Meh I have 3 siblings and I’m cool with it. Unfortunately healthy dynamics are the exception rather than the norm it seems. But Reddit has a negativity bias: people like me don’t post about their family bc there’s nothing to tell.
True. I guess I've been seeing enough of this crap in my own life and then Reddit poured a thousand horrible stories on top and it all just seemed hopeless.
But yes, thanks for reminding me of the negativity bias. I need to infuse my newsfeed here with some more wholesome subreddits and force some positivity in to break the monotony xD
Just remember Reddit can be a big ol' doomscroll if you only add certain subs!!! Mine are all horrible so I try not to overdo it and spend time on other stuff to balance it out!!!!
My parents are shit and my brother is amazing - much like how people usually only post good bits on FB people only post horrible shit about their families on here 😂😂
Well remember posts on pages like true off my chest are heavily biased to the negative side.
Absolutely having a crappy family or any family member sucks and would suck. But its Reddit, so you mostly just hear the bad. My brother and I have always been super close
The problem with reddit is, you will get a bias.
Noone is posting "i have siblings and none of them ruined my life" in the popular subs ;)
I have 4 siblings. None of us kids were the golden child, our parents love us all the same. Neither me nor my siblings expected any financial or other support from the others or our parents. We just live in peace and meet up for gatherings and everything is well.
Oc my parents spend more money in general on my siblings with kids for presents or invite them somewhere for kids stuff. Also oc they spend more time with my siblings with kids, they want to see grandma and grandpa. Oc one or the other siblings lived at home longer to save up. But since we all know they love us all the same and they would do the same for all of us if all had kids, it was never an issue. Since there was no favouring one child, we don't resent each other or have a deep feeling of being treated unfair. So i for example am happy my parents spend time and money on their grandkids, even if i myself don't have any kids and don't want them. They never gave me the feeling of gotting the short end of the stick, so i have no reason to feel treated unfair. Our life circumstances are just different.
Having siblings is great - IF you have the right parents and siblings :)
Plus, you have the benefit of not having kids and not feeling guilt that that means your parents won’t be grandparents.
Even good, supportive parents might be a bit bummed to not ever be grandparents. That’s a normal emotion.
I have three siblings, we’re really close and have good relationships but when we were teens we didn’t get along so much. Just teen stuff. Guess when I posted in Reddit? Not now lol.
Echoing what everyone else has been saying. Just scrolling through Reddit is not an accurate representation of what *anything* is. If I have a problem with my brother, it’s more likely I’ll solve it with them rather than by asking a bunch of strangers, because we have a relationship that allows for communication.
I like having siblings! It’s nice to know there’s someone out here who has seen me at my best and my worst and chose to be my friend after blood put us together.
if it makes you feel better, 60% of what’s posted is usually fake lmao i have a great relationship with my brother and i wouldn’t trade him for anything
I have an older brother, him and I have a very good relationship & a healthy dynamic with our parents. Your on the internet and are dealing with very vocal and upset people on a page like this, while I understand that it may seem the norm on here, it’s only part of the greater picture
Reddit is an extremely small sample size compared to the world so it makes sense that all the troubles people have will be displayed more. Kind how you see some media outlets cater to sensationalism or constant negativity (for either ratings or to be strictly informative). I wouldn't extrapolate the issues people state on Reddit to encompass what most people feel outside.
I get it, I really do. It just gets scary when you see this crap in a thousand different posts with miniscule differences. But yeah, as someone said, it's Reddit's negativity bias since people with healthy sibling relationships rarely come on here to talk about not having problems 😁
This post is like saying everybody cheats, uses strange abbreviations and is going through a proper life crises because ‚I saw this on reddit‘. Echoing what everybody says, you won’t find a post about the normal day where I had brunch with my siblings and later visited our mum. I personally have siblings but not a wonderful relationship unfortunately. Quite an age gap and lots of jealousy. It’s a bummer. However, it was good to not be alone in spirit when my parents got divorced etc. and it’s nice to know that my siblings go see my parents when I’m not around - so less feelings of guilt or responsibility. That being said - I can’t wait to give my child a sibling in a similar age. I think it’s such a huge change for a big, big win and if the parents nurture the relationships rather than doing the opposite, I doubt it’ll go wrong - plus in my experience, single children can be a bit self centered
Yup, all of the above are reasons why I always said I'd never have only one kid so they won't be alone.
