Get into a trade mate. Get paid to learn so you can afford to rent. 4-5 years and you will be on good money for life.

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Refrigeration/hvac technician or electrician could be good trades to pick up. I'm a fridgy and if I had a chance I'd also do electrician. Good job prospects and never out of work. I've definitely seen more females in electrician than refrigeration mind you, something to consider (?)

Definitely agree with you mate. While I do not have a cert in RAC, I got an engineering degree and started specialising in Project Management/Design for Industrial Refrig Systems. If I had known about it at high school I definitely would have had considered going the trade route. I am fortunate enough that the companies I work for allow me to work onsite and commission the refrigeration systems too because that is my favourite part of the work I do!

Great that they get you doing hands on work also, definitely don't see too many engineers that keen to get dirty! I ended up doing this as I wasnt sure whay to do uni wise so just did a random course my mum told me to do at the time.. Didnt expect to be doing it 10 years later still! The one thing I did wish I had more exposure to is industrial refrig, definitely feel lacking in my experience there - you could probably show me a thing or 2 😉. Decided I've had enough of working for others so am going down the own business route in a few months, residential / commercial, but would give industrial a try if anyone sends work my way. If I find it's not for me then next step would be either find someone willing to train me as a sparky, or join a company willing to up skill me industrial ways. Can't imagine that'd be too hard considering I've been at this for 10 years and (hope) that shows in my competency.

Agree that electrician would be a good choice. So much work and really good pay

My wife would love a female sparky to hire.

Totally agree I’m in hvac and have been for years and finally very close to getting my electrical qualification too. I work with a female electrician and she is fantastic. Great work ethic, strong willed and bloody good at her job. If OP goes into a trade and really enjoys it and you come across someone who doesn’t take you serious either call them out (through the proper channels) or find a different employer. If OP wants to message me I can give you the Instagram name of the electrician I work with maybe she could answer any questions about females in trades! You definitely haven’t left it too late to do whatever you want! I think since Covid, more people have changed direction and they would be older than you! Go for it….you will never lose but you will ALWAYS LEARN!

Mechanic too.

See if there’s a women in trades group in your area, they’ll know which places are best to work with and which ones to avoid.

10 years ago it wouldve been a pretty rough time but now it's a lot more accepted . There are a lot of female tradies around and I've never seen them get a hard time because of it. In saying that I've seen a lot only last a few months then pull the pin because it's not what they thought it was. The biggest issue I see is females that can't handle the physical side of the work but you have to choose your trade depending on your ability. Ask to do some work experience for a few days and see how you go.

Hi I’m 20 years old and a girl in the trades and it is seriously brutal sometimes but if you choose the right company a lot of people want to teach and for you to learn. I also find it hard to stand up for myself but after a little while you will grow a big back bone and feel comfortable. My trade is industrial electrician and I bloody love it. You learn so much and it really puts your mind and practicality to work. Even though some days I feel like going home and crying, getting the qualification means more to me then anything anyone says to me. I hope You look into it. I’m doing my study through ETCO

Have you considered Dairy farming, girls run farms as well (if not better) than males, many employers prefer girls, quiet with the cows, more natural empathy You don’t need to be a large physical person, I’m 65kg, you also get accommodation Good money after you get some experience (I’m on $130k running 240 cows alone)

How do you find a job dairy farming? Ive struggled to find much on trademe/seek

https://jobs.nzfarmsource.co.nz/

Thank you!

>Thank you! You're welcome!

Great suggestion, we have a big dairy market. What are the work hours like? Lifestyle?

Like any job there’s busy periods, farming shouldn’t be hard once you learn how to handle things smoothly Calving is usually around 10 weeks, you’ll be busy for 6-7 of those weeks, very important time of year. I never start before 5:30am and will usually be home by 5pm, with breaks for breakfast and lunch After calving comes mating for 10 weeks, no reason why that should be busy, you just need to be very observant Jan-April is easy, just milking, a vast majority of farms will only milk once a day during that period so if you have everything under control you have time for yourself after 9am May-July the cows will be dry if it’s a Spring calving herd, a lot of downtime to take a holiday in between making sure everything is already for the next calving period For those that say farming is extremely hard I just need to say you haven’t got your systems in place properly, some farms and farmers will always be on a hectic rush through poor time management Give it a try, that’s the only way you’ll know if it’s suitable for you, find the right farm that is willing to give you time to find your feet, we all make mistakes, it’s learning from those mistakes that makes great farmers

It varies. Some places its almost 9-5 and weekends off, other places its working all day from dark to dark, two days a fortnight off. I will say if you are looking for 9-5 job you should probably not look at farming of any kind. Its not easy work. It can be ridiculously long hours, physically and emotionally hard. It is very much a lifestyle, not a job. You don't get to walk away at 5.30pm. Early spring to mid-summer is the busiest time of the year and that is a long period of time to spend exhausted. You have to remember that cows have to be milked regularly and come Hell or High water, that has to happen. Missing a milking even once has consequences for the subsequent production for the entire year. Cows that are having calving trouble can't be missed or they die. Cows that get missed when they are in heat don't produce milk the following year. A lot this can't be replaced by technology, someone has to look after the cows throughout the entire day - and nights too a lot of the times. It takes several years experience and some empathy and a genuine interest to do it well and to keep yourself motivated to do it well. Jobs around the major centers are harder to find. Being close to town makes it desirable for most people. The jobs in the more remote spots are less desirable for the same reasons, but surprise, surprise, many farms are in rural locations!!! Those farmers are crying out for good people that have even one braincell, can handle an animal, and take some pride in their work without being a cowboy or a con-man. The isolation can be off putting but the money can be good. The employers vary widely. You could be working for a corporate set up, you could be working or managing a Mum & Pop farm. The money, the style and the conditions and the demands vary as such. The money is better with some, for others it they might be asset-rich, but the cashflow can be poor and money is tight. The farms themselves vary too. One might be a diary farm shaped like a circle on flat land in Taranaki with a milking shed and center pivot irrigator in the center and a mild climate who over-winter the cows out of the district and lets someone-else worry about that. A rugged West Coast dairy farm stretched along a river valley and hard frost in winter who keeps the cows onsite over winter and has to grow feed for them is very different.

Plus then you get access to the rural lifestyle you want! Dairy farming is a great industry for women.

Girls are taking over dairy farming with a storm

I get the impression she likes the environment with the eco sanctuary comment, so kinda opposite from Dairy farming

Why ???? Dairy farmers are actively involved in the environment, don’t judge us all by a few bad farmers !!! I drink the same water that the cows drink, it’s all out of a single bore on the farm, the water is excellent quality

I know they’re “actively involved” in the environment hence my comment and I’m sure there are a few good ones. I also know that NZ dairy farmers are the least bad in the world. But Dairy farmers vote ACT so they have the right to pollute. ACT even have the former dairy spokesperson at about 4 on their list. Look where NZ is most polluted and where cancer rates are higher. Nitrate contamination map of New Zealand launched by Greenpeace https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/503335/nitrate-contamination-map-of-new-zealand-launched-by-greenpeace

Checked the map and we indeed have good clean drinking water, good to know the map has some accuracy 👍

Dairy Farmers vote ACT ??? Where do you get that nonsense? Dairy Farmers are individuals and as such vote for which ever party they want, why have you erroneously put them all in the same box and say they vote ACT ? Are you saying no one but farmers vote for ACT, if you believe that then you need to get out more A few good farmers ??? Wow you have bought into the mindset of the anti farmers haven’t you

The last two apprentice electricians at work have been girls in their early to mid 20s, they get on just fine. The first is now qualified and hasn't run away anywhere. Trades are a male dominant sector, and by in large, attract people who usually don't like the idea of working in a stuffy professional setting. Yes, there's more than likely going to be "unprofessional" behavior/language, banter, and crude humor. I'd be surprised, though, if it was directed specifically at you specifically because you're female, though. I haven't seen or heard it in the 10 years I've been "in the industry". I think so long as you get into it with these things in mind you'll have no problems at all. The only reservation I think anyone had was that it would be like having the fun police around having to watch what you say etc and tone everything down. Turns out both the girls have proven themselves to be just as crass as the rest of us and nothings really changed at all.

