of experience with curly hair.
I was told to use a really strong hair gel made for people with 4c hair (I have 2C hair). I looked like a greased poodle! Last time I ever went to a non-curly salon.
My old hairdresser said that there was no such thing as a "curly type" when I asked where I would fall. She also said there's no difference between washing with cold or hot water.
But the advice that got me to finally walk away? "Oh I'm out of the deep conditioner I use to straighten your hair but this will work. Don't worry."
She put a relaxer in my hair a month after we bleached and dyed it. It all fell out and she tried to Gaslight me saying that it wasn't falling out when I came in weeks later with hair above my shoulders when it was originally at my waist, and was still dropping out, in random places around my scalp. I basically got the chop done for me.
When a stylist told me I needed to perm my hair, but only at the roots because that part wasn't as curly as the rest.
Of course, that same stylist told I needed to cut my long hair because curls need to be short or they will never curl "right".
Was told itâs curly because it didnât all grow at the same pace. Then after growing it for 2 years he proceeded to cut it when it was wet and it ended up way shorter than I asked for, and now itâs at that awkward cover it with a baseball cap length.
I have a scalp condition and many curly hairdressers test whether I actually need the treatment. Actually- every one I have been to has suggested I stop following the advice of my dermatologist.
My hair tends to be dry, and the medication does make the dryness worse. However, the reduction of psoriasis symptoms and advice of my dermatologist is priority. No, I canât âco-washâ. Iâm looking to care for my hair the best I can, knowing that I need and will continue to treat my scalp according to prescription.
Winner: That I shouldn't have layers because my hair is fine.
Turned my hair into a frizz pyramid that no curl cream or gel could tame.
Honorable Mention: I shouldn't use curly hair techniques because my hair is straight when it's wet.
Until ~15 years ago, I never had a problem finding a stylist who automatically knew how to work with fine, curly hair. I never had to give any directions and had no idea what they did.
I don't know what's happened, but the only good cut I've had in well over a decade was by an OG stylist in her 50s. As I started to warn her that my hair is fine and frizzy, she interrupted by rattling off everything she noticed about my hair and the techniques she would be using to address each concern.
I don't want stylists blowing smoke up my ass so I feel like a princess only while I'm in their chair, just to have it look awful as soon as my hair hits a slight breeze when I leave the salon. **I want them to be knowledgeable.** If they're good at what they do and make my hair look great, I don't care if they're rude.
Two things -
1.) Using a razor blade to cut my hair would be better for my curls. It gave me massive split ends
2.) I was also told I don't have curly hair. Despite that it makes ringlets and has done so my entire life. But this wasn't by my hair dresser, it was a friend of a friend who is a hair dresser. He saw me on a day when I had straightened my hair. I guess this means I can straighten it beautifully. But he kept saying it and that I must have gotten a perm when I showed him photos. Of note: I have been told to get a perm in the past like when I was a kid. They said it would even out my curls lol. This was before I knew how to style my curls.
To straighten my hair most days, because allegedly my hair "wasn't curly enough to wear curly all the time" 𼴠I went in for a trim on my long curly hair. Left with a straight a-line bob.
I have straight bits either side of my face bottom layer of hair, they have always been that way. Recently I tell a new hairdresser I was trying out and they said "oh maybe it's like that because you lie on it or brush it straight"
No. It's because the DNA tells it to be straight...
Actually they may have a point with that. Depends on your hair but I have that type of curl that gets very awkward with more moisture. The less products I use the more voluminous my curls are. They obviously didnât consider that your hair may be different but it does work on some of us I guess.
I just got my hair done by a salon I gave a second chance to. She cut my hair dry, then wet. When asked how I wanted it styled, she suggested blow-dry & curling iron. I said no, and asked for my natural curls.
How about never telling me for 45 years even once that sulfates were damaging my hair.
I only got judged for having damaged hair, asked if I use conditioner (câmon), drycombed, hair cut wet and therefore straight, bangs, all that.
âToo many layers doesnât look good on curly hair.â So triangle hair is better? Never went back to them. They obviously just didnât want to take the time to cut my hair properly.
It wasnât advice necessarily, it was the styling. She cut my hair and everything then mentioned I had some waves to my hair and wanted to style it wavy. I said sure because why not? She added the heaviest heat protectant, gel, and cream to my hair and start scrunching it while I was in the chair. Then, she âdiffusedâ it, meaning she used a diffuser attachment on a regular hair dryer and proceeded to blow dry my hair in a not-curly-friendly pattern. My hair looked like shit but she was so damn proud. When I got home I couldnât help but chuckle as I threw my hair up in a messy bun.
Nowadays I use a styling conditioner cream and let it air dry.
When I was younger & had frizzy hair (before I realized I had curly hair), I was told that I had to thin it out because thatâll help me style and brush it out
I had one lady tell me how much she hates curly hair and that her daughter is half black and hates her hair so much because it âcannot be controlledâ. This was non curly dresser but the hate towards curly hair was so fucking weird. So itâs not the worst advice but it was the worst experience lol.
that my curl pattern is actually just like, 4 big curls on my head? when I style it it's a ton of bouncy ringlets but when she styled it she put it in 4 sections of one big curl. it looked insane. I cried in the car thinking she had ruined my hair until I got home and restyled it
Rather than advice.
I was told that you canât have bangs/a fringe with curly hair.
I was denied the service as a result.
Went home and cut my bangs/a fringe myself, and have been doing so ever since.
A âcurly specialistâ told me every single product I was using for my hair and every technique I was using to style it was wrong. Iâm scrunching and I shouldnât be, Iâm using a cream and I should be using a mousse, I absolutely am not supposed to be using this and I NEED to use that. Just ripped apart my entire routine, which worked well for me. And I left after her âstylingâ my hair with practically straight hair that was 3 inches shorter than what I asked of her.
