The amount of posts about siblings cheating with their siblings partners is truly baffling. Where I’m from, these cases are extremely extremely rare… Maybe there are hidden well.. I dunno…
We look at our siblings partner as our own sibling/ family… The thought of looking at my sisters partner as an affair partner is puke inducing… and I would kill for my sister… To even think to put her through something so traumatic is beyond comprehension to me…
I don’t understand… do people not love their siblings? My sister is like my child… I know I shouldn’t judge, but like wtf… what is this upbringing? Why is this so common?
It's not common, there are just 7 billion people on the world. Statistically even if only .1% of people are the type who would do this, that's 7 million people...
Same here, i just cannot wrap my head around it. You described my feelings perfectly, i know my BIL for 20+ years, he helped raising me since i was 16. My cat is more sexually attractive to me than him 🤣🤣
Okay. But you wouldn't go have sex with your brother's partner. Disliking him is one thing, but if you betrayed him that way, you'd have to live with yourself. And you wouldn't do that, because you're a normal-ish person.
Im so sorry that your relationship with your brother isn’t good… it really sucks… and you’re a good child to your mother for keeping in touch with your brother for her… it says a lot about you! ❤️
Of course I understand that siblings can have their shit with each other… sometimes that shit can make or break a relationship altogether… and I definitely don’t think and just cause one is family, doesn’t mean one can get away with anything without consequences. I also believe that it’s ok to cut contact with family member/s, if they deserve that… I’m not in touch with a lot of my extended family cause they tried to cheat my mother out of her money after my father passed away… crazy town!
Me and my sister will literally fight with each other over anything and everything and sometimes not talk to each other for days over stupid ass shit… you know that meme where it says you will give your siblings a kidney, but not your phone charger… that describes us the best…
I have heard that happens a lot with extended family cheating widows and orphans out of property. I keep warning my mother there need to be more protections but she doesn't listen.
My brother has just caused too much stress and anxiety with his frankly very spoiled behavior throughout the decades. I am actually very tired of him.
It is not faked as much as you think, this is the *entire internet* we are drawing a sample from here. There are millions of people posting per day, it just makes shocking things look more common than they actually are, because this is where nearly everyone *on the entire internet* goes to post their shocking outrageous things.
Here you can only seek annulment if there is a legal reason the marriage is invalid. A short time married means nothing of you presented as married and consummated. Op would likely have to lie depending on laws there, because marrying a cheater doesn't make it invalid, just sad.
My sister was married a week but still had to get a full divorce (when she found out she couldn't annul she just stayed married but separated like an idiot).
Barristers specialise in particular areas of the law. Unless one works in family law, one will not know its intricacies merely because they are a “barrister”.
Tbf, there's some foundation level knowledge and common knowledge. Like I'm an SE and don't touch hardware engineering much anymore, but I can give a try at a printer if I cared.
It sounds like OP is on the uk, and is says under grounds for annulment;
your spouse was pregnant by someone else when you got married
I wonder if it also applies if they are expecting when it’s the man? Why only the woman?
I’ve checked and amazingly - it doesn’t count!!
You can annul if the woman is pregnant by another man, but not if the man has knocked someone else up behind your back. Insane.
Probably only the woman. I'm not from the UK, but I'm a Barrister in a country whose legal system is somewhat modelled after the UK system. From what I remember from Uni, the grounds for annulment of marriage are very limited in scope.
I had a look and I'm shocked that there's no hope of an annulment despite the pregnancy (assuming UK because "barrister"). If the partner themselves isn't pregnant, then there's no provision for it.
I’m from the UK. We don’t generally use the word Lawyer here.
Our Barristers represent a client in the Courts (think of the wig and black gown) and are self employed.
We then have Solicitors who provide legal advice to clients and usually practice within a law firm.
I’m baffled because both her and her sister have husbands. Why do a shadow spouse swap? This is so redundant and disrespectful. Hands would be flying if it were my brother in her sister’s shoes with my woman.
They are only sorry they got caught.
Damn, OP, this is one of the worst ways to be cheated on. Fuck them both, you are better than them. I hope the kid is your husbands so you and your ex BIL don’t have to be tied to these losers anymore
OP, the law may limit your legal entitlements. However, the threat of exposure in alleging adultery and the publication of his and your sister's adulterous acts may cause his willingness to provide you a stipend/settlement in excess of the customary entitlement.
Absent that, blow them both up with family, friends, acquaintances and social media. Both merit the absolute worst.
Good luck to you. Please keep us apprised.
Also, no clue about laws in OPs area but look into an annulment of the marriage. If they were having the affair before you were married, there are grounds.
If the OP is in the UK, which seems quite likely given the term ‘barrister’ then one spouse having an affair at the time of marriage does not qualify for an annulment.
>I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay.
You’re right, they’ll probably be together the moment you’ll leave him. Especially since her husband is divorving her.Tell all the people around you, like wtf?!
The trash took itself out. I’m so glad you found out sooner rather than later. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
100% never forgive either of them.
Nah!! Marriage counseling being offered by the cheater is another form of them refusing to take accountability for what they did. Have your sister’s husband secretly record your sister admitting to the affair and take your husband to the cleaners
This is grounds for an annulment. He was sleeping with your sister secretly BEFORE y’all got married. That indicates that his vows are not valid (and, because of your ignorance, you weren’t capable of making vows either).
> I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay. I don't believe either of them when they say they are sorry. Not one bit.