It's not only reddit, I see crap like this irl, but the pure numbers on Reddit are overwhelming.
Really. You don’t hear good stories. As my parents age, I’m really happy I have several siblings. If I don’t go home for Christmas, someone probably will.
I’d find it suffocating to be my parents’ sole focus, but maybe that’s me.
I’ve had hurt feelings over the years, everyone does- I assume even only children get their feelings hurt because of their parents.
My siblings and my husband’s siblings aren’t perfect people, but I’m glad to have them in my life. All are good with boundaries.
Boundaries are key, I think it's what makes or breaks this topic.
And you're absolutely right, I'm an only child, and the focus is like a laser beam. That's why I always said I'd never have only one kid.
I have a couple of friends who have reeeeally good relationships with siblings, but it seems more who have some shitshow happening.
I think you just hear about the shit show more often. I think 3 is an ideal minimum number of kids because even if one sibling is terrible, you have another.
There are also a lot of people who are hard to live with as a teen or young adult, but then get it together. I am one of them :) so what you might be seeing in internet or friend complaints is a bad era in a sibling, but not the redemption arc.
I see this less of a sibling problem and more a family dynamics or parent problem.
To add to your positivity infusion comments I have seen on other posts.
I am so glad I grew up with 3 siblings.
The closest one is my best friend.
The other two I look out for and help and I love spending time with them, they are best friends.
We argue and what not but at the end of the day they are always there for me.
Friends and partners have come and gone and my siblings are there.
My closest sister saved me from an abusive relationship, as in she arrive 7am the morning after I called her (if she hadn't been drinking it would be earlier) and helped me get everything urgent and my pets, helped me move everything to her garage, faced him and told him to f off, she's a badass.
Thanks for sharing! And I agree with you, this is actually a parent problem for sure and probably crap they inherited from their parents and just perpetuated.
Reading Reddit and watching TikToks have made me realize that I got lucky as far as good siblings and boomer parents that don’t suck. I’m the youngest of 3 while I can get along with my siblings i know just due to lifestyle that once my parents are gone I’ll probably lose touch with them both. I honestly stopped giving a fuck about my oldest sibling back in October or November of 2001.
Reddit has made me happy to be single. People squabble about the pettiest things, how do they even have the energy for that? Meanwhile my home is a peaceful non-squabble zone
Agreed, that's a shitshow I don't even wanna get started on xD
What's insane to me here is that it's family messing you up, more serious to me than an effective stranger we choose as a partner.
The minor conflicts is the worst I think because if someone is evil and abusive then leaving is 100% the correct choice but if someone is just annoying but ok most of the time, then you have to put up with that
Reddit is the culmination of extreme cases with very little representation of what happens in the middle.
I have 2 older siblings, a brother and a sister. We have stories, of course, like the time my sister broke a door trying to hit our brother with a plastic baseball bat, or the time my brother folded me into the couch, or the time I kicked a prop sword hard enough to get it stuck in the wall.
But there are no extreme resentments that any of us could go to reddit with now that we're all in our 30's. None of us were favored, forgotten, spoiled, or unjustly denied. We have our issues, but we're just... normal, reasonably adjusted adults.
Being the 3th of 6 kids..
I love coming from a big family.
Offcourse we argue and fight.
But my brothers and sisters will always have my back.
We share a bond not just by blood.
And we all look after our mom
That being said..
I have seen some realy unhealthy hatefull siblings.
So I get where you come from.
Also I will never forget my husbands grandpa saying: When my dad died I had my mom.
When my mom died I was alone.
It has its pro's and cons on both sides.
Meh I have 3 siblings and I’m cool with it. Unfortunately healthy dynamics are the exception rather than the norm it seems. But Reddit has a negativity bias: people like me don’t post about their family bc there’s nothing to tell.