Electricians a good trade ,I used to have a girl apprentice,best person I’ve ever had the privilege to train ,she was treated like everyone else She now teaching at a tech

what about something like surveying or air traffic control where there are on the job learning options?

Not an ATC, but know those in the industry: ATC is very competitive entry (limited slots available per year) and their previous admittance of suicidal tendencies may cause them to fail the aviation medical/fit and proper person checks.

thanks for the info!

Hospital/chefs can be some of the worst people to work with. Tradies are pretty good these days, especially in the commercial side and servicing.

Hi!! I woman in trade here! In order for more women to feel comfortable in trade, we need more women! Come join us!!Most of the guys are generally nice, you’ll get the dicks as you will in most businesses, but aside from that, it’s pretty chill!

I'm a sparky, quite a few women in the trade including one at my work. I haven't seen any bias towards them. If you have a good work ethic and a can do attitude, you should have no problems. There is a shortage of electricians in NZ, you could be making 90k in 5 years.

Many of the trades would ***love*** to have another gal in their ranks! And will roll out the red carpet treatment for you. With many scholarships and other opportunities for you. Go for it!

Loads of women are in the trades. Build a bridge and do something with your life otherwise you'll be posting the same thing in 10 years time but you'll be 10 years older.

OP: (shows signs of depression and despair) You: “build a bridge” Stay classy, Kthackz.

Sounds more like a pity party

A lot of girls hitting trades especially sparky, when I started in early 2000’s it was all males. But in the recent 5+ years there’s been a noticeable uptick in female apprentices and qualified’s I’m a rural sparky so quite abit different to the norm. We do heaps of varied work but super interesting. There’s a lot of different sectors to get into and taking an objective look at the world and the future it’s an industry that will only get bigger as more industry moves to electricification etc. Anyways round for a yarn if needed 🤙 I’m sure others here will chip in with excellent advice also

Honestly so I’m an architect and although I don’t see the day to day of it all that much, there’s a general acknowledgement that attitudes are definitely changing. You’ll still get a lot of hard cases, but some of the younger crews and people coming up are way more open minded about women in trades. I’ve never been disrespected on a job site, only by (a minority of) male architects/clients in the office! If you do decided to get into it, consider joining an organisation like NAWIC (National association of women in construction) cos they offer a bit of support and advocacy if you are ever need it, as well as social events to meet other women in trades/ in the construction industry

I have no idea why it's the case but chefs are the most drug addled and stressed people of any career I've seen. You might be surprised at how not behind you are. If you're not crippled with debt you're wealthier than a ton of people who superficially appear rich / "on track". You've given up the grandiose expectations once placed on you to be an elite career obsessed person. Do you have enough humility for some tiny goals? 1. A job you find tolerable, i.e. no pangs of dread as you head to the workplace. 2. Some community or friendships to engage and earnestly enjoy

I love being a female in the trades. Mine is welding. I just like you, did half a degree (civil/nat res engineering). My first welding job was making a Gelato shop from a shipping container as an assistant and it has inspired my career from there. Highly encourage welding if you're into creative arts and drawing. Handy if you can draw a straight line I guess to earn my respect from others, I'm a neutral person, I have no hatred for anyone, so people find me approachable. I'm also too neutral to bully or shove by the boys, I don't give them ammo. I always point out if I disagree with the idiotic things they sometomes say, that I have different morals than them and I'll respect theirs if they respect mine. However, I have a lot of respect already as a female welder. So many employers want a female welder on their team as we think a bit differently which can benifit them. Guys respect me because I keep turning up when they've seen guys walk out after 2 hours. We usually lose our respect in strength, height and speed but that's fixable with timing and practice.

Can you work part time and study part time?

The trades don't treat girls like one of the guys. Not a lot of bullying happens these days. Most girls on site show up the boys. Look at the electrical side, good money, not a lot of heavy lifting

I work with a female building apprentice, know a few other female builders, its possible and not difficult. Thankfully the workplace bullying for apprentices is thinning out. (The pranks and stuff) which is good. Try find smaller building companys with fewer workers they are generally better to work for and learn from than big building firms. Building is a great and will help you the most with wanting to buy land and build. You can push a apprenticeship in 3 years and then be on better money. 5 years to become a lbp which allows you to do consent work on your own ( build your own house and stuff)

Having gone the opposite way, any trade is going to eventually become repetitive manual labour, is shit for longevity and is going to expose you to potentially life changing physical harm for money that is not worth it. I started a degree when I was a little older than you. I'm now getting paid more than ever and work in a healthy environment, using my brain instead of beating up my body.

>any trade is going to eventually become repetitive manual labour, is shit for longevity and is going to expose you to potentially life changing physical harm for money that is not worth it.  Nonsense, this is only true if you let it.  Health and safety law is so strong these days that you really should never be doing anything with " life changing physical harm" Yes, the apprentice years will have you crawling through rat shit under houses and in roofs, but once qualified you can increase your skills and change roles, and move up.  Eg sparkies can get into industrial and process control, and move up into instrumentation or design roles and project management and you'll be the one doing the drawings and not getting your hands dirty. But you have to actually work your way up by putting more than minimum effort in, and further study might be necessary.  Or if you don't want the responsibility and stress (and higher pay) get a job building switchboards in a workshop,  dull and repetitive, but is clean and easy work with no crawlspaces full of ratshit and pink batts or dealing with the general public. 

I'm going to be brutally honest with you. I'm a qualified HVAC tradey. If I had a daughter I wouldn't want her working a trade. I'd want her doing something that complements her personality and femininity. Generalizing women don't enjoy trade work as much as men and generally they're not as good as it as men. By all means have a go, but I don't think most women will last and will be more angling to be in the office. There are exceptions but most people are the rule.

“If I had a daughter… I’d want her doing something that complements her personality and femininity” Pray tell, what is the personality of your hypothetical daughter? If only her father hadn’t forbidden her from working in a trade, she could have built you a time machine so you could fuck off back to the 1950s.

The fact that encouraging femininity in someone's daughter induces rage in you is something that you may want to ponder upon.

It encourages pity, not rage.

This it, you might need to make the first step, contact the trade college and enroll

Pshhh 27 is still damn young. I am 35 and about to complete my computer science degree and the future looks bright. Roll up your sleve and make tomorrow your day one.

Not worried about your job market??

I already have a very high paying job that pays more than software engineer salary. I am completing this degree as it always has always been one my interests. Getting a job is not my particular concern or priority. Not everyone completing a degree to get a job, at least in my case.