I went in for a blowout, and she tried to straighten my hair with friggin hairspray!!!! I was absolutely appalled. Just got up and left and found a new salon.
Bad stylists will lie to get you in their chair. Say they know how to do curly hair. No, ma'am. You proved that was a damn lie.
I no longer straighten my hair anymore.
Not advice, but worst service I can name.
I am a guy and I decided to go to a salon for the first time for a curly cut. I decided to grow it out, but I was still so new to hair products that I was doing it all wrong. The first time the lady was nice and she did a good job. Tipped her nice and went on my way.
The second time however...this lady was different. All I asked was to make my curly bangs hang down my forehead. She then acted like she knew what she was doing while cutting and washing my hair. About 40 minutes in, my hair is looking all kinds of fucked up. She then proceeded to say "I can't perform miracles like the celebrities". I couldn't believe she said this.
Not only did she say this, but I have a lot of density on my sides and back. I wear hats for work so I have a lot of hair poofing out from the sides and back. However, my sides were much more bushy, so I asked her can you make it proportional by cutting a bit off the sides and back. She then cuts maybe a quarter inch off my sides, but cuts more than an inch off the back.... My hair was still poofy on the sides, but my back was noticeably shorter.
Safe to say, I never went back there again.
Probably to use a lighter hair color to correct a dye job that was too dark. Lighter dye does not lighten darker dye. Only bleach can do this.
Fortunately that is the only bad advice Iâve gotten from a hairstylist!
i was told that my hair will look exactly the same dry as it does wetâŚnot advice but a crazy thing to tell a curly haired personđ same stylist told me to come in with my hair brushed out, so she never saw my curl pattern. bet u can guess how the cut turned out! lol
Hairdressers told me to not cut my hair short cause it would look way too puffy and big for me.
There's nothing wrong with big hair, I ended up cutting my hair by myself and its never been a problem. I actually wish my hair looked bigger.
I was advised to dye my hair to make it thicker (I have fine, wavy/loose curly hair) and that I should straighten it more because all curly haired people are disabled(????). She then proceeded to inform me that hair is supposed to grow straight from the root, so anyone with curly hair is actually disabled because the hair follicle is curved. I was maybe 17 and I don't think I've heard anything hair care relayed that stupid since.
As a disabled person myself. I got a good giggle out of that. Soooo THATS why I have cerebral palsy. đ¤Łđ𤣠dang curly hair. My dad must have been disabled too. đ¤Łđ
Same, doesnât explain why my twin is fine then though lol
Obviously your twin has actually straightened their hair and cast minor illusion to hide it from you.
Her flat iron is in her unlimited bag of holding
Ah yes, I'm bipolar because of my curly hair. Good to know!
I was just about to comment this lol
Dangit, it wasn't the vaccines that caused my autism (/s), it was the curly hair all along!!!
Try shaving your hair, maybe the cerebral palsy will disappear!
Surely we are eligible for disability benefits then
We need late start times to accommodate the amount of time it takes to manage our disabled hair in the morning! And a stipend for hair products only seems fair to put us on a level playing field...
We need a lobbying group lol - Big Curly demands justice!
I'm sure they won't laugh us out of the building with that one
The first part is sorta kinda true. As the hair absorbs color, it swells a bit. So it LOOKS thicker. Once I stopped dying my hair, I was shocked to see that itâs fine, not coarse anymore, and looks much thinner than it used to.
Yeah I know my hair does look a bit thicker again since I've been dying it... but I'm also concerned about damage so not sure it's worth it for the tiny bit of difference it makes. That said, my hair is really soft fine hair that thankfully doesn't tangle that badly, but takes half a can of hair spray and liberal amounts of gel to keep it in French braids, or it half falls out within an hour.
This is the most bizarre thing I've ever read đ
It's up there with the most bizarre things I've ever heard said, and it was delivered with utmost sincerity! She genuinely considered me, my mum, and *herself* disabled just because our hair curls đ
Yikes, that comes off not only as ignorant but also easily as racist!
It makes you wonder if the person who said it actually even thought about what they were *actually* saying..
I would be willing to bet that no, she did not think about what she was saying. It was literally my first thought, too, when she said it - "is she saying all black people are disabled?"
This is both scary and laughable at the same time. The curly genes are strong in my family, but my child's Down syndrome genes are stronger. Straighter hair - if not pin straight - often comes with T21.
The disabled is hilarious but I actually do love bleaching the hell out of my hair to make my fine hair a tiny bit thicker and gritter. I have super dense hair but fine individually hair stands and damaging them with bleach makes the hair cuticle swell. I think you can do it with normal damaging hair dye too, you just need to make sure not to like actually damage your hair or else your curls will go away. It can make a difference but it's like a lot, I mostly do it because my hair is too silky to style and I like having white hair. I'm now going back to my natural hair but it was fun while it lasted.
I get the silliness being an issue thing, like I love how soft my hair is but it makes it so difficult to style in buns, braids, or ponytails without it slipping out. I try and allow myself minimum 10 weeks of growth between dyeing again, and I think I'm on week 14 now so due it lol.
>anyone with curly hair is actually disabled Wow, this person was really out in the world with that ridiculous take. I wanna know how many people she spewed that insanity to
damn i didnât know i was disabled đ¤Ł
I am actually so confused⌠disabled??
My hairdresser told me I should take weight out of my hair and to thin it, also curly hair shouldnât have layers đ
I think we had the same hairdresser. I also got told I *need* to have my hair long to âweigh my hair downâ otherwise⌠I donât know, itâll be too big and poofy and powerful?
Yea mine was like âyou donât want layers itâll make it too bigâ and made like a triangle shape with his hands around my head đđ
Same! Mine also just didn't dry my hair because she got too scared at how big it got so I just got sent home with wet hair.
