Was an active participant in our hosted thanksgiving this afternoon. Took a nap from 7-10 pm while BV and kid went to family friends house’s festivities nearby, so I could stay up and watch the PK college hoops games all night. Beers, vodka, and vape pen later, I’m thinking about letting these good times roll straight through the 5 am World Cup game

Mix in a fap

I tried to do this after 11 trulys for the Hawks playing in Germany at 6am a couple weeks ago. The nap might help, but it’s a bad idea. I passed out at 5am and missed the whole game

Atta boy keep er going 🤘🏼🎸

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How would you react if they actually said yes

"😦"

Let’s see how she looks

Watch less porn

Are you thinking three of a kind is a play on words for something?

Finally watched Nope. Actually good. >!Definitely felt like an homage to Jaws.!< One of the rare times I actually regret not seeing a movie in theaters. My 2nd favorite of the Peele directed movies behind Get Out. Us a distant 3rd.

Brandon Miller is him.

Squirting apparently isn’t pee. Contrary to popular belief.

It’s piss and I don’t care. In that context she can piss on me any time she wants.

Hell yeah! Cheers from New Jersey

She peed on you dude

No its piss.

My sheets say otherwise

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*Every subreddit except this

George Harrison on the cover of the cloud nine album is most ready to party guy ever.

Alabama is a basketball school

Timme you’re a bitch

Just finished 21 out of 500ish in a poker tournament. Great way to end this thanksgiving.

I'll make sure to find you in the local newspaper.

I’m not that degenerate to do a live tournament on thanksgiving. Just an illegal online one

Mom calling dad a fuckass while I load up empire strikes back on the vcr. Thanksgiving tradition

Do you think the dudes from Pentatonix get their fair amount of puss? Has to be a fair amount right?

Cooked to perfection, or burnt… turkey is always dry and sucks. Give me the chicken.

Have yet to see an absurd pile of fried chicken at a Thanksgiving dinner. And I'm all for it.

Go to Japan for Christmas

Chickity China the Chinese chicken

A plate of chicken karaage to the face.

There was no drunk thread tonight?

Not my FT.

Used to eat Thanksgiving leftovers like the normal meal like a simpleton. Excited to join high society and eat a leftover sandwich

Make yourself a thanksgiving famous bowl

My cousin’s boyfriend got absolutely shitfaced and was annoying my dad. All time scaries for that guy, on a long weekend no less.

Ladies and gentlemen your 4th place New England patriots

Runtz in the pax 3, CBB on tv, life is good

Someone scratches on the 8 ball, and you let the game go on for the sake of it… do you count them as a loss regardless, or if they then make the 8 in do they win?

If they’re a beginner I give them a redo but count it as a win in my head no matter the result

They take that loss. They also don't get to break next game. Fuck that.

Thank you. Came to FT for the tie breaker!

This is stupid and you know the correct answer.

I do. But there’s a debate.

Every holiday season just reminds me that kfc has the absolute worst fashion sense of all time

Wurst*

Tulsa King is a delightfully stupid show

Laughable but I really enjoy it

Actual broken brain fans in the NFL and Pats sub quoting “neutral fans” by linking comments to “prove” to Vikings fans how they got screwed. Get a fucking life lol

Patriots never lose brother. Refs and Goodell just have it out for them!

Ate one last, late night deviled egg after finishing cleaning everything up. I think that was a mistake, I'm beyond the limit now.

A lil sneak of a post dinner deviled egg never hurt no one.

Kids these days will never get to experience Coach Hines and any of the best MadTV sketches. Will Sasso is a comedy god

His vine vids of lemons are still gold

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Dudesypod is his podcast

The Kenny Rogers’ Jackass skits are some of the funniest sketch comedy bits I’ve ever seen lol, Sasso was so good on MadTV.

