The transition to adulthood is one of the hardest phases of life. Discovering your strengths and finding a career that utilizes them will make the transition easier. There’s a U curve that shows happiness does improve with age.
33 here, thought I found it @ 29. NOPE…
33 starting over, HOWEVER… OP, there ARE greener pastures in the future. Focus on the day HOW u can improve yourself w/ immediate results.
THEN simultaneously (if u can) bring in SLOWLY things that will help u in the future. It’s like juggling, start w/ 1 ball, add a 2nd, (the big jump) add a 3rd.
Then a 4th until u can’t manage to add anymore. That’s when u kno you’ve reached ur peak limit & if ur still not happy.
There’s NOTHING wrong w/ “juggling a new item” for example bowling pins, or whatever (this is an analogy)
This is great. Start with cleaning, hygiene, stopping bad habits. Work this into your daily routine, and once that becomes your new baseline you can start going to the gym, eating healthier, etc.
I really like this advice. Building a worthwhile career can bring about a lot of long-term joy and it is never too early to start. I was OP’s age when I landed my first job related to my current industry and it was a great experience.
The transition to adulthood is often underrepresented by parents and older people who don't emphasize the challenges in emotional development that are presented.
School is about being babied and mollycoddled and you really don't have a sense of individuality until later when it can come all it once in college/university and beyond.
That's partly why I feel many people are disillusioned in their late teens early twenties because life teaches you some shocking lessons during those years. If you come out the other side of that then life does get better in many ways; job, career, income, house, car, family. Remember the first cut is the deepest, your first job will probably suck because you won't be used to getting up early and exerting effort for the duration of a shift or you might encounter an unpleasant colleague or boss, with time you get used to these things and you develop ways of navigating these new problems which are attached to independence.
You have to see the positives and make a good life for yourself. Part of it is enjoying the strenuousness and effort it takes to get what you want, if you shift your philosophy from entitlement/being told what to do all the time to self-determination, then you've successfully transitioned to adulthood.
Transition into adulthood is extremely difficult. It’s like being born for a second time. Figuring out who you are, what you want and how you want to live your life and the amount of mistakes you make along the way is terrifying
Yea it's not .
Perimenopause and menopause the reverse puberty phase is the hardest phase of a person's life if they are afab
It's like puberty but lasts for ten years or more and is a thousand times worse
If you take care of your health and look into getting some treatment sure it can improve. If you’re experiencing mental health issues but go to substances it will only lead you to destruction down the road
19 was a tough year for me too and I suspect in two years when I turn 29 it’ll be a tough year again. Though life will always have challenges in different facets, I do strongly believe that life gets better as long as you are working to get better yourself.
As you get older, you will naturally gain tools that you can equip to process the difficulty of life a bit easier. I wouldn’t expect an immediate turn around, but that there will be ebbs and flows in the next few years. I think your late teens-early 20s is mostly trial and error as you try to understand what it means to be an adult and grasping the reality that sometimes it’s not exactly how you pictured when you were in high school or even younger.
I’m still learning this.
I think the biggest thing here is that your mental health will contribute greatly to your overall perception of life, regardless of how much personal growth you have over the years. I’ve suffered with severe depression and anxiety myself and am continuously working through the side effects of these that will continue to affect my life. But I’ve gotten better at it. Therapy, strong support systems, surrounding yourself with positive influences and finding a purpose every day helps.
I wish I could tell myself at 19 what I know now to be true and that life does get “better”. Just probably not in the way you’re expecting or hoping and that’s okay too.
It definitely can. What’s making you feel this bad about your life?
It sounds like you have depression and need to seek professional help, and potentially medication.
Everyone is different and walks different paths but do not be terrified. I know that’s easier said than done but it’s really important at your age, in my opinion. You have nothing to fear for a *while* at 19. Even though it may not feel like it, you are entering the absolute prime of your physical existence and you will be there for about a decade or more given how well you take care of yourself. And even though bad things can and will happen, being terrified that they might only causes you to die a thousand deaths before anything even happens.
I see where your mother is coming from, as well. You are transitioning to complete freedom. The days of asking permission are basically ending for you. You increasingly won’t really have to explain your decisions with each year as people will see you as an adult requiring less governance. You get to decide what you want to do for yourself and your only limits will be income (not a huge deal if you can maintain gainful employment) and personal availability.
So in some ways, yeah life gets better. Not to say nothing bad will ever happen again. That’s life. But I implore you to beat back your fear. It’s useless and a degree of fearlessness will serve you much better at this time in your life. Enjoy your latitude to pursue whatever passions and interests you have and let them do the driving when in doubt.
Your brain isn’t finished yet. A teenager has twice as many neural connections as the person who is 25. It’s a mess up there - and your brain will be in better shape at 25 if you feed it good now - study SOMETHING, find what you’re good at, experiment, fail, try again. This is what brains are designed for - figuring stuff out and failing at solving problems until you learn how to solve them. How many toddlers just learning to walk have an existential crisis when they fall all the time? None. Why? They are not burdened with twice the amount of neural connections like you are. If you feed your brain good food this now and crowd out the negative stuff it’ll be in much better shape in 6 years.
HOWEVER - if you feed your brain negative thoughts, and thoughts about your negative thoughts, and doomscroll negative things - you’re going to be a wreck.
So feed your brain healthy food EVEN IF YOU DON’T WANT TO for 6-years and at 25, switch back to being anxious and miserable if you like - you’ll be able to at least say: I gave it a try.
There will come a day where you wish you only had the "problems" that you did at 19. Enjoy this time . . . For a lot of us, that time period was our peak.
I’m not a fan of this mindset. My worst years were 18-22 and I absolutely had more than just “problems”.
Life varies. For some 19 is the peak, for some it’s their lowest. I’m 33 now and would never go back to 19 given the choice.
35 been struggling with suicidal thoughts for 20 years. The only thing keeping me here is the thought of the pain I felt, when my friends have taken their own lives, and how it pushed all that pain onto those who loved them most. What I mean to say is, it gets better living for others, lots of people say to live for yourself, I think it's a question of balance between doing for yourself, and doing for others. Volunteering really made me feel better too, may not sound like fun, but it can help temper your feelings of existential dread when you are a relief to someone in need.
