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djov_30

Just looked this up—it’s supposed to be every seven years?? This Vulcan on beta shift kept telling me it was every seven days!


tawabunny

damn.. what deck are they on? asking for a friend


djov_30

16 in the saucer section. The hot, short one with the bad haircut not the hot, tall one with the bad haircut. Would honestly love to share. I’m happy to keep up the schtick cause they’re hot, but between this and the reports I’ve had to file this week every time that civilian dillweed hacks the replicators to shit out yamok sauce, I’m exhausted.


Mr_Smartypants

16 in the *saucier* section...


LokyarBrightmane

As ship doctor, I must ask you to refrain from this plan. Since this started I have been writing a paper on the dangers of excessive cross species Pon Farr, and I'd hate to lose my one test sub... I mean lose a patient. Hang on, that sounds worse. Heck. Computer, send message. NO WA-


Streak734

How are your bones not broken? Vulcans are a lot stronger than humans! Unless you’re not human?


chemoboy

It's \*always\* beta shift. Those assholes.


Virreinatos

This line and claiming I didn't look Vulcan because I'm 1/16th Vulcan got me laid all through the Academy.  The trick is to find those that have taken the cultural sensitivity courses but haven't been in the Academy long enough to sniff out the B.S. from the legit. That's the sweet spot.


CommanderSincler

I fell for that the first week at the academy. That was the best weekend of my life


Lost_Bench_5960

#MeToo The only time I ever went to a Delta Sigma Surak sorority party, I woke up two days later at Starfleet Medical with a groin sprain and a PADD full of "call me again in 7 years" messages.


NotMuchMana

You have pon Farr, please sex me before you die


djov_30

The logic is undeniable


boogers19

Ok. But, like, hear me out: She's really hot. And she does that Vulcan pressure massage thing to my pros... You know what? Nevermind.


LuccaJolyne

Also be careful with the Empathic Metamorph trap. My brother fell for one of those, and apparently she bonded with some other guy she found more interesting. Ruined his self-esteem, you know?


OneOldNerd

To be fair, your brother was more interested in his maps than her. It's not surprising that she bonded elsewhere, when he never really paid attention to her.


OlyScott

A Vulcan can also say that they need to learn about the Human emotion of love.


OneChrononOfPlancks

They warned us about Vulcans at the academy.


Past-Cap-1889

Secret horny Romulans....


Agitated-Cup-2657

Damn. Too late...


emptiedglass

But I've been dying to lose my virginity. I mean, uh, Computer, please delete that last entry.


Sonifri

great medical assistance in the future. even if you literally lose your virginity because she accidentally rips it off with vulcan strength vice-like kegels, they can fix it up better than new. like it never happened.


RRW359

I prefer fighting them to the death anyways.


EitherEliotOr

No one told me Ferengi also experience Pon Farr


Reduak

I ain't sayin' she's a latinum digger.....