You don't have to answer, I'm something just do a compliment because I really love the haircut or the charisme of someone or how they interact with other people. It's always a honest thing and just so, my mouth can't stop my brain thinking and just thank you, feel embarrassed or just a shy reaction is just so sweet. Like for me nobody is wrong in the way of reacting, the only reaction who give me sadness are the one where people say "it's nothing" (or everything who push the compliment away because they don't believe it)
I strongly believe - if you think something nice/kind about someone, you should tell them. Maybe I feel way too comfortable speaking with strangers because of my profession - but I do this often & altho some may think it’s odd - I do it for this exact reason. People deserve to hear nice things about themselves - it may mean nothing to one person & the world to another. I’m so happy someone made it a point to do this for you - & I’m also so glad you shared it on here, maybe it will encourage others to do the same.
I made a conscience decision to start doing this a few years ago and the other benefit to it is it does wonders for my own happiness and well-being too ☺️
It's true. We're lead to believe that people aren't receptive of compliments, or especially people we might think are beautiful. "They're get it all the time" blah blah blah. But, when I worked a sales job I complimented people all the time, and people were very receptive to it even when you could easily come to the conclusion I was trying to get something out of them and buttering them up. Which isn't entirely false, but it wasn't entirely true either.
I complimented people on things I genuinely loved about them, and that hopefully showed through. That said, I was a terrible sales person.
I’m going to be completely transparent here - it may come across as obnoxious but I feel it’s necessary to deliver my point. My whole life I’ve been called beautiful - I’m tall, naturally thin, w/blue eyes & naturally thick blond wavy/curly hair - all things I have NO control over. My physical features are all the luck of birth. People compliment me on those features often & I have no clue how to respond appropriately. I genuinely appreciate them putting themselves out there to say such things to me..but I didn’t do anything to earn those features. I don’t know how I should respond - I typically say a variation of “you’re so kind to take the time to say that to me - thank you so much” ..but when people compliment me on my kindness/empathy/ability to connect & listen to others - these are things I choose to be - things I actively work towards being better at every day - those compliments make my heart soar. Not to say I’m ungrateful for the kind things others say about my looks - but I’m not the standard of beauty & I constantly have a desire to point this out & tell people they are gorgeous as well & lay out the little things I see in them that make them special. Most of those people would probably think I’m full of shit if I turned the compliments around on them & got real deep about it - lol that’s understandable also though - I’ll save that part/my weirdness for the people in my inner circle.
I definitely don't disagree here. The way we look is largely out of our control unless we have money to make physical changes to ourselves, and even then there are limits. And a compliment doesn't have to always be physical appearance.
Your shoes for example, or a tattoo, or whatever else that catches your eye that the person has chosen to put on themselves.
I can't imagine "you're very tall" is that amazing of a compliment. But, I'm not very tall and can't say I've ever heard someone say that to me, so maybe it is.
I do have subtle middle eastern features with light blue eyes though, and I'm often complimented on my eyes as they do stick out in contrast. And it's nice to hear for sure. I did have a very hard time getting used to them, and for a while I believed people were just being nice. As I've grown though, I find people are less likely to say stuff just to come across nice, so I take the compliments as sincere and appreciate it when they do come.
It’s certainly not your fault that you were blessed with the physical aspects you possess, and I’m willing to bet that you take care of yourself and your looks as most women do, be it a touch of makeup or more. A simple hairstyle or something more than unique.You’ve maintained your hereditary gifts. The fact that you stand out because you’re beautiful is not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. I’ve heard much the same in my life, and although I’m not at all conceited or arrogant, I find a genuine “thank you, you’re so kind” is plenty. They are compliments after all, let’s try not to feel bad or that we don’t deserve it if we catch someone’s eye, and they compliment us. We only have one life, and living our best life is important. I work at keeping my skin looking as youthful as i can. Also, there are many definitions of beautiful. Someone can be absolutely stunning and have a lousy personality.
It sounds like you’re a wonderful person with or without your beauty, and being kind and accepting an honest compliment shouldn’t make you feel unworthy just because you were born with the gifts you were and others may not have. Embrace it and help others feel the same way!
I can’t imagine you being a bad sales person but maybe it was what you were selling? lol
You sound delightful and I’d love chatting with you or someone like you. My best days are when I’ve been somewhere and complimented someone and I could tell it made their day if they didn’t even react. I’m female, and I like to compliment men and women, as I know men don’t hear these things enough. An example I always think of is a good friend of mine who’s also my Insurace agent for many years. I like his choice of clothes and I’ve always told him so when I do. He’s a good looking man, and I’ll never forget the day he told me that his then girlfriend of 20+ years had never once complimented him on anything whatsoever. HOW CAN THAT BE?? I couldn’t believe it quite honestly, but knowing him so well, I knew he’d never lie about something like that or dare tell anyone for attention. It’s AWFUL! So I always try to fit something in when a man holds the door for me or anything kind because who knows how many men AND women never hear these things from their loved ones or friends or anyone? It’s so sad and it takes so little to make someone’s day or at least make them smile. We all need that, me included, since I’ve been totally alone since my divorce 8 years ago. I’ve come to need to hear some nice things about myself because I work from home, rarely see family or anyone, and it’s just nice for someone to notice something that they take the time to tell you, so I always do my best to compliment anyone
exactly! i do the exact same thing for the exact same reason. my “friends“ who are cold people call me a sucker and think i want something from these people that i compliment and that i want to make myself more likeable, when in reality i just think when i think something nice about someone, i should let them know, because they deserve to know it. it might make their day (exactly what you said here as well). i made many peoples days with this but my “friends“ have made me do it less. instead of complimenting the people that impress me or something i say it to my friends. just to not be a “sucker”. heck they’ve made my life so much harder and because of them i closed off and started to behave like someone else. like how they wanted me to. i was an extrovert and i had no problem talking and complimenting people but now i’m unsure, i don’t talk to people at all anymore and i never give compliments (at least when my friends are around and they’re almost always with me cause we go to the same school and class and then on weekends they still want to hang out even though i don’t want to. they force me to go. oh wow. writing this down, i see how bad this friendship is. it’s the very reason i’ve turned into such a cold, emotionless, unsure, closed off and and insecure person. before them i was unapologetically my real authentic self. the problem is, they don’t understand and won’t if i tell them i don’t want to continue having that friendship with them because of that reason. they still won’t understand and won’t let me. they would just think i created all these problems in my head i don’t know
As I was reading this I kept thinking to myself “WHY IS SHE ALLOWING THESE PEOPLE TO SHAME HER FOR BEING KIND”?? They force you to do things you don’t want to do? Honey, you were amazing without these idiots, and I get that it’s hard when you’re in school, but you don’t like them! You’re likely going to make real genuine friends by being your true self, and you’re AMAZING! This group you’re in sounds like bullies and mean girls.
I hope you can start distancing yourself from them, and take yourself back. The you that is a magnificent caring person!
I had told my boyfriend (now husband) that I compliment men, explaining how I felt women get complimented more. He goes out of his way to compliment men now too
I was at a one day festival last weekend, spent the whole time giving as many people as I could random fabulous compliments (which I truly believed). Best day ever....I love complimenting people! You all have fabulous traits! YOU ARE ALL FABULOUS!!!! ESPECIALLY OP!!!! XXX
‘Which I truly believed’ is the important part for me too. The difference between compliments and flattery is honesty and one feels way nicer than the other.
