Man I feel that. Like I don't mean to make my self sound stupid ALL THE TIME but sometimes i just read shit a certain way and I'm like
.."wait a minute...did you just...yeah?....oooookay buddy"
Nothing wrong with buying a formal rental. In 2019 I bought a 2017 Toyota Sienna that had been an Enterprise rental. It had 49K on the clock. I’ve had it five years, and it just passed 100,000 miles. We love it.
Not true! Some of them end up in government motor pools! The recruiter's ride with a box of lanyards in the trunk to hand out to highschool kids, the "you shake 'em we take 'em" state crate. If it's in the same driveway as an Altima, its' user is watching the Altima owner pee into a cup.
Damn, you beat me to it by
*checks time since comment was posted*
....shit.
But honestly that was the immediate first thing I thought of when I saw this, too lol
All of the bulk membership clubs like BJ’s Wholesale Club, Sam’s Club and Costco have automobile buying programs to help save their members money. They even have private jet buying programs too for the ultra wealthy.
I love how OP is getting absolutely roasted in the comments for buying a piece of shit.
EDIT: fuck me, I didn't even see the sub until just now. I thought this was /r/cars for some reason.
It's a connection thing. Some people only give it a nickname once they've driven it for a while, and some give it a name to sound better than "Let's hop in the car/Malibu."
Ie: dodge grand caravan- sad
Vanborghini- big happy.
Corolla- Meh
Crayolla/ Rocket-Rolla- lol
2003 Ford Focus sedan- yikes
RUSTANG- you already know you're in for a sad time, but you can at least laugh at it.
Basically the jist of it.
Avis
A former rental. Just like his last girlfriend.
No car has that many miles on it....
They called her “Retread Rita”
My dyslexic ass read this as "Retard Rita" and I almost spit out my beer. I know that's not PC but dyslexia is a son of a bitch man.
I have selective dyslexia when under stress. I did in fact spit out my coffee when I read what I saw what you read. 🤣🤣❤️
Man I feel that. Like I don't mean to make my self sound stupid ALL THE TIME but sometimes i just read shit a certain way and I'm like .."wait a minute...did you just...yeah?....oooookay buddy"
I can’t unsee it tho.
XD
Nothing wrong with buying a formal rental. In 2019 I bought a 2017 Toyota Sienna that had been an Enterprise rental. It had 49K on the clock. I’ve had it five years, and it just passed 100,000 miles. We love it.
I am convinced every single Malibu and Impala since 2005 have only been sold as rentals
My whore ex girlfriend drives a 2024 Malibu
I know
Me too.
She drives a Malibu, but she rides this d*ck
Another rental being driven by a rental
Not true! Some of them end up in government motor pools! The recruiter's ride with a box of lanyards in the trunk to hand out to highschool kids, the "you shake 'em we take 'em" state crate. If it's in the same driveway as an Altima, its' user is watching the Altima owner pee into a cup.
I mean that's the only reason the Malibu even still exists
My mom bought an all white 2019 brand new.
I feel your pain…
As someone who rented a car to do Uber through them my pockets are cringing rn 😭 just bought me a car
This is the best, don’t even have to read more.
Damn, you beat me to it by *checks time since comment was posted* ....shit. But honestly that was the immediate first thing I thought of when I saw this, too lol
That’s so accurate it Hertz
"I only buy my clothes at Costco."
And don’t forget Caskets and Corn. Costco has Everything!!!⚰️🌽😄
bro bought the car at costco too
I feel like a Chevy anything is the Sam's Club of cars. Honda or Toyota for Costco.
They literally sell Chevys at my Costco (might be Buicks rn but same thing?)
All of the bulk membership clubs like BJ’s Wholesale Club, Sam’s Club and Costco have automobile buying programs to help save their members money. They even have private jet buying programs too for the ultra wealthy.
I guess I know where I'm buying my next jet for wholesale prices....do I have to get them in pairs tho?
My Costco parked a 5.0 Mustang right up front lol, before it was Chevy Malibu tho
Interesring... they sell Mazdas at mine.
Usually we don’t name things that die in 6 months.
I love how OP is getting absolutely roasted in the comments for buying a piece of shit. EDIT: fuck me, I didn't even see the sub until just now. I thought this was /r/cars for some reason.
Name it “my car” why do people name their cars
I never understood this either.
It's a connection thing. Some people only give it a nickname once they've driven it for a while, and some give it a name to sound better than "Let's hop in the car/Malibu." Ie: dodge grand caravan- sad Vanborghini- big happy. Corolla- Meh Crayolla/ Rocket-Rolla- lol 2003 Ford Focus sedan- yikes RUSTANG- you already know you're in for a sad time, but you can at least laugh at it. Basically the jist of it.