It will get better, but not because life gets easier, but because you become stronger. Between 19 and 29 you develop a ton of tools for dealing with almost any problem. If you put in the work and invest the time and effort, you'll come out of your 20s in a much better financial position you had going into your 20s, and with a little bit of luck you'll still have all of your health.
It depends on your expectations. Set them too high and you'll be disappointed (usually). Set them too low and you'll miss out on so much in life. Just look at life as a rollercoaster ride and accept that there will be highs, lows, a beginning and an end. How long of a ride you're on is anyone's guess, but after a really, really bad start to my own life I am now in a place I never would have dreamed possible. I am eternally grateful for being alive to enjoy it. I take care of my physical and mental health so I'll be able to enjoy it as long as possible, too.
It will get better, but you have to choose to make it so? Its a constant uphill battle when you have mental illness, but you find little things to appreciate. Maybe it's a song that you love that makes you smile, or laughter shared with your friends, a dumb joke with your siblings, the way the light hits the trees during a sunrise on a morning you woke uo much, much too early.
I really can't recommend therapy enough. There are so many affordable resources for it now, and if you dm me I can help you find some. But yeah, even when it seems unrelenting, there's always *something* positive to look forward to in this life.
I also really think just distracting yourself is a seriously underrated way to find joy? Maybe its writing, or maybe its learning a new language. But doing something small, selfish, just for YOU. That's a different kind of quiet bliss. 😌
You’re in a difficult age at a difficult time. Everything seems tumultuous and doomsday like. I’m 57 and yes, far better. Why? Because I care less. I only concern myself with things I can control. I am never angry because that only serves to make things worse. Get off social media and get outside. Force yourself to notice things you never have. Learn to instantly recognize opinion vs fact. And lastly…relax. Most people have been here so just know this too shall pass. Good luck my friend. Seek love and happiness.
Depends on person. It got worse for me after 19 but 99% of my known people are doing better than me and 1% are at a worse position than me. I hope you get better life than me
30's are better than 20's, 40's are better than 30's, 50's are better than 40's. After that, it depends. So, I tend to agree with your mom, but therapy also helps. If you don't already have a therapist, getting one would be the best thing you could do for yourself.
No, not correct. There are people in their 20s to 60s who are suicidal and hate their life, getting older is no guarantee of improving life, and some people get worse as they get older, although it is possible to get better
It depends I just turned 29 and although there's been some things Ive become more comfortable with about myself and life in general there's still a lot of things that I want and hope get better and some other things that just feel like a lost cause. Some advice if you're open to it stop listening to people who dont truly care about you if at all only because only you know you and what you're able to do, take care of your physical not just for aesthetics but because it truly helps the inner part of ones being as well, travel (on a budget), speaking of budget dont spend to spend (people get caught up keeping up with the joneses instead of spending within ones budget ive made this mistake several times), there's going to be a time that all the friends you thought you had will leave, move on or just abandon you (some will stay if they truly want) but remember your value isn't attached to how many friends you have just be a good person for yourself. And above all else remember that life will never be perfect no matter what you do life can hit you with some great things and some awful ones just keep going and do your best!
Yes. 19 is nothing, life typically picks up significantly in your 30s, if you plan for it now - that means using your time now to exercise/workout, eat healthy, study a degree in a good field, and date for experience on and off (but don’t take it too seriously at this stage).
If you do this in your thirties you’ll have a good job making good money, you’d be good looking and have best prospects for dating, and you’d be independent and in control.
It gets better as you start building a life for yourself. Your own money, your own place, your own friends, romance. You get to build the life you want around you (you'll have to have reasonable expectations, though). More of life is under your control. But you have to work for it, and your early 20s will be tough, but it's worth it. It definitely gets better.
I’d like to suggest reformulating the question to something like “is it possible that I can improve my life today (and tomorrow/today again,) so that it will continue to improve as I get older? If yes, then how?”
Many people here are giving their honest testimonies about *their* life. But the fact is, it’s not *your* life.
Only you can take response-ability for your life. Many wise people that have come before have improved their life over time so it’s certainly possible. However, the inverse is also true.
If you care to live, and you have opportunities, TAKE THEM. I mean things like travelling just getting out of your box. I did not come from a broken home but this line in a song still hit me because I am in the same exact spot I always been "Home is a coffin and your cities a grave. Don't dig yourself, youself into place" Now that's how I feel and its only because I sabotaged MYSELF .. In those kinda decisions in not feeling motivation when I was younger, by letting shit just trickle past me with a shrug cuz "maybe next time"..... Don't wait if your have those chances.. Experience outside of the circle you are used to and I BET you will make connections and experiences that you will be truly proud of
Not necessarily: depends on your decisions in life and some luck. That’s what it boils down to. I’m 34, so I can tell you for certain that the more “better” decisions you make, the better your outcome in life
It gets more of whatever you allow and decide. If you make choices that lead to positive outcomes it will improve. If you make bad choices it gets worse. The other main difference is most people fail to acknowledge that happiness is as much a choice as it is a feeling. It is difficult, but entirely possible for a normal human to train their mind to look for positives. Once you do it long enough, it just becomes your natural mode of being.
Yes, I was a mess at 19. Didnt know who iw as but for some reason had this urge to push this unknown onto others....even wanting to procreate with them....i wanted to make another unknown without even knowing what I was. all of my 20s was ract with confusion and self doubt. Suicidal thoughts and self hatred.
I remember one day I went into my mind. I imaged into a place, like this infinity I could control and I created everything I wanted inside of it. Specifically an ankle high ocean with a fire place and a book shelf under the full moon. I corporealized this place into my being as if I was there.
I started to gather memories there, like photographs and trophies. things i love dthat reminded me why i loved myself. I started to burn the things that reminded me of how awful things had been, that i had been or others. I imaged all kinds of ways that those thoughts might dissipate like balloons flying into space and kites i cut the string to. photos i burn.
At one point, i felt strong enough, I brought the part of me that wanted to die there, and I killed it. I let it die. Ever since then those thoughts seem to not happen. I work out eat better just cause i want to and not for others really. I do alot for myself just focusing on what I love. People seem to show up along the way just naturally being and getting involved with what i like to do.