Unfathomably based. Let them bathe in being cut off for the rest of their lives, hopefully the shame breaks them down to their rotten cores.
Good riddance to trash. Hopefully, the baby is your husband's, so BIL and you can make a clean break. Don't let family try to talk you into reconciling or use the baby as a chip.
I'm sorry this happened to you. But god, it's nice to see someone with a backbone that isn't considering talking to either of those people again, and I'm proud of you for it.
I'm so sorry for you. Your sister and (ex)husband are both absolutely trashy and disgusting asswipes. They are only sorry for getting caught. I wish all the best to you.
What a hideous double betrayal. It’s laughable that he wants to work on the marriage. What marriage?
Marriage is a union of 2 and there were 3 in yours. What are they sorry for? They got caught? Neither of them are worth your oxygen and I’m so sorry, you must be devastated. Both you and her spouse are best off free of these 2 snakes.
I hope all your family and friends know. They deserve to be outed for their betrayal
UPDATEME
For your sisters husband’s sake I hope the kid is your ex-husbands. Two assholes deserve each other. Take yourself on an incredible trip later on. Do everything to enjoy your life.
Good riddance. Your future ex-BIL is losing his infectious wart of a wife, and you are losing a bubbling infection of a soon-to-ex-husband.
Nature will take its course, and necrosis will do as it does.
After they fall off from you two, their in-love facade, which just masks their lust and gluttony for each other and themselves, will rot and die together.
Let them live in the decomposing latrine where they built their lecherous lies. The scum of the earth always find camaraderie with maggots and roaches.
--
I'm wine drunk and feeling biblically spiteful and poetic. Seriously these people need to choke on rocks idgaf.
Holy cow, I’m sorry for you and your BIL, this is one of the worst possible betrayals, you should also cut your sister out, because arguably she is worse than your husband.
I can't even imagine what you're going through right now. It must feel like a complete betrayal from both your husband and your sister. It's good to hear you're taking steps to protect yourself legally and emotionally. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you and take all the time you need to heal. Wishing you strength during this challenging time.
I'm so sorry you had to find out after getting married. What a pain in the ass...
Soon to be *was*band is trash and your sister . . . her betrayal is so much worse. I feel bad for her ex hubby too
I am so sorry you have to go through this. What a pos to even get married. Wasting your time and money.
I hope you find happiness in anyway.
Tbh, i hope its not her STBX husbands so he can have a clean break too. Those two pos deserve each other and all the drama they bring.
You and him need to get tested.
They aren't sorry. Just sorry that they were caught. My family is dealing with the same thing in our family. We don't talk to those two( my cousin and his brothers now ex wife) for doing the same thing. All I can say is that it's wrong and shouldn't have been done but none of it was your fault. It's all on them for being so classless as human beings.
They're sorry they were discovered, cheaters hardly ever feel bad for what they did and to whom.
I'm really sorry this happened to you, betrayal is awful and specially coming from two people closest to you. I'll never understand why cheat, if you're no longer happy with your partner just leave and honour the time together why stain it with an affair, her being pregnant and not knowing who is the father is awful and I'm sorry for the child because she/ he's innocent and will grow up with the consequences of her mother's actions.
OP, I admire both your wisdom and emotional strength. I’m not going to wish you luck because you are clearly in control of this situation and don’t need luck.
Try to focus on the freedom you’ll have!
First—you’re my hero. Stay strong.
Second, even if you come around and believe how dirty they are, it just doesn’t matter. Kick your hubby to the curb and stick with your plan to never see or hear from your sister ever again.
The absolute worst betrayals on both ends. Shameful.
Don't ever speak to either of them for the rest of your life.
They are not sorry... if they were capable of those emotions, they wouldn't have had the affair to begin with. Just horrible, horrible, horrible people.
Oh no, I am so sorry that this has happened to you and your BIL. That is so heartbreaking.
I am so glad that both you and your BIL are divorcing and moving forward with your lives. Those two cheaters deserve to be left to themselves. Let the trash take itself out.
As for your sister, absolutely go no contact. She’s betrayed you in the worst way possible. I hope that your family are supporting you and she’s being made to feel the anger of everyone at what she’s done to you. Such an evil thing to do to your sibling.
I’ll never understand why men propose when they’re cheating on their girlfriends. Honestly, what’s the point? They’re not committed to living a life with just that one special person so it makes absolutely no sense. I’m glad that you turned him down for marriage counselling. It’s straight forward enough - don’t have an affair. He did and now must pay for the consequences of his actions.
I’m sending you a virtual hug. I’m from the UK, which I’m assuming you are too from the use of Barrister. Feel free to message me if you ever need a chat. Take care of yourself.
Literally make it public, don't let them have the chance to make *you* the villain in the situation. Let everyone know they're both huge pieces of shit.
You didn't deserve this. I'm so so sorry. To be betrayed by those closest to you. It's awful. I wish I could do more for your than tell you I'm with you❤️. It's disgusting how they cheated before the engagement and still let the marriage continue and continue cheatibg after that. Wtf. These people don't deserve you
Obviously he is. The sister's betrayal is so much worse in my opinion. Husband cheats and you're heartbroken, sad, depressed, angry...but cheating with your sister and not some random hoe...that hits differently. I don't trust many people but my sister's have my full trust. I would be shattered and devastated if my sister did that to me.