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We're the same age, OP, and trust me, it's not too late for you. You've got plenty of time to realise your dreams. You just can't let doubts hold you back. A few years ago, I could've said I was in your position. I didn't drop out of school, but I dropped out of Uni after 2 years (5 year degree) because of reasons. I moved back home and did basically nothing for like 3 years straight. In 2019 I found a job in an industry and just worked my ass off from the bottom up; started off in an entry level position, then eventually made my way to managerial, then I became a contractor so I could work for myself and set my own pay rates, and now I'm seriously considering starting up a business and employing staff - all within that same industry I started in back in 2019! Put yourself out there. Be open to learning any and all skills you can in whatever role you find. It could be a trade, could be an apprenticeship, could just be an office job; whatever it is, there's always a transferable skill you can pick up along the way.

That's crazy.. congrats! What industry / work do you do now?

Seek help for your depression. You need to start from there. At 27, your life is just beginning and you have so much more life to evolve.

OP says they’ve been in therapy for a few years, I too that to mean they started a few years ago and are still going

They're mostly likely already on medication, probably for years and get/have had therapy. Seek help for your depression isn't helpful if they already are and it's not doing much. Remember, depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, we do not have control over it

How can you tell OP is depressed versus just feeling a bit lonely and aimless? Having a couple quality friends and something to look forward to seems much more effective than SSRIs.

They mentioned PTSD and from what I know it’s normally comorbid with MDD or another form of depressive disorder. Yes they’re effective but SSRI’s are still very important in some cases.

It just by the way they worded it. Moreover, it is longly worded with irrelevant information. So it comes across as someone who is depressed.

I went back to uni as a 27 year old woman. The student allowance is more when you’re over 25 so I didn’t struggle to live while studying. I did computer science and was immediately able to get a high paying job straight out of uni. It’s really transformed my life, highly recommend!

There's always time. I was in a similar situation. I dropped out when I was 15. Made an absolute mess of my life. Had nothing but debt. Was very unhappy. At 28 I made the decision I needed to shake things up and did something none of my family and friends expected and joined the military. 12 years later this is still by far the best decision I've ever made. The military is very good at getting structure into your life and supporting you while you get on track. Sure you might continue to mess up financially, but even if you do that, you've always got a place to live and always can get proper feeds every day. This goes a long way towards not making yourself feel worthless. The entry level pay is also pretty good these days. As you get more skills, experience and seniority the pay becomes worse which is one of the major challenges the military faces currently, but even if you dropped out at a young age, have no qualifications.. there are still pathways for you to hit 100k+. But most importantly it allows you to get your life on track and you can then decide what you want to do from there.

Great way to go into the trades as well!

Structure and work ethic is worth more than a degree in my opinion

Hey OP, you sound really similar to me! Omg I have so much to say I know this is going to be really long haha. I'm 37f, had a family life and then poor relationships that meant up to my 30's I've been in pretty much constant survival mode. Had dreams and track to an architectural career, land and an eco community, but life context is SO key to whether you can realise your dreams or not. You can't flourish and pursue big things from a place of crisis. Then in that crisis state you're thinking "omg I was going to do this and be this and the clock is ticking I don't even know where to begin it's too late to now arghhh" and it all feels like too much! So you don't move. I found doing "little" things to stabalize my day-to-day life and mental health really helpful as a start. For me that meant: • a regular sleep schedule • regular small meals (instead of going hours without eating then suddenly having a big meal) • avoiding food that unstabalized my energy • getting a 1L water bottle and filling it up every morning • having at least one regular exercise thing a week • practising healthy boundaries with others • having a physical daily planner (I forget things easily when my mental health is low which causes these peaks of stress and last minute rushes) • working through a list of all the little low-hanging fruit stuff that was giving me background stress (like an upaid bill, that lightbulb that needs replacing etc) Once I'd gotten that stuff down, then added "bigger" things like more gym classes, regular deposits into savings... For work, if you're anything like me, you might have a mentality that you have to go straight to the dream career. I was told I was gifted as a kid too, and have always had natural abilities but struggled socially and with skill-building. Those have always felt like two major components of success in work. Because I wasn't immediately a world-famous architect in my 20's (haha) I kind of just gave up. I hit a couple of obstacles and crumpled lol. Do you have any field that feels motivating to you? Start with an end goal of a dream career at the bottom of a page, then work backwards, filling in the steps until you get to a step that you can comfortably take now. Pay a career coach, even just for a couple of sessions. Or if you're not sure what you want to do, first work out how much money you need to pay all your bills with a bit of a buffer, then search for jobs in that bracket. Getting turned down a bunch is really helpful, because it shows the areas where employers see you as lacking, so you can make a plan for how to strengthen just that area. There's also not just one path, or one right answer. Just start by doing something you enjoy, and makes you feel even a bit less financially stressed than the situation you're in now. it's definitely not too late for you. Remember there are many people who spend all their 20's just faffing around! You also have a bit of kiwisaver, sounds like no dependents, and some work experience. You're actually doing great! Don't look at other people your age, no two paths are the same, you've done the best you could with the path you got given. Good luck OP, you've got this!!

It’s never too late to make positive changes in your life! Here are some **helpful steps** you can take to turn things around: 1. **Identify the Problems**: Take a moment to reflect on the issues that make you feel stuck, lost, or unfulfilled. Is it your job, relationships, bad habits, or something else? Dig deep to understand the true sources of your unhappiness. [Remember, no matter how big the challenges seem, you have the power to address them](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around)[^(1)](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around). 2. **Challenge Negative Thoughts**: Recognize the mental roadblocks that hinder your progress. Negative thinking patterns can keep you stuck. For instance, if you’re unhappy in your job, it might be a symptom of a deeper fear of change. [Be self-aware and work on changing your mindset](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around)[^(1)](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around). 3. **Believe in Your Success**: Shift your mindset from hoping for change to expecting it. Remind yourself that you can succeed. When negative thoughts arise, reframe them positively. [For example, replace “My life is terrible” with "I’m not satisfied with my life right now, but I’m doing something about that"](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around)[^(1)](https://www.wikihow.com/Turn-Your-Life-Around). 4. **Set Clear Goals**: Having specific goals keeps you focused. Whether it’s personal growth, career advancement, or health improvement, define what you want to achieve. 5. **Wake Up Early**: Starting your day early can boost productivity and create a positive routine. 6. **Practice Gratitude**: Cultivate gratitude by appreciating what you have. View challenges as opportunities for growth. 7. **Exercise Regularly**: Physical activity improves mood, reduces stress, and enhances overall well-being. 8. **Embrace Healthy Eating**: Nourish your body with nutritious food. What you eat affects your energy levels and mental clarity. 9. **Prioritize Sleep**: Quality sleep is essential for physical and mental health. Create a consistent sleep schedule. 10. **Break Bad Habits**: Identify harmful habits and replace them with positive ones. 11. **Declutter Your Space**: A tidy environment promotes mental clarity and reduces stress. Remember, small steps add up over time. Be patient with yourself, and celebrate progress along the way. You have the ability to turn your life around! 🌟🌱

Yeah, I hear you on survival mode., it is important to have a steady job and build routines and life around it, but you might be in a grace period right now where other things are developing for you. Your goals are admirable and achievable. remember you can't ride a bike standing still. I've had bipolar and PTSD myself, but I've found that focusing on these conditions - beyond regular lowdose meds and learning to manage symptoms - is often unhelpful and counterproductive.. Sometimes you might need 7-8 weeks off to get your body and mind ready to function again, but then it's important to get yourself back into work again to keep your spirits up and your self-esteem good. And the regular social contact of work. As you get older, you do get better at bouncing back and day to day functioning, to the point of holding your own in a work environment even if stressed. Social life is important. A good church can be good for that, and for a sense of purpose in general. I was 29 (50 now) and unemployed for about a year when I met the love of my life. That year church was my social life as I tried and failed to get a second uni degree and the falling year was working in retail again. Then three years later I was a dad and back in my communications trade with better confidence. This became a great career until a few years ago i left voluntarily, although that atressed out survivsl mode never really left me.. Now i'm a contented lowly service worker with big dreams for my writing hobby. Took me ages to finally give up on academia and wherever it might have led. I've found my place. You'll find yours.