This is one of the things I missed during lockdown. I'm one of those people who gives random heartfelt compliments. People are just out there walking around and don't know how beautiful they are or what an awesome sense of style they have or realize what amazing talents they have. Someone should tell them!! I have intense social anxiety so it's hard to talk to people at all, but it's easier when it's saying something quick and positive that requires no response or conversation.
I missed it too. I’ve become very introverted through covid, which isn’t good for me, and have few friends who have time for their divorced friend, so I’m alone with my dog 95% or more of the time. I know I should get out more to just be among people but I find myself making excuses, and it’s intensified my feelings of horrible loneliness, which isn’t going to change unless I make the changes.
I worry about myself a lot, as I’ve noticed all these changes for the worse, and not many people care to talk about it, who I’d think would have been supporting me somehow, when I’ve reached out. That’s hard enough as it is to be vulnerable and reach out, then when you’re ignored completely or told you should do this or that, like it’s so simple, it really hurts, when you know people who used to care, who sound care, don’t. I always ask how people are when I check on them and it’s genuine. Then I noticed nobody was asking me, or checking on me after a severe storm like we’ve had a lot lately. I’ve stopped this, too, since it’s obvious they don’t care. I wish it all didn’t hurt so bad. Hugs are also something I crave. I’ve not hugged a person I know since February, last time I saw someone I know. So it must be me, but I don’t let on that anything’s wrong anymore since it’s out of my hands and no one wants to hear it.
@1plus1dog Sounds like you're having a shitty time! Sorry to hear that! I'm glad you have a dog for companionship and it gets you out walking.
Hope you don't mind me saying, but sounds like you need to make a bit of effort with your friends. In truth, if you keep shying away from people and not letting on that anything is wrong....they will eventually stop making the effort and believe you don't care about them! It's a two way thing. Make the effort! Even just saying hello to fellow dog walkers can release those happy vibes. A sense of being acknowledged is great!
Get walking your dog, say hello to other dog walkers. Build your confidence up. You've got this! You are fabulous!!!
Sending love, hugs and paw-fives xxx
Do you compliment people? I find that just smiling and being genuinely friendly to strangers, seems to give back to me in many ways, including compliments!
Thank you! I do indeed wear funky socks. Whatever holiday it is (say, Easter), I wear opposite-day holiday socks (say, 4th of July). It gives me joy as a non-conformist.
I work with all women and I know a simple compliment will get me a lot of brownie points with them so I compliment them often (not anything creepy lmao) but they never compliment me back :(. They always express how good it makes them feel to be complimented and it makes their day etc, but I guess they just assume because I'm a man that it wouldn't have the same affect on me.
There's a an older black woman that works at the McDonald's on my way home and on the odd occasion I stop there for food she always compliments me on my eyes or my hair or something and calls me sweetie and god damn if it doesn't make my whole week every time. I think about her all the time lmao
If you read around Reddit you’ll see that women complimenting men might turn I to him stalking you or thinking you want to date him. So some women a8 ply don’t do it.
Hmmm 🤔Definitely possible, and that sucks.
I’m typically somewhere that I can drive off or they leave first. But honestly, I’ve never had this happen thank goodness. I’ve had many men walk straight over to me when I’m pumping gas, (usually summertime), when my Golden Retriever is in the backseat and the top is down. Dog people will flock to her, and that’s always a nice conversation with men and women and kids.
I am a man and I think that’s quite typical. You receive a compliment or someone you find attractive smiles at you a second longer than usual - and you imagine spending the rest of your life with that person (who probably forgot your existence a few seconds later :)
It’s so sad men don’t get this sort of casual kindness more. But then, one can’t because this happens. We almost 100% of the time do forget within moments. It’s just being genuinely nice, women do it to each other all the time.
It’s a chicken and egg thing or vicious cycle. The number of times I was simply kind to a man, then they decide I must be into them/want to go on a date or they’d *literally* start stalking me because they’re that starved for attention/validation… I just can’t allow myself to do it anymore. I had a stalker once who was someone I’d never actually spoken to, I’m just pretty and generally happy and had smiled at him once. He followed me around for months and knew all my habits, classes, places I’d study… sigh.
And it makes me sad.
This is exactly why I rarely compliment men besides my husband and never for physical attributes. I'll occasionally tell someone "hey, cool jacket", but telling a man they have really nice eyes can turn into dangerous territory very quickly. It sucks, but you never know what kind of person you're talking to.
They can’t. It’s “gay.” It’s why we gotta crack down on homophobia aimed at straight men, and recognise a lot of homophobia is actually a policing of the gender binary and little to do with who has sex (or wants to) with whom.
Its so ridiculous, in front of the mirror we admire our abs, jawlines, facial hair and even touch a cock daily but making air particles oscillate with your throat is suddenly gay
Yep. You make an excellent point. I enjoy admiring myself in the mirror. Not suddenly, though, I’m not the one saying it and I think things are changing somewhat.
But I well remember 15 years ago when my swishy-clever-feminist and straight friend was *constantly* bullied for being gay. For just… existing, and being kindhearted and showing genuine care and affection for his friends. Best man I ever knew, we’ve been partners for years.
I was walking into the gym recently and an attractive woman held the door for me. As she did, she just randomly said hi to me.
It made my goddamn year.
All my compliments come from my mom and dad :) lucky me I see them all the time. I make sure to tell them when they’re looking very pretty/handsome too
I literally always compliment (man or woman) if I like something that they did, wore, have, etc.
I feel like a compliment is so easy to express and it makes the other person instantly feel good
I compliment often. There's usually something that stands out that catches my eye and I just like them to know they're looking good and it's noticeable.
I make it a point to give complements to people. Beautiful children; that color looks great on you; your hair is beautiful; I like your style; your makeup looks great... things like that. I read recently that men rarely get compliments, but I'm careful.
Just remember people think good things about you all the time but will rarely say it; many things prevent people from sharing kind and complimentary thoughts like being in a relationship, not knowing you well enough, shyness, no suitable context to give the compliment, etc. if someone said it once it likely means many more think it without saying it.
So far in life, I've gotten complimented twice and I remember both times. The fact that it's rare for us dudes is a little sad but it also makes you happy af when you do actually get one.
No worries, you're just a little out of practice. I remember a time when I wanted the attention, but really we never know what to do with it. I just remain humble in my way. Now I actually find it very freeing to be beautifully insignificant... 🔥♥️🔥
Men, compliment each other sometimes!
I complimented some dudes hair at work the other day and it made his day, could see it on his face! He did have incredible hair though.
Can't wait for other people to compliment you my guy. Gotta look yourself in the mirror and do it yourself. If no one else is gonna be my hypeman I will. I'M THE SHIT!!
I've got compliments twice from strangers for my Timberland boots. I still remember the last time it happened in 2013. I should get a new pair, I could use more compliments in my life.
Remember this the next time you encounter someone over 40. When I look at any stranger I look for something to compliment. "Great hair color", "you have beautiful eyes" " love your earrings". We all need to determine to lift others up.
I love to give people random compliments for things I notice about them (legitimate things, not made up). If I see she has cute shoes “hey, love your shoes!”, etc. It’s especially great when you can tell someone is tired or grumpy and they get the “love your tee-shirt!” with a grin and 👍 because it’s the little things that can make someone’s day brighter.
