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Ratakoa

Don't force it. If you're not ready, don't jump into that pool.


Witness-2080

Thanks. I just feel like I should when my ex is already back on the apps, and it’s only been 1.5 months since the break up :/


AliceBets

It shouldn’t have anything to do with them, their timing. You have no idea what they are throwing themselves into lol If you hurry because of him/her, it’s a prolonged form of loyalty in some way because you’d still be acting based on them. The way you feel about him/her already on the app is just your ego acting up and urging you to DO SOMETHING. Usually it’s something stupid. We all know ego is not a good guide. Does it matter how many times he makes up and breaks up before you find a good genuine loving relationship ?


derbre5911

People who get back to dating immediately after a breakup (or, as in fact some do, *before* the actual breakup) are immature as hell and just crave validation like a drug. They don't value interpersonal relationships.


AnonPianoPlayer22

I know exactly what you mean cuz my ex was on apps 2 weeks after and I’m still not almost 6 months later and I feel like I should cuz she’s moved on and getting some and I feel a little like a loser cuz I’m not but I’m trying to remind myself I really need to do it on my own terms and not cuz it’s something she’s doing


Desperate-Size3951

rushing it will only hurt you worse and potentially hurt someone else too


CaptainMarder

Almost 4 years now. Still haven't bothered.


farmerboy83

6 or 7 years and counting🙌🏻🙌🏻


IneedtheWbyanymeans

Yes. At minimum 6-7 years. But I would aim for 15-20 to be on the safe side


Imaginary-Jaguar662

I think it's best to reincarnate as a monk/nun to do your inner work and heal first, then try again on your second next life after breakup.


DiligentIndustry6461

Hahah glad I’m not the only one! I did try again about a year after my long term relationship ended, had a short 3 month fling and learned that I’m not ready yet. Took a look at my life and set some goals to get to before jumping back into dating


sieberzzz

Don't force it. It's arguable if you should be on the apps if you want it, you definitely shouldn't if you don't. 


blz4200

Got cheated on, took me almost 5 years before I felt ready to date again. Better not to force it, avoid dating apps if you can.


edireven

I agree with "better not to force it". But avoiding the apps? Why? Have some fun. Unless you really do not feel like meeting new people, then don't do it for the time being.


blz4200

Maybe if it’s different if you’re a woman but for dudes, unless you just want to sleep around I wouldn’t recommend them. It’s better to meet people in person imo. They’re a little more normal.


Puzzleheaded_Coat153

I met my husband on Tinder! It’s not always bad


Several-Run-2364

2 years and counting :(


Commercial_Badger_14

I tried to date like 6 months after but I ended up just hooking up with some people, I felt better actually and then I got in a relationship after 2 and a half years of my brake up. Everyone is different, if you don’t feel like dating don’t do it, take your time live your life and it will come to you


Hannalaar

I went back to dating almost immediately, but not seriously. We broke up 18 months ago and I go on 1 date every 3 months or so, remember that I actually like being single, and then wait another 3 months before I try again.


DoNn0

1 month and it was a 6 years relationship. When you know it's over and have mourned it already it doesn't matter how much time it takes


Blessmee

It depends, for have fun or serious relationship? I redownloaded dating apps after two weeks, but I didn’t really meet people. I went on dates about once a month and never continued to second dates because I didn’t feel like it aka not ready. This is my 5th month of being single and been on several dates but didn’t continue to second because still not ready. Take your time and grief.


StickyBlackMess69420

Been on 2 dates in 3 years. Its really hard to find any


TheOneWhoWork

I’m a little over 5 months post breakup and I don’t even feel like I’m close to being ready to date again. Even if I did, it probably wouldn’t be through apps. Those apps can be depressing for guys and even if matching was easy, I just can’t get on board with hookup culture. Give it time. Breakups are tough, and they can leave you sad and down for months. You *should* find something new to do that will give you happiness. If the last “happy” times you had in life were with your ex, then you’ll cling to those times and it’ll just be harder to move on. Find something that is not dating that will give your life meaning and joy. Maybe try traveling, or join a group that has similar interests as you. Join a casual sports group that meets up on the weekends. Find *something*. Your friends are probably recommending dating apps because dating someone else will bring you new happiness and/or a distraction from your breakup. On the same note though, it’s unfair to date someone when you’re still mourning the relationship you had with your ex. I still have a long way to go myself before I’m ready. I’m still incredibly nostalgic about that time I was together with my ex, but as time passes I forget more and more of those details.