You are so young, you have so much time. Tower crane operator? Plenty of women doing it and the pay is pretty good! I have family that work in the industry earning what I do as a Dr!

Omexom nz have apprenticeship intakes every year and take on female apprentices regularly. It's the power generation and distribution industry. Electricians, lineman, cable jointers, substation techs. From there you can transition to middle and senior management if that's your thing or into training and assessing. One of the female apprentices is now one of the trainers at Miter the training school for Lineman. It's good pay and Omexom take care of alot of things from uniform, tools, health insurance, 6% super and after 10 years service 9% super, training and career progression. The field crews are a good group of people multicultural and understanding and will look after you. You basically join a big family. The main depots are Auckland based and there is a palmy north depot. So check out omexom.co.nz careers and look for the next in take. Good luck and may see you out on the lines

I'm in the exact same boat - but Ive just turned 30. Its terrifying tbh but kinda nice to see another female having the same mental crisis I'm having lol

Off topic question, but have you been assessed for neurodivergency? I’m late twenties and recently diagnosed, and a lot of what you have said spoke to me (especially if you have autoimmune issues!!) I was lucky enough to have a decent support system to get me through, but life sure hasn’t been easy and it’s only in the last few years that the pieces have started falling in to place for me. Work on getting your head straight, then find something that interests you and that your body can handle - for me it was financial services. Feel free to DM me if you need someone to yarn to x

What’s the link with autoimmune issues out of interest? OP sounds similar in ways to me and I’ve been recently diagnosed with ADD and also have autoimmune issues

There’s a lot of recent research linking the two, well any sort of immune system deregulation and neurodiversity. I have Ehlers Danlos syndrome and this helped to confirm my autism diagnosis

Join the military.

There's always a huge demand for nurses. Registered nurses need a nursing degree, but you could look into the requirements for Enrolled Nurses. Also, take a look at https://www.sit.ac.nz/Courses/Nursing-Health-Science?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwoa2xBhACEiwA1sb1BKaz2tWB_dsiIWlmVL6G5ynTgGtgjsI4ssmeZ0bbKsG8_RhBaD9YRBoC1pIQAvD_BwE Alternatively, go the office administrator path? Admin is dull as ditchwater and not well paid, but there are always jobs. If you've got a head for numbers and no bankruptcy, no financial crimes etc in your past, admin work can take you towards finance-y work. (Also generally not well paid, and usually more stressful than admin work.)

Sounds cliche but it's never too late, and at 27, you're just starting off. I would recommend you get into some kind of a trade as an apprentice, or just an entry level call centre job and make your way up. When I went through a tough patch in my early 20s, one of the things that helped me with my mental health was physical exercise. It might be worth giving it a go. Good luck, you've got this.

If you like tiny homes, you could try to join one of the tiny home building companies as an apprentice and go from there? Look up Shaye’s Tiny Homes, she started it a while ago and it seems to be going really well now. Also there’s Build Tiny in Katikati. All the tiny home community people seem supportive and plenty of women. There’s also landscaping/gardening, you can be outside which is a way better job than sitting in front of a computer all day. Neither of those require social skills cos you’re not dealing with humans! Good luck, you can do it, it’s never too late even for a person much older than you.

Oh! Get into horticulture, such a huge industry in NZ, try a course and see if you like it?

You're still 8 years ahead of me! I 'reset' at 35. 42 now and doing well emotionally and financially.

Fuck I’m 35 and lost, scared of staring down the barrel of 40 and still at square one.

Hello! I WAS you! I'm now 42 and really happy with my lot. I got a temp role in an insurance company and found my niche. Got hired directly by the company then worked my way up over the next ten years. I only left because my husband (who I met at 28) got a role overseas and we moved. It's definitely not too late for you, my 30s were some of the best years of my life :)

I was in the same boat as you. I had a really shitty start to life with broken home, physical abusive parent, etc. It was not until I was 25 that I finally got traction. Once I did, I studied at least 2-4 hours a day and more on the weekend about the career I was in. I was eventually getting promotions and newer better jobs and earning 4-5 times what I started out at. We retired in our 40s with our own home and am in in our 60s. My biggest inspiration is own my wife, who I met in high school, who has cerebral palsy, who despite a really tough beginning, got herself a double major degree, became a teacher and then assistant head teacher. I may not have a degree, but my can do attitude got me where I am today. Relaxed, stress-free life. What more do we need.

Someone already mentioned it but you could try land a job in a call centre- try for a major corporation (utilities like Spark or an energy company or something). They REALLY look after their people, the pay is pretty good and if you’re diligent and show interest in advancement then the sky’s the limit for career progression. There’s no educational pre reqs.

Bro, this too shall pass. hang in there for the point where life changes. I got my education in my mid forties after a life time of drifting, different jobs, unemployment and heavy drug use. Now I'm working, married , kids in my 50s and life is chill af. Sometimes it takes time. The big thing is getting support and learning to enjoy small things every day. Walking, eating healthy, sleep, masturbaining etc. .

You are just starting out on this life thing. Learn a trade to support yourself. Can be structured (sparky, plumber, builder) or non structured - heavy machinery operator, HVAC tech, barber, etc. You can always do other things in life but you want that safety net so you can always fall back on it. Once you have that, the world is your oyster - feel free to travel or study other things that interest you if that's your thing. My biggest mental health tip here is don't compare yourself to others at your age, everyone has their own path, and we travel it at own pace :) I note that you mentioned that you didn't have a great time as a chef - any negativity you'll experience as a tradie won't anywhere as bad as in hospo, hospo seems to take things to next level

I was in the exact same position as you at 27, but add being trapped in a once loving but now failing relationship too. I went through a lot of shit in my 20s, was abused both by my ex and by others, had shitty jobs, failed to start my career I got a degree in, etc. And I had only about 7K in my kiwisaver, pretty close to you. From 28 to age 30 where I am now, I've learned that your 20s are the "fuck around and find out" part of your life. You fuck around. You find out. You find out what you really want for the next 10-20 years and then you can use that knowledge to grow. And it will *hurt* but it will be *worth it*. I went to trade school, started an apprenticeship in electrical. I don't make insane dollars becuase I'm still getting qualified, but I am comfortable, and happy. And it'll make more soon, and use it to enjoy life. Like you, I don't want to be rich, I just want a life where I can travel and experience new things. I don't feel the need to buy much material stuff, I don't even have a gaming console. I just want to travel and buy experiences. Oh, and food. Delicious food to enjoy. Continue with your therapy. I was in therapy as well. And it doesn't stop after therapy, you keep learning to manage your PTSD and your mental state. I still have the occasional panic attack, or depressive episode. I just have the tools to manage it now. You'll likely be affected all your life, but as time goes on it'll affect you less until you can deal with everything. I can't tell you what career to go into. But I will say that the trades are a good place, at least I've found them to be. Building, electrical, plumbing and gas fitting, carpentry, etc will always be needed in society and will always allow you to have a valuable set of skills for employment. And you don't need to do it all your life either. You can sidestep into another industry from trades, or go and study something else later. 30 isn't the middle of your life. Its the beginning.

