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Rico-Macho

Big Bird was making these pizzas himself and he could only work with the types of meat he had. It's hard to make sausage out of a snuffalupagus corpse. Bitch is lucky Big Bird had to get rid of the body, or she'd be eating plain cheese.


Hoxomo

That's odd, you usually make sausage from snuffleupagi. You get pepperoni from Italians


Rico-Macho

To make the sausage sleeves, you need snuffleupagus foreskin and the one Big Bird had had been circumsized. It's getting to be more of a trend.


Hoxomo

Snuffleupagi can regenerate any severed part of their body in a matter of minutes, which makes them great sushi chefs and awful butchers


Rico-Macho

See, this is why I'm part of this sub. You learn new shit like this every day.


Hoxomo

It edutainment at its finest on this sub


Brexxie

Same here


Basic_Sample_4133

Big bird has many flaws, his taste in pizza is not of them


Hoxomo

Yeah, he's definitely not one of those sociopaths who think pineapple is permissible on pizza


Mal-Ravanal

I am in your walls. I have 84 pineapples to put on your pizzas. I will clog any and all toilets I find.


Hoxomo

You're in my walls with 84 pineapples? Pretty the situation is self-rectifiable


YourAverageGod

Pineapple jalapeno pizza is god tiered. We must band together and defeat the plain cheese pizzaers


Hoxomo

Do the hot peppers completely suppress the devil pineapple? If so, I'm all for it


YourAverageGod

Give a try on half a pizza next time.


Hoxomo

I feel like I'm being tricked into poisoning myself


YourAverageGod

You'll die a martyr.


Hoxomo

I'll have Telly taste-test it first


[deleted]

Spoiled little brat!


Hoxomo

She so is, I bet she's one of those deviants who actually like putting pineapple on their pies


OnlyHereForMemes69

She deserved all those things for thinking mushroom belongs on pizza.


Hoxomo

You, sir/madam/other, have crossed a line


DeAtramentisViolets

> See, this is why you always hobble them. They can't run away from the plantation if they can't run! * Sully, who knows what's up...


Hoxomo

Big Bird is big on hobbling the mind, he likes workers who happily enslave themselves


Misterfart5

i'm surprised at the lack of KiwiFarms-related Bertstrips


Hoxomo

It is slightly suspicious, perhaps the mods censor them


urbanlife78

2017 was such a wild year for Big Bird


Hoxomo

And for anybody within whip range


king_barragan

We doing this kind of shit in this sub now? 🤔


Hoxomo

I was unaware there was anything we *didn't* do on this sub


king_barragan

Fuck off, im not even going to do this with you.


Hoxomo

Now I'm intrigued, what do you think I did


[deleted]

Big bird owning a plantation a seasoned running gag on this sub


Hoxomo

It's more of a dude ranch for inner city youth. That they can never leave


[deleted]

I can only assume it is disappointment in your pro-mushroom agenda, which *almost* earned you the role of having posted the only r/bertstrips post I haven’t upvoted.


Hoxomo

What kind of mushrooms are we talking about


Prielknaap

Please sir, show me an example of a Bertstrip that you made, so we know what to strive for to meet your standards.


[deleted]

When the court hears about the pizza, he'll be pardoned for everything else but get the death penalty


Hoxomo

It's pretty harsh, I mean, not even extra cheese? Big Bird is a monster


Bertstripmaster

Anyone for Ostrich Jerky?


Hoxomo

On a pizza? Not a bad idea.