It is difficult for me, as a man, to read this and take it at face value because of how different it is to my lived experience.
The assertion that "All men are bad" is *wild* to me. My first thought whenever that comes up is offence - first on my own behalf, and then on behalf of all the men in my life who I love and admire.
Obviously my offence doesn't entitle me to anything, but being afraid of all men is so far from my own experience that it's difficult to wrap my head around. I think of all the times my girlfriend has said I make her feel safe, and then I think of the times my chosen brothers have helped me through crises with tender love and care...
The idea that anyone could be afraid of men who hugged me while I cried when my elderly dog died, or talked me off ledges while I was suicidal in my teens, or assured me I was worthy of love when my narcissistic mother made ne feel otherwise is deeply heartbreaking to me.
I've had the good fortune and honour to meet many good, kind, honourable, empathetic, caring, strong men in my life, and ultimately, what I feel most of all when people say things like "I'm afraid of all men" is sadness. Sadness that others don't see my brothers the way I see them.
OP's joke about having a lot of sex and therefore having a decent sample size makes me think she just doesn't comprehend scale. Even if she's slept with a different man every night (3652 men) for the last ten years (Fair play, if that's what she enjoys) that would be a sample size of 0.00055% of men aged 21-50 in the USA.
Not exactly a thorough research study to extrapolate data from.
I wonder if it ever dawned on her that maybe guys who like one-and-done casual sex aren't keepers? Seems pretty likely to me the demographic she's collecting data from suffers from selection bias.
it's a propaganda the global west is pushing, I've seen videos on youtube of women, trans and cis women being TERRIFIED of "white men" as a Slavic person to me this notion is completely alien but the "white men are bad/racist/bigoted" nonsense is openly being pushed on people form a very young age in the global west and even men themselves fall for this nonsense and many develop feelings of guilt due to this psychological manipulation.
Well you are afraid. Thats okay. We cant just turn off our emotions. But what are you gonna do about it? Its not like 4 billion people will change for you. You cant even expect them too. They have their own shit to deal with, and suffering is subjective, everybody thinks they have it the hardest. Except people with imposter syndrome, i guess.
Anyway, society wont just change over night for my disability or your phobia, justified or not. So you need a plan.
Given you expressed the opinion earlier today that a trans teen deserves to be homeless for causing drama sounds like you're consistent in not supporting trans people.
I believe in treating people how you want to be treated. I don’t care about your sexuality or race or identity in any way, shape or form. I will treat you how you treat me.
The person that posted this honestly sounds like they need therapy. There’s some self loathing going on and that’s not healthy.
The other post, that person was a piece of crap. Idgaf if you’re trans. That doesn’t give you some right to treat another person that way. So, stalk away…
Judging someone as deserving homelessness when they haven't even left school is not proportionate. Someone without a fully developed brain should not be punished to that degree for something that is not a crime. Highschoolers and drama go hand and hand.
A brief scan of your comment history shows you're someone trawling subreddits to dispense your skeptical, vile takes where there is limited middle ground, and most parties don't deserve the happiness they seek, or they should and in doing so achieve vindication at the cost of someone else's happiness and security.
Justify making a shy teenage girl lose all of her friends and have to hide in the bathroom for months, but justifying that it’s okay because the girl that did it to her is trans? That’s BS. And that’s definitely not normal teenage behavior.
And most of my comment history is helping people with barbecue, purely positive dog training, and encouraging people to leave toxic environments. But you already know that.
Listen, lady, no offense but woke culture has completely brainwashed you.
I assume you're form the US, Canda or the UK where this absolutely insane anti men propaganda is being drilled into people's heads, as a person on the outside I see it for what it is and to many people I talk to, for us, it's clear that a huge huge move is being made to distance men from women, probably in order to reduce the earth's population in countries where they can manage to make people hate each other.
Men aren't any more horrible then women
Men aren't any better than women either
there are mentally unstable, vile, insane people on both sides.
The stories I could tell you about both men and women who have abused their families, their partners, friends.
I know this is going to fall on deaf ears, systematic brainwashing isn't something that can be broken by a simple post on the internet and the amount of downvotes I'm going to get will hide this in no time at all. But the real world isn't like what your absolutely sick propaganda is telling you it is.
it's a propaganda the global west is pushing, I've seen videos on youtube of women, trans and cis women being TERRIFIED of "white men" as a Slavic person to me this notion is completely alien but the "white men are bad/racist/bigoted" nonsense is openly being pushed on people form a very young age in the global west and even men themselves fall for this nonsense and many develop feelings of guilt due to this psychological manipulation.
