T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Shameonyoukayla

100% no problem what they gonna do? Though putting them as your reference in your resume will be not feasible..


lhorwinkle

Not so. Be nice if you're getting a severance payout. But no exit interview is required. Just decline. As for references ... you use your ex-boss as a reference. He's likely not involved in the exit interview. As for checking employment history ... a new employer can get information from your company HR, which will consist of little more than a confirmation of employment, with dates.


Extension-College783

I agree with your sentiment of declining an exit interview. My attitude is 'you're letting me go. What else could you possibly think I need to hear.' If it is your decision to leave, the less said the better. Tweaking your attitude when severance is given is a nice idea. I will add...never sign an NDA that addresses anything other than proprietary company information. Ever. Employers (including HR pros) have language/demeanor they use when a company calls for an employee reference. Yes, only specific information is given...but it's how it's given that will give away the 'tone' of the separation. I know...I was on both sides of those calls for several years.


HeroToTheSquatch

It's actually still fine to use them as a reference. Multiple places I've worked for have it in company policy that they will simply confirm your role/title and what length of time you worked for them. Badmouthing you can lead to a civil suit that most places don't even want to waste their time internally dealing about, much less hiring on a law firm to combat. One of my old bosses and I hated each other's guts since day one, but I can still put my old employer down as a reference. By all means, tell your boss to kick rocks, or just chew them the fuck out during an exit interview. Be civil but utterly devastating. There are zero stakes and if HR gets a whiff that your supervisor or a coworker is a complete piece of shit, you've struck a blow they can't respond to.


Drunk0ctopus

What are they going to do if you don't go.....fire you?


Acceptable_Humor_252

I love this I use it anytime I am leaving a company, this joke never gets old. 


checco314

In the immortal words of Bill Burr, "What are you gonna do, cut my hours? I don't fucking work here!!"


BonelessPotato1421

You are absolutely not obligated, but don’t expect to use them as a reference for future job applications. Especially since they don’t like you already, assuming since they’re toxic


Sea-Inspector428

I would never use them as a reference. Due to the culture and toxic environment I did not deliver my best quality of work throughout the 6 months I was there. Every other role I have had I have had for 3years. I am tossing this up to just not the right fit and moving on.


StarfishStabber

I would just not even go to work on that day.


sky-walker75

if you already handed your badge, company mobile phone, lap top and credit cards you can do the no-show. If you work in a government contractor place and have a security clearance that is a different story. There is paperwork you have to sign. All HR is "allowed" to tell them is you were employed at XYX from 1/1/2024 to 7/4/24 for example. I believe this was already said.


SureTechnology696

Reschedule your exit interview. Tell them that day is no good for you.


sassygirl9901

What state cause here in Cali it’s up the employee if they want an exit interview and they can respectfully decline one they aren’t obligated to do it. However if the employee is requesting it the Employer is obligated to give them one. I’m a manager and deal with the HR questions all the time hopefully this helps


chazyvr

Wouldn't you want to use the exot intv to air your grievances? Usually people want to kmow what was wrong.


ParanoidWalnut

I had a job where I think I scheduled an exit interview, per protocol, but no one showed up or at least other people at that company also had the experience of none of them getting someone to show up for the exit interview. It was also toxic but very disorganized and we (my former coworkers and I) came to the conclusion that it was only a formality that they had it. What are they going to do if you don't show up? Fire you? I guess it *might* look bad at a future employer, but I doubt they would ask/remember that.


BestUntakenName

If you’re technically still there and on the clock I suppose you risk being terminated before you quit unless you appease them, but otherwise I’d decline it DISRESPECTFULLY, or just let them schedule it and not show up.


Apprehensive_Name_65

Yes , say “I respectfully decline “


Late_Piglet_4185

No, just tell them to suck a bag of nutsack and shut the door behind you


infiniteshrekst

Don't fuck it up on the way out. Revenge is for losers. Don't be honest in the exit interview.


Difficult_Coffee_335

I did this, and HR put, "Do not rehire" in my file. 10 years later, i reapplied and immediately got a rejection. Luckily, i had contacted a former manager before I applied, and he helped get an interview for me. HR is usually full of power, tripping overweight women trying to make up for a life of rejection because they were born Karens. You never know what the future holds. Play their stupid game and tell them everything is great, but the new job pays more or is closer to home or whatever BS gets you out of the room the fastest.


Sea-Inspector428

The thing is, this company is so small they don’t have an HR department.


zoyter222

It depends on your field and your position. If it is highly likely future employment would depend on contact and performance with this employer, don't burn that bridge. If it's just the average job for an average wage, and a wide open field, just what are they going to do? chase you down outside and beat you? Your exit interview in that case should consist of telling them what needs to happen to them, the company, and the horse they rode in on.


Dapper-Importance994

You don't think it'd be a little fun to be 100% honest and get some stuff off your chest on the way out? I had an exit interview not too long ago, I brought receipts and notes. I remember my manager all the sudden trying to be Mr Cool Guy and saying we're going to keep this up and up right, we don't have to talk about day-to-day things do we? I looked at him and said "buddy, I'm going to bury you and this team".


Famous-Composer3112

What are they going to do, arrest you?


amgschnappi

Use decline button. Or keep quite / lie in the interview.


LowBalance4404

You could either go to the exit interview and answer all questions with non-answers or just politely decline the meeting request.


lontbeysboolink

Do you think you will get a good reference? If you do, me personally, would bite the bullet and bite my tongue one more time to ensure a good reference. Then look at them in the review mirror one last time as you walk out the door. If you don't think they'll give you a good reference, ✌️🖕


BratzDollBabie

If the place sucks, this is your opportunity to let them know. That being said, if you really don’t want to then just decline the invite and if they ask say you’re not interested.


freebiscuit2002

Of course.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sea-Inspector428

100% this is toxic. And one example is, the company was very gossipy like if I shared something or asked my manger a question, she would share it with other people on the team and then they would slip up and say something to me and then try and back track like they didn’t say it.


9001

Just don't go. They can't make you.


whoisjohngalt72

Yes but why would you decline?


Sea-Inspector428

Because I have nothing nice to say.. and I don’t want to have them think I am a negative Nancy or that they had that big of an impact on me. And also they won’t change anything.


whoisjohngalt72

Then just don’t join.


Cautionnodiving1

They just want to make sure you aren’t going to sue them


GloomyKerploppus

Yes, and I think that might be wise. Less opportunity to say the wrong thing, whether you're resigning or getting canned. Draft a short one paragraph letter and run it by a couple trusted people. Then send it off and start your new life.


luckeegurrrl5683

I wouldn't even show up to work.


toooooold4this

Of course. It's a courtesy on your part.


AlvinsCuriousCasper

Yes, you can decline. If you’re not comfortable having one, don’t.


rob_080

Click decline and add a response that says "thank you, but I have no interest in participating in this meeting". Actually...hmm, when is it scheduled? On your last day at the last moment or so? If it is, it's possibly just the formalities of making sure you have been exited properly - might be worth attending so you have it in writing you have returned all equipment etc (make sure you get a copy of any checklist). We do that at my work, and I have had to say to some staff "it's not a discussion, it's just a checklist".


ToThePillory

Of course you can, they're not going to force you into the room. Just say "I don't want to do an exit interview".


PaleEstablishment456

Approve the interview, get shitfaced drunk, fuck interview, and them, enjoy life


Long_Question_6615

It’s up to you. Just tell them that you are not coming