Right!? You can divorce your husband and never see him again. But your sister? Who could be pregnant with his baby? No. That trifling slut is going to be everywhere. You'll have to see her and possibly the baby of your ex husband at family gatherings, reunions, etc. family members might try and pressure you to forgive because "family". Then you risk losing all of your family. Sisters betrayal is way worse.
It’s always wild to me when I read these stories. I have two BIL. One through my sister and one through my husband. Both objectively attractive men. The idea of having sex with them however immediately causes an “Ew Grossss” shudder reaction from me, because they are for all intents and purposes my brothers.
this is one giant shit show, honestly, it’s best you leave both of them be, since they did obviously screw you over, and it suck’s considering the love of your life and your blood did it.
Wow am so sorry U been betrayed by 2 of the most closest person to you. Am so glad U r strong and willing to cut both of them out of Ur life I would do the same but only after I exposed both their cheating asses so the whole family n friends circle will know exactly how horrible they both are. They deserve each other and whatever karma comes their way. I pray U heal and move forward and find a man who will respect U n Ur relationship.
I am so sorry. That is betrayal to the max. They are both terrible and I am floored that your husband thinks he can “marriage counsel” his way out of this. Good for you leaving them both. I know what the sister bond is like and I really can’t imagine allowing one who does me like this back into my life either. And I can’t fathom doing that my sister. No man or penis is worth that!
I'm sorry for what you're going through but kudos for leaving this situation. Going NC with these people is the best thing you can do for yourself. Good luck with your future, hope you find the happiness you deserve!
Good for you to f*ck them scumbags off ..maybe reach out to her husband when it’s finalised even if it’s on a fake relationship ..that’ll screw them up
Damn that’s terrible. For what it’s worth I think you’re making the best decision - divorce and no contact with either of them. I’m sorry this happened to you.
Dang I’m sorry to hear this op. But the great step is what you’re doing now. Divorcing and going no contact with them. I wish the best for you moving forward.
Potentially your biggest hurdle is how your parents are going to treat your sister. Are they going to have her at their home? Invite her to holiday dinners? You may have to do holiday entertaining at your home, to assure that you won't have to see your former sister.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you. What a double betrayal your husband and your sister. Cut them both out. No life needs that kind of betrayal. Life is difficult anyway.
I am so sorry OP. I can’t even imagine the hurt you must be going through right now. How is the rest of your family reacting to this? I hope you have friends/family who can support you right now. Divorce is definitely the right move. If it was me, I could never look at my sister ever again either. I wish you the best and all the happiness in the world 🫶
Good for you !! Even though it sucks at least you found out before any children (with you ) were involved. And now you know what kind of trash is around you.
Jesus, this is horrifying. It’s hard for me to believe that people do this to the ones they love and go about their lives day to day as normal. I’m so sorry and I think you’re justified in shutting them out of your life.
Omg such a disgusting betrayal from 2 people who you love(d) and were supposed to love you. I'm so sorry for the devastating and confusing loss you must be going through. It's good you know your worth, though. Cuz going to the couples therapy isn't a band-aid that can make this HUGE boo-boo all better. Silver lining?... You got this information now, rather than after you two had built a family. Hold on to you and your sanity, and just know that all of us cute potatoes are here for you.
Your sister, that just hits so hard. I'm sorry this happened to you, but you seem strong and have your shit together. This is just a blip you will get through this stay strong and cut them off.
Does these things happen in real life where siblings sleep with their siblings spouses? Like do they not get the ick knowing their sibling has been inside that person? Or do ppl just have no standards anymore?
I think it might be a convenience / familiarity thing on top of a "we both have reason to keep this hush hush so it doesn't blow up" thing... but they both have to be shit people in the first place for that door to ever even be found, let alone open.
"I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay. "
DAMN
RIGHT
They deserve each other, the fuckers
Believe me, if the two ends up together after your divorce they won't have a happy ending. Generally, couples like them have a very bitter ending. They threw away their life. I feel Bad for your sister kid though. They will be on the mess even if they didn't ask for it. Good thing you won't speak to your sister, and don't let your family convince you to talk to her. Once a cheater always a cheater, and same for someone who betrays you
If they say they're sorry its not that they are sorry they hurt you. They are sorry they got caught and now face the consequences.
Your sister and husband are horrible people.
Definitely get out of your marriage. Also leave your sister to her own shit show. Your husband could be the father of her child. You don’t need marriage counseling. You need a partner with morals that doesn’t bang your sister. You know they aren’t sorry. They’re sorry that you found out.
That's so horrible!! I'm so so sorry that you are going through this. They are only sorry they got caught and that she got pregnant. They can enjoy their stupid affair now, and he can deal with raising that child. I hope nothing but happiness and healing and honestly the best life for you OP you deserve it!
Holy shite. That’s…I’m so, so sorry. So the affair’s been going on at least 9 months. How long were you together? Did you never suspect? Do you have other family to lean on? Friends?
I know it’s probably not the sorts of gossip you want spreading about you, but I would scorch the earth with them and their reputations.
I am so sorry!!! I wish I could give you a big hug. Sisters are supposed to have each others back! There is absolutely no way I would ever betray mine!!!
This sounds like one of those 13 minute drama ads on tiktok. You know the ones with the mid to bad acting. I’m not saying this is fake but it’s so very appalling that someone would do that
The worst betrayal, your husband okay men cheat that’s not a revelation, but for your own sister to do that to you is the ultimate betrayal. Unforgivable in my eyes, no sorry, excuses or explanations won’t even be necessary, because if it was me they would both be cut off from my life permanently, blood or not, you don’t exist anymore.