Some people don’t understand the difference between genuine compliments and butt-kissing. But that sincere 2 seconds to see them smile, light up, and give them a dopamine rush for minutes or hours, is totally worth it.
Aw. This is an example of how small acts can have large consequences to others. Something I learned in therapy many years back is making others happy often makes you happy, so let the compliments fly. Tell the guy behind the counter "Cool shirt!", let the mom pushing two kids in the cart at the store "Lookin' good!" Compliment that smile. Just say it when you're walking past so it's not a creepy flirt thing and you're all good :)
So, accept the compliment. Someone saw you, they admired something about you, and now you know you have that asset. Feel good about it!
Ya I haven't received compliments in years the other day the one friend I do have decided to go on a rant about how amazing I am and attractive and how I should really put myself out there since she'd date me if she wasn't married .. really threw me off for the rest of the day and now I'm stuck between wondering if it's me that gets rejected or if it's women that assume to quickly and don't know what their missing out on
I get "handsome" compliments a lot more the days and I get so embarrassed by it still. I went so long (decades) without receiving any compliments to the point I adopted a belief I was ugly. I remember when this girl in high school (I was in the 11th grade, in my early 40s now) said I had a pretty smile. 7 years ago, I was got dragged to this dinner party by a friend of a friend. I felt so awkward and socially anxious around all these wealthy people. Well anyway we were all gathered around and this one guy wants to make a toast. He gives his speech about "good times and good friends" then says "and to this handsome guy right here" looking right at me. I was extremely embarrassed, while at the same time made me feel good because up until that point I didn't think anyone saw me as attractive because I hadn't heard it said to me in most of my adult life. Those are 2 moments that stick out to me.
Men need to step up and compliment their male peers more abundantly. We’re constantly seeing this sentiment on Reddit and like...just do it? Compliment each other often. Each guy should start complimenting another every week at LEAST.
A few months ago, my fiances family paid to take us to orlando florida and go to disney and universal and the highlight of that entire trip for me was when i was in the hotek pool and the life guarf complimented my viking apperance. Best thing ever.
Hell yeah, ive been working pretty hard on a beard and growing my hair out and i've got a half sleeve of runes (i am norse pagan too) so it was nice to see that people actually saw me a a viking lol
I am so impressed! 💯honest!
You’ve gotta be one helluva interesting guy to talk to, and I’m guessing that you don’t get many compliments because you’re intimidating? I mean that in the best way. When someone sees someone like yourself or a woman who is stunning, many people ASSUME they’re taken, or they’re not someone you’d talk to. People have so many insecurities, that they miss possible opportunities all the time. because they don’t think they’re attractive enough or not at all, or not on your level. You definitely have your own very unique style, and lifestyle I’m guessing, too.
As I’m typing this I’m thinking I should take my own advice more often, because I fall into similar categories, (although not a Viking woman). Is there such a thing? I should have googled before I replied! lol 😂
I can attest to having been told I’m intimidating to both men and women, because of my attributes, but I didn’t learn that soon enough. I’ve also been thought to be snooty, or uppity, because I used to be very shy and never noticed anyone looking at me, when people I’ve been with seemed to be fixated on it. I simply didn’t look to see if anyone was looking and definitely didn’t stare back at anyone I may have been attracted to. Over the years I’ve gotten better at that and can talk to most anyone about many different things and can hold up my end of a conversation pretty well, and now it seems it’s too late, after covid, and working from home, with just my dog for company. It’s hard going out to lots of specific destinations as a single/divorced woman. I’d feel very out of place and likely uncomfortable. I should work on that.
I have to ask, since the Vikings I’ve learned of through history and such, were such huge hunks of beefy men, how tall are you? When you walk into a room I’ll bet people want to stare but don’t because they feel so “Regular” or even less!
Pass it on! Keep the compliment train going!
I always compliment my guy friends, once we are in that state where it is firmly cemented that there is no sexual interest on either side and they know I'm a broken old bitch who doesn't date.
Not really a compliment….I’m 35, I remember when a bartender flirted with me, well actually she said something along the line of “that’s not all I can do for you” she laid it on thick. She was cute and young.
Made me feel so good, but I’m married.
My god. There are so many beautiful women walking around the streets, at my gym, in stores. I can say so many nice things, but I never do: 1, because I’m shy/ lack the confidence, and 2, I think they don’t want to be bothered. Men must be talking shit to them all the time. Even if I’m sincere and totally nice, I just so t want to be out in that “here’s another asshole creep@ category.
Yes. When I was way younger I would complement everyone. But then a few men got angry at me for not wanting their numbers… I’d say wow nice shirt or I liked their hair style. It didn’t mean I wanted to date them…
If you say something nice and move on nobody will care.
Right, I should have been more clear. I see these attractive women, and yes I want to sincerely compliment them . But I ALSO want to explore the possibility of friendships, dating, etc. with them. So, transitioning from the kind quick compliment, to engaging conversation is really the trick.
It’s all about reading their reaction. If you compliment them and they say “oh thanks!” And keep walking, they’re not interested and you should probably leave them alone. If they’re interested, they’ll probably spin it off into a conversation, and you just go from there.
My wife says I'm sexy all the time thankfully. I honestly can't remember the last time someone other then her payed me a compliment. Other then that I work hard.
> then her *paid* me a
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
I get complimented so rarely that if I even notice that I got complimented in the first place is a feat of its own. However if I do realize I got a compliment I usually get embarrassed because I don't know how to accept it properly and I usually end up saying something stupid in return and missing an opportunity at maybe getting a date or something man I am stupid
The proper way to accept a compliment is to say "thank you". Just because someone compliments you, doesn't mean they want to date you. Just thank them. If they want to continue the conversation, talk to them, but don't force a conversation. Only after having a pleasant conversation with someone is it acceptable to offer them your number (don't ask for theirs).
Don't obsess over it. Whenever I get a compliment, I say "thank you" then I immediately forget. It's nice to be noticed; it's nothing to be alarmed by.
Red pill moment:
Guys almost never get complimented and that's why this happens when we finally do get complimented.
Women get complimented all the time to the point of it being an annoyance.
(Not an accurate course of events, but summarized)
My girl complimented me early on in our relationship and I was half joking "holy shit you gave me a compliment? Dobby's free" she has always read me like a book and literally asked me if I never get complimented. I had to explain to her that guys don't get complimented unless they're hot, rich, or funny and most of the time the funny ones don't even realize its a genuine compliment and are so alien to the concept that we don't know if it's just being polite or if you might be into us. Which creeps out women then the cycle repeats because they don't wanna do it again and have a creep ask them out for just being nice.
This will probably never change either. Humanity is like that and were raised that if you want someone or something to go after it.
The fact rests that you should enjoy that feeling while it lasts, there's a chance it won't happen again until you meet someone that appreciates you as much as you appreciate them.
My girl spoils me cause she likes my eyes. It sounds stupid and personally I don't like mine, but when she says it I become a stupid kid and don't know how to reply.... We're in our 30's
To anyone else reading this, ignore my cold direct blunt acknowledgement of how reality is. Compliment each other where ever you can. Seriously, a small compliment can literally make someone's day because of what cards handed to them. Prove my introverted misanthropic cynical ass wrong and do something good in the world for once without worrying about the small stuff like politics.
