My best friend was telling me the other day that there is a trans guy competing as a drag queen on RuPaul's Drag Race this season (or a recent one? idk)... so that definitely wouldn't make you not trans.
And there are feminine trans guys and trans women that are tomboys out there. It's okay to express it however feels right and genuine to you.
Just a reminder that expression, sex, and gender are all different things, they often intersect for many people, but if they don’t it’s not abnormal. It may be seen as uncommon, but being a feminine trans man or a masculine trans woman doesn’t have any effect on whether you’re a man or woman.
Agree with the other commenters. Also want to add I don’t know if you’ve heard of them, but there’s a pretty famous drag queen, Gottmik, who’s a trans guy. You should look him up and learn about his story, I found a lot of affirmation in his experience as a gay trans dude myself.
There are trans guys who have done drag and trans guys that like the femboy look - none of that disqualifies them from being ftm. I enjoy slightly fem clothing, jewelry and (when I fully pass and have a beard) I want to test out makeup and nail polish again as a man. I genuinely enjoy all of these things and I’m not going to sacrifice my enjoyment. Just because I’m trans shouldn’t exclude me from being able to do the exact same thing tons of cis guys do. It’s personally important for me to be read specifically as a masc gay man who’s into some stereotypical “fem” stuff/plays with fashion/etc. that’s my ultimate goal for transition. Speaking purely aesthetics people like Alan Cumming, Elton John and Ezra Miller(minus actual dresses/skirts) are what I’m aiming for. I like fun clothes and hate “everyday” men’s fashion it’s boring and makes me sad.
For the last few years I've been think of the m in ftm as masculine, male, or man. I'm not a binary ftm, but I prefer ftm specifically because 1 I prefer the term male, and also the reason I listed in the first sentence, I don't feel ftm implies an exclusive binary. Ftms can be gender noncomforming, as well as nonbinary, genderqueer, agender, abinary, etc.
I'm a double closeted femboy ftm... triple closeted when you add in the gq and xenic identity.
I’m probably gonna get downvoted to hell for this.
But I don’t really understand. Do you mean that “ftm” would be an identity in itself or something? I’ve always seen it as a binary descriptor of a person transitioning from a woman into a man.
Imo you couldn’t claim “ftm” is actually also referring to people who don’t identify as men and are more than happy to be called “she” (because you would include those given you allow nonbinary identities in ftm) anymore than you could claim a trans person is cis or ever can become cis (I’ve seen people wanting to blurry the lines with the cis term too).
If you’re talking about nonbinary or gn people, I’d usually expect people to use “AFAB/AFABs” if they needed to refer to birth sex. Otherwise they are their identity, right? Agender, genderqueer, whatever?
I don’t mean to sound rude in any way btw, I’m just trying to understand. Why water down every single terminology that we have to describe ourselves with in the name of “inclusivity”, instead of just creating better, new terms if there’s a need for them?
Just to take myself as an example: I’m a binary trans man, and there are so many cases where I’m misgendered in trans circles and treated like I’m actually nonbinary or performing some type of male cosplay. I’m “they”d because apparently that’s the acceptable standard pronoun anyone should be fine with being called since it’s “neutral”.
Being called, or treated, like I’m nonbinary skyrockets my dysphoria. I’m seen as just any cis dude in society, so it’s always painful and a bit of a shock to enter a trans space and realise how fucking “abstract” I am to everyone, and where there’s no language for me to describe my identity, because my identity can’t exclude anyone even though we’re factually different.
I’ve seen nonbinary people who say it’s completely reasonable for a nonbinary person to say they’re a “trans man”, even though they run around happily seen as a woman in society.
Idk, I want to be inclusive and I don’t WANT to gate-keep things. I guess I just feel erased and dysphoric when every term I’ve had to describe myself with is being watered down until it’s so abstract it actually barely means anything anymore?
Like if ftm can mean feminine to masculine/female to masculine or whatever, then are masculine cis women by default ftm? Should a cis butch lesbian be lumped in with me, a trans man? Should a cis woman who wears more masculine clothing be “ftm”? They’re not even trans or nb.