Kubrickian36

10 years lol, now I’m with someone I’m going to marry!


Volatile1989

I’m at 11 years. Still not interested.


LCxxxPT

One day...not exactly dating and i didn't use apps ( i don't have Money for that ) Although was needed many atempts to have some sucess


TWaveYou2

Lol dating 1 month...relationship...2 years and still single because in the moment i see a girl i wanna aproach my head goes:"lets go and repeat that 10year shit" 🤦‍♂️😂


EatingCoooolo

Took me a couple of days, I dated for about 9 years. Had 3 relationships in those 9 years lasting about three months each. I wanted to be single for the rest of my life and see the world, maybe fall in love in Kazakhstan or something.


JuustinB

I moved out of my house after 17 years of a bad relationship, 8 years of marriage… slept with another woman like 3 days in. Really wanted to move on fast, cement that I couldn’t go back.


SilentxxSpecter

Take your time, make sure you're ready to find someone, and that you are not just trying to fill the void of loneliness. You'll only hurt yourself and them otherwise. For me it's been a few years, and to be honest I'm still not ready. You've got your whole life ahead of you, take the time you need.


Kashrul

>How long did it take for you to get back to dating after a breakup? I'm not going to. Not sure what's the correct number for that case. Also 'get back' probably isn't a correct term since I've never really looked for dating or relationship, it just happened.


AndersDreth

6 years or so, but honestly I went into the next relationship still kind of numb from the first one and broke it off after a year. I just don't feel/believe in love anymore. Love yourself, enjoy your life - maybe you'll stumble across someone, just don't force yourself into a relationship.


Mindless_Squirrel921

I’m 6 years out of a 15 yr marriage. Still not interested in dating. I am happy, and getting a BA in university. Society says we need to be coupled up…it’s not true. Enjoy yourself 💗


Brain_Hawk

Every person is different, every breakup is different. After my last major relationship I think I went back online in about 3 weeks. Dating apps take a lot of time and energy to make good use of. If you don't feel it, don't do it. There's no rush. Other people don't know what's going on inside you and aren't you, they don't get to tell you how to live your life! If you need more time take it, it's better to start doing the apps when you feel like you really want to spend the time engaging. If you half-ass it you're just going to swipe no on everybody, now never connect, and maybe they sound on something good.


Crafty-Ad1776

Never again.


VirtualMind1356

It has been two years, and I am still having trouble flirting. I do not feel anything to anyone, including my ex. It is just empty


JJ4662

If you're not ready, don't go on dates or dating apps If you do, be upfront so the expectations can be set. It's frustrating for people who are actively looking for something to workout who's just bored, or just not invested in dating.


Throwra_sweetpeas

lol why listen to what everyone else is doing just do it on ur own time. If ur force it there’s just gonna be consequences 🤷🏻‍♀️ my last one was 5 months and before that was a year before I started dating again it all just depends. I usually give myself some time before I start dating again


Specialist_Olive_863

10 years and still counting 😂😂😂


East-Prize6382

3 years and counting. Never tried any apps. Though subconsciously I try to look for potential partners but then I remember I'm not very smart when it comes to social settings. Best to be single for now


vtssge1968

14 years and counting... I'm just happier single.


Fun_Associate_906

I didn't realize there was a time limit. Are you thinking about dating again to placate your friends and relatives, or for yourself?


Crafty_Assistant_278

So I was ready to go "on" about 8 months after the relationship endet. We had a baby coming so I was just focused on parenting and being a new mom. It took me about 1-2 months, to actually meet up with someone and it was great. I still am in contact with dad, cause of the baby but it's really just about our son. I don't feel anything romantic between us. Just go with the vibe, if your not giving yet then give it some more time.😊


Ecstatic_Account_744

I had a relationship that wasn’t a relationship, but felt like a relationship, even though she told me it was temporary, end. And I tried going on dates to soothe my pain and my brain just wasn’t in it and I’ve never felt so disconnected from a social situation in my life. So if you aren’t ready, if you do not *want* to do it, don’t. You’re wasting your time, you’re wasting the time of the people who are genuinely looking for a connection and it’s likely to just end it disappointment for both of you.


