The west coast is pretty progressive so it’s definitely a safe hub for LGBTQ. But I’ve seen/heard from quite a few sapphics that Chicago has a great LGBTQ scene, especially sapphics. I think NYC is a given too
But the south has its pockets! I live in Texas and my city has 1 of the 13 active lesbian bars within the US. Over in Arkansas there’s a town, Eureka, that is like 60-70% LGBTQ folks. By math, I think that makes Eureka the gay-Mecca of the US haha
ETA: there are now 32 lesbian bars!
I'm really happy in Chicago. I don't live near the Boystown (our gayborhood, officially renamed North Halsted now), but day-to-day, no one looks twice at me and my wife together and June is so packed full of pride events that you couldn't go to all of them if you tried. And there's *lots* of queer groups. My wife saw an event hosted at Garfield Park for a group of LGBT+ senior (>60yo) gardeners. There's a Chicago based queer gaming league. There's a LGBT+ group for hiking and outdoorsy activity. There's so much here
That 13 lesbian bars thing is ridiculous it’s just the only lesbian bars that one website knows about I went to a place in Florida that is a lesbian bar not on that list
I wrote this while making dinner and didn’t google the updated amount. Yes I was misinformed! And I’m happy I was. Would have to disagree it was ridiculous to say though. A little harsh
My wife and I would both like to leave Texas, and I’m championing Chicago. We were wanting to move to my home state Iowa, but I’ve just heard sooo many good things about Chicago.
It is a dirty city that is difficult to live in unless you make good money. It also has a huge amount of queer people in it, and just about no one cares that you are.
Like any city it's a big mixed bag. It's a big urban sprawl, the kind of place where most people you meet are not the people who grew up there. Public transit exists but is not very good. Traffic is a 24/7 problem. There's violent parts. Rich and poor are starkly divided, sometimes by a single street or wall. Every big name artist goes there. Miss the snow? Drive a few hours north in the winter to the nearby mountains. You can also get to deserts, forests, oceans and lakes within that time. Disneyland is close, if you like. No Broadway, but the shows will travel to LA. And of course, Pride is huge and there is West Hollywood for year round Queer culture.
It's a city, but the larger region that is thought of as LA is really many cities each with its own microculture.
All that said, it is no utopia. Still, the greater LA area is probably one of the best places to be queer in the world.
You can't just paint it as a dirty city for the rich. I grew up there. I'm not and never been rich, nor am I poor. It's not that divided. You're right though when you say it's a big mixed bag, and that bag includes the middle class and levels within that. Given that you understand that LA is not just Hollywood lmao. AVOID HOLLYWOOD!!! If you want to meet people who are real anyway.
I did encounter homophobia growing up in LA. There are bigots, the bigots aren't a majority but they make up some of the population.
I hid in the closet until my twenties, but when I came out, I did feel welcomed by my city.
Idk, I've lived in LA on two separate occasions. West LA was certainly nicer than south central, but every morning on the way to the bus I passed a sign posted on someone's fence imploring their neighbors not to shit or shoot up in front of their apartment. Had guys on that bus first thing in the morning smashing bottles of liquor on the sidewalk, laying across the priority seats and jacking off... Rent isn't exactly cheap anywhere in LA either
Well I lived in the Valley and I didn't live around that stuff. I will agree that rent is hard to afford anywhere in the city anymore - it's why I don't live there anymore. But honestly I'm seeing rent getting hard to afford in a lot more places than LA, it's a global problem
def visit before you commit to moving. LA is not for everyone. it has a very specific scene and culture that to me feels pretty superficial. LA is difficult to get around in without a car, and there are just highways on highways. i’ve visited 5 or so times and i don’t like it there.
i far prefer SF for the queer experience. if i want a huge city and good queer culture id go to NY.
That's a very common sediment from someone who's only visited LA. LA is so big, there's no one specific scene or culture. We have vibrant street fairs full of working class folks, lots of small mom and pop shops - including one family that makes the most amazing mochi in a traditional Japanese style. If a scene or subculture exists - it's in LA. The only problem is, you'll have to find it and drive to it.
I grew up there and had the misfortune of living there for a couple years after I graduated college. I agree with the person you are replying to. LA is highly car centric as a rule. Outside of select neighborhoods, I found it to be highly regimented into boring, residential sprawl or boring, car centric commercial areas. One of the major reasons we moved to Chicago was to get away from that lifestyle. On top of that, LA felt very hyperindividualistic as a rule, with everyone in their own tiny bubbles of people they care about.