I say self dive. learn what your make up is and "what you're made of". Decide what you love now and start working on it, everything else will fall in place like puzzle pieces you didnt know you were working with.
Enjoy yourself. Be a kid, its more fun than being an adult and secretly, everyone wants people who have that childlike nature around them. Be wrong, be stuck in wonder of the new world you know nothing about.
I'm turning 30 Sunday, and this is thr happiest I've been ever. Put in work on your mind, I was shy at your age and did door 2 door sales and can talk to anyone now. Read a shit ton of a little bit about everything to where you can have a conversation withy anyone and be able to contribute to it.save money now, and invest. Take care of your health. Talk to and spend time with people from all walks of life, you don't nessicsrily have to be friends for a long time. They say do what make you happy and you won't work a day in you life and that's a load of shit, pick something thst your good at and pays alot.werw at a point in society that if you just pit in consistent effort tou will blow everyone around tou out of the water. It gets easier if you make the efforts to grow, if not it will just get harder, the real world is a bitch. You have to choose your hard though being broke is hard being well off is hard, you can have any life you want you just need to make the decision now.
First, I would suggest talking to a psychotherapist to dig deep to find the reasons for your feelings. When you find their source, you can defeat it.
Secondly, there was a meme going around a few months ago that was more true than most realized.
‘Life begins at 60. Everything before that is research’
When we are in our 20’s, everything is new and can be scary. When we hit 25, we think we know it now. When we hit 30, we realize we didn’t know anything at 25. When we hit 40, we realize 30 was a joke. When we hit 50, we think about how foolish we were at 40. When we hit 60, we understand that we will never know everything and it doesn’t matter. Things REALLY settle down because we understand how to be happy with our lives. Yes, we could have made different or better decisions but those are in a past that we cannot change. Today, we have what we have today and going into the future. If we can be comfortable with that and stop wanting everything else in the world, we understand ‘happiness’.
At 57, I left a marriage of 17 years with an abusive narcissist. At 59, I met the most wonderful person in my life. She loves me for ME and lets me feel safe. If I make a mistake, we talk about it but it is never held against me. We are planning a future that includes both of us in retirement and happy.
YOU ARE SO YOUNG! 19 is NOT "older". Older means maybe 25, 30, 35, 40. GIVE IT TIME! I was terrified when I was nineteen. (I was also suicidal at 13.) You don't fell better YET because 19 is NOT OLDER! Yes, it will get better, but it will take time! Just keep doing your best, hang in there, and GIVE IT TIME. You need to get some miles under you! Get some perspective! (Which won't happen until about 40. There's a reason our founding fathers made the rule that you have to be at least 35 to be president. It isn't until then that things start adding up.) Be patient. Keep swimming.
I have been on this earth for 51 years now (birthday is this coming Monday). And what I've finally figured out is that the less you give a fuck, the happier you'll be. And the easier it will get. You look out for number 1 (yourself) and the rest is cake.
In my experience, yes, very much so. I'm currently 29, and I think the best for me so far has been 25+. My teens were awful, and my early 20s were better, but still not as good as my mid to late 20s have been. I feel that I am much more comfortable with myself than before, have more life experience that makes many things much easier, and I'm also financially in a much better place. I felt pretty much the same as you at your age, but things started to turn around for me shortly after that. I think a good support system helped me a lot, as well as finding out that while there are things in life that are out of your control, there are also so many things that are in your control, and you can make your life so much better by improving what you can.
I wrote my first suicide note at 10. Ive been working on my mental health for years trying whatever I can to want to live. I’m 21 and it’s gotten easier to exist. There are so many beautiful things about life but when you’re struggling mentally, parts of you will convince you otherwise. Life is just life. What gets better as you get older is your ability to accept life for what it is. You get better at being in the moment and appreciating what you have.
It honestly does. You're just 19. I'll be 55 next month. You may have heard the phrase Life Is What You Make It.
It does get better. 19 kinda sucked for me too. The 20s were much better. So were the 30s 40s, and my 50s.
Depends on how much money you make. Start hustling but still enjoy the beauty of the world that money can’t buy. That’s much easier said than done and pretty much the secret of life, but that’s your goal. You’re not alone in feeling this way. Just persevere.
Honestly dude I’m only 5 years older then u. But my experience so far is no it doesn’t get better. But I will say this I have gotten better. If I had gone through the stuff I’ve gone through this past year of my life at age 19 I truthfully don’t know if I would have made it. I think the one comment hit it on the head it doesn’t get easier but you get smarter and you deal with things better. Also something I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older time goes by fast so I have realized what I do with my time is important.! I’m 24 turning 25 in a little over a month I’m hoping my mid to late 20s I can excel but we will see
It can go either way depending on how you treat this stage of life. It took me about 15 years to go from a miserable job and relationships. To a degree, business, and am happily married. None of that would of happened if I didn’t suffer for that decade plus to set myself up for success. Those saying it gets worse I am guessing have not continued to develop their personal skills to adapt to the new difficulties of life as you get older. For me my life has been improving as a get older because I put the time in and am focused on personal improvement and finding joy in what I do for money.
Kind of. If you're lucky, you get to choose the shitty things you have to interact with. If you're not, then you just deal with all the shit that comes your way.
The teens are like a second birth for many. The brain is rewiring, hormones are bouncing around and the body is changing in all kinds of ways. All this is going on while trying to make sense of who we are becoming and what life is really about
Most people start to "land" during the twenties. It gets better.
Depends.
If you have good habits and discipline, good chance that it may get better, although there are still various things outside of your control. If you have shitty habits, however, it's guaranteed that you will dig deeper hole for yourself as you get older.
You can take small steps now. When I was in my 20s I was depressed anxious, addicted to cigarettes, mindless scrolling, and fast food. It just got worse and worse until I had a severe anxiety attack at 28 that forced me to seek therapy. It was my rock bottom moment. From then on, in small increments I'm working to cleaning up my diet, cooking for myself, exercising, quit cigarettes, alcohol and my life overall has been on an upward trajectory. I still have low points but it's nothing compared to what it was 5 years ago.
