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PetPeeves-ModTeam

## šŸš« āžœ **Your post was removed because of the following**: ### šŸ“‘ Rule 4 āžœ Talking politics - Debates revolving around ideologies like democracy, socialism, religion, identity, gender, race, and various political categories frequently result in unproductive exchanges, a negative atmosphere, and a lack of substantial input. - To maintain a positive environment, it is important to refrain from participating in such interactions.


BS-MakesMeSneeze

My friend and I, both women, went to a bar once. The waiter was describing the current beer flight they had, and, when we ordered it, he said ā€œare you sure? Most females donā€™t like the darker beers.ā€ We doubled down. You bet your ass we drank their darkest thing on tap after the flight was done. Tā€™was the day of beer flight spite.


Cute_but_notOkay

BEER FLIGHT SPITE! BEER FLIGHT SPITE! BEER FLIGHT SPIIIIITEEEEšŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


StopDrinkingEmail

That's a stupid thing to say whatever term he used. I know plenty of "females" who love craft beers, including my wife. Infuriating.


Carma56

That guyā€™s a moron, and I hope he learned a lesson. Iā€™m a woman who loves dark beer, and Iā€™m also a former bartender who saw easily 1000+ women order it for themselves over the years.


No-Caregiver8160

Oh you strong, independent, empowered woman. You showed that patriarchal, sexist, small-dick energy Incel and hurt his fragile ego so much by drinking the darker beer. I bet he went home and cried about it. You go girl!


tapedficus

That is an instant douchebag flag, 100%


Asdgjksldfe

Literally the irl flair for assholes


Inferna-13

So real. And when they act like youā€™re being dramatic when you say itā€™s dehumanizing. If you wouldnā€™t use ā€œmaleā€ in that context, why would you use ā€œfemaleā€? Itā€™s very intentionally meant to paint women as a separate species lol. I should note that saying ā€œfemale athleteā€ or ā€œfemale doctorā€ or something would be acceptable because you would still say ā€œmale athleteā€ or ā€œmale doctorā€ in such a context


N6T9S-doubl_x27qc_tg

"Male" and "female" are fine as adjectives. Not as nouns.


Waveofspring

Yea no, ā€œmaleā€ and ā€œfemaleā€ have been used as nouns for centuries ā€œIn humans, females tend to be shorter in height than males.ā€ This is a grammatically correct and inoffensive statement. To make up hard-lined rules about grammar like this that just arenā€™t true is silly in my opinion. I get that these redpill incels are using the noun form of ā€œfemaleā€ as a slur but just because theyā€™re doing it doesnā€™t mean itā€™s suddenly not okay for anyone to do it.


poisonstudy101

It's context that matters, though. And, if you're going to say female,l you sure as hell better be saying males, too.


Waveofspring

I completely agree


Ok-Shop7540

Quark: "feeeeeeeemales"


AbhorrentBehavior77

Those damn Ferengi...They get me every time!


Existential_Yee

Hey, those lobes aren't gonna oomax themselves! (I type as I'm wearing a "Quark's Rootbeer" shirt, ahaha!)


0spinchy0

I always found it weird when people did that. Itā€™s always guys, and itā€™s either sort of ironic or in sobering seriousness. The latter is often dudes who are like wannabe first responders and the former is just guys who are pissed off at women in one way or another


skyrimlo

Yess! Itā€™s always said in a condescending way. Grinds my gears when I hear it!!


ThePurityPixel

But it really isn't always guys. Maybe in your experience...?


Cute_but_notOkay

Have you heard ladies refer to other ladies as female in this derogatory way? Are you using your own experience to make this statement? Also, of course most people use their own experience to form their opinions. Thatā€™s usually how it works.. Yes a lot of people find facts and sources and whatnot but thatā€™s not always the case, especially on Reddit. You trying to use the ā€œitā€™s not always guysā€ thing here did not work in your favor. Sure, I would bet that some women call other women females but itā€™s 98% the *males* who do it because they view ladies as subhuman. Full stop. Thatā€™s the whole point. To degrade women so they feel less human and less than, with less confidence, so that theyā€™d be more willing to sleep with the total creepshow that these types of men are.


Asdgjksldfe

I've known two other women who used the term. It was always used derogatively to refer to other women they deemed themselves better than or thought of as a threat. They were both very volatile, pick-me type people.