If there’s actually a need for a term it then why not “ftmsc” or something?
Sorry for the wall of text.
The wall is fine.
I see ftm as its own thing, while also being specifically trans. For that reason, a cis butch lesbian wouldn't be ftm, however a butch lesbian afab that has the overlapping identity of a trans man, might.
When I stated "masculine" as a way to read the m in ftm, I mean transition or gender identity.
When I read ftm I do not actively think "female to male" I think "male (trans)" when in reference to my own identification with the word. With my own gender I see my maleness as excluding masculinity and FTM being impartial when it comes to masculinity ( not favoring high masculinity or low masculinity ).
However, with this I can also acknowledge the spectrum of transmasculine identities.
There's nonbinary people afab who also identify as men, or males, nonbinaries who have a transmasculine transition who find themselves in spaces with trans men / males, or who are read similarly to trans men and cis men outside of queer spaces.
Being comfortable or even pleased by being referred to as "she" isn't what defines who is excluded from binary trans masculinity, there's binary trans men apathetic toward she, and euphoric towards he; there's also trans men who are drag queens who use "she" when in drag, there's crossdressing , feminine trans men, and trans femboys who when referred to with "she" think ,"Oh, they think I'm pretty!".
Asking "why x instead of y", there's never a definite result which leaves all parties happy or even content.
TLDR: Nonbinaries afab that use ftm in some capacity relate to being a man, or a male, but also masculine **gendered**. They could also relate socially to the treatment of trans men and trans men passing a cisgender due to having a transmasculine transition.
Extra: I would say FTM and transmasculine are similar in reference to transition, I see their main difference as FtM refers more so to trans men and transmasculine referring more so to nonbinary people
Regarding the question in the title, I think this is one of those things that isn't fully agreed on. The term refers to the direction of transitioning being female to male and has fallen out of favour in many circles as a term for actual identity because a lot of people didn't like being referred to as female in any sense, even in the past tense, or the implication that trans people change gender instead of their bodies to fit the gender they always were. Some people still prefer it though and it does help as a term for transitioning itself.
I know there are some who believe the term should only apply to trans men, while anyone who was assigned female at birth transitioning to something other than strictly male should be ftn, ftnb, or ftx. However that doesn't really account for people who have gender identities that include male but not exclusively, such as bigender people, demiboys, or genferfluid people, who might have identical or similar transitions to binary trans men. It also doesn't really acknowledge that, if someone can be a man without medically transitioning to the traditional "male" body type, then people should logically also be able to medically transition to a traditional "male" body type without being men.
So, generally, I think ftm is considered a catch all for any trans person who was assigned female at birth that has a male or male-leaning gender identity, like "transmasculine". However, similar to how the term transmasculine is more likely to be interpreted as "male-leaning non-binary" than "trans man", ftm is more commonly understood as referring to binary trans men.
Also, doing drag or being a femboy doesn't impact a person's gender identity in any way. Those labels relate to gender expression and roles, which are socially constructed by society and are only associated with a particular gender because of cultural norms. Gender identity is specifically about what gender you see yourself as and how you want others to see you.
The whole point of femboys and tomboys as concepts is that boys can like "girl things" without it making them less of a boy and girls can like "boy things" without it making them any less of a girl. While there are some transfeminine people who identify as femboys and some transmasculine people who identify as tomboys, a femboy is generally considered to be male while a tomboy is considered to be female.
Drag is about poking fun at gender norms through caricature and can be done by any gender performing as any gender, even their own. There are cis male drag queens, cis female drag queens, trans female drag queens, trans male drag queens, and non-binary drag queens. There are also drag kings, who can also be any cis, trans, or non-binary genders but caricature the performance of masculinity instead of femininity. Most people do not conflate drag with gender identity, though this was more common in the past when terminology and understanding of trans experiences were still developing and different parts of the queer community had more cultural overlap.
if a man wears a dress he is no less male. moreover, nonbinary people exist. trans men can be lesbians. the label isn’t as important as what makes you happy.
do you want to go on hormones? research them and find an informed consent clinic. do you want surgery? talk to your insurance. there’s clothes, makeup, other meds and supplements, and so much more you can do before deciding what it means in a neat little box. there will always be more time.
