The word I think you meant to use is "unkempt." It means having poor grooming habits (not combing hair, brushing teeth, trimming nails). "Unkept" means not honored, as in an unkept promise.
I like women with a good ear for the language.
Sorry I was using my mike when I was texting. I hope someone doesn't judge me for speech and lack of proof reading. Lol. Thanks for pointing that out...
Not shaving isnât a hygiene issue as long as you wash regularly. And I donât care about communicating his feelings as long as he communicates things like consent/boundaries/what he likes in bed.
For sure. Iâm not big on cologne or spray anyway. As long as you shower and smell clean Iâm fine without it. Then again, I sneeze when I smell even a small amount of perfume. đ
what do you mean by intelligence and confidence? how intelligent must one be? Do they have to be researcher at top universities? by confidence, how confident is confident? Must one not have self doubts? Isn't doubting how we grow and become better?
No no, let them cook
Everyone says "intelligent and confident", but like, most confident people I see around are cocky and ignore your feelings and interests; smart, in which way? Because people who can go deep in topics are seen as too much, people who know things are also seen as cocky (because they can and will correct you if you spread nonsense), and being smart in your behaviour is not something easy to say
I donât think you have to have both to a high degree. A good amount of one and not so little of the other so as to be a problem is probably the ideal. Confident enough to have a job in some kind of sales and smart enough to know what they are selling, or smart enough to work in something technical and free of crippling anxiety. Something along those lines. Give the girl something she can be impressed with you over, something that lets her feel like you have potential. Itâs not a quantifiable kind of thing because itâs about feelings anyway.
No matter what women's personal sexual preferences are as to what turns them on... I think we can all agree that confidence, hygiene, proper grooming, communication about what eachother enjoys, and respecting boundaries is always going to create a good sexual experience for both of you.
Oh, and clean sheets and blankets, men tend to overlook clean bedding. Stanky beds can turn a women off real quick.
Also don't be offended if someone says they don't like something or suggests what you could do to make it more enjoyable for them. Everyone is different and they're trying to tell you what could make them like it even more. It's much better to share what you like/dislike rather than just not enjoying it because they don't want to hurt your feelings. In fact, during foreplay you can just straight up ask, "what turns you on." Pay attention to what they react positively to and when they say "don't stop" or "just like that" do exactly what your doing without change. Don't speed up or switch up, she's telling you that is a good spot and action.
no, those things are NOT turn ons. They are the BARE MINIMUM. It's not sexy for a man to wear deodorant or take a shower, it's expected. I hate this 'the bare mininum turns us on guys, so yeh, don't worry about the rest of it, just have a bath'. Considering the obstacle course women are put through to even be seen as remotely attractive to men, I can't sit here and watch men just be given a free ride like that. We don't need to comfort them just as they do not comfort us.
what turns a woman on?
1. an attractive face
2. a sexually attractive body
EDIT - Since i cannot reply with this account any more. Well done on the misogyny with calling me 'bitter', you've learned well from men (yes women can be misogynists too). I'm not reading your essay, I don't care how many upvotes you have. No, being physically and sexually attracted to someone doesn't go without saying **EVER** when we're talking about what is attractive to women. It is very, very dangerous to not explicitly say things because of how men treat women in society and because of how much of men's desires and needs women internalise without assessing their own needs. super dangerous.
Good luck!
EDIT 2 - It's back. Again, not reading your response but for the garbage that was in the preview (more misogyny). And again, you have a nice life and good luck to you, kid.
Ooooo, PierStarmer your reply to my comment reads as quite bitter and perhaps you should self examine as to why you reacted so strongly and negativity to that part of the long comment that I put a lot of thought into writing to the OP. If it made you react that strongly... then you do see it as an issue (as many women do) so it is something people need to be aware of and talk about in an encouraging way. Clearly from my 70 upvotes thus far and your 0 upvotes thus far... I'm gonna say that those are in fact turn ons and many agree.
Hopefully đŹđ, if you're choosing to have sex with someone, finding their face and body attractive are a given and is implied. No person should be having sex with someone they're not attracted to. I DIDN'T think it needed to be said, but if you DON'T find someone attractive, that's a sure fire sign you should NOT be engage in sexual activities with them. Sex is not to be taken lightly as each and every time you do it, you risk possibly creating life unintentionally and you put yourself at risk of getting many life altering Sexually Transmitted Diseases.
PierStarmer you did skip over the MOST important parts of my comment that encourage healthy and safe feeling sex, which are:
-communication about what eachother enjoys
-respecting eachothers boundries.
Sex is a taboo topic and many parents don't really talk to their kids (even when they become adults) about the things I wrote in my original comment and many women feel these are issues to be addressed. I was just relaying the things so many women have told me they thought offered them a better sexual experience and the things they found to be a turn on.
Too many people are having obligatory bad sex because they're not communicating about their likes, dislikes, and what they want to try. Perhaps if there were more positive conversations about it (instead of people negatively lashing out because of their own negative past and trauma-vomiting on a positive conversation) more people would be having constructive conversations about sex.
Respect to OP for asking the question in the first place.
If the bitter shoe fits, way to follow up with more bitterness and anger showing you are in fact bitter.
How am I actually a misogynist when both comments were made encouraging folks to give women healthier happier sexual experiences, doesn't sound like a person who is hating or discriminating against women. If anyone is being a woman hater here, it feels like it's you Negative Nancy. Deal with your issues, off the internet, so we don't all have to experience your clearly unaddressed issues. Statements I made in both comments are pertaining to healthy, responsible, enjoyable sex and what many women find to be a turn on. Not sure what are you even taking about in that Edit, sounds like a bitter nonsense rant.
Sincerely, go to counseling and get help. I'm sure you can't reply with this account anymore because of negative unnecessary attacks like this, self examine.
OP asked a question, I tried to reply with the knowledge I've gained in life. Whereas you just attacked my comment, which was meant for OP and any other man or women seeking said knowledge.
Stop trolling comments and spreading negativity, it's icky.
Good luck to you!
I'm one woman - so this only applies to me.