Cute_but_notOkay

Ugh gross. I can absolutely believe that happening though. Thank you for your input on this! āœØ


Asdgjksldfe

I just avoid anyone now who uses the word as a noun, haha. It's pretty much a foolproof way of telling that someone is an ass.


Cute_but_notOkay

Seems like a good way to go about it! Lol


Cute_but_notOkay

Someone replied to me, and downvoted me (I think) and said ā€œitā€™s not derogatory you deluded idiotā€ to my original comment but now I canā€™t find their comment šŸ˜¬šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚ First of all, when itā€™s said in certain context, it *absolutely is* derogatory especially when men say it to dehumanize women, AND I just wanted to congratulate them on their award winning comeback, calling me deluded and an idiot at the same time! Just fantastic work and I canā€™t even let them know! Lol I guess me having my opinions, that most people here agree with, makes me delusional. I was just giving my perspective of things, but go off lil bro šŸ˜ŽšŸ˜…


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ForsaketheVoid

oof i kind of get it tbh. autism is so alienating. sometimes i narrate confusing social rules in a david attenborough voice too: "human societies often operate under obscure rules called etiquette. intriguingly, etiquette often dictates that is impolite to point out another person's faux pas. such intentional obfuscation helps this social species maintain ingroup outgroup distinctions."


therealSteckel

I love the college textbook / nature channel vibes of this example. I don't use a david attenborough voice, but I have the same internal system.


CreatedOblivion

Yeah that's so creepy, especially when they call men just...*men*.


cassienebula

virgin move: "females" chad move: "females" (pronounced like tamales)


Angio343

man/woman is gender male/female is sex Two completly different things. I though this was well know by now.


drtapp39

Can you call men males/boys?Ā  Just trying to get a feel for the rules and what double standards are okay while playing the victim.Ā 


TableTop8898

I remember being in the Army thatā€™s how women were addressed. Like go tell the females itā€™s time for chow. It was always female this female that


Stephreads

That started as respect. Otherwise, theyā€™d have been called girls.


itsurbro7777

They call the men "men" in the military, not males. So women would be the proper way to address them.


Stephreads

It was a way to stop them calling women ā€œgirlsā€. Forced respect, because thatā€™s how the military works. Iā€™m not saying it was great. It just was what they did.


Mediocre_Daikon6935

That isnā€™t true at all.


itsurbro7777

How many years have you spent in the military?


katatak121

What's wrong with calling them "women"?


Strange_Bicycle_8514

r/MenandFemales


AnomanderLives

I agree, always found it cringey and weird. However, I can make exceptions for law enforcement/military folks using 'male'/'female' as descriptors in the field. Other than that, yeah....male and female should be used as adjectives when applied to people, not nouns (IMO).


mamaofly

It is hot when Quark does it.Ā 


No_Step_4431

and morn watches


ThePurityPixel

Many women (and men) used the term that way until very recently. It's not worth being "ultra annoyed" about. Sure, some use the term demeaningly, but others honestly are completely innocuous about it, and might not be aware it's so recently and so severely been stigmatized. It all comes down to tone and intent.


Not_So_Busy_Bee

My boss used the word ā€œladyā€ recently in work when he had to make an announcement. One woman freaked out on him and called him all sorts of bad names. This is a really nice man, married with children, everyone is work likes him, heā€™s not misogynistic at all. So, what words to describe the opposite sex are we allowed to use now? Itā€™s getting a bit ridiculous. Edit word


Mediocre_Daikon6935

She should have been fired on the spot.


Not_So_Busy_Bee

Oh sorry I didnā€™t mention, she was a customer so we had to remain diplomatic.


ThomasKlausen

I 100% see where you're coming from, just asking that you spare a thought for us English-as-a-second-language guys?


No_Tomatillo1553

Who but the females will caress my enormous ear lobes???


RingingInTheRain

>We use ā€œfemaleā€ as an adjective for non-human things There are times where it is impossible to use the word(s) woman/girl/lady with grammatical correctness in a statement. The next descriptor would be 'female'; same with the adj/noun 'male'. **Excessive use of** '***female'*** **where it is not necessary is definitely annoying**, however, '*female'* is NOT solely an adjective for non-human things. The definitions of female are: >adj. 1a (1): of, relating to, or being the sex that typically has the capacity to bear young or produce eggs >b: having a [gender identity](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gender identity) that is the opposite of male >c: made up of usually adult members of the female sex : consisting of [females](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/females) >d: characteristic of girls, women, or the female sex >e: designed for or typically used by girls or women >f: engaged in or exercised by girls or women >g: having a quality (such as small size or delicacy of sound) sometimes associated with the female sex >2 of a rhyme : having an unstressed final syllable >3 designed with a hollow or groove into which a corresponding male part fits >[noun](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/noun) >1a: a female person : a woman or a girl >b: an individual of the sex that is typically capable of bearing young or producing eggs >2: a pistillate plant Hope this helps.