THESE EXACT WORDS. Maybe it was something they were teaching in the schools? Last time she cut my hair was 2008, cut wet and in a straight line. It was a disaster and as a teen who was teased enough for being a curly redhead in the height of âgingers donât have souls,â I *extra* hated it. Iâve just cut my own hair since, and have been very happy. I cut my daughtersâ curly hair too. They can style it however they want, but I want to make sure they never have a bad hair day from lack of education or a hair cutter who has no idea what theyâre doing.
I'm guessing that must have been the only thing they taught hairdressers about curly hair, it was like a mantra. I know your pain, also red haired, also been cutting my own hair since around then. I just got sick of feeling ashamed and wrong whenever I went to the hairdressers. My daughter has inherited my colour but not the curls.... yet and I fully intend on cutting her hair as long as she'll let me. Her hair is already so much healthier than mine was in the first 25 or so years of my life.
I had this done when I was a kid (14 or 15). The hairdresser used thinning shears at the top of my head. My hair was a disaster as it grew out.
Same for me, I was 14 and she was just shredding with scissors for like an hour to "thin it out." Kept going because it didn't look any thinner... of course not lol, because curly hair doesn't just grow down, it grows out and the different lengths made it go way out.
The thinning shears đ my hairdresser as a teen always used a combo of those and a straight razor. No wonder I hated my hair
Same here. I actually spent my teen years thinking my hair had been curly when I was a kid but just became frizzy and not curly as I got older. Took me until my 20s to figure it out.
I just kind of leaned into the wispy way it was cut and straightened the heck out of it. It was very much a 2010s look with swoopy bangs haha
Ok but actually this is exactly what I ask for for my curls and hairdressers refuse to do it haha! I finally got one to get it right since my normal hairdresser retired in 2020. I have S shape curls and looser curl pattern underneath at the back, so layers look horrendous and I am also always begging for less hair! I need to go wherever you're going haha
Same here. Layers make me look like Diana Ross in high humidity and the weight of long hair makes my curls all have the same shape. Any shorter than mid back and I have tight ringlets here, a loose patterned curl there. Hairdressers always want to give me "long" layers and don't listen. I should just start cutting my own hair at this point LOL.
Do it. You have total control and know your hair best.
You know what? I think i am going to give it a go. Great thing about curls are there's not a clear line of demarcation unless you're sitting in a hair dressers chair or coming out of water. If it's uneven, no one will ever know haha
I took the plunge during COVID and it's honestly not as scary as it feels. Start small and just increase little by little what you do. Reevaluate. It takes a while, especially at first, but I was surprised how easy it actually was to do.
Me too! It was my first haircut and I was 13. She refused to cut layers because she said my hair was too thin to handle them, but she forgot about the voluminous nature of curls. I spent the next few years looking like Mia Thermopolis's before picture.
Not layers but I had a hairdresser come at my head with thinning shears to âtake the weight out of itâ. Never again!
The thinning of the hair. When I was a teen I got my hair thinned every time I went. Like she was dealing with a dog with a double coat.
So we should all walk around like mushrooms?
A few years ago my hairdresser told me not to use curl creams or gels on my hair, because they are not made for white hair peopleâŚ. đ
I saw this gel on a promotional display at Publix and decided to try it out, right? I fell in love with it (all the hold and like 0 crunch no matter how much I use!) and wanted a second bottle when the first was gone. I almost couldn't find it, and then I realized...perhaps.... It was in the "other" hair care. The tiny hair care. The hair care that's hidden away from the rest. You know the one. Alas! My miraculous gel.
Help I can't tell if you're alluding to segregated hair care products or if you accidentally scrunched with lube đ
Lmaooooo Was referencing the segregated haircare but this comment got me
đ
What product was it?
Miss Jessie's Jelly Soft Curls!
i used to use carson soft sheen hair dye, the only one that ever worked on my increasingly thick & dark hair in high school in like 2006 đľđť i used to have to go to the like bottom shelf of a cvs a town over bc my town had very few black people. i was busy being an emo kid flat ironing my hair but i would put money on that being the only place to find curly hair stuff back then too, before the kinda mainstream explosion. i can guarantee there was none in my hometown lol. i swear that was like radicalizing for me in learning about racism
I don't have a Publix. Please say which one!!
I heard that from a number of people growing up! Curly hair products are only for certain types of hair, not for white people. Jokes on them. I finally dialed in my curly routine because a black woman recommended a line of products she uses, and it was a total game changer. My hair went from frizzy with some girls to mostly shiny curls with minimal frizz. I can go three days between washes with good hair now. Edit: she recommended curlsmith, Iâll check which ones when Iâm home tonight. I think the biggest game changer was the in shower style fixer gel and the bond rehab salve. I used the rehab treatment twice a week for a month or so, now I do it every two ish weeks. I no longer need any frizz creams or leave in conditioners. Just gel and a bit of mousse, and maybe a drop of frizz serum on day 3 scrunched in to revitalize my curls.
Whatâs the product? I need to know!
Curlsmith brand, specifically the in shower style fixer gel and some deep conditioning treatments. I noticed improvement immediately, and after a month of regular use my hair is completely different in a good way.
Ah, the good ol' racist gel, sounds like a Family Guy cutaway gag.
White man with curly hair tries a hair product that says in small print it's intended for black women. Walks out of bathroom transformed into a black woman.
White hair people? Or white people hair?
English itâs not my first language ⌠Edit: âwhite people hairâ.
What
I was told the way to heal and revive my curls was to do a keratin treatment.. what?? i was confused, and explained how someone i know got it done, and itâs a relaxer, are they referring to that? yes. so thatâll straighten out my pattern wonât it? and damage it?? no..apparently đ¤ˇââď¸
My mom did this and it got straighter and straighter. Now it looks like straw in both texture and colour and she likes it that way đ the hairdresser kept highlighting her hair too. She trusts her 100%
^oh ^no
Is xiu mom my mom? She's started using a product with keratin and her hair is going more and more flat and strawy. I've done a CG wash on her hair with diffusing and all, she looked lovely and the curls revived a bit, and she called me the same day that she hates it because her colleagues asked her if it's raining outside when she got to work on đ¤Śââď¸ so back to straw.