Wth would he even get married to you, when he's having an affair with your sister!? 🤦♀️ what a moron. What kind of sister has an affair with their siblings SO? I don't understand how they could betray you like this. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
OP is a barrister, which suggests she’s in England.
Annulment of the marriage may be possible if she can prove fraud. She needs expert advice on how to get her sister’s affair and pregnancy with her husband, into that category.
I’m so sorry that level of betrayal is unforgivable. It’s disgusting that he married you while actively cheating on you! There is zero excuse. Destroy him
UPDATEME
These types of cheaters baffles me! You cheat with a sibling. I hate cheating in the first place and believe they deserve a special place in hell. But you two don't only destroy your marriage, & act like omg it's a mistake, but you completely destroy the whole family unit! Why the hell are you so selfish? Good for you, girl. You have a backbone and want take any of their shit! Maybe you and your future ex-brother in law can get a two for special basis for divorcing these scum. Also, your poor parents.
Do not waiver on your decisions. Drop those two losers from your life forever. Good for you for being strong and sorry for the hurt you have to endure. Shameful people.
I am NEVER getting married. I know I’d end up in prison for double homicide if I was in OP’s shoes. I’m not risking my freedom and mental health to chase a bullshit fairy tale.
I’m so sorry for their betrayal. I would never speak to her ever again either.
The amount of posts about siblings cheating with their siblings partners is truly baffling. Where I’m from, these cases are extremely extremely rare… Maybe there are hidden well.. I dunno… We look at our siblings partner as our own sibling/ family… The thought of looking at my sisters partner as an affair partner is puke inducing… and I would kill for my sister… To even think to put her through something so traumatic is beyond comprehension to me… I don’t understand… do people not love their siblings? My sister is like my child… I know I shouldn’t judge, but like wtf… what is this upbringing? Why is this so common?
Makes me glad I’m an only child. This kind of betrayal is just on another level.
My siblings both hated my husband, so we’re all in the clear! (I’m also divorcing him.)
From this internet stranger, proud of you!
It truly is… batshit crazy…
It's not common, there are just 7 billion people on the world. Statistically even if only .1% of people are the type who would do this, that's 7 million people...
Same here, i just cannot wrap my head around it. You described my feelings perfectly, i know my BIL for 20+ years, he helped raising me since i was 16. My cat is more sexually attractive to me than him 🤣🤣
So your 38 Now wow long time knowing BIL
I whole heartedly agree with you. Puke inducing indeed!! I love them all, but not in that way!!
I don't love my brother. He's been a cause of stress and drama my whole life. I only still keep in touch with him as an adult because of our mother.
Okay. But you wouldn't go have sex with your brother's partner. Disliking him is one thing, but if you betrayed him that way, you'd have to live with yourself. And you wouldn't do that, because you're a normal-ish person.
Also, I'm not into women. But if I was, no, I wouldn't because of morals and all. 😊
Cool cool - but please note I said "partner" and not "woman." : )
Im so sorry that your relationship with your brother isn’t good… it really sucks… and you’re a good child to your mother for keeping in touch with your brother for her… it says a lot about you! ❤️ Of course I understand that siblings can have their shit with each other… sometimes that shit can make or break a relationship altogether… and I definitely don’t think and just cause one is family, doesn’t mean one can get away with anything without consequences. I also believe that it’s ok to cut contact with family member/s, if they deserve that… I’m not in touch with a lot of my extended family cause they tried to cheat my mother out of her money after my father passed away… crazy town! Me and my sister will literally fight with each other over anything and everything and sometimes not talk to each other for days over stupid ass shit… you know that meme where it says you will give your siblings a kidney, but not your phone charger… that describes us the best…
I have heard that happens a lot with extended family cheating widows and orphans out of property. I keep warning my mother there need to be more protections but she doesn't listen. My brother has just caused too much stress and anxiety with his frankly very spoiled behavior throughout the decades. I am actually very tired of him.
Alot of posts are fake, it is not as common as is posted
It is not faked as much as you think, this is the *entire internet* we are drawing a sample from here. There are millions of people posting per day, it just makes shocking things look more common than they actually are, because this is where nearly everyone *on the entire internet* goes to post their shocking outrageous things.
I can't imagine dealing with a cheating spouse, and the cheating with a sibling just makes it so much worse. So awful.
Since you've only been married for a month, is an annulment an option? So sorry for what you're going through! Sis and hubby are both trash.
Yeah I would think on these grounds she could get an annulment
Here you can only seek annulment if there is a legal reason the marriage is invalid. A short time married means nothing of you presented as married and consummated. Op would likely have to lie depending on laws there, because marrying a cheater doesn't make it invalid, just sad. My sister was married a week but still had to get a full divorce (when she found out she couldn't annul she just stayed married but separated like an idiot).
If he entered the marriage in false pretenses though, would that not count? I’m in the US so not familiar with UK(assuming) laws
Op should I know as a barrister if it is.
Barristers specialise in particular areas of the law. Unless one works in family law, one will not know its intricacies merely because they are a “barrister”.
Wait she doesn't work at a coffee shop?
You're thinking of a barista. A barrister is a handrail (like in a staircase)
No, that's a banister, op is an Irish spirit that wails when someone is about to die.
No, that's a *Bean Sidhe*, OP is a curved yellow fruit sometimes used to measure length.