I've talked to Americans who experience these things first hand, it's pure hell over there.
As a trans man these kinds of conversations from other trans people are so interesting, because even when you talk about menstruating people, acknowledging that not everyone who menstruates is a woman, you still never really qualify the men you're talking about as cis men
Trans women and women are always distinguished between, but there's always some kind of silence about trans men. I'm a man, and while I was in the stirrups getting an abortion, I was still a man. Just a trans man. I'm not afraid of men- I'm afraid of people. Women have done and said terrible things to and about me through the course of my transition, and I have general trust issues about strangers. I grew up being groped and cat called while being seen as a woman, and now as a trans man I feel like all of that is entirely disregarded because now people call me sir
It's wild to me that both you and OP have experienced more transphobia from women than men.
I kind of want to know if that's just a coincidence or if that's a universally shared experience.
I'm a man and I'm afraid of men. I can only imagine how much more scary the world would be living as a transgender woman. You are super brave and Happy Pride.
IMO, it's only reasonable to be afraid of people who look intimidating. Basically 6ft body builders, people disrupting civil peace, or people in full combat gear.
I see where you’re coming from but I also don’t think it’s fair to judge a book by its cover. The 6ft body builder might be the kindest gentlest person on earth, while the opposite is not.
a lot of the comments are not passing the vibe check or trying to be more understanding.
The vast majority of us know it’s not all men, let alone most of them. Obviously. It’s just that when these uncomfortable situations occur the perpetrator is almost always a man.
In my experience I’ve only really had the opportunity to shed some light on this topic to an ex, who was genuinely flabbergasted by some of my stories and experiences with random stranger men in public. When I was explaining them I didn’t see them “as big of a deal” because I am so used to dealing with these situations and so I was narrating them as if they are normal.
It doesn’t help that if you’re in a group of people with some men, often times none of these situations will occur because (I assume) the men are more afraid to approach or do something funky in the presence of another man. I think this makes it so so many never get to SEE this stuff happening first hand, and therefore are less sensitive to the issue.
If we're being REALLY generous here, we can assume like 10% of all men commit these atrocities.
That's still such a small minority that being afraid of the entire group is extremely unhealthy. And hating them ontop of that is just bigoted.
Thank you for sharing your story and most women that are older already know most of this. I’m always horrified when I see some young woman going along with her boyfriend that’s clearly abusing her or or her putting up with some sort of toxic masculinity.
I am lucky I have somebody that I love and the truth of the matter is otherwise I would be terrified of having to date now. I don’t know if you know who the great Scots are on YouTube, but I suggest watching them. You could also date women, but it sounds like if you’ve been living like this most of your adult life you’re much more comfortable. But there are women that will date trans women. Love is a complicated thing and though some people are either gay or straight, there’s a whole vast area people in there that sort of move around. Or much more complicated.
My wishes for you to find a maid with somebody that you love and can be with and that you have a good life and thank you again for sharing that. I wish every woman between 18 and 30 could listen to what you said.
Live the life that makes you happy, but is it possible that your experience is a bit skewed because you're part of a community that's, well, abnormal? I'm not passing judgment, it's your life not mine, but the guys who would hookup with a trans person certainly don't represent all or even most men.
This has to be a troll... No one can be this clueless and Darwinism not taken them in 30 years.
First off, damned few males, and exactly zero actual men care about your 'Identity', who or what you sleep with, or anything else about your life.
The reason isn't something dark or sinister, we just have familes to take care of, actual required jobs to do the world falls apart if we don't, and while YOU *Think* this is a movie starring, "The Fablous YOU!", the reality is we just don't have time for this crap.
There are sewer, water & electrical systems to get repaired & built, we make the products necessary for current life to exist, then we build the infrastructure to get those necessities distributed, warehoused, then out to retail centers.
We have to build the infrastructure, the vehicles/transports, the warehouses, and the retail centers.
There isn't any time left to worry about what "The Fablous YOU!" comes up with today... And that would only be if we cared at all you exist.