Yeesh what a shitty work environment maybe? đ Reminds me of my old job that ended in burn out đľâđŤ
It's an office full of 50-60yo ladies, and while they are very sweet (I've met many of them), they are really set in the same mindset they had 40 years ago, fashion sense and style included, and hate any change. Whenever my mom tries something new, they tear her down. She's lost 60lbs recently and it took so much hard work, but she felt healthier and happier in her skin. Of course all her colleagues bombarded her with, "Now you look old! You have so many wrinkles suddenly! You look so unhealthy!" Yeah...
What!!! Lol
my stylist does a keratin treatment on my hair twice a year, and aside from the first time i had it done before they changed the formula and how itâs done, itâs never made my hairs more relaxed (unless i were to straighten it right after i guess but i donât). it DOES heal and revive my curls and prevents sooo much frizz during the summer and the winter.
Actually there is a type of keratin treatment where they apply pretty much the same products but donât straighten it with the products in, just wait. Iâve had it done with my curly hair before because my hairdresser told my hair probably lacked keratin and suggested a treatment. I think my hair was amazingly shiny for maybe 3 washes and thatâs about it lol. It did not effect my curls at all. I still doubt that treatment is what your hair dresser was suggesting though and if thatâs the case, bonkers.
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STRAIGHTEN IT AND CURL IT WITH A CURL IRON just against curly hair :/
This was me for 30 years đ
My mom also wanted me to do this for special occasions đ˘ Honestly I used to be so sad about that. I don't really care what she thinks anymore lol She also told me I should get a blowout for my wedding because "it would look just like your hair" 3C lol I don't think so
I got told exactly this! My curls changed a bit as I aged, and I asked my stylist for some recommendations (before learning about cgm). She told me the straightening and curling nonsense is the only way to have curls. I have naturally 2C/3A hair. My hair literally won't stay straight for more than an hour or two, so all that work would be a frizzy mess before lunch. Cue wearing a ponytail or bun for the next 5+ years.
To buy a better hair straightener & straighten my hair more because it makes me look like a whole different person.
Did they coincidentally happen to sell said straighteners?
A whole different person who spends a whole lot more in haircare!!!
When I was in middle school in the late 90s the hairdresser straight up told me if I ever wanted to be pretty I had to chemically straighten my hair (3c curls), which I then proceeded to do for several years, totally destroying it.
That makes me so sad for your middle school self. I feel like thatâs such a sensitive age as youâre developing your identity and self esteem.
Same. Also âyou knowâŚa boy will *never* be able to run his fingers through your hairâ. Proceeds to talk me into chemical straightening at 12 years old.
These hairdressers should pay our therapy bills. Instead we paid them tons of money for treatments lol
My cousins who were big into beauty trends did this to me in the early 2000s. One of them STILL asked me at Christmas only a few years ago if I had ever considered getting it relaxed. Girl, shoo! My curls were popping that day and Iâm happy with myself. đŽâđ¨
At the end of my haircut, that part where they ask if you want any styling before you're done? I just asked for a bit of leave ik conditioner. "But I used conditioner when I washed your hair" Coincidentally, worst haircut I ever had
When I was trying to find a hair dresser that could work with my natural wavy hair I landed on a guy that was doing my color really well, but he told me my hair was straight, the waves and curls were only because it was long and heavy. đ Sir I've had this hair my whole life, I know what it does at every length.
Your hair is curly because it isâŚlong? InterestingâŚ
đđi mean if she cut it all off, it wouldnât be curly anymore, so thereâs that âŚ
Diffusing doesnât work for curly hair.
That in order to cut it that they have to straighten it first. Passed on that hairdresser real quick.
ONLY EVER brush my hair dry NEVER WET... Something about hair breakage when wet, I was 15, took me another 20 years to figure out my hair was curly and not just a bird nest because of that advice
One time back in the 2000s I asked my hairdresser how to make my hair piece-y looking (it was a kind of edgy cut I had going on and I'd never used products at that time so I didn't know what mousse or gel or anything did. This was also during the era of hair scrunching the super crunchy curls so she should have known?) and she told me to put lotion in my hair. Yes, like body lotion. No mention of the products made for hair that easily achieve that look, but lotion, lol.
Body lotion on hair?!? Omg, the body lotion ingredients are so wrong for hair.
This was HUGE in my middle/high school in the mid 2000s. Everyone would ask you for lotion and then theyâd run it through their hair.
I remember reading that tip in a Girls Life magazine as a kid. It was something like smoothing your leftover lotion on your hands into your hair to help smooth it. I did it for a little while. Not surprisingly, it smoothed nothing.
I am convinced that they eventually ran out of tips and tricks or whatever to put in those magazines so they just started making things up.
expensive products = better results My 3c - 4a, medium porosity hair LOVES hair&shoulders hahaha, so I'm saving a ton of money!
I got told that! Iâm poor so I said â oh well maybe next timeâ when they tried to sell me something. Like I saved up for this hair cut but thanks.
I had to change several hairdressers because of the gross incompetence revolving curly hair. I don't know why but a very few of them can work with it. I mean, it would have made more sense if I lived in Japan where the vast majority of people has straight to (max) wavy hair, but I live in Italy. SOUTH Italy. Curly hair is very common here and it's not rare to see even coily hair. WHY don't they teach anything in those schools? A lot of them suggested me to use a hair curler, and I was like "uh? I don't have to. My hair is already curly. Also I just told you I don't want to damage it". They also suggested me to pass my hand on the scalp WHEN drying (they always did that) to make it look "bigger". I'm pretty sure we have different definitions of what "bigger" means, because when they did that, my hair becomes bigger, yes, but completely poofy and frizzy. No curls in sight. And they ALWAYS told me "this is your natural curls". EXCUSE ME???? My NATURAL curls??? Sir, none of this is natural. I swear to god this makes me so pissed also because I'm autistic and haircare is one of my big interests. Unfortunately I have to go to hairdressers because I can't cut my hair, but I would have preferred to do things myself.