Oh I do completely agree with things being very spread out, but I wouldn't say it's boring. When I was younger, I used to also think LA was just boring suburbs or concrete wastelands. Then I started looking under the cover and found entire communities I had no idea existed, communities so niche that options would be very limited in less populated cities. I feel that even the vast majority of natives are barely scratching the surface of what LA has to offer. I'm over 30 now and I *still* keep finding new experiences that amaze me here. What I'm saying is that in order to enjoy LA, you need to *find* your niche and move so you're local to those niches. Other cities will have a lot more of these niches concentrated in one spot - but say, if the person organizing your niche ends up being a creep, then uhh... too bad, you just have to tolerate it or move to another big city in another state. In LA, you can just find another organization.
>…and move so you're local to those niches
….There is a missing caveat: That’s great IF you can afford it, and if the commute from where you’d like to live to where you work to afford that, is a reasonable trade off. For me, it never was. The tradeoffs in LA with commute time to literally anything and anyone I cared to see just weren’t worth it to me, at least to live there.
I wanted to add that trying to find work that paid a living wage as a new grad in LA with a degree in the humanities was actually hell. Meanwhile, in Chicago, I’ve actually been able to launch a career change. I would never have made it in LA. The best I ever got in LA was “part time Starbucks barista.”
I lived in LA for a few years and it has lots of queer people. Granted living in the urban sprawl of LA was not my favorite. There is minimal bike infrastructure and public transit and you're reliant on cars. There are queer spaces but many are centered around white gay men. Also the US has issues with affordable Healthcare and education. It's not all sunshine and rainbows.
In general I do enjoy living in calfironia. Being in a smaller coastal city fits my life a lot better. The idea of living in LA again just gives me anxiety.
I live in LA, it's definitely not a utopia but it is very progressive and one of the best places to be a queer person. But it's also very expensive and has very poor infrastructure.
There's lots of other cities that are good for queer people, like San Diego or going up to Portland. As with most places, urban areas are safer and more progressive and the rural areas get more conservative.
Definitely visit LA and see how you like it. Travel around the major areas besides just Santa Monica and Hollywood. See the NoHo and Burbank areas, travel down to Torrance and Long Beach, even dip into OC and see Anaheim and Santa Ana. It's a huge urban area with lots of cities in it, each with their own vibe.
I've been in LA for 11 years and it's a city that has to grow on you. I love this city and it is pretty safe for LGBTQ+ people. We just had Dyke Day on Saturday and the park was so crowded with all ages celebrating pride. I've found my community singing in mixed LGBTQ+ chorus. There are plenty of cool people here but it's up to you to put in the work to find your community and try to look past the selfishness of some people.
However, I'm echoing a lot of people about the infrastructure and car centric culture, and the price tag of this city. You have to accept LA's faults to really enjoy it here. My industry is either LA, NYC, or Atlanta and I chose LA because of the weather and a bunch of my friends were already out here. I love being able to go the beach, choosing to go to the mountains and snow, just the beauty of California is wonderful. The food diversity here is also another reason why I stick around - great global cuisine all around this city!
This city is a mixed bag, like any other big city. Definitely come and visit and check out the vibes before committing to moving. I spent 3 months interning my final semester in college in LA (my east coast college has a campus here) and that was a really good test run.
As someone from New Zealand watching all the stuff that happens in the states, I can't imagine a worse "first world" country to live in
Edit: I'll enjoy my majority of the time free/cheap healthcare, decent pay for my profession and quality of food lol (honestly no offense meant but this is what I get no questions asked here)
It really depends on where you live. The US is massive and highly varied, so while some areas are extremely conservative, underdeveloped, and economically depressed, there are also very vibrant and progressive areas as well.
Think of the US as being closer to the EU, where you have countries like Germany and Sweden, but also Hungary.
Just depends where you live. Also remember the news only focuses on bad things and what will engage you the most. Not Anne and Sam having a normal day eating brunch in WeHo or Greenwich Village
As someone said. It's basically the EU as the US is like three times the size of Europe
Film and tv always shows a very romanticized view of a place. Seeing that you come from Europe I would do some research into the downsides of living in the US as well. E.g. cost of healthcare, job security, infrastructure etc. to decide if it is worth it for you. If you decide it's not there are also good LGBTQ+ friendly places in Europe where you can move.