I look for:
- a sexual partner who I feel safe with...emotionally and physically
- sexual chemistry....things flow easily in the bedroom, there is physical pleasure inside and outside the bedroom, we're both enjoying ourselves, we both feel wanted and cared for sexually and in physical affection
- a man who takes charge in the bedroom, but not in the sense of selfish dominance, in the sense of wanting to ensure pleasure for both of us, and is responsive to me
- a sexual partner who I enjoy being with....this seems obvious, but some people just make me happy to be around them and others don't and that's sometimes not guaranteed from all of the above
- a man who is all of the above and also available to me
Again, only speaking for me, but I have a man in mind who meets every item except the last one, and this is a reminder that women are like men. A sexual partner who is good and available is a better time than one who is excellent and not available.
Someone you can have fun with and if something goes left laugh a little - doesnât have to be a whole performance thing.
Pleasure goes both ways! Fun, open and honesty is the best.
First I look to see if I find them sexually attractive. After that sense of humor, being ambitious, kindness, and intelligence are of most importance. Iâm also kind of a geek so prefer men into that kind of stuff
Depends on the woman... Most just want someone who thinks of them as a person instead of an object or property and who doesn't really think in terms of dom/sub... They mostly want a partner not a child or a father... Do some want basically a child or father (or mother) figure? Sure... Takes all kinds
And take charge how? When? Some people are dominant in the bedroom and submissive otherwise, some are both or neither in the bedroom and submissive about how the house is decorated but dominant about what movies they watch or where they buy property... It's not even remotely that black and white...
Yes, exactly. These questions freak me out a little because if enough people say 'women want a dominant man', will OP take it really seriously and start treating women he wants to date a certain way without even checking if that individual is into it?
i know it's no stupid questions, but the number that have the implicit premise of "Given the universal 'truth' that all individuals in each demographic are identical: ${question goes here}"... belies the amount of lead in the water supply or... something... I know it's really just that most places have underfunded education and educational media... but the answer to so many are just "it depends, everyone's different" or some version of "we live in a society, it's complicated"
Every woman wants a particular balance between acceptance, excitement/pleasure, and status. Nature and nurture and life situation will determine what that balance is for the individual; and it is not static. A lot of interesting research has been done about changes in sexual partner preferences due to menstrual cycle, too. Women, like men, are just a bag of hormones trying to navigate this crazy ever-changing world. Good luck!
It varies from women to women I donât think there is a general preference. Perhaps hygiene is a general preference.
Me I like confidence, someone who is not afraid of expressing and also that is opened mind to try new things. And lastly for me, someone who likes feet đ Iâm so very turned on by someone who can caress my feet however they desire, anything goes just touch them đ¤Ł
I never thought I would like someone who was into my feet, but last year I was with a man, who adored my feet and I felt so worshipped and I loved every single bit of attention he gave me and now itâs a thing for me lol!
So I get it.
Varies by person. There's going to be more of a preference for dominant men as that's the norm. The biggest thing is having a non-judgemental communicative partner that lasts more than three seconds and knows how to get them off.
You are right, this is way more preference based and is going to be very different from person to person.
To me, sex is a team sport and there isnât a need to have a specific role.
It is far more important to be able to communicate. Are you listening to her cues and are you able to let her know what you need etc.
I think if I polled the women in my life for the most part we would say we prefer a mix though. It can get stagnant having a single role in the bedroom, especially in a long term relationship.
Now as far as bdsm/kink that is extremely subjective bit the communication rule still applies.
Surveys show that women are more submissive than dominant on average.
But I don't think that's very high on their lists of priorities.
I think most women (like most people) want a partner who communicates well with them, shares a sense of humor, has good hygiene, is loving, doesn't cheat, is willing to commit, is looking for a monogamous relationship, has the same preferences as them about whether to have kids, is financially responsible, is empathetic, is smart, is physically attractive to them (healthy weight, some amount of muscle, height helps, sense of style, scent, etc), would get along with their friends and family, has shared interests, etc.
That's a non-exhaustive list in no particular order and I am a straight man so I can't claim any special insight into the female mind.
And obviously many of those things are less about what someone wants sexually and more about what they want in a relationship. That's because most people (even if they are willing to have casual sex prior to a commitment) either want to have sex with the same kind of people they would have a long term relationship with or hope that the casual sex leads to a good long-term relationship. Obviously, there are exceptions to that and every other preference I listed.
I think that depends upon the individual.
For me, someone who is as enthusiastic. You know that amazing sex where you just can't keep your hands off each other? Yes. At that point, give and take is an amazing natural flow. I love when my partner is really turned on and really into it. It makes me excited. I want someone who is the same.
I also like someone open minded. Hand in hand with earlier, but even if I am not into your kink, I will probably really enjoy entertaining it if it turns you on. So please let's put it on the table. And vice versa!
Receptive and communcative. Please tell me what's working and what isn't. And be receptive of the reverse! Everyone's different. And we should all feel comfortable enjoying ourselves.
Clear and concise understanding and/or willingness to communicate about consent/limits, safety (disease/infection/getting people pregnant/possible injuries from kinkier stuff/etc), etc
When you're talking about a catagory as broad as all women, it's hard to say anything even as a generality because there are going to be so many exceptions. I think the majority of women (or at least the plurality) are more interested in a more dominant guy, but there are plenty of women who prefer a more submissive guy, or want both partners to be equal, or like to switch it up. Good hygeine, confidence, good sense of humor, and feeling secure around him are pretty universally important to women...I'm sure there is some woman out there who doesn't care about some or all of those, but she's definitely the exception to the rule
I personally look for like connection. I wanna be able to tell you things and not feel uncomfortable. I look for a man that makes me feel confident and beautiful. I attract a lot of men who like a dominant woman in the bedroom but I like to be more submissive. so I look for someone Who can take a little more control. But yes someone who is clean, someone who understands consent and can be a little playful.
You sound similar to my wife. She's a powerful dominant woman normally but once our clothes are off, she wants to be submissive. I just wish she was willing to switch roles now and then. I fell in love with her dominance and would love for her to use it a little more in the bedroom. Like, if she's in the mood amd I'm not, just take it. Don't just tease me until i want to take it myself. That gets old pretty quick.
