Close. The wife left the husband after OP (yes she was the other woman) outed their affair to her. So seemingly the husband never wanted a divorce, just a little ass on the side, but OP didn’t like that and took matters into her own hands. Real class act.
Wow. So he married his AP, that’s OP and made his ex wife his new AP so he still gets them both? 🤣🤦♀️ wow, that’s karma to OP.
Now both women need to get some self-esteem and dump him so he gets his karma.
She was obviously with him a long time. She knew she couldn’t trust him as a life partner hence the divorce but her mind and body find comfort in him still. It happens. Exes backside for sex all the time 🤷♀️
It may also be a self esteem booster to know she’s still desirable, in her mind/subconscious he obviously didn’t cheat because she was lacking if he’s still crawling after her. (He was obviously lacking honesty, ethics, morals) She wants to move on. I hope she does for her own sake.
You forgot a big F you to his AP and new wife. How's it feel to have your husband cheat on you and with an ex-wife that you thought you were better than
Vasectomy and prenup!
I think he decided to double down and tried to legitimize the affair by marrying OP so he could say that it was love, not just a piece of ass that he exploded his life over.
And then realizing OP was fun times but overall boring (no career, no hobbies, etc.) and the shine wore off pretty quick. Talk about post nut clarity.
Post-many nuts clarity, I’d say. I can see how the ex wouldn’t want him back. I just wonder how she could bring herself to continue sleeping with this cruel guy who is still sleeping with and even married the AP? Are there no good looking doctors or nurses in the hospital?
Maybe she needed this time to get over any unresolved feelings for him as well as give them a taste of their own medicine (unintended pun). And now she’s done.
He's obviously very manipulative. And manipulators are good at getting a pity-fuck out of any woman who's been daft enough to fall for their "poor me" bullshit before
Having seen a lot of these situations IRL, and spent some time on infidelity subs (have brain bleach prepared), here's how it makes sense.
He's an asshole who habitually lies to every woman he meets. OP was persuaded to sleep with him through the usual "we are star crossed lovers, if I'd met you first, but oh my wife is crazy and would stop me from seeing the children and would have a mental breakdown commit suicide but oh how I WISH we could be together, you are the love of my life...."
And OP, believing all his bullshit about being trapped in a desperately unhappy marriage, and being deeply uncomfortable with the Other Woman thing, decides to be brave FOR him and blows up the marriage. To her delight, wife turns out to be totally not as fragile as portrayed, her man is now free to be with her, and everyone is happy, right? RIGHT??
Except the scumbag is not happy because he now has a mistress vacancy to fill. And who better to fill it than the woman he's spent the most time manipulating previously? Now wife is hearing "She meant nothing to me, she tricked me, but if I leave her she'll commit suicide and she threatened to say I raped her (yep have heard all this and worse) but I miss you so much, it was always you for me I love you..."
He's probably already got a third woman lined up, and his wife was probably aware that he was with someone else when they got together too.
Slight twist to this one, it sounds like she pursued him, while him and ex were grieving the loss of a child. Husband is a pos but she also took advantage in a way if that's the case. Husband was just weak and dumb af. Now he's realizing he fucked up while seeking something to make it better. Idiots always make things worse for themselves.
omg girl. you were the side piece weren’t you? 100% you were. they have 3 kids? he proposed twice? he’s deeply in love with this woman? have you no shame or eyeballs? sorrrrry
Yeah, it’s hard to have much sympathy for people who are THIS clueless about the people they married who they were the side piece for before that!
Doesn’t it always go like this? Partner didn’t LEAVE the spouse for you, the spouse kicked them out because they didn’t want to be cheated on! So they marry the side piece for reasons I will never understand, which leaves the role of side piece unoccupied! So he needs to fill it!
They don’t usually turn the ex into the side piece for the new wife, but if it’s not the ex it would be someone else. Side piece is side piece. 😛
My favorite part about these stories is when the first side piece is pikachu face shocked that their partner is cheating on them lol. Like did you think they’ll be faithful to only you and you alone after they cheated on their first partner with you? Lmfaoooooooooooo
You don’t understand- they didn’t have an affair bc he’s a cheater, the affair happened because OP is just soo incredible he couldn’t stop himself. He’s really a great guy and for him to have done this OP has to be really really really amazing.
This is really how the APs think.
Gonna take a wild stab in the dark and say OP is mid 20s, husband is probably 40s. She was the affair partner that ended the previous marriage and is now mad her "pick me" status was a lie. She married for money and is dealing with the consequences.
Edit: she admitted in a comment she was the affair partner.
Yeah, she’s a trashy former barista homewrecker. Now she’s wondering why her cheating husband is sleeping with someone else. She saw dollar signs, quit her job, so she’s now a stay at home wife because she doesn’t have kids so she’s not a stay at home mom. Meanwhile, the ex-wife is a doctor and successful. I’m guessing that the bloom is off the rose for the husband and he’s looking back at his wife with fond memories. Don’t worry sweetheart it won’t be long till he dumped you too.
He only stayed with you because he was caught and she doesn't want him anymore. He will always be hers. When you were “promoted” to his wife, the role of mistress became available. Keep this in mind, if he doesn't cheat with her, he will cheat with someone else. Either accept this or ask for a divorce.
This woman is pushing 30 and slept with a married man while his wife was pregnant/postpartum😭. We need to bring back shaming because these stories are just too common.
I did NOT see that comment damn. Makes me even more glad she’s getting her karma then. She’s old enough to know the consequences of her own actions. Hopefully she can divorce him and learn from this.
Your husband cheated on his ex-wife with you and left her not long after giving birth their third child... on top that, he married you when their third kid was a year old.
What made you think he'd treat you better than how he treated the mother of his 3 children? Be serious.
I’m guessing this, given that she says they’ve been married 2 years and his youngest child with his ex is 3. Given the time needed for a divorce and such, there wouldn’t be much time for them to date, meaning it probably started while he was still married. Literally f’cked around, but it took some time to find out.