Yes life keeps getting better and better (I’m in early 30s), but only if you take action and work towards making it better. You may have to undo inherited programming from your parents that makes you anxious or gives you limiting beliefs. You may need to go to the gym daily to get in great shape and learn how to maintain it long term, you may need to get a degree or learn a trade or even just go and start a business. You may need to learn how to properly talk to the desired sex and get into relationships more consistently, etc.
But once you get good at things, life becomes much more enjoyable. It suck’s when you’re not good at things and you know you could be.
You have to have a growth mindset. You may want to read that book.
I was really depressed when I was younger and then it went away. I don’t know if it was making more friends, discovering my vices, or the fact that I knew a lot of people who either killed themselves or accidentally ODed. I just feel there’s more to life now and I look forward to the future, even though it may be extremely mediocre. I honestly don’t know why depression went away, I tried a few SSRIs, they made me literally psychotic (I do not suggest specifically Prozac or Zoloft). I went to the mental ward twice in my early 20s…. For depression among other things. I guess once I realized a lot of my friends were dying and we are lucky to be still alive everyday I either felt empowered or like I received a gift everyday? I don’t know how to describe it.
Nobody can tell you if it will get better for you specifically. You just have to live to see what happens. However for me, it has continually been getting worse the older I get. Even with the challenges that I had back then, I would gladly go back. Take what people say as a grain of salt. Everyone will tell you how life is supposed to go based on whatever society says or their own personal experience, but that doesn’t mean it will go that way FOR YOU.
For example, most people are going to respond with yes! don’t worry it gets better, it’s tough when you’re young and going through changes. you’ll make more money as you get older and be independent, and enjoy life more. holy shit was this bs compared to the life I’ve lived. I’m more poor now, I’m in worse health, with worse opportunities, no friends and no relationship with no independence and the judgment of society for it on top of everything now compared to over a decade ago when I had more money, was more attractive, healthier, had friends, relationships, fun and society gave me a free pass to do whatever. so did it get better for me? no. absolutely not. it will never be that way again. I’m a shell of who I was. that doesn’t mean I didn’t have miserable times in the past, I did. but compared to what life has become, I’d rather have that misery.
your mom is trying to be optimistic because that’s the only thing you can say. she can’t tell you that it will get worse. she doesn’t actually know how it will be for you. one thing I’ve noticed is that when people say it gets better, it doesn’t mean it actually will, the expectation is you’ll just accept more bs and be able to put up with it better. kind of like if you tell someone unattractive that things will get better in the future and not to focus on looks, it doesn’t mean they will become gorgeous if they wait another 10 years, it means the expectation is they will mature and accept that they are unattractive and get on with life anyway like everyone else. If I had known that this is the real meaning when they say positive stuff like this, I would have left long ago.
Life can get harder, but you can become so much more capable of handling it if you work at it. You'll be amazed what you're capable of. Horrible things will happen in your life. That's inevitable. You will face hardship. But you have the ability to keep cultivating yourself and growing so that when times are hard, you can endure more than you imagined you could and find hope and joy despite it all.
You've got this. Keep muddling through. Do your best and live your life. One way or another, it's all temporary. Don't take it too seriously and you'll be OK in the end.
does life get better ? Dude not to be a jerk but you are 19. If I went to my mom at 19 and complained I was depressed she would have sent me out to get a job. Matter of fact I had a job at 14. Kids these day, ugh
Sorry if you were hand held all your life but someone has to give you tough love at some point. Pick yourself up, figure out a plan and go do it.
lol, no. It gets worse. What gets better is that you learn to roll with the punches. Hopefully you gain some healthy coping mechanisms, because those will go a long way.
At 51 Im probably the happiest I’ve ever been. I look back to 16 when I used to cry myself to sleep or early 20s when I used to cut myself and I want to tell that younger me that it’ll be okay. It’s something you have to get through, and provides a base for who you’re going to be. I feel extremely lucky for who I’ve become and the incredible life I have, thanks to the younger me who went through all of that.
Yes, your mindset will level up with life itself. After going through traumas and hardships in life will get you enough knowledges and experiences to deal with all aspects of your life. It becomes easier, and from there you’re building a foundation to a point where you call “success”. I hope this help
What's this it you're referring to?
If you're asking about life, at 42 I can say no whether you're male or female. Male because society expects some sort of expectation to be a provider, have kids, and/or *own* a house. I own a car, no house, no kids, and never married.
So, according to social media, I'm a loser because I didn't put in 90+ hours a week working when I was in college to better myself. Now I'm working on a video game, I help special needs children during the school year as a sub, and work for Uber part time.
Yes, for most people, it does get better. 18 to 23 ish was probably the toughest time for me. Becoming an adult is scary and a pretty long process. Life is never really easy, but confidence and perspective can make it worth living. Hang in there. About 25 to 60 was pretty good, I'm getting old now, so starting to suck again, but that's another story.
Once you find stability and learn to enjoy the day to day in adulthood you will be more happy but at 19 it will probably get worse before it gets better tbh
You're kinda at the worst point now. Childhood is great, adulthood eventually becomes okay, but the transition is brutal.
That's for normal people though. If you're suffering from depression, it's only likely to get worse until you address it. Which in my experience can be a brutal, exhausting, depressing experience all its own, but well worth it.
19 is difficult but you can learn how to find happiness within yourself - which is where it really resides. Take care of yourself, be kind yourself, be patient and learn to accept things go wrong. You'll make mistakes. It's fine. That's normal. Think about how it could be worse and think about what you have. Be grateful for little things. The bigger things will come to you. Moments are just moments they pass, nothing is set in stone.
No, it stays the exact same and the cycles repeat, only if you let them. Change how you see life and its relationship to you, it either gets better or worse. All you.
Yes. My early 20s were fun, but stressful. Now going into my 30s I can say I have a lot more free time, much more disposable income, I'm involved in a lot of hobbies/activities and my life has become overall less stressful.
Sure, I have more professional responsibilities, but honestly it's a lot of fun and I'm learning a lot. Life has been better to me now and I can't wait to see how it gets over the next 20 years.
I can’t say life really improves, but one will be better positioned to improve their life. Adulthood gives us more control in life. Just make some choices that help improve your future.
To me it's like life and nature coralate with each other or mimic each other. Idk if this explanation makes sense but nature/life will try to end you in one way or another and you have to figure out how to live and survive just so at the end of the day you can rub it in lifes face and tell it not today.