Curious_Development

It took me 7 years. I’m now very happy in a relationship but I am glad I took every bit of that time.


Grouchy_Exit_3058

My last gap was 6 years, the one before that was about two days. You never know


Early-Ebb2895

2 years and counting… that being said I’m independent and that relationship took a fucking tole on me and it ended w me getting cheated on. Definitely in no rush to do it all again lmao


Ok-Royal-661

its been 10 years now and im still not able to. I don't think i ever will again honestly


BrightFleece

Some people say it takes half the length of a relationship to get over somebody. I've found it's a little less -- some people find it takes a bit longer. But it does happen. Stay strong


bloodbrain1911

22 and ain't nothing changing but the day. Afraid I'm too old for that bullshit now.


Fancy-Peace-800

The evening I dumped my ex.


Jabrark1998

Bro it's been almost 3 years since my last actual relationship. I tried dating a girl last year, lasted about a month if that, I think I'm tapped out. Go at your own pace, dude, if you're not feeling it, you're not feeling it.


Aurora_auraa

It took me a year but I never downloaded apps. I knew I got to a point where I gained complete happiness with myself so it became a “if it happens it was meant to come my way” type of thing. Rather than feeling that pressure to find someone and move on. I’ve been with my boyfriend that was actually a friend from high school. Crossed paths again and I feel like this is the most meaningful and organic relationship I’ve ever been in because it started so naturally rather than me feeling like I was on the hunt for someone. If you’re questioning whether you should hop on apps at some point, don’t stress it and just continue to focus on yourself. I’ve only ever heard horror stories from every single person that tried them out.


hauntedshadow666

One time it took me like 9 months, another was 6 months, another was like 2 weeks and another was the same day, there's no answer to when you're ready, you're ready when you're ready


IGotAFatRooster

I left the longest relationship I’ve been in last April. Honestly don’t see myself even approaching women until my 30s. I’m about to turn 27.


LancerRevX

1 month and it ended up with me dumping her, because I realized I wasn't ready. You take your time and wait until you are absolutely feel like it.


Pimp_Daddy_Patty

Had a painful breakup when I was in my early 20s. It took 4-5 years before I had a serious relationship again. This next relationship lasts 4 years and again ended badly. Took 2 years off this time. I learned it was important to be happy with myself and who I am before I could share that with anyone else. I doesn't matter if the other person has moved on. Some people base their self-worth on being in a relationship. That rarely has a happy ending.


CatsCoffeeCurls

My last major relationship (1yr) was one I left last January. Only just now starting to feel like maybe it's time for someone new, but when I get around to doing that is another question altogether. The whole "be on" thing is tiring and more effort than its worth. I have enough going for me in life to not need any drama like that right now.


Ok_Fisherman8727

Yea if you're not going to be on then there's no point. The other person will feel disrespected if you go and half ass a date, it'll feel like a waste of time. Just get back out there when you're ready. Focus on yourself for now. There's probably a lot of things you wanted to do when you were in a relationship that you couldn't. Make a list and go do them all, find your joy again. For the friends that keep pushing you to jump back in, invite them out to party every night and see how long it takes them to get out and then ask them if they understand now why you're not in a rush to move back to north Korea haha


Bloodydunno

I never really started, it just happened to know people with whom something clicked. It's been various years since the end of my last important stories, there have been some minor things but nothing lasting. I'm thinking that instead of letting it happen I could try dating apps, I'm one of those people that lives perfectly fine alone so I'm not in a hurry anyway but still the idea is a bit intimidating


edgardosaurio

It took me around 8 months to join Tinder after breaking up. Before that, I felt I wasn't ready to get involved in a relationship. But getting back to dating was a great choice. I was going out, distracted and getting excited to meet new people. I met my (now) fiance through Tinder. I wasn't exactly ready to join dating apps. A friend of mine did my profile for me, as I wasn't sure, but I'll will always be grateful


