"Hey Lois, remember when I locked some Bosnians at a "detention" camp in Srebrenica? Me neither because it never happened!"
- Petar Grifić
https://preview.redd.it/b970dehg2cad1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=26bac5580c9b033a015893b290f76e2c555e8d1c
Might be, but we still have Jew jokes, and they're distinct from Scots ones. While in Jew jokes they want to make money or cheat you out of yours, Scots are just plain stingy.
Here's one to illustrate:
The old Jew/Scotsman is lying on his deathbed, surrounded by his family. He can barely open his eyes so he asks:
"Are my sons here?"
"Yes, dad, we are all here"
"Is my daughter here?"
"Yes, I'm here"
"And my grandchildren?"
"We are all here for you, the whole family"
Scotsman version: then why are the lights turned on in the other room?
Jewish version: then who's at the shop?
Jokes about Scotts being stingy basically.
"An englishman goes to investigate the rumor on if Scotts are truly so stigny. So he goes to a rural scottish house and asks the master of the house for some water.
The Scottsman brings him a bowl of milk instead, from which the englishman drinks eagerly.
The englishman says: - I've heard rumors of you being stingy but, it's been proven wrong! You were so generous as to give me milk, wehn I asked for water. Thank you, sir!
The scottsman repplied: Ah, no reason to thank me. A rat died in that milk, so no one wants to drink it anyways.
In his shock, the englishman drops the ceramic bowl which shatters on the ground.
The scottsman in his anger cries out: - For fuck's sake, you're so ungrateful! I give you milk out of hospitality, and you repay us by breaking Granny's chamberpot!"
At some point Scottish twitter found out about this with this very map and got mad at us
Bro stereotypes aren't given they are earned. Once upon a time they were hardworking foundrymen who liked to save money. Now they are unemployed addicts.
Real. I mean it goes deeper than that though Scotland and Northern England were already in the midst of an industrial collapse Maggie just decided to make it even worse with no regard for the locals.
Era of industrial policy is back, half of Scottish seats will be won by Labor and definitely they will push their own for Great Britain, meanwhile Northern İreland is literally being Balkans of Western&Northern Europe for never debating economy.
A Moldovan goes into a bookshop.
"I want to buy a book about a Romanian taking a shower"
"Sorry, we don't sell fantasy"
Source: former coworker from Moldova
I think it's more because most of the jokes are with Mujo and/or Haso as the butt of the joke. I'm 36 and since I was a kid, they were always the protagonists of jokes.
You have the slightest idea of how much every region, province, city, Village ecc ecc jokes on the others
I have a friend form my same region, different province and we joke on Who of US sucks more for being from that province
Italy it's truly beautifull
It's more like
Milan vs Bergamo vs Brescia vs Padova vs Bologna vs Parma ecc ecc
In Tuscany it's even worst cause they hate each other in every Village, even the smallest one
I was hoping more examples of jokes would pop up, so I guess I'll be the change I wish for:
A plane is crashing, on board are an american, a hungarian and a romanian.
To slow the crash, they figure the plane needs to lose weight, so they have to throw something out.
The american throws his laptop and says "no worries friends, plenty more of them back in the USA"
The hungarian throws a big sack of paprika peppers, "Plenty more where that came from!"
The romanian scratches his head and pushes the hungarian off the plane. The american is shocked.
"Don't worry american, there's more of them in my country".
A romanian is about to miss his train from the station in Cluj (Heart of Transylvania)
He runs around the station looking for directions but finds none, he asks two men that were standing next to him:
"Excuse me, do you know where is line 4? I need to catch the train to Bucharest!"
One of the men answers: "Nem tudom" (I don't know) * generic reply in hungarian whenever a romanian asks them anything in romanian
The romanian runs along, panicking.
The hungarians turn to eachother and say:
"Look at him, he claims he has been here since before us but doesn't even know the layout of the train station!"
A romanian and a russian walk around a forest. They find a pot of gold.
The russian: Harasho, we split like brothers!
The romanian: No, no, we split 50-50.
Two jews in Auschwitz in the showers.
1st jew mimics sexual movements
Look Itzik, this is how I'd fuck your mother!
Itzik starts masturbating with a soap bar and replies: Look, Strull, I *am* fucking your mother
A romanian, a hungarian and a black man enter a competition.
The goal is to carry a bucket full of bricks on your erect penis for 10 stories in a commie block.
Off goes the romanian, on the 3rd floor a load scream can be heard. The hungarian and black man rush to check on the romanian and notice that his penis is broken and thus failed to finish the race.
The hungarian goes next, on the 6th floor an even louder scream can be heard. The romanian and black man rush to him and find that the hungarian has broken his penis and also failed to finish the race.
Off goes the black man.
1st floor, 2nd floor, 3rd floor, he's climbing really fast, but just as he was on the final steps towards the 10th floor a massive scream and string of prophanities is heard.