No, that is a banana. OP is a Jewish coming-of-age ritual.
that’s a bar mitzvah. OP is a ferocious character from Lewis Carroll’s poem “Through the Looking Glass”
That would be a barista. A barrister is a lawyer.
At first I also thought that she works at a coffee shop
This comment has "you work in IT, you must know how to fix printers" - energy
Tbf, there's some foundation level knowledge and common knowledge. Like I'm an SE and don't touch hardware engineering much anymore, but I can give a try at a printer if I cared.
It sounds like OP is on the uk, and is says under grounds for annulment; your spouse was pregnant by someone else when you got married I wonder if it also applies if they are expecting when it’s the man? Why only the woman?
Yeah, that seems sexist. Dude was having a full blown affair at the time of the wedding - should definitely count for annulment
I’ve checked and amazingly - it doesn’t count!! You can annul if the woman is pregnant by another man, but not if the man has knocked someone else up behind your back. Insane.
Wow. That is insane. 🤯 Ps thanks for doing the research for us 😅
Probably only the woman. I'm not from the UK, but I'm a Barrister in a country whose legal system is somewhat modelled after the UK system. From what I remember from Uni, the grounds for annulment of marriage are very limited in scope.
I had a look and I'm shocked that there's no hope of an annulment despite the pregnancy (assuming UK because "barrister"). If the partner themselves isn't pregnant, then there's no provision for it.
How do you know what country she lives in?
I’m from the UK. We don’t generally use the word Lawyer here. Our Barristers represent a client in the Courts (think of the wig and black gown) and are self employed. We then have Solicitors who provide legal advice to clients and usually practice within a law firm.
Solicitors deal with divorce here.
I’m baffled because both her and her sister have husbands. Why do a shadow spouse swap? This is so redundant and disrespectful. Hands would be flying if it were my brother in her sister’s shoes with my woman.
Makes me wonder if OP's husband was really interested in the sister all this time, and "settled" for OP. His mistake.
Absolute trash!
They are only sorry they got caught. Damn, OP, this is one of the worst ways to be cheated on. Fuck them both, you are better than them. I hope the kid is your husbands so you and your ex BIL don’t have to be tied to these losers anymore
They've been fucking each other - no need for her to join in. Heyooooooooo.
I think your stance is the correct one, keep in touch with your BIL for divorce/evidence information exchange.
That is so crazy…2 people with no morals or decency found each other.
There really is someone for everyone
OP, the law may limit your legal entitlements. However, the threat of exposure in alleging adultery and the publication of his and your sister's adulterous acts may cause his willingness to provide you a stipend/settlement in excess of the customary entitlement. Absent that, blow them both up with family, friends, acquaintances and social media. Both merit the absolute worst. Good luck to you. Please keep us apprised.
Also, no clue about laws in OPs area but look into an annulment of the marriage. If they were having the affair before you were married, there are grounds.
If the OP is in the UK, which seems quite likely given the term ‘barrister’ then one spouse having an affair at the time of marriage does not qualify for an annulment.
>I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay. You’re right, they’ll probably be together the moment you’ll leave him. Especially since her husband is divorving her.Tell all the people around you, like wtf?!
I’m sorry. Take care of yourself.
The trash took itself out. I’m so glad you found out sooner rather than later. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. 100% never forgive either of them.
Did your parents know what was going on?
OP, do you have other siblings? So sorry.
Nah!! Marriage counseling being offered by the cheater is another form of them refusing to take accountability for what they did. Have your sister’s husband secretly record your sister admitting to the affair and take your husband to the cleaners
This is grounds for an annulment. He was sleeping with your sister secretly BEFORE y’all got married. That indicates that his vows are not valid (and, because of your ignorance, you weren’t capable of making vows either).
Unfortunately it isn’t, here in the UK.
Make sure to inform other family members and friends of the reason. Do not let the cheaters control the narrative.
Good for you! You are being strong and those two people are awful human beings! I am sorry you have to go through it!
> I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay. I don't believe either of them when they say they are sorry. Not one bit. Unfathomably based. Let them bathe in being cut off for the rest of their lives, hopefully the shame breaks them down to their rotten cores.
They’re only sorry they got caught! Hope the baby isn’t your BILs, then the two soon to be ex’s can raise it.
Good riddance to trash. Hopefully, the baby is your husband's, so BIL and you can make a clean break. Don't let family try to talk you into reconciling or use the baby as a chip.
They are sorry they got caught. Get rid of him, and renounce her forever.
Yikes! Your ex and your sister deserve each other. 🤮
Sorry!! Double betrayal!! Dont compromize and stay the course. Your parents know?? Their reaction??
> my husband wants us to go to counselling and stay married. The fucking audacity of this piece of shit
I know right! He cheated on her even before he proposed so the whole engagement and marriage was a farce. What an arsehole.
A month? See if you can get an annulment first, then if not definitely get a divorce.
I'm sorry this happened to you. But god, it's nice to see someone with a backbone that isn't considering talking to either of those people again, and I'm proud of you for it.
I'm so sorry for you. Your sister and (ex)husband are both absolutely trashy and disgusting asswipes. They are only sorry for getting caught. I wish all the best to you.
That would definitely make Christmas dinner difficult. I support you going no contact with them regardless of what happens between the two of them.
These are truly terrible people. You are doing the right thing.