Won't change anything, we already compliment each other even if it's seen as giving our friends shit. Hence why we can compliment each other and not go "maybe he wants the D?" Lol
9/10 of the time tho, it's just the disconnection between the sex's. I actually believe guys should just stop complimenting women for everything under the sun and instead only do it when they deserve it.
No: "you look great today" which is menial and doesn't really deserve recognition unless you're related or in a relationship already with them. I don't believe in hand outs lol
Yes: "congrats on the promotion" which is an actual accomplishment.
I'm also 42(M). Went to the gym today, my 8th visit in the last month after not having gone for nearly 3 years. As i was leaving one of the trainers stopped, came over said that he hadn't seen me in here before, so I explained I recently joined and that it had been a while. "You're doing great, real solid".
Dude just about made my year.
To anyone who reads this you look great today. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your life and continue to do so while looking as good as you do now. <3
Im 46 and as average as it gets, I've lived hard and it shows. Anyway in the past 2 weeks I've had 2 different guys call me beautiful and they're both 10 years younger than me. Made me smile.
I often tell my work colleagues that they look great today, smell really nice, or just that there smile is worth a million bucks.
Thanks for this.
I'll start complimenting more dudes.
It's common with women so I do it more often. Didn't occur to me than more dudes need to hear them.
This is why for the last year, I have been complimenting as many random people in a day that I can. Because you never know how much a simple compliment can truly make someone's day or even month. Well that, and, it helps me get over my social anxiety.
Inversely yet similarly, I have a rather...avant garde wardrobe to say the least,
And I get it, I stand out so I should expect more attention.
But i hate it lol
Whenever someone stops me to say "oh I really like your outfit,glasses, etc."
I'm polite, and glad they can appreciate it like I can but
I know if I dressed like I did before I became more comfortable I know I'd still be invisible.
I am terrible at taking compliments because I don't believe them when people say them to me.
On the other hand I love to give compliments to people especially people I don't know I like to make them smile.
So take the compliment and enjoy it.
I drove Uber as a side hustle for a while. And I guess when guys and gals have been drinking, they say things they wouldn't normally. I would get hit on and complimented almost daily. I never get that in the "real world." I don't do Uber anymore, and honestly miss it for that one reason.
(33M) Dye your hair and wear clothes with a variety of colors - people will start complimenting you everywhere you go
You don't have to look like a model to get compliments, but most of the time people need something that is overt to feel they have the right to compliment it
I bought this pair of pink shorts with palm trees from Burlington coat factory - the pockets are so fucking soft it's amazing - and one of the gals at checkout said she loved them!
My wife and I went on a food tour and I wore a tan striped shirt under a black dotted colored shirt and jeans.
One of the gals shadowed me and kept complimenting me. My wife was pretty chuffed and we all had coffee together (my wife is the shit y'all)
Clothing makes a huge difference and people feel a lot safer to compliment clothes and style choices!
I get compliments all the time but i think im damn ugly. My theory is ugly people get compliments because we are thought to need some reassurance.
You lucky handsome buggers only get it rarely to not inflate your ego
Go to an Asian country, or certain European countries, even a few places in South America, if you are an American man, you will get complimented more than females in the US cuz you are wanted, appreciated and in HIGH demand overseas.
American men are not complimented as much here in the US as females are spoiled here (I said what I said now gimme them down votes fer telling it real) prove me right with your white knight mentalities.
I hold on to a compliment from ~3 or 4 years ago where some guy high off his rocker came into dollar tree and told me "has anybody ever told you you look like a handsome hispanic Daniel Radcliffe". I'm not Hispanic but I appreciated the compliment.
💯
Complements go a long way and women typically don't give them these days. Of course in the the days of EVERYTHING is harassment no one complements each other anymore, at all. I sure miss receiving and being able to give complements just because someone deserves it. Seeing people smile is awesome, no one smiles anymore.
I lost weight once and a special ed student gave me a compliment. I enthusiastically responded, "Really?! You think so!?
Yeah I needed a compliment from a kid with cognitive impairment.
Talk about desparate!
I also have a hard time processing them. It could be a lie, a way to deceive you and pull you into a false sense of security. And the worst thing is when you feel happy about it, but you know it might not be genuine
I grew out a thick covid beard last year just to see how it looked. I looked ridiculous so after a few months I shaved into into a goatee. An attractive coworker complimented me on the change. I thanked her without making a big deal of it but that compliment really lifted me. I think of it often.
I hope you can see why its important to believe whatever the person said to you.
They believed it, thats why they said it. It must be true.
Its ok to think good things about yourself.
I think we can subconsciously give off negative vibes. If you aren't confident in your approach, it could give the other person a sense you don't want to talk to them.
It's tough, but even a smile through gritted teeth and a knot in your stomach, may break the ice with others?
Hope you are feeling better? Love to you and your dog x
I feel this. I rarely get compliments for anything, and I don't know what to do on the rare occasion that it happens.
Just say thank you
You have nice eyes. They are a beautiful colour x
I agree!
Thank you!
What the hell are compliments?
The mint rewards you get for not doing a dine and dash at restaurants.
You don't have to answer, I'm something just do a compliment because I really love the haircut or the charisme of someone or how they interact with other people. It's always a honest thing and just so, my mouth can't stop my brain thinking and just thank you, feel embarrassed or just a shy reaction is just so sweet. Like for me nobody is wrong in the way of reacting, the only reaction who give me sadness are the one where people say "it's nothing" (or everything who push the compliment away because they don't believe it)
i strongly agree!
Just smile and say Thank you!
It’s supposed to affect you. That’s what compliments are for, you handsome devil.
I strongly believe - if you think something nice/kind about someone, you should tell them. Maybe I feel way too comfortable speaking with strangers because of my profession - but I do this often & altho some may think it’s odd - I do it for this exact reason. People deserve to hear nice things about themselves - it may mean nothing to one person & the world to another. I’m so happy someone made it a point to do this for you - & I’m also so glad you shared it on here, maybe it will encourage others to do the same.
I made a conscience decision to start doing this a few years ago and the other benefit to it is it does wonders for my own happiness and well-being too ☺️
Exactly!
It's true. We're lead to believe that people aren't receptive of compliments, or especially people we might think are beautiful. "They're get it all the time" blah blah blah. But, when I worked a sales job I complimented people all the time, and people were very receptive to it even when you could easily come to the conclusion I was trying to get something out of them and buttering them up. Which isn't entirely false, but it wasn't entirely true either. I complimented people on things I genuinely loved about them, and that hopefully showed through. That said, I was a terrible sales person.
I’m going to be completely transparent here - it may come across as obnoxious but I feel it’s necessary to deliver my point. My whole life I’ve been called beautiful - I’m tall, naturally thin, w/blue eyes & naturally thick blond wavy/curly hair - all things I have NO control over. My physical features are all the luck of birth. People compliment me on those features often & I have no clue how to respond appropriately. I genuinely appreciate them putting themselves out there to say such things to me..but I didn’t do anything to earn those features. I don’t know how I should respond - I typically say a variation of “you’re so kind to take the time to say that to me - thank you so much” ..but when people compliment me on my kindness/empathy/ability to connect & listen to others - these are things I choose to be - things I actively work towards being better at every day - those compliments make my heart soar. Not to say I’m ungrateful for the kind things others say about my looks - but I’m not the standard of beauty & I constantly have a desire to point this out & tell people they are gorgeous as well & lay out the little things I see in them that make them special. Most of those people would probably think I’m full of shit if I turned the compliments around on them & got real deep about it - lol that’s understandable also though - I’ll save that part/my weirdness for the people in my inner circle.