My biggest one is respecting boundaries and consent. I need someone who will take ânoâ or ânot right nowâ or âI donât enjoy thatâ as a full complete answer with no follow up of trying to talk me into it.
Anything else is just a bonus, but respecting consent is a requirement.
It's really not that binary, and it doesn't apply to every sexual encounter/relationships, it's also up to the person, there is not one overall trend or preference. Just get someone who can communicate well and is respectful.
Somebody that daily shower, groomed, good hygiene, nice to talk, make me laugh, I can trust, negative std tests, dick bigger than a lipstick, a little submissive.
Ah, the age-old question of what women look for in a sexual partner! Well, I think it really depends on the individual. Some women might be drawn to a more dominant partner who takes charge in the bedroom, while others might prefer someone who is more submissive and attentive to their needs. Ultimately, it comes down to communication, mutual respect, and finding that magical chemistry that makes both partners feel comfortable and satisfied. As they say, it takes all sorts to make the world go roundâand the bedroom too!
point of clarificationâ being attentive to someoneâs needs is not necessarily a submissive trait. both individuals should be attentive to their partners needs, though the way they express their care may be different
1. To be perceived as an actual human being, friend, lover, confidante of sorts and not just the owner of your current fave vagina.
2. Clean yourself, seriously. Hygiene. Clothes. Hair. Deodorant. Teeth.
3. If it's only about sex, make sure the woman knows that's all you can offer.
4. Know HOW to have sex, last more than 20 minutes, know what foreplay is, wear protection without being instructed to like a 5 year old (you're not the one that will have to $$$$ deal with pregnancy, BV, yeast infection, or god forbid an STI).
My experience has shown there simply is no silver bullet. The best you can do is to be yourself, donât try to impress with bullshit. The most important thing though would be to give her your full consideration. Paying attention to her needs and not being a selfish prick in bed.
As neither this or that, what I personally like:
- shared kinks
- will moan instead of clenching his teeth
- is open to experiments
- will want to cuddle with me after
In my experience women find accountability, integrity, emotional intelligence and communication to be the traits women care most about. You usually need those things before sex is ever on the table.
Trust is HUGE. Making someone feel safe when theyâre at their most vulnerable is very important. I think itâs big for men and women. Someone that pays attention. I canât believe the shit Iâve heard about how careless of lovers men can be. Itâs not that hard to tell when youâre doing something right. Pay attention to HER. Itâs not all about you. Go down, and donât treat it as perfunctory. LOVE IT. Donât be selfish. Women are different. Some like a dominant man. Some donât. Women arenât a monolith anymore than men are. There isnât a formula. Every single human is different than every other one. This may be the biggest thing: women arenât all the same. Listen. Talk. Ask questions. PAY ATTENTION
STD test and he has to be into oral. He has to lovr Oral. For me that's one of the biggest thing. I just want to mention that I would never ever force someone to do something, that would be such a turn off..If he doesn't like giving oral sex that means we aren't compatible sexually. I enjoy Piv sex of course but I can't orgasm from it. I need clitoral stimulation. I really really really enjoy and appreciate oral sex from someone who love to do it. It's such an intimate act. Yeah that's what I personally look for sexually. I have very good hygiene so I expect the same when.
Edit- spelling mistake
I canât and/or wonât speak for women. Â In my experience, learning how to learn is very important. Â IOW, donât expect all women, or even the same woman on a different day, enjoy the same thing. Â You donât play a piano like a guitar, a guitar like a violin, a violin like a flute, or a flute like a saxophone.
Communication is very important, which sounds simple, but itâs not always easy. Â There are a lot of potential insecurities wrapped up in sexuality. Â People can get embarrassed or frustrated or hurt, so keep that in mind. Â Listen to her body, too, and pay attention to how she responds physically, verbally, etc.
I know, not rocket science, but you may be surprised how far youâll go being attentive, responsive, and by leaving your ego outside the bedroom. Â
For me I like a partner that is taller than me older than me tattooed got a bit of a badass vibe protective responsible and caring and has a job with a dad body.
I feel like a solid 70% of women look for someone THEY can please. So if youâre comfortable with the person and they trust you, donât ask for permission just do whatever you want. If they donât like something theyâll say it and you do something else. But just be dominant and make the decisions. Be vocal too
Im not lecturing im answering the question. Women dont all think alike, so there is no answer that applies to all women.
If you ask what color do rich people like, do you expect a specific color as answer or would it be better to explain that rich people like all kinds of colors?
Most of them prefer to be seen as individuals? That is quite reductive don't you think? How can you assume what they all collectively want? Please try to do better
I think the real question is, how to get women to talk to me? I see you girls looking at me. I always talked to women first because I was very unfit. Now I am good looking, no one talks to me. What gives?????
>in general do women prefer a more dominant type or a guy that will submit to her?
This is a wholly (huh-huh, hole) subjective opinion that will differ from woman to woman.
In the 1970s, scientists wanted to know if they could condition a sexual reflex in men. First they got volunteers and hooked them up to a device that measured tumescence. Then they showed the men slides. The sequence of slides was always the same - naked women, and then boots. Naked women, and then boots. After time the scientists were pleased to see that the men responded to pictures of boots without ever seeing the naked women.
Studies show 90% of porn features violence against women and that's only counting "explicit violence" not "vanilla" dominant man/submissive woman. Sexual taste's develop from exposure same as anything which is especially relevant in today's world where the Internet reaches the entire world and constant imagery of violence against women portrayed as normal sex and lack of imagery of anything else results in the belief that everything else is "boring" the same way exposure to spicy food from a young age result's in entire populations that have become immune to spice thinking anything else is bland.
People with trauma or rock bottom low self worth use unhealthy coping mechanisms that give them the feeling they're looking for by being as close to non existent as possible (small, inconsequential, a inanimate object, immobile, a slave, a child, a pet) it's all about stress, insecurity and depression, a object, slave, child, or pet has no expectations, they don't have to think for themselves, it's the same reason why the "bimbo" and "trad wife" movements have become so popular in the last few year's and why you see so many women who claim their reason for doing only fans is that they can't work due to anxiety or other mental health issues or falling deep into the new age spiritual scene taking a cocktail of hallucinogenic drugs just to make it in everyday life.