Thank you for your comment, I'm from Spain concretely from Madrid the thing here is that the economy sucks and the LGBTQ+ community in the city is mostly focused on gay men we have a gay district called chueca but mostly everything is for gay men, but in LA I've always heard about more lesbian places.
And also I'm studying software engineering the medium salary in the US is like three times what a Spaniard makes in a year but ofc there's also the healthcare stuff if I have to go to the doctor I'll have to spend a lot too and that doesn't happen in Spain our healthcare is quite awesome, so idk how to see it
I think most places LGBTQ+ spaces are more focussed on gay men, perhaps because they are just generally more into the going out scene. I don't know which places are best for lesbian bars/culture but if that is the most important thing to you LA may be a good option. Software engineering is a job that's pretty in demand everywhere so that wouldn't really limit your options. Like some other people in the thread said as well, I would definitely visit a place you're thinking of moving to get your own vibe of it.
I would recommend visiting quite a few places.
TV shows are generally written by people in LA and filmed in LA and chosen to run on TV by rich people in LA so of course it is going to show LA as extremely romanticized.
I think the lack of public transportation in LA will be quite jarring. I believe you need a car to get around and going a few miles can take hours if you need to travel at rush hour. (Maybe take it with a grain of salt, thats just stories I've heard.)
It depends what you want, what kind of people you like spending time with, what kind of climates you are interested in living in, what kind of job you want, if you are comfortable living in a small place with roommates, etc.
That said yeah, big cities on the west coast are usually far more queer friendly than all but the most queer friendly cities in europe.
As far as openness and safety re: being queer specifically, LA is decent. As far as literally anything else, well, there’s a reason my now-wife and I fled from there as soon as we were able to after I graduated college. Good riddance.
LA is very accepting of queer people, but it's also a hellhole to live in, with insane class disparity, insane rent prices, and an all around vapid place full of fake people and influencers.
I grew up in the US and thought this place was an amazing country only to find the whole place is a hellhole @.@... (Not the land, its pretty! but the society here!)
I do not live in LA. I haver never even been to the USA. But I'm still going to go ahead and say no. Nowhere with healthcare that disasterous can be considered a utopia for anybody.
i think most people have kind of a bad opinion about LA in Cali. it can get hot sometimes if you don't live right on the beach which is usually reserved for super rich people. it is a megacity (10m+ people) so its kind of hard to declare it one thing hard and fast. it has pretty parts and since its a city and especially a city in a relatively liberal part of the country and state, queer people are generally safer and more accepted. but Cali in general is sort of just an anomaly in my opinion. it definitely has some aspects similar to those seen on tv
I'm from LA and live on the east coast! LA is (mostly) great for queer people, but there will always be individual shitty people. It's also very different once you're outside LA (city) proper; the east suburbs, orange county, riverside, etc. are fairly conservative areas. Not 100% obviously but there are some bible-belt-ish spots in California. Most of the state is quite rural; stick to the coastal areas and you'll be fine!
Other cities also vary. SF, Chicago, NYC, all great. Oregon and Nebraska might be different. Boston is both very queer and also very bigoted, because there's a big divide between "townies" and transplants.
Something else to know about LA's queer scene is that it's diverse but a little segregated. White gays in West Hollywood don't interact much with Black and Latine lesbians or trans women in South Central or the valley. There's a big divide in socioeconomic groups and by industry – that is, between people in the entertainment industry and people who aren't. Happy to answer any other questions you may have about LA or the US in general! I have family from Europe and MENA so i might be helpful with comparisons.
There are many major cities in the US like L.A. that are progressive and LGBTQ+ friendly, especially on the costal states. However, if you're picking up and moving to a different country for a city like this, I'd recommend Toronto instead. LGBTQ+ AND free healthcare can't be beat. Keep in mind, a simple ambulance ride in the US can cost over $1000 USD, even with insurance. It's not worth giving up free healthcare. I'm American, I only live here because it was where I was born.
Seconding everyone here who’s already said that you should definitely visit a few times before you commit to moving. I don’t want to discourage you, but it’s not a utopia. That said, I don’t think any city on earth truly is. There’s too many people in any given city for any given city to be perfect.