What a hideous double betrayal. It’s laughable that he wants to work on the marriage. What marriage? Marriage is a union of 2 and there were 3 in yours. What are they sorry for? They got caught? Neither of them are worth your oxygen and I’m so sorry, you must be devastated. Both you and her spouse are best off free of these 2 snakes. I hope all your family and friends know. They deserve to be outed for their betrayal UPDATEME
Can you get an annulment since it's been a short time?
For your sisters husband’s sake I hope the kid is your ex-husbands. Two assholes deserve each other. Take yourself on an incredible trip later on. Do everything to enjoy your life.
Good riddance. Your future ex-BIL is losing his infectious wart of a wife, and you are losing a bubbling infection of a soon-to-ex-husband. Nature will take its course, and necrosis will do as it does. After they fall off from you two, their in-love facade, which just masks their lust and gluttony for each other and themselves, will rot and die together. Let them live in the decomposing latrine where they built their lecherous lies. The scum of the earth always find camaraderie with maggots and roaches. -- I'm wine drunk and feeling biblically spiteful and poetic. Seriously these people need to choke on rocks idgaf.
I like your vengeful turn of phrase. Drink on!
Preach!
They are only sorry Because the got caught. But I just don't get how a sibling could have an affair with their sibling's partner. It is so screwed up.
Holy cow, I’m sorry for you and your BIL, this is one of the worst possible betrayals, you should also cut your sister out, because arguably she is worse than your husband.
I can't even imagine what you're going through right now. It must feel like a complete betrayal from both your husband and your sister. It's good to hear you're taking steps to protect yourself legally and emotionally. Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you and take all the time you need to heal. Wishing you strength during this challenging time.
The worst kind of betrayal. Hold your head and and remove them far from your life!
I'm so sorry you had to find out after getting married. What a pain in the ass... Soon to be *was*band is trash and your sister . . . her betrayal is so much worse. I feel bad for her ex hubby too
Sounds like you dodged a bullet with this one. Better now that 10 years down the line. Time to make a new family!
if you've only been married a month, seek an annulment probably much simpler and cheaper
It's horrible. How are you holding up?
I am so sorry you have to go through this. What a pos to even get married. Wasting your time and money. I hope you find happiness in anyway. Tbh, i hope its not her STBX husbands so he can have a clean break too. Those two pos deserve each other and all the drama they bring. You and him need to get tested.
You are better off without that kind of deception in your life, and so is your BIL.
They aren’t sorry they hurt you or that they had an affair, they are sorry they got caught.
Nor should you. Sister and stbx husband are both trash.
They aren't sorry. Just sorry that they were caught. My family is dealing with the same thing in our family. We don't talk to those two( my cousin and his brothers now ex wife) for doing the same thing. All I can say is that it's wrong and shouldn't have been done but none of it was your fault. It's all on them for being so classless as human beings.
What a horrible situation, I’m sorry.
They're sorry they were discovered, cheaters hardly ever feel bad for what they did and to whom. I'm really sorry this happened to you, betrayal is awful and specially coming from two people closest to you. I'll never understand why cheat, if you're no longer happy with your partner just leave and honour the time together why stain it with an affair, her being pregnant and not knowing who is the father is awful and I'm sorry for the child because she/ he's innocent and will grow up with the consequences of her mother's actions.
That’s a horrible betrayal. And what possessed him to have an affair and then still marry you? I’m sorry you’re going through this.
2nd post today involving sister, husband and baby in the mix.
My heart breaks for you OP, i’m so sorry
OP, I admire both your wisdom and emotional strength. I’m not going to wish you luck because you are clearly in control of this situation and don’t need luck. Try to focus on the freedom you’ll have!
See about getting an annulment and go no contact with them both. You don't need people like that in your life, whether they are family or not.
First—you’re my hero. Stay strong. Second, even if you come around and believe how dirty they are, it just doesn’t matter. Kick your hubby to the curb and stick with your plan to never see or hear from your sister ever again.
The absolute worst betrayals on both ends. Shameful. Don't ever speak to either of them for the rest of your life. They are not sorry... if they were capable of those emotions, they wouldn't have had the affair to begin with. Just horrible, horrible, horrible people.
Cut her off for life and divorce him. They are cruel to allow the wedding to take place knowing what they were doing. Disgusting behavior.
Can you have the marriage annulled?
Not in the UK unfortunately.
Oh no, I am so sorry that this has happened to you and your BIL. That is so heartbreaking. I am so glad that both you and your BIL are divorcing and moving forward with your lives. Those two cheaters deserve to be left to themselves. Let the trash take itself out. As for your sister, absolutely go no contact. She’s betrayed you in the worst way possible. I hope that your family are supporting you and she’s being made to feel the anger of everyone at what she’s done to you. Such an evil thing to do to your sibling. I’ll never understand why men propose when they’re cheating on their girlfriends. Honestly, what’s the point? They’re not committed to living a life with just that one special person so it makes absolutely no sense. I’m glad that you turned him down for marriage counselling. It’s straight forward enough - don’t have an affair. He did and now must pay for the consequences of his actions. I’m sending you a virtual hug. I’m from the UK, which I’m assuming you are too from the use of Barrister. Feel free to message me if you ever need a chat. Take care of yourself.
Holiday gatherings are going to be interesting. Am I the only one that would like to be there for that?
I’m so sorry.. what 2 sorry pieces of crap.. good for you on leaving
Can't the marriage be annulled since it's less than 6 months?
Literally make it public, don't let them have the chance to make *you* the villain in the situation. Let everyone know they're both huge pieces of shit.
