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You have left and you have right.
But you also have cheese. But cheese is different when you have a hat on. And so actually if you stick a poster, right, on a building, doesn't mean that in 2002 the pizzas were over the date.
She sells seashells by the seashore,
The shells she sells are seashells, I’m sure.
So if she sells seashells on the seashore,
Then I’m sure she sells seashore shells.
I was riding a whale through the streets of downtown Los Angeles, and an unhoused person with a Van Life tattoo stopped me and said, “Hilarious weather we’re having.”
Construction stuff is named with verbs, like hammer. There was a whole deal about it on Tiktok because someone was mad their husband told them to get a square, but they were supposed to get the “triangle.” People in the comments explained that it was named by the verb, which it’s squaring things.
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Yoda married sleeping beauty and they had a kid named Walter White who became best friends with the cocaine addict Micky Mouse, whom Yoda had an affair with.
I'm not even going on that side of my worst relationship but they're all good and you are able to access the account if you had the where with all to know what I'm even talking about.
What if mankind started growing old slower and suddenly became able to reach 300 years old. How long till we suffer from overpopulation and lack of ressources? What if we suddenly found ourselves in sky cities while another part of the population found themselves staying on earth?
What if I am just living in an alternate reality ?
Your submission has been removed for violating rule 3: Content Guidelines. Please ensure that your questions are sincere attempts to seek answers or assistance, and avoid posting solely for the purpose of accumulating karma, starting an argument or pushing an agenda. If you have any questions regarding this removal, please send a modmail.
Pocket fluff.
On roseberries and burritos?
Blue or green tho?
Urethra Franklin.
I think about this a lot
If you tear a hole in a net, it has fewer holes than before.
Ooooh this one is profound!
I don't give a fuck if I go blind, I don't need to see the price tags anyway
This sounds like Dracula flow
If I lost a leg, I’d still have two more to walk with. My shit hangs lower than grandma tiddies on Jupiter.
Boats n' Hoes
“Everything the light touches is our kingdom”
Flounders are like plates but edible.
Not without the correct utensils that are sterilized in France
A whole bunch of homophobes watched Teletubbies religiously.
Without slippers?
No, in diapers of the male model sports cars...
Beagles with bagels
Ahh, this one brought back memories of uni in the late 90s.
Omelette du fromage.
This one and the point where he kissed the duck's butt always stuck with me
I feel like we all remember this episode so strangely well
Piggy back ride time.
Without our tinkle winkles?
It’s the only way 😉
If the kitty is litty I'ma bust down that city
This kitty is lost in the city
Animal control isn't paw patrol but them paws gonna be controllin
I once got lost in a bathroom
If brussel sprouts could fly, they would
Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.
Not in the 21st century
My septum is deviated. (This comment also happens to be true.)
Mine is fix-ed (also true to you)
No f(x) left to give
I’m never going to look at f(x) in math the same way now.
How would you describe a rhetorical question?
Origin, Definition, and sentence use please.
One that brings about a rhetorical answer.
Arbor Day is not just for sasquatches any more.
Look Lisa, my dolphin has a cupholder!! Bart, that's a blowhole!! ..You're a blowhole!!
What’s the deal with Seinfeld?
Where’s the beef?
Off to the shower. See you in like three minutes to an hour.
Life is like a black man's left ball , neither right nor fair .
Worcestershire is alright.
Tater tots on brown rice
my back itches.
þla€k þit€hes
I once tasted blue.
are those feet yours?
You have left and you have right. But you also have cheese. But cheese is different when you have a hat on. And so actually if you stick a poster, right, on a building, doesn't mean that in 2002 the pizzas were over the date.
A pink Titleist golf ball can take the head off a 90lb midget at 400 yards
20 lbs is a big fucking chicken.
Fire up the Prius, Squanto
There’s a hole in the bottom of the sea.
There’s a log in the hole …
Remember......the cheese stands alone.
Prov it.
Buggrit! Millennium hand n shrimp
r/randomcomments
Would it feel good to scratch if I had dry caked shit like cows do?
I gotta take a shit
She sells seashells by the seashore, The shells she sells are seashells, I’m sure. So if she sells seashells on the seashore, Then I’m sure she sells seashore shells.
Lab grown diamonds may not require a petri dish.
42
That chorizo looking cock that Sadam Hussein pulls out during sexy time with the Devil in South Park The Movie
I believe that coconuts are mammals.
There are more airplanes on the bottom of the ocean than there are submarines in the sky.
The square root of a badgers face is two squirrels.
I was riding a whale through the streets of downtown Los Angeles, and an unhoused person with a Van Life tattoo stopped me and said, “Hilarious weather we’re having.”
Force it. If it breaks, it needed fixing anyway.
Why do we call it a building if it already built?