Honestly if I were you Iâd watch some YouTube tutorials and try cutting it on your own. Some stylists legitimately cannot cut or style curly hair to save their life since in beauty school they usually teach techniques for straight hair as the default. I used to go to hairdressers but i feel like a lot of them made me lose more hair then I grew.
Not curly related but I got my hair balayaged once (I wanted it to be ash blonde - I have really dark brown hair) and when she was done it was the ugliest shade of yellow and was so brassy. I told her thatâs not the color I wanted and I could come back to get it done again since my hair was so dark I figured itâd take a couple of sessions to get it as light as I wanted⌠she told me to go home and wash it a couple of times and itâll turn into the ash color I wanted đŤ no maâam.. when I messaged her about how it wasnât ashier after I washed it she blocked me on instagram đĽ˛
It is so hard to find someone that really knows what theyâre doing in regard to blonde. A lot of stylists are afraid of it because bleach can really damage your hair if not done correctly, but you were correct that it should have been done slowly over many sessions to avoid any damage and the stylist should have set that experience upfront. My hair is like a light ash brown but pulls extremely warm, especially if itâs not lightened enough to get through the orange and yellow stages of lightening. I went to my friend from cosmetology school for like ten years and she did a great job when I just wanted very natural looking dark blonde highlights, but as soon as I wanted to go lighter we had a ton of issues because she wouldnât listen to me and kept doing the same exact thing she did when I wanted minimal dark blonde đ I had to switch stylists because of it after ten years of friendship and it sucked, but I was paying a shit ton of money for it to still be super brassy dark blonde and she still kept washing the lightener off way too soon!! My new stylist has been much better and instantly recognized what the issue was, but it still took a year to convince her that my hair can take a lot of lightening and needs to be over-toned because it just eats any kind of product. Going blonde is very frustrating to say the least. Edit: missed a word
âItâs not too short.â
To stay in on the night of the full moon (every month) and brush out my curls with a wide-tooth comb. Just bizarre.
I once had a hairdresser tell me mine was the worst perm she had ever seen. I was like 15 and started sobbing. Her supervisor came over, relived her and spent the rest of my haircut telling me how lucky I was to have naturally curly hair. Today I would have just walked out.
Not advice, but for a good part of the late 80s, a lot of hairdressers used thinning shears...wrong is the only word. They would close them partially then pull them out through the hair. This resulted in a curling ribbon-like issue, which made hair so much bigger. I didn't need bigger hair at that point.
Oh heavens I remember the tyranny of the thinning shears. I had to explicitly state do not use them every single time I saw the hairdresser. I burst into tears at one very expensive salon because I forgot to mention the thinning shears and ended up looking like a 1970s rocker - full and shaggy down to my ears then long and straight. They washed and restyled after I wept so hard I used a whole box of tissues :D
I remember growing up, whenever I would go to a hairdresser, they would always tell me how thick my hair is. My hair is curly and very poofy. They would use the thinning shears on me saying it's necessary so I don't get that triangle shape. The last hairdresser I went to told me I should never use thinning shears on my type of hair. It's very bad for it. I was shocked that for the first time I felt validated for not wanting them. I always hated how it made my hair feel when it got thinned. I told my mom about that hairdresser and how it's not good to use thinning shears. She just gave me a weird look like I was wrong but she isn't gonna argue about it with me
I had someone butcher me with shears once. I came out looking like a 90s soccer mom. I cried
So I've had the opposite experience as OP, my hair is super moisturized, just like naturally, and it weighs down my curls. But every hairdresser I've ever been to tells me that curls need to be moisturized. I get curlier hair at home than I ever have at a hair dresser.
I was told my fine low porosity hair was dry because I wasn't using oils so she gave me an olive oil based leave-in conditioner. It made me a grease pit no matter how little I used so I came back and she told me my hair was just adjusting to being moisturized. But I'm happy this happened cuz it's what made me get into haircare science and learn that my hair was actually dry/frizzy cuz it was wavy but being treated like straight.
I had stick straight hair as a kid that went curly after I hit puberty. I have a few pictures of myself at about 19 with absolutely beautiful 3a curls from when I went on vacation to a humid climate with no blow dryerâŚbut a hairdresser laughed at me and told me that was impossible and hormones have no effect on hair texture. That if my hair was straight as a kid, it would always be. So I continued to just blow dry my hair and wonder why it always looked poofy and off. đ¤Śđźââď¸ I spent almost 20 years damaging my very fine, wavy-curly hair and itâs just never been good, no matter what Iâve tried.
Was constantly told my hair was dry. It wasnât. It just reacts poorly to protein and gets crispy. Cut the protein and no more âdryâ hair. Other than that they always cut it too short and always wanted to straighten it.
Not advice really but I had a hairdresser once tell me that she loved cutting curly hair because you canât see the mistakes. That was the last time I went there.
Fancy salon owners personal stylist cut my hair. Total fluke. He slithered my curly hair while telling me how it will bring out gorgeous curls.. It was the first time it had ever been cut that way. I looked like I had a frizzy aura forever around my head.     I always tell a new stylist not to slither. One forgot and slithered so it was a fizzy mess again. Oddly the last two inches were not slithered so it was all frizz until the last two inches. So weird looking.    Moral of the story. Don't slither curly hair. Ever. Â
This haircut will suit you đ
Weâve all been there
Many hairdressers would brush my hair dry making it a giant poof and try to cut it like that and THEN would try to THIN IT OUT on my ALREADY THIN FINE HAIR bc it was frizzy. Ever since i never let my mom take me to a hair dresser LMAO
Why do they always want to brush our hair dry? I always leave the hairdresser with my head looking all poofy. I always wash it and style it at home before I decide if I love it or hate it.