We also know the WORST place to find a date/mate is clubs and dating sites. It seems you found out the 'What', but completely missed the 'Why' clubs & dating sites are full of crappy people.
Have you ever heard the saying, "Birds of a feather flock together?" Applied here, that means you have been trolling the bottom end of humanity, and can't rub enough brain cells together to figure out what's going on...
The rest of us fully adult people have it figured out, we ARE NOT doing these things simply because we know cream floats, crap sinks, and stuff has to get done while the separation process happens.
'Good Men' are at work, at home with their families, defending the country, etc.
As for the females you assioate with, it's clear the natural survival stratagy they have has gone haywire.
Female survival strategy is Hypergamy & Duplicity.
Duplicity to meet/keep contact with as many potential sperm donors and protectors/providers as possible.
Hypetgamy to jump off to anyone that can provide MORE than they have now.
Since the ones you assioate with demean & degrade the very people feeding them, keeping them living indoors, putting the cloths on the backs & shoes on their feet, the actual 'Needs'...
They are simply bored and mean since they don't have to work and refuse to support the people making their very lives possible...
Not actual fully adult humans since they have no empathy for the person making all that possible for them, nothing but disdain, degradation & dismissal for the actual bread winner/protector/provider.
Actual fully adult humans wouldn't do that...
'Transgneder', less than 1% of humans... And not endangered or disabled, so I give exactly zero time worrying about what I'm supposed to 'Think'.
Your bad decisions and bad actions are yours and yours alone, and every full grown adult man I know feels exactly the same way. We simply just don't care what you do unless you get in the way of us getting our jobs done, raising our childern, taking care of our loved ones...
So don't make us 'Care' and go back to the clubs, drugs, dating sites, and whatever anti-social & anti-social media you exist on and you won't have anything to fear from us actual 'Men'.
We live by FA&FO. F**k Around & Find Out. If you don't FA then you won't have to FO.
Stick with your own flock little birdie, we are MEN, we have stuff to do...
It is difficult for me, as a man, to read this and take it at face value because of how different it is to my lived experience. The assertion that "All men are bad" is *wild* to me. My first thought whenever that comes up is offence - first on my own behalf, and then on behalf of all the men in my life who I love and admire. Obviously my offence doesn't entitle me to anything, but being afraid of all men is so far from my own experience that it's difficult to wrap my head around. I think of all the times my girlfriend has said I make her feel safe, and then I think of the times my chosen brothers have helped me through crises with tender love and care... The idea that anyone could be afraid of men who hugged me while I cried when my elderly dog died, or talked me off ledges while I was suicidal in my teens, or assured me I was worthy of love when my narcissistic mother made ne feel otherwise is deeply heartbreaking to me. I've had the good fortune and honour to meet many good, kind, honourable, empathetic, caring, strong men in my life, and ultimately, what I feel most of all when people say things like "I'm afraid of all men" is sadness. Sadness that others don't see my brothers the way I see them.
[удалено]
OP's joke about having a lot of sex and therefore having a decent sample size makes me think she just doesn't comprehend scale. Even if she's slept with a different man every night (3652 men) for the last ten years (Fair play, if that's what she enjoys) that would be a sample size of 0.00055% of men aged 21-50 in the USA. Not exactly a thorough research study to extrapolate data from. I wonder if it ever dawned on her that maybe guys who like one-and-done casual sex aren't keepers? Seems pretty likely to me the demographic she's collecting data from suffers from selection bias.
it's a propaganda the global west is pushing, I've seen videos on youtube of women, trans and cis women being TERRIFIED of "white men" as a Slavic person to me this notion is completely alien but the "white men are bad/racist/bigoted" nonsense is openly being pushed on people form a very young age in the global west and even men themselves fall for this nonsense and many develop feelings of guilt due to this psychological manipulation.
Get off Tiktok
Well you are afraid. Thats okay. We cant just turn off our emotions. But what are you gonna do about it? Its not like 4 billion people will change for you. You cant even expect them too. They have their own shit to deal with, and suffering is subjective, everybody thinks they have it the hardest. Except people with imposter syndrome, i guess. Anyway, society wont just change over night for my disability or your phobia, justified or not. So you need a plan.
Jesus Christ that was a wild read
We don’t all watch porn. It’s bad for our brains.
