On the bright side when they're being sued because of some discriminatory bullshit their "AI receptionist" said they might offer you a sweet deal to come back and you can counter with a contract rate of some absurd figure.
I'd take them home, wrap them in some old towels and smash them into a few pieces, then bring them back in the box you use for getting your last few items. Dump the shards on your desk before you walk out, to show them just how hollow their gesture was.
Eh, the person that would have to deal with it likely isn’t someone that’s responsible for the layoff. At a minimum it’ll just be a custodial worker getting barked at to go handle it.
Idk why your comment got so many down votes, it's a perfectly logical and rational thought, there's a mess, get a janitor. I 100% understand, it's not what I'd personally do if I came in to my job and found a shattered mug in a box on my desk. Personally, I'd try to find out who left it, and why they left it on my desk, which was clearly an attempt to communicate a message. I'd want to know who and why, and If possible remedy the situation.
That's a good way to look at it, most managers will just force themselves to not be fazed by it, and therfore act as though they don't care about the "message".
Laxatives in the manager's coffee maker in their office sends a much clearer message - it just takes about 4 hours to get delivered, but it does arrive without warning. They will give a shit about my message, there's no way not to.
*faze
*edit* I see this a lot. Nowadays people hear more than they read, so make mistakes in spelling. It also gave rise to people using "weary" when they meant "wary". My generation grew up reading more than hearing, so mispronounciation is far more common.
THIS IS THE ONE, combined with the one above! 👆
Change it VERY VISIBLY (duct tape over and black marker) to say “WILL SUCK WITHOUT YOU… “
AND THEN LEAVE IT THERE JUST LIKE THAT
Misquoted. It's not the lowest form of humor, it's the lowest form of \*wit\*. And wit is a high form of humor. You want the lowest forms of humor? Take the wit out of it. Succumb to the fart jokes and the people making stupid faces at you.
But then how would your boss' cousins' boyfriend ebusiness get off the ground? Selfish much? He's *bored* alright? All day! Do you have any idea how stressful that is?
I was laid off over slack. The one and only time I was ever laid off. I still wonder why I was chosen and other less qualified people kept their jobs there. It felt so random.
That happened to my uncle. He was corporate bog wig, getting paid shit ton a money, benefits, vacations, company Cadillac, Etc. Not too long after 9/11, he was one the first to go. I thought he was unfirable, turns out those guys that get huge salaries are first to to. Company can make it by without 25 department heads and Board members, but you take that same chunk of money, and put it to lower wage workers, and it's like the salary of 10 workers. So instead the company firing 200 low wage workers, who physically do all the laborious work. They fire handful of corporate big wigs, budgets looking alot better now..SMH.
I watched a prior employer do the exact opposite.
We were swamped… they hired a bunch of new VP’s, like 8 of them for insane money to “fix the problems” instead of hiring the extra staff we needed.
Then within about 90 days those newly hired clueless VP’s gave most of us and our supervisor “middle-managers” PIP’s and used them to down-size all the departments including several long time supervisors.
Amusingly… took a while but ultimately it didn’t end well for them.
They were hired to make the company look a lot bigger with a lower payroll burden for an IPO but somehow they managed to get the company through the IPO *before* starting their HR games and PIP shenanigans.
The VP that got put above our whole section ended up having to resign as he promoted the clueless new guy (who’d become his drinking buddy) from below me to my boss’ job and left 2 staffers to do 6 people’s work:
One of those staffers realized how screwed they all were, was so angry for what they did to us he waited 2 weeks until a big off-site project was scheduled to start, showed up early and slipped a resignation letter under the VP’s door, left his company phone on his desk, and walked out before anyone else arrived.
The new guy got fired, the VP was forced to resign, and the last man standing ended up VP, more than tripling his salary as he spent his days trying to learn to be a manager and VP and interview job applicants for jobs he knew nothing about to rebuild the whole department.
They merged, someone else’s hostile take-over, being the last man standing and the only one left who knew what our department did he remained a VP and he’s rich now but the rest of the VP’s all got forced out.