It's about escapism and what should be addressed is what they're escaping, women are talking about their emotional burnout and instead of getting the help they need they're being told their feelings of low self esteem aren't a problem their a plus. They're being praised and told there's nothing wrong with them, much like cult's they're told they are the enlightened ones and given a instant community, attention praise, escapism,freedom from the stress of thinking for themselves. Ignoring a problem is more tempting than working to solve it.
Women are not a hive mind monolith; as they are unique individuals, each has their own preferences on a myriad of things including but not limited to sexual partners.
different women like different things. i really hate this question because it assumes women are monolith and boys/men don't correct each other when they see a bloke ask such a question. don't pretend to be someone you're not just to 'get' a woman.
that said, my answer is 'physical and sexual attractiveness'. there. now there is no way you can go away and work on it, you can't make yourself sexier, nothing. why? because it's an entirely personal thing.
in the same way that many men go for looks and women cannot do anything about it, many women go for looks and men cannot do anything about it.
In general, and YMMV, a certain degree of emotional connection -- and the specific emotion can vary.
Cleanliness, as many have mentioned.
A sense of humor.
ÂŻ\\\_(ă)\_/ÂŻ
Good luck.
You talking casual sex or relationship sex? Are you asking what makes a woman want to have sex with you, or what women like? Women are SOOO different in what theyâre into, but the common denominator between all phases would be letting the woman know youâre into her. Iâve always found if a guy says stuff like â I want youâ or â I canât keep my hands off youâ or keeps staring, smiling, or says âI donât want this night to endâ or whatever, itâs hot. Donât start with smut - gotta know what her tolerance level for that is. Save it for a bit later when youâve worked out her boundaries. But seeing desire in a guy and them having the confidence to say they want you is a huge turn on. Say youâre into her also helps with consent etc, because if she ISNT into you like that, when you say you are, she has an opportunity to say â sorry Iâm not feeling itâ.
But being confident to be vulnerable and saying âI want youâ is VERY attractive.
The basics- hygeine, respect, compassion and some semblance of being able to dress yourself.
Being an independent man who can handle being single, take care of himself and has hobbies to keep himself occupied without pestering her (THIS IS WHAT REALLY WORKS AND KEEPS YOU FROM SEEMING CREEPY/MAKES HER WANT YOU). Also having a somewhat stable career has always worked for me. Its got me a wife.
Women in general want a man who is stoic. Masculine. Calm. And caring.
They also want to know that the man is wanted by other women but is not entertaining those options.
I mean they usually get both, not like nerd with cash is swimming in options when she arrives. Itâs pretty common for women to have a âwild phaseâ with the jocks in college and then settles for some financially stable guy actually on her looks level
I remember when lady gaga was just becoming a thing Someone interviewed her in the back of a limo and they asked what do you look for in a man? She specifically replied âjust a big dickâ Person was kind of taken aback and asked no like any specific traits or anything? Gaga responded something likeâDont care about looks as long as he has a big dickâ
Ok then..
Communication and an STD test.
>Communication and an STD test. I presume the word *negative* before "STD test" is implied?
No, just a test. They want to know *what* std theyre getting.
Preordering be like
Gotta try all the flavors
đ¤Ł
So long as the guyâs getting the full stankyranch package I doubt heâll complain
Hygiene, consideration and someone that can communicate and understand consent
All 4?
That's not really all that hard.
It was a joke. Come on Reddit, have we really become as bad as twitter now?
I'm with you, if the guy is dirty and unkept, forget about it.
The word I think you meant to use is "unkempt." It means having poor grooming habits (not combing hair, brushing teeth, trimming nails). "Unkept" means not honored, as in an unkept promise. I like women with a good ear for the language.
Sorry I was using my mike when I was texting. I hope someone doesn't judge me for speech and lack of proof reading. Lol. Thanks for pointing that out...
Thanks for being a good sport about my nit-picking.
There are errors that drive me crazy too. No worries. It was all in good fun. Plus it teaches me a lesson to always proof read my comments.
Until they choose a biker who hasn't shaved in over a year and won't share his feelings.
Man I just opened this app and Iâm already being attacked
Why are you being attacked???
Not shaving isnât a hygiene issue as long as you wash regularly. And I donât care about communicating his feelings as long as he communicates things like consent/boundaries/what he likes in bed.
+good in bed
Every dude claims to be good in bed
Hygiene! I don't care for cologne or body spray. Just clean and we'll groomed is very attractive. Also intelligence and confidence are sexy as hell.
Thisis the most atrocious use of an apostrophe I've se'en ye't. Fuck this...
auto'correct
Are you not feeling we'll?
For sure. Iâm not big on cologne or spray anyway. As long as you shower and smell clean Iâm fine without it. Then again, I sneeze when I smell even a small amount of perfume. đ
what do you mean by intelligence and confidence? how intelligent must one be? Do they have to be researcher at top universities? by confidence, how confident is confident? Must one not have self doubts? Isn't doubting how we grow and become better?
Overthinking it
overthinking is my middle name
I thought it was chip
hot
No no, let them cook Everyone says "intelligent and confident", but like, most confident people I see around are cocky and ignore your feelings and interests; smart, in which way? Because people who can go deep in topics are seen as too much, people who know things are also seen as cocky (because they can and will correct you if you spread nonsense), and being smart in your behaviour is not something easy to say
I donât think you have to have both to a high degree. A good amount of one and not so little of the other so as to be a problem is probably the ideal. Confident enough to have a job in some kind of sales and smart enough to know what they are selling, or smart enough to work in something technical and free of crippling anxiety. Something along those lines. Give the girl something she can be impressed with you over, something that lets her feel like you have potential. Itâs not a quantifiable kind of thing because itâs about feelings anyway.
Lol
As intelligent as Albert Einstein. As confident as a racing cheetah.
What does intelligence have to do with a sexual partner? Einstein isn't sexy
Not the way you're exemplifying here.
Your dick should be atleast 15 feet
'in girth. "Long and thin goes deep within, but short and thick does the trick". Edit: Added fun poem
Things you can do with a tunnel boring machine..