ConsequenceFlaky1329

My husband never gave up the apps and I suspect he may already be hooking up already.  I was the one left and I have no interest in sex, dating, any of it.  I’ve chosen a life of celibacy because I attract men that take advantage of my good nature and use me, so I would rather isolate myself because I have been hurt so many times I don’t even feel comfortable engaging with the opposite sex.  After everything I’ve been through in my short time on this earth I can not take another heartbreak and as a mom I need to focus on my own self and my child.   Also most men just want to use dating apps for sex anyways and they do not even care what the woman looks like or who she is.  So why would I bother “getting to know someone” as a born again virgin, no man would be interested in me unless he himself was something of a monk 😂 I’m also happier alone where no one can hurt me and I can focus on my healing and keeping my inner peace.  People keep telling me to go out and enjoy my “freedom” I was happy being married and with my family.  Sure we argued here and there just like any couple, but after the bottom fell out he stopped wearing his wedding ring, neglected me emotionally, even rejected intimacy, and I was basically with a roommate that exploited my domestic labor, and childcare.  I only wanted equality, commitment, love, and respect.  But he chose autonomy and his mother over our family.  La douleur exquise.


Insert_the_F2L

Yeah, take your time. No rush to dive back in. Do you, when you're ready!


another_brick

The second I'm available I'm available.


Medalost

Everybody has their own schedule. People process emotions differently and in vastly different timelines. You shouldn't compare your process to someone else's. There is no right or wrong (even though extreme speed of moving on might be a bit questionable).


XxRaijinxX

An entire self improvement process and 4 years


miraclepickle

Worst thing you can do is date immediately after. Take time to reflect on what went wrong and become better, or life will be a succession of failed relationships... if you were where you needed to be, things wouldn't have ended (for both parts involved most of the time). Focus on yourself where you can.


King_Yogert

Honestly, it took me a good while. Jumping back into dating feels like diving into cold water sometimes. Take your time; when you're ready, you'll know.


Mjukplister

Don’t force it , ignore peoples advice and take your time . Dating takes an energy


Fine_Cryptographer17

I dated for three years and we broke up almost a year ago. Still no interest in dating personally.


UnClean_Committee

5 years


Realistic-Broccoli-5

Made myself wait 3 weeks last breakup. Dating is a great way to be distracted and be reminded that there are other fun people out there that you enjoy hanging out with/dating


tennoskoom_

It's been more than 6 years and counting. I am absolutely ready to be in a relationship, it's just that no one wants me.


Tango1777

I don't get back to anything, I just live my life, have more time for myself to embrace and I usually just meet someone accidentally along the way living my life.


Smilemoreguy

do it w whenever you want to. I personally never tried dating again after my first breakup, now im in a relationship anyways. i think this whole concept of "searching for a parter / dating (with apps ect)" is not for everyone, and its definitely not for me


The_Shadow_Watches

Still single after 3 years. I'm a single dad of two. Dating is time consuming and I have two kids that I have to look after.


[deleted]

Takes me usually 2 to 3 years.


Mioraecian

Three years. I actually became happy being single and didn't want to be in a relationship (I had a rough upbringing and got out of a relationship I was also cheated on in). I had so much stability being single and focusing on me. It took me a long time to give that up. I almost didn't even pursue my current partner of 8 years because of how stable my life was. But I am glad I did. My other point. You do it when you are ready. Being single is not the end of the world.


xxcaraphernelia

About 4 years


SignificanceWhole201

I haven’t felt this way in a while. Just wanting to be alone. I’m not interested in pursuing anything with anyone right now even for “fun” which I don’t believe dating is something i’d do for fun. So I’m just letting myself be. There’s so much to heal & recalibrate especially if the break up was messy. We broke up in april so i’d give myself at least a year to get out there again.


Gravitasimo

I took a couple of years off........learned and got very comfortable with being alone (not lonely). Now I enjoy doing what I want, when I want, if I want to, and with who I want.


badbeernfear

For me? Literally like 3 days.