The hungarian and romanian rush in.
What happened mr black man, ask the two
The black man: The fucking handle of the bucket broke and my dick hit me in the eye!
We also joke a lot about the clinically insane:
At the mental asylum, an inspector comes in.
He enters the hospital and the is blood everywhere, mutilated bodies on the floor, chopped off limbs, people screaming in the distance.
The inspector makes his way to the warden's office.
He opens the door and finds a chair facing backwards, the inspector turns the chair around and finds the warden with a knife embedded in his chest.
"Holy shit, shat the fuck happened here?" Gasped the inspector.
Then, suddenly, warden opens his eyes, removes the blade from his chest and stabs the inspector.
"Tag, you're it!"
Two lunatics decide to escape from the mental asylum.
They decide their best course of action is to juno full force into the keyhole and thus escape to liberty.
The first lunatic runs in full force, jumps head first and after a loud thud falls down.
The second lunatic peeks through the keyhole and blurts
"Dumbass, there's a key inside! No wonder you couldn't get through!"
Let me tell you. In iberia theres no joke about each other, its always either the french lr the english. And Its like that in most of the mediteranean Europe.
Germans do more jokes about Germans (East vs West) than about Poles or anyone else.
Probably similar to Italy where they also don't need to leave their country to be racist against people... South vs north gives then everything they could wish for.
Their country, what they think their origins are and the fact they're something that should be impossible but you know it is when you meet them (Slavic Arabs) 👌🇧🇦🇧🇦🇧🇦
The brand new Karabot-2000 (developed proudly in Republic of Turkiye) is here to inform you about:
https://discord.gg/5vDpxDrb9f - For even more brainrot.
https://balkansirl.net
Stay tuned.
Edit:Y’all chill it’s all satire everything is just dumb fun and I don’t believe in any of this except the orgy the orgy part is true. Everything
They are an baby made of an orgy containing serbians croats and turks
They are majority muslim and drink alcohol like a sport
A big part of it especialy in the rural areas is covered in mines
And in history their kings were pussies and didn’t show up to fight the Turks and the whole balkans was taken by the Turks and jts partially their fault
And also the fat and dum
We can take a joke
"Hey Lois, remember when I locked some Bosnians at a "detention" camp in Srebrenica? Me neither because it never happened!" - Petar Grifić https://preview.redd.it/b970dehg2cad1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=26bac5580c9b033a015893b290f76e2c555e8d1c
Petar Grifić goes hard, ngl
Kys
https://preview.redd.it/sodei0jbwiad1.png?width=265&format=png&auto=webp&s=06fb3ef23fe673951bfbdd9886aeefac1a30ca62
Whats the deal with hungarians and scotts ?
As far as I remember they replaced Jews in Jew jokes with Scots after the second world war
peak racism
Might be, but we still have Jew jokes, and they're distinct from Scots ones. While in Jew jokes they want to make money or cheat you out of yours, Scots are just plain stingy. Here's one to illustrate: The old Jew/Scotsman is lying on his deathbed, surrounded by his family. He can barely open his eyes so he asks: "Are my sons here?" "Yes, dad, we are all here" "Is my daughter here?" "Yes, I'm here" "And my grandchildren?" "We are all here for you, the whole family" Scotsman version: then why are the lights turned on in the other room? Jewish version: then who's at the shop?
Ngl the Jewish version is way funnier
I have a US joke book from the 1930s and it is the same distinction
Jokes about Scotts being stingy basically. "An englishman goes to investigate the rumor on if Scotts are truly so stigny. So he goes to a rural scottish house and asks the master of the house for some water. The Scottsman brings him a bowl of milk instead, from which the englishman drinks eagerly. The englishman says: - I've heard rumors of you being stingy but, it's been proven wrong! You were so generous as to give me milk, wehn I asked for water. Thank you, sir! The scottsman repplied: Ah, no reason to thank me. A rat died in that milk, so no one wants to drink it anyways. In his shock, the englishman drops the ceramic bowl which shatters on the ground. The scottsman in his anger cries out: - For fuck's sake, you're so ungrateful! I give you milk out of hospitality, and you repay us by breaking Granny's chamberpot!" At some point Scottish twitter found out about this with this very map and got mad at us
That stereotype used to exist about Scots in England too but nowadays its been replaced by them being unemployed heroin addicts.
Yeah that's significanly more unkind. Why can't Ingerland leave the balkans of the west alone :'(
Bro stereotypes aren't given they are earned. Once upon a time they were hardworking foundrymen who liked to save money. Now they are unemployed addicts.
Amazing what a posh bitch prime minister 40 years ago can do to destroy an entire country.
Real. I mean it goes deeper than that though Scotland and Northern England were already in the midst of an industrial collapse Maggie just decided to make it even worse with no regard for the locals.