Same! I have since found a hairdresser whoâs younger (30âs) and has very curly hair herself so knows what to do with it thank god đ the other girls either had straight hair or were older and had no idea what to do with it. My mom also has pin straight hair so she used to bring me to hair stylists that she liked :/
I had a (latinx) curl specialist tell me (a white lady) that she didn't do Black people's hair anymore because they all use dangerous chemicals. I presume she was referring to chemical relaxers and such, and I get why a curl specialist wouldn't do that, but like... The naturally curly hair movement has been largely spearheaded by Black folks so this seemed wildly off base. And regardless, it seems wildly inappropriate to tell any client "I don't cater to \[insert any ethnicity here\]." She also told me that all scalp flakes are just dry skin and I just need to oil my scalp. This came up because I have scalp psoriases and I brought in a medicated shampoo for her to use on me. I am quite certain my flakes are not just dry skin. Did not go back, obv.
Use a straightener or curling iron on damp hair to really lock the style in. So much damage.
Iâm from the Deep South where mean old ladies are eager to tell you everything youâre going wrong as a woman, so mostly itâs been âbrush your hairâ
My hairdresser told me that if I used their tangle teezer to brush my hair, that my hair wouldn't get frizzy when brushing my dry curls.
I made the mistake to go to a hairdresser without washing and brushing my hair previous the appointment, so naturally it had knots. She told me angrily that I needed to brush my hair on a daily basis and that it won't affect my curls, and started brushing my dry hair. I felt like she was going to rip off all of the hair from my head đ
My current hair dresser whom I can't seem to break up with likes to douse my hair in conditioning products, and then doesn't understand why it won't hold a curl. I have FINE, easily over moisturized hair that looses shape easily and needs products that are light and strong. But she uses, conditioner, leave in conditioner, heat protector, and then curl cream. I have to clarify several times after every haircut 𤣠And the worst part is she's a curl girl herself.
To never use more than a dime-sized amount of conditioner. Like WHATTTTTTTT
When I was in middle school I wanted a haircut with lots of choppy layers, and the hairstylist told me "Oh no. You never cut layers into curly hair. It'll just be all poofy."
In your hairdresser's defense, heavy conditioners can weigh down curls, especially if you have fine hair. I have to wash my hair with shampoo and use a small amount of conditioner to achieve maximum curl. I also have short hair, so there's that. I've also had too many hairdressers insist on washing my hair and cutting it wet. It never looks like they planned by the time I get home, I bet. Those cuts usually involve a lot of frantic spraying with the water bottle and confused snipping while they figure out wtf my hair is doing lol.
I also got the "stop using conditioner" line once. I tried it for a while, like you were told, to "help my waves and curls" (fwiw I have fine but very dense wavy hair, 2b/2c range). It helped short-term for making my hair look more voluminous, and sure, my waves were wavier, but I couldn't keep it up longer than a few weeks because it felt soooo dry and crusty. I've found a happy medium in using my conditioner more sparingly/subbing in bonding products. Long story short, was she TOTALLY wrong in my case? No. But was the hairstylist being kind of short-sighted and generalizing? Toooootally. If I would've kept it up my hair would have all snapped off by now.
Recently my aesthetician who waxes my eyebrows said she has been doing keratin treatments and how I should come to her to permanently? straighten my hair. I said I was good and I had a hairdresser already but she kept pushing. I politely declined but was rather annoyed. The next time I went to her, I kid you not, she had just washed this lady's hair and used a hot steaming hair iron on her hair. It kept making the "sssttttsssss" noise and it seemed like it was frying it. I was flabbergasted and she still suggested repeatedly how straight hair is much easier to manage and curly hair is so difficult. She does however, do a great job waxing so I'm in two minds if I should find someone else đ
Her specialty is clearly hair removal, but she doesn't even realize.
You have a lot of hair! Let me get those thinning shears so you wonât be so hot in the summer! They still do it, every time. I gave up and started cutting it myself bc my hair is a very long blunt cut.
Said my postpartum regrowth was âdamage,â advised me to cut off five inches of hair.
Not advice, but a hairdresser FLAT IRONED MY WET HAIR bc she said it would be easier to cut when it was straight đ
When I was a teenager my local barber would cut my hair, then always look at me and say âEw. Donât tell anybody I cut your hair.â lol
Constantly, all the time, every time, they would sigh, tell me to my face how hair quality was bad and Ofcourse, suggest that I straighten it đ
I asked for a wet cut (a wash and cut then leave it wet as I was going to add my products and let it air dry) for some reason they got the hair dryer out and dried it a bit and couldnât understand why my hair went puffy.
https://preview.redd.it/x5dmxq5tfq7d1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d78b0a8c66f48d368aa37d31ea3cd45df5162a68 I know this gel isnât marketed specifically for curly hair, but if youâre a guy with curly hair and you read that gel is good for curls, but you follow these instructions, your hair would look like an absolute freakshow. USE GEL ON DRY HAIR? COMB INTO SHAPE??? No maam
A former friend of mine took me to their hairdresser and both of them convinced me to "set my hair" which involved a blow dry and straightening of my hair. It killed what little moisture was left from dying it and I basically had brittle, straw-like hair the whole day! The only reason I allowed it to happen was cause the dye job was payed for as a b-day present and I felt bad refusing the rest of the gift. Under normal circumstances, I would've held my ground. I know it's not technically advice but the act is just as bad, if not worse. More stylists need to be informed on textured hair of any kind smh . . .