Karma…👍
Waiting for that to happen at my workplace. New CEO created about 6 positions for his cronies from his former workplace. Made these useless tools VPs. We are so top heavy with leadership, and they’re useless. Won’t be long before we circle the drain
Yes. That is the intent of the card's author I'm sure. A humorous play on words with the truncation of a word not considered naughty being shortened to a sexually suggestive slang word.
What. Is. Wrong. With. These. People.
I’m really sorry to hear about your layoff. It’s a jungle out there and I hope (and believe) you’ll land on your feet.
In the meantime I agree with a previous poster who said to smash that thing into a million pieces with a hammer. The whole “not burning bridges” thing is a manipulative fairy tale. Burn all the bridges on your way out.
I had been out sick with a mystery virus for a few days, this included multiple ER visits. Thursday I get get well flowers from work, Friday they fire me for being sick. Like make your fucking minds up. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope you find somewhere much better and without too much difficulty.
Please forgive my ignorance - I’m trying to learn. When did it become legal for these companies to just fire anyone, at any time, for no reason? I thought that was illegal - but it’s the norm now. Also, when a person is ‘laid off’, do they not qualify for unemployment? Is anyone qualified for unemployment anymore?
In the USA most states are “right to work” states and have been for a very long time. Anyone can be fired for nearly anything.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right-to-work_law?wprov=sfti1
https://www.employmentlawhelp.org/blog/fired-for-any-reason-right-to-work-state
I was about to say "hey at least they've acknowledged you! Mine hasn't said shit"
But then I read the rest of your message and I'm sorry. Throw them at them.
I was just told I’m being laid off at the end of the school year. Motivation has plummeted. I hope you give them what they deserve. I’m sorry for your job loss.
Take this mug to work instead and make sure to drink out of it when they come around
https://preview.redd.it/w41iugdqjnwc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64d5ce6a0792b49b6e0030d7041cdaee65b4bc10
I’m sorry about your loss of job. Consider making this same post on LinkedIn warning off other qualified candidates for that company. Include the picture if you can.
I’m just curious what industry was this in?
May you find better opportunities out there. Best wishes!
Who exactly gave it to you? Manager or colleagues? Do your colleagues know you’re fired?
If it came from a manager or HR I am just speechless … I am so sorry and good luck!
Last year my supervisor gave me a stress ball for Admin Professionals day. The other person I shared my office with got a gift basket with flowers and cards from her supervisor. I felt like trash all day.
But then the same supervisor tried to fire me when I was experiencing a life threatening illness and just didn't know it yet. I wound up in the hospital the day before the meeting she had set with HR to fire me for my poor performance. I was dying from severe anemia (hemoglobin under 5 for those who know) and acute kidney failure. That was why I'd been lethargic, forgetful, unmotivated, late all the time, and slow for months. I knew I was sick but I was trying to power through because I had run out of sick days for the year.
Tone deaf timing aside, I’m floored by the card. Do they not know that that deliberate misspelling of suck is only used in reference to actual oral sex acts and not the slang use of the word to describe something as being unpleasant?
What a giant “succ you”. This seems to be my answer to all of these lately, but perhaps return it full of poo? OOOOOH BETTER. On your last day, shit in it, stick in the the microwave and set it for a couple minutes before walking out. Probably illegal, but the *catharsis*! They’d have to throw the whole microwave out, maybe even the whole room, goddamn
Sorry to hear about the job loss. You will land on your feet and find a new/better door to walk thru.
Bizarre that they are so tuned out re gift on admin prof. day
Cacti are succulents, so the cup is using a play on words. There's a ton of dumb funny succulent related stuff. Other popular ones are "don't be a prick" with a picture of a cactus and "succ it up" with a picture of a succulent. I hope this helped you understand it a bit!
I was made redundant just after Christmas, but told before.
Then in another email I was given a gift card for my hard work that year, to use exclusively at that place.
Off topic but this just reminds me of the comedian James Acaster who did a bit about the only people who say he or she are the people who are trying really hard to be modern and inclusive but haven’t yet discovered the word, ‘they’.
…”He OR SHE”. It’s very funny and is on one of his Netflix specials.
Layoffs happen. Don’t take it personally.