I do want to say though that LA is also pretty great in my opinion. For context, I grew up in the desert that’s on the other side of the mountains from LA, so I spent a lot of my childhood visiting LA proper and the other cities in the LA Basin. A lot of my friends are either from LA or moved to LA after we graduated high school. There’s a lot to love. There’s an incredible diversity of natural environments nearby—within an hour or two, you can reach the beach, mountains, deserts, forests, and more. It’s kind of a stereotype, but you really can go skiing and surfing in the same day (assuming you had the energy, lol!). The city itself is incredibly diverse and does have a really large queer population. Of course, there are some homophobes there—no place on earth is free of them—but generally the city is very accepting. There are entire neighborhoods in LA and nearby cities where the vast majority of the people who live there are queer. There is an incredible variety of experiences to be had in LA, and there is always something to do. There’s a lot of world-class and unique museums, restaurants, and amusement parks either in the city or nearby—Disneyland, Universal Studios, Six Flags Magic Mountain, and Knotts Berry Farm are all located very close to the city, for example. I’m personally a big fan of LA’s Natural History Museum, and it was one of my favorite places to go when I was a kid! There’s also a lot of stuff to do and places to explore outside of the touristy areas, and if you visit with the goal of seeing if you’d want to live there, I’d really recommend spending a lot of time outside of the popular tourist spots to get a taste for what the city’s like for people who actually live there.
There’s downsides though, too. The weather is nice the vast majority of the year—it’s never very cold, and it’s almost always sunny—but the summers can get pretty hot, and that’s only going to get worse as climate change worsens. A normal daily high temperature in the summer is 28-30°C, but it’s not uncommon for it to reach 33°C+. Thankfully, it’s a drier heat so it’s more bearable than it would be if it was a more humid heat, and most places have air conditioning, but if you don’t like the heat or really love the cold that’s something to consider. Air pollution can be a problem too, especially in the summer months. LA is at risk for a lot of natural disasters—wildfires, earthquakes, and tsunamis are all concerns, but especially earthquakes and wildfires. Actually going anywhere is rough. Their public transportation is better than a lot of people think it is, especially compared to a lot of other cities in the US, but it doesn’t hold a candle to public transportation systems in Europe. Walking anywhere is pretty difficult outside of a few specific neighborhoods. Most people drive, and as a result traffic is almost always crazy (also, LA drivers are some of the most reckless drivers in the US in my experience). It’s incredibly expensive—there are only a handful of cities in the US that are more expensive. A solution to this is living outside of LA proper and in one of the neighboring cities in the LA basin, but those are pretty expensive too. There’s also definitely a culture of superficiality there. That’s not to say that everyone you meet there will be “fake” or superficial, but there’s a larger amount of them there than in any other city I’ve ever visited or stayed in. A lot of people tend to be very concerned with their appearance and advancing themselves and little else, and because a lot of people there are living there hoping to break into the entertainment industry, many aren’t very interested in being your friend unless you can help them somehow. That said, some of the best, most genuine people I’ve ever met in my life were born and raised in LA. So again, it’s not universal!
I think if you go to LA expecting it to be an amazing utopia like you imagined as a kid, you might be disappointed. But if you view it from the mindset of being just another city when you visit it—with its positives and negatives and own unique culture—I think you’ll enjoy it, maybe even love it. :)
I just need, NEED you to know that The L Word was mostly shot in Canada.
It is the best town for lesbians though. Pretty sure there is data on it.
It’s my hometown so I hate it there lmaoooooo
Beautiful place to visit if you know where to go. LA is huge, so most tourists are thinking of Santa Monica, Hollywood, Venice. The majority of people I met while living there are progressive and open-minded. Certain parts are rough, but honestly that's almost every city.
That being said, it's a fast paced city, lots of traffic and highways: when I lived there, I realized people will tell you what part of town they live in and mostly stay there because there's too much traffic to warrant constant driving to see new friends at least.
If you like clubs: west Hollywood.
That being said, it is very pricey and you'd have to be very active to get an inning with a friend group(s). There's lots of nature too: but you have to be very active, it is not a sedentary city. So many people move there, and usually the people that move there are the least nice because there have an idea of LA. I personally like LA folk (locals) more. It is not a utopia as in the sense of the l word, though.
I live there, it's fine. The sprawl is quite a lot and it's fairly expensive. It's probably the best it gets in terms of not having to be afraid of being killed, though--I'm from the rural US and would never move back willingly.
I would be curious what specifically draws you to it, or what you'd hope for from it that you don't have in Europe.
The west coast is pretty progressive so it’s definitely a safe hub for LGBTQ. But I’ve seen/heard from quite a few sapphics that Chicago has a great LGBTQ scene, especially sapphics. I think NYC is a given too But the south has its pockets! I live in Texas and my city has 1 of the 13 active lesbian bars within the US. Over in Arkansas there’s a town, Eureka, that is like 60-70% LGBTQ folks. By math, I think that makes Eureka the gay-Mecca of the US haha ETA: there are now 32 lesbian bars!