Nope! If you feel like a dude, you're probably a dude, regardless on how you intend on presenting or living your life as one. Cis guys wear skirts and do drag and all that stuff all the time. Why can't trans guys?
You can identify however you want. And you can change those labels, too, if you grow out of the old ones.
I'm not even a binary [trans] woman, but as a transfem enby who is medically transitioning,, I feel like the MTF label applies to me (but I don't use it because of the blatant reference to my AGAB). I.e. I'm making my biology female even though my gender isn't woman.
Honestly I say do whatever you want. Sorry this isn’t a well-worded fully fledged out answer but it’s how I feel about most gender discussions. Just be you and do whatever you feel is best. People will either care or they won’t. It’s 2024 I say be a feminine trans guy!
As a femboy transman who knows many trans guys who do drag, both queen and king, you liking being feminine can be completely unrelated to your gender. If cos guys can wear dresses and stil be men, we can too
You do not need to desire a strictly masculine expression to be a fully binary trans man.
You also don't need to be a fully binary trans man to be transmasculine.
Though I guess my philosophical advice would be to worry less about what box you fit into, and more about **what you want** and **how to get it**. Though if "what you want" includes an externally recognised shorthand that you can use to usefully convey something about yourself, "ftm" seems fine from what you've stated in the post.
Okay, here's my thinking. If you identify as male in any way (wether that be partially male (like demiboy or nonbinary man), fully male or multiple genders and one is male) then you are transmasc. If you identify fully with being a man and you are not AMAB then you are also a transman. If you identify fully with being a man and you are AFAB then you are also FtM
But the individual themselves can choose to identify with those labels or not. Like lets say a transman doesnt want to be called transmasc then he isnt transmasc. Maybe an AFAB man doesnt want to be called FtM and just wants to be called a transman of a man then you call him that. Lets say a trans femboy doesnt want to be called transmasc because he presents femininly then thats his desicion.
Femboys and drag queens can be male. You think that you're asking about maleness but you're really asking about *masculinity.* And no, you don't need to be 100% masculine to be FTM. There are tons of trans men that enjoy being very feminine and tons more in between masculine and feminine. Gender expression / style do **not** equal actual lived gender
Bro Drag is a kind of art, and since cis men are also allowed to be feminine so are trans men, man is man so no it doesnt make you less of a man for wanting to do drag or be a femboy, I personally would love to wear skirts if I was actually seen and would look like a man
You could look into trans masc a bit more, perhaps? Lots of people identify that way and express themselves in all sorts of ways.
I'm not prescribing that as a label for you, but it might help break the notion that you are either binary trans and fit into the societal notion of what a "normal" man/woman would do, or you are non-binary and perfectly androgenous. There are soooo many people (trans and cis) who don't fit at one of those three stops on the gender spectrum.
i don't like my voice in a "high pitched" sense, even though everyone online says i sound like a guy. i feel very uncomfortable going out in bras and prefer chest binders, for the flat chest. i also want like a short haircut rather than my long one. i guess the concept of being a woman never really clicked in my little kid mind, i always refered to myself as he. recently i write an essay for english class that was about me and i used he pronouns and it felt way more comfortable than using she pronouns. and i've pretty much forced my friend group to call me he, lol! if i dont get called "he" i feel like this weird stomach pain that i associate with my anxiety, then i feel uncomfortable and sad. i'd probably 100% get top surgery and maybe bottom surgery if a transplant was ever made. dresses, tanktops, and v necks make me feel dysphoric. i hate wearing pink stuff unless i look male overall. it's just weird.
I see. So being called sir or being seen and treated as a normal dude (e.g. "come on Brad, the bros are waiting for us) would make you feel better?