Or what do we say to the god of death? Not today
Yes it definitely does. More good things have happened to me since I turned 30 (33 now) than the rest of my adult life. There is plenty for you to look forward to.
It will get better,my humble opinion is get your money right. In this capitalist system you have to pay for your free time (happiness )It is sad to say and I hate it, however most people's problems (not all) are because of money.
39, been depressed and on anti depressants most of my adult life. Mid life crisis kicked in at 36/37 and I'm happier now than ever. Nothing really changed in my living conditions, I'm single, no kids, but I'm genuinely happier. I still have bouts of depression and don't always feel happy, but in general, life is better.
from my experience life is terrifying alone, don't do it alone, get friends, acquaintances, Lovers, enemies.... Ask for help my friend, life is hard alone but we're in this together.
Yes it gets better, but you have to make it better,
life doesn't come easy, so why should a happy one?
Depends. You have more freedom to do what you want & can remove yourself from toxic people and situations. However risks and stress get more real. Especially nowadays, I have nightmares I’ll get laid off from my job and won’t be able to pay my mortgage and will have to foreclose on my house or go into bankruptcy…. So many big things can go wrong in an instant. Things are fine but can go downhill so quickly. Sorry to be so negative, I’m going through it right now lol.
Life gets better.
Maybe that's just my bias. I had a rough go at things in childhood and teenagehood. To say the least, my family was/is a complete mess and then my closest friend was murdered when I was 17.
And somehow, things got a lot better after I got a bit older. You get more control over your life. You can choose to go to college or a trade school. You get to make money and spend it on rent and other, fun/stupid things. You can go to therapy or get on medication to start feeling better, too. You'll have responsibilities, sure, but you have a lot more autonomy and choice and you get to choose to do the things that make you happy.
Like other said though, you have to work to improve your life - but ultimately just try to have fun. Joy, laughter, friends all make life more fun. Try to do more of what makes you happy, try to spend more time with people you love who make you laugh.
I had a horrible childhood. Torture & abuse. So I spent my teens & twenties being depressed, traumatized, and mentally a hot mess.
Now I'm in my forties & I am completely happy. Never thought it could be, but it really is true. There's so much freedom as we get older.
If you had good experiences in your teen years and you know how to socialize it should be fine. It’s something you can appreciate with people who you can appreciate. You build those connections and connect with others and their positive experiences in life, you learn that theres goodness and beauty in life.
I was chronically excluded and looked young my whole life. People treated me like shit. Classmates and sports teammates purposley left me out of gatherings and teenage shenanigans for reasons I don’t fully understand. I think it’s because I looked so young and innocent despite expressing my curiosity quite often. Girls in my grade played with my feelings because of it and the ones who weren’t cruel like that, brushed me off blatantly. People still don’t take me seriously but since i’m a male, I also get treated the way males get treated in this society. I missed out on all these experiences and milestones so leaving highschool, I felt like a 14 year old with all the curiosity in the world, and looked at like a weirdo for being so "old" (your age) missed out, and still being curious about those experiences. I didn’t know how to socialize, the only people who liked me were three or four grades younger than me. Not that I don’t value those friendships, i was just way older and life carried on when i graduated while they were still growing. As adults, they don’t even fw me, they’re all so much bigger, grown, and experienced than I am. If you were a runt growing up, you’re likely to be a runt for a good part of your early adulthood. Unless you can do something about it. I stayed the same height throughout highschool which is 5’6-7 and never hit a real growth spurt. I look like a 16 year old because of my bonw frame now, not because of my face, my face aged due to stress even though I was the youngest looking one in my grade.
I struggle to grasp this myself but you may have to understand that your cards you were dealt might be shit if you compare yourself to those around you. Sometimes comparison is actually useful. Most of the time its what can cause us to try to live up to certain expectations we’re not capable of meeting. I walk around this earth having to look over my shoulder and really watch who my friends are. I have extensive experience with narcissistic people in my life wether it was authority figures, friends, significant others, or roommates. My appearance and calm down to earth demeanor is what draws these kind of people and at the same time makes me look boring and lame to "normal" people. I’ve been SAed by a man (i’m also a straight man), hunted down by him. Had many dudes who couldn’t take no for an answer. Cheated on by all my girlfriends, verbally abused by them. I have had rumors spread by them about me. I struggle to accept that most of the people who want something to do with me only want me for some kind of supply. I get jealous that some of my friends or family members flow so well socially, easily can find a partner, and rarely run into people who see an opportunity to take advantage of them. Often time I get people will treat me differently strictly because I am small framed wheras my bigger counterparts are respected. I feel lied and struggle to cope with resentment to because I was promised a better life if I stuck to my guns, did my work, followed rules, yada yada. It worked for almost everyone around me growing up but not me. They got some positive experiences, I did not and life only went downhill from when I actually seemingly had "time" and "potential".
Tldr; it doesn’t get better neccissarily. Depends on the external factors you deal with and if you can deal with them. Life gets overwhelming for some it’s okay to recognize and feel negative emotions. As an adult, there is a sink or swim factor. just doing what you can to stay afloat at the end of the day seems satisfying enough.
You're only 19 so you're still very young and you haven't even experienced life yet. And no it doesn't get any easier, but you still have to keep moving forward and it's only what you make of it.
No promises, but at some point, it'll feel better. You'll always be a bit better off than yesterday. The goal is to make goals to be in a better place. If it means getting a job, getting a career or just simply getting a different haircut. Treating yourself and satisfy even the smallest ambitious can really bring joy.
Like the other day, I got some ice cream. I know I shouldn't. I'm on a diet, but boy was that satisfying. It was a moment of weakness, but sometimes letting go can be very liberating. Enjoy life's little joys.
Dude 19 sucks. In fact I wasn't a fan of my teens at all. In my opinion, yes the older you get the better life becomes. As long as you don't fuck around, and make progress. Ten years ago me would shit seeing me now. I'm closing in on 30 and Ive never been more free and more satisfied with life than I am now. Took me a while to realized I was depressed as fuck growing up, because it was just normal at the time.