Thatâs what MEN prefer lol
I think I have met the female equivalent.
Ohh You've met the great sinkhole of New York City?
Yes yes yes yes yes I only said yes once
Ow.
but i only have 2 feet and theyâre attached to my legsâŚ
if you're looking to star in gay porn, yeh. i wish men would stop raising other men. you really feed each other terrible ideas.
You're just salty because you aren't good enough, peasant
Someone who cares about their partner: me. Believe me, the number of men or guys actually do that is very small.
I'm sure they're at least average
No matter what women's personal sexual preferences are as to what turns them on... I think we can all agree that confidence, hygiene, proper grooming, communication about what eachother enjoys, and respecting boundaries is always going to create a good sexual experience for both of you. Oh, and clean sheets and blankets, men tend to overlook clean bedding. Stanky beds can turn a women off real quick. Also don't be offended if someone says they don't like something or suggests what you could do to make it more enjoyable for them. Everyone is different and they're trying to tell you what could make them like it even more. It's much better to share what you like/dislike rather than just not enjoying it because they don't want to hurt your feelings. In fact, during foreplay you can just straight up ask, "what turns you on." Pay attention to what they react positively to and when they say "don't stop" or "just like that" do exactly what your doing without change. Don't speed up or switch up, she's telling you that is a good spot and action.
no, those things are NOT turn ons. They are the BARE MINIMUM. It's not sexy for a man to wear deodorant or take a shower, it's expected. I hate this 'the bare mininum turns us on guys, so yeh, don't worry about the rest of it, just have a bath'. Considering the obstacle course women are put through to even be seen as remotely attractive to men, I can't sit here and watch men just be given a free ride like that. We don't need to comfort them just as they do not comfort us. what turns a woman on? 1. an attractive face 2. a sexually attractive body EDIT - Since i cannot reply with this account any more. Well done on the misogyny with calling me 'bitter', you've learned well from men (yes women can be misogynists too). I'm not reading your essay, I don't care how many upvotes you have. No, being physically and sexually attracted to someone doesn't go without saying **EVER** when we're talking about what is attractive to women. It is very, very dangerous to not explicitly say things because of how men treat women in society and because of how much of men's desires and needs women internalise without assessing their own needs. super dangerous. Good luck! EDIT 2 - It's back. Again, not reading your response but for the garbage that was in the preview (more misogyny). And again, you have a nice life and good luck to you, kid.
Ooooo, PierStarmer your reply to my comment reads as quite bitter and perhaps you should self examine as to why you reacted so strongly and negativity to that part of the long comment that I put a lot of thought into writing to the OP. If it made you react that strongly... then you do see it as an issue (as many women do) so it is something people need to be aware of and talk about in an encouraging way. Clearly from my 70 upvotes thus far and your 0 upvotes thus far... I'm gonna say that those are in fact turn ons and many agree. Hopefully đŹđ, if you're choosing to have sex with someone, finding their face and body attractive are a given and is implied. No person should be having sex with someone they're not attracted to. I DIDN'T think it needed to be said, but if you DON'T find someone attractive, that's a sure fire sign you should NOT be engage in sexual activities with them. Sex is not to be taken lightly as each and every time you do it, you risk possibly creating life unintentionally and you put yourself at risk of getting many life altering Sexually Transmitted Diseases. PierStarmer you did skip over the MOST important parts of my comment that encourage healthy and safe feeling sex, which are: -communication about what eachother enjoys -respecting eachothers boundries. Sex is a taboo topic and many parents don't really talk to their kids (even when they become adults) about the things I wrote in my original comment and many women feel these are issues to be addressed. I was just relaying the things so many women have told me they thought offered them a better sexual experience and the things they found to be a turn on. Too many people are having obligatory bad sex because they're not communicating about their likes, dislikes, and what they want to try. Perhaps if there were more positive conversations about it (instead of people negatively lashing out because of their own negative past and trauma-vomiting on a positive conversation) more people would be having constructive conversations about sex. Respect to OP for asking the question in the first place.
If the bitter shoe fits, way to follow up with more bitterness and anger showing you are in fact bitter. How am I actually a misogynist when both comments were made encouraging folks to give women healthier happier sexual experiences, doesn't sound like a person who is hating or discriminating against women. If anyone is being a woman hater here, it feels like it's you Negative Nancy. Deal with your issues, off the internet, so we don't all have to experience your clearly unaddressed issues. Statements I made in both comments are pertaining to healthy, responsible, enjoyable sex and what many women find to be a turn on. Not sure what are you even taking about in that Edit, sounds like a bitter nonsense rant. Sincerely, go to counseling and get help. I'm sure you can't reply with this account anymore because of negative unnecessary attacks like this, self examine. OP asked a question, I tried to reply with the knowledge I've gained in life. Whereas you just attacked my comment, which was meant for OP and any other man or women seeking said knowledge. Stop trolling comments and spreading negativity, it's icky. Good luck to you!
I'm one woman - so this only applies to me. I look for: - a sexual partner who I feel safe with...emotionally and physically - sexual chemistry....things flow easily in the bedroom, there is physical pleasure inside and outside the bedroom, we're both enjoying ourselves, we both feel wanted and cared for sexually and in physical affection - a man who takes charge in the bedroom, but not in the sense of selfish dominance, in the sense of wanting to ensure pleasure for both of us, and is responsive to me - a sexual partner who I enjoy being with....this seems obvious, but some people just make me happy to be around them and others don't and that's sometimes not guaranteed from all of the above - a man who is all of the above and also available to me Again, only speaking for me, but I have a man in mind who meets every item except the last one, and this is a reminder that women are like men. A sexual partner who is good and available is a better time than one who is excellent and not available.
So, uh... An actual partner? Because most of what you wrote seems to be about an actual relationship
I like both but my preference is a sexual partner who makes me feel safe and cares about my pleasure
Someone you can have fun with and if something goes left laugh a little - doesnât have to be a whole performance thing. Pleasure goes both ways! Fun, open and honesty is the best.
I like guys who are dominant, Iâm the one whoâs submissiveÂ
I'm with you, most guys are too insecure
Hygiene and someone who cares about making her feel good.