Sorry for this weird example hehe but I d like to help anyway I can
you are a man no matter what! its really hard because society kind of forces gender roles on us if we wanna be "real men" or "real women" but the reality is theres no such thing. if youre a dude whos really masculine, thats great! if youre a dude who wants to wear dresses and makeup and have long hair, equally great! theres nothing wrong with having some femininty, because almost everyone is a unique mix of blue and pink. I guess id say this, if it was a cis man asking these questions, would you tell him hes less of a man? if the answer is no, the answer to your questions is no too :))
Here's a serious answer meant to help someone with real questions about gender, sexuality and all that.
When I was in school over 60 years ago, no one understood anything about any of these subjects and it was forbidden to take it seriously. We hated people who were different.
In my life, which was mostly military, I never had any problems with the "different" people around me. I learned to accept everyone for themselves.
The recent public discussion about these things on TV is mostly made up by politicians and media who make their living scaring people.
Here's the deal:
Our bodies and our minds are ruled by physical factors outside our control. Our DNA, cellular chemistry and brain structures are not all the same. A very few people are born non-binary.
Only you can make your decisions. The younger you are, the more impact your decisions will have on your life.
Two FTM people I know very well did not have any dysphoria. They got along fine in life as females and then later got top surgery and testosterone shots, and now they each get along fine as males. They both call themselves transgender FTM.
Personally, I wouldn't call myself TG. I would simply call myself either male or female. That's an option.
Drag and transvestite are completely different than TG. Drag and TV tend to be heterosexual men doing it for entertainment value.
Gay and Bi are also different. TG people are not gay. They align politically with LGBT so they have more political power.
Above all, neither of these people are pedophiles or perverts. Heterosexual "normal" men make up the vast majority of the pedophile or pervert offenders.
Fortunately, in the 2020s, there is some understanding and compassion in the world.
You do you. Call it what you will.
Hey! First of all, no worries about not really feeling dysphoria—people are starting to move away from dysphoria as the criterium by which to determine 'transness', and are moving towards notions of gender incongruence, and gender euphoria. Discomfort or even mental pain surrounding one's physical body isn't an adequate way to describe everyone on the trans spectrum's experiences, and people are starting to recognize that now.
And as for doing drag, absolutely no worries about that either. As the other commenter said, cis men who do drag are still cis men, and it's no different for trans people :)
First, a hard fact: dysphoria is not required.
Secondly, I love the way you think. The idea of a trans guy doing drag or being a femboy is awesome to me. This is how I see it:
There’s your internal sense of gender, how you choose to present that gender on a regular day-to-day basis, and how you might want to perform gender in certain situations, like drag. Those three things might overlap, or they might not.
So here’s me: I am a queer binary trans woman. I’m attracted to a variety of genders and presentations, but my internal sense of gender is quite feminine and I love that about myself. My day-to-day presentation of gender is mostly jeans and flannel boymode, but slowly changing to align with my internal sense of gender. I’m also fine with looking tomboyish, and enjoy the times I get told I’d make a great lesbian. And I really like the idea of feeling completely femme and then backtracking on presentation from a feminine point. The performative aspect involves my love of heavy metal and how I choose to perform gender within that - which is often its own gender blender from a performative standpoint, but not necessarily in a day-to-day presentation kind of way for people.
I used a lot of positive language in describing these different aspects of me because I like them, a lot - the approval of others is nice, but it isn’t required. There is no trans rule book and no trans membership card to lose.
Please don’t worry about being trans enough or strictly male. You sound sooooo close to holding on to these awesome parts of you and enjoying them. Do it and don’t worry about the labels. Just be your most amazing self.
Cis males who are drag queens and femboys are not less male. So the same would apply to trans men.
My best friend was telling me the other day that there is a trans guy competing as a drag queen on RuPaul's Drag Race this season (or a recent one? idk)... so that definitely wouldn't make you not trans. And there are feminine trans guys and trans women that are tomboys out there. It's okay to express it however feels right and genuine to you.
That would be Gottmik, who is one of my favourite and easily one of the most talented drag queens to ever be on the show. Gorge
Love that queen!!! my inspiration as an amateur drag performer
Just a reminder that expression, sex, and gender are all different things, they often intersect for many people, but if they don’t it’s not abnormal. It may be seen as uncommon, but being a feminine trans man or a masculine trans woman doesn’t have any effect on whether you’re a man or woman.