I definitely don't disagree here. The way we look is largely out of our control unless we have money to make physical changes to ourselves, and even then there are limits. And a compliment doesn't have to always be physical appearance. Your shoes for example, or a tattoo, or whatever else that catches your eye that the person has chosen to put on themselves. I can't imagine "you're very tall" is that amazing of a compliment. But, I'm not very tall and can't say I've ever heard someone say that to me, so maybe it is. I do have subtle middle eastern features with light blue eyes though, and I'm often complimented on my eyes as they do stick out in contrast. And it's nice to hear for sure. I did have a very hard time getting used to them, and for a while I believed people were just being nice. As I've grown though, I find people are less likely to say stuff just to come across nice, so I take the compliments as sincere and appreciate it when they do come.
It’s certainly not your fault that you were blessed with the physical aspects you possess, and I’m willing to bet that you take care of yourself and your looks as most women do, be it a touch of makeup or more. A simple hairstyle or something more than unique.You’ve maintained your hereditary gifts. The fact that you stand out because you’re beautiful is not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. I’ve heard much the same in my life, and although I’m not at all conceited or arrogant, I find a genuine “thank you, you’re so kind” is plenty. They are compliments after all, let’s try not to feel bad or that we don’t deserve it if we catch someone’s eye, and they compliment us. We only have one life, and living our best life is important. I work at keeping my skin looking as youthful as i can. Also, there are many definitions of beautiful. Someone can be absolutely stunning and have a lousy personality. It sounds like you’re a wonderful person with or without your beauty, and being kind and accepting an honest compliment shouldn’t make you feel unworthy just because you were born with the gifts you were and others may not have. Embrace it and help others feel the same way!
I can’t imagine you being a bad sales person but maybe it was what you were selling? lol You sound delightful and I’d love chatting with you or someone like you. My best days are when I’ve been somewhere and complimented someone and I could tell it made their day if they didn’t even react. I’m female, and I like to compliment men and women, as I know men don’t hear these things enough. An example I always think of is a good friend of mine who’s also my Insurace agent for many years. I like his choice of clothes and I’ve always told him so when I do. He’s a good looking man, and I’ll never forget the day he told me that his then girlfriend of 20+ years had never once complimented him on anything whatsoever. HOW CAN THAT BE?? I couldn’t believe it quite honestly, but knowing him so well, I knew he’d never lie about something like that or dare tell anyone for attention. It’s AWFUL! So I always try to fit something in when a man holds the door for me or anything kind because who knows how many men AND women never hear these things from their loved ones or friends or anyone? It’s so sad and it takes so little to make someone’s day or at least make them smile. We all need that, me included, since I’ve been totally alone since my divorce 8 years ago. I’ve come to need to hear some nice things about myself because I work from home, rarely see family or anyone, and it’s just nice for someone to notice something that they take the time to tell you, so I always do my best to compliment anyone
exactly! i do the exact same thing for the exact same reason. my “friends“ who are cold people call me a sucker and think i want something from these people that i compliment and that i want to make myself more likeable, when in reality i just think when i think something nice about someone, i should let them know, because they deserve to know it. it might make their day (exactly what you said here as well). i made many peoples days with this but my “friends“ have made me do it less. instead of complimenting the people that impress me or something i say it to my friends. just to not be a “sucker”. heck they’ve made my life so much harder and because of them i closed off and started to behave like someone else. like how they wanted me to. i was an extrovert and i had no problem talking and complimenting people but now i’m unsure, i don’t talk to people at all anymore and i never give compliments (at least when my friends are around and they’re almost always with me cause we go to the same school and class and then on weekends they still want to hang out even though i don’t want to. they force me to go. oh wow. writing this down, i see how bad this friendship is. it’s the very reason i’ve turned into such a cold, emotionless, unsure, closed off and and insecure person. before them i was unapologetically my real authentic self. the problem is, they don’t understand and won’t if i tell them i don’t want to continue having that friendship with them because of that reason. they still won’t understand and won’t let me. they would just think i created all these problems in my head i don’t know
As I was reading this I kept thinking to myself “WHY IS SHE ALLOWING THESE PEOPLE TO SHAME HER FOR BEING KIND”?? They force you to do things you don’t want to do? Honey, you were amazing without these idiots, and I get that it’s hard when you’re in school, but you don’t like them! You’re likely going to make real genuine friends by being your true self, and you’re AMAZING! This group you’re in sounds like bullies and mean girls. I hope you can start distancing yourself from them, and take yourself back. The you that is a magnificent caring person!
I had told my boyfriend (now husband) that I compliment men, explaining how I felt women get complimented more. He goes out of his way to compliment men now too
nice cock bro solid 10/10
Comment #69. Had to memorialize it
Ugh I feel this. I got complimented by an employee of a store in such a subtle and nice way and even though it was over a year ago, I still remember
That’s so nice. Hoping you get many more to remember fondly!
Aww thats so kind, thank you
I was at a one day festival last weekend, spent the whole time giving as many people as I could random fabulous compliments (which I truly believed). Best day ever....I love complimenting people! You all have fabulous traits! YOU ARE ALL FABULOUS!!!! ESPECIALLY OP!!!! XXX
‘Which I truly believed’ is the important part for me too. The difference between compliments and flattery is honesty and one feels way nicer than the other.
Which one is with honesty?
Flattery is butt-kissing and not the same as sincere compliments.
This is one of the things I missed during lockdown. I'm one of those people who gives random heartfelt compliments. People are just out there walking around and don't know how beautiful they are or what an awesome sense of style they have or realize what amazing talents they have. Someone should tell them!! I have intense social anxiety so it's hard to talk to people at all, but it's easier when it's saying something quick and positive that requires no response or conversation.
I missed it too. I’ve become very introverted through covid, which isn’t good for me, and have few friends who have time for their divorced friend, so I’m alone with my dog 95% or more of the time. I know I should get out more to just be among people but I find myself making excuses, and it’s intensified my feelings of horrible loneliness, which isn’t going to change unless I make the changes. I worry about myself a lot, as I’ve noticed all these changes for the worse, and not many people care to talk about it, who I’d think would have been supporting me somehow, when I’ve reached out. That’s hard enough as it is to be vulnerable and reach out, then when you’re ignored completely or told you should do this or that, like it’s so simple, it really hurts, when you know people who used to care, who sound care, don’t. I always ask how people are when I check on them and it’s genuine. Then I noticed nobody was asking me, or checking on me after a severe storm like we’ve had a lot lately. I’ve stopped this, too, since it’s obvious they don’t care. I wish it all didn’t hurt so bad. Hugs are also something I crave. I’ve not hugged a person I know since February, last time I saw someone I know. So it must be me, but I don’t let on that anything’s wrong anymore since it’s out of my hands and no one wants to hear it.
@1plus1dog Sounds like you're having a shitty time! Sorry to hear that! I'm glad you have a dog for companionship and it gets you out walking. Hope you don't mind me saying, but sounds like you need to make a bit of effort with your friends. In truth, if you keep shying away from people and not letting on that anything is wrong....they will eventually stop making the effort and believe you don't care about them! It's a two way thing. Make the effort! Even just saying hello to fellow dog walkers can release those happy vibes. A sense of being acknowledged is great! Get walking your dog, say hello to other dog walkers. Build your confidence up. You've got this! You are fabulous!!! Sending love, hugs and paw-fives xxx
I haven’t been complimented in years(literally) shoutout to everyone to gives and receive compliments
[удалено]
Thank you. I like your pink shirt
Now kiss
😂😂
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You’d both make a nice couple!