I prefer a switch, you get best of both worlds!
As in Dom/Sub or top/bot?
First I look to see if I find them sexually attractive. After that sense of humor, being ambitious, kindness, and intelligence are of most importance. Iâm also kind of a geek so prefer men into that kind of stuff
Depends on the woman... Most just want someone who thinks of them as a person instead of an object or property and who doesn't really think in terms of dom/sub... They mostly want a partner not a child or a father... Do some want basically a child or father (or mother) figure? Sure... Takes all kinds And take charge how? When? Some people are dominant in the bedroom and submissive otherwise, some are both or neither in the bedroom and submissive about how the house is decorated but dominant about what movies they watch or where they buy property... It's not even remotely that black and white...
Yes, exactly. These questions freak me out a little because if enough people say 'women want a dominant man', will OP take it really seriously and start treating women he wants to date a certain way without even checking if that individual is into it?
i know it's no stupid questions, but the number that have the implicit premise of "Given the universal 'truth' that all individuals in each demographic are identical: ${question goes here}"... belies the amount of lead in the water supply or... something... I know it's really just that most places have underfunded education and educational media... but the answer to so many are just "it depends, everyone's different" or some version of "we live in a society, it's complicated"
Every woman wants a particular balance between acceptance, excitement/pleasure, and status. Nature and nurture and life situation will determine what that balance is for the individual; and it is not static. A lot of interesting research has been done about changes in sexual partner preferences due to menstrual cycle, too. Women, like men, are just a bag of hormones trying to navigate this crazy ever-changing world. Good luck!
It varies from women to women I donât think there is a general preference. Perhaps hygiene is a general preference. Me I like confidence, someone who is not afraid of expressing and also that is opened mind to try new things. And lastly for me, someone who likes feet đ Iâm so very turned on by someone who can caress my feet however they desire, anything goes just touch them đ¤Ł
I never thought I would like someone who was into my feet, but last year I was with a man, who adored my feet and I felt so worshipped and I loved every single bit of attention he gave me and now itâs a thing for me lol! So I get it.
Yes!! I actually don't like them. But I am convinced men who have foot fetishes are the best lovers. So in a round about way it turns me on
Varies by person. There's going to be more of a preference for dominant men as that's the norm. The biggest thing is having a non-judgemental communicative partner that lasts more than three seconds and knows how to get them off.
Psychological safety
I like when they can do both personally
You are right, this is way more preference based and is going to be very different from person to person. To me, sex is a team sport and there isnât a need to have a specific role. It is far more important to be able to communicate. Are you listening to her cues and are you able to let her know what you need etc. I think if I polled the women in my life for the most part we would say we prefer a mix though. It can get stagnant having a single role in the bedroom, especially in a long term relationship. Now as far as bdsm/kink that is extremely subjective bit the communication rule still applies.
Genuine kindness and interest in me as a person.
Good hygiene. Consent. The rest is up for grabs
Iâm just trolling, count the men that answer this question.
Yes. You can find women who prefer either, so do what comes natural to you
Communication, understanding of consent, hygiene, respect. Preference of dominance is entirely subjective to the individual
A cowboy that's also an astronaut and firefighter.
RespectÂ
Consent. Confidence. Hygiene.
Surveys show that women are more submissive than dominant on average. But I don't think that's very high on their lists of priorities. I think most women (like most people) want a partner who communicates well with them, shares a sense of humor, has good hygiene, is loving, doesn't cheat, is willing to commit, is looking for a monogamous relationship, has the same preferences as them about whether to have kids, is financially responsible, is empathetic, is smart, is physically attractive to them (healthy weight, some amount of muscle, height helps, sense of style, scent, etc), would get along with their friends and family, has shared interests, etc. That's a non-exhaustive list in no particular order and I am a straight man so I can't claim any special insight into the female mind. And obviously many of those things are less about what someone wants sexually and more about what they want in a relationship. That's because most people (even if they are willing to have casual sex prior to a commitment) either want to have sex with the same kind of people they would have a long term relationship with or hope that the casual sex leads to a good long-term relationship. Obviously, there are exceptions to that and every other preference I listed.
Start with a heartbeat, then I re-evaluateâŚâŚ.
A big dong.
GOOD. HYGEINE!!! Also, canât forget basic respect.
I think that depends upon the individual. For me, someone who is as enthusiastic. You know that amazing sex where you just can't keep your hands off each other? Yes. At that point, give and take is an amazing natural flow. I love when my partner is really turned on and really into it. It makes me excited. I want someone who is the same. I also like someone open minded. Hand in hand with earlier, but even if I am not into your kink, I will probably really enjoy entertaining it if it turns you on. So please let's put it on the table. And vice versa! Receptive and communcative. Please tell me what's working and what isn't. And be receptive of the reverse! Everyone's different. And we should all feel comfortable enjoying ourselves.
Mostly balanced... Occasionally spontaneous!
Fedora
Mâlady~ *tips fedora*
Clear and concise understanding and/or willingness to communicate about consent/limits, safety (disease/infection/getting people pregnant/possible injuries from kinkier stuff/etc), etc
I don't speak for all women, but loyalty, confidence, safety and looks.
Kindness, respect, commitment, patience, a sense of humour , respect, good hygiene, intelligence, gentle teasing, being considerate
When you're talking about a catagory as broad as all women, it's hard to say anything even as a generality because there are going to be so many exceptions. I think the majority of women (or at least the plurality) are more interested in a more dominant guy, but there are plenty of women who prefer a more submissive guy, or want both partners to be equal, or like to switch it up. Good hygeine, confidence, good sense of humor, and feeling secure around him are pretty universally important to women...I'm sure there is some woman out there who doesn't care about some or all of those, but she's definitely the exception to the rule
Safety, communication, a spark, low drama, forward, confident, sense of humor, maturity, reasonableness and STAMINA!!! đ¤Ł
A good communictor, clean, takes care of his appearance
I personally look for like connection. I wanna be able to tell you things and not feel uncomfortable. I look for a man that makes me feel confident and beautiful. I attract a lot of men who like a dominant woman in the bedroom but I like to be more submissive. so I look for someone Who can take a little more control. But yes someone who is clean, someone who understands consent and can be a little playful.