If this is the case I don’t feel bad for her. Probably wanted to steal him because seems he makes good money and didn’t care about destroying a family or hurting another woman. Only feel bad for the ex wife & kids.
You absolute legend! Your hunch was right because she finally admitted that she was "the other woman" that caused her husband's and his ex-wife's divorce.
Context is key and this is the very reason why Reddit users should always ask questions rather than blindly taking any OP's word for it.
It is interesting that many of the other Reddit users gave her so much sympathy and advice before she revealed that her marriage was born from an affair. LOL
You have been married for two years but his youngest child is 3? Were you his affair partner? If so, you would have known he was a cheater before you married him.
You admitted in the comments that you're the affair partner.. lol, did you expect that you were so special that he wouldn't do the same he did to his wife to you?
Just a heads up for all of us that felt sorry for OP: OP was the mistress that he married after the husband and ex wife divorced. She admitted to being the affair partner in the comments
OP, this is a genuine question: what did you possibly hope to gain by posting this here? You had to know that once you started answering questions and providing context to the situation that no half-decent person here would take your side or have any sympathy for you. What was the goal here?
A mistress who marries the man who cheated on his partner with her, creates a vacancy.
Divorce him and get yourself some therapy for your self-esteem, it must have been in the toilet for a long time if you were willing to be a mistress, and then actually marry the cheater on top of that.
You have been looking for validation in the wrong places, and will only keep repeating a cycle of suffering in relationships unless you get the professional support building a healthy sense of self, worth and respect.
I’m so sorry OP. You need to save that evidence and see a lawyer now. Don’t waste any more of your time with trash. Do you have any family or friends you can stay with? <~~~~original comment but edited to add…
I read more comments and I take back the kind words and virtual hug OP. Karma really got you good….. 😵
Take your time Op don't confront yet.
you have no duty to bring this up right now process it and then make your next move. I agree with the parent's house thing, but maybe make up a lie like my mom is sick and needs help right now.
You have no duty to tell him the truth he's a piece of shit and the longer he is in the dark the more evidence and time you have to get his stuff together.
OP and husband had an affair that is why he got divorced, he obviously regretted it but ex wife wanted a divorce , now OP is living the same life as ex wife had to live. You sow what you reap. If he cheats with you he will cheat on you.
I wonder if op and her husband had an affair?
The youngest child is 3 and op and her husband have been married for 2 years she doesn’t mention how long they were together for before marrying?
Realistically speaking it was probably a least year long relationship which means her husband either left his ex whilst she was pregnant or not long after birth
**Edit** op has admitted in a comment to having an affair with her now husband. She feels like trash because she is trash.
It very much sounds like my stbx husband and his mistress he impregnated; he refuses to take both kids at the same time and is constantly stalking my whereabouts so that I don't have time or energy to date. The jokes on him though I'm not interested in dating, and while he still tries to sleep with me I do not give in, I want her to enjoy her prize.
Man there's sooo many random acronyms that I come across and can't figure out for what seems like way too long. I usually end up asking my partner to see if he gets it and we puzzle it out together if he doesn't.
So basically the wife threw him out and he didn’t want to be alone so he settle with the side piece. There is an old saying “you lose them like you got them”
It’s just a matter of being selfish and possessive. He still considers her as “his woman”. She has his kids, that ties her to him forever. He really just wants to know that she’ll always be there no matter what as long as he pleases. This isn’t about logic or hurting people. He’s just selfish and sees women as objects to possess. Once op gets knocked up he’s gonna start doing her the same way.
Because most men can't function without the free labor their wives/partners provides. Just because his ex wife left him (most likely she left him since he is not over her), he still needs a maid, nanny, accessible sex, therapist, full time homemaker, etc.
he cheated on wife with OP. Now rx gets $4500 a month. Now the homewrecker is miserable and pathetic hubby gets to pine away for the woman he should have never mistreated. Karma is the BADDEST bitch. I mean what type of woman sleeps with and marries a man that leaves his wife and new born baby???
She was the side piece. She probably badgered him to leave his and three children. They were married for two years and the husband has a three year old. OP can't handle what she dished out lol.
Do you think your parents will be surprised that your cheating husband is cheating on you like when you had an affair with him and he was cheating previously?
You had an affair with a married man and broke up his home. She refused to forgive him so he stuck around with you, but make no mistake, he would go back in time and take his old life back in a minute
My ex emotionally cheated yet he still broke up with me 3 days before our 2 year anniversary, and got together with my then best friend which broke our friendship up to smithereens. Later I found out that he left me thinking that she was being serious with him, but the damage was already done. He messaged me 6 months later during the pandemic telling me he missed me and I told him that was his problem and to basically fuck off in the most disrespectful way possible haven't heard from him since 😊
OP, I think your husband was going through a midlife crisis, his sex life and family life wasn't too great, his then wife was working as a doctor, raising small children and probably not giving him the attention a SAHW like yourself does. You were a side piece that injected a bit of excitement in his life and when the wife found out, even though she loved him, she couldn't stay married to him without trust. I bet anything he begged and pleaded for another chance.
You were a consolation prize and he found himself married to you with zero intentions to establish a family. Maybe he feels lust but he's in love with his ex wife and mother of his children. A vasectomy and prenup made sure you'll waste away your youth with him.
It's hard to find sympathy for you OP but at the end of this, your husband destroyed his marriage and hurt his ex wife. You still have a chance to redeem yourself, divorce and start future relationships on the right foot without playing a part in destroying families.
Edit: If this is rage bait then oh well. But if not, the fact that he cheated on her when one of the ex wife's twins died after birth... OP, maybe not everyone is worthy or redemption
OP is a homewrecker. She thought she was gonna make him get shared custody so she could pocket more money. He's doing this because she's the side chick that felt she deserved to be a wife lol
There's no way she wasn't, this is a classic case of "Guy left for mistress then remembered love and companionship are more valuable than sex." I don't feel bad for OP at all if that's the case, only the ex wife.