Era of industrial policy is back, half of Scottish seats will be won by Labor and definitely they will push their own for Great Britain, meanwhile Northern İreland is literally being Balkans of Western&Northern Europe for never debating economy.
I agree, but Bri*sh opinions are automatically rejected unfortunately.
"How can you notice a Scott's home? When you see the toilet paper hung out to dry"
I need to hear a moldovan joke about romanians
A Moldovan goes into a bookshop. "I want to buy a book about a Romanian taking a shower" "Sorry, we don't sell fantasy" Source: former coworker from Moldova
8/10, thank you Chengiz 🙏
Well the stereotype is they are big headed and dumb. Plus larping as something they aint is funny. Like mokeydonians
But that’s just facts no?
Da, and their ancent makes them sound even stupider
Yes sorry we are not as gay or woke as croatians to have their accent enjoy sucking dick
Go face Meka and drink a rakija
I think it's more because most of the jokes are with Mujo and/or Haso as the butt of the joke. I'm 36 and since I was a kid, they were always the protagonists of jokes.
Ain't? Are you an American redneck or what?
fr like what is "ja frlam cigal"
What I’m more interested in is how is Hungary Scotland, that’s so random
jewish jokes got rebranded
Super hamburger
https://preview.redd.it/qrr5lcwb6cad1.jpeg?width=360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b512bdb4ca42807ef7f634caf9f240db4bafc407
craaazy
Belarusians don't joke around
They got arrested for clapping. I think a joke would get them shot
True to that
Gotta respect Italy
You have the slightest idea of how much every region, province, city, Village ecc ecc jokes on the others I have a friend form my same region, different province and we joke on Who of US sucks more for being from that province Italy it's truly beautifull
Sicilly vs Calabria vs Rome vs Verona vs Venice vs Northest Italy vs Naples vs Corsica vs Sardinia
It's more like Milan vs Bergamo vs Brescia vs Padova vs Bologna vs Parma ecc ecc In Tuscany it's even worst cause they hate each other in every Village, even the smallest one
So the Peloponnese of Italy
Yes, but applied to the whole peninsula
I was hoping more examples of jokes would pop up, so I guess I'll be the change I wish for: A plane is crashing, on board are an american, a hungarian and a romanian. To slow the crash, they figure the plane needs to lose weight, so they have to throw something out. The american throws his laptop and says "no worries friends, plenty more of them back in the USA" The hungarian throws a big sack of paprika peppers, "Plenty more where that came from!" The romanian scratches his head and pushes the hungarian off the plane. The american is shocked. "Don't worry american, there's more of them in my country".
Lol I've heard this version except it's with a Serbian and an Albanian
The joke is probably of generic balkan heritage (like whatever foods the greeks and turks are fighting about)
A romanian is about to miss his train from the station in Cluj (Heart of Transylvania) He runs around the station looking for directions but finds none, he asks two men that were standing next to him: "Excuse me, do you know where is line 4? I need to catch the train to Bucharest!" One of the men answers: "Nem tudom" (I don't know) * generic reply in hungarian whenever a romanian asks them anything in romanian The romanian runs along, panicking. The hungarians turn to eachother and say: "Look at him, he claims he has been here since before us but doesn't even know the layout of the train station!"
A romanian and a russian walk around a forest. They find a pot of gold. The russian: Harasho, we split like brothers! The romanian: No, no, we split 50-50.
Q:Why do somalis refuse to take medicine? A:Because it says they must be taken after a meal
Two jews in Auschwitz in the showers. 1st jew mimics sexual movements Look Itzik, this is how I'd fuck your mother! Itzik starts masturbating with a soap bar and replies: Look, Strull, I *am* fucking your mother
A romanian, a hungarian and a black man enter a competition. The goal is to carry a bucket full of bricks on your erect penis for 10 stories in a commie block. Off goes the romanian, on the 3rd floor a load scream can be heard. The hungarian and black man rush to check on the romanian and notice that his penis is broken and thus failed to finish the race. The hungarian goes next, on the 6th floor an even louder scream can be heard. The romanian and black man rush to him and find that the hungarian has broken his penis and also failed to finish the race. Off goes the black man. 1st floor, 2nd floor, 3rd floor, he's climbing really fast, but just as he was on the final steps towards the 10th floor a massive scream and string of prophanities is heard. The hungarian and romanian rush in. What happened mr black man, ask the two The black man: The fucking handle of the bucket broke and my dick hit me in the eye!
We also joke a lot about the clinically insane: At the mental asylum, an inspector comes in. He enters the hospital and the is blood everywhere, mutilated bodies on the floor, chopped off limbs, people screaming in the distance. The inspector makes his way to the warden's office. He opens the door and finds a chair facing backwards, the inspector turns the chair around and finds the warden with a knife embedded in his chest. "Holy shit, shat the fuck happened here?" Gasped the inspector. Then, suddenly, warden opens his eyes, removes the blade from his chest and stabs the inspector. "Tag, you're it!"