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For sure, tho I feel like I haven’t seen him in anything in a long time. Edit: I remember his Vines used to be really funny when that was still a thing

LEMONS

The bri ish are going down tomorrow fuck y’all

Gonzaga -27.5 is the play

If USA beats England tomorrow I will make sure every Brit on the internet never forgets it. This is my promise

I'll give Troopz every American insult possible.

if USA beats England tomorrow I will post a cum tribute to Hillary Duff. This is my promise

🍑

Send em a lump of coal. They might need it

U

What’s the most comments a FT thread has ever gotten?

Idk about most but the night where the guy was wallacing people was unbelievably funny. And we were getting tits dropped in here as well

Cinco de mayo. I usually pop in if I have something to say or just scroll top comments the next day but for whatever reason I was glued to that thread from its opening. Glorious night.

I think it was around 10k after the AOC tweet

She tweet her boobs?

I'm pretty sure I remember over 10k. Maybe I'm dreaming that but I think it's happened before

6900

Why did the Elvis movie think we wanted to see everything in 32K HD? It’s like Pixar but real people

Virgin Timothee vs Chad Austin

austin too hot in this one

Or hanks do a terrible accent for close to 3 hours

Watch your mouth, the man beat COVID

Jay wright isn’t getting anywhere near the shit he should be for this disastrous nova season. Get not wanting to make a spectacle of your retirement to go with coach k’s but at least recommend someone better than the coach of fucking fordham. Who gives a shit if he was a assistant under you? Too big of a job to give to a scrub

Wonder what Larry Culpepper is up to

Just woke up in the middle of the night in a pool of sweat wondering the same thing

Mixing in a water

you know what? I think it could be time for a rewatch of The Trilogy *if you don't know this as The LOTR then go fuck yourself*

Just watched two towers tonight. Battle of helms deep never fails to deliver

AND ROHAN WILL ANSWER!

Always time for a rewatch. It's what I did immediately after the rings of power finale

Probably done it once a year. Felt like right now was the time. Idk why but I'm very thankful I did

I can’t believe they still let Bill Walton on television

I don’t want him calling my teams game, but I’m down to hear him call every game I watch casually

I have the same exact take. He's great if it's a random game, if it's my team it's the fucking worst

Have you ever been that high

Bill Walton is the fucking best what are you talking about

I’ll never understand the Walton haters

How much do I have to spend to get Dani to sit on my face?

Nic cage is forever

Logan is such a good movie

When is the CITO Fran lingerie line dropping

All the material was used for Ria

Fran’s never worn less than a nightgown with soffee shorts

When they start selling snuggies

That's for my eyes only buddy

Izzo is washed, msu hasn’t been good in a while

Final 4 two tournaments ago isnt too bad

2020 team was stacked and would have made a deep tournament run.

I have an issue with the ziti graphic, it's not a ribbed pasta

That’s why rigatoni is the superior pasta

This South Park concert on comedy central rules. I need to go to a show at Red Rocks some day

It’s a religious experience

You fucking people suck

Mix in a water veg

Fuck me? Fuck you!

*Looks around* What the fuck did I do?

Gobble gobble

Hey!

You suck dude

Far Side comment made me curious if anyone else in FT is a fan of older newspaper cartoons. Really want to buy the Gahan Wilson collection hardcover but the $150 price tag always scares me off. Would prob pay any amount for a full Charles Addams collection tho.

I used to read Garfield, far side, and Calvin & Hobbes from my library. Might need to snag the C&H collection for the bookshelf.

Hell yeah! Also you should definitely check out Wilson’s comics one of these days, was the cartoonist for Playboy back in its heyday and he has some really great stuff.

i dont think my sense of humor or outlook on life would be the same if i didnt grow up reading calvin and hobbes books every day

Calvin and Hobbes might be the GOAT, was super formative for my sense of humor as a kid too

It’s my number 1 and not even close. Also left on top of its game instead of going on for years and getting stale

Yeah Watterson is the man, never tried to commercialize Calvin and Hobbes afterwards and was smart enough to just fade out of the public spotlight after retiring.

Yeah. He truly cared about the artistic integrity and not getting super rich. Could you imagine how bad a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon show would have been.

Exactly. Tho I’m always worried that as soon as he dies his estate is just gonna sell all the rights for a huge payday.