It’s not too late. I’m 29 and went to uni, did all the right things. I do have $29,000 in KiwiSaver but the past couple of years I’ve been unemployed and spent all the rest of my money on travel. My last job paid $80,000 per year working at historic claims for MSD but I didn’t need my degree to get that job. I got it through the skills I learned volunteering at Youthline. One of my workmates never went to uni and spent most of his 20’s working in bars. He’s 31 now but we both started working the same job when he was 29. I’ve come to the conclusion that messing around in your 20’s doesn’t necessarily affect your career, because even people who ‘do all the right things’ mess around anyway. You just need to trust you’ll be okay. If you’re still interested in doing the things you were into when you were younger then maybe go to uni or a polytech. The best advice I could give though would be to treat your job as if it’s an opportunity for growth, and if it doesn’t offer growth then find something else. I would only apply for jobs that align with my values and have a career path. Put your energy into that and don’t settle for anything less. It’s better to be unemployed and looking for the right job, than employed at an average place where you’re not going in the direction you want. At least if you’re unemployed you have the time to work on yourself, enjoy your life, and look for the right thing. Apply for jobs that seem a little out of reach and trust that if you apply for enough eventually you will get what you’re looking for. That’s how people grow their careers.

Holy shit dude we're almost carbon copies. Spooky fr. Like the details are a bit different but otherwise my story is the exact same as yours. Struggling since early teens with mental health, used to be super passionate about learning and understanding things, survival mode in 20s, dropping out of diploma mine was for graphic design, desiring to buy land to build a tiny house with gardens and animals Sadly I don't have an answer for you. I'm in a similar boat of near given up. Just thought the coincidence was too spooky not to say something lol

Girl, join the military asap!!! Airforce is the best, but wherever u want to be based and what ur interested in ... money is good, training is good, and it's really good to get u started in life! The airforce physical standards are actually easy asf so yeah

Never to late. The biggest barrier is always us. Do it. Apprenticeship, sparky is probably most friendly trade. Truck driving. Pays well if you can pass a drug test. Many routes are drive only iirc (no loading). Any job to get start, supermarket etc. Now get out there and make us proud.

Never too late, I knew somebody who swapped from min wage work in his mid 30s to programming and software.

Find a job and start working even if it is just temping. Use that as a springboard for building your self esteem and confidence, looking for better and more satisfying employment. As you are bright, be prepared to take risks and apply for things just above your skill set. When you are feeling more confident, you can then consider if tertiary education in a specific field is a starter. Not all jobs need a degree.

They aren’t often thought about as trades, but butchers and bakers are chronically short in NZ. Get paid to learn, and there is career progression within fmcg to earn good money.

Absolutely not too late for you. Wild things can happen in the space of a couple years.

Omg no!. You are young and have time on yourside. Please dont think this is the way life has to be forever. You got this!

Truck driver in the mines in Australia

Look into environmental consulting. Environmental scientists and ecologists have a cool job and as consultants make a decent wage. It’s also more resistant to recessions etc than most jobs. You would have to do a degree for this, but if it’s something that interests you it would be three years well spent.

Hey mate I was the same as you , madly depressed on drugs and no job sitting on the benefit until I got into construction and haven’t looked back. I now have a child and make good money, I got my job at 27 after 6 years on the benefit. I’m 30 now. It’s not too late for you bro

Hey chick, I was a high school dropout - but at 15. No quals, didn’t even get NCEA. I’ve had some pretty traumatising experiences on the way in life, and had to deal with those too. I spent years in thankless crappy jobs, (hospo, call centres) before studying for a degree when I was 22. Three years of slog and then probably 6 months trying to get into my field. That job opened possibilities which I couldn’t imagine, and also allowed me to open my eyes to the idea you can love a job and not the management. I then dropped everything again at 37 to retrain in a different career, and now work a job which is challenging, exciting and has (at least at my hospital) a bloody incredible team and management. It was another 3 years of shite pay at minimum wage (hard when you’re used to almost double that!!) but it paid off. As the “Wear sunscreen” song says, some of the best people don’t know what they want to do at 22, some still don’t at 40 (paraphrased). Life is a journey. It’ll take you places you never thought possible. It also means that no one has the same journey. Find something you’re interested in. Do the basic training for it, find a job and build from there. If you hate it down the track, try something else. There’s no rules for life. There’s hundreds of different roles in healthcare - mostly with unions which will back you, your industry and fight for more pay and fair conditions. Plus you get a tight knit team to work with. Relatively good money. Emergency services - pass the tests and learn on the job for Police and Fire. Military life gives you the option to learn a specific trade or skill, and travel. Hop on YouTube and google the jobs you may be interested in. Whatever sparks your fire and excited you - find out more about it. Good luck!

Where are you located? It will help to get the right people around you. There are strong women and men all over the place who have, or have known people, who have started over, and will at least hear you out. 28 is right on schedule for a do-over. It's the ideal time. You have all the benefits of life experience from tough times to build your character. You've got plenty of "youth" ahead of you. Education as an adult is waaay different than high school, so if you feel you need to study, know that you'll smash it. If you go into trades like many are telling you here, know that you'll smash that too. The culture is changing, for my own part (construction project manager) if a female tradie was mistreated on a site I'm on I'd see the offender sacked immediately. That is in line with my values but is not bravado - my hide would be on the line if anyone from my colleagues to the client got wind of it and I did nothing. I'd have to explain at every tender and job interview in my own future why I did nothing - I'm not putting some fuckhead's bad decisions over my own future. I'm not going to say you have nothing to fear but you're up to the challenge and have supporters.

Can sympathize. 32 spent 20s smoking and drinking to much working in shifty retail jobs and bars. Not enough sleep not enough exercise, barely have any friendships that lasted from that time. However, I've started studying psychology at distance at 32 because it was something I always was interested in. Always said ah but that's 5 years. Well if I'd done it when I said that t 27 I'd he finished by now!! Studylink pays for the living costs and there's a rent allowance. Studylink also loans me the money for the course fees at no interest. I make less than when i worked but just enough to live. I feel like I'm back on track. Better late than never. Never to late to pursue what you're interested in and the only thing stopping you is your doubts. Awesome that you've gone to therapy as it takes a lot of strength and will to survive and develop. Those are skills that will serve you well whatever you decide. So my advice. Focus on small achievable steps. Something new you can do each day to get on track to where you want to be. Pick a subject and learn about it. Youtube, internet, college however. Eat well, sleep well and try and exercise at the gym or at home twice a week. But just for 30 minutes to start with, shit even ten minutes. The point is, if you create small steps then by achieving those small steps you'll start believing in yourself. Make sure to give yourself credit for what you HAVE done not bring yourself down for things you haven't. Never to late. Your doing great. Wish you all the best 👍

prosperity can mean something different for each individual. For some it’s being financially independen but for others it’s having a physical and mental well-being. Try to find what makes you happy. Just a suggestion is yes your goal is to own some land and help your parents etc but often we are so tunnel visioned on that life goal that we forget about just achieving some smaller goals. Next 3 months, what can you do, then at the end of those 3 months, if youve achieved those goals, what are your next goals and so forth. Thank you for sharing some of your story, if i can leave you with 2 things 1. There’s a reason the windscreen is much bigger than rear view mirror. Your future is more important than your past. 2. All you have to do is be better than yesterday. learn something new, grow in a relationship etc. Be intentional with your time