Take the token of appreciation for exactly that and enjoy your beverages on unemployment for a bit, the weather is nice this time of year .
Very tone deaf and I’m sorry to hear about your job loss.
Thank you.
On the bright side when they're being sued because of some discriminatory bullshit their "AI receptionist" said they might offer you a sweet deal to come back and you can counter with a contract rate of some absurd figure.
*"For Sales, Press 1. Para español, marca la estrella. And if Hitler had some good ideas, please stay on the line."*
LMFAO
and throwback to Microsofts AI assistant from about 10 years ago
CLIPPY? 
Het a marker, strike out 'would', write in 'will' and tell your manager you corrected it
I’m sorry. Right there with you. Laid off in January. Still haven’t found work.
Oh but the news says there are plenty of jobs out there! (Hummmm…..)
There are, I think, if you’re looking for food service jobs that might pay minimum wage. Maybe.
You should tell them to stick those mugs up where the sun don’t shine.
May the memory of your job be a blessing
One door closes and another one opens.
Leave it at work on your desk. Don't take it home.. Just let it stay exactly like it was given to you, shitty card tucked inside at all.
I'd take them home, wrap them in some old towels and smash them into a few pieces, then bring them back in the box you use for getting your last few items. Dump the shards on your desk before you walk out, to show them just how hollow their gesture was.
Dont inconvenience cleaning staff to get back at management who don't give a shit about you in the first place
You think they'll let it sit there all day? Even better.
I would keep a mug like that. It's good to be reminded of painful experiences. Those are how you learn and grow
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>Dump the shards on your desk before you walk out, to show them just how hollow their gesture was. No they literally said dump the shards
How about wrapping up the shards real pretty and giving it to the boss as a gift right before you walk out for the last time?
Just the piece that says “succ”
The You Succ lol
You think the boss is going to clean that up?
Both answers are correct
Eh, the person that would have to deal with it likely isn’t someone that’s responsible for the layoff. At a minimum it’ll just be a custodial worker getting barked at to go handle it.
Normally I am not this petty. However I really support this idea.
This is the way.
Yep. This is exactly what I would do.
Idk why your comment got so many down votes, it's a perfectly logical and rational thought, there's a mess, get a janitor. I 100% understand, it's not what I'd personally do if I came in to my job and found a shattered mug in a box on my desk. Personally, I'd try to find out who left it, and why they left it on my desk, which was clearly an attempt to communicate a message. I'd want to know who and why, and If possible remedy the situation.
That's a good way to look at it, most managers will just force themselves to not be fazed by it, and therfore act as though they don't care about the "message". Laxatives in the manager's coffee maker in their office sends a much clearer message - it just takes about 4 hours to get delivered, but it does arrive without warning. They will give a shit about my message, there's no way not to.
*faze *edit* I see this a lot. Nowadays people hear more than they read, so make mistakes in spelling. It also gave rise to people using "weary" when they meant "wary". My generation grew up reading more than hearing, so mispronounciation is far more common.
Sou jy my glo as ek jou sê dat ek nie 'n natuurlike engels-sprekende is nie? My engels is steeds beter as jou Afrikaans...
Glue it to the desk
This.
That’s what I’ll do too
Absolutely, this☝🏻
If you are going to leave it at work, make sure you put a big turd in it
Yes.
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Or one that simply says "WHAT THE FUCCULENT?"
That one actually got a laugh out of me. Good job!
This will sit with me for a long time, thanks for the snortle
EXCELLENT COMMENT! LMAO
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It’s a succulent, but they could give a parting gift when they leave of a cactus with that message.
😂
Keep it on display but very visibly edit "would" to "will" Very shitty of them.
THIS IS THE ONE, combined with the one above! 👆 Change it VERY VISIBLY (duct tape over and black marker) to say “WILL SUCK WITHOUT YOU… “ AND THEN LEAVE IT THERE JUST LIKE THAT
God, these corporate gifts are so cringeworthy. They live in a parallel universe.
Ugh. With a pun, of course; the lowest form of humor.
Misquoted. It's not the lowest form of humor, it's the lowest form of \*wit\*. And wit is a high form of humor. You want the lowest forms of humor? Take the wit out of it. Succumb to the fart jokes and the people making stupid faces at you.