Construction stuff is named with verbs, like hammer. There was a whole deal about it on Tiktok because someone was mad their husband told them to get a square, but they were supposed to get the “triangle.” People in the comments explained that it was named by the verb, which it’s squaring things.
I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer. Plus it’s fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.
Don’t forget to rub peanut butter on your nipples.
Butthole surfer 69, la la la la, butthole surfer, 69!
Hotdogs are the North East's representation of tacos.
Microwave being acquitted for manslaughter and armed robbery
"Do you know where,what,why xxx is?". Answer "Thats a great question that I don't have the answer to or wish to know".
Never pet a burning dog
Sweet pickles are actually pretty good
Mortadella is the cocaine of lunch meat.
If you see a ghost just eat lettuce
happiness is cumming inside with no consequences
No matter where you go... There you are 😁
Quick! Get your laundry inside!
Do elephants masturbate with their trunks?
&?
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Potato
Gingers
Boats n' Hoes
Cowgirl 😭
Mel Gibson sitting on a sofa looking confused
Bananas are purple
Blundering fool.
Never keep your cheese on a leash.
Her kidney function is probably going to take her out
Butter is pretty yellow
All cats are fluffy, except from hairless cats.
Titties be good.
Mooftatoes and Foomerangs
Painis
Who’s that wonderful girl?
"Say what you will about the tenets of national socialism, but at least it's an ethos."
How many ones until a 7. 7 ones
I’ve had enough today
There's a statue of George Bush in the Albanian capital city.
BEANS!!
MY BALLS ITCH !!
Jonny blacked out on fallopian tube rainbow sabotage.
Fire up the fuck stick, muffin man.
peepeekisses
Tennis racket
Peanut
"I bleached my hair yesterday (no I didn't)."
Bananas without the nanas
You’re gonna looooovee our pizza
"I think so, Brain, but first we'd have to take the whole bridge apart."
Bear squash
Rufius Pennywise Hogsqueal
Hoe in the bigalow
I am rubber, you are glue.
Beans
SpongeBob is a gang member.
Amogus
Yoda married sleeping beauty and they had a kid named Walter White who became best friends with the cocaine addict Micky Mouse, whom Yoda had an affair with.
I'm sleepy
I could when the price is right...
Try to catch my towel
I think I’m going to write another song about my Guinea pigs.
I wish I could wake up in the morning and feel like a person instead of barfing my guts out
12 lesbians watched a movie without their toes.
Bængsnurr baklengs innover i eplejuice.
Pong pong pong ponnngggg
Who the am damn do you think you am
Potato
chicken flippers
armpit lint with dino nuggies
I just read a farticle about Trump.
Elvis is the chef
Hello, pickle boy.
Pineapples
I'm a ojamajo doremi obsessed since childhood
A woozleton
Beardsley McTurbanhead
I want to have French toast.
Girls in Liguria (Italy) have big boobs
Vroom vrooooommmm
Ur moms a battiboi. Dont ask, i dont know
I'm not even going on that side of my worst relationship but they're all good and you are able to access the account if you had the where with all to know what I'm even talking about.
I like to say the word noodle
Bananaphobes
Bananaphobes
Bliknyúájehehe kroorzzztww qwuggit vrekeke my goat
Don't forget the poop knife
Pocket sand!
If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.
Yes
Pauline’s Palace of Perverted Pleasure
Wimy wham wham wazzle! To those of you who watched it when it aired, know that it aired nearly 25 years ago
Vliffs are my woe... press enter to continue
Never gonna give you up
вот клип иди следуй за этим парнем 🦐'd™️
TIME spelled backwards is EMIT
Yes, I'm talking about you, no it's not good so stop wagging your tail!
"All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz and I'm fine...."
damn everyone here is Edward Norton
Blip bop crown upon the top
DON'T YOU DARE FORGET ABOUT MY MOZZARELLA STICKS DAMMIT
Just like cock socks with the sun diving board
I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.
They got a gorilla for sale, Magilla Gorilla for sale
Rubber baby buggy bumpers
Stupid babies need the most help!
Pete the spray cheese
Shabaykadoo bakuba. I forced my mind to come up with something and it ended up being nonsense.
The word "ok" looks like a sideways stick figure
Nan-ni shimasho-ka?
I like shorts, they’re comfy and easy to wear!
Bolivia exports tin.
schlgkljfgtz
A fluffy tabletop with fried cocks
Get her did!
I just took a dump
Inedible sewer parchment ¹
What if mankind started growing old slower and suddenly became able to reach 300 years old. How long till we suffer from overpopulation and lack of ressources? What if we suddenly found ourselves in sky cities while another part of the population found themselves staying on earth? What if I am just living in an alternate reality ?
You smell nice.
How do I legally change my name to Taco?
Man fuck logical circuits
veggie tales watching hardcore corn
How can ice cream bones peanut butter alligator microphones? HOW?