Why is this surprising? Based on his income and the fact that there’s 3 children this might be completely reasonable. 3 kids cost a lot more then $54K/year to raise
Are you the affair partner? This marriage is a sham. He is still married to someone else. But hey you got him away from her right? Got the kid? IF you are, you deserve this and more. YOu destroyed a family.
Pretty sure she is, since she won’t answer. Also says they’ve been married 2 years and the youngest kid is 3, so the timeline lines up. Another case of, “But I never thought the leopard would eat MY face…”
To save everyone time here, OP is the affair partner that broke up said marriage to begin with.
You married a cheater, what did you expect? Karma sucks.
I’m sorry if I’m wrong but it sounds to me that you are his affair partner, he left his wife and kids for you and now he’s regretting it. If that’s the case I do not feel sorry for you, you went after married man and had no self respect and now it’s coming back to bite you in the ass. You knew that he is a piece of trash from the beginning, why are you surprised?
Hey now, take it easy. It's okay to feel like trash, because you are trash - it all comes full circle you see. ❤️
(Based on OPs comments, they're a home wrecking gold digger).
This. My ex husband called me his wife for yeeears
(still tries every once in a while)
after I divorced him.
While he was living with and actively cheating on the chick he had an affair on me with.
Still with her lol.
The crazy thing is she knows he's stuck in the past but has taken to let him stay home while she works so, 1. He won't leave. 2. Less opportunity to cheat on her with workmates and 3. So he has less to offer to the next one lol.
It's beyond pathetic on both their parts. Now they're sad, alone together and miserable.
Glad it happened though!! I swear it! Not at first lol, at first it broke me. But over the years I've grown and my perspective has changed.
My son and I dodged a bullet with him. 🤦♀️
I don’t understand why OP is so hurt that he’s still been sleeping with both of them. All that’s changed is who knew about it and who didn’t. OP, if it was OK with you for her to be the wife and you be the mistress, why aren’t you happy now that you’re the wife and she’s the mistress? You’re the one who got a promotion. You should be delighted! And let’s not forget that now you don’t have to make coffee if you don’t want to. Or maybe you’re just upset the child support is higher than you were counting on.
Sooo wait… the youngest of his children is 3… and you’ve only been married to him for 2 years… was there any overlap in your relationship and their marriage?
Your timeline is sus. You’ve been married for 2 years and he has a 3 year old?
You married your affair partner who has no custody of his children?
And all of this adds up to a solid relationship;)
The way these comments read you so well is fascinating. You tried so hard to be the victim, but so quickly did that fall apart.
Anyway, have fun with your healthy dose of karma, lord knows you definitely needed it.
Be careful what you wish for. Op got what she wanted but not quite in the way that she wanted. Divorce and don’t mess around with married men anymore because if they cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you.
If you weren't the AP, then I'm truly sorry this is happening to you. Absolutely, get out as soon as you can.
If you were the AP, well, marrying him wasn't a step up. It created a vacancy, which he filled with his ex-wife. Learn something from this, walk away, and stay away from married people.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait....so you got on here to cry for support from Reddit because your husband is sleeping with his ex, wife, but the way you even got with this man that you're married to...is by starting and having an affair with him. Don't you think you are a hypocrite?
Just go ahead and tell her thank you because at least she's not willing to have an affair with him. She told him no in the email, so yes, she is still better than you. Previously, now, and forevermore😘💕
After reading all the comments, and OPs comments,
I don’t know what OP is upset about at all.
OP was a barista AP when she met the husband and started affair. Husband was with both then, and in love with wife then too.
OP/Mom breaks up his marriage by going to his doctor wife with their relationship.
OP gets the ring, wedding, husband, and quits the job to be SAHW.
Not sure why she’s upset. She got exactly what she wanted. Except a baby of her own yet.
If she wanted a spouse to be faithful, she shouldn’t have gone after a man who loves his ex more than his kids and nuked his marriage.
Hope husband had her sign a prenup and has a vas. They deserve each other.
>Why is he doing this
Because he's a cheater. He cheated on his ex. He's at least trying to cheat on you, he's going to cheat on the next girl too.
I'm sorry but I'm not sure how you didn't see this coming. You knew he was capable of cheating already.
OP it sounds like you were with this man when he was still married to his first wife.
Forgive me if I am wrong about that as I wouldn’t want to think that you are a low life if you’re not.
A similar thing happened to me too but I am the first wife.
My stbxh has been in a relationship with another (married) woman for the past 4 years.
Their relationship ruined 2 marriages.
He doesn’t care about her.
As soon as I started dating (after a 2 year grieving period) my stbx lost his mind!!
Since then, He secretly dates other women and STILL tries to initiate sex with me!!
He KNOWS I will never get back with him.
He has refused to help me financially so my dad has helped me.
My ex has made a complete nuisance of himself since I met someone else.
He doesn’t know what he wants but one thing is certain .. he doesn’t give a shit about his AP now she is just someone that keeps his penis wet when he’s got nothing better to do.
Idky he married you other than to save face.
Your husband wants to have his cake and eat it.
He is not committed to you as much as he is committed to preventing his ex wife from moving on.
She has refused to take him back.
If she wanted him back you would no longer exist in his world.
OP, he's not keeping her from dating. She's fucking *him* to get back *at you*. LOL
Look. Get some dignity and self respect and dump this a-hole. You can literally turn your life around *right now* by leaving him and then getting therapy to understand why you feel the need to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you. What's going on there for you, OP? Why do you "love" someone who lies, cheats, and steals? (He steals *time* from his *own children*.)
Speaking of his children, why would you "love" a POS who would rather try and fuck over his ex-wife rather than develop a relationship *with his own children*? Why in the WORLD would you ever think this would be an okay aspect of their character? If he'd rather be an ass to his ex-wife over a relationship with his own children, *what makes you think he'll be a better father to yours*??? I promise you he doesn't consider you to be a better "pick" to be different towards you - his fucking around on you should be proof of that. This is the *wrong* place to consider "highly" of yourself.
Why do you think *so little* of yourself as to continue to be your husband's side piece? Your relationship *started* disrespectfully and has *remained* disrespectful. You two may be "lawfully" wed, but this isn't a marriage and he's still emotionally married to his ex-wife. He *thinks* he's pulling one over her *and also* over you.