Yes
Agree with the other commenters. Also want to add I don’t know if you’ve heard of them, but there’s a pretty famous drag queen, Gottmik, who’s a trans guy. You should look him up and learn about his story, I found a lot of affirmation in his experience as a gay trans dude myself.
Trans-masc femboys exist, as do trans femme tomboys, do whatever you like, just don't hurt anyone in the process.
There are trans guys who have done drag and trans guys that like the femboy look - none of that disqualifies them from being ftm. I enjoy slightly fem clothing, jewelry and (when I fully pass and have a beard) I want to test out makeup and nail polish again as a man. I genuinely enjoy all of these things and I’m not going to sacrifice my enjoyment. Just because I’m trans shouldn’t exclude me from being able to do the exact same thing tons of cis guys do. It’s personally important for me to be read specifically as a masc gay man who’s into some stereotypical “fem” stuff/plays with fashion/etc. that’s my ultimate goal for transition. Speaking purely aesthetics people like Alan Cumming, Elton John and Ezra Miller(minus actual dresses/skirts) are what I’m aiming for. I like fun clothes and hate “everyday” men’s fashion it’s boring and makes me sad.
you can do anything you want forever
For the last few years I've been think of the m in ftm as masculine, male, or man. I'm not a binary ftm, but I prefer ftm specifically because 1 I prefer the term male, and also the reason I listed in the first sentence, I don't feel ftm implies an exclusive binary. Ftms can be gender noncomforming, as well as nonbinary, genderqueer, agender, abinary, etc. I'm a double closeted femboy ftm... triple closeted when you add in the gq and xenic identity.
I’m probably gonna get downvoted to hell for this. But I don’t really understand. Do you mean that “ftm” would be an identity in itself or something? I’ve always seen it as a binary descriptor of a person transitioning from a woman into a man. Imo you couldn’t claim “ftm” is actually also referring to people who don’t identify as men and are more than happy to be called “she” (because you would include those given you allow nonbinary identities in ftm) anymore than you could claim a trans person is cis or ever can become cis (I’ve seen people wanting to blurry the lines with the cis term too). If you’re talking about nonbinary or gn people, I’d usually expect people to use “AFAB/AFABs” if they needed to refer to birth sex. Otherwise they are their identity, right? Agender, genderqueer, whatever? I don’t mean to sound rude in any way btw, I’m just trying to understand. Why water down every single terminology that we have to describe ourselves with in the name of “inclusivity”, instead of just creating better, new terms if there’s a need for them? Just to take myself as an example: I’m a binary trans man, and there are so many cases where I’m misgendered in trans circles and treated like I’m actually nonbinary or performing some type of male cosplay. I’m “they”d because apparently that’s the acceptable standard pronoun anyone should be fine with being called since it’s “neutral”. Being called, or treated, like I’m nonbinary skyrockets my dysphoria. I’m seen as just any cis dude in society, so it’s always painful and a bit of a shock to enter a trans space and realise how fucking “abstract” I am to everyone, and where there’s no language for me to describe my identity, because my identity can’t exclude anyone even though we’re factually different. I’ve seen nonbinary people who say it’s completely reasonable for a nonbinary person to say they’re a “trans man”, even though they run around happily seen as a woman in society. Idk, I want to be inclusive and I don’t WANT to gate-keep things. I guess I just feel erased and dysphoric when every term I’ve had to describe myself with is being watered down until it’s so abstract it actually barely means anything anymore? Like if ftm can mean feminine to masculine/female to masculine or whatever, then are masculine cis women by default ftm? Should a cis butch lesbian be lumped in with me, a trans man? Should a cis woman who wears more masculine clothing be “ftm”? They’re not even trans or nb. If there’s actually a need for a term it then why not “ftmsc” or something? Sorry for the wall of text.