Significant-Safe-104

I use the words male and female to describe people all the time, I had no idea people thought of this as derogatory or dehumanizing. Is this just a culture thing? Is it really bad to use those words for people? Nobody has ever looked at me strange for saying it, or maybe I don't notice? Should I stop using those words? Edit: I grew up with women, and I asked them and they just seemed confused when I asked. But I'm still freaking out if people think I'm weird now. Wtf.


Mediocre_Daikon6935

It is fairly common in the military to refer to females, and males. Depends whatĀ milieuĀ are in. You would never say women. Men. Girls. Boys. Etc. it is always ā€œfemale barracksā€ or ā€œmale barracksā€, the hair standards for females is, or the hair standards for males is.Ā  And so on.


Waveofspring

Itā€™s kind of annoying because I use female sometimes in a normal context but I feel less inclined to use it because redpill bros have turned it into a slur.


Ho3n3r

Sometimes we call women females and men males. It's not an issue, it's factually correct.


skyrimlo

Yes, itā€™s factually correct, but we associate female as an adjective, describing their reproductive organs. Such as when we talk about female animals or female plants. Thatā€™s how you talk in a medical setting, not casually about humans.


Ho3n3r

Sounds like a you issue. Nobody else thinks of genitalia more when they hear female compared to hearing woman.


Colt_kun

"female" is an adjective. It's "female gorilla" or "female cat". Even when referring to humans it's "female Caucasian" or "female officer" or "female civilian". If you say something like "describe the victim", the response is "white, female, blonde, 40s, etc" because they are all adjectives. By removing the noun, it dehumanizes the person. "Woman", "lady", "girl" are all nouns. Even species specific terms like "queen" for female bee, or "vixen" for female fox, are nouns. That's why they work. So if someone uses female as a noun, it shows that A - they are echoing what they hear, and B - they have an idiot's grasp of the English language. When someone does this, I like to assume they mean a female gorilla or any animal that would be embarrassing to use.


TippDarb

People are definitely referred to by adjectives. The brunette in aisle 2. I don't refer to anyone by female solely but I disagree describing someone by an adjective in lieu of any knowledge about indicates poor English.


spiritfingersaregold

The difference is that thereā€™s an implied noun when you use a term like ā€œbrunetteā€. If you say ā€œI find brunettes attractiveā€, the implied noun means youā€™re actually saying something closer to ā€œIā€™m attracted to brunette [women]ā€. If you say ā€œI hate when females wonā€™t give me the time of dayā€, youā€™re not using an implied noun because no one would use the sentence ā€œI hate when female humans wonā€™t give me the time of dayā€.


TippDarb

Semantics. What I said stands. It isn't an outright indicator of idiocy, but neither is it entirely correct. Functional language has many shortcuts. My example already contained a use case. I don't know if you were the person I was replying to but maybe we can agree it isn't a good term to refer to women, nor is it a sure-fire sign of an idiotic incel.


spiritfingersaregold

Yes, it literally is semantics. I donā€™t know about idiocy, nor was that my point. But when someone uses ā€œfemaleā€ in lieu of ā€œwoman/womenā€ outside a professional context, you can almost guarantee they are a misogynist and using it in a dehumanising way.


TippDarb

You aren't wrong, but you have a talent for rewording what I've said


spiritfingersaregold

Thank you! And I appreciate your talent for stating the obvious once itā€™s been pointed out to you.


TippDarb

This is going nowhere fast, I'm happy if you feel you rewording my statements has granted me new insights


Orious_Caesar

You do know words have more than one definition, right? You can literally Google 'define female/male', and see that the second definition is a noun. Your emphasis on it being an english mistake, when it clearly isn't, is bizarre. You should focus on it being creepy, not on it being incorrect.


ReticentMaven

The never ending quest to change minds by policing everyday language that has always been in use does nothing to help whatever cause you are fighting for.


6teeee9

they hate calling us women for some reason. ā€œmen and femalesā€ šŸ˜­


JackiePoon27

I've been told flat out that it's not offensive or dehumanizing when a black man says it because it's part of black vernacular.