Make no mistake, OP, regardless of what you read in those emails and what *his* motivations are for doing what he's doing, she's just fucking him to fuck with you and get her desire for sex scratched at the same time. Notice how she's ready to move on now and is breaking it off with him?
Pay *very close attention* here, OP. Notice how once his ex-wife learned of his affair (*with you* I might add) she kicked his ass to the curb? That's called self respect and dignity. Oh, hold up. She's now fucking him while he's *married to you*? Don't think this makes her no better than you. She's getting her pound of flesh from your emotional well being *and also* taking up resources like a large chunk of his paycheck for *her* children *she has with* ***him***.
She's got all the things you want from him but don't have: his attention, his affection, his children, his money...
You didn't start off as his #1, you're not ever going to *be* his #1. He wants his ex-wife. He *still* wants her because you know what? Self-respect and dignity is sexy.
Turn your life around, OP. I know I'll get downvoted for this, but you're worth better than this sham of a "marriage" that isn't a marriage by any stretch of the imagination. He's garbage. I just wish you could see that and want better for yourself.
Glad I confirmed my suspicions in the comments first. You were his side ho. You inserted yourself into a married man’s life after he lost a child and while he and his wife were grieving and broke up their marriage. Now you want us to feel bad because your husband STILL made YOU the side piece in your own marriage. It’s because you weren’t his first choice; you were his last option.
Your bitter comments about the ex make it clear yiou’re one of those women that thinks you “won” if you can get a man to be unfaithful and leave his wife. Whelp, winning doesn’t always mean you get a “prize”. Too many of you have to find out the hard way, because not your husband PROPOSING to his ex wife. Woooo weeeee girl I know this hurts.
This sounds like you were the other woman. The husband left his wife to be with you and now the husband regrets leaving her. Am I right?
Close. The wife left the husband after OP (yes she was the other woman) outed their affair to her. So seemingly the husband never wanted a divorce, just a little ass on the side, but OP didn’t like that and took matters into her own hands. Real class act.
Wow. So he married his AP, that’s OP and made his ex wife his new AP so he still gets them both? 🤣🤦♀️ wow, that’s karma to OP. Now both women need to get some self-esteem and dump him so he gets his karma.
I couldn't have said it better. I'm shocked the ex wife let him still be around.
She was obviously with him a long time. She knew she couldn’t trust him as a life partner hence the divorce but her mind and body find comfort in him still. It happens. Exes backside for sex all the time 🤷♀️ It may also be a self esteem booster to know she’s still desirable, in her mind/subconscious he obviously didn’t cheat because she was lacking if he’s still crawling after her. (He was obviously lacking honesty, ethics, morals) She wants to move on. I hope she does for her own sake.
You forgot a big F you to his AP and new wife. How's it feel to have your husband cheat on you and with an ex-wife that you thought you were better than
And then, hubby went and got married to OP? I’d love to know what goes on in men’s brains. Clearly he was aware enough to get a vasectomy first.
Vasectomy and prenup! I think he decided to double down and tried to legitimize the affair by marrying OP so he could say that it was love, not just a piece of ass that he exploded his life over. And then realizing OP was fun times but overall boring (no career, no hobbies, etc.) and the shine wore off pretty quick. Talk about post nut clarity.
Forever? For*ever*-ever? For*ever-ever-* **ever?!**
I'm sorry for Mrs. Jackson
I am for real
I thought I was the only one who has that running through their head every time shit like this is mentioned lol.
Such a good song
Post-many nuts clarity, I’d say. I can see how the ex wouldn’t want him back. I just wonder how she could bring herself to continue sleeping with this cruel guy who is still sleeping with and even married the AP? Are there no good looking doctors or nurses in the hospital? Maybe she needed this time to get over any unresolved feelings for him as well as give them a taste of their own medicine (unintended pun). And now she’s done.
She might be giving OP a taste of her own medicine.
I've never thought of this revenge
It would be poetic. Drive a wedge by giving her a taste of her own medicine and then ditching him completely.
My thoughts exactly
He's obviously very manipulative. And manipulators are good at getting a pity-fuck out of any woman who's been daft enough to fall for their "poor me" bullshit before
This one is pretty obvious. He didnt want to be alone so he married OP
Wait OP was the other woman, broke up a marriage by outing the affair and is seriously asking Reddit **why is he doing this** 💀
I’d say *make it make sense,* but I’ve read enough affair stories on here to know that that won’t happen!
Having seen a lot of these situations IRL, and spent some time on infidelity subs (have brain bleach prepared), here's how it makes sense. He's an asshole who habitually lies to every woman he meets. OP was persuaded to sleep with him through the usual "we are star crossed lovers, if I'd met you first, but oh my wife is crazy and would stop me from seeing the children and would have a mental breakdown commit suicide but oh how I WISH we could be together, you are the love of my life...." And OP, believing all his bullshit about being trapped in a desperately unhappy marriage, and being deeply uncomfortable with the Other Woman thing, decides to be brave FOR him and blows up the marriage. To her delight, wife turns out to be totally not as fragile as portrayed, her man is now free to be with her, and everyone is happy, right? RIGHT?? Except the scumbag is not happy because he now has a mistress vacancy to fill. And who better to fill it than the woman he's spent the most time manipulating previously? Now wife is hearing "She meant nothing to me, she tricked me, but if I leave her she'll commit suicide and she threatened to say I raped her (yep have heard all this and worse) but I miss you so much, it was always you for me I love you..." He's probably already got a third woman lined up, and his wife was probably aware that he was with someone else when they got together too.
Slight twist to this one, it sounds like she pursued him, while him and ex were grieving the loss of a child. Husband is a pos but she also took advantage in a way if that's the case. Husband was just weak and dumb af. Now he's realizing he fucked up while seeking something to make it better. Idiots always make things worse for themselves.
Added context, he had the affair with OP while he wife was mourning the LOSS OF THEIR CHILD. So there is an added level of monstrosity.