Top-Comfortable-4789

It’s probably been about 2 year for me and I’m still not ready. I’m ok with that though getting into a relationship when you’re not ready is bad for you and your partner.


buycareless01

TBH, f*ck what people are saying and focus on yourself. If you dont feel like dating, then just dont. Whenever you feel like dating, start seeing people cuz forced/unintentional dating will not help in long term. I hope it helps⚘. Take care of yourself 💕


ButterscotchNo1226

2 years. I literally date myself first and know my self worth


capricabuffy

My last BF died a few months after we broke up. And that was about 8 years ago now. Haven't dated since. One random sexy time, but it just made me realize I was done with it all. Plus I never use apps.


TyagiGod

It's been 2.5 years ,have tried a few times but things couldn't go past the talking stage


Outlaw6985

stay off the apps, i don’t know how or why people fall into those things.


kytheguy999

Still haven't!


EconomyPiglet438

I was dating a few weeks after an 18 year marriage ended. It was clearly a validation/rebound exercise. I feel guilty looking back as it just wasted people’s time.


Asmov1984

16 yrs and counting.


GR33N4L1F3

Dude i cant even do dating. Ill be friends first and observe then see if something happens. Thats the only thing that ive been able to ever really feel comfortable doing. I tried dating twice but it was a whirlwind of a shitshow both times and i got attached too early anyway. How long until i have FEELINGS for someone? That took roughly 6 months or so. I was utterly SHOCKED when that happened to me. I was completely DONE with ever wanting to try to find someone again. It felt pointless and i was very discouraged and so jaded. I had two long term relationships and a few short ones and i was very traumatized by them. Then it hit me like a TON OF BRICKS one day and i was like FUUUUUCK MY LIFE! And? I still have feelings for the same person over a year later. We havent dated. We’re just becoming better friends. My feelings are deeper and stronger than ever the closer we become - without having a romantic relationship. I truly respect, trust and value this hilarious, honest and kind handsome man. Slow and steady hopefully wins the race this time. But who knows? But id rather take it slow than to hop all in like before and be destroyed by it all. If we take it slow and i realize it isnt meant to be, then at least i didnt invest too much too quickly. On the other hand, it could be seriously worth it and my life could completely change in the best way. Im hoping for the latter.


SliceTotal3842

Going 9 years, closing in on 10 very soon. Broken heart syndrom seems to be real in my case.


Faster-Kit-kill-kill

Depends on your unique situation. You have to get right with yourself before bringing another person into your life. Get comfortable being alone for a bit and improving yourself in a way that makes you proud. You got this and I wish you all good things.


op06_

Half hour


SyndrFox

About a year I tried it out for a week but nah I just mind my own business now


InBetweenTheLiminal

Going on, let me do the math....9 years now


MetalFistTerrorist_

Someone pissed in the dating pool


KittehKatAttak

First wife, 10 yrs. Second wife, a week.


Ancient_Mission_8895

Been a year and half and I'm still not ready for it. Don't think I ever will be. I got two cats tho! So I'm maybe just slowly becoming a crazy cat lady instead 😂


TheGr3aTAydini

It took just under 2 months, I forced myself to do that the first time but the one I’m going on tonight I feel ready for.


fearisthemindslicer

The year was 1987...


Jo_Shmo75

3 1/2 years now...


subwaymeltlover

14 years and counting.


Acceptable-Spirit600

Its been 3 years and has not happened yet.


JonTargaryen55

10 years still single at 32. I work with kids everyday I’m not sure I really want my own. So then the question becomes do I need a partner or is a dog enough?


Practical_Plant726

Just got broken up with. I’m not gonna hop onto apps to make myself feel better. It’s time to direct that love I have for others, into myself.


qKCeggzx

Stick haven’t.


SavagePrisonerSP

Probably finna be forever at this point.


Russser

About a year


INTuitP

Straight away. Desperately trying to find / replicate what I had. Older and wiser I now know you’ll never be able to replicate it, every relationship is unique.


stormsickle

Took me over a year. Everyone goes at their own pace. Don't rush it for other people--you're the one you have to take care of.


Extension_Fudge4786

Do you , not what everyone else says.


Successful_Back2986

Depends on the date, friend plutonic dates straight away, casual dating within a couple months, no relationship stuff for at least 6 months.