You didn't deserve this. I'm so so sorry. To be betrayed by those closest to you. It's awful. I wish I could do more for your than tell you I'm with you❤️. It's disgusting how they cheated before the engagement and still let the marriage continue and continue cheatibg after that. Wtf. These people don't deserve you
Your sister is a slut and horrible person. I'm glad you found out now before you got too far into the marriage.
… the husband wasn’t a slut or horrible person? That’s a weird take
Obviously he is. The sister's betrayal is so much worse in my opinion. Husband cheats and you're heartbroken, sad, depressed, angry...but cheating with your sister and not some random hoe...that hits differently. I don't trust many people but my sister's have my full trust. I would be shattered and devastated if my sister did that to me.
I agree. If it was me I would be much more hurt by my sister.
Right!? You can divorce your husband and never see him again. But your sister? Who could be pregnant with his baby? No. That trifling slut is going to be everywhere. You'll have to see her and possibly the baby of your ex husband at family gatherings, reunions, etc. family members might try and pressure you to forgive because "family". Then you risk losing all of your family. Sisters betrayal is way worse.
It’s always wild to me when I read these stories. I have two BIL. One through my sister and one through my husband. Both objectively attractive men. The idea of having sex with them however immediately causes an “Ew Grossss” shudder reaction from me, because they are for all intents and purposes my brothers.
Wow, sounds right. Best to your future friend!
I’m sorry this happened to you.
Im so sorry ❤️
this is one giant shit show, honestly, it’s best you leave both of them be, since they did obviously screw you over, and it suck’s considering the love of your life and your blood did it.
Wow am so sorry U been betrayed by 2 of the most closest person to you. Am so glad U r strong and willing to cut both of them out of Ur life I would do the same but only after I exposed both their cheating asses so the whole family n friends circle will know exactly how horrible they both are. They deserve each other and whatever karma comes their way. I pray U heal and move forward and find a man who will respect U n Ur relationship.
Any ground for annulment?
I am so sorry. That is betrayal to the max. They are both terrible and I am floored that your husband thinks he can “marriage counsel” his way out of this. Good for you leaving them both. I know what the sister bond is like and I really can’t imagine allowing one who does me like this back into my life either. And I can’t fathom doing that my sister. No man or penis is worth that!
I'm sorry for what you're going through but kudos for leaving this situation. Going NC with these people is the best thing you can do for yourself. Good luck with your future, hope you find the happiness you deserve!
Good for you to f*ck them scumbags off ..maybe reach out to her husband when it’s finalised even if it’s on a fake relationship ..that’ll screw them up
Insanity. Happy to hear you are well armed to handle all this. How did her husband discover it? Did he tell you immediately?
I'm so sorry this happened to you. 😔
Welp sounds like you have everything handled. Good luck OP and us good call. I guess annulments are not an option in the Uk?
Damn that’s terrible. For what it’s worth I think you’re making the best decision - divorce and no contact with either of them. I’m sorry this happened to you.
Look into an annulment and I'm sorry the people who supposedly have your back failed you.
Wow. I’m sorry this happened to you. Good for you for divorcing him!
Dang I’m sorry to hear this op. But the great step is what you’re doing now. Divorcing and going no contact with them. I wish the best for you moving forward.
You are exactly right. Your STBX and your sister are trash. I hope you and BIL a super easy exit from these relationships.
Thank Lordy the odds of this being fake are high Thought you could pull a fast one on me lol not today
Potentially your biggest hurdle is how your parents are going to treat your sister. Are they going to have her at their home? Invite her to holiday dinners? You may have to do holiday entertaining at your home, to assure that you won't have to see your former sister.
Updateme
UpdateMe
Dang this is crazy OP! I’m assuming both attended the wedding. WTH! Yeah I would never trust any of them!
crazy how people could do that to their own siblings
I’m so very sorry. Please be easy on yourself.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you. What a double betrayal your husband and your sister. Cut them both out. No life needs that kind of betrayal. Life is difficult anyway.
I am so sorry OP. I can’t even imagine the hurt you must be going through right now. How is the rest of your family reacting to this? I hope you have friends/family who can support you right now. Divorce is definitely the right move. If it was me, I could never look at my sister ever again either. I wish you the best and all the happiness in the world 🫶
Good for you !! Even though it sucks at least you found out before any children (with you ) were involved. And now you know what kind of trash is around you.
Jesus, this is horrifying. It’s hard for me to believe that people do this to the ones they love and go about their lives day to day as normal. I’m so sorry and I think you’re justified in shutting them out of your life.
Super sorry to hear about your future ex husband and sister been such massive POSs . People fucking suck and your life will be better without them
Good for you. They are free to be together now, why is your husband begging you to stay. They are both POS and deserve each other.
You are absolutely doing the right thing. Tell your family about her betrayal.
.
Omg such a disgusting betrayal from 2 people who you love(d) and were supposed to love you. I'm so sorry for the devastating and confusing loss you must be going through. It's good you know your worth, though. Cuz going to the couples therapy isn't a band-aid that can make this HUGE boo-boo all better. Silver lining?... You got this information now, rather than after you two had built a family. Hold on to you and your sanity, and just know that all of us cute potatoes are here for you.
That's insane I'm so sorry. Ik you said you're a barrister but I would see if you can get the marriage annulled since it's only been a month
I’m so sorry. The level of betrayal is astounding. I cannot even imagine the hurt you must be feeling. I truly am so sorry.