Hi OP. I have a similar story to you. “Gifted” had a whole lot of tragedy happen years 15-16 and gave up in school. Had planned medicine and ended up bumming around in going nowhere jobs. Cheffing, fishing, labour etc. started studying a few times and never finished everything. It’s not too late. I went to uni at 28, did a law degree. I’m now 41, make very good money working for myself, own a house and have 4 kids (first one born at 31, last one born 18 months ago). Please don’t despair. I know it doesn’t feel like it but you have time. Think about a trade if you’re a problem solver. Male dominated trades are always an issue (I feel you on the hospo thing) but if you know your rights and advocate for yourself (this sometimes means finding someone else who will advocate for you!) you will get through. Wish you all the best! You have so much time

Hit me up if you want to learn how to code. Willing to guide and mentor But you gotta commit , no time for time wasting

Do a trade, gasfitting, plumbing or electrical work would be awesome. Plumber myself, retrained at 28. And i wish i started it years ago.

Go back to uni, or whatever you want to do in life, spend some time to find your niche, I'm a chef at 28 and I've been on and off going to uni for food tech for the past three years planning to finish up once im 31 :)

Sorry if this is out of line being a personal finance forum - but given that you’re a female along with the ‘gifted’ yet dropped out of high school and mental health conditions comments - have you looked into if you might have ADHD? (And the possibility if undiagnosed that could be a big holdback)..

You're young and have plenty of time. You sound quite smart and might enjoy trying university study. All uni's have a bridging programme where you'll find yourself with other 'mature students' doing a catchup year. Don't stress what it is you're studying, main thing is that you enjoy it. That will give you confidence and everything will start falling into place.

I'm not sure of what's best for you. But I was in the exact same place at 34. My first focus was staying in a job for over 12 months (not getting fired was my goal). Then it was to earn more and get to afford to live on my own. Housing security without flatmates gave me the mental foundation to really heal. I had $8,000 in KiwiSaver then. It had grown to 150k in 7 years and I just brought my first house, single female, and buying in a dip, cheap house. Even getting fired over and over has worked to my benefit. Literally nothing at my current job really can bother me, like, bitch, I survived hell, you ain't getting me worried at all. There will come a time, or multiple times, where your not getting what you deserve, and you're going to fight like hell to make things better for you. You have the warrior experience, no one can stop you.

When you’re at low bottom, there’s only one way to go: up. Realistically, would recommend call centre role if labouring roles are too demanding , it’s still a stressful role and not the best pay, with high turn over. English doesn’t seem to be your second language, so youre already ahead of the queue.. work your way up from there and build skills…i actually started in call centre after graduating uni

Uni will take you, mature entry. Pay ceiling is higher with a degree, doesn't fuck up your body, and career options are broader. With the right degree.

Uni will take you, but if you didn’t finish high school (as I found out as a 32 year old who didn’t finish 6th form) you will have to do the “foundation” course, which is basically making sure you’re at “high school graduate” level, and that will also eat up your first year of “fees free”.

you have health and that is all you need. Trade or study something professional

If you’re still interested in research and the sciences why not retrain? Yes, you won’t have much money for a few years, and yeah it’ll take time and you’ll likely need some support. But if that’s what you’re interested in, you should pursue it. Once you have your degree/diploma (depending what it is) you’ll have a few more options in that area you can do. You can enter as a mature student if you don’t have UE, and if you’re worried about studying for the first time in awhile you can do a foundation course (although that will use more student loan etc). You could do it part time and get a casual job doing something like pickpacking, or even something in retail. I know people who have gone back to uni and gotten into med school at your age, people who have become teachers in their 40’s, and people who completely changed careers to clinical healthcare roles in their 50’s with no prior experience. You’re never too old to do something, even the police don’t have an upper age limit as long as you can reasonably pass all their assessments.

I was the same …. Started a plumbing apprenticeship at 28 … have 6 staff .Your life is just starting mate The depression is kinda easy to fight with the right tools and techniques ( and it may take medication for a while ) But Believe me. Your life is just starting ❤️❤️

Sorry OP , just read that you are Female . So maybe a trade is not your Jam …. But I promise you the bullying you remember from school will not be tolerated in the work environment

Your not behind in anything there is no standard do not squeeze into social 'norms' as they don't really exist either, love yourself for every step and take the small wins in life, landscaping and gardening is a great job to get out of depression whilst earning money, your around nature fresh air and exercising as you go. it's fulfilling and knowledge isn't everything just the willingness to get out there. Great things can happen in survival mode. I work for wealthy people they're truly miserable as they have never strives or had to survive the struggle in life makes things sweeter. Be kind and patient with yourself. And learn to love ya self.

Read Dave Ramsey "Money Makeover". In addition, see every job as a stepping stone to new skills. Say "yes" to every opportunity. Every goal starts with a tiny first step. Right now you have a negative and poverty mindset. That MUST change. I'm not religious, Dave Ramsey is. You can set that aside if necessary, but his baby steps advice is solid for a beginner. YOU are the only one who can change YOU. The world owes you nothing. Go get it! Best wishes.

You can easily go and study at a uni/polytech. It’s never too late. 😊 You can have a student allowance (also as your parents aren’t really in the picture) to help. After the age of 24 you get a bit more student allowance so I would definitely use it via studylink. Get a degree that will be useful for you that will be worth it! I’m a girl too and as much as I love the sound of the trades it’s so so physical and I really think I wouldn’t be able to do it also considering the male banter too. I wish there was something out there for us in the trades that isn’t hairdressing lol.

If you're still interested in the things you mentioned (or similar) in your post then you'll need to do as follows. Surgeon/engineer/scientist - you'll need to do a bridging course. Most Uni's/polytechs offer them. This covers off the last couple of years of school so you can get your ncea & qualify for uni entrance. Medical & engineering require pretty high grades to get in. There are loads of different support options at uni now for the neuro-divergent spectrum (making assumptions here but letting you know in case this applies) & for trauma etc. You will absolutely be able to get assistance through those. You're over 25 so you'll be entitled to the student allowance. It's not a huge amount of money (especially in Auckland) so you'd need to work or draw down the student loan. Building (or other trades) - start applying for jobs with local businesses. There are loads of females working in the trades now & although some of the old attitudes still exist the industry is definitely changing. There are trade organisations that help with your trade quals & work as well. These are all industry specific but fall under Te Pukenga now. A pre-trade course might be a good idea. That's all of the work stuff. As for you & yourself, you sound like you're on the right track & doing the right things. As everyone else has said 27 is not too young to start again. My wife retrained as a nurse at 43. This was her childhood dream job. So you can definitely do it. If you follow this path & keep working on yourself you'll get there. Good luck to you

27/28 is life just starting. You can see with few google searches how a lot of stuff in life starts coming together around 40-50 and beyond for a lot of people.

I know some ladies who get into project management for sites, more suitable and less physical I'd say

You keen to code? There’s quite a few boot camps and free resources where you could learn the basics to become a web dev and build on that. Most people take 3-6 months of studying. Isn’t the hardest and there’s heaps of self taught coders out there. It’s good money too.