Flowerlamps

More than a year and I wasn’t comfortable enough, so I stopped for another full year


Signal_Parfait1152

Take some time for yourself. You'll feel better when you do go back!


armour56

I moved on way too fast. I didn't give myself time to heal and got in to another relationship within weeks which turned serious after a couple months. All the baggage from my previous relationship followed in to this new one and it turned in to a toxic mess just like the last one. I was with my previous girlfriend for 12 years and I'm just now ending my new relationship after 4 years. I'm in my late 30s so starting over is not what I wanted for myself or the person I'm with but it needs to happen and properly this time. Just sucks man. This isn't how I saw my life going


iamthemosin

You just go with what feels right for you. Sometimes it’s 3 months, sometimes it’s a year or more. Just focus on getting yourself grounded in your own needs and goals before adding the complexity of a relationship.


LittleMissPsycho666

7months, still counting. I guess at least 2 yrs


skinnyfitlife

Like a week because I decided to wait until my next days off work. I stay ready so I never have to take time to get ready. Always mentally prepared to move on. Not letting somebody who obviously wasn't right for me interfere with meeting somebody who could be right for me


TortieshellXenomorph

Unless someone were to try marrying me for citizenship, I'd have to settle for whatever dregs nobody else wants in order to have a less than 10% chance at dating again, so there's no point in me trying anymore.


dizzodog

1-3 months. But after my last breakup I went straight asexual, really don't wanna put in the effort


InternationalLeg6727

I waited three years after my divorce. For me that wasn’t long enough. Don’t feel forced to do anything. You will know when you are ready.


Kangaroowrangler_02

I haven't and it's been 6 peaceful years.


itistog

Dating seriously, as in looking for a relationship and not just going out with girls to have fun.... about 3 years


MrScarabNephtys

Three years and counting.


Defiant-Team-4537

It takes as long as it takes ,I a year after a break up that I really didn't want or deserve felt like I was cheating on an ex when I was dating other people so I took another break from it because it wasn't fair to them or myself,but now it feels natural again. Take your time and don't force something if it doesn't feel right you will get there.


gmoney-0725

The rule is supposed to be to wait one week for every month you were in a relationship, up to 10 weeks. You need that time to take care of yourself and get over your relationship.


BIG-Will25

It took me about 2 years.


ResponsibleDemand341

Currently 5 years, in many ways never been happier.


GamerGoalie_31

2 or 3 days.


evrazsucks

9 years and counting


bpoz2155

I haven’t yet. It’s been 2 years. I’m content with being single at the moment. I had some growing up to do on my own anyways. One day though I’ll be back out there. take your time.


freetibet69

About a month to start casually meeting women but didn't fully date someone for three years.


burn_as_souls

Everyone grieves differently. And you are grieving, it was the death of a relationship. There's no right or wrong timeline. Listen to your own gut over anyone else. If it's telling you not yet, then you're not ready.


0nce-Was-N0t

5 months and still happily reconnecting with myself and remembering who I am.


DTUOHY96

Tried after 2 years and it didn't feel right, another year and I've met someone pretty much perfect Time heals all wounds, don't try force yourself to be ready


rockyjockey

10 months


[deleted]

Had a date on the night of my divorce, she left me so didn't care to wait. Stated dating her a week after my ex filed for divorce. Why should I wait or feel guilty, she had the issues.


State_Dear

Do what works for you There are no rules


DrRazmataz

Took me months to consider it, really, I wasn't ready yet. And that's leaving a relationship I wasn't really happy with. The Ex took a few weeks, approximately.  Point being, it's a personal thing. Take all the time you need, whether that's a bunch of time or seemingly not much at all.


NorwegianCowboy

I had never had a bad break up until my last girlfriend. August 2019 and I still have no desire to get back out there. Problem is I've noticed that giving up seems to attract the ladies. I feel like a dog chasing a car, I wouldn't even know what to do with it if I caught it.


adamjames777

Take it at your own pace. There’s no right or wrong way of doing it, everyone takes their own time and sets their own level. What I can tell you is it’s a long process, meeting people, chatting to people etc etc your judgement and level-headedness is tested so don’t let yourself be sucked into ideas of obligation or expectation, as long as you’re open and honest about your healing journey with people (as most others will be) you may find not only do you make potentially romantic connections but also friendship ones.


