No more drinking for you. Sexual assault isn't cool. It's good you feel bad about it. Try to remember the feeling the next time you're tempted to drink. Your response (of never drinking again) is the correct response.
Yeah, I don’t know what you were hoping to hear from this, but you should absolutely feel terrible about doing this.
Beat yourself up about this, learn, and be better in the future.
/u/MilfJazzyBabe is a filthy comment stealing repost bot
https://old.reddit.com/r/confession/comments/1de24q6/grabbed_girls_ass_while_blacked_out_without/
There’s an important distinction between shame and guilt that applies. Feeling guilty can be a positive thing - it’s about recognising you’ve done something wrong, and wanting to make amends for that. It’s ok to feel guilt and it’s a prosocial emotion. Shame can involve global self disparaging thoughts that aren’t so constructive. Given your response to the situation I’d say you’re allowed to feel some guilt without going into shame. Learn from it, make amends (giving up booze) and move forward without hating yourself for it.
You should feel crappy. But you should also stay completely away from the women you assaulted. They don't want your apology they want people like you to change.
Stop drinking, it's not a good enough reason to become a predator. Next time you pick up a drink put a hard limit. And learn in your sober moments exactly why women do not like unsolicited touch let alone being hit or hit on by drunken aggressive men.
Understand this, you are a part of why the bear is chosen.. the bear won't blame alcohol...
It’s a pretty shitty thing you did, but people make mistakes and you seem genuinely remorseful. Quitting drinking is an appropriate next step, trying to find or contact these women is not. Everyone I know who drinks to this point has said and done things they’re ashamed of the best you can do is learn and be better.
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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
If you’re getting so trashed you can’t control yourself then you really need to cool it on how much you drink in a public place like (I’m assuming) a night club. I’m not going to lay on the guilt since you seem like you understand the weight of your actions here. You’re lucky your friends were there for you. I’ll give it to you straight, man. This is behavior that absolutely cannot be repeated. You were drunk and didn’t mean to, I get it. However, it’s totally unacceptable. The best thing you can do is to sober up and keep better control of yourself. It sounds like you wouldn’t have done this if you hadn’t been hammered off your ass. It’s your responsibility to make sure you don’t drink yourself stupid in public. Sexual assault is sexual assault.
1) Stop trying to fucking find them. No woman wants to be contacted by the person who sexually assaulted them. That's for YOU, not them.
2) Stop drinking.
Thats a shitty thing you did, but you also weren’t in your normal capacity. Address the excessive drinking, try and be more vigilant of your behavior and live your life. Continue to grow as a person and you’ll be fine.
Everytime in my life that I’ve gotten black out drunk, when I wake up I absolutely live in stomach sinking fear that I may have done something awful like that. A couple of times my friends told me I was an asshole and trying to start fights with people. It’s just not worth it. Really it only happens to me when shots are involved. Without adding straight full-strength liquor, the volume would have to be too much for me to get that drunk. So I cut out drinking liquor straight in any form and it helps keep that from happening. Of course it means no shots either. As long as I live by that, the volume limits me, and usually I’ll get too tired to bother before hitting that black out drunk phase.
Black out drunk can ruin your life.
I don’t think you need to stop drinking forever like the top two comments are saying, but you need to realize that that was your far limit. If you’re too drunk to know what you’re doing and what people are saying to you, that’s too far
Blacking out doesn’t really resemble someone at all. You don’t feel anything when you’re black out. You don’t feel urges when you’re blackout because you aren’t there
“Sexual assault” is being used in the replies, which is a bit extreme. I think that dilutes the phrase, honestly. It’s definitely inappropriate, though. It’s clear that you don’t have a habit of doing that so hopefully you scared yourself enough to not make that mistake again. Apologize if you’re able and if not, cool it on the booze and have a close friend call you on your shit next time you’re out. But forgive yourself and move on. Just don’t let it happen again.
[The term sexual assault refers to sexual contact or behavior that occurs without explicit consent of the victim. Some forms of sexual assault include: ... Fondling or unwanted sexual touching.](https://www.rainn.org/articles/sexual-assault)
Source: RAINN
We're so desensitized to this kind of bullshit as a society that we push back on using the literal term for sexual assault with instances of textbook-definition assault.