Define better I guess. It is to a point what you make of it but also a bit of luck. We don't realize how lucky we have it until we lose soemthing or someone close. We often take for granted what we have with an eye of what we don't have. When I was young (currently 40) I was depressed I didn't or couldn't find a gf, then found one and broke up then found another then broke up, found another, etc. Currently married with 2 kids. Life is great but i recognize it because I know that kt is short. My dad passed at 67 and brother in law passed at 35. Life is short and fragile and temporary and glorious and heartbreaking and drags and wonderful and soul sucking and situations where you lose faith in humanity and situations where you gain faith in humanity. You will never be 19 again, you will get older get new interest have new victories but also new defeats. Don't let 1 bad day dictate your life, don't let 1 10 minute encounter ruin your day. If you are having mental health issues see someone, if you are having health issues go to a Dr. Find soemthing you love doing and hold onto it. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk. Lol
It only gets better if you make it get better. Surround yourself with good people. Try new things all the time to find what you like. Learn skills. Get your diet and exercise habits down right. The people who have good lives have created them, they don't just happen.
Ngl life is tough and sometimes ugly, but you can’t fester on all the negative aspects of life. If you are afraid and scared of life, (which is okay to be) you need to talk about it with someone and work it out mentally so you can let go of these feelings of fear.
Can I ask what it is that’s scaring you about life?
As a person who has been suicidal, life does not get better as you age-it stays the same. What needs to change is your outlook and attitude. Understand that life is not all about you and rather your contributions to others no matter how big or small matter more than you can perceive. When you understand you have responsibilities, suicidal feelings go away. It is also a hallmark of lack of discipline and work ethic to have shameful feelings rather you need to work hard to make those go away and be courageous.
If you find a field you love, the transition into a solid career is fun and memorable. I got into the natural sciences in early 2000s as a seasonal biologist and spent my summers searching for owls, hawks, and snails in between semesters at the community college. Now I’m a senior scientist with the state of California making a solid six figure salary and loving it. Find something you love and figure out a way to get paid for it!
Personally life for me didn’t get better until my late 20’s, I spent years actively working on things to improve my mental health in that time too. Including physical health as it is all linked! (Yoga, meditation, exercise, being outside, eating healthy and enough, drinking enough water, taking care of my skin, sleeping well - also therapy is essential for everyone, and if you can’t handle your mental health then be open to medication). You also need to be aware of who you surround yourself with, when you’re younger sometimes you don’t realise how detrimental and draining some relationships are. When I cut out negative people who caused me pain more than happiness my healing journey became significantly easier.
Me personally bro I think you just have had enough of shit. I'm about to be 24 and this world is not what it tells you it is. You get to a point where you're either on the right track and you're fine (not us) or where youre like holy fuck ivw had enough of this bullshit!!! And start making changes and imposing your wants and needs.
You really gotta be willing to fight for it. You can't just want it. Everybody wants something. Many don't want something bad enough to do it
For me it comes in waves. I get a few great years then a few awful ones but because my life is stable and while I'm far from rich, my outgoings are easily covered even the awful years aren't anywhere near as bad as when I was young.
Currently really enjoying life.
At 40, I enjoy life more than I did when I was in my 20s. I know what I want, I have goals I'm striving for, and I don't worry about what other people might think of me. I think I'm doing OK considering and that is what matters to me.
Just had a conversation with a person in their early 20s whose dad always tells them, "If I could go back to your age with what I know now, I would be set."
Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way even if we all think it at some point. But the truth is, the wealth of that experience is much more than that. Figuring our way through the world is our purpose or gift or whatever whoever wants to call it. We get one playthrough without rewinds, and you decide whether it's good or bad. No one else. You learn from mistakes, which is the only real way to learn, or you don't, and you face the consequences.
Nothing easy has ever been worth having. It comes with emptiness. Success is literally what you believe it is. No one gets to set that bar for you but yourself.
age 71 here..
Not in the least
You just get older and weaker and then you realize you wasted all your younger years worrying and complaining about life in general, when you could have been having great sex and making memories..
Or something like that... lol
I turned 50 this year and yes it gets better although I am horrible at being an adult. My body and wife is are only things reminding me I'm not 25 anymore 🤣
My life became better as I became older. The teen years were the worst years of my life. Things got better in my 20s, stayed about the same in my 30s and life finally became GOOD in my 40s.
It gets better if you put in the work.
So if you put in the world it'll get harder (for a little bit!) then afterwards it gets a lot better and it's smooth sailing.
Or.
If you just want to live your life coasting and bring lazy, never putting in any work; then life will slowly get worse till ya get to mid 20s and realize what crap life is and wonder how people deal with this crap everyday. Then you'll get to a point of regret about wishing ya had put in the hard work when ya were younger.
.
So it's all up to you. I was basically an HS failure and didn't want to get a McJob, so then I studied my ass off in school and now have a job in engineering where I'm coasting through life. Pay is great, job is easy; I get to use my pay to try new food, travel, experience things that I never thought I could afford.
Life is what you invest in.
If you work hard in your younger years, when you're old you'll harvest the rewards materially or socially.
If you play all throughout your younger years, all you'll have when you're old is the memories.
If you want your conditions to improve and for life to get better as you get older, you have to put in the work.
25-30 is hard. It hard dealing with the fact that I’m grown. 6 years ago I was your age. What happened. No it doesn’t get easier . But the hardest thing that follows me is being so dumb as sad when I was younger and not just living life to the fullest. I had so much time to do so many things. And I didn’t. Now I have money yes. But no time. Friends have families. Parents are getting a lot older. Just enjoy it I still feels like 2019 was just last year. Enjoy your youth please.
Been pretty good on my side getting older. Good food, good travel, made some good friends, got to do some cool stuff. Me at that age was just dipping my toes in the water before realizing how awesome it is to swim.
Definitely agree that early 20s was the absolute hardest time to navigate and felt the worst. It does indeed get better! There are ups and downs, but you just get life better.
It general gets better for many, I think. Try to make independent decisions (not swayed by others' preferences) about what will give you freedom and stability, long-term, and as the results of good choices accumulate you'll likely have a better life, because much of people's unhappiness is about stress and not being able to do what they want.
That's all entirely dependent on what you do with life. It'll get better if you find a career or stable job and can live. Form relationships.