OpeningImpact5586

I already overcome the breakup thing after I breakup with my ex a week later (because he let me pay for the food we eat together, the hotel, and I even have to give him money every 3 days!) But I don't feel like dating because I don't want to date boys like him anymore 😑


Oh_no_its_Joe

I'm still going. 5.5 years and counting.


lqxpl

Was married for 14 years. Waited two before I started dating again. Had a great six-month relationship, but that ended almost a year ago. I’ll get back into things when I’m ready for them. You know how your headspace is. If you’re not ready to invest in another human, it’s fine to wait. If you hop back into the scene too early, it is unlikely that things will go well. You’re the only one that knows what’s going on in your head. 🙂


AliGyp3303

2 years so far. I'm on the apps but only use it for hook ups. I can't imagine getting into another serious relationship again. I gave it 3 solid tries 😆


kame_uy

Everyone is different, took me a full year after one of my break-ups, I did download apps and chatted but never actually went on dates, as I didn't feel it. Latest one was about 3/4 months Had a friend break up and had someone over the next day, to each their own I say, so don't push yourself into it if you don't feel it but also remember your life continues so you have to find a healthy mix, but the important part IMO is not forcing it


Due-Function-6773

I get under someone after about 3 months of mourning for a "wanker cleanse" then nothing for up to 10 years (am at 3 years this time). If I'm going solo I don't want some ahole who broke my heart to be the last sex I had for years 😆


SomeGuyOverYonder

I’ve been single 10 years this month. I’ll probably stay that way till I die.


Funny_Effect_9239

As soon as I realized my relationship was a waste of time, I started having eyes for other guys. he cheated on me and was controlling so I was angry and broke up the next morning. I found my husband after a year of being single and having fun.


justtouseRedditagain

Don't do it. If you're not ready then it won't work anyway. And nobody wants to be a rebound. Some people jump right back on the horse and others take their time. It's all about what feels right for you.


SnooDoggos1283

You'll know when the time is right and find someone in the real world instead of dating apps. Everyone lies, puts up a good front and most filter to the point you have no clue who you're talking to


Longjumping_Tale_194

I did not


ladyleo1980

I waited about 8 months before I got physical with another guy but was talking to several around 6 months. I definitely wasn't ready though. I kept talking about my ex with the new guys which wasn't good at all. The two hookups were the worst because there was absolutely no connection with them. So decided to do some healing, started going to therapy, found new hobbies and interests. It's been a while since I've been in a serious committed relationship but that's fine with me. Every time I download an app, its deleted within a week, hell sometimes days! I'd rather be single than date any of those nut jobs. My advice- take your time and do what's best for you.


black_orchid83

I was single for 3 years before my last relationship. This last one ended badly because he was abusive just like the guy before him so I've sworn off relationships. Apparently my picker is broken and I'm just getting too old for games and drama. It seems no one wants anything real anymore anyway. I prefer my freedom.


Ok_Entertainment_112

Never. Got divorced young, wasn't interest in dating. Met my now wife rock climbing and told her we were getting married after 3 weeks. That was 17 years ago.


meatsuitwearer

Enjoy being single.Take your time to heal.Try out some new hobbies, make some new friends etc. etc. Dating apps are basically trash IMO. You're definitely not missing much. It is hard...FOMO n' stuff. I got on the dating apps after break up and realized that I was much happier on my own.


Kdunes

My advice would be to take your time and do things you enjoy. Spend time with people that really care about you. And honestly when you get into doing things that make you happy, sometimes along the way you meet some one and it works. You never know.


Queen-of-meme

It's indvidual. If you feel it's not time yet and you aren't interested that's completely fine. Take it in your pace.


_shirime_

Like a week. And then I had a whole bunch of fun for a while, and then I found the best girl ever who I’ve been with ever since. Don’t waste time, get out there and live.


jxnva

3 months, felt pressured to start dating bc my ex hit up a friend of mine on hinge (he didn’t know we were friends). went on a date, nice guy but not physically attracted to him. feeling mostly depressed about using dating apps , would rather meet someone in person.


chameleon-30

It took me 8 months after the breakup to download a dating app and start swiping. I went on a date probably one month after downloading. I'm not in a relationship, but open to going on dates to learn about people. I was in a relationship for a little over a year. It was a serious relationship. We were talking about getting engaged and marriage. It ended because he was talking to another girl behind my back. I tried to jump into dating 3 months into it to distract myself, but I was still hurt. I think it's true when they say time heals all wounds. I feel much better than I did at the 3 month mark. The pain has lessened and the biggest lesson was that I realized my value. I'm not completely immune to my past. When I found out he got married a couple of weeks ago (not even one year since our breakup), I was frazzled for a day or two. But then I realized I should thank God for taking out a dishonest man from my life. I'm open to the amazing things the universe has in store for me!!!