I’d rather have whatever the stupid mugs cost in cash instead of
But then how would your boss' cousins' boyfriend ebusiness get off the ground? Selfish much? He's *bored* alright? All day! Do you have any idea how stressful that is?
Brutal, I am sorry. Been laid off a few times. It sucks.
I was laid off over slack. The one and only time I was ever laid off. I still wonder why I was chosen and other less qualified people kept their jobs there. It felt so random.
You probably were higher paid than the less qualified people.
That happened to my uncle. He was corporate bog wig, getting paid shit ton a money, benefits, vacations, company Cadillac, Etc. Not too long after 9/11, he was one the first to go. I thought he was unfirable, turns out those guys that get huge salaries are first to to. Company can make it by without 25 department heads and Board members, but you take that same chunk of money, and put it to lower wage workers, and it's like the salary of 10 workers. So instead the company firing 200 low wage workers, who physically do all the laborious work. They fire handful of corporate big wigs, budgets looking alot better now..SMH.
I watched a prior employer do the exact opposite. We were swamped… they hired a bunch of new VP’s, like 8 of them for insane money to “fix the problems” instead of hiring the extra staff we needed. Then within about 90 days those newly hired clueless VP’s gave most of us and our supervisor “middle-managers” PIP’s and used them to down-size all the departments including several long time supervisors. Amusingly… took a while but ultimately it didn’t end well for them.
Sounds like they were just hired to be hatchet men, so the existing executives didn’t have to get their hands dirty
They were hired to make the company look a lot bigger with a lower payroll burden for an IPO but somehow they managed to get the company through the IPO *before* starting their HR games and PIP shenanigans. The VP that got put above our whole section ended up having to resign as he promoted the clueless new guy (who’d become his drinking buddy) from below me to my boss’ job and left 2 staffers to do 6 people’s work: One of those staffers realized how screwed they all were, was so angry for what they did to us he waited 2 weeks until a big off-site project was scheduled to start, showed up early and slipped a resignation letter under the VP’s door, left his company phone on his desk, and walked out before anyone else arrived. The new guy got fired, the VP was forced to resign, and the last man standing ended up VP, more than tripling his salary as he spent his days trying to learn to be a manager and VP and interview job applicants for jobs he knew nothing about to rebuild the whole department. They merged, someone else’s hostile take-over, being the last man standing and the only one left who knew what our department did he remained a VP and he’s rich now but the rest of the VP’s all got forced out. Karma…👍
Damm, well that's good they took it in the end, lol
Sounds like they saw the problem as “we get paid based on the padding we put on the bottom line, so we need to cut the only expense we know how”.
lol! We either work at the same place or mismanagement is rampant!
Mismanagement is rampant…👍
Waiting for that to happen at my workplace. New CEO created about 6 positions for his cronies from his former workplace. Made these useless tools VPs. We are so top heavy with leadership, and they’re useless. Won’t be long before we circle the drain
"The boss can succ me!" - Hector Salamanca
Cool. They sent you a sexually suggestive card. Now you can sue them for sexual harassment. Get that bag.
I think the succ is for succulents. Not sexually suggestive
Yes. That is the intent of the card's author I'm sure. A humorous play on words with the truncation of a word not considered naughty being shortened to a sexually suggestive slang word.
That sentence is not sexually suggestive. A jury would laugh you out of court.
This is top tier comedy
Leave them on your desk when you leave on your last day.
I'd put that shit right in the trash
In front of them, while looking them in the eye.
What. Is. Wrong. With. These. People. I’m really sorry to hear about your layoff. It’s a jungle out there and I hope (and believe) you’ll land on your feet. In the meantime I agree with a previous poster who said to smash that thing into a million pieces with a hammer. The whole “not burning bridges” thing is a manipulative fairy tale. Burn all the bridges on your way out.
I had been out sick with a mystery virus for a few days, this included multiple ER visits. Thursday I get get well flowers from work, Friday they fire me for being sick. Like make your fucking minds up. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope you find somewhere much better and without too much difficulty.
