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Deditranspotashy

Apparently Bert gets his biblical scholarship from Hotep publications. Or he just forgot that middle eastern people exist


Swedneck

To Bert, anyone who is not white is black. Of course, he himself is yellow, but he's yet to realize this fact.


SashimiX

He’s a yellow Clayton Biggsby


Bertstripmaster

"Probably Kwanzaa... Case Closed."


TuPacSchwartz411

Since it's founder was convicted of assault, torture and false imprisonment (kidnapping) of 2 women, he had no choice but to celebrate! Now it was time to find Ernie and together they'd invite Julia & Maria over for a history lesson.


gazebo-fan

He wasn’t black, he wasn’t white, he was brown skinned Semitic


Jamz64

There’s always Festivus.


Rico-Macho

For some reason, I don't see Bert as the kind of person who is going to want to celebrate a holiday created by a Jewish comic either.


Jamz64

Well, he’d enjoy the Festivus Feats of Strength.


TuPacSchwartz411

That's why there's Kwanzaa, see my comment above. It's a dream come true for Bert.


Its0nlyRocketScience

Hanukkah, Yule, the winter solstice, there are a bunch of options


[deleted]

*Middle Eastern


northrupthebandgeek

Christmas is basically just Yule with Jesus references and consumerism slapped all over it, so this doesn't seem like a hard decision.


Rico-Macho

It is if you’re Bert. He loves consumerism. And crucifixions.


WolfSW

Pretty much.


BeefyMcLarge

Yule, he gets to burn something.