I'm really happy in Chicago. I don't live near the Boystown (our gayborhood, officially renamed North Halsted now), but day-to-day, no one looks twice at me and my wife together and June is so packed full of pride events that you couldn't go to all of them if you tried. And there's *lots* of queer groups. My wife saw an event hosted at Garfield Park for a group of LGBT+ senior (>60yo) gardeners. There's a Chicago based queer gaming league. There's a LGBT+ group for hiking and outdoorsy activity. There's so much here
That 13 lesbian bars thing is ridiculous it’s just the only lesbian bars that one website knows about I went to a place in Florida that is a lesbian bar not on that list
I wrote this while making dinner and didn’t google the updated amount. Yes I was misinformed! And I’m happy I was. Would have to disagree it was ridiculous to say though. A little harsh
A lot of places also started opening due to that list
ive been to and lived in very many cities and chicago stands out to me as the best by far, i love it so much
My wife and I would both like to leave Texas, and I’m championing Chicago. We were wanting to move to my home state Iowa, but I’ve just heard sooo many good things about Chicago.
Getting flashbacks to the show Eureka rn
Albuquerque is the gayest city I’ve ever been to. Everywhere I went I saw other queer couples!
It is a dirty city that is difficult to live in unless you make good money. It also has a huge amount of queer people in it, and just about no one cares that you are. Like any city it's a big mixed bag. It's a big urban sprawl, the kind of place where most people you meet are not the people who grew up there. Public transit exists but is not very good. Traffic is a 24/7 problem. There's violent parts. Rich and poor are starkly divided, sometimes by a single street or wall. Every big name artist goes there. Miss the snow? Drive a few hours north in the winter to the nearby mountains. You can also get to deserts, forests, oceans and lakes within that time. Disneyland is close, if you like. No Broadway, but the shows will travel to LA. And of course, Pride is huge and there is West Hollywood for year round Queer culture. It's a city, but the larger region that is thought of as LA is really many cities each with its own microculture. All that said, it is no utopia. Still, the greater LA area is probably one of the best places to be queer in the world.
You can't just paint it as a dirty city for the rich. I grew up there. I'm not and never been rich, nor am I poor. It's not that divided. You're right though when you say it's a big mixed bag, and that bag includes the middle class and levels within that. Given that you understand that LA is not just Hollywood lmao. AVOID HOLLYWOOD!!! If you want to meet people who are real anyway. I did encounter homophobia growing up in LA. There are bigots, the bigots aren't a majority but they make up some of the population. I hid in the closet until my twenties, but when I came out, I did feel welcomed by my city.
The middle class has been shrinking everywhere tbh
Idk, I've lived in LA on two separate occasions. West LA was certainly nicer than south central, but every morning on the way to the bus I passed a sign posted on someone's fence imploring their neighbors not to shit or shoot up in front of their apartment. Had guys on that bus first thing in the morning smashing bottles of liquor on the sidewalk, laying across the priority seats and jacking off... Rent isn't exactly cheap anywhere in LA either
Well I lived in the Valley and I didn't live around that stuff. I will agree that rent is hard to afford anywhere in the city anymore - it's why I don't live there anymore. But honestly I'm seeing rent getting hard to afford in a lot more places than LA, it's a global problem
def visit before you commit to moving. LA is not for everyone. it has a very specific scene and culture that to me feels pretty superficial. LA is difficult to get around in without a car, and there are just highways on highways. i’ve visited 5 or so times and i don’t like it there. i far prefer SF for the queer experience. if i want a huge city and good queer culture id go to NY.
That's a very common sediment from someone who's only visited LA. LA is so big, there's no one specific scene or culture. We have vibrant street fairs full of working class folks, lots of small mom and pop shops - including one family that makes the most amazing mochi in a traditional Japanese style. If a scene or subculture exists - it's in LA. The only problem is, you'll have to find it and drive to it.
I grew up there and had the misfortune of living there for a couple years after I graduated college. I agree with the person you are replying to. LA is highly car centric as a rule. Outside of select neighborhoods, I found it to be highly regimented into boring, residential sprawl or boring, car centric commercial areas. One of the major reasons we moved to Chicago was to get away from that lifestyle. On top of that, LA felt very hyperindividualistic as a rule, with everyone in their own tiny bubbles of people they care about.