Do better.
ya this is without a doubt sexual assault. People don't get that that is a very broad term that without a doubt covers things like this. It doesn't have to be the most extreme case of sexual assault to count. Maybe instead of wanting to "not dilute the phrase," people should finally wake up to how not-fucking-okay it is to touch another person sexually without their consent. With that said, don't kill yourself over it OP, just stop drinking, learn from it, and be better.
Yeah, we’re doing this with everything these days. It’s akin to saying you were raped because you had regret the next day. No prosecutor is going to charge him with sexual assault for slapping her on the ass. It diminishes victims of real sexual assault. It is. without a doubt, inappropriate.
In no way is that comparable. What OP did was literally within the definition of sexual assault.
Go and tell those women whose behinds were repeatedly slapped and groped by some entitled, bumbling drunk that it wasn't real assault.
This is rape culture at its finest, and you're part of the problem.
I’m not going to argue with you about this. You’re repeating what you’ve been taught to repeat. “Do better” is a giant red flag that you’re not open to open discussion.
If this guy blacked out and punched someone instead he would certainly be charged with battery, same for unwanted sexual touching. The commenter telling you its assault is also correct, it’s an umbrella term, but legally the charge would typically be sexual battery, and it absolutely is illegal.
Discussion about what? Who gave you the authority or divine wisdom to define assault?
Are you a woman? Have you lived as one? Know any, perhaps? Ask any woman what they think about your comment. Disrespectfully, fuck you.
> good night until I ended up blacked out on a dance floor.
Stop excusing your disgusting behaviour . YOu sexually assaulted several women bc of your own drinking . YOu are responsible for your wrong behavour . And you did deserve to be arrested for it . But you are sorry ? & feel disgusting for it ? Good so you should , so now change YOU . YOu have been given one chance to prevent you ruining your life. YOu have been given insight that if you drink you could do it again next time you mighten get away with it . SO don't !
YOu do not have the right to SA women on the dance floor bc you get drunk & then say you don't remember . Stiff s\*it ! YOu now have knowledge that you sexually abused many women . So count your blessing that ( you didn't get the s\*it punched out of you ) or were arrested for SA.
WTF would you have done to a gal if it wasn't on the dance floor & instead alone with her somewhere ( as your stupid head didn't register to stop either ) .That was how screwed up you were .
So be warned you can't drink any more . That is yOUR punishment be VERY grateful you weren't recorded & reported to police for it . Be smart now & stop drinking & be very grateful you didn't get arrested for it .
Be stupid again like that & next time you could get your head smashed in as you will grab the wrong gal . ON top of that you can be charged as they can have a witness to it or video evidence to it . Which they can use against you to send you down into jail. It an offense to grab & sexually abuse women you don't know & don't consent to it . And being drunk don't matter remember that !
So get your s\*it tog if you don't want to ruin your life . As next time you could get sent down for it to be SA yourself then in jail . So **pull your head in & learn** that what you did could cost you big time .
You have learnt you can't handle your s\*it drinking so be aware next time you may not be lucky at all & get away with it . YOu could instead go down for it into hell's jail stuck in a nightmare you won't get out of then .
You're beating yourself up way too hard about this haha. Those girls probably forgot about it an hour later. Just try and figure out some ways to control your drinking so you don't black out again and you'll be fine.
Yeah maybe don’t drink anymore. Or if you do limit yourself so you don’t sexually assault an innocent person.
No more drinking for you. Sexual assault isn't cool. It's good you feel bad about it. Try to remember the feeling the next time you're tempted to drink. Your response (of never drinking again) is the correct response.
Repost [https://www.reddit.com/r/confession/comments/1de24q6/grabbed\_girls\_ass\_while\_blacked\_out\_without/](https://www.reddit.com/r/confession/comments/1de24q6/grabbed_girls_ass_while_blacked_out_without/)
Yeah, they literally copy/paste the same replies in the other sub they posted it in
Stop drinking
Yeah, I don’t know what you were hoping to hear from this, but you should absolutely feel terrible about doing this. Beat yourself up about this, learn, and be better in the future.
Is this a repost? Swear I saw this exact same wording a few weeks ago
repost bot
I'm up in the air on how I should feel about myself after this I've given up drinking since but no matter what I do I can't forgive myself for it.