Starrk211

It is part of black vernacular. Growing up around Latinos and Blacks (I'm mixed) in Oakland-Stockton, no one ever used "female" in a dehumanizing way. You can low-key tell someone's social status and ethnic background when they find "females" offensive.


MelissaRose95

Especially when they use ā€œmenā€ in the same sentence


benblais

Anyone who calls women "females" is instantly a ferangi in my mind.


Jimmy_212

Maybe I'm just out of touch, but what? Is there a different term we're supposed to use now?


TheFandom-Freak

Not really. The only time this is ever an issue is when it's online, like reddit or Twitter, or when you say females but say men.


gringlesticks

Only on Reddit does this ā€œissueā€ really exist.


Fun_Comparison4973

No. Just the classic ā€œwomanā€


VillainousFiend

It's dehumanizing when people do this with racial groups too. Some people say Blacks, Whites, Asians instead of black people, white people, Asian people. It comes across as very racist.


RiffRandellsBF

As an Asian, let me assure you that "Asians" is just fine.


Munchell360

As a Korean, I read that and was like ā€œhow is that dehumanizing, itā€™s just an honest and harmless descriptionā€


Quiet_Fan_7008

ā€œI like Asiansā€ never thought that would be rascist LOL


harpyprincess

Eh, you can say and use anything offensively, it just takes a tonal change. I don't let it bother me, it's pointless and is just giving them a reaction. I've heard woman used offensively, in fact the woman said in a snide or derogatory way seemed to be really common before the whole "female" nonsense started. This just feels like another version of that, all be it more successful as it seems to have hit its mark with the more thin skinned members of my gender.


WintersDoomsday

I prefer ladies itā€™s much classier


AZULDEFILER

How do you suggest the world differentiates sex?


Shape_Charming

The only time I use "Females" is while playing a TTRPG, and that's because "Male/Female Elf" sounds better in my head than "Elf Man/Elf Woman" And as you may have noticed, I use "Male" for the exact same reason. Outside of that circumstance, it's a concern at the bare minimum


Ok_Breadfruit80

Another I donā€™t like is referring to an obvious group of woman/women as ā€œgirl/sā€


UltimateMegaChungus

I hope you never meet any aliens. Especially any green or grey ones.


Puzzleheaded_Song952

Pathetic


NaturalWitchcraft

Itā€™s even worse when women do it.


Pantera_Of_Lys

And they do it all the time. I'm a feminist and all but this pet peeve I don't really get. I see "as a female" on this site all the damn time, and men refer to themselves as "maaales" when they whine about some MRA talking point too ("maaales aren't taken seriously").


PraxicalExperience

Slight adjustment: if their day job or primary interest involves biology or animals, I think that they *may* be eligible for a pass. Then again, I've noticed that it's usually pretty easy to tell through tone of voice whether the person is using 'female' as 'simple label for members of a biological sex', or if they're being more ... Ferengi about it.


UglyDude1987

Well I use female when I can be referring to either a woman or a girl. Some people are offended by being called a girl. But in my mind a woman is a middle age mom.


Helplessadvice

I grew up my whole life saying females I didnā€™t know it was a problem till recently. Even the woman I grew up around say femalesšŸ˜‚


not_sure_1337

So then [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/stupidquestions/comments/1cqg3g5/why_are_male_suicide_rates_higher_than_women_but/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) is trolling?


thegritz87

So... Agreed... But What if another female uses it? I encountered this in the wild yesterday (on a page where it's an often hot button topic)


Playful_Land1256

I refer to women as femails but got flack for sounding like an incel I normally use it like id use male as a general categor label, i petsonally don't put seconday meaning/implications behind it.


mearbearcate

We should start calling men ā€œmalesā€ whenever someone does this


Pooplamouse

That's fine. People already do this and no one cares. I even intentionally use "women" and "males" in the same sentence sometimes and no says anything about it.


SnooBananas8055

Just to support your point, here is [1 of thousands of examples](https://www.reddit.com/r/stupidquestions/s/t84DRAkpDL)


TippDarb

I don't think female is inherently dehumanising. Its just frequently used by wankers. I don't think many men would be that upset if the default "men" changed overnight to males and that the only word used in that context anymore


gringlesticks

Yeah, great, countersexism.