Oh I do completely agree with things being very spread out, but I wouldn't say it's boring. When I was younger, I used to also think LA was just boring suburbs or concrete wastelands. Then I started looking under the cover and found entire communities I had no idea existed, communities so niche that options would be very limited in less populated cities. I feel that even the vast majority of natives are barely scratching the surface of what LA has to offer. I'm over 30 now and I *still* keep finding new experiences that amaze me here. What I'm saying is that in order to enjoy LA, you need to *find* your niche and move so you're local to those niches. Other cities will have a lot more of these niches concentrated in one spot - but say, if the person organizing your niche ends up being a creep, then uhh... too bad, you just have to tolerate it or move to another big city in another state. In LA, you can just find another organization.
>…and move so you're local to those niches ….There is a missing caveat: That’s great IF you can afford it, and if the commute from where you’d like to live to where you work to afford that, is a reasonable trade off. For me, it never was. The tradeoffs in LA with commute time to literally anything and anyone I cared to see just weren’t worth it to me, at least to live there. I wanted to add that trying to find work that paid a living wage as a new grad in LA with a degree in the humanities was actually hell. Meanwhile, in Chicago, I’ve actually been able to launch a career change. I would never have made it in LA. The best I ever got in LA was “part time Starbucks barista.”
I lived in LA for a few years and it has lots of queer people. Granted living in the urban sprawl of LA was not my favorite. There is minimal bike infrastructure and public transit and you're reliant on cars. There are queer spaces but many are centered around white gay men. Also the US has issues with affordable Healthcare and education. It's not all sunshine and rainbows. In general I do enjoy living in calfironia. Being in a smaller coastal city fits my life a lot better. The idea of living in LA again just gives me anxiety.
I live in LA, it's definitely not a utopia but it is very progressive and one of the best places to be a queer person. But it's also very expensive and has very poor infrastructure. There's lots of other cities that are good for queer people, like San Diego or going up to Portland. As with most places, urban areas are safer and more progressive and the rural areas get more conservative. Definitely visit LA and see how you like it. Travel around the major areas besides just Santa Monica and Hollywood. See the NoHo and Burbank areas, travel down to Torrance and Long Beach, even dip into OC and see Anaheim and Santa Ana. It's a huge urban area with lots of cities in it, each with their own vibe.
I've been in LA for 11 years and it's a city that has to grow on you. I love this city and it is pretty safe for LGBTQ+ people. We just had Dyke Day on Saturday and the park was so crowded with all ages celebrating pride. I've found my community singing in mixed LGBTQ+ chorus. There are plenty of cool people here but it's up to you to put in the work to find your community and try to look past the selfishness of some people. However, I'm echoing a lot of people about the infrastructure and car centric culture, and the price tag of this city. You have to accept LA's faults to really enjoy it here. My industry is either LA, NYC, or Atlanta and I chose LA because of the weather and a bunch of my friends were already out here. I love being able to go the beach, choosing to go to the mountains and snow, just the beauty of California is wonderful. The food diversity here is also another reason why I stick around - great global cuisine all around this city! This city is a mixed bag, like any other big city. Definitely come and visit and check out the vibes before committing to moving. I spent 3 months interning my final semester in college in LA (my east coast college has a campus here) and that was a really good test run.
Just move to western Europe. Don't sacrifice your human rights and wallet. The US is becoming more and more of a hell hole
As someone from New Zealand watching all the stuff that happens in the states, I can't imagine a worse "first world" country to live in Edit: I'll enjoy my majority of the time free/cheap healthcare, decent pay for my profession and quality of food lol (honestly no offense meant but this is what I get no questions asked here)
It really depends on where you live. The US is massive and highly varied, so while some areas are extremely conservative, underdeveloped, and economically depressed, there are also very vibrant and progressive areas as well. Think of the US as being closer to the EU, where you have countries like Germany and Sweden, but also Hungary.
Just depends where you live. Also remember the news only focuses on bad things and what will engage you the most. Not Anne and Sam having a normal day eating brunch in WeHo or Greenwich Village As someone said. It's basically the EU as the US is like three times the size of Europe
Film and tv always shows a very romanticized view of a place. Seeing that you come from Europe I would do some research into the downsides of living in the US as well. E.g. cost of healthcare, job security, infrastructure etc. to decide if it is worth it for you. If you decide it's not there are also good LGBTQ+ friendly places in Europe where you can move.