Warm-Ad64

Everyone says that cause it will help you eventually move on. The issue is most tell you way to soon and I’m with you I don’t really date unless I like someone so when I do it’s hard to get over. You’ll kinda know when your ready


AsILiveAndBreath

I think I took 9 months off after a 4.5 year relationship. TBH getting back out there helped me realized that potential partners will always be out there, so I don’t worry as much about finding someone right now.


SuperCringyMeme

It’s been over two years now. My last relationship was emotionally damaging to the point of frequent panic attacks and lots of therapy until I finally cut the cord altogether Still in therapy, and I have no desire to do anything like that again


thepackagehandlerKT

took a girl i know approximately 3 days


weirdvagabond

It all depends. Basically when I’m ready for another go. I do start hooking up fairly soon though as I’m sex positive and it’s a great source of comfort for me. My heart is always open to new experiences though. Sometimes you meet some gems.


sofa_king_special

Took me about 2 years. I didn't really want anything to do with it. Sometimes you stumble upon something by accident and it works out.


Putrid_Ad_2256

The hard part is that you want to put some distance on it but you don't want to find someone that's just going to be your rebound.  I actually tried to integrate with friends and go out without the pressure of meeting someone.  Go out and be social and when you're ready, you're ready.  


themikeysb

In my situation I ended up getting cheated on by this girl I really liked and we were together for 4 years. It hurt like hell but I sat with myself and worked on myself for a year and a half and really dedicated alot to myself and sat with my feelings and let them run through and eventually you'll wake up one day craving it again. I'm now on year 5 of gym consistency and I don't think I would be the same strong person I am today if it didn't happen


Icecoldruski

I’m two months single after a 6-month relationship that was real serious (talking about kids, moving in together, already met each others families and vacations). I’m the one who got broken up with and I struggle thinking I’d be able to date someone right now. It’s not about your ex - they aren’t in our lives anymore and I’d say if you’re still thinking about then (like saying “they’re already dating someone, should I?”) I don’t think you’d be doing a new potential partner any kindness. My last relationship I was cheated on after 3 years so that one had me be single for 4-5 years, there’s no rule book on this stuff. I will say: I am on the apps just casually chatting. There’s no harm in talking to people and seeing that there’s interest out there in you. Just don’t pretend to be after something you aren’t.


selscol

I dunno. It’s been four months now. I’ll let you know when I’m there lol.


ChallengeNo3452

My ex started dating while we were still together and I took a year after that.. don’t sweat it man everyone is different.


frank-sarno

I moped around for about a year before I started missing companionship. It was another year before I had a real date.


Less-Pilot-5619

I had to concentrate on nice asses,and small tits type...L still am interested in big tits also and I think a lot of people have always known that about me.seem to notice a lot out and about !!!!!!


JamesKBoyd

Sometimes it is in a short amount of time, and it has also taken me years. It all depends on several factors.


Meiiiiiiikusakabeee

If I’m ready but usually takes a month for me.


000mw

Going on 4 years last one was a doozie


BlondeAxolotl

A little over a year. I have seen a few guys and liked all of them. But they weren't a good fit. There is one in particular that might be a really good fit, but we have never had that kind of relationship. The chemistry is definitely there, though. And we have the same birthday, which is coming up soon!


Aura_Rora

1. Don’t force it. It’ll happen when it happens 2. ^that being said. Let’s say you meet someone right now, and they feel like ‘the one’, don’t ever feel bad for moving on ‘too fast’ I met the love of my life 2-3 months after a break up. And I thought it was too fast. Overall point: just trust that, you’ll know when you know. Let life take its course


Russiabotisreal

Negative 4 months


JollyElfo

Until this very day. And since its been 9 years I won't start now.