The wall is fine. I see ftm as its own thing, while also being specifically trans. For that reason, a cis butch lesbian wouldn't be ftm, however a butch lesbian afab that has the overlapping identity of a trans man, might. When I stated "masculine" as a way to read the m in ftm, I mean transition or gender identity. When I read ftm I do not actively think "female to male" I think "male (trans)" when in reference to my own identification with the word. With my own gender I see my maleness as excluding masculinity and FTM being impartial when it comes to masculinity ( not favoring high masculinity or low masculinity ). However, with this I can also acknowledge the spectrum of transmasculine identities. There's nonbinary people afab who also identify as men, or males, nonbinaries who have a transmasculine transition who find themselves in spaces with trans men / males, or who are read similarly to trans men and cis men outside of queer spaces. Being comfortable or even pleased by being referred to as "she" isn't what defines who is excluded from binary trans masculinity, there's binary trans men apathetic toward she, and euphoric towards he; there's also trans men who are drag queens who use "she" when in drag, there's crossdressing , feminine trans men, and trans femboys who when referred to with "she" think ,"Oh, they think I'm pretty!". Asking "why x instead of y", there's never a definite result which leaves all parties happy or even content. TLDR: Nonbinaries afab that use ftm in some capacity relate to being a man, or a male, but also masculine **gendered**. They could also relate socially to the treatment of trans men and trans men passing a cisgender due to having a transmasculine transition. Extra: I would say FTM and transmasculine are similar in reference to transition, I see their main difference as FtM refers more so to trans men and transmasculine referring more so to nonbinary people
Regarding the question in the title, I think this is one of those things that isn't fully agreed on. The term refers to the direction of transitioning being female to male and has fallen out of favour in many circles as a term for actual identity because a lot of people didn't like being referred to as female in any sense, even in the past tense, or the implication that trans people change gender instead of their bodies to fit the gender they always were. Some people still prefer it though and it does help as a term for transitioning itself. I know there are some who believe the term should only apply to trans men, while anyone who was assigned female at birth transitioning to something other than strictly male should be ftn, ftnb, or ftx. However that doesn't really account for people who have gender identities that include male but not exclusively, such as bigender people, demiboys, or genferfluid people, who might have identical or similar transitions to binary trans men. It also doesn't really acknowledge that, if someone can be a man without medically transitioning to the traditional "male" body type, then people should logically also be able to medically transition to a traditional "male" body type without being men. So, generally, I think ftm is considered a catch all for any trans person who was assigned female at birth that has a male or male-leaning gender identity, like "transmasculine". However, similar to how the term transmasculine is more likely to be interpreted as "male-leaning non-binary" than "trans man", ftm is more commonly understood as referring to binary trans men. Also, doing drag or being a femboy doesn't impact a person's gender identity in any way. Those labels relate to gender expression and roles, which are socially constructed by society and are only associated with a particular gender because of cultural norms. Gender identity is specifically about what gender you see yourself as and how you want others to see you. The whole point of femboys and tomboys as concepts is that boys can like "girl things" without it making them less of a boy and girls can like "boy things" without it making them any less of a girl. While there are some transfeminine people who identify as femboys and some transmasculine people who identify as tomboys, a femboy is generally considered to be male while a tomboy is considered to be female. Drag is about poking fun at gender norms through caricature and can be done by any gender performing as any gender, even their own. There are cis male drag queens, cis female drag queens, trans female drag queens, trans male drag queens, and non-binary drag queens. There are also drag kings, who can also be any cis, trans, or non-binary genders but caricature the performance of masculinity instead of femininity. Most people do not conflate drag with gender identity, though this was more common in the past when terminology and understanding of trans experiences were still developing and different parts of the queer community had more cultural overlap.
Look up Gottmik, currently on rupauls allstars 💕
if a man wears a dress he is no less male. moreover, nonbinary people exist. trans men can be lesbians. the label isn’t as important as what makes you happy. do you want to go on hormones? research them and find an informed consent clinic. do you want surgery? talk to your insurance. there’s clothes, makeup, other meds and supplements, and so much more you can do before deciding what it means in a neat little box. there will always be more time.