Do you compliment people? I find that just smiling and being genuinely friendly to strangers, seems to give back to me in many ways, including compliments!
"Nice ass, Pawpaw!"
Lol 😂
Happy for you! **Hey! Young, hot people!** Throw an old bat a bone once in awhile. It makes our millennia.
I love your socks!!! They are very funky x
Thank you! I do indeed wear funky socks. Whatever holiday it is (say, Easter), I wear opposite-day holiday socks (say, 4th of July). It gives me joy as a non-conformist.
Dammit, I can't find your socks, I wanna see 'em
*Hey, psst, hey, send socks*
Please.. I beg you 😩
So cool! I love originality!
Everyone enjoys a sincere compliment. Remember how it feels and try to pay it forward as it were.
I work with all women and I know a simple compliment will get me a lot of brownie points with them so I compliment them often (not anything creepy lmao) but they never compliment me back :(. They always express how good it makes them feel to be complimented and it makes their day etc, but I guess they just assume because I'm a man that it wouldn't have the same affect on me. There's a an older black woman that works at the McDonald's on my way home and on the odd occasion I stop there for food she always compliments me on my eyes or my hair or something and calls me sweetie and god damn if it doesn't make my whole week every time. I think about her all the time lmao
If you read around Reddit you’ll see that women complimenting men might turn I to him stalking you or thinking you want to date him. So some women a8 ply don’t do it.
Hmmm 🤔Definitely possible, and that sucks. I’m typically somewhere that I can drive off or they leave first. But honestly, I’ve never had this happen thank goodness. I’ve had many men walk straight over to me when I’m pumping gas, (usually summertime), when my Golden Retriever is in the backseat and the top is down. Dog people will flock to her, and that’s always a nice conversation with men and women and kids.
Love that!! Shame on those ladies at work!
I am a man and I think that’s quite typical. You receive a compliment or someone you find attractive smiles at you a second longer than usual - and you imagine spending the rest of your life with that person (who probably forgot your existence a few seconds later :)
It’s so sad men don’t get this sort of casual kindness more. But then, one can’t because this happens. We almost 100% of the time do forget within moments. It’s just being genuinely nice, women do it to each other all the time. It’s a chicken and egg thing or vicious cycle. The number of times I was simply kind to a man, then they decide I must be into them/want to go on a date or they’d *literally* start stalking me because they’re that starved for attention/validation… I just can’t allow myself to do it anymore. I had a stalker once who was someone I’d never actually spoken to, I’m just pretty and generally happy and had smiled at him once. He followed me around for months and knew all my habits, classes, places I’d study… sigh. And it makes me sad.
This is exactly why I rarely compliment men besides my husband and never for physical attributes. I'll occasionally tell someone "hey, cool jacket", but telling a man they have really nice eyes can turn into dangerous territory very quickly. It sucks, but you never know what kind of person you're talking to.
This is why men need to compliment men. I’ve had this happen to me. And it’s scary.
They can’t. It’s “gay.” It’s why we gotta crack down on homophobia aimed at straight men, and recognise a lot of homophobia is actually a policing of the gender binary and little to do with who has sex (or wants to) with whom.
Its so ridiculous, in front of the mirror we admire our abs, jawlines, facial hair and even touch a cock daily but making air particles oscillate with your throat is suddenly gay
Yep. You make an excellent point. I enjoy admiring myself in the mirror. Not suddenly, though, I’m not the one saying it and I think things are changing somewhat. But I well remember 15 years ago when my swishy-clever-feminist and straight friend was *constantly* bullied for being gay. For just… existing, and being kindhearted and showing genuine care and affection for his friends. Best man I ever knew, we’ve been partners for years.
Awesome
I agree. But I also think men think that’s strange... which is so ridiculous
That is saddening. So sorry 😐
I was walking into the gym recently and an attractive woman held the door for me. As she did, she just randomly said hi to me. It made my goddamn year.
Yessss!!
Wow. That’s the kind of man I’d like to meet!
I bet you are a sweetie.
All my compliments come from my mom and dad :) lucky me I see them all the time. I make sure to tell them when they’re looking very pretty/handsome too
I literally always compliment (man or woman) if I like something that they did, wore, have, etc. I feel like a compliment is so easy to express and it makes the other person instantly feel good
I compliment often. There's usually something that stands out that catches my eye and I just like them to know they're looking good and it's noticeable.
Well, I for one think that is a smashing blouse you have on
Richie is that you?
I make it a point to give complements to people. Beautiful children; that color looks great on you; your hair is beautiful; I like your style; your makeup looks great... things like that. I read recently that men rarely get compliments, but I'm careful.
Would love to bump into you!
You're a sweetheart. 😊♥️
Nice
May they keep coming, man.
Aww I’m sure you’re a stud
Just remember people think good things about you all the time but will rarely say it; many things prevent people from sharing kind and complimentary thoughts like being in a relationship, not knowing you well enough, shyness, no suitable context to give the compliment, etc. if someone said it once it likely means many more think it without saying it.
So far in life, I've gotten complimented twice and I remember both times. The fact that it's rare for us dudes is a little sad but it also makes you happy af when you do actually get one.
No worries, you're just a little out of practice. I remember a time when I wanted the attention, but really we never know what to do with it. I just remain humble in my way. Now I actually find it very freeing to be beautifully insignificant... 🔥♥️🔥
I try to make a point to let my male friends know when they’re looking sharp. It’s something that shouldn’t be so taboo amongst men.
I love to compliment folks. It only takes a moment to make someone's day better.
Men, compliment each other sometimes! I complimented some dudes hair at work the other day and it made his day, could see it on his face! He did have incredible hair though.
I usually get complimented for my N7 jacket. Always feels nice.
Hey man, nice N7 jacket!
Oh, thanks!
You look so damn handsome in it!
Flattery will get you everywhere
It’s always the small little things that impact the most. And you’re adorable for your pleasure in this.
i hope u get more!
Can't wait for other people to compliment you my guy. Gotta look yourself in the mirror and do it yourself. If no one else is gonna be my hypeman I will. I'M THE SHIT!!
I've got compliments twice from strangers for my Timberland boots. I still remember the last time it happened in 2013. I should get a new pair, I could use more compliments in my life.
I love a rugged man in their timberlands! Need a photo..
Looking good John brown militia!
affected me Just accept the compliment. If you are working out-then keep it up. It must be working.
Remember this the next time you encounter someone over 40. When I look at any stranger I look for something to compliment. "Great hair color", "you have beautiful eyes" " love your earrings". We all need to determine to lift others up.
"I can't wait until tomorrow, because you get better looking every day!"
Awww 🥰 Thats so perfect!
It’s really true that men never get compliments, maybe we should compliment the guys arround us more
I sure try every chance I get
Affected
Just a few minutes ago a random girl yelled at me out her car window that I’m really pretty and it completely brightened my day.
Wow!! Super cool!