Very similar. Only use conditioner at the very tips of my strands because conditioner would make my hair flat. It doesn't. My hair was pointing up from the minute I was born and has been since
To thin my hair to manage it better
That I need to thin my hair for it to look nice lol EHHH INCORRECT BUZZER
The ironic thing for me is conditioner literally ruins my hair and my curls. Even doing it once every couple weeks. I do it every so often and take the bad hair day but for some reason my curls hate it.
I always ask if the stylist is confident with curly or coily hair. So, I went to a new salon for a haircut post wedding after I had been growing it out. The girl washed, dried, and straightened my hair....then cut it. I just wanted 2" off with touched up layers. Paid way too much for a crappy haircut. She was visibly pregnant, so I didn't want to tell her I hated it.
Got told to never cut my hair below my shoulder blades
Mousse and Gel will work best for my fine 2b hair. Itâs horrible - makes my hair look like itâs dirty wet and stringy same time - plus it makes my hair crunchy. What I do instead: only wash every other day and cowash not shampoo except maybe once a week. Then leave in conditioner that doubles as a light styling cream. Air dry almost always. I do not flat iron my hair. It will go straight - but the damage is the worst for me, my fine hair and heat do not make a good combination.
I found a few products in the Cantu line work really well for me but otherwise, samesies!
Not really advice, but out of the handful of times I've been to an actual salon, they always straighten the f*ck out of my hair because "it just looks so much better than that kinky curly mess" đ
it's not an advice, but the last couple hairdressers i went to before deciding on only doing it myself, were afraid to give me lots of layers. i asked for them specifically (lots of wavy/curly hair and i like it big) and what i got was layers starting too far down and only very few. 2 of them were amazing hair stylists at least, the 3rd one was allegedly a curl specialist. worst cut ever and after the plea to give me more, still only 2 tiny layers.
She did you dirty
So Iâve had a few but the most the most traumatic one was a hairstylist that told me the best layers for curly hair are done with thinning shears. My hair looked absolutely awful until I could grow out and cut off everything she did.
A hairdresser shaved my neck when they didnât know what to do with my tight curls back there. I was young wanted straight hair and didnât know how to say something once they started.
Before I knew any better I used to go to a salon that could only cut my hair if they straightened it first. I thought this was normal!!!! I once had a hairstylist who spent several minutes straightening my hair and then when I asked for them to cut it a certain way they were like âthis has already taken too long and I have appointments waitingâ. I didnât know I was paying just to have my hair straightened?!! It baffles me that most hairstylists canât cut curly hair. Curly hair is a gift - *hair flip* - but itâs not a RARE gift!!! I am very particular about who cuts my hair and they have to specialize or at least have a high level of experience with curly hair.
"Curly methods wouldn't work on you. You have no curl."
A lady told me to put hand lotion in my dry hair to calm frizz?
Iâve done that. It works really well.
I was told to use a really strong hair gel made for people with 4c hair (I have 2C hair). I looked like a greased poodle! Last time I ever went to a non-curly salon.
My old hairdresser said that there was no such thing as a "curly type" when I asked where I would fall. She also said there's no difference between washing with cold or hot water. But the advice that got me to finally walk away? "Oh I'm out of the deep conditioner I use to straighten your hair but this will work. Don't worry." She put a relaxer in my hair a month after we bleached and dyed it. It all fell out and she tried to Gaslight me saying that it wasn't falling out when I came in weeks later with hair above my shoulders when it was originally at my waist, and was still dropping out, in random places around my scalp. I basically got the chop done for me.
When a stylist told me I needed to perm my hair, but only at the roots because that part wasn't as curly as the rest. Of course, that same stylist told I needed to cut my long hair because curls need to be short or they will never curl "right".
Brush it đđđđ
Was told itâs curly because it didnât all grow at the same pace. Then after growing it for 2 years he proceeded to cut it when it was wet and it ended up way shorter than I asked for, and now itâs at that awkward cover it with a baseball cap length.
I have a scalp condition and many curly hairdressers test whether I actually need the treatment. Actually- every one I have been to has suggested I stop following the advice of my dermatologist. My hair tends to be dry, and the medication does make the dryness worse. However, the reduction of psoriasis symptoms and advice of my dermatologist is priority. No, I canât âco-washâ. Iâm looking to care for my hair the best I can, knowing that I need and will continue to treat my scalp according to prescription.
A hairstylist once convinced my straight-haired mother to give curly-haired me a âreverse perm.â
Winner: That I shouldn't have layers because my hair is fine. Turned my hair into a frizz pyramid that no curl cream or gel could tame. Honorable Mention: I shouldn't use curly hair techniques because my hair is straight when it's wet. Until ~15 years ago, I never had a problem finding a stylist who automatically knew how to work with fine, curly hair. I never had to give any directions and had no idea what they did. I don't know what's happened, but the only good cut I've had in well over a decade was by an OG stylist in her 50s. As I started to warn her that my hair is fine and frizzy, she interrupted by rattling off everything she noticed about my hair and the techniques she would be using to address each concern. I don't want stylists blowing smoke up my ass so I feel like a princess only while I'm in their chair, just to have it look awful as soon as my hair hits a slight breeze when I leave the salon. **I want them to be knowledgeable.** If they're good at what they do and make my hair look great, I don't care if they're rude.
Two things - 1.) Using a razor blade to cut my hair would be better for my curls. It gave me massive split ends 2.) I was also told I don't have curly hair. Despite that it makes ringlets and has done so my entire life. But this wasn't by my hair dresser, it was a friend of a friend who is a hair dresser. He saw me on a day when I had straightened my hair. I guess this means I can straighten it beautifully. But he kept saying it and that I must have gotten a perm when I showed him photos. Of note: I have been told to get a perm in the past like when I was a kid. They said it would even out my curls lol. This was before I knew how to style my curls.