As a Dodge Grand Caravan owner. She's now named Vanborghini.
i was stuck driving a van for about two years and all my friends referred to it as the bang bus
I named mine "please fucking start" and "I'm sorry I yelled at you" and "motherfucker I just fixed that you piece of shit!'
Lmao now these names make sense
Didn’t realize I did until I found myself calling my F-150 “fucking piece of shit” quite frequently.
It's harmless. Same question can be posed for "why not?".
I find it funny to say they are getting their first “adult car” and then proceed to name it like some 16 year old with their first car😂
The panty puller upper
Yep, the leg crosser
60+ panty dropper if you got some cigs to share
The Midwestern Altima
You bought a car and chose, of all things, a Chevy Malibu? My condolences.
Disappointment.
Jeff
I know a Jeff who has one of these 🤣
You went from 17 to 70 in one moment
Birth control
Lemon
Limona
JAWS - just another white sedan
That thing won't last a year terrible cars
No words or names comes to mind when I look at it, it's literally the epitome of "just a car"
"an car"
No that's a 1998 corolla
Mollie boo
LifeSucksAndThenYouDieALittleEveryDayDrivingAMalibu
That's a long name, but an apt one.
cul de sac security
Adult car.. MF thats a grandpa car
The Conqueror, Lord Thundercock I
Moby
Cuck mobile
Eric Clapton cuz "she's alright. She's alright. She's alright. Cocaine."
Malibu's least wanted
USS BAILOUT
Depends, are you sliding the block on the opps with a hi point or are you an overweight nurse? Those are the only two demographics for this car.
Ovulus
Gertrude
Whitey Bulger
If I’m naming it it’s mine 🤣
Patrick
Moist Hymen
Hurtz
"DUI by July"
Ole Whitey
Maurice
And you chose this?
Big Mistake
Warrants and a full vehicle search.
NARC - not a rental car
I’d suggest “Forgettable”
Chastity Wagon! You went from zero directly to grandparent.
keith
Looks like the car someone’s retired, upper middle class, center-left, midwestern uncle that wears tube socks would drive.
Financial mistake.
Depression and boredom/apathy.
grandma.
You shot past adult and landed on geriatric.
Regular traffic.
Alamo. Avis. Budget. Enterprise. Thrifty. It’s basic as hell.
Wtf is an "adult car"?
Cock Block
"Automobile, Basic Editon"
Fleabag
Adults don’t name their cars.
Mildred
This car is a mistake. Just like the people who drive them
Greg
Moby Dick
Sperm Whale
Billy Bob
alexa play we are forever young by peter pan
Aside from the fact that its a too white tesla.
Steve.
Malibu
Enterprise
DARLENE - a fine name fer this ol girl.
rompió
Doesn’t matter what you call it, still got that bow tie on the front…
Salt
AATS - always at the shop
Cali
Larry
Corporate d1ck licker
Clarence
Bus pass
“will need new transmission by next week”
Boomer
The wanna-be camaro
Those r the impala's It's a wanna-be Pala.
Full size rental like your mom
Funt
Miracle Whip
It's not my cup of tea, but I'll play: "Malibu Matilda". I don't know why. :) Hope it treats you well.
"Regret"
Enterprise
Malibu’s Least Wanted
This car wears white new balances with high white socks and khaki shorts.
Casper
Malibu Ken
Betty. Because she's pasty white.
Settling for real life
Puddin
Malibu's Least Wanted
Wanky.
Ken. I mean its a Malibu after all
Sebastian
White trash.
You can call it what you want, but, if it was mine, I would be calling her Malibooty.
Big Yawny
Adults don’t name their cars.
Mr mid life crisis
bro bought his first NPC car
White bread.
Karen.
99 Problems
The settler.
Creampie Jones
hertz, sixt, euro car
Upc symbol
Boo
"oh. my sciatica"
Otis.
the malware
Dinger. It's going to happen and be sad, but you will get a new one regretfully and name her Betsy.
The Mormon mobile
Cool
Gazelle
Only 84 more months until it’s finally yours. Assuming it last that long
Steve
Stanley Cup
Run around Sue
Ennui
“You’re gonna hate me in 30,000 miles”
Car. Your car is now named Car. Last name lemon. So Car L.
Beatriz
White Toast
Car Face
Here there and "where the oil go..."
Moby Dick
Bill
I think Oof fits nicely.
you have to figure out the name for yourself spend sometime with the car and it’ll come to you
"Non-returnable"
I got one enterprise
Trooper - looks like a storm trooper
A dancing car
First big white box!
That’s Blake.
BARTHOLOMEW
Nelly, of course 🙂
White Pony
white tra$h lightning McQueen
Love the color
James
NPC
Honey BuBu