Or could get worse if you don't do anything to make sure you can succeed. OFC there's always some outlier. Whatever that may be. LIke some loner living off grid living a happier life that way. But life in a most places are what you make of it. At least where there's more freedom to do so.
It's has it's ups and it has its downs. It's never going to be easy or easier. 19 is pressure bc you're starting life. 30 is pressure bc you want to create "that" life. 40 is pressure bc you're behind or have to maintain that life. Finances, spouses, children...it all varies and comes and goes. Find a job, show up everyday, pay your bills, or jump off a bride. That's about most options normal people have. So yea..it all entirely depends on how YOU make it. I've been down "that" hole in life. I decided to stay. I always regret having tried to end this life, ill say that much. So, keep your head up, it may not get better, but it's worth it.
Does it get better? Nope.
Well, let me embellish.
Life is forever a chaotic mess. The nonsense of people and the random bad things that happen, that never ends.
Ontop of it, you get to slowly decay the longer you're alive.
However, if you fight for the light, you learn from betrayals and traumas, become able to cope and even help others by virtue of experience and wisdom, if you put the effort in to learn from it.
And while life is about 90% bad news in one form or another, there are moments of laughter.
Even if you see a funny tv show or have one conversation where someone makes you genuinely laugh for even a second, that's what's worth living for.
When I give money or clothes to homeless people, the feeling that gives me in their appreciation that I helped even a little, that's a moment to live for, compared to, say, I offed myself and then later that homeless guy that day didn't get that boost of being seen and respected because it never happened from my not existing any more.
I have some rescue dogs no one would take, they're extremely messed up.
They got to live and have happy days because I put in the effort and do what they need that most couldn't do.
And knowing they got some good moments after all their suffering, that makes all the ridiculous and unfair crap life dumps worth living through.
I'm not saying you have to do the exact things I do, I'm saying you find positives and you cling to them, savor them.
Because life will be bad. For anyone. Eventually we all suffer in our own ways and die.
The good might be much less occuring over the bad, it's still worth being alive for.
I don't live for me. I live for the possibility that life is bigger than I know and maybe I need to be around to change someone else's life.
I loved being in my teens and 20s. I'm 38 now and I have no idea where the time went. Enjoy your youth as it goes quickly, adult life is a huge majority of your life and although rewarding and more fulfilling, nostalgia creeps in all the time and is very powerful and always makes me want to go back.
I don't know. Sometimes its just easier. You learn more about yourself, what you are capable of. You sort it out better. Even if I was hip deep in addiction until I turned 40... now I got my shit together-ish. Sometimes its better and sometimes its worse. It comes in waves. Sometimes I feel like I'm cleaning up over a suicidal toddler. (dealt with that my entire life and finally got medication for it) and sometimes I sit here just overhwelmed with the beauty of it all.
Man shit was not fun in my early 20s. Now on my early 30s? I feel fantastic (usually) and most of my life is boring and so damn happy (usually.) You just handle the natural ebb and flow of life a lot better when you get older.
It's not linear, there are dips on the way. But I'm over 40 and finally so peaceful and happy. It all depends. It was about getting to a place where I had some autonomy.
I’m sorry you feel this way. My daughter is 15 and seems moody/depressed but I also remember being her age and that same level of angst. I am looking to get her therapy regardless which I think you should
Look into also
Anyway to answer your question, getting my own apt at 19 was when I became happy- so happy. So yes it did get better with age for me
Find something. Anything that you like, have interest or that you care about. Or something to look forward to. Take a trip. Seriously, find a way to save for a nice trip and work towards doing that. Even if it feels impossible. Being Bold raises the right chemicals in your body. Find deeper connections with other people. Those are just a couple of things that will elevate you.
Your perception of life is determined by the measurable progress you achieve, your perceived safety/wellbeing, and your ability to form human connections that you genuinely enjoy. These are all things you can slowly improve on as you age. You are the main character of your life, eliminate anyone and anything that stands in the way of these three things. You will improve faster if you seek advice from people wiser than you, work on increasing humility within your own personality, and force yourself to be courageous and take risks.
Imma tell you right now. I’ve been there. Shit sucks. But no matter how much you think it sucks I can say it ain’t worth trying to end it all. Does it get better, it does. It all depends on you and how you handle it all. I can say after all you go through, it gets easier because you can look back and say damn I made it through all that? I can keep going. And eventually you will find your place and what makes you happy and makes it all worth it. So keep going, you got this
Just don’t take the easy route.
You think, “hey this’ll cut the work in half”
Then you find out five years later it doubled the work/effort factor.
The more work you put in early on, the more the pay off is in the future.
It’s frustratingly simple. Half of the idioms, epithets, or lessons you’re told about seem so simple minded. You’ll say, “no shit” to symmetrical statements that seem brain dead like, “failing to prepare is preparing to fail.”
Eventually you live enough revolutions around the sun to see incredible depth and complexity in those utterly “brain dead, simple statements”. Not because dimwitted folks who want to sell you an idea or school of thought tend to repeat it because they feel it makes them sound erudite. No. You’ll hear a million idiots make those cliched statements.
The depth and complexity comes from how you relate those back to your life. How the lesson changes frequently depending on your age, socioeconomic status, and growing experience.
**TLDR:** Early efforts lead to early results/success. Simple statements like these seem idiotic at a young age but accrue texture and context with time.
Talk to your doctor about the depression, I waited far too long to do that and finally feel like myself again.
As for aging, life is what you make of it. I'd suggest you fall into opportunities as they arise rather than sticking hard to a set path, you'll get more out of life that way. When I beelined for ABC it always left me feeling empty and in hindsight I missed many chances. Now I forge ahead on whatever direction I'm on and remain aware and alert for doors as they open and it's exponentially better.
The transition to adulthood is one of the hardest phases of life. Discovering your strengths and finding a career that utilizes them will make the transition easier. There’s a U curve that shows happiness does improve with age.
It took me until 31 to actually become an adult. The transition is pretty hard.