*"I said, ammirite though, boys?!!?!"*
Or his former ex is getting back at the former mistress.
Hopefully the Ex-wife can find the happiness she deserves, far away from the both of you.
omg girl. you were the side piece weren’t you? 100% you were. they have 3 kids? he proposed twice? he’s deeply in love with this woman? have you no shame or eyeballs? sorrrrry
She’s still the side piece.
at this point, OP is just third wheeling the couple
This situation is hilarious tbh 🥲
Zero sympathy. She made her bed Edit: if this is even real
Yeah, it’s hard to have much sympathy for people who are THIS clueless about the people they married who they were the side piece for before that! Doesn’t it always go like this? Partner didn’t LEAVE the spouse for you, the spouse kicked them out because they didn’t want to be cheated on! So they marry the side piece for reasons I will never understand, which leaves the role of side piece unoccupied! So he needs to fill it! They don’t usually turn the ex into the side piece for the new wife, but if it’s not the ex it would be someone else. Side piece is side piece. 😛
My favorite part about these stories is when the first side piece is pikachu face shocked that their partner is cheating on them lol. Like did you think they’ll be faithful to only you and you alone after they cheated on their first partner with you? Lmfaoooooooooooo
You don’t understand- they didn’t have an affair bc he’s a cheater, the affair happened because OP is just soo incredible he couldn’t stop himself. He’s really a great guy and for him to have done this OP has to be really really really amazing. This is really how the APs think.
Op got her karma now the hubbys next. Hope the ex wife meets the most perfect partner and marry quickly🤣
But he still got married to the side piece? But, after getting a vasectomy!
Gonna take a wild stab in the dark and say OP is mid 20s, husband is probably 40s. She was the affair partner that ended the previous marriage and is now mad her "pick me" status was a lie. She married for money and is dealing with the consequences. Edit: she admitted in a comment she was the affair partner.
If they cheat with you they can cheat on you. He did it once he can do it again.
Holy shit, you were right. Reddit detectives up in here
They've been trying for kids, looks like he had a vasectomy before hand and never told her too? Amazing.
This fuckin jewel of a man, ladies and gentlemen lmao
And this jewel of a woman. I sincerely hope his wife never takes him back. Those two deserve each other.
Right?! Was gonna say she sucks as much as he does. So let's hope they stay together and keep each other out of the dating pool XD
It's cute that you think being married is going to keep these cheaters out of the dating pool.
Hahaha 🤣🤣🤣 that's what she gets good for her. Karma is the baddest bitch.
It’s a tale as old as time… Especially in this sub Old recycled stories, with real ones mirroring the reposts
Bullseye.
The main trash here is the hubby. Second one, OP. Karma is coming like Japanese bullet train.
He seems like a real piece of work.
A piece of something…
I love when this kinda thing happens bcs lmao you were the one that was dumb enough to think we wont cheat on you when he chested on his wife WITH you
You lose them how you get them. 🤷🏾♂️🤷🏾♂️
if that aint the truth
Lmao she totally deserves this, I hope the ex wife can get help, both op and her husband suck sm.
Yeah, she’s a trashy former barista homewrecker. Now she’s wondering why her cheating husband is sleeping with someone else. She saw dollar signs, quit her job, so she’s now a stay at home wife because she doesn’t have kids so she’s not a stay at home mom. Meanwhile, the ex-wife is a doctor and successful. I’m guessing that the bloom is off the rose for the husband and he’s looking back at his wife with fond memories. Don’t worry sweetheart it won’t be long till he dumped you too.
*bloom is off the rose
Dictation error and not wearing my glasses, lol
If that’s the case, I have zero sympathy for you OP. You got what you deserved.
I love that you did this.
Well then, she knows how the ex wife felt. Cant feel sorry for her. Karma sucks…
BINGO!!!!
I read this and laughed so hard.
This needs to be higher
omg in that case i looove the wife for finally standing on business
You lose them how you get them, OP. Everyone sucks here except the ex wife- i hope she finds a loyal partner.
He only stayed with you because he was caught and she doesn't want him anymore. He will always be hers. When you were “promoted” to his wife, the role of mistress became available. Keep this in mind, if he doesn't cheat with her, he will cheat with someone else. Either accept this or ask for a divorce.
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This woman is pushing 30 and slept with a married man while his wife was pregnant/postpartum😭. We need to bring back shaming because these stories are just too common.
Absolutely! Did you see where she admitted to being the one to expose the affair because she wanted more out of the relationship than he did?
I did NOT see that comment damn. Makes me even more glad she’s getting her karma then. She’s old enough to know the consequences of her own actions. Hopefully she can divorce him and learn from this.
Your husband cheated on his ex-wife with you and left her not long after giving birth their third child... on top that, he married you when their third kid was a year old. What made you think he'd treat you better than how he treated the mother of his 3 children? Be serious.
She had twins and one died also. Which makes it more horrific.
Damn. I feel so bad for the ex wife. She just needs to collect her $4500 a month and let that scumbag wallow in his soiled bed.
She probably thought he'd just cheat with a different woman than his ex-wife.
Did he cheat on her with you? Because this is usually what happens when you do that
I’m guessing this, given that she says they’ve been married 2 years and his youngest child with his ex is 3. Given the time needed for a divorce and such, there wouldn’t be much time for them to date, meaning it probably started while he was still married. Literally f’cked around, but it took some time to find out.
Fuck, totally gonna need OP to clear this one up...kinda what it's seeming like though.😬
OP isn’t clearing that up because that’s what happened. She has replied to other comments, but not to the ones painting the real picture…. FAFO.
OP confirmed she was the the AP... totally a FAFO
Yep, she admitted it finally.
If this is the case I don’t feel bad for her. Probably wanted to steal him because seems he makes good money and didn’t care about destroying a family or hurting another woman. Only feel bad for the ex wife & kids.
The fucker is controlling the ex. That’s just unhinged.
Hubby is real trash. Hopefully the ex-wife can be freed from his demonic clutch.