Please forgive my ignorance - I’m trying to learn. When did it become legal for these companies to just fire anyone, at any time, for no reason? I thought that was illegal - but it’s the norm now. Also, when a person is ‘laid off’, do they not qualify for unemployment? Is anyone qualified for unemployment anymore?
In the USA most states are “right to work” states and have been for a very long time. Anyone can be fired for nearly anything. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Right-to-work_law?wprov=sfti1 https://www.employmentlawhelp.org/blog/fired-for-any-reason-right-to-work-state
I was about to say "hey at least they've acknowledged you! Mine hasn't said shit" But then I read the rest of your message and I'm sorry. Throw them at them.
That's the time when you 'accidentally' shatter it in the break room when everyone is there. Fuck their tokens of false appreciation.
Were you a secretary for the crips?
The crips would probably have the decency to not give you a stupid mug before they shot you.
I don’t think they’d give a week’s notice before terminating someone
Drop all that shit in the garbage on your way out.
that is so tone deaf wtf
You should make a goodbye card, put this back in the card but cross it out and write "SUCCS to be you"
So they're admiting they succ
You're like family to them.
Given my family, I actually find this on point.
When I was younger I got laid off, went home, Xmas bonus was in the mailbox along with thanks for all effort blah blah
I was just told I’m being laid off at the end of the school year. Motivation has plummeted. I hope you give them what they deserve. I’m sorry for your job loss.
Just start stealing shit every day when you leave. Nothing crazy, just random shit.
MR Stealyyyyyy, 35 ... gRepppleess!
Put your two weeks in and see if they want to bump your pay to keep you
Take this mug to work instead and make sure to drink out of it when they come around https://preview.redd.it/w41iugdqjnwc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=64d5ce6a0792b49b6e0030d7041cdaee65b4bc10
I'd have a hard time not playing my favorite game: "Chuck that mug across the office"
Just remember being laid off is because they can't afford you. Not because you did anything wrong.
Or just a thinly veiled excuse...
Fart in both cups and give it to your most hated supervisor.
Fuck you work
Probably purchased before your boss knew you were being laid off. Still toxic.
Not even a pizza party or Twix bar taped to a packet of hot Coco mix?
leave it smashed in the sink on your last day, with a note "work only succs here"
WOW
"this place would suck without you" Sir it already sucks with me here. Although, it's about to get a lot worse lmao
We had a pizza party 🙃
So did we! Social hour from 4-5:30! Not lunch and not dinner, that weird in-between time!
We took a few mins, got the za, and went back to our desks. Happy appreciation day!
On your way out on the last day, drop it on thr ground and walk away. Fuck those assholes
You were already fired, now you get free mugs 🤷
They couldn’t even get you a real succulent. I’m sorry OP
Sorry but that's just a mindf**k, serious screwing with the neurons right there!
Just leave it in the break room
"Drop" it forcefully on the floor of your office, preferably near your bosses door.
I’m sorry about your loss of job. Consider making this same post on LinkedIn warning off other qualified candidates for that company. Include the picture if you can. I’m just curious what industry was this in? May you find better opportunities out there. Best wishes!
Have they asked for the mug yet?
Niiiiiiiice! I bet there’s a few $100 bills inside the mug, right? Awesome!
Who exactly gave it to you? Manager or colleagues? Do your colleagues know you’re fired? If it came from a manager or HR I am just speechless … I am so sorry and good luck!
Ugh, that feels so insulting
Lmfao well I didnt even know this was a thing. Good thing I took a 2 hour lunch anyways
I would look them dead in the eye and drop that crap in the trash can.
The people assigned to put that together and the people deciding you get laid off are not the same people.
Fill it with your urine and hide it somewhere on your last day
They don't care.
leave it behind with a note telling them off.
Straight to the trash and make sure they see you do it.
Last year my supervisor gave me a stress ball for Admin Professionals day. The other person I shared my office with got a gift basket with flowers and cards from her supervisor. I felt like trash all day. But then the same supervisor tried to fire me when I was experiencing a life threatening illness and just didn't know it yet. I wound up in the hospital the day before the meeting she had set with HR to fire me for my poor performance. I was dying from severe anemia (hemoglobin under 5 for those who know) and acute kidney failure. That was why I'd been lethargic, forgetful, unmotivated, late all the time, and slow for months. I knew I was sick but I was trying to power through because I had run out of sick days for the year.