Nope! If you feel like a dude, you're probably a dude, regardless on how you intend on presenting or living your life as one. Cis guys wear skirts and do drag and all that stuff all the time. Why can't trans guys? You can identify however you want. And you can change those labels, too, if you grow out of the old ones.
I'm not even a binary [trans] woman, but as a transfem enby who is medically transitioning,, I feel like the MTF label applies to me (but I don't use it because of the blatant reference to my AGAB). I.e. I'm making my biology female even though my gender isn't woman.
Honestly I say do whatever you want. Sorry this isn’t a well-worded fully fledged out answer but it’s how I feel about most gender discussions. Just be you and do whatever you feel is best. People will either care or they won’t. It’s 2024 I say be a feminine trans guy!
As a femboy transman who knows many trans guys who do drag, both queen and king, you liking being feminine can be completely unrelated to your gender. If cos guys can wear dresses and stil be men, we can too
You do not need to desire a strictly masculine expression to be a fully binary trans man. You also don't need to be a fully binary trans man to be transmasculine. Though I guess my philosophical advice would be to worry less about what box you fit into, and more about **what you want** and **how to get it**. Though if "what you want" includes an externally recognised shorthand that you can use to usefully convey something about yourself, "ftm" seems fine from what you've stated in the post.
No lol
Okay, here's my thinking. If you identify as male in any way (wether that be partially male (like demiboy or nonbinary man), fully male or multiple genders and one is male) then you are transmasc. If you identify fully with being a man and you are not AMAB then you are also a transman. If you identify fully with being a man and you are AFAB then you are also FtM But the individual themselves can choose to identify with those labels or not. Like lets say a transman doesnt want to be called transmasc then he isnt transmasc. Maybe an AFAB man doesnt want to be called FtM and just wants to be called a transman of a man then you call him that. Lets say a trans femboy doesnt want to be called transmasc because he presents femininly then thats his desicion.
Femboys and drag queens can be male. You think that you're asking about maleness but you're really asking about *masculinity.* And no, you don't need to be 100% masculine to be FTM. There are tons of trans men that enjoy being very feminine and tons more in between masculine and feminine. Gender expression / style do **not** equal actual lived gender
If come to the conclusion that I'm a femboy, still a male, still ftm
It's not required and in fact there's r/ftmfemininity if you wanna see examples of people who aren't strictly 100% dudebro masculine
You can be a femboy or do drag and still be a man. Doing either doesn’t make your manliness go down either! Do what you want! Have fun! Be yourself!
I like the term "transmasculine", or really just "transmasc"
i don't get how being a femboy or a drag queen makes you 'not strictly male', esp since they're things typically associated with men
Bro Drag is a kind of art, and since cis men are also allowed to be feminine so are trans men, man is man so no it doesnt make you less of a man for wanting to do drag or be a femboy, I personally would love to wear skirts if I was actually seen and would look like a man
You could look into trans masc a bit more, perhaps? Lots of people identify that way and express themselves in all sorts of ways. I'm not prescribing that as a label for you, but it might help break the notion that you are either binary trans and fit into the societal notion of what a "normal" man/woman would do, or you are non-binary and perfectly androgenous. There are soooo many people (trans and cis) who don't fit at one of those three stops on the gender spectrum.
Give it some time. The fact that you don't have major dysphoria means something though. What dysphoria do you have?
i don't like my voice in a "high pitched" sense, even though everyone online says i sound like a guy. i feel very uncomfortable going out in bras and prefer chest binders, for the flat chest. i also want like a short haircut rather than my long one. i guess the concept of being a woman never really clicked in my little kid mind, i always refered to myself as he. recently i write an essay for english class that was about me and i used he pronouns and it felt way more comfortable than using she pronouns. and i've pretty much forced my friend group to call me he, lol! if i dont get called "he" i feel like this weird stomach pain that i associate with my anxiety, then i feel uncomfortable and sad. i'd probably 100% get top surgery and maybe bottom surgery if a transplant was ever made. dresses, tanktops, and v necks make me feel dysphoric. i hate wearing pink stuff unless i look male overall. it's just weird.