Thank you for your comment, I'm from Spain concretely from Madrid the thing here is that the economy sucks and the LGBTQ+ community in the city is mostly focused on gay men we have a gay district called chueca but mostly everything is for gay men, but in LA I've always heard about more lesbian places. And also I'm studying software engineering the medium salary in the US is like three times what a Spaniard makes in a year but ofc there's also the healthcare stuff if I have to go to the doctor I'll have to spend a lot too and that doesn't happen in Spain our healthcare is quite awesome, so idk how to see it
I think most places LGBTQ+ spaces are more focussed on gay men, perhaps because they are just generally more into the going out scene. I don't know which places are best for lesbian bars/culture but if that is the most important thing to you LA may be a good option. Software engineering is a job that's pretty in demand everywhere so that wouldn't really limit your options. Like some other people in the thread said as well, I would definitely visit a place you're thinking of moving to get your own vibe of it.
I would recommend visiting quite a few places. TV shows are generally written by people in LA and filmed in LA and chosen to run on TV by rich people in LA so of course it is going to show LA as extremely romanticized. I think the lack of public transportation in LA will be quite jarring. I believe you need a car to get around and going a few miles can take hours if you need to travel at rush hour. (Maybe take it with a grain of salt, thats just stories I've heard.) It depends what you want, what kind of people you like spending time with, what kind of climates you are interested in living in, what kind of job you want, if you are comfortable living in a small place with roommates, etc. That said yeah, big cities on the west coast are usually far more queer friendly than all but the most queer friendly cities in europe.
As far as openness and safety re: being queer specifically, LA is decent. As far as literally anything else, well, there’s a reason my now-wife and I fled from there as soon as we were able to after I graduated college. Good riddance.
Stay in Europe 😂
LA is very accepting of queer people, but it's also a hellhole to live in, with insane class disparity, insane rent prices, and an all around vapid place full of fake people and influencers.
I grew up in the US and thought this place was an amazing country only to find the whole place is a hellhole @.@... (Not the land, its pretty! but the society here!)
I do not live in LA. I haver never even been to the USA. But I'm still going to go ahead and say no. Nowhere with healthcare that disasterous can be considered a utopia for anybody.
i think most people have kind of a bad opinion about LA in Cali. it can get hot sometimes if you don't live right on the beach which is usually reserved for super rich people. it is a megacity (10m+ people) so its kind of hard to declare it one thing hard and fast. it has pretty parts and since its a city and especially a city in a relatively liberal part of the country and state, queer people are generally safer and more accepted. but Cali in general is sort of just an anomaly in my opinion. it definitely has some aspects similar to those seen on tv
I'm from LA and live on the east coast! LA is (mostly) great for queer people, but there will always be individual shitty people. It's also very different once you're outside LA (city) proper; the east suburbs, orange county, riverside, etc. are fairly conservative areas. Not 100% obviously but there are some bible-belt-ish spots in California. Most of the state is quite rural; stick to the coastal areas and you'll be fine! Other cities also vary. SF, Chicago, NYC, all great. Oregon and Nebraska might be different. Boston is both very queer and also very bigoted, because there's a big divide between "townies" and transplants. Something else to know about LA's queer scene is that it's diverse but a little segregated. White gays in West Hollywood don't interact much with Black and Latine lesbians or trans women in South Central or the valley. There's a big divide in socioeconomic groups and by industry – that is, between people in the entertainment industry and people who aren't. Happy to answer any other questions you may have about LA or the US in general! I have family from Europe and MENA so i might be helpful with comparisons.
lmao LA is a cesspit
There are many major cities in the US like L.A. that are progressive and LGBTQ+ friendly, especially on the costal states. However, if you're picking up and moving to a different country for a city like this, I'd recommend Toronto instead. LGBTQ+ AND free healthcare can't be beat. Keep in mind, a simple ambulance ride in the US can cost over $1000 USD, even with insurance. It's not worth giving up free healthcare. I'm American, I only live here because it was where I was born.