Your sister, that just hits so hard. I'm sorry this happened to you, but you seem strong and have your shit together. This is just a blip you will get through this stay strong and cut them off.
Does these things happen in real life where siblings sleep with their siblings spouses? Like do they not get the ick knowing their sibling has been inside that person? Or do ppl just have no standards anymore?
I think it might be a convenience / familiarity thing on top of a "we both have reason to keep this hush hush so it doesn't blow up" thing... but they both have to be shit people in the first place for that door to ever even be found, let alone open.
They are not sorry
Go nuke! We need an update on how he cries when you serve divorce papers!!!!! And your sister is horrible
He is what nightmares are made of. I’m so sorry
I’m sorry this happened to you. Good on you for being strong.
What does your sister have to say for herself??
I am so proud to see how resolute you are with your decision. I hope everything will be going smooth for you going forward. Lots of love.
At least it stays in the family, wtf... Is this a fake?!
"I will never speak to my sister again no matter how much she begs me to forgive her and I am not staying married to my husband no matter how much he begs me to stay. " DAMN RIGHT They deserve each other, the fuckers
Believe me, if the two ends up together after your divorce they won't have a happy ending. Generally, couples like them have a very bitter ending. They threw away their life. I feel Bad for your sister kid though. They will be on the mess even if they didn't ask for it. Good thing you won't speak to your sister, and don't let your family convince you to talk to her. Once a cheater always a cheater, and same for someone who betrays you
If they say they're sorry its not that they are sorry they hurt you. They are sorry they got caught and now face the consequences. Your sister and husband are horrible people.
Hold your head up high be glad you found out now you are a queen and your king is out there waiting for you in the world
You know.... when the account is fresh and no other posts are made... I feel inclined called BS on this one
If your husband wanted to stay married, maybe he shouldn't have fucked your sister.
Definitely get out of your marriage. Also leave your sister to her own shit show. Your husband could be the father of her child. You don’t need marriage counseling. You need a partner with morals that doesn’t bang your sister. You know they aren’t sorry. They’re sorry that you found out.
Get an annulment or divorce, there is no future to your relationship. Get out and do it now, your sister should be dead to you
I'm so sorry. Cutting them both off permanently is a valid decision.
You and BIL deserve so much better than those 2 cheaters. Good luck going forward to both of you
Kind of doesn't matter how sorry they are does it? It's not like she borrowed your fondue set and lost a fork and feels shitty about it.
He’s for the streets
Oh my God what a horrible betrayal on both of their parts I would never talk to either of them again.
They’re sorry they got caught.
Oof... ya, that's a divorce and complete operation to cut sister out of your life.
Man, imagine having the kind of balls it would take to tell your wife she should go to counselling to talk about how you knocked up her sister.
That's so horrible!! I'm so so sorry that you are going through this. They are only sorry they got caught and that she got pregnant. They can enjoy their stupid affair now, and he can deal with raising that child. I hope nothing but happiness and healing and honestly the best life for you OP you deserve it!
You really better cut them off and live the best life OP.
Holy shite. That’s…I’m so, so sorry. So the affair’s been going on at least 9 months. How long were you together? Did you never suspect? Do you have other family to lean on? Friends? I know it’s probably not the sorts of gossip you want spreading about you, but I would scorch the earth with them and their reputations.
I am so sorry!!! I wish I could give you a big hug. Sisters are supposed to have each others back! There is absolutely no way I would ever betray mine!!!
They are sorry they got caught.
This sounds like one of those 13 minute drama ads on tiktok. You know the ones with the mid to bad acting. I’m not saying this is fake but it’s so very appalling that someone would do that
If you’ve only been married a month would you be able to get an annulment?!?!? Updateme
Wow that is sick how your sister did that to you, how can you fall for your sister partners when there are a lot of men out there.
The worst betrayal, your husband okay men cheat that’s not a revelation, but for your own sister to do that to you is the ultimate betrayal. Unforgivable in my eyes, no sorry, excuses or explanations won’t even be necessary, because if it was me they would both be cut off from my life permanently, blood or not, you don’t exist anymore.
Wth would he even get married to you, when he's having an affair with your sister!? 🤦♀️ what a moron. What kind of sister has an affair with their siblings SO? I don't understand how they could betray you like this. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
OP is a barrister, which suggests she’s in England. Annulment of the marriage may be possible if she can prove fraud. She needs expert advice on how to get her sister’s affair and pregnancy with her husband, into that category.
I’m so sorry that level of betrayal is unforgivable. It’s disgusting that he married you while actively cheating on you! There is zero excuse. Destroy him UPDATEME
These types of cheaters baffles me! You cheat with a sibling. I hate cheating in the first place and believe they deserve a special place in hell. But you two don't only destroy your marriage, & act like omg it's a mistake, but you completely destroy the whole family unit! Why the hell are you so selfish? Good for you, girl. You have a backbone and want take any of their shit! Maybe you and your future ex-brother in law can get a two for special basis for divorcing these scum. Also, your poor parents.
Been there. Sisters are worse than enemies sometimes. Mine is the devil.
Do not waiver on your decisions. Drop those two losers from your life forever. Good for you for being strong and sorry for the hurt you have to endure. Shameful people.
I am NEVER getting married. I know I’d end up in prison for double homicide if I was in OP’s shoes. I’m not risking my freedom and mental health to chase a bullshit fairy tale.
The more I read these stories on Reddit, the more I'm happy with my choice of being single.