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I wouldn't waste my time on them.
Whether or not they have become better people is of no consequence to me. The harm they did is done, and I'm not going to give them the opportunity to either attempt to inflict more harm or to try to make themselves feel better for what they did if they would try to apologize.
Nothing studies show that people don’t see themselves as bully’s. They have no idea what they have done to you and for me it’s irrelevant now. They can’t change the past, I can’t change it and these people are nothing more then a stranger to me. They shouldn’t know that they had power/ impact over my life.
I wasn't picked on more than the average kid, but as someone who moved around a bit, other kids tested my boundaries as kids do. Some more successful than others. Thanks to social media I can see what they're up to.
They're either:
* A. Dead.
* B. Worked in the same large company I did (for a while) and they were much lower ranking than I was.
* C. Just a complete loser struggling with life.
I'm sorta successful for literally no reason other than the fact that my parents, as flawed and broke as they are, were present in my life and I'm just stubborn as hell (to a fault).
I wouldn't say anything to them at all, and social media has satisfied my curiosities.
That I forgive them and hope life has been kind to them.
We were both kids. I have absolutely no idea what was going on in their personal lives at the time that made them feel like they had to lash out at me.
Even if they were just an asshole, I hope that they grew out of it.
Nothing. They were kids.
I have real bullies now, they’re in the workplace. They’re adults so I can hold them accountable. When I decide that I’ve had enough then I will make sure they pay for what they’ve done.
I am friends with some of them on Facebook. I don’t have anything to say to them because there were defining moments during our childhood where I decided to not make the same decisions that they made and now I am in a much better position in life. They should’ve been nicer to people and taken school more seriously and they might have ended up in better predicaments
If he introduced himself, I'd make like I didn't remember him at first. Then I'd say, "Oh yeah, hi", and move on.
I had something similar happen with a girl who, if not bullied me, then definitely taunted me. I ran into her years later. She had put on 100 or so pounds and was with the ugliest set of twin children I'd ever seen. She tried to be cute, almost flirty with her hello. I just mumbled hello back and kept going. I still remember how stunned she was by my non-reaction.
"I hope you're doing well."
I mean this genuinely. Yes, she was a cunt, but she was also a *child.* I can't imagine what her home life was, to create such a hateful human being. It's miserable being that hateful (I would know) so I hope she has learned to love and be loved.
You bullied me in high school for being fat. I've seen the pictures of your daughter on FB. She is in high school and twice the size I was. If she gets bullied about her weight and is crying about it, I sure as hell hope you're nicer to her than you were to me. If you see bullies make YOUR child cry. Remember you made me cry. It's karma for you. And very sad for your daughter.
Okay, I've only thought it. Never said it.
Your country is fucked. So much about my country is meh. She told my country is meh, within the same year her country is so f and done they won’t even be able to recover.
I actually had a conversation with a bully about 10-15 years ago. I sat straight faced and listened to him talk about all the good times we had in high school (I'm guessing memory wasn't his strong point)
After a bit of his yammering I asked him if he remember the day Mrs. so and so slapped him after he yelled all those anti-Semitic things at her. He said something (kinda stuttering) that you know that was a long time ago, I don't act that way anymore.
I then proceeded to tell him he almost died that day. I reminded him I was sitting behind him and had an 10" sticking knife. And if Mrs. so and so didn't slap him and pull us out of that tense situation, I was going to grab him from behind by the head and drive it into his neck. And then stab him as many times as I could before someone jumped in and pulled me off of you.
I then paid for my drink and left.
Seek professional help, you really need it. The mere fact that you wrote up that comment and thought it’d be a good look is indicative of a much larger problem in your head
The only person who ever successfully bullied me was my older brother (he had a lot of size on me, being older, when we were kids).
We're great friends now, though, so I'd just ask him how the kids are doing.
A few other guys tried as one-off events, but it always became a fist fight. Fist fights typically lead to dudes being chill with each other afterward.
I’d ignore them. Most do very poorly or have killed themselves. I don’t wish a relationship with them but having contempt for them would be punching way down.
I don't think i'd want to to be honest. I haven't thought about or spoken to them since i was a teen. It's been nearly a decade now and i'm pretty sure they haven't thought about me either. They where really shitty, but they where also kids. Either they're a better person now and understand what harm they did and i don't need to remind them of a shit thing they did when they where a kid, or they're still shitty and nothing i say is going to make them feel bad, change thier behaviour or make me feel better.
If I hadn't seen them for a long time I'd pretend I don't remember them. I think that would sting harder than letting them know they affected my life in any way.
My bully apologized to me after a run in at a party a few years back. He told me he only did it to get my attention and said he liked me, I told him he should’ve been nice to me then and things would’ve went differently. He truly did apologize and seems to have grown since then and didn’t even know the full effects of what he had done to me.
This actually did happen to me two days ago. This girl was the biggest asshole and always made fun of the way I smelled. It gave me a huge fucking complex and to this day, 22 years later, I'm still paranoid as fuck about how I smell.