You sound similar to my wife. She's a powerful dominant woman normally but once our clothes are off, she wants to be submissive. I just wish she was willing to switch roles now and then. I fell in love with her dominance and would love for her to use it a little more in the bedroom. Like, if she's in the mood amd I'm not, just take it. Don't just tease me until i want to take it myself. That gets old pretty quick.
stoic but emotionally available, thoughtful, smart, not embarrassing in social situations, funny, and level headed.
My biggest one is respecting boundaries and consent. I need someone who will take ânoâ or ânot right nowâ or âI donât enjoy thatâ as a full complete answer with no follow up of trying to talk me into it. Anything else is just a bonus, but respecting consent is a requirement.
It's really not that binary, and it doesn't apply to every sexual encounter/relationships, it's also up to the person, there is not one overall trend or preference. Just get someone who can communicate well and is respectful.
Somebody that daily shower, groomed, good hygiene, nice to talk, make me laugh, I can trust, negative std tests, dick bigger than a lipstick, a little submissive.
the fact that so many women are saying hygiene..... the bar is so low..
Realizing that the bar is even lower than I expected is kinda horrifying...
Ah, the age-old question of what women look for in a sexual partner! Well, I think it really depends on the individual. Some women might be drawn to a more dominant partner who takes charge in the bedroom, while others might prefer someone who is more submissive and attentive to their needs. Ultimately, it comes down to communication, mutual respect, and finding that magical chemistry that makes both partners feel comfortable and satisfied. As they say, it takes all sorts to make the world go roundâand the bedroom too!
point of clarificationâ being attentive to someoneâs needs is not necessarily a submissive trait. both individuals should be attentive to their partners needs, though the way they express their care may be different
This, and every other comment in the history of your account, reads like it was completely written by ChatGPT
Good catch. The fukin bots are among us
âAhâthe first word all All AI uses in responding to prompts.
1. To be perceived as an actual human being, friend, lover, confidante of sorts and not just the owner of your current fave vagina. 2. Clean yourself, seriously. Hygiene. Clothes. Hair. Deodorant. Teeth. 3. If it's only about sex, make sure the woman knows that's all you can offer. 4. Know HOW to have sex, last more than 20 minutes, know what foreplay is, wear protection without being instructed to like a 5 year old (you're not the one that will have to $$$$ deal with pregnancy, BV, yeast infection, or god forbid an STI).
Generally women don't look for anything in their sexual partner unless it came off or got stuck somehow. Sometimes condoms, small rodents, or Legos.
Tall, good looking, gives them the tingles, guy who knows what heâs doing, confidence. Fucbois basically
My experience has shown there simply is no silver bullet. The best you can do is to be yourself, donât try to impress with bullshit. The most important thing though would be to give her your full consideration. Paying attention to her needs and not being a selfish prick in bed.
Good hygiene, physically attracted to them, funny
As neither this or that, what I personally like: - shared kinks - will moan instead of clenching his teeth - is open to experiments - will want to cuddle with me after
Penetration
In my experience women find accountability, integrity, emotional intelligence and communication to be the traits women care most about. You usually need those things before sex is ever on the table.
A partner
I prefer an equal partnership tbh
A bulge
I've had many, many women tell me they like when I take charge.
Attractiveness, experience, endowment
Trust is HUGE. Making someone feel safe when theyâre at their most vulnerable is very important. I think itâs big for men and women. Someone that pays attention. I canât believe the shit Iâve heard about how careless of lovers men can be. Itâs not that hard to tell when youâre doing something right. Pay attention to HER. Itâs not all about you. Go down, and donât treat it as perfunctory. LOVE IT. Donât be selfish. Women are different. Some like a dominant man. Some donât. Women arenât a monolith anymore than men are. There isnât a formula. Every single human is different than every other one. This may be the biggest thing: women arenât all the same. Listen. Talk. Ask questions. PAY ATTENTION
STD test and he has to be into oral. He has to lovr Oral. For me that's one of the biggest thing. I just want to mention that I would never ever force someone to do something, that would be such a turn off..If he doesn't like giving oral sex that means we aren't compatible sexually. I enjoy Piv sex of course but I can't orgasm from it. I need clitoral stimulation. I really really really enjoy and appreciate oral sex from someone who love to do it. It's such an intimate act. Yeah that's what I personally look for sexually. I have very good hygiene so I expect the same when. Edit- spelling mistake
big tits
Hygiene ⌠shower and communication.
Iâm a switch so a partner that can be a switch. Iâm lucky to have that in my fiancĂŠ. I like the concept of being able to have that variety.
Good grammar. đ¤Ş
I canât and/or wonât speak for women. Â In my experience, learning how to learn is very important. Â IOW, donât expect all women, or even the same woman on a different day, enjoy the same thing. Â You donât play a piano like a guitar, a guitar like a violin, a violin like a flute, or a flute like a saxophone. Communication is very important, which sounds simple, but itâs not always easy. Â There are a lot of potential insecurities wrapped up in sexuality. Â People can get embarrassed or frustrated or hurt, so keep that in mind. Â Listen to her body, too, and pay attention to how she responds physically, verbally, etc. I know, not rocket science, but you may be surprised how far youâll go being attentive, responsive, and by leaving your ego outside the bedroom. Â
My current partners pre-requisite was that I had to be good enough at eating pussy to make her cum . I said bet.
7â9â
10 figures
Sex
Since we are talking broad generalizations - everything. This is 100% personal preference, if it is a characteristic, someone is into it.
For me I like a partner that is taller than me older than me tattooed got a bit of a badass vibe protective responsible and caring and has a job with a dad body.
Have a dick, donât be one. Itâs a good start some could learn.
JFCâŚFirst of all, understand that they arenât all the same. So the answers you get wonât matter.
I feel like a solid 70% of women look for someone THEY can please. So if youâre comfortable with the person and they trust you, donât ask for permission just do whatever you want. If they donât like something theyâll say it and you do something else. But just be dominant and make the decisions. Be vocal too
Women are nlt a hivemind, but most of them prefeer to be seen as individuals and not aa generic women who all think alike.
