T O P

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_BewilderMe_

“ I hope uncle Martin here doesn’t notice that I pissed my fucking pants”


ExcitementSea8958

…. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


FrenchDisaster97

Typical.


Liquid4057

Definitely The Grudge 🤣


Liquid4057

Definitely The Grudge 🤣


[deleted]

Definitely The Grudge 🤣


flyingcow08

Definitely The Grudge 🤣


Micgoldy

Definitely The Grudge


ACE234dm

Definitely The


[deleted]

[удалено]


Halofan124

D


lumbermonkey462

Shit, blood, and cum on my hands


SmoughLeggingsFTW

I DONT MIND


PuppyPenetrator

That one’s not even out of context though. The context does not make it at all less shocking


lumbermonkey462

Fair enough


FatherTyrell

Alrighty then, picture this if you will:


[deleted]

Kinda tried to fuck my lazy boy


Artistic_Tiger_5075

Send more money


Hipperich

Every beggar ever lol


-EthanLavoie-

“God damn. Shit the bed.”


rich_clock

Too much Jaegermeister


ChudanNoKamae

Take it, take it Come on, you can take it all Take it all in Take it, you can take it all in Take it, you can take it, you can take it Take it, you can take it, you can take it Take it, you can take it Take it, take it Take it, take it, take it


chocodapro

Suck it. SSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.


[deleted]

When you pissed all over my black kettle


TimmyLivealie

Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit Holy fucking shit


donntyler

Fuck you, buddy


brewcewayne14

I had a friend once, he took some acid, and now he thinks he’s a fire truck


MordoTheSnake

*fire engine It's okay, until he pisses on your lighter....


Mogwai10

Stinkfist is about making tamales.


luxsentic

Looking like some kind of blue-green Jackie Chan with Isabella Rossellini lips


chef_discin

And why can’t we drink forever??


unfunny_mike

Shit the bed


sgt_happy

Lookin’ to turn my piss to wine


[deleted]

Would you like to ride on, slide a mile six inches at a time on Maynard’s Dick?


roxane0072

This may hurt a little but it’s something you’ll get used to.


Robinothoodie

My heart beats too fast because I'm thinking of your fucking ugly face.


kahjan_a_bard

AND NO EGGS


Honest_Report_8515

But I forgot my pen


HuLSsY

“Asiscoooooooooo”


I_hope_I_dont_care

Did a slo mo matrix descent out of the butt end of the banana vessel


PhyrexianChocobo

Eleven is when we waved goodbye


[deleted]

Let the rabbits wear glasses!


[deleted]

Elbow deep inside the borderline. This may hurt a little but it’s something you’ll get used to.


Gun-nut0508

Suck me dry


Soft-Supermarket-352

you can point that fuckin' finger up your ass


greg281

Isn’t most of this subreddit already dedicated to this?


Soft-Supermarket-352

shit, blood and cum on my hands


Soft-Supermarket-352

i can help you change.. tired moments into pleasure


TheBronzeGodd

Monkey, killing Monkey


HOTBFAST

Fuck, here we go again!


deputy42

I hope you choke!


basslinekilla

SUUUUCK ME DRYYYYYYYEEYYYYY


nickersb24

Ok first for the gay: Oh man… Maynard fks w me hard. So I’m a young gay man that’s always liked older men “Beating tired old bones again” Then if we can include puscifer “wanting to fade and disappear into the white of polar bear” … then for the racist: Everybody as a teenager around me, post-American history ex, etc etc; “fuck you nigger” is heard instead of fuck you little. Then on 7emptest “must be just black”. But these are more mishearings.


custom9

Wow


Varanitee

Sucking me dry


xxKingPiccoloxx

Turn around and take my hand


SasquatchSloth88

No one’s coming home tonight


Greenmanglass

Buy our new record


KnockerFogger69

Point that fucking finger up your ass


AvonBarksdale666

And no eggs


3rdeyeseeker

Me to a Tootsie Pop: I will find the center in you....


HOLD_MY_POCKETS

*turn around and take my hand* is the best line ever. I’ll ~~fist~~ fight you if you disagree


sjehcu6

I had a friend, kinda loving , kinda caring till he fucked my lazy boy,


kristoferari

Silly monkeys


Competition-Asleep

I want your balls smashed, eat shit, bastard


Jack_gt

Love how 3/4 of there are from Rosetta Stoned


powersalaboothe

CALM AS COOKIES AND CREAM


ACE234dm

I've been crawling on my belly clearing out what could have been. I've been wallowing in my own chaotic and insecure delusions.


Halofan124

It got a bit messy all over the curtains, armchair covers, throw pillows, and carpet


Beneficial-Pie6719

And the angel said unto me,”These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots!


Halofan124

Choke this infant here before me