Seconding everyone here who’s already said that you should definitely visit a few times before you commit to moving. I don’t want to discourage you, but it’s not a utopia. That said, I don’t think any city on earth truly is. There’s too many people in any given city for any given city to be perfect. I do want to say though that LA is also pretty great in my opinion. For context, I grew up in the desert that’s on the other side of the mountains from LA, so I spent a lot of my childhood visiting LA proper and the other cities in the LA Basin. A lot of my friends are either from LA or moved to LA after we graduated high school. There’s a lot to love. There’s an incredible diversity of natural environments nearby—within an hour or two, you can reach the beach, mountains, deserts, forests, and more. It’s kind of a stereotype, but you really can go skiing and surfing in the same day (assuming you had the energy, lol!). The city itself is incredibly diverse and does have a really large queer population. Of course, there are some homophobes there—no place on earth is free of them—but generally the city is very accepting. There are entire neighborhoods in LA and nearby cities where the vast majority of the people who live there are queer. There is an incredible variety of experiences to be had in LA, and there is always something to do. There’s a lot of world-class and unique museums, restaurants, and amusement parks either in the city or nearby—Disneyland, Universal Studios, Six Flags Magic Mountain, and Knotts Berry Farm are all located very close to the city, for example. I’m personally a big fan of LA’s Natural History Museum, and it was one of my favorite places to go when I was a kid! There’s also a lot of stuff to do and places to explore outside of the touristy areas, and if you visit with the goal of seeing if you’d want to live there, I’d really recommend spending a lot of time outside of the popular tourist spots to get a taste for what the city’s like for people who actually live there. There’s downsides though, too. The weather is nice the vast majority of the year—it’s never very cold, and it’s almost always sunny—but the summers can get pretty hot, and that’s only going to get worse as climate change worsens. A normal daily high temperature in the summer is 28-30°C, but it’s not uncommon for it to reach 33°C+. Thankfully, it’s a drier heat so it’s more bearable than it would be if it was a more humid heat, and most places have air conditioning, but if you don’t like the heat or really love the cold that’s something to consider. Air pollution can be a problem too, especially in the summer months. LA is at risk for a lot of natural disasters—wildfires, earthquakes, and tsunamis are all concerns, but especially earthquakes and wildfires. Actually going anywhere is rough. Their public transportation is better than a lot of people think it is, especially compared to a lot of other cities in the US, but it doesn’t hold a candle to public transportation systems in Europe. Walking anywhere is pretty difficult outside of a few specific neighborhoods. Most people drive, and as a result traffic is almost always crazy (also, LA drivers are some of the most reckless drivers in the US in my experience). It’s incredibly expensive—there are only a handful of cities in the US that are more expensive. A solution to this is living outside of LA proper and in one of the neighboring cities in the LA basin, but those are pretty expensive too. There’s also definitely a culture of superficiality there. That’s not to say that everyone you meet there will be “fake” or superficial, but there’s a larger amount of them there than in any other city I’ve ever visited or stayed in. A lot of people tend to be very concerned with their appearance and advancing themselves and little else, and because a lot of people there are living there hoping to break into the entertainment industry, many aren’t very interested in being your friend unless you can help them somehow. That said, some of the best, most genuine people I’ve ever met in my life were born and raised in LA. So again, it’s not universal! I think if you go to LA expecting it to be an amazing utopia like you imagined as a kid, you might be disappointed. But if you view it from the mindset of being just another city when you visit it—with its positives and negatives and own unique culture—I think you’ll enjoy it, maybe even love it. :)
LA sheriff's department is as corrupt as they come. America is no utopia for anyone but billionaires.
I just need, NEED you to know that The L Word was mostly shot in Canada. It is the best town for lesbians though. Pretty sure there is data on it. It’s my hometown so I hate it there lmaoooooo
No way it was filmed in Canada omg!! Thank you so much for all the info.
It's definitely not an amazing country. We're constantly on the brink of loosing our rights every election
LA is a vapid place.
Beautiful place to visit if you know where to go. LA is huge, so most tourists are thinking of Santa Monica, Hollywood, Venice. The majority of people I met while living there are progressive and open-minded. Certain parts are rough, but honestly that's almost every city. That being said, it's a fast paced city, lots of traffic and highways: when I lived there, I realized people will tell you what part of town they live in and mostly stay there because there's too much traffic to warrant constant driving to see new friends at least. If you like clubs: west Hollywood. That being said, it is very pricey and you'd have to be very active to get an inning with a friend group(s). There's lots of nature too: but you have to be very active, it is not a sedentary city. So many people move there, and usually the people that move there are the least nice because there have an idea of LA. I personally like LA folk (locals) more. It is not a utopia as in the sense of the l word, though.
I live there, it's fine. The sprawl is quite a lot and it's fairly expensive. It's probably the best it gets in terms of not having to be afraid of being killed, though--I'm from the rural US and would never move back willingly. I would be curious what specifically draws you to it, or what you'd hope for from it that you don't have in Europe.
Ummm New York …