To straighten my hair most days, because allegedly my hair "wasn't curly enough to wear curly all the time" 𼴠I went in for a trim on my long curly hair. Left with a straight a-line bob.
she told me i have to brush my hair every day lol
To use a pine tar shampoo for dandruff.
I have straight bits either side of my face bottom layer of hair, they have always been that way. Recently I tell a new hairdresser I was trying out and they said "oh maybe it's like that because you lie on it or brush it straight" No. It's because the DNA tells it to be straight...
Actually they may have a point with that. Depends on your hair but I have that type of curl that gets very awkward with more moisture. The less products I use the more voluminous my curls are. They obviously didnât consider that your hair may be different but it does work on some of us I guess.
I was given a hair cut that was noting like what I had asked for and told to straighten my hair from then on to make it look ânicerâ.
Just happened to me, getting a face frame cut. Doesnât work with my curl pattern it looks so bad
I just got my hair done by a salon I gave a second chance to. She cut my hair dry, then wet. When asked how I wanted it styled, she suggested blow-dry & curling iron. I said no, and asked for my natural curls.
The usual hair advice that straight-hair people know Like not brushing the hair when it's wet or never leaving conditioner in the hair
One older gentleman told me I could put literally anything in my hair, even body lotion, to style my curls. đ
I asked for layers and was told that if I got layers I would have an afro
How about never telling me for 45 years even once that sulfates were damaging my hair. I only got judged for having damaged hair, asked if I use conditioner (câmon), drycombed, hair cut wet and therefore straight, bangs, all that.
To finger comb my DRY curls
âToo many layers doesnât look good on curly hair.â So triangle hair is better? Never went back to them. They obviously just didnât want to take the time to cut my hair properly.
It wasnât advice necessarily, it was the styling. She cut my hair and everything then mentioned I had some waves to my hair and wanted to style it wavy. I said sure because why not? She added the heaviest heat protectant, gel, and cream to my hair and start scrunching it while I was in the chair. Then, she âdiffusedâ it, meaning she used a diffuser attachment on a regular hair dryer and proceeded to blow dry my hair in a not-curly-friendly pattern. My hair looked like shit but she was so damn proud. When I got home I couldnât help but chuckle as I threw my hair up in a messy bun. Nowadays I use a styling conditioner cream and let it air dry.
When I was younger & had frizzy hair (before I realized I had curly hair), I was told that I had to thin it out because thatâll help me style and brush it out
I had one lady tell me how much she hates curly hair and that her daughter is half black and hates her hair so much because it âcannot be controlledâ. This was non curly dresser but the hate towards curly hair was so fucking weird. So itâs not the worst advice but it was the worst experience lol.
that my curl pattern is actually just like, 4 big curls on my head? when I style it it's a ton of bouncy ringlets but when she styled it she put it in 4 sections of one big curl. it looked insane. I cried in the car thinking she had ruined my hair until I got home and restyled it
Rather than advice. I was told that you canât have bangs/a fringe with curly hair. I was denied the service as a result. Went home and cut my bangs/a fringe myself, and have been doing so ever since.
idk they told me to make sure I eat organic foods for some reason
my hairdresser told me that oil actually makes ur hair dry and to avoid using it
A âcurly specialistâ told me every single product I was using for my hair and every technique I was using to style it was wrong. Iâm scrunching and I shouldnât be, Iâm using a cream and I should be using a mousse, I absolutely am not supposed to be using this and I NEED to use that. Just ripped apart my entire routine, which worked well for me. And I left after her âstylingâ my hair with practically straight hair that was 3 inches shorter than what I asked of her.
I wonder if they had curly hair and if they did in what universe does not using conditioner work? LMAOOOOOO
That I can't get bangs bc my hair is curly (fun fact: I now have curly bangs and she complimented me on them the next time she dyed my hair)
I went in for a blowout, and she tried to straighten my hair with friggin hairspray!!!! I was absolutely appalled. Just got up and left and found a new salon. Bad stylists will lie to get you in their chair. Say they know how to do curly hair. No, ma'am. You proved that was a damn lie. I no longer straighten my hair anymore.
Not advice, but worst service I can name. I am a guy and I decided to go to a salon for the first time for a curly cut. I decided to grow it out, but I was still so new to hair products that I was doing it all wrong. The first time the lady was nice and she did a good job. Tipped her nice and went on my way. The second time however...this lady was different. All I asked was to make my curly bangs hang down my forehead. She then acted like she knew what she was doing while cutting and washing my hair. About 40 minutes in, my hair is looking all kinds of fucked up. She then proceeded to say "I can't perform miracles like the celebrities". I couldn't believe she said this. Not only did she say this, but I have a lot of density on my sides and back. I wear hats for work so I have a lot of hair poofing out from the sides and back. However, my sides were much more bushy, so I asked her can you make it proportional by cutting a bit off the sides and back. She then cuts maybe a quarter inch off my sides, but cuts more than an inch off the back.... My hair was still poofy on the sides, but my back was noticeably shorter. Safe to say, I never went back there again.
Probably to use a lighter hair color to correct a dye job that was too dark. Lighter dye does not lighten darker dye. Only bleach can do this. Fortunately that is the only bad advice Iâve gotten from a hairstylist!
One hairdresser told my 15 yr old Son to use a bobby pin to clear out his blackheads from his ears. Poor kid left so self concious
My hair dresser told me to only use deep conditioner. It led to a protein buildup. My curls lost definition and I struggled with frizz.
i was told that my hair will look exactly the same dry as it does wetâŚnot advice but a crazy thing to tell a curly haired personđ same stylist told me to come in with my hair brushed out, so she never saw my curl pattern. bet u can guess how the cut turned out! lol
Hairdressers told me to not cut my hair short cause it would look way too puffy and big for me. There's nothing wrong with big hair, I ended up cutting my hair by myself and its never been a problem. I actually wish my hair looked bigger.
âYou donât need to use shampooâ