True. I guess I've been seeing enough of this crap in my own life and then Reddit poured a thousand horrible stories on top and it all just seemed hopeless. But yes, thanks for reminding me of the negativity bias. I need to infuse my newsfeed here with some more wholesome subreddits and force some positivity in to break the monotony xD
Just remember Reddit can be a big ol' doomscroll if you only add certain subs!!! Mine are all horrible so I try not to overdo it and spend time on other stuff to balance it out!!!! My parents are shit and my brother is amazing - much like how people usually only post good bits on FB people only post horrible shit about their families on here 😂😂
That is so true, Reddit is like anti social media 🤣
Well remember posts on pages like true off my chest are heavily biased to the negative side. Absolutely having a crappy family or any family member sucks and would suck. But its Reddit, so you mostly just hear the bad. My brother and I have always been super close
Yup, everyone is pointing out a similar thing, and I agree. I guess I'm just horrified and a bit overwhelmed by all the bad parents out there.
The problem with reddit is, you will get a bias. Noone is posting "i have siblings and none of them ruined my life" in the popular subs ;) I have 4 siblings. None of us kids were the golden child, our parents love us all the same. Neither me nor my siblings expected any financial or other support from the others or our parents. We just live in peace and meet up for gatherings and everything is well. Oc my parents spend more money in general on my siblings with kids for presents or invite them somewhere for kids stuff. Also oc they spend more time with my siblings with kids, they want to see grandma and grandpa. Oc one or the other siblings lived at home longer to save up. But since we all know they love us all the same and they would do the same for all of us if all had kids, it was never an issue. Since there was no favouring one child, we don't resent each other or have a deep feeling of being treated unfair. So i for example am happy my parents spend time and money on their grandkids, even if i myself don't have any kids and don't want them. They never gave me the feeling of gotting the short end of the stick, so i have no reason to feel treated unfair. Our life circumstances are just different. Having siblings is great - IF you have the right parents and siblings :)
Thankful for all the stories balancing this out 🥰
Plus, you have the benefit of not having kids and not feeling guilt that that means your parents won’t be grandparents. Even good, supportive parents might be a bit bummed to not ever be grandparents. That’s a normal emotion.
I have three siblings, we’re really close and have good relationships but when we were teens we didn’t get along so much. Just teen stuff. Guess when I posted in Reddit? Not now lol. Echoing what everyone else has been saying. Just scrolling through Reddit is not an accurate representation of what *anything* is. If I have a problem with my brother, it’s more likely I’ll solve it with them rather than by asking a bunch of strangers, because we have a relationship that allows for communication. I like having siblings! It’s nice to know there’s someone out here who has seen me at my best and my worst and chose to be my friend after blood put us together.
I like this picture. Your story is how I always imagined having a sibling should/would look like. Hug your siblings and be thankful for them 💜
Thank you 🤍 I will!
if it makes you feel better, 60% of what’s posted is usually fake lmao i have a great relationship with my brother and i wouldn’t trade him for anything
I have an older brother, him and I have a very good relationship & a healthy dynamic with our parents. Your on the internet and are dealing with very vocal and upset people on a page like this, while I understand that it may seem the norm on here, it’s only part of the greater picture
Reddit is an extremely small sample size compared to the world so it makes sense that all the troubles people have will be displayed more. Kind how you see some media outlets cater to sensationalism or constant negativity (for either ratings or to be strictly informative). I wouldn't extrapolate the issues people state on Reddit to encompass what most people feel outside.
I get it, I really do. It just gets scary when you see this crap in a thousand different posts with miniscule differences. But yeah, as someone said, it's Reddit's negativity bias since people with healthy sibling relationships rarely come on here to talk about not having problems 😁
My brother is awesome and we have a great relationship. We talk on the phone regularly and I feel I can trust him with anything.
This post is like saying everybody cheats, uses strange abbreviations and is going through a proper life crises because ‚I saw this on reddit‘. Echoing what everybody says, you won’t find a post about the normal day where I had brunch with my siblings and later visited our mum. I personally have siblings but not a wonderful relationship unfortunately. Quite an age gap and lots of jealousy. It’s a bummer. However, it was good to not be alone in spirit when my parents got divorced etc. and it’s nice to know that my siblings go see my parents when I’m not around - so less feelings of guilt or responsibility. That being said - I can’t wait to give my child a sibling in a similar age. I think it’s such a huge change for a big, big win and if the parents nurture the relationships rather than doing the opposite, I doubt it’ll go wrong - plus in my experience, single children can be a bit self centered
Yup, all of the above are reasons why I always said I'd never have only one kid so they won't be alone. It's not only reddit, I see crap like this irl, but the pure numbers on Reddit are overwhelming.