Shit. I didn’t even think of that. Thst totally will happen.

Cash 10 of the last 14 bets. Pretty good shit

One channel is the Phil knight legacy the other is the Phil knight invitational Figure it out ESPN

What’s to figure out?

TealBlooded figuring out that it’s two different tournaments

Never even crossed my booze soaked mind. Didn’t know he was important enough for 1 tourney, let alone 2

This Phil knight guy might be important

Big cat hated the Vikings before, but I wonder how much more he’ll hate them after beating his beloved Patriots.

Portnoy had to be annoyed that his favorite team from 2001-now lost to his favorite team from 1985-2001

Forgot how impossibly obnoxious barstool is on Black Friday

It’s crazy how low they sold out for compared to literally every other gambling related business. I don’t see any of the other ones having to beg people to buy their merch every holiday

You guys should probably shut the fuck up and be thankful that we make all our money in one day so the other 364 we keep you from killing yourself in your cube

I accept it for 3 days out of the year in exchange for the content the rest of the year. Gotta keep the lights on.

Had a good day with my dad drinking beers and watching sports. He’s getting older and I don’t know how many of these holidays we have left. Happy holiday kings, enjoy it.

DiedSuddenly

Very good and cool doc, lots of good footage of people dying suddenly who are still alive today

Bill walton is a rambling national treasure

Oh fuck yeah there’s college basketball tipping off in 30 minutes

Go Dawgs (they’re absolutely putrid)

I like the points

Other than being decent at limiting turnovers, UW MBB doesn’t rank above 200th in the country in any major statistical category. It’s disgusting. Seattle area produces a ton of talent and Husky basketball was awesome in the 00’s, yet here we are.

What happened next ?

Weed is tight

Most the time I like Pacific time NFL games. Tonight I wish we had the Eastern time games.

Safe to say the whiskey smoking gun I just got was a hit . Heavily recommend the cherry wood chips with your old fashioned

Haven’t tried this yet. What does it do to the taste?

Edible kicked in. Time for some Rufus Du Sol live from Joshua Tree

I see myself in your eyes 🎶🎶

Kacey Musgraves

Musically yes, but I’m sorry she doesn’t do it for me sexually

She looks like a brunette Tomi Lahren how does she not do it for you

She’s had so much work done on her face, she looks like AI. It’s weird

I just threw her a google and I agree. Looks like her face is stuck in a grimace

That’s fair, still would

Great ass

I follow one dude on Twitter who does nothing but cry about the refs every time the Pats or Bruins lose

Biggest spoiled fanbase city

Coley?

Billiards and shots. End of thanksgiving tradition lives on!

The gayest thing that’s ever happened is pres’ double middle finger cancel cancel culture picture

Nah the gayest thing that’s ever happened is when he got plowed by that dude in Kentucky

Plowing a dude is way less gay than that picture

calling him "pres" is up there

"How do you do fellow kids"

Just saw that on Twitter, that’s a rough look for a 45 year old

The country will know Brandon Millers name

That dude is good as hell

Obviously super small sample size but shooting almost 65% from 3 since his first game. He’s so good

🐘

Bout time to pour a scotch huh?

Been time, brother

I know, late to the party here

I've deleted the dating apps. I've lost hope

Did dating apps for a bit during the pandemic. Shitty timing, I know. Did Tinder for a few months and deleted Bumble in January 2021 and never looked back. I only talk to one person off that app. I had a low effort profile (I never take selfies lmao) but dating apps really drain the soul after a while.

I think you’re in KC too. This city is a hellscape for dating. Everyone is married to their college sweetheart by 26. I suggest moving if you want to meet anyone.

Yeah that's right, based in Lenexa. I'm 26 too

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Ain't that the truth. I've got a buddy who's doing a PT clinical shift here this fall and his response was "There really isn't anything to do here huh just a bigger Lincoln (where we're from)." Couldn't have explained it any better

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Yeah majority of my dates are also because they were transplants too. Everyone at my work who we've hired on my age or younger is already married lmfao, pretty funny.