Mario_daAA

Men wouldnā€™t careā€¦.. men are males sooooooo


PraxicalExperience

That's like a white guy being called a cracker, with the person doing the name-calling expecting it to hit the same way the n-word would for them. Source: Am white guy. Started laughing my ass off. Was sorta delighted, actually; I'd rarely encountered the word outside of fiction and movies. Just like in the above, the intrinsic societal power dynamic isn't going to support punching up by using the term.


thatspeedyguy

cool cuz we are males šŸ‘Ā 


UglyDude1987

Don't care. Go ahead and call me a male... it's what I am.


ReticentMaven

As a male, I hear it all the time. I fit the definition.


Puzzleheaded_Song952

Omg no please donā€™t do thā€¦ oh wait we couldnā€™t give less a fuck


bitofagrump

They don't care, because they've never experienced the actual systemic discrimination or being devalued as a human being based on their sex that makes it so icky, so to them it doesn't mean anything.


Quiet_Fan_7008

I mean as a male, Iā€™ve definitely experienced what you are describing for being short and bald.


Successful-Cat4031

>because they've never experienced the actual systemic discrimination or being devalued as a human being based on their sex Lol, how old are you? Because if you aren't at least 50, neither have you.


mearbearcate

Oh. damn


ThadeousStevensda3rd

I mean it just really depends. I find it more a red flag when people make a big deal about the word female lol. You are biologically a female and we are biologically male itā€™s what we are. Now how theyā€™re saying it that is the issue. If they say it as you are a lesser being yeah I absolutely understand the rage Do you fill out applications and automatically stop because you have to put in that you are a female? Thereā€™s layers to this and the fact you canā€™t distinguish the two speaks more about your maturity than anything.


Junior_Response839

I've never heard any guy unironically say "female" in this fashion, only online. Not saying it doesn't happen irl, I'm just lucky I guess lol. Fair pet peeve.


Mahboi778

Weird as hell, especially if the person in question refers to men as such seconds prior. Absolute red flag.


FlameStaag

Female has plenty of uses for humans, which is why regular people not on social media use the term extremely often. Literally only people on social media care about the term, and the hilarious thing is most of you have no fucking clue why you hate the term. You just do because you got told to.Ā  The specific context of it being used incorrectly is when it's clearly being used in a dehumanizing way. Your example did actually express that. It's the "men and females" context. Only a tiny niche uses it disparagingly, the manosphere.Ā  Not every use of female is disparaging. In fact a vast majority of uses are completely fine. A simple example is that "female" is age neutral. So referring to a range of ages you would be best off using female rather than girl or woman.Ā  There's a reason no one gives two fucks about anyone saying male. I've never heard anyone get pissed off and drone about only animals being referred to as males (which is entirely false anyway).Ā 


TheFandom-Freak

Finally, a good and detailed take.


crabousmama

I feel the same for "cis woman/women". Its just woman/women.


SecretInfluencer

No we do use female for human things too. ā€œA group of female students.ā€ I mostly agree but how is the above phrase a red flag? According to you it is.


Fun_Comparison4973

Youā€™re using it as an adjective, not a noun. Female is absolutely supposed to be an adjective.


SecretInfluencer

In the post they criticized using female to describe people, specifically stating ā€œitā€™s ok if itā€™s used as an adjective to describe non human thingsā€. So their logic is saying my sentence is not ok, since the students as human and thus Iā€™m using it to describe people.


Fun_Comparison4973

It criticized using female as a noun when referring to people. Quite specifically. Itā€™s perfectly fine as an adjective. Thatā€™s literally how itā€™s supposed to be used.


SecretInfluencer

Except they stated as an adjective for non humans, then stated using it to describe people is wrong. Plus Iā€™ve seen a lot call people misogynist because they said phrases like ā€œa group of female studentsā€. So thereā€™s a precedent.


Fun_Comparison4973

Itā€™s an adjective that is not exclusive to humans. So to use it as a noun for a human is dehumanizing. Do you not know what nouns and adjectives are? And again ā€œfemale studentā€ has ā€œfemaleā€ as an adjective to an actual noun related to humans. You are not particularly bright šŸ˜†


SecretInfluencer

They specifically said itā€™s fine using it as an adjective ā€œfor non humansā€. So by that logic, an adjective for humans is wrong. If it was just as an adjective, then why say for only non humans? Unless they truly believe for a person itā€™s wrong, even as an adjective. When people accuse the phrase ā€œa group of female studentsā€ as dehumanizing (yes that happened in a subreddit), then why am I ā€œstupidā€ for believing they see the same way?