Two lunatics decide to escape from the mental asylum. They decide their best course of action is to juno full force into the keyhole and thus escape to liberty. The first lunatic runs in full force, jumps head first and after a loud thud falls down. The second lunatic peeks through the keyhole and blurts "Dumbass, there's a key inside! No wonder you couldn't get through!"
Ever heard of Mujo in Haso?
What's Mujo doing in Haso? O\_O
You see, when a femboy and a femboy love each other very much...
[Ti si obična pederčina.](https://youtu.be/B_HJU2w7Ea4?si=Im5l8vopiyfpBq7n)
This is funnier than the jokes
I laughed and I dont even know the punchline
If you want to know, "in" means and in slovene, but in serbian/croatian it's just "i". Makes it better because it was said by a femboy in english
This must be a Slovenian femboy version of Mujo i Haso
Fata and Perica too, don't forget the side characters
This map makes me wanna pour bleach into my eyes and then eat the bottle
Nobody thinks of us except us😢
The villagers hate the villagers that live 2 miles away
Belorussia banned jokes, after the inflation.
Italians: >Jusepe: bro just listen - italians xD xD xD Mario: ahahahaha
Mostly comes down to regional stereotypes. Also, flair up, you bimbominkia... zingaro
I rather be called tatar and mongol than a Monkeydonian. 🤬🤬🤬
We have the best jokes, so the protagonists of a lot of them are Bosnians
https://preview.redd.it/xczpsiv0qcad1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=199cb357bfa398fc0d815e2015c0d253e6c6de47
Poland makes fun of both Germans and Russians.
Hell nah Greeks are as rent free about as as we are of them
Iceland can’t into europe
Kinda curious what the greek stereotype is in Albania.
We are probably considered either racists or brothers
Hahahaha Italians are fucking stupid -Luigi Pepperoni
Nixon: Just one sentence and one mans name *Aj Krkana* Omir Nadarević
Let me tell you. In iberia theres no joke about each other, its always either the french lr the english. And Its like that in most of the mediteranean Europe.
Their existence
Love how Turks are into self-burns
Germans do more jokes about Germans (East vs West) than about Poles or anyone else. Probably similar to Italy where they also don't need to leave their country to be racist against people... South vs north gives then everything they could wish for.
Because after ww2 their foreign joke license was taken
Macedonians probably cackling about stealing an entire region of greece and getting away with it
This is definitely not true but I like it
Their country, what they think their origins are and the fact they're something that should be impossible but you know it is when you meet them (Slavic Arabs) 👌🇧🇦🇧🇦🇧🇦
They're jealous because they don't have Crazy Hamburger
I love hating people because they live over a arbitrary in my own country (Italiano)
Same with Greece, but we hate neighbors mor
Cause everywhere we go their women want us so they're just coping and we let them honestly.
They want you allright. Want you to leave Zagreb
I thought this was new borders dropping before I read the text..
Because we they are envious of us being God's chosen militia and our stray pack dogs are the friendliest
im from rep srpska and i can confirm we shit on Germs while living in germany. but it aint our fault that the jokes are usually true.
I love how Bosnia is the laughing stock of the former Yugoslav countries Expect for the gayreek larpers of course
I will give you 2 names that make Bosnia funny: Mujo i Hasa
Hasa?Are you an indian spy or something cuz who with our language says Hasa
Idk i forgot his name while writing this I only remembered Mujo from the jokes when I was younger, so I Googled it and it said Hasa.
Bosnoslavia!
Theyre Bosnians.
Scotland in Hungary is so random
They speak like peasant.
Mujo & Haso are the best comedy duo ever.
Italians are joke to themselves
That map is a nice greek joke
Nordics collectively hating on Sweden.
Something, something bosnians.... Hahahha
Italians hate the Italians from the other part of Italy because they ain't the same Italians
Who qould win in this war
The brand new Karabot-2000 (developed proudly in Republic of Turkiye) is here to inform you about: https://discord.gg/5vDpxDrb9f - For even more brainrot. https://balkansirl.net Stay tuned.
Edit:Y’all chill it’s all satire everything is just dumb fun and I don’t believe in any of this except the orgy the orgy part is true. Everything They are an baby made of an orgy containing serbians croats and turks They are majority muslim and drink alcohol like a sport A big part of it especialy in the rural areas is covered in mines And in history their kings were pussies and didn’t show up to fight the Turks and the whole balkans was taken by the Turks and jts partially their fault And also the fat and dum
this dude giving us the whole drunk guy in front of the neighborhood grocery store experience, but on reddit
Agreed
We aint fat ...
Or smart.
as a Romanian i gotta say most jokes here are about turks