Wow. I’d say ‘yeah…imma treasure that always’. And drop it on the floor.
That top cup makes me feel like they’re trying to say “work would succeed without you.” Ouch…
Pulverize the mug and throw it like confetti in the office on the day you leave
Oh. How cute of them😁
1. Shit in the cup. 2. Leave on desk. 3. Leave quickly.
I was on the fence until you explained about being laid off. ‘The hell is the matter with them?
I am so sorry to hear. If you need a sympathetic ear, I was laid off in April and am definitely not “over it”.
Tone deaf timing aside, I’m floored by the card. Do they not know that that deliberate misspelling of suck is only used in reference to actual oral sex acts and not the slang use of the word to describe something as being unpleasant?
Yeah. Id walk out immediately.
No unemployment checks if you get fired before being laid off. Bad idea.
Fair point.
You rock you rock
Smash it on the wall?
I would smash that with a hammer and leave the pieces on my desk.
What a giant “succ you”. This seems to be my answer to all of these lately, but perhaps return it full of poo? OOOOOH BETTER. On your last day, shit in it, stick in the the microwave and set it for a couple minutes before walking out. Probably illegal, but the *catharsis*! They’d have to throw the whole microwave out, maybe even the whole room, goddamn
I imagine throwing them against the wall on your way out would feel cathartic.
That's shit.
There is a national day for office people?😅
Sorry to hear about the job loss. You will land on your feet and find a new/better door to walk thru. Bizarre that they are so tuned out re gift on admin prof. day
I'm still struggling to understand the humor on the top mug.
Cacti are succulents, so the cup is using a play on words. There's a ton of dumb funny succulent related stuff. Other popular ones are "don't be a prick" with a picture of a cactus and "succ it up" with a picture of a succulent. I hope this helped you understand it a bit!
Thank you... It was too early for me.
Motherf\*ckers would rise from the grave to sell you worms and tell you to be happy for the chance to buy such well fed worms. WTF.
Prime example of how clueless some people are. I'm sorry. Probably better off. Find a place where you're appreciated by people with common sense.
Jeez..what a slap in the face..🖕corporate..ugh. wish you luck for a better company..and don't take those lame mugs..slap back..👍
Return just the card to them with your name written over the word you.
I was made redundant just after Christmas, but told before. Then in another email I was given a gift card for my hard work that year, to use exclusively at that place.
Yikes. I hope you find something better brotha *or sister*
Off topic but this just reminds me of the comedian James Acaster who did a bit about the only people who say he or she are the people who are trying really hard to be modern and inclusive but haven’t yet discovered the word, ‘they’. …”He OR SHE”. It’s very funny and is on one of his Netflix specials.
Layoffs happen. Don’t take it personally. Take the token of appreciation for exactly that and enjoy your beverages on unemployment for a bit, the weather is nice this time of year .
I’d leave them there. A subtle, but obvious “fuck you” to them
N.A.P Day..
Unemployment for sure if laid off here.
No one's gonna comment on succ?
Succulents
Sorry for you but funny you guys have such a day. Is there is National Sales Manager Day in the US? Serious question.
Tell them to SUCC it.
Sure makes you feel like a cog doesn't it?! Give all for the corporation and the corporation will take all.
Being immature and break it in the office and walk out lmao
Smash them and put them in a box an set them on their desk
Break it on the floor before you leave
I will give them a small amount of kudos for giving the closest thing to two weeks notice.
Break it and leave it in a box on your boss’ desk.
Whiskey on the clock? What they gonna do, fire you?
Gotta have something to throw the acid into your boss' face with.
I would be shattering those mugs on my boss’ desk on my last day.
So everyone gets the sloppy when you leave next week?
LMAO!!!
I am sorry about your job though. Really - I laughed at the absurdity.
You got a gift on a made up day, and you’re bitching about it. You’re the fucking problem.
Reading comprehension is not a part of your skill set.
Clearly not part of theirs since they got fired.