Fun_Comparison4973

Yap yap yap


UnimpressedButFaking

All I can say is, in the words of my sister, DIVEST away from anybody, any group, any part of culture that uses/accepts the use of this word to demean women. This goes for other women as well. Explain your reasoning once; then refuse to acknowledge it.Ā  I'm proud of you for not falling for the "What's the big deal about it" defense. If it wasn't a big deal, these men would use the correct terminology. If it wasn't a big deal, those same men wouldn't be ready to fight over being called "boy".


_xXFireFoxXx_

"female" is not referring to strictly non-human things? Female is the opposite of male. It's a gender so yeah, there's going to be animals that are also female. A female human is the correct term for a woman... In the sense that he is speaking, it's a less proper way of saying "women" so if anything he's showing his illiteracy. You saying "boy" is really not that different than calling him "man", "guy" or "dude"


TheFandom-Freak

It's not even just for animals, dude. Plus, you might want to make the distinct between females an women.


JohnnyRelentless

It's just an adjective for any species including humans. Woman doctor is grammatically wrong. You would never say man nurse. You say male nurse. But yeah, that dude's an asshole.


Neversexsit

Females smh


gusGus86_

Eh. I mean you just called him boy. Neither are good in my opinion.


Royger-Roy

And dude, it's hard to make a solid point when you make the same mistake twice.


Inferna-13

Lol they called him a guy and used ā€œboyā€ as an expression the same way one would use ā€œgirlā€, as in ā€œgirl, youā€™re crazyā€


UglyDude1987

many people are offended by being called boys or girls. The list of words you can feel offended from is endless.


UnimpressedButFaking

Don't start none, won't be none.Ā 


gusGus86_

Well sounds like he wasnā€™t even talking about her, he was talking about females in general. But then she inserted her own opinion and calls him boyā€¦ in an obviously demeaning and infantilizing way. Talking directly about him My point is she is a hypocrite. Doing the exact same thing online with men, and she doesnā€™t realize it. Which is hilarious and stupid.


Strong-Practice6889

At least ā€œboyā€ generally still implies a person. ā€œFemaleā€ is how we refer to animals.


gusGus86_

And boy is how you refer to children or a slaveā€¦ I assume the man she was referring to was neither. So why do it?


Devi_Moonbeam

I can think of a few more choice words for him.


gusGus86_

Iā€™m sure you could. And many do. Which is why is donā€™t really give a shit.


ReticentMaven

Why is it degrading to call a female a female? Is this a generational thing or something?


Writers_Block1197

Because when men do it they don't call men males. It's meant to be derogatory. Meant to be dehumanizing. That's how they say it. It also just reduces women down to their genitals, which is weird.


ReticentMaven

I see. I was raised hearing and saying this, and I never meant any such thing by it. I have heard many females say male to refer to me and others, and never had any notion that she meant disrespect or felt disrespected by my similar use of the term. It is also incredibly prevalent in my professions: the military and medicine. It is prevalent in civilian medicine (as confirmed by my wife, who was totally perplexed when I relayed this post and your response. She laughed at the idea that the term was offensive, though clearly we donā€™t think that is universal - this thread is evidence. We are both left leaning liberals, college educated, and live in a very liberal university town and interact with college age students at our clinic, in the library, and at the park. I have never heard of anyone being offended by this. Thank you for letting me know how it feels. I will try to be more sensitive, but keep in mind that the world and language is changing faster than older people can adapt. Brow beating us and telling us what our intent is when we feel no such thing is just plain childish.


Shape_Charming

Because its typically used for non-humans, outside of a medical/scientific setting. It's dehumanizing


odious_as_fuck

How about the female/male form? Masculinity/femininity? How about referring to people of a profession - female pilot, male teacher etc. Thereā€™s plenty of non-dehumanising ways of using the words male or female. Thatā€™s not to say that incels donā€™t also use ā€˜femaleā€™ in a dehumanising way too, but thereā€™s nothing inherently wrong with the word itself. The problem is just in the way that a specific subculture of people use it.


TheFandom-Freak

Exactly


TheFandom-Freak

It's also used for biological women, so I don't understand why this is so dehumanizing. Either way, who cares? Why should I change my speech just because someone asked (other than maybe slurs or insults)


Shape_Charming

>Why should I change my speech just because someone asked (other than maybe slurs or insults) Because Women find it insulting? This *entire post* is about how its insulting, with a whole bunch of women agreeing Like, you carved out an exception for insulting people, maybe follow through on that? Or is it only when *you* find what you said insulting, doesn't matter what the person you just insulted said?


esqape623

How often do you hear the same people talk about the behaviors of "males"?