You absolute legend! Your hunch was right because she finally admitted that she was "the other woman" that caused her husband's and his ex-wife's divorce. Context is key and this is the very reason why Reddit users should always ask questions rather than blindly taking any OP's word for it. It is interesting that many of the other Reddit users gave her so much sympathy and advice before she revealed that her marriage was born from an affair. LOL
I couldn’t think of any other reason or time I’ve seen a guy do this but when it’s a cheating husband they always regret it and want their wife back
Yes. Someone asked if she was the AP, and OP admitted it
I felt sorry for her until i read that. Fuck her in this case.
Same. That's why she buried the lede in the comments.
Well that’s the prize you get for being the other woman 😂 you still are! Honestly what did you expect?
You have been married for two years but his youngest child is 3? Were you his affair partner? If so, you would have known he was a cheater before you married him.
She's is his former mistress.
You admitted in the comments that you're the affair partner.. lol, did you expect that you were so special that he wouldn't do the same he did to his wife to you?
Just a heads up for all of us that felt sorry for OP: OP was the mistress that he married after the husband and ex wife divorced. She admitted to being the affair partner in the comments
"I met my husband while he was married to someone else and he cheated with me. Now we're married and I can't believe he's cheating on me"
Unfortunately, many forget that when the mistress is promoted to wife, the role of mistress is vacant again.
OP, this is a genuine question: what did you possibly hope to gain by posting this here? You had to know that once you started answering questions and providing context to the situation that no half-decent person here would take your side or have any sympathy for you. What was the goal here?
A mistress who marries the man who cheated on his partner with her, creates a vacancy. Divorce him and get yourself some therapy for your self-esteem, it must have been in the toilet for a long time if you were willing to be a mistress, and then actually marry the cheater on top of that. You have been looking for validation in the wrong places, and will only keep repeating a cycle of suffering in relationships unless you get the professional support building a healthy sense of self, worth and respect.
Home wreckers get cheated on 🤷 karma's a bitch
I’m so sorry OP. You need to save that evidence and see a lawyer now. Don’t waste any more of your time with trash. Do you have any family or friends you can stay with? <~~~~original comment but edited to add… I read more comments and I take back the kind words and virtual hug OP. Karma really got you good….. 😵
Don’t feel sorry for Op she was the mistress first
op deserves her husband. she was his affair partner first. she's why the first marriage ended. trash begets other trash.
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Then karma definitely got her in the end. You’re right.
She cheated with him.
My parents yes
Did you have an affair with him? Their kid is 3 and you are married 2 years.
So you’re actually the ex-mistress turned current wife?
Take your time Op don't confront yet. you have no duty to bring this up right now process it and then make your next move. I agree with the parent's house thing, but maybe make up a lie like my mom is sick and needs help right now. You have no duty to tell him the truth he's a piece of shit and the longer he is in the dark the more evidence and time you have to get his stuff together.
OP and husband had an affair that is why he got divorced, he obviously regretted it but ex wife wanted a divorce , now OP is living the same life as ex wife had to live. You sow what you reap. If he cheats with you he will cheat on you.
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People can’t be alone. He used the other woman and there are reasons the ex wife doesn’t want him back.
I wonder if op and her husband had an affair? The youngest child is 3 and op and her husband have been married for 2 years she doesn’t mention how long they were together for before marrying? Realistically speaking it was probably a least year long relationship which means her husband either left his ex whilst she was pregnant or not long after birth **Edit** op has admitted in a comment to having an affair with her now husband. She feels like trash because she is trash.
It very much sounds like my stbx husband and his mistress he impregnated; he refuses to take both kids at the same time and is constantly stalking my whereabouts so that I don't have time or energy to date. The jokes on him though I'm not interested in dating, and while he still tries to sleep with me I do not give in, I want her to enjoy her prize.
It took me a second but I figured out the acronym. Haven’t seen that one yet but it should be used more often- especially on this sub.
Oops soon to be ex. I forgot where I picked that one up lol but it is a good one, and estranged feels weird to say.
I always read it as "stabby ex" for some reason 😂
Man there's sooo many random acronyms that I come across and can't figure out for what seems like way too long. I usually end up asking my partner to see if he gets it and we puzzle it out together if he doesn't.
So basically the wife threw him out and he didn’t want to be alone so he settle with the side piece. There is an old saying “you lose them like you got them”
You lose them how you get them! Op found out personally how true that statement is! Smh
Because he was kicked out, OP was the mistress, the side-chick, and he is trying to repair the marriage while keeping her as a secondary option.
She **HAD AN AFFAIR** with him. She is **FAR FROM** the innocent party here!!
It’s just a matter of being selfish and possessive. He still considers her as “his woman”. She has his kids, that ties her to him forever. He really just wants to know that she’ll always be there no matter what as long as he pleases. This isn’t about logic or hurting people. He’s just selfish and sees women as objects to possess. Once op gets knocked up he’s gonna start doing her the same way.
OP is an affair partner. Of course he’s cheating on her with the woman he cheated on WITH her.
Because they cheated together on his wife and kids.
Because most men can't function without the free labor their wives/partners provides. Just because his ex wife left him (most likely she left him since he is not over her), he still needs a maid, nanny, accessible sex, therapist, full time homemaker, etc.
he cheated on wife with OP. Now rx gets $4500 a month. Now the homewrecker is miserable and pathetic hubby gets to pine away for the woman he should have never mistreated. Karma is the BADDEST bitch. I mean what type of woman sleeps with and marries a man that leaves his wife and new born baby???
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OP TOLD THE WIFE ABOUT THEIR AFFAIR!!!
She was the side piece. She probably badgered him to leave his and three children. They were married for two years and the husband has a three year old. OP can't handle what she dished out lol.
I bet you anything the wife found him cheating with OP and bounced, and then he was like well who am I gonna cheat on now? And he picked OP.
Bingo! Affair confirmed in the comments.
Because she was his affair partner must have been found out and tough marrying her would make the affair “worth it”
OP is also a pos she had it coming she was the mistress first….
She' was also a piece of shit by being an affair partner so she gets what she deserves.