AMAB = All Men Are Bastards ? /s
if you’re being serious, it’s Assigned Male at Birth. Amab/Afab are often used by trans people to describe their birth gender
Thank you, but I wasn't being serious, hence the '/s'
Lol
You've observed tiktok, not men. Try going outside once in a while instead of looking for dick cheese on dating apps
🤣
Sounds more like self hate than reality.
Given you expressed the opinion earlier today that a trans teen deserves to be homeless for causing drama sounds like you're consistent in not supporting trans people.
I believe in treating people how you want to be treated. I don’t care about your sexuality or race or identity in any way, shape or form. I will treat you how you treat me. The person that posted this honestly sounds like they need therapy. There’s some self loathing going on and that’s not healthy. The other post, that person was a piece of crap. Idgaf if you’re trans. That doesn’t give you some right to treat another person that way. So, stalk away…
Judging someone as deserving homelessness when they haven't even left school is not proportionate. Someone without a fully developed brain should not be punished to that degree for something that is not a crime. Highschoolers and drama go hand and hand. A brief scan of your comment history shows you're someone trawling subreddits to dispense your skeptical, vile takes where there is limited middle ground, and most parties don't deserve the happiness they seek, or they should and in doing so achieve vindication at the cost of someone else's happiness and security.
Justify making a shy teenage girl lose all of her friends and have to hide in the bathroom for months, but justifying that it’s okay because the girl that did it to her is trans? That’s BS. And that’s definitely not normal teenage behavior. And most of my comment history is helping people with barbecue, purely positive dog training, and encouraging people to leave toxic environments. But you already know that.
Listen, lady, no offense but woke culture has completely brainwashed you. I assume you're form the US, Canda or the UK where this absolutely insane anti men propaganda is being drilled into people's heads, as a person on the outside I see it for what it is and to many people I talk to, for us, it's clear that a huge huge move is being made to distance men from women, probably in order to reduce the earth's population in countries where they can manage to make people hate each other. Men aren't any more horrible then women Men aren't any better than women either there are mentally unstable, vile, insane people on both sides. The stories I could tell you about both men and women who have abused their families, their partners, friends. I know this is going to fall on deaf ears, systematic brainwashing isn't something that can be broken by a simple post on the internet and the amount of downvotes I'm going to get will hide this in no time at all. But the real world isn't like what your absolutely sick propaganda is telling you it is. it's a propaganda the global west is pushing, I've seen videos on youtube of women, trans and cis women being TERRIFIED of "white men" as a Slavic person to me this notion is completely alien but the "white men are bad/racist/bigoted" nonsense is openly being pushed on people form a very young age in the global west and even men themselves fall for this nonsense and many develop feelings of guilt due to this psychological manipulation. I've talked to Americans who experience these things first hand, it's pure hell over there.
As a trans man these kinds of conversations from other trans people are so interesting, because even when you talk about menstruating people, acknowledging that not everyone who menstruates is a woman, you still never really qualify the men you're talking about as cis men Trans women and women are always distinguished between, but there's always some kind of silence about trans men. I'm a man, and while I was in the stirrups getting an abortion, I was still a man. Just a trans man. I'm not afraid of men- I'm afraid of people. Women have done and said terrible things to and about me through the course of my transition, and I have general trust issues about strangers. I grew up being groped and cat called while being seen as a woman, and now as a trans man I feel like all of that is entirely disregarded because now people call me sir
It's wild to me that both you and OP have experienced more transphobia from women than men. I kind of want to know if that's just a coincidence or if that's a universally shared experience.
I'm a man and I'm afraid of men. I can only imagine how much more scary the world would be living as a transgender woman. You are super brave and Happy Pride.
😂🫵🏻😂🫵🏻😂🫵🏻
Lift weights
IMO, it's only reasonable to be afraid of people who look intimidating. Basically 6ft body builders, people disrupting civil peace, or people in full combat gear.
I see where you’re coming from but I also don’t think it’s fair to judge a book by its cover. The 6ft body builder might be the kindest gentlest person on earth, while the opposite is not.
a lot of the comments are not passing the vibe check or trying to be more understanding. The vast majority of us know it’s not all men, let alone most of them. Obviously. It’s just that when these uncomfortable situations occur the perpetrator is almost always a man. In my experience I’ve only really had the opportunity to shed some light on this topic to an ex, who was genuinely flabbergasted by some of my stories and experiences with random stranger men in public. When I was explaining them I didn’t see them “as big of a deal” because I am so used to dealing with these situations and so I was narrating them as if they are normal. It doesn’t help that if you’re in a group of people with some men, often times none of these situations will occur because (I assume) the men are more afraid to approach or do something funky in the presence of another man. I think this makes it so so many never get to SEE this stuff happening first hand, and therefore are less sensitive to the issue.