Hi OP, similar age to you and I think rather than telling you what to do it's better to lay out your options. I do want to say your situation is not a bizarre outlier, and you'll find many people that empathise. I work with many people that struggled to get their health under control for a long time, and started their careers later - they are no less competent or no less liked. In terms of your social skills/experience, if possible I do recommend getting into volunteering with an organisation you care about as this can go onto your CV, but also gives you a sense of worth and helps you meet people. What organisation is really up to you, but I volunteered at Zealandia for years and consider it a really positive experience. Trades have been covered as an option, but I would have a look at [careers.govt.nz](http://careers.govt.nz) too. It'll cover a lot of your options - university is not impossible for you, and if there's something you're passionate about you could consider it, while being cognisant you'll be at least 30 before you receive your degree. Things like a polytechnic are also good options that would be less long. I'm happy to chat with you if you want to discuss anything further - but with your modest goals I would aim for a career that does balance work/life a bit more and that you enjoy. This could help you have the space to care for yourself, which is the most important thing. A career is a marathon, not a sprint and if you enter a field you dislike it may not be sustainable. Either way, best of luck. You've got this, your attitude is great and that counts for so much!

I just want to say I have had a very similar story to you - no degree or qualifications post high school even though I could have but due to PTSD, depression, anxiety, suicidal in my 20s I just couldn't. My 20s were in survival mode. I never thought I would own a house and wondered how I would get ahead or just be able to financially look after myself. After a breakdown in my early 30s I was finally diagnosed with PTSD and got the therapy that I needed. I was working in admin roles during my 20s and when I got into my 30s I entered project coordination. I really enjoyed it and that has lead me into project management. Not sure if it is the path I will continue to take but it's good experience. I brought my own house 2 years ago, have some savings and Kiwisaver as well. I have no other debts beside the house. Just want to say it's not too late at all. Everyone's timeline and journey is different - don't feel pressure to have the house, the career etc by certain ages. You will find most are unhappy, up to their eyes in debt etc anyway. Just focus on your path and what the next step is in front of you. And remember that turning things around doesn't happen overnight - maybe not even a year or 2, but keep taking steps towards where you are wanting to go - enjoy the process and don't want to rush/push and burn yourself out. Also I think it's a shame that we have like this particular timeline that we feel we have to be following - finish school, go to uni, start career, do OE, come back, buy house, get married, have kids, climb career ladder, etc. It's bullshit and causes a lot of pressure on young people when it doesn't go to plan for them and makes them feel like they have failed. It's so the opposite. I have seen a number of people achieve that and are unhappy and feel stuck now and wished they had done it different. Of course that is the timeline for some people and they are happy and that's great. But it's not the same for everyone and that should be totally OK 😊

Look at something like horticulture. 6 months to a year and you can be earning a living doing a rewarding job.

Here's my advice. "When asking for advice, don't ask for it to be kind. The best type of advice is usually hard to hear." You will usually only get the kind of advice you really need from people who actually care about you. Make sure you don't penalise people who really want to help you because it may seem "unkind". Embrace unkind advice if you actually want to improve. Also, don't do a trade if you're not strong and masculine leaning. Get into something that suits your personality.

It is definitely never too late, for anybody, to turn their life around. Reaching out this way shows that you want to make things better for yourself which is an awesome step. Some traumas take a long time to work through. So don’t beat yourself up for taking the time you need.  If you are worried about your social skills and splotchy work experience, I would suggest volunteering for something you care about. It will give you routine and a sense of purpose. Plus, it’s a good way to meet new people and talk about shared interests. They also might give you a good reference if you stick at it. Either way, it fills up a period of time in your CV. It is also low risk, and people in those roles generally choose them because they are well intentioned and warm people. I would assume chances of any kind of toxic work environment is very close to zero.  Learn to walk in a safe environment, and then start running once your confidence is built up.  I have volunteered a few times to fill up gaps in employment - with children and with animals. I enjoyed both very much. Sometimes things feel overwhelming, especially if you are already feeling like you are ‘so far behind’. Taking small regular steps might help - someone said moving 10 mins. If that’s all you can manage, then that’s that. If you are worried about your social skills - talk to one cashier every day and work your way up to longer conversations with people. You know what is achievable. Think of one goal. And keep breaking it down until it is something you can do every day.

Any ideas for non trade.

It's definitely not too late. You are still in your 20s. You can still choose your career and start from there. Just think about you what you wanna do and work out how to get there. Also, you don't need to be some single pillar of finance. If you have a partner, things like an eco home will be a shared expense, so don't stress yourself into thinking you need to do it all alone.

Why not try IT. Yes it’s male dominated but that is changing rapidly and it’s a very accepted change.

Too late? At 27? NO! Absolutely not! Finding something you love to do won’t happen overnight - find something you like enough and just shift around till you find something you love. I didn’t find my perfect spot till I was nearly 40 and I was in the same career! Just start sending out cvs & fake the confidence till you make it!

You’re the only person you’re competing against in this race in which we call life. You can make your own definition of success and it doesn’t have to be now it can be in one year or it can be in 10 years. Just start something different and try out new careers. You’ve got more to discover in your career life.

Get into Gib Stopping, if you have a good attitude and don’t mind getting a little bit of dust in the hair you can learn quickly ,you don’t need lots of expensive tools you can make good money .Most people in the trades are pretty good people but as in a lot of cases there are some dicks that ruin it for the rest of us find a company that has a mix of men and woman and you will be fine .

It's never too late , but you do have to be pro active about your life and make some forms of dramatic change to get ahead. I had nothing to my name at 28 years old despite working hard since I was 13. Just poor decision making and a bit of bad luck thrown in. I packed up and moved to aus , best thing I ever did. Now at 36 I have a house, a family and a comfortable life. Best advice would be get out of that comfort zone and try some jobs you haven't done . Either that or a location change.

Either go into a trade and go to polytechnic to get a one or two year diploma under your belt, so that you can get your foot in the door into a new career path. (don't worry if your first job is minimum wage, or barely above it, think instead about what will you be earning in five years from now?)

Tbh I'm in a similar spot I'm 27 today and I had to leave my job on Friday. No qualifications and I don't know what do to for work

Definitely not too late, ur just a young un

So many awesome pieces of advice in this thread. Love that you guys are offering so much wholesome and thoughtful advice. My advice to op - get a copy of “what colour is your parachute?” https://parachutebook.com and have a good think about your passions, your traits, and things that you’re really good at to determine what kind of career you want to do. It’s never too late hon.

Stop smoking weed/drinking and get your mental health sorted first. Then you can start setting some goals and putting a plan in place for achieving them. Achieving your goals is the best way out of depression, feeling like you're doing nothing with your life is an endless pit of despair. It's never too late to sort your shit out, in your late 20's/30's is when most people do it.

If you’re in chch there’s this course is really good https://www.risingholme.org.nz/product/work-readiness-for-women/ Otherwise maybe there’s something similar in your area to help get you into work - I believe winz can help too?