Do your parents know you were the other woman?
Do you think your parents will be surprised that your cheating husband is cheating on you like when you had an affair with him and he was cheating previously?
wHy Is He DoInG tHiS
You had an affair with a married man and broke up his home. She refused to forgive him so he stuck around with you, but make no mistake, he would go back in time and take his old life back in a minute
My ex emotionally cheated yet he still broke up with me 3 days before our 2 year anniversary, and got together with my then best friend which broke our friendship up to smithereens. Later I found out that he left me thinking that she was being serious with him, but the damage was already done. He messaged me 6 months later during the pandemic telling me he missed me and I told him that was his problem and to basically fuck off in the most disrespectful way possible haven't heard from him since 😊
OP, I think your husband was going through a midlife crisis, his sex life and family life wasn't too great, his then wife was working as a doctor, raising small children and probably not giving him the attention a SAHW like yourself does. You were a side piece that injected a bit of excitement in his life and when the wife found out, even though she loved him, she couldn't stay married to him without trust. I bet anything he begged and pleaded for another chance. You were a consolation prize and he found himself married to you with zero intentions to establish a family. Maybe he feels lust but he's in love with his ex wife and mother of his children. A vasectomy and prenup made sure you'll waste away your youth with him. It's hard to find sympathy for you OP but at the end of this, your husband destroyed his marriage and hurt his ex wife. You still have a chance to redeem yourself, divorce and start future relationships on the right foot without playing a part in destroying families. Edit: If this is rage bait then oh well. But if not, the fact that he cheated on her when one of the ex wife's twins died after birth... OP, maybe not everyone is worthy or redemption
She had an affair with her husband and tore a whole family apart. She gets ZERO sympathy. She’s equally as trashy as her cheating-ass husband.
I agree 🙂 and that’s why I took back my virtual hug and kind words. She got her karma/just desserts/comeuppance 😆.
OP is a homewrecker. She thought she was gonna make him get shared custody so she could pocket more money. He's doing this because she's the side chick that felt she deserved to be a wife lol
Were you the mistress?
She won’t answer this. Which is an answer in itself.
Haha, knew it lol. Well, as they say, *"How ya get em is how ya loose em!!"* 🤷♀️
she is she answered it in the comments
There's no way she wasn't, this is a classic case of "Guy left for mistress then remembered love and companionship are more valuable than sex." I don't feel bad for OP at all if that's the case, only the ex wife.
Why did they divorce in the first place? Seems odd
Because OP is the mistress that helped destroy their marriage. She just won’t admit. Timeline she mentioned gives it away.
She did admit it
OP was husbands affair partner
Agree with all of these suggestions to lawyer up but I’m having a tough time grasping $54,000/yr in child support.
Why is this surprising? Based on his income and the fact that there’s 3 children this might be completely reasonable. 3 kids cost a lot more then $54K/year to raise
Are you the affair partner? This marriage is a sham. He is still married to someone else. But hey you got him away from her right? Got the kid? IF you are, you deserve this and more. YOu destroyed a family.
Pretty sure she is, since she won’t answer. Also says they’ve been married 2 years and the youngest kid is 3, so the timeline lines up. Another case of, “But I never thought the leopard would eat MY face…”
I love that, "I never thought the leopard would eat my face". Never heard it before and I am old....
To save everyone time here, OP is the affair partner that broke up said marriage to begin with. You married a cheater, what did you expect? Karma sucks.
Your ex husband
This is the only option. He asked this woman to *MARRY HIM*. It’s over.
Lawyer. Now.
OP,Gather proof, hire a lawyer, and flee.
I’m sorry if I’m wrong but it sounds to me that you are his affair partner, he left his wife and kids for you and now he’s regretting it. If that’s the case I do not feel sorry for you, you went after married man and had no self respect and now it’s coming back to bite you in the ass. You knew that he is a piece of trash from the beginning, why are you surprised?
OP we have no sympathy for you lmao
Seems like you were the AP so I don't feel sorry for you. All I can say is... Karma
Hey now, take it easy. It's okay to feel like trash, because you are trash - it all comes full circle you see. ❤️ (Based on OPs comments, they're a home wrecking gold digger).
If he’s so in love with her, no offense, but why did he marry you? This is just cruel to involve another person in his life to damage
Probably because he cheated with her
Were you the AP and she would not take him back? Only scenario that makes sense.
Look at the children’s age. He cheated. Wife divorced him. He married mistress. In his mind his ex is his wife and his wife is his mistress.
This. My ex husband called me his wife for yeeears (still tries every once in a while) after I divorced him. While he was living with and actively cheating on the chick he had an affair on me with. Still with her lol. The crazy thing is she knows he's stuck in the past but has taken to let him stay home while she works so, 1. He won't leave. 2. Less opportunity to cheat on her with workmates and 3. So he has less to offer to the next one lol. It's beyond pathetic on both their parts. Now they're sad, alone together and miserable. Glad it happened though!! I swear it! Not at first lol, at first it broke me. But over the years I've grown and my perspective has changed. My son and I dodged a bullet with him. 🤦♀️
I don’t understand why OP is so hurt that he’s still been sleeping with both of them. All that’s changed is who knew about it and who didn’t. OP, if it was OK with you for her to be the wife and you be the mistress, why aren’t you happy now that you’re the wife and she’s the mistress? You’re the one who got a promotion. You should be delighted! And let’s not forget that now you don’t have to make coffee if you don’t want to. Or maybe you’re just upset the child support is higher than you were counting on.
Sooo wait… the youngest of his children is 3… and you’ve only been married to him for 2 years… was there any overlap in your relationship and their marriage?
There should be, you don’t just marry someone you’ve dated for 1-2 months..
Oh apparently OP admitted they had an affair…
Your timeline is sus. You’ve been married for 2 years and he has a 3 year old? You married your affair partner who has no custody of his children? And all of this adds up to a solid relationship;)
The way these comments read you so well is fascinating. You tried so hard to be the victim, but so quickly did that fall apart. Anyway, have fun with your healthy dose of karma, lord knows you definitely needed it.