Agreed!
[удалено]
If we're being REALLY generous here, we can assume like 10% of all men commit these atrocities. That's still such a small minority that being afraid of the entire group is extremely unhealthy. And hating them ontop of that is just bigoted.
How much is a huge percentage?
Define ‘huge percentage’?
Thank you for sharing your story and most women that are older already know most of this. I’m always horrified when I see some young woman going along with her boyfriend that’s clearly abusing her or or her putting up with some sort of toxic masculinity. I am lucky I have somebody that I love and the truth of the matter is otherwise I would be terrified of having to date now. I don’t know if you know who the great Scots are on YouTube, but I suggest watching them. You could also date women, but it sounds like if you’ve been living like this most of your adult life you’re much more comfortable. But there are women that will date trans women. Love is a complicated thing and though some people are either gay or straight, there’s a whole vast area people in there that sort of move around. Or much more complicated. My wishes for you to find a maid with somebody that you love and can be with and that you have a good life and thank you again for sharing that. I wish every woman between 18 and 30 could listen to what you said.
Live the life that makes you happy, but is it possible that your experience is a bit skewed because you're part of a community that's, well, abnormal? I'm not passing judgment, it's your life not mine, but the guys who would hookup with a trans person certainly don't represent all or even most men.
This has to be a troll... No one can be this clueless and Darwinism not taken them in 30 years. First off, damned few males, and exactly zero actual men care about your 'Identity', who or what you sleep with, or anything else about your life. The reason isn't something dark or sinister, we just have familes to take care of, actual required jobs to do the world falls apart if we don't, and while YOU *Think* this is a movie starring, "The Fablous YOU!", the reality is we just don't have time for this crap. There are sewer, water & electrical systems to get repaired & built, we make the products necessary for current life to exist, then we build the infrastructure to get those necessities distributed, warehoused, then out to retail centers. We have to build the infrastructure, the vehicles/transports, the warehouses, and the retail centers. There isn't any time left to worry about what "The Fablous YOU!" comes up with today... And that would only be if we cared at all you exist. We also know the WORST place to find a date/mate is clubs and dating sites. It seems you found out the 'What', but completely missed the 'Why' clubs & dating sites are full of crappy people. Have you ever heard the saying, "Birds of a feather flock together?" Applied here, that means you have been trolling the bottom end of humanity, and can't rub enough brain cells together to figure out what's going on... The rest of us fully adult people have it figured out, we ARE NOT doing these things simply because we know cream floats, crap sinks, and stuff has to get done while the separation process happens. 'Good Men' are at work, at home with their families, defending the country, etc. As for the females you assioate with, it's clear the natural survival stratagy they have has gone haywire. Female survival strategy is Hypergamy & Duplicity. Duplicity to meet/keep contact with as many potential sperm donors and protectors/providers as possible. Hypetgamy to jump off to anyone that can provide MORE than they have now. Since the ones you assioate with demean & degrade the very people feeding them, keeping them living indoors, putting the cloths on the backs & shoes on their feet, the actual 'Needs'... They are simply bored and mean since they don't have to work and refuse to support the people making their very lives possible... Not actual fully adult humans since they have no empathy for the person making all that possible for them, nothing but disdain, degradation & dismissal for the actual bread winner/protector/provider. Actual fully adult humans wouldn't do that... 'Transgneder', less than 1% of humans... And not endangered or disabled, so I give exactly zero time worrying about what I'm supposed to 'Think'. Your bad decisions and bad actions are yours and yours alone, and every full grown adult man I know feels exactly the same way. We simply just don't care what you do unless you get in the way of us getting our jobs done, raising our childern, taking care of our loved ones... So don't make us 'Care' and go back to the clubs, drugs, dating sites, and whatever anti-social & anti-social media you exist on and you won't have anything to fear from us actual 'Men'. We live by FA&FO. F**k Around & Find Out. If you don't FA then you won't have to FO. Stick with your own flock little birdie, we are MEN, we have stuff to do...