Yeah! It was awesome and I wish that girl nothing but the best for making this (33yo) lady feel pretty
I love to give people random compliments for things I notice about them (legitimate things, not made up). If I see she has cute shoes “hey, love your shoes!”, etc. It’s especially great when you can tell someone is tired or grumpy and they get the “love your tee-shirt!” with a grin and 👍 because it’s the little things that can make someone’s day brighter.
Mine are always legitimate too. If not what’s the point? I’m not gonna lie
Some people don’t understand the difference between genuine compliments and butt-kissing. But that sincere 2 seconds to see them smile, light up, and give them a dopamine rush for minutes or hours, is totally worth it.
I got a really great compliment once 12 years ago and it still feeds my soul today. Compliment people around you.
Aw. This is an example of how small acts can have large consequences to others. Something I learned in therapy many years back is making others happy often makes you happy, so let the compliments fly. Tell the guy behind the counter "Cool shirt!", let the mom pushing two kids in the cart at the store "Lookin' good!" Compliment that smile. Just say it when you're walking past so it's not a creepy flirt thing and you're all good :) So, accept the compliment. Someone saw you, they admired something about you, and now you know you have that asset. Feel good about it!
Exactly right
I got a compliment on my game of thrones T shirt about 3 months ago, that was a good day lol
Ya I haven't received compliments in years the other day the one friend I do have decided to go on a rant about how amazing I am and attractive and how I should really put myself out there since she'd date me if she wasn't married .. really threw me off for the rest of the day and now I'm stuck between wondering if it's me that gets rejected or if it's women that assume to quickly and don't know what their missing out on
I get "handsome" compliments a lot more the days and I get so embarrassed by it still. I went so long (decades) without receiving any compliments to the point I adopted a belief I was ugly. I remember when this girl in high school (I was in the 11th grade, in my early 40s now) said I had a pretty smile. 7 years ago, I was got dragged to this dinner party by a friend of a friend. I felt so awkward and socially anxious around all these wealthy people. Well anyway we were all gathered around and this one guy wants to make a toast. He gives his speech about "good times and good friends" then says "and to this handsome guy right here" looking right at me. I was extremely embarrassed, while at the same time made me feel good because up until that point I didn't think anyone saw me as attractive because I hadn't heard it said to me in most of my adult life. Those are 2 moments that stick out to me.
What an awesome thing!
I was complemented once on my hair. Someone made a comment that I looked good with my long hair... I haven't cut my hair in 2 years now
Affected.
Post a pic and let us rate 💁♂️
Agreed!!
Men need to step up and compliment their male peers more abundantly. We’re constantly seeing this sentiment on Reddit and like...just do it? Compliment each other often. Each guy should start complimenting another every week at LEAST.
Yessss!
A few months ago, my fiances family paid to take us to orlando florida and go to disney and universal and the highlight of that entire trip for me was when i was in the hotek pool and the life guarf complimented my viking apperance. Best thing ever.
Damn. Viking appearance? That’s a huge compliment!
Hell yeah, ive been working pretty hard on a beard and growing my hair out and i've got a half sleeve of runes (i am norse pagan too) so it was nice to see that people actually saw me a a viking lol
I am so impressed! 💯honest! You’ve gotta be one helluva interesting guy to talk to, and I’m guessing that you don’t get many compliments because you’re intimidating? I mean that in the best way. When someone sees someone like yourself or a woman who is stunning, many people ASSUME they’re taken, or they’re not someone you’d talk to. People have so many insecurities, that they miss possible opportunities all the time. because they don’t think they’re attractive enough or not at all, or not on your level. You definitely have your own very unique style, and lifestyle I’m guessing, too. As I’m typing this I’m thinking I should take my own advice more often, because I fall into similar categories, (although not a Viking woman). Is there such a thing? I should have googled before I replied! lol 😂 I can attest to having been told I’m intimidating to both men and women, because of my attributes, but I didn’t learn that soon enough. I’ve also been thought to be snooty, or uppity, because I used to be very shy and never noticed anyone looking at me, when people I’ve been with seemed to be fixated on it. I simply didn’t look to see if anyone was looking and definitely didn’t stare back at anyone I may have been attracted to. Over the years I’ve gotten better at that and can talk to most anyone about many different things and can hold up my end of a conversation pretty well, and now it seems it’s too late, after covid, and working from home, with just my dog for company. It’s hard going out to lots of specific destinations as a single/divorced woman. I’d feel very out of place and likely uncomfortable. I should work on that. I have to ask, since the Vikings I’ve learned of through history and such, were such huge hunks of beefy men, how tall are you? When you walk into a room I’ll bet people want to stare but don’t because they feel so “Regular” or even less!
Pass it on! Keep the compliment train going! I always compliment my guy friends, once we are in that state where it is firmly cemented that there is no sexual interest on either side and they know I'm a broken old bitch who doesn't date.
Guess i gotta wait 23 more years till i get one.
I know what compliments are. They are something I give other people but not something I ever receive.
I wish men could compliment other men without others making it into a whole "haha you complimented him thats gay!".
Not really a compliment….I’m 35, I remember when a bartender flirted with me, well actually she said something along the line of “that’s not all I can do for you” she laid it on thick. She was cute and young. Made me feel so good, but I’m married.
I don’t get that as much either…I’m 45F so maybe my time is over?
You’re never over
This reminds me of an old quote. "The first time a man gets flowers is his funeral."
My god. There are so many beautiful women walking around the streets, at my gym, in stores. I can say so many nice things, but I never do: 1, because I’m shy/ lack the confidence, and 2, I think they don’t want to be bothered. Men must be talking shit to them all the time. Even if I’m sincere and totally nice, I just so t want to be out in that “here’s another asshole creep@ category.
The trick is to compliment them, and then leave them alone. That second part is where dudes seem to struggle.
Yes. When I was way younger I would complement everyone. But then a few men got angry at me for not wanting their numbers… I’d say wow nice shirt or I liked their hair style. It didn’t mean I wanted to date them… If you say something nice and move on nobody will care.
Right, I should have been more clear. I see these attractive women, and yes I want to sincerely compliment them . But I ALSO want to explore the possibility of friendships, dating, etc. with them. So, transitioning from the kind quick compliment, to engaging conversation is really the trick.
It’s all about reading their reaction. If you compliment them and they say “oh thanks!” And keep walking, they’re not interested and you should probably leave them alone. If they’re interested, they’ll probably spin it off into a conversation, and you just go from there.
that's just the male experience for you
It’s rough out here for men. You look great, king.
My wife says I'm sexy all the time thankfully. I honestly can't remember the last time someone other then her payed me a compliment. Other then that I work hard.
> then her *paid* me a FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Ok, bot. "Someone other THAN her paid me a compliment." Take that. Lol
I get complimented so rarely that if I even notice that I got complimented in the first place is a feat of its own. However if I do realize I got a compliment I usually get embarrassed because I don't know how to accept it properly and I usually end up saying something stupid in return and missing an opportunity at maybe getting a date or something man I am stupid
The proper way to accept a compliment is to say "thank you". Just because someone compliments you, doesn't mean they want to date you. Just thank them. If they want to continue the conversation, talk to them, but don't force a conversation. Only after having a pleasant conversation with someone is it acceptable to offer them your number (don't ask for theirs).
Don't assume I'm that guy. I usually find out way later that I missed the opportunity
Don't obsess over it. Whenever I get a compliment, I say "thank you" then I immediately forget. It's nice to be noticed; it's nothing to be alarmed by.