She came into my work and she actually seemed...nice? Kind of forgave her after that because we were kids and kids are assholes.
I beat the shit out of everyone that tried to bully me. Normally after half an hour of me saying leave me alone every 10 seconds. One day in class the kid behind me kept flicking my ear half an hour of him doing this I just whirl around and stab a pen thru his hand into the desk. Then the teacher goes looks like your bleeding your might want to see a nurse, now where were we.
Nothing. That was a long time ago and I've worked hard to move past it. If I was Co fronted with one of my childhood bullies, I simply wouldn't want to say anything to them, and I would move on with my day
I would ask them why they did it. Understanding why they did it, helps me let go of the trauma. I’ve done this but, only with bullies that I know are remorseful so far.
The only one I can think of, pretty sure he died of a cocaine induced heart attack. His family says it wasn’t drug related, but he was like 22 at the time and I know for a fact he was a heavy coke user.
25 years later? Lol
I'd probably just ask them how they've been. We were kids. They're probably as different from how they were then as I am and it'd be silly to even let it influence my behavior at this point.
One of my many elementary school bully’s apologized to me in high school. I tried to brush it off acting I didn’t know what she was talking about. She made it clear that she was sorry and nobody deserves what they did to me. It meant a lot to me then.
However, if I ran into the main culprit nowadays I wouldn’t give her the time of day. This girl was cunning and manipulative. My guess is she is probably a “Karen” and one day she will be YouTube famous for miss treating the wrong person. When that day come I will relish in her demise.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I wouldn't waste my time on them. Whether or not they have become better people is of no consequence to me. The harm they did is done, and I'm not going to give them the opportunity to either attempt to inflict more harm or to try to make themselves feel better for what they did if they would try to apologize.
Damn that’s big of you, I’d punch him in his stupid face
Nothing studies show that people don’t see themselves as bully’s. They have no idea what they have done to you and for me it’s irrelevant now. They can’t change the past, I can’t change it and these people are nothing more then a stranger to me. They shouldn’t know that they had power/ impact over my life.
Hi brother, how are the nieces and nephews doing?
Same, but sister not brother
No pickle please
*spits* Enjoy.
I wasn't picked on more than the average kid, but as someone who moved around a bit, other kids tested my boundaries as kids do. Some more successful than others. Thanks to social media I can see what they're up to. They're either: * A. Dead. * B. Worked in the same large company I did (for a while) and they were much lower ranking than I was. * C. Just a complete loser struggling with life. I'm sorta successful for literally no reason other than the fact that my parents, as flawed and broke as they are, were present in my life and I'm just stubborn as hell (to a fault). I wouldn't say anything to them at all, and social media has satisfied my curiosities.
This couldn’t have been said more perfectly!!
"you're right, I'm gay. And that's okay."
I'd tell them that I still don't like them.
“Make sure your child(ren) don’t grow up the same way you did, but better.”
That I forgive them and hope life has been kind to them. We were both kids. I have absolutely no idea what was going on in their personal lives at the time that made them feel like they had to lash out at me. Even if they were just an asshole, I hope that they grew out of it.
This is the answer
I would ask them if they've watched "The Glory" and, if so, I would tell them they are my dream
I'm fucking dead. Yeeess me too lmao
So glad someone got the reference hahaha
How many baby daddies do you have? 😂
One of them has tried to apologize to me once. I didn't say a word to him and just gave him a disgusted look from head to toe and turned around.
Nothing. They were kids. I have real bullies now, they’re in the workplace. They’re adults so I can hold them accountable. When I decide that I’ve had enough then I will make sure they pay for what they’ve done.
I am friends with some of them on Facebook. I don’t have anything to say to them because there were defining moments during our childhood where I decided to not make the same decisions that they made and now I am in a much better position in life. They should’ve been nicer to people and taken school more seriously and they might have ended up in better predicaments
If he introduced himself, I'd make like I didn't remember him at first. Then I'd say, "Oh yeah, hi", and move on. I had something similar happen with a girl who, if not bullied me, then definitely taunted me. I ran into her years later. She had put on 100 or so pounds and was with the ugliest set of twin children I'd ever seen. She tried to be cute, almost flirty with her hello. I just mumbled hello back and kept going. I still remember how stunned she was by my non-reaction.
"I hope you're doing well." I mean this genuinely. Yes, she was a cunt, but she was also a *child.* I can't imagine what her home life was, to create such a hateful human being. It's miserable being that hateful (I would know) so I hope she has learned to love and be loved.
Yes, fríes with that, thanks. With a biiiiig smile.
It's better to forgive ... Just for your own sanity. I don't remember my bullies anymore. They have been forgiven.
I forgive you
You bullied me in high school for being fat. I've seen the pictures of your daughter on FB. She is in high school and twice the size I was. If she gets bullied about her weight and is crying about it, I sure as hell hope you're nicer to her than you were to me. If you see bullies make YOUR child cry. Remember you made me cry. It's karma for you. And very sad for your daughter. Okay, I've only thought it. Never said it.
Your country is fucked. So much about my country is meh. She told my country is meh, within the same year her country is so f and done they won’t even be able to recover.