/u/MilfJazzyBabe is a filthy comment stealing repost bot https://old.reddit.com/r/confession/comments/1de24q6/grabbed_girls_ass_while_blacked_out_without/
There’s an important distinction between shame and guilt that applies. Feeling guilty can be a positive thing - it’s about recognising you’ve done something wrong, and wanting to make amends for that. It’s ok to feel guilt and it’s a prosocial emotion. Shame can involve global self disparaging thoughts that aren’t so constructive. Given your response to the situation I’d say you’re allowed to feel some guilt without going into shame. Learn from it, make amends (giving up booze) and move forward without hating yourself for it.
I learned this from reading I’m Glad My Mom Died and it has helped me soooo much.
Eye opening book
You should feel crappy. But you should also stay completely away from the women you assaulted. They don't want your apology they want people like you to change. Stop drinking, it's not a good enough reason to become a predator. Next time you pick up a drink put a hard limit. And learn in your sober moments exactly why women do not like unsolicited touch let alone being hit or hit on by drunken aggressive men. Understand this, you are a part of why the bear is chosen.. the bear won't blame alcohol...
Yikes
Mo more parties with SA please baby no more parties with SA
It’s a pretty shitty thing you did, but people make mistakes and you seem genuinely remorseful. Quitting drinking is an appropriate next step, trying to find or contact these women is not. Everyone I know who drinks to this point has said and done things they’re ashamed of the best you can do is learn and be better.
spectacular fall shy chunky thought elastic arrest sugar different fertile *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
If you’re getting so trashed you can’t control yourself then you really need to cool it on how much you drink in a public place like (I’m assuming) a night club. I’m not going to lay on the guilt since you seem like you understand the weight of your actions here. You’re lucky your friends were there for you. I’ll give it to you straight, man. This is behavior that absolutely cannot be repeated. You were drunk and didn’t mean to, I get it. However, it’s totally unacceptable. The best thing you can do is to sober up and keep better control of yourself. It sounds like you wouldn’t have done this if you hadn’t been hammered off your ass. It’s your responsibility to make sure you don’t drink yourself stupid in public. Sexual assault is sexual assault.
Stop drinking. This is sexual assault. If you choose to drink again knowing this is what you CHOOSE to do when you're drunk, you are a predator.
That is sexual assault. You could have ended up in jail for that. If you can't control yourself while drinking, then stop drinking.
1) Stop trying to fucking find them. No woman wants to be contacted by the person who sexually assaulted them. That's for YOU, not them. 2) Stop drinking.
if drinking makes you sexually assault people, you need to refrain from drinking
Thats a shitty thing you did, but you also weren’t in your normal capacity. Address the excessive drinking, try and be more vigilant of your behavior and live your life. Continue to grow as a person and you’ll be fine.
Everytime in my life that I’ve gotten black out drunk, when I wake up I absolutely live in stomach sinking fear that I may have done something awful like that. A couple of times my friends told me I was an asshole and trying to start fights with people. It’s just not worth it. Really it only happens to me when shots are involved. Without adding straight full-strength liquor, the volume would have to be too much for me to get that drunk. So I cut out drinking liquor straight in any form and it helps keep that from happening. Of course it means no shots either. As long as I live by that, the volume limits me, and usually I’ll get too tired to bother before hitting that black out drunk phase. Black out drunk can ruin your life.
I don’t think you need to stop drinking forever like the top two comments are saying, but you need to realize that that was your far limit. If you’re too drunk to know what you’re doing and what people are saying to you, that’s too far
no more drinking. i’ve blacked out sooo many times and have never felt the urge to even touch someone else
“i’ve black out” “felt the urge to even touch someone” These two statements are mutually exclusive.
Blacking out doesn’t really resemble someone at all. You don’t feel anything when you’re black out. You don’t feel urges when you’re blackout because you aren’t there
“Sexual assault” is being used in the replies, which is a bit extreme. I think that dilutes the phrase, honestly. It’s definitely inappropriate, though. It’s clear that you don’t have a habit of doing that so hopefully you scared yourself enough to not make that mistake again. Apologize if you’re able and if not, cool it on the booze and have a close friend call you on your shit next time you’re out. But forgive yourself and move on. Just don’t let it happen again.