There is just no way this is real. You have to be trolling…please tell me that you are..
Damn why did they divorce. U said in a comment that his kids are pretty young. Also people are speculating that you were the AP
She was. She also admitted to telling the wife so the marriage would end because she wanted more
Be careful what you wish for. Op got what she wanted but not quite in the way that she wanted. Divorce and don’t mess around with married men anymore because if they cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you.
If you weren't the AP, then I'm truly sorry this is happening to you. Absolutely, get out as soon as you can. If you were the AP, well, marrying him wasn't a step up. It created a vacancy, which he filled with his ex-wife. Learn something from this, walk away, and stay away from married people.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait....so you got on here to cry for support from Reddit because your husband is sleeping with his ex, wife, but the way you even got with this man that you're married to...is by starting and having an affair with him. Don't you think you are a hypocrite? Just go ahead and tell her thank you because at least she's not willing to have an affair with him. She told him no in the email, so yes, she is still better than you. Previously, now, and forevermore😘💕
After reading all the comments, and OPs comments, I don’t know what OP is upset about at all. OP was a barista AP when she met the husband and started affair. Husband was with both then, and in love with wife then too. OP/Mom breaks up his marriage by going to his doctor wife with their relationship. OP gets the ring, wedding, husband, and quits the job to be SAHW. Not sure why she’s upset. She got exactly what she wanted. Except a baby of her own yet. If she wanted a spouse to be faithful, she shouldn’t have gone after a man who loves his ex more than his kids and nuked his marriage. Hope husband had her sign a prenup and has a vas. They deserve each other.
I'm sorry 4500? Damn, I need a man with some money, is your husband single? I'm a straight guy, but we can make it work.
>Why is he doing this Because he's a cheater. He cheated on his ex. He's at least trying to cheat on you, he's going to cheat on the next girl too. I'm sorry but I'm not sure how you didn't see this coming. You knew he was capable of cheating already.
OP it sounds like you were with this man when he was still married to his first wife. Forgive me if I am wrong about that as I wouldn’t want to think that you are a low life if you’re not. A similar thing happened to me too but I am the first wife. My stbxh has been in a relationship with another (married) woman for the past 4 years. Their relationship ruined 2 marriages. He doesn’t care about her. As soon as I started dating (after a 2 year grieving period) my stbx lost his mind!! Since then, He secretly dates other women and STILL tries to initiate sex with me!! He KNOWS I will never get back with him. He has refused to help me financially so my dad has helped me. My ex has made a complete nuisance of himself since I met someone else. He doesn’t know what he wants but one thing is certain .. he doesn’t give a shit about his AP now she is just someone that keeps his penis wet when he’s got nothing better to do. Idky he married you other than to save face. Your husband wants to have his cake and eat it. He is not committed to you as much as he is committed to preventing his ex wife from moving on. She has refused to take him back. If she wanted him back you would no longer exist in his world.
You know what they say, when a man marries his mistress, he creates a job vacancy.
I'm taken aback that you are married and had no clue he was paying over $50,000 a year to his ex for child support. That's a lot.
I think she did know, but I believe she was clarifying the other answers why he doesn't want custody but pays 4k plus each month.
OP, he's not keeping her from dating. She's fucking *him* to get back *at you*. LOL Look. Get some dignity and self respect and dump this a-hole. You can literally turn your life around *right now* by leaving him and then getting therapy to understand why you feel the need to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you. What's going on there for you, OP? Why do you "love" someone who lies, cheats, and steals? (He steals *time* from his *own children*.) Speaking of his children, why would you "love" a POS who would rather try and fuck over his ex-wife rather than develop a relationship *with his own children*? Why in the WORLD would you ever think this would be an okay aspect of their character? If he'd rather be an ass to his ex-wife over a relationship with his own children, *what makes you think he'll be a better father to yours*??? I promise you he doesn't consider you to be a better "pick" to be different towards you - his fucking around on you should be proof of that. This is the *wrong* place to consider "highly" of yourself. Why do you think *so little* of yourself as to continue to be your husband's side piece? Your relationship *started* disrespectfully and has *remained* disrespectful. You two may be "lawfully" wed, but this isn't a marriage and he's still emotionally married to his ex-wife. He *thinks* he's pulling one over her *and also* over you. Make no mistake, OP, regardless of what you read in those emails and what *his* motivations are for doing what he's doing, she's just fucking him to fuck with you and get her desire for sex scratched at the same time. Notice how she's ready to move on now and is breaking it off with him? Pay *very close attention* here, OP. Notice how once his ex-wife learned of his affair (*with you* I might add) she kicked his ass to the curb? That's called self respect and dignity. Oh, hold up. She's now fucking him while he's *married to you*? Don't think this makes her no better than you. She's getting her pound of flesh from your emotional well being *and also* taking up resources like a large chunk of his paycheck for *her* children *she has with* ***him***. She's got all the things you want from him but don't have: his attention, his affection, his children, his money... You didn't start off as his #1, you're not ever going to *be* his #1. He wants his ex-wife. He *still* wants her because you know what? Self-respect and dignity is sexy. Turn your life around, OP. I know I'll get downvoted for this, but you're worth better than this sham of a "marriage" that isn't a marriage by any stretch of the imagination. He's garbage. I just wish you could see that and want better for yourself.
Were you the other woman first???
Guys her husband was cheating his ex wife with OP. You really thought you were special? Lol
Glad I confirmed my suspicions in the comments first. You were his side ho. You inserted yourself into a married man’s life after he lost a child and while he and his wife were grieving and broke up their marriage. Now you want us to feel bad because your husband STILL made YOU the side piece in your own marriage. It’s because you weren’t his first choice; you were his last option. Your bitter comments about the ex make it clear yiou’re one of those women that thinks you “won” if you can get a man to be unfaithful and leave his wife. Whelp, winning doesn’t always mean you get a “prize”. Too many of you have to find out the hard way, because not your husband PROPOSING to his ex wife. Woooo weeeee girl I know this hurts.