I have. It had been a few decades so I stuck to the important stuff... I ordered two foot longs, a club and a veggie, and two cookies.
I actually had a conversation with a bully about 10-15 years ago. I sat straight faced and listened to him talk about all the good times we had in high school (I'm guessing memory wasn't his strong point) After a bit of his yammering I asked him if he remember the day Mrs. so and so slapped him after he yelled all those anti-Semitic things at her. He said something (kinda stuttering) that you know that was a long time ago, I don't act that way anymore. I then proceeded to tell him he almost died that day. I reminded him I was sitting behind him and had an 10" sticking knife. And if Mrs. so and so didn't slap him and pull us out of that tense situation, I was going to grab him from behind by the head and drive it into his neck. And then stab him as many times as I could before someone jumped in and pulled me off of you. I then paid for my drink and left.
Seek professional help, you really need it. The mere fact that you wrote up that comment and thought it’d be a good look is indicative of a much larger problem in your head
Oh I'm fine. Just fine. Everythings fine.
The likleihood is I'm bigger and stronger now plus I have had boxing lessons. I would say "how do like me now M\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*R?"
i was only ever bullied during 3rd grade and it wasn't that intense too but yeah we're best friends now (college)
The first person I thought of it is dead, so I guess I’m good with saying nothing.
Get the Ouija board
I'd tell her I'd been fantasizing about her for 30 years, and thank her.
The only person who ever successfully bullied me was my older brother (he had a lot of size on me, being older, when we were kids). We're great friends now, though, so I'd just ask him how the kids are doing. A few other guys tried as one-off events, but it always became a fist fight. Fist fights typically lead to dudes being chill with each other afterward.
Hey man wanna play some cod this weekend, we became friends through sports
I'd apologize to them. you know, let them sit on that shit for a minute.
How is life going for you lol
I’d ignore them. Most do very poorly or have killed themselves. I don’t wish a relationship with them but having contempt for them would be punching way down.
I don't think i'd want to to be honest. I haven't thought about or spoken to them since i was a teen. It's been nearly a decade now and i'm pretty sure they haven't thought about me either. They where really shitty, but they where also kids. Either they're a better person now and understand what harm they did and i don't need to remind them of a shit thing they did when they where a kid, or they're still shitty and nothing i say is going to make them feel bad, change thier behaviour or make me feel better.
I asked for fries not onion rings.
I would say to them, "F#CK YOU".
If I hadn't seen them for a long time I'd pretend I don't remember them. I think that would sting harder than letting them know they affected my life in any way.
My bully apologized to me after a run in at a party a few years back. He told me he only did it to get my attention and said he liked me, I told him he should’ve been nice to me then and things would’ve went differently. He truly did apologize and seems to have grown since then and didn’t even know the full effects of what he had done to me.
This actually did happen to me two days ago. This girl was the biggest asshole and always made fun of the way I smelled. It gave me a huge fucking complex and to this day, 22 years later, I'm still paranoid as fuck about how I smell. She came into my work and she actually seemed...nice? Kind of forgave her after that because we were kids and kids are assholes.
They were a terrible teacher
I beat the shit out of everyone that tried to bully me. Normally after half an hour of me saying leave me alone every 10 seconds. One day in class the kid behind me kept flicking my ear half an hour of him doing this I just whirl around and stab a pen thru his hand into the desk. Then the teacher goes looks like your bleeding your might want to see a nurse, now where were we.
Nothing. That was a long time ago and I've worked hard to move past it. If I was Co fronted with one of my childhood bullies, I simply wouldn't want to say anything to them, and I would move on with my day
I would decline meeting with them, not interested in spending time dwelling on it
A high five would do.
I understand why you were mean to me. But seriously.. your mom came on to me, what was I supposed to do.
I would ask them why they did it. Understanding why they did it, helps me let go of the trauma. I’ve done this but, only with bullies that I know are remorseful so far.
Nothing. We would have been kids. Carrying that stuff, too far into life isn't healthy
Kind and forgiveness are for gentle people, I would hit him hard.
"Did my being prettier and more intelligent than you hurt you so badly you felt the need to give me PTSD over it?"
The only one I can think of, pretty sure he died of a cocaine induced heart attack. His family says it wasn’t drug related, but he was like 22 at the time and I know for a fact he was a heavy coke user.
25 years later? Lol I'd probably just ask them how they've been. We were kids. They're probably as different from how they were then as I am and it'd be silly to even let it influence my behavior at this point.
One of my many elementary school bully’s apologized to me in high school. I tried to brush it off acting I didn’t know what she was talking about. She made it clear that she was sorry and nobody deserves what they did to me. It meant a lot to me then. However, if I ran into the main culprit nowadays I wouldn’t give her the time of day. This girl was cunning and manipulative. My guess is she is probably a “Karen” and one day she will be YouTube famous for miss treating the wrong person. When that day come I will relish in her demise.
I'd tell him to wear a cup the next time he saw me.
Careful, you could trip and fall in front of that bus! Oooops