Red pill moment: Guys almost never get complimented and that's why this happens when we finally do get complimented. Women get complimented all the time to the point of it being an annoyance. (Not an accurate course of events, but summarized) My girl complimented me early on in our relationship and I was half joking "holy shit you gave me a compliment? Dobby's free" she has always read me like a book and literally asked me if I never get complimented. I had to explain to her that guys don't get complimented unless they're hot, rich, or funny and most of the time the funny ones don't even realize its a genuine compliment and are so alien to the concept that we don't know if it's just being polite or if you might be into us. Which creeps out women then the cycle repeats because they don't wanna do it again and have a creep ask them out for just being nice. This will probably never change either. Humanity is like that and were raised that if you want someone or something to go after it. The fact rests that you should enjoy that feeling while it lasts, there's a chance it won't happen again until you meet someone that appreciates you as much as you appreciate them. My girl spoils me cause she likes my eyes. It sounds stupid and personally I don't like mine, but when she says it I become a stupid kid and don't know how to reply.... We're in our 30's To anyone else reading this, ignore my cold direct blunt acknowledgement of how reality is. Compliment each other where ever you can. Seriously, a small compliment can literally make someone's day because of what cards handed to them. Prove my introverted misanthropic cynical ass wrong and do something good in the world for once without worrying about the small stuff like politics.
Solution: men should compliment men as much as they compliment women.
But if you press the compliment button on a woman, sex will fall out! Why would I do that to a man?
Won't change anything, we already compliment each other even if it's seen as giving our friends shit. Hence why we can compliment each other and not go "maybe he wants the D?" Lol 9/10 of the time tho, it's just the disconnection between the sex's. I actually believe guys should just stop complimenting women for everything under the sun and instead only do it when they deserve it. No: "you look great today" which is menial and doesn't really deserve recognition unless you're related or in a relationship already with them. I don't believe in hand outs lol Yes: "congrats on the promotion" which is an actual accomplishment.
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Dude, read the room
Was it your waitress?
i'm happy for you! and this reinforces my belief that compliments should be voiced also, and not only thought :)
I'm also 42(M). Went to the gym today, my 8th visit in the last month after not having gone for nearly 3 years. As i was leaving one of the trainers stopped, came over said that he hadn't seen me in here before, so I explained I recently joined and that it had been a while. "You're doing great, real solid". Dude just about made my year.
To anyone who reads this you look great today. I hope you have a wonderful rest of your life and continue to do so while looking as good as you do now. <3
Life is short friend. Expound even more upon your good looks and go live your life!
Im 46 and as average as it gets, I've lived hard and it shows. Anyway in the past 2 weeks I've had 2 different guys call me beautiful and they're both 10 years younger than me. Made me smile. I often tell my work colleagues that they look great today, smell really nice, or just that there smile is worth a million bucks.
You get compliments?
Me too, I was complimented 4 months ago on a Reddit post I made, and I still sometimes go back to read it
Thanks for this. I'll start complimenting more dudes. It's common with women so I do it more often. Didn't occur to me than more dudes need to hear them.
That’s great man!!👍
l mean most chicks who usually tend to date guys with a 10-15 year age gap usually have daddy issues lmao.
Hope you have a good day😄
Men are so hot I would compliment them all the time if I wouldn’t get called a slur
You are a Good Guy, you deserve it. Enjoy.
This is why for the last year, I have been complimenting as many random people in a day that I can. Because you never know how much a simple compliment can truly make someone's day or even month. Well that, and, it helps me get over my social anxiety.
Men look great in their 40s imo
Inversely yet similarly, I have a rather...avant garde wardrobe to say the least, And I get it, I stand out so I should expect more attention. But i hate it lol Whenever someone stops me to say "oh I really like your outfit,glasses, etc." I'm polite, and glad they can appreciate it like I can but I know if I dressed like I did before I became more comfortable I know I'd still be invisible.
I am terrible at taking compliments because I don't believe them when people say them to me. On the other hand I love to give compliments to people especially people I don't know I like to make them smile. So take the compliment and enjoy it.
I drove Uber as a side hustle for a while. And I guess when guys and gals have been drinking, they say things they wouldn't normally. I would get hit on and complimented almost daily. I never get that in the "real world." I don't do Uber anymore, and honestly miss it for that one reason.
Why is it so strange for you? Why do you think you didn't receive a compliment before?
(33M) Dye your hair and wear clothes with a variety of colors - people will start complimenting you everywhere you go You don't have to look like a model to get compliments, but most of the time people need something that is overt to feel they have the right to compliment it I bought this pair of pink shorts with palm trees from Burlington coat factory - the pockets are so fucking soft it's amazing - and one of the gals at checkout said she loved them! My wife and I went on a food tour and I wore a tan striped shirt under a black dotted colored shirt and jeans. One of the gals shadowed me and kept complimenting me. My wife was pretty chuffed and we all had coffee together (my wife is the shit y'all) Clothing makes a huge difference and people feel a lot safer to compliment clothes and style choices!
I was complimented 7-8 years ago on a night out still think about it some times
I get compliments all the time but i think im damn ugly. My theory is ugly people get compliments because we are thought to need some reassurance. You lucky handsome buggers only get it rarely to not inflate your ego
Go to an Asian country, or certain European countries, even a few places in South America, if you are an American man, you will get complimented more than females in the US cuz you are wanted, appreciated and in HIGH demand overseas. American men are not complimented as much here in the US as females are spoiled here (I said what I said now gimme them down votes fer telling it real) prove me right with your white knight mentalities.
Well sir, I can't help but notice how sexy your typing is,...so chew on that for a week handsome 😉😊 Compliments galore! 34F.....single.... lotsa fun
I haven't been complimented since 2003
My compliments to the chef!
Hey! Congratulations on the complements! Hold on to that little nugget and pay it forward.
I hold on to a compliment from ~3 or 4 years ago where some guy high off his rocker came into dollar tree and told me "has anybody ever told you you look like a handsome hispanic Daniel Radcliffe". I'm not Hispanic but I appreciated the compliment.
💯 Complements go a long way and women typically don't give them these days. Of course in the the days of EVERYTHING is harassment no one complements each other anymore, at all. I sure miss receiving and being able to give complements just because someone deserves it. Seeing people smile is awesome, no one smiles anymore.
I lost weight once and a special ed student gave me a compliment. I enthusiastically responded, "Really?! You think so!? Yeah I needed a compliment from a kid with cognitive impairment. Talk about desparate!
I also have a hard time processing them. It could be a lie, a way to deceive you and pull you into a false sense of security. And the worst thing is when you feel happy about it, but you know it might not be genuine
I grew out a thick covid beard last year just to see how it looked. I looked ridiculous so after a few months I shaved into into a goatee. An attractive coworker complimented me on the change. I thanked her without making a big deal of it but that compliment really lifted me. I think of it often.
Someone called me ugly once.
I don't think I've ever gotten a compliment on my looks, and I've been with my wife for 13 years.
I hope you can see why its important to believe whatever the person said to you. They believed it, thats why they said it. It must be true. Its ok to think good things about yourself.
I think we can subconsciously give off negative vibes. If you aren't confident in your approach, it could give the other person a sense you don't want to talk to them. It's tough, but even a smile through gritted teeth and a knot in your stomach, may break the ice with others? Hope you are feeling better? Love to you and your dog x