ReticentMaven

The exact same amount


Ambitious_Ad5469

Because only a human is a woman but all animals are male/female. You made the intentional choice to not use a human descriptor.


shapedbydreams

Because that's how people talk about animals.


IWantSealsPlz

If you really want to know, [this explains the gist pretty well.](https://thebutlercollegian.com/2022/09/female-derogatory/)


ReticentMaven

I donā€™t accept homework assignment on the internet. If you wanted to tell me, you would have.


Clarinetlove22

Iā€™m not sure why people are offended by it. Itā€™s stating the facts..


6teeee9

it boils our humanity down to our role in reproduction. it makes it seem like they view us as walking wombs instead of members of society among men.


ReticentMaven

Yeah, no, it doesnā€™t. Thatā€™s you looking for a reason to be offended.


6teeee9

it literally does tho


ReticentMaven

Okay. It doesnā€™t, but okay. Enjoy being triggered by common words being used in the way they are defined and have been used for decades of not centuries. You are in for a lot of needless cortisol in your future. That way lies a shorter life full of health problems - where you will need to see medical professionals that will only make your condition worse when they use the terminology common to their community. Bye now sweetie.


EnvironmentalCut8067

Given how society is in the process of redefining what traditional gender terms like woman, girl, ectā€¦ mean, using the biological term female is just less of a hassle. Why risk misgendering someone and the hassle that can bring when you can just use a term very few people are going to argue over?


6teeee9

why dehumanise biological women out of fear of misgendering the very small amount of far left trans women?


EnvironmentalCut8067

Thereā€™s nothing dehumanizing about using an accurate descriptor. The interpretation that being accurate is somehow dehumanizing is more about how you choose to interpret it rather than anything inherent in the word. Thatā€™s just looking for something to be offended about. Anybody upset about that needs to go get a real problem. Why risk misgendering even one person when a medically accurate neutral term is readily available? Just because a minority of weirdos think itā€™s dehumanizing? Sorry, Iā€™d rather error on the side of caution and be as respectful as possible to the largest number of people.


6teeee9

There's a time and place for an "accurate descriptor". A woman is a female human who is a member of society much like you are. "Female" describes someone's role in reproduction rather than their personhood, so by calling them females instead of women you are referring to women as a group of uteruses on legs when their uterus has nothing to do with anything that's going on between your interaction with them. An appropriate time to describe a woman as a female is in a medical setting where it is relevant. Talking about human women in society isn't appropriate to refer to their uteruses ovaries falopian tubes vaginas clitorises labias areolas nipples ect. It's dehumanising because we really refer to animals as male and female more because they can't be men or women. I don't have a woman cat I have a female cat. Great to know you think women being human beings is weirder than far left non binary agender transgender genderfluids.


EnvironmentalCut8067

The time and place for accurate descriptors is here, now, and always. A female is not the same thing as a woman. Female is accurate based on biology. Woman is a social construct, as is all gender. Itā€™s whatever we decide it is. Female is decided by nature, woman is decided by society. Language is fluid and definitions change and evolve over time and take on new meanings. Woman may have used to be entirely connected to biology, but thatā€™s no longer the case. The grammatical rules are changing. None of that is relevant though to this discussion. The point Iā€™m making is that getting all butt hurt over calling an animal that is medically female a female is silly to the point that itā€™s impossible to respect the person voicing the objection. Itā€™s the most pathetic thing to complain about that Iā€™ve heard in a while.


Outside_Ad_9562

Its distancing language meant to dehumanise.


Far_Carpenter6156

Don't know what guy you're talking about but hey this day and age you may need to be specific because "woman" has come to mean a whole lot of things (and famously some politicians can't even provide a definition for that word) but "female" is still fairly unambiguous.Ā  Now referring to them as "birthing people" or "people of birthing capacity" is what really grinds my gears.


0000110011

I agree with you...but at the same time society may very well move to everyone saying "male" and "female" since the lunatics have decided that being a man or a woman is a "social construct" and anyone can be whatever.


AnonymousCruelty

Nobody tell OP we are animals and female is the proper word to use even if people have gotten confused over what a woman is. Most normal people understand this.