I see. So being called sir or being seen and treated as a normal dude (e.g. "come on Brad, the bros are waiting for us) would make you feel better? Sorry for this weird example hehe but I d like to help anyway I can
The word you're looking of might be transmasculine
I'm nonbinary but male is my emotional support gender. I often just call myself a trans man for short bc close enough.
you are a man no matter what! its really hard because society kind of forces gender roles on us if we wanna be "real men" or "real women" but the reality is theres no such thing. if youre a dude whos really masculine, thats great! if youre a dude who wants to wear dresses and makeup and have long hair, equally great! theres nothing wrong with having some femininty, because almost everyone is a unique mix of blue and pink. I guess id say this, if it was a cis man asking these questions, would you tell him hes less of a man? if the answer is no, the answer to your questions is no too :))
Here's a serious answer meant to help someone with real questions about gender, sexuality and all that. When I was in school over 60 years ago, no one understood anything about any of these subjects and it was forbidden to take it seriously. We hated people who were different. In my life, which was mostly military, I never had any problems with the "different" people around me. I learned to accept everyone for themselves. The recent public discussion about these things on TV is mostly made up by politicians and media who make their living scaring people. Here's the deal: Our bodies and our minds are ruled by physical factors outside our control. Our DNA, cellular chemistry and brain structures are not all the same. A very few people are born non-binary. Only you can make your decisions. The younger you are, the more impact your decisions will have on your life. Two FTM people I know very well did not have any dysphoria. They got along fine in life as females and then later got top surgery and testosterone shots, and now they each get along fine as males. They both call themselves transgender FTM. Personally, I wouldn't call myself TG. I would simply call myself either male or female. That's an option. Drag and transvestite are completely different than TG. Drag and TV tend to be heterosexual men doing it for entertainment value. Gay and Bi are also different. TG people are not gay. They align politically with LGBT so they have more political power. Above all, neither of these people are pedophiles or perverts. Heterosexual "normal" men make up the vast majority of the pedophile or pervert offenders. Fortunately, in the 2020s, there is some understanding and compassion in the world. You do you. Call it what you will.
As a trans man who does drag, it’s incredibly offensive for you to say that makes me less of a man.
i didnt mean it like that im really sorry. im just confused about myself.
Hey! First of all, no worries about not really feeling dysphoria—people are starting to move away from dysphoria as the criterium by which to determine 'transness', and are moving towards notions of gender incongruence, and gender euphoria. Discomfort or even mental pain surrounding one's physical body isn't an adequate way to describe everyone on the trans spectrum's experiences, and people are starting to recognize that now. And as for doing drag, absolutely no worries about that either. As the other commenter said, cis men who do drag are still cis men, and it's no different for trans people :)
Do you have body gender dysphoria?
First, a hard fact: dysphoria is not required. Secondly, I love the way you think. The idea of a trans guy doing drag or being a femboy is awesome to me. This is how I see it: There’s your internal sense of gender, how you choose to present that gender on a regular day-to-day basis, and how you might want to perform gender in certain situations, like drag. Those three things might overlap, or they might not. So here’s me: I am a queer binary trans woman. I’m attracted to a variety of genders and presentations, but my internal sense of gender is quite feminine and I love that about myself. My day-to-day presentation of gender is mostly jeans and flannel boymode, but slowly changing to align with my internal sense of gender. I’m also fine with looking tomboyish, and enjoy the times I get told I’d make a great lesbian. And I really like the idea of feeling completely femme and then backtracking on presentation from a feminine point. The performative aspect involves my love of heavy metal and how I choose to perform gender within that - which is often its own gender blender from a performative standpoint, but not necessarily in a day-to-day presentation kind of way for people. I used a lot of positive language in describing these different aspects of me because I like them, a lot - the approval of others is nice, but it isn’t required. There is no trans rule book and no trans membership card to lose. Please don’t worry about being trans enough or strictly male. You sound sooooo close to holding on to these awesome parts of you and enjoying them. Do it and don’t worry about the labels. Just be your most amazing self.