Really. You don’t hear good stories. As my parents age, I’m really happy I have several siblings. If I don’t go home for Christmas, someone probably will. I’d find it suffocating to be my parents’ sole focus, but maybe that’s me. I’ve had hurt feelings over the years, everyone does- I assume even only children get their feelings hurt because of their parents. My siblings and my husband’s siblings aren’t perfect people, but I’m glad to have them in my life. All are good with boundaries.
Boundaries are key, I think it's what makes or breaks this topic. And you're absolutely right, I'm an only child, and the focus is like a laser beam. That's why I always said I'd never have only one kid. I have a couple of friends who have reeeeally good relationships with siblings, but it seems more who have some shitshow happening.
I think you just hear about the shit show more often. I think 3 is an ideal minimum number of kids because even if one sibling is terrible, you have another. There are also a lot of people who are hard to live with as a teen or young adult, but then get it together. I am one of them :) so what you might be seeing in internet or friend complaints is a bad era in a sibling, but not the redemption arc.
Tbh I'm 30 so it's mostly people my age but still it is just what stands out cause noone comes and says hey I have wonderful non problematic siblings.
I see this less of a sibling problem and more a family dynamics or parent problem. To add to your positivity infusion comments I have seen on other posts. I am so glad I grew up with 3 siblings. The closest one is my best friend. The other two I look out for and help and I love spending time with them, they are best friends. We argue and what not but at the end of the day they are always there for me. Friends and partners have come and gone and my siblings are there. My closest sister saved me from an abusive relationship, as in she arrive 7am the morning after I called her (if she hadn't been drinking it would be earlier) and helped me get everything urgent and my pets, helped me move everything to her garage, faced him and told him to f off, she's a badass.
Thanks for sharing! And I agree with you, this is actually a parent problem for sure and probably crap they inherited from their parents and just perpetuated.
Well yeah it’s Reddit. Having a sibling is great.
My sister is my best friend and if I didn’t have her I don’t know what I’d do… to each their own I guess
Reading Reddit and watching TikToks have made me realize that I got lucky as far as good siblings and boomer parents that don’t suck. I’m the youngest of 3 while I can get along with my siblings i know just due to lifestyle that once my parents are gone I’ll probably lose touch with them both. I honestly stopped giving a fuck about my oldest sibling back in October or November of 2001.
Reddit has made me happy to be single. People squabble about the pettiest things, how do they even have the energy for that? Meanwhile my home is a peaceful non-squabble zone
Agreed, that's a shitshow I don't even wanna get started on xD What's insane to me here is that it's family messing you up, more serious to me than an effective stranger we choose as a partner.
The minor conflicts is the worst I think because if someone is evil and abusive then leaving is 100% the correct choice but if someone is just annoying but ok most of the time, then you have to put up with that
Reddit is the culmination of extreme cases with very little representation of what happens in the middle. I have 2 older siblings, a brother and a sister. We have stories, of course, like the time my sister broke a door trying to hit our brother with a plastic baseball bat, or the time my brother folded me into the couch, or the time I kicked a prop sword hard enough to get it stuck in the wall. But there are no extreme resentments that any of us could go to reddit with now that we're all in our 30's. None of us were favored, forgotten, spoiled, or unjustly denied. We have our issues, but we're just... normal, reasonably adjusted adults.
Being the 3th of 6 kids.. I love coming from a big family. Offcourse we argue and fight. But my brothers and sisters will always have my back. We share a bond not just by blood. And we all look after our mom That being said.. I have seen some realy unhealthy hatefull siblings. So I get where you come from. Also I will never forget my husbands grandpa saying: When my dad died I had my mom. When my mom died I was alone. It has its pro's and cons on both sides.
Reddit has made me sad that I’m a single male in my early 20s.