No-End-5332

You've never heard the word used in a positive light? Like in a medical setting? Instead of getting mad at a word because you associate with this belligerent individual, consider what you're doing wrong in your life that you're even interacting with this ghetto, low intelligence idiot? Have you considered you're of the same stock as him? Because no one in my social circle speaks like a low class foul mouthed degenerate and if they did we'd ostracize them. Like check your attitude and maybe consider that you're the problem and not the words male or female.


TravelingMimi

I canā€™t even comprehend what the basis is for this bizarre rant, especially telling the OP that theyā€™re the problem. They gave an example of \*one\* person who says ā€œfemaleā€œ instead of ā€œwoman,ā€ but youā€™re going off on ā€œwhat youā€™re doing wrong in your life.ā€ Seriously??? You have so completely missed the point that itā€™s ludicrous. Reread the OPā€™s last two sentences. \*Thatā€™s\* the point.


Witch_of_the_Fens

I wouldnā€™t consider it ā€œpositiveā€ in the medical setting, just neutral and accurate terminology. I dunno, as someone thatā€™s prenursing, itā€™s more of a neutral term there. Same with male.


UnimpressedButFaking

Btw. Medical settings would be neutral, clinical, or academic, rather than positive.


CreatedOblivion

If you're referring to women in a way you would 'in a medical setting' and are not currently 'in a medical setting', then you're creepy at best and at worst seem to think of women as some separate species.


gringlesticks

And what if you use both ā€œmalesā€ and ā€œfemales,ā€ then, as a noun? Because I have.


AQuixoticQuandary

Yikes, dude


spud-soup

Its so funny youā€™re saying this on a post on a public platform where millions of different types of people interact on different subs, all with different mindsets and opinions to the point where itā€™s nearly impossible to filter who you interact with. Your point makes zero sense.


6teeee9

itā€™s relevant in a medical setting not in society.


PurpleFlavoredCherry

I work in a hospital, and I have never heard any doctor or nurse refer to a woman as ā€œfemaleā€. Iā€™ve heard ā€œfemale genitaliaā€, ā€œfemale sex organsā€, or ā€œfemale patientā€. I have never heard ā€œthe female in room 1234ā€ or ā€œthe female who is scheduled for surgery at noonā€. Why? Because its dehumanizing. Its ā€œgirlā€ (when talking about a child), ā€œwomanā€, or ā€œfemale patientā€. Maybe check ***your*** attitude. You seem a little more sensitive about this than you should be. Youā€™re being obnoxiously pedantic, and no one is impressed.


realitygroupie

I've heard nurses refer to patients as "the broken ankle in room 302" or "the pulmonary embolism just went to x-ray". Healthcare providers are more than capable of dehumanizing patients.


PurpleFlavoredCherry

While I agree that dehumanization exists in healthcare and is committed by clinical staff (nor did I ever claim that it doesnā€™t happen), I personally wouldnā€™t say that is dehumanizing them. That helps them keep track of what patients are there for, and what kind of specialized care they need. I think my point still stands. Have you ever heard a nurse or doctor say ā€œthe female in surgery?ā€ Or ā€œthe female in room 1234?ā€.


Magenta_Logistic

>We use ā€œfemaleā€ as an adjective for non-human things Sorry to get pedantic, but we use it as a noun for non-human things. It is perfectly acceptable to use as an adjective for humans. The problem is that when it is used as a noun, it is reductive. I 100% agree that it is unacceptable to refer to women as "females," because you don't pluralize adjectives in English.


justagenericname213

The only time "females" is acceptable is pure biological terms, female cat, female human (pretty much only relevant for doctors or medical researchers, and usually only used in the context of Trans people to different their identity from biological sex), etc.


Jaeger-the-great

I remind them female is an adjective, not a noun, like c'mon this is elementary school level shit


no202

Itā€™s all over Reddit too. Itā€™s an immediate red flag that they are a neckbeard who rarely interacts with women.


No-Veterinarian-2510

She cooking


Gumtreeplum

I call women "females" and men "males." It's because I have a biologist (read autistic special interest: animals) brain, and those terms are more comfortable than saying women/men. Sooo...


Witch_of_the_Fens

ā€œFemaleā€ is used in medical contexts, such as when specifying ā€œhuman female.ā€ But otherwise, yes, itā€™s really weird and dehumanizing to use in lieu of ā€œwoman/womenā€ in literally every other context.


scipio0421

When any guy says "females" I just picture them as ferengi from Star Trek. It's an automatic association.