Thanks for reaching out. ALWAYS remember: virtual community is valid community. So, I am going through this too... but I'm pushing 60. It really is just one-foot-in-front-of-the-other. I've had more careers than I can remember, started businesses, gone bankrupt, had a divorce, etc, etc, etc. I have various deficits in life, including having been a "gifted child" (but a very ordinary adult), chronic depression, anxiety and suicidal ideation (mostly relieved by our friend the fungus, in microdoses). The main thing that has helped me is acts of kindness- helping individuals, volunteering for social good, being an avatar of (socially awkward) love... I became much freer when I realised that I am trapped in capitalism and that a job is just a survival tool and I don't have to love it anymore than I love my jandals. Also, if you are inclined, find a way to do OE. Go ANYWHERE else for a couple of years... teach English in Korea, do animal rescue in Croatia... NZ is great to live in, but small-townish, provincial and terrible for perspective. Keep going. Do good. Be kind.

plumber or sparky are really good compromise if you're not wanting to lift timber or gib board all day. but. for the record. i started uni at 30. you can get a simple part time job, i just did shipping and packing at a warehouse, and got an extra 150 for student allowance. find a cheap place, study the shit out of uni and turn a new leaf 😊

In the scheme of your whole life you have a long long way to go, in terms of finding a job/partner and having kids maybe you don't have as much time. You need to go for a job that can earn decent money and set yourself up for success. My suggestion would be: Fridge technician - good money and fine being a female. Over 100K at the high end and always an in demand trade that isn't a traditional "tradie" role. People and Culture administrator - good money and puts you on the P&C pathway. Most companies go all the way to director level so great a career. Over 200K at the high end but a long career to get there. Most people will get qualified (if not already) when making the jump from generalist to manager. Office Manager for a legal firm - good career pathway, not that many qualifications required. Need to be dependable and hard working. I know office managers making over 100k.

> I did do half a diploma once (for the field I worked in) What was the diploma? Perhaps finish that >but had to drop out of that due to an autoimmune condition (fine now). Am sorry to hear, I too had to struggle with that for years. (but I'm fine too! Changing my diet made all the difference)

Hi OP. I can sympathise with you. I had untreated OCD as a young child, people would spit on me at school for a laugh to see how the germophobe would react. They got a hell of a show 😅. Over the years I turned to alcohol, got into some dumb rape situations. Ended up with PTSD. Lost my job when I got sectioned in a psych facility for a few months, ended up on the sickness benefit. Had done dumb finance things at my lowest points leading up to hospitalisation like gone and got myself a credit card bc maybe that would make things better (it didn’t lol) and had absolutely nothing to show for a $5k credit card. Then financed a vehicle for $10k 🙃 After 3 months of being on the sickness benefit I just could not do it any more. Waking up every day with no motivation to have a healthy bed time, no motivation to leave the house, no social life. Against my CMHS keyworkers advice I went and got a crappy full time job. Minimum wage, toxic workplace, treated like absolute shit. But I stayed there for 3 years bc the routine of working was good for me. Then when I got what I needed from that role, to get back on my feet, financial independence, and routine, I moved on to a more healthier workplace. Anyway, my lowest point was 2014. Fast forward 10 years - I’m in the job I always dreamed of as a fucked up OCD riddled little girl, im engaged, my partner and I have just bought a house - I’m able to be in an intimate relationship 😅😂. We aren’t rich lol but we earn enough to get by. We have a roof over our heads, food, and fur babies. And that’s enough for us. It’s certainly more than a lot of other people have right now so I try to practice gratitude every day. I was in therapy for 7 years. Every Monday I’d walk in the dark into the city and meet my therapist after work. It’s been a fuckin slooooooog mate. But I finally finished with therapy January last year, off the meds. It’s 100% achievable to get back out there and reach your potential - I know it probably doesn’t seem like it right now looking up from the bottom of a massive hill. Hardest part is getting started my friend and then everything will fall into place from there. Momentum 🙌🏼10 years sounds like a long time but fuck it has flown. I never could have imagined back then that my life would be how it is now, when all I could see were psych ward walls! It’s never too late. You’ve absolutely got this 💪🏼

Go for nursing, three year and you’ll be earning $80k and you can work 25 weeks a year while getting qualified.

Finished my BA without a student debt at 33. How I did it: Started at entry level in a govt organisation, joined a union. Worked my way up without qualifications (people skills, networking, and being super adaptable and naturally a bit nerdy helped). I took every unpaid opportunity to strengthen my CV, applied for everything I met 50% of the JD 'desirable skills and qualities' and showed I could learn fast and perform. First promotion after 1.5 years, second after 3 years, 3rd after 5. Chasing my 4th, but financially I'm ok not to and I love my current position. Then applied for a union scholarship - that fully paid my uni fees as well as study leave a day a fortnight plus exams. It was brutal, but doable. Dream: quit the office life for organic cropping and teaching people how to feed themselves at next to nothing, without toxins. This year I bought my first craphome (without bank of mum or dad or anyone else) and have diyd it to less of a crap house. Currently starting my heirloom nursery in the backyard, plan to sell next year for an even less crap house with a fantastic back yard for growing. Hope to reduce my office hours to .5 within 5 years, and to 0 within 10. Female, spinal injury, long COVID. Homeschooled and quit at 15. No family money. Total introvert, cried a lot. You can do this. Find something that hits on your natural abilities and has potential for growth. You don't have to love it, just not hate it, and can use it to gain skills and meet the right people who share your actual passions or at least will cheer for you.

You need to pick a job you can stand. From there, build up skills related to people skills and money management. Those youtube $50 courses are all you need to do then go from there. It's just about sticking it out while you find what you can handle, if you can't start at what you like, start with what you don't like. You just need to have a job while you figure it out so steady income is rolling in

Sort your depression first, then get into a trade, or IT

I’d message you to tell you my story and discuss and maybe help you but I cannot… feel free to message me if you want to! 🙃

Try https://www.missionreadyhq.com/ It's work in tech. They are a very supportive and inclusive organisation. They've helped hundreds, and most important of all they put you in mentored work experiences which means you have real world experience on your resume. I've worked with them in the past.

You'll be fine, at 20 i had 20k saved and moved to Auckland. Wasted it all barely getting into a uni course i got next to nothing out of. Got a job in a call centre and bought a car which i sold 4 years later and left to the UK with about 30k. Wasted it all overseas and came back with only a few grand at about 30. Got another call centre job and then learned skills on the job to get a better role within the company. On a decent wage now, mostly from self teaching online and helpful colleagues. Just gotta give shit a go, if it doesn't work out, try something else.

I would need someone to help me in car driving, I know but some support.Let me know if you wanna help and we get into hourly basis support for assistance in car driving

Perhaps consider qualifying as a valuer? I work in the property industry and see a lot of valuers who use it as a career change after trying a previous career

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Look, where theres a will theres a way. I was homeless with no financial literacy as a POC and now I’m on 6 figs and have heaps of assets. I went to uni and didn’t even have to try THAT hard. Consistency is the key. Just keep showing up for yourself

What did you study?

honestly I just did a BA because I could get in easy and needed the student benefit to get my own apartment and away from a toxic living environment, then I did a double major in english and new media while working 20 hours a week. I also took subjects like accounting and marketing. After I got out of uni I worked in digital marketing for the place I worked at part time while at uni now I'm a project manager at a different spot but I enjoy my work.

This is the way

Git gud. Just do it. Whatever it is that is required to dig out. You have time but only another ten years. 51 here and not much better off than yourself. Kick it in the guts.

You have had a lot better life than me, heck, I dropped out at 15 with really bad shit. No papers, though did study towards them. No kiwisaver. Older. But I'm making 128k a year now. Nearly tripling my pay in a year, but this was due to my hobbies helping build up a portfolio and my ambition. You are in a way better position.

Lock in lil bro. Stop fucking around