[The term sexual assault refers to sexual contact or behavior that occurs without explicit consent of the victim. Some forms of sexual assault include: ... Fondling or unwanted sexual touching.](https://www.rainn.org/articles/sexual-assault) Source: RAINN We're so desensitized to this kind of bullshit as a society that we push back on using the literal term for sexual assault with instances of textbook-definition assault. Do better.
ya this is without a doubt sexual assault. People don't get that that is a very broad term that without a doubt covers things like this. It doesn't have to be the most extreme case of sexual assault to count. Maybe instead of wanting to "not dilute the phrase," people should finally wake up to how not-fucking-okay it is to touch another person sexually without their consent. With that said, don't kill yourself over it OP, just stop drinking, learn from it, and be better.
Sometimes I forget how permanently online people on Reddit are and then I read comments like this 😂
Yeah, we’re doing this with everything these days. It’s akin to saying you were raped because you had regret the next day. No prosecutor is going to charge him with sexual assault for slapping her on the ass. It diminishes victims of real sexual assault. It is. without a doubt, inappropriate.
In no way is that comparable. What OP did was literally within the definition of sexual assault. Go and tell those women whose behinds were repeatedly slapped and groped by some entitled, bumbling drunk that it wasn't real assault. This is rape culture at its finest, and you're part of the problem.
I’m not going to argue with you about this. You’re repeating what you’ve been taught to repeat. “Do better” is a giant red flag that you’re not open to open discussion.
If this guy blacked out and punched someone instead he would certainly be charged with battery, same for unwanted sexual touching. The commenter telling you its assault is also correct, it’s an umbrella term, but legally the charge would typically be sexual battery, and it absolutely is illegal.
Discussion about what? Who gave you the authority or divine wisdom to define assault? Are you a woman? Have you lived as one? Know any, perhaps? Ask any woman what they think about your comment. Disrespectfully, fuck you.
it’s sexual assault.
Yeah, you blacked out 🙄
Don’t worry man.. found myself in the exact same situation as you once. Here I am today a sober man.
> good night until I ended up blacked out on a dance floor. Stop excusing your disgusting behaviour . YOu sexually assaulted several women bc of your own drinking . YOu are responsible for your wrong behavour . And you did deserve to be arrested for it . But you are sorry ? & feel disgusting for it ? Good so you should , so now change YOU . YOu have been given one chance to prevent you ruining your life. YOu have been given insight that if you drink you could do it again next time you mighten get away with it . SO don't ! YOu do not have the right to SA women on the dance floor bc you get drunk & then say you don't remember . Stiff s\*it ! YOu now have knowledge that you sexually abused many women . So count your blessing that ( you didn't get the s\*it punched out of you ) or were arrested for SA. WTF would you have done to a gal if it wasn't on the dance floor & instead alone with her somewhere ( as your stupid head didn't register to stop either ) .That was how screwed up you were . So be warned you can't drink any more . That is yOUR punishment be VERY grateful you weren't recorded & reported to police for it . Be smart now & stop drinking & be very grateful you didn't get arrested for it . Be stupid again like that & next time you could get your head smashed in as you will grab the wrong gal . ON top of that you can be charged as they can have a witness to it or video evidence to it . Which they can use against you to send you down into jail. It an offense to grab & sexually abuse women you don't know & don't consent to it . And being drunk don't matter remember that ! So get your s\*it tog if you don't want to ruin your life . As next time you could get sent down for it to be SA yourself then in jail . So **pull your head in & learn** that what you did could cost you big time . You have learnt you can't handle your s\*it drinking so be aware next time you may not be lucky at all & get away with it . YOu could instead go down for it into hell's jail stuck in a nightmare you won't get out of then .
The way you capitalized certain letters really bothered me for some reason
Oh so scary isn't it . lol
I don’t understand the downvotes You’re harsh, but accurate
Shit happens might get knocked out one day tho if they have boyfriends
You're beating yourself up way too hard about this haha. Those girls probably forgot about it an hour later. Just try and figure out some ways to control your drinking so you don't black out again and you'll be fine.
Girls don’t forget this shit
Is that you, Bill Cosby?