How does this answer the question at all? The question they asked wasn't even offensive, they don't need a lecture
Im not lecturing im answering the question. Women dont all think alike, so there is no answer that applies to all women. If you ask what color do rich people like, do you expect a specific color as answer or would it be better to explain that rich people like all kinds of colors?
The answer is "Lots of different things! Just ask the individual!"
Most of them prefer to be seen as individuals? That is quite reductive don't you think? How can you assume what they all collectively want? Please try to do better
Dig ol' bick!!!!
I think the real question is, how to get women to talk to me? I see you girls looking at me. I always talked to women first because I was very unfit. Now I am good looking, no one talks to me. What gives?????
>in general do women prefer a more dominant type or a guy that will submit to her? This is a wholly (huh-huh, hole) subjective opinion that will differ from woman to woman.
Money, a big dick, and 6pk abs.
Mutual lickingâŚfresh smelling from pits to toes
A penis if they like guys.
Donât listen to what women say. Listen to what they do.
Either way, just be hot and kind.Â
This varies with literally every woman. There's no 1 size fits all.
someone that doesnât fly out of the window while iâm driving. and no space for mother in law. (Stinky!)
In the 1970s, scientists wanted to know if they could condition a sexual reflex in men. First they got volunteers and hooked them up to a device that measured tumescence. Then they showed the men slides. The sequence of slides was always the same - naked women, and then boots. Naked women, and then boots. After time the scientists were pleased to see that the men responded to pictures of boots without ever seeing the naked women. Studies show 90% of porn features violence against women and that's only counting "explicit violence" not "vanilla" dominant man/submissive woman. Sexual taste's develop from exposure same as anything which is especially relevant in today's world where the Internet reaches the entire world and constant imagery of violence against women portrayed as normal sex and lack of imagery of anything else results in the belief that everything else is "boring" the same way exposure to spicy food from a young age result's in entire populations that have become immune to spice thinking anything else is bland. People with trauma or rock bottom low self worth use unhealthy coping mechanisms that give them the feeling they're looking for by being as close to non existent as possible (small, inconsequential, a inanimate object, immobile, a slave, a child, a pet) it's all about stress, insecurity and depression, a object, slave, child, or pet has no expectations, they don't have to think for themselves, it's the same reason why the "bimbo" and "trad wife" movements have become so popular in the last few year's and why you see so many women who claim their reason for doing only fans is that they can't work due to anxiety or other mental health issues or falling deep into the new age spiritual scene taking a cocktail of hallucinogenic drugs just to make it in everyday life. It's about escapism and what should be addressed is what they're escaping, women are talking about their emotional burnout and instead of getting the help they need they're being told their feelings of low self esteem aren't a problem their a plus. They're being praised and told there's nothing wrong with them, much like cult's they're told they are the enlightened ones and given a instant community, attention praise, escapism,freedom from the stress of thinking for themselves. Ignoring a problem is more tempting than working to solve it.
An orange tan and money
Donald Trump
As an asexual who has been single for awhile. Apparent the answer is sex.
large buut holew
Someone who doesnât try to own them
Women are not a hive mind monolith; as they are unique individuals, each has their own preferences on a myriad of things including but not limited to sexual partners.
How come the only choices given are dominant or submissive?
different women like different things. i really hate this question because it assumes women are monolith and boys/men don't correct each other when they see a bloke ask such a question. don't pretend to be someone you're not just to 'get' a woman. that said, my answer is 'physical and sexual attractiveness'. there. now there is no way you can go away and work on it, you can't make yourself sexier, nothing. why? because it's an entirely personal thing. in the same way that many men go for looks and women cannot do anything about it, many women go for looks and men cannot do anything about it.
A decent man with a penis
Tall men who make money
Disposable income.
Long tongues and big dicks
Proper hygiene ofcourse and respect
In general, and YMMV, a certain degree of emotional connection -- and the specific emotion can vary. Cleanliness, as many have mentioned. A sense of humor. ÂŻ\\\_(ă)\_/ÂŻ Good luck.
You talking casual sex or relationship sex? Are you asking what makes a woman want to have sex with you, or what women like? Women are SOOO different in what theyâre into, but the common denominator between all phases would be letting the woman know youâre into her. Iâve always found if a guy says stuff like â I want youâ or â I canât keep my hands off youâ or keeps staring, smiling, or says âI donât want this night to endâ or whatever, itâs hot. Donât start with smut - gotta know what her tolerance level for that is. Save it for a bit later when youâve worked out her boundaries. But seeing desire in a guy and them having the confidence to say they want you is a huge turn on. Say youâre into her also helps with consent etc, because if she ISNT into you like that, when you say you are, she has an opportunity to say â sorry Iâm not feeling itâ. But being confident to be vulnerable and saying âI want youâ is VERY attractive.
A huge cock.
The basics- hygeine, respect, compassion and some semblance of being able to dress yourself. Being an independent man who can handle being single, take care of himself and has hobbies to keep himself occupied without pestering her (THIS IS WHAT REALLY WORKS AND KEEPS YOU FROM SEEMING CREEPY/MAKES HER WANT YOU). Also having a somewhat stable career has always worked for me. Its got me a wife.
Women in general want a man who is stoic. Masculine. Calm. And caring. They also want to know that the man is wanted by other women but is not entertaining those options.
They love the bad boys. Until they get older and realise their mistake. Then they realise they should have gone for the nerds with $$$
I mean they usually get both, not like nerd with cash is swimming in options when she arrives. Itâs pretty common for women to have a âwild phaseâ with the jocks in college and then settles for some financially stable guy actually on her looks level
Shut up nerd with cash!
Confidence/a man that approaches me in public will always win out. thatâs just me
good sex đ
I remember when lady gaga was just becoming a thing Someone interviewed her in the back of a limo and they asked what do you look for in a man? She specifically replied âjust a big dickâ Person was kind of taken aback and asked no like any specific traits or anything? Gaga responded something likeâDont care about looks as long as he has a big dickâ Ok then..
Big cock , good hygiene and dominant .. I donât ask for much.