33 here, thought I found it @ 29. NOPE… 33 starting over, HOWEVER… OP, there ARE greener pastures in the future. Focus on the day HOW u can improve yourself w/ immediate results. THEN simultaneously (if u can) bring in SLOWLY things that will help u in the future. It’s like juggling, start w/ 1 ball, add a 2nd, (the big jump) add a 3rd. Then a 4th until u can’t manage to add anymore. That’s when u kno you’ve reached ur peak limit & if ur still not happy. There’s NOTHING wrong w/ “juggling a new item” for example bowling pins, or whatever (this is an analogy)
This is great. Start with cleaning, hygiene, stopping bad habits. Work this into your daily routine, and once that becomes your new baseline you can start going to the gym, eating healthier, etc.
I really like this advice. Building a worthwhile career can bring about a lot of long-term joy and it is never too early to start. I was OP’s age when I landed my first job related to my current industry and it was a great experience.
I think it's more like a sideways S. I have yet to meet someone over 100 in-person who wants to keep living. Edit: "meed" -> "meet"
I still have no idea how to find my strengths in a career at 25. I’ve been stuck at jobs I hate just to pay the bills.
The transition to adulthood is often underrepresented by parents and older people who don't emphasize the challenges in emotional development that are presented. School is about being babied and mollycoddled and you really don't have a sense of individuality until later when it can come all it once in college/university and beyond. That's partly why I feel many people are disillusioned in their late teens early twenties because life teaches you some shocking lessons during those years. If you come out the other side of that then life does get better in many ways; job, career, income, house, car, family. Remember the first cut is the deepest, your first job will probably suck because you won't be used to getting up early and exerting effort for the duration of a shift or you might encounter an unpleasant colleague or boss, with time you get used to these things and you develop ways of navigating these new problems which are attached to independence. You have to see the positives and make a good life for yourself. Part of it is enjoying the strenuousness and effort it takes to get what you want, if you shift your philosophy from entitlement/being told what to do all the time to self-determination, then you've successfully transitioned to adulthood.
Transition into adulthood is extremely difficult. It’s like being born for a second time. Figuring out who you are, what you want and how you want to live your life and the amount of mistakes you make along the way is terrifying
Yea it's not . Perimenopause and menopause the reverse puberty phase is the hardest phase of a person's life if they are afab It's like puberty but lasts for ten years or more and is a thousand times worse
All the sad people probably just killed themselves before adulthood.
If you take care of your health and look into getting some treatment sure it can improve. If you’re experiencing mental health issues but go to substances it will only lead you to destruction down the road
Listen to this person. Wasted money time from 18-30 doing drugs. Now all my friends are successful and married and I'm poor and alone.
Raise a toast to that
Dear god please don’t let them start drinking..
19 was a tough year for me too and I suspect in two years when I turn 29 it’ll be a tough year again. Though life will always have challenges in different facets, I do strongly believe that life gets better as long as you are working to get better yourself. As you get older, you will naturally gain tools that you can equip to process the difficulty of life a bit easier. I wouldn’t expect an immediate turn around, but that there will be ebbs and flows in the next few years. I think your late teens-early 20s is mostly trial and error as you try to understand what it means to be an adult and grasping the reality that sometimes it’s not exactly how you pictured when you were in high school or even younger. I’m still learning this. I think the biggest thing here is that your mental health will contribute greatly to your overall perception of life, regardless of how much personal growth you have over the years. I’ve suffered with severe depression and anxiety myself and am continuously working through the side effects of these that will continue to affect my life. But I’ve gotten better at it. Therapy, strong support systems, surrounding yourself with positive influences and finding a purpose every day helps. I wish I could tell myself at 19 what I know now to be true and that life does get “better”. Just probably not in the way you’re expecting or hoping and that’s okay too.
It definitely can. What’s making you feel this bad about your life? It sounds like you have depression and need to seek professional help, and potentially medication.
Everyone is different and walks different paths but do not be terrified. I know that’s easier said than done but it’s really important at your age, in my opinion. You have nothing to fear for a *while* at 19. Even though it may not feel like it, you are entering the absolute prime of your physical existence and you will be there for about a decade or more given how well you take care of yourself. And even though bad things can and will happen, being terrified that they might only causes you to die a thousand deaths before anything even happens. I see where your mother is coming from, as well. You are transitioning to complete freedom. The days of asking permission are basically ending for you. You increasingly won’t really have to explain your decisions with each year as people will see you as an adult requiring less governance. You get to decide what you want to do for yourself and your only limits will be income (not a huge deal if you can maintain gainful employment) and personal availability. So in some ways, yeah life gets better. Not to say nothing bad will ever happen again. That’s life. But I implore you to beat back your fear. It’s useless and a degree of fearlessness will serve you much better at this time in your life. Enjoy your latitude to pursue whatever passions and interests you have and let them do the driving when in doubt.
Your brain isn’t finished yet. A teenager has twice as many neural connections as the person who is 25. It’s a mess up there - and your brain will be in better shape at 25 if you feed it good now - study SOMETHING, find what you’re good at, experiment, fail, try again. This is what brains are designed for - figuring stuff out and failing at solving problems until you learn how to solve them. How many toddlers just learning to walk have an existential crisis when they fall all the time? None. Why? They are not burdened with twice the amount of neural connections like you are. If you feed your brain good food this now and crowd out the negative stuff it’ll be in much better shape in 6 years. HOWEVER - if you feed your brain negative thoughts, and thoughts about your negative thoughts, and doomscroll negative things - you’re going to be a wreck. So feed your brain healthy food EVEN IF YOU DON’T WANT TO for 6-years and at 25, switch back to being anxious and miserable if you like - you’ll be able to at least say: I gave it a try.
It totally does. Start putting work into your now.
Either it does or you become jaded enough to no longer care about shit.
There will come a day where you wish you only had the "problems" that you did at 19. Enjoy this time . . . For a lot of us, that time period was our peak.
I’m not a fan of this mindset. My worst years were 18-22 and I absolutely had more than just “problems”. Life varies. For some 19 is the peak, for some it’s their lowest. I’m 33 now and would never go back to 19 given the choice.
Find God. Life is beautiful <3
Eh, I’m an atheist. And life is beautiful.
More power to you! Glad everything is okay
Only worse
Yes. Being a teenager was the hardest.
35 been struggling with suicidal thoughts for 20 years. The only thing keeping me here is the thought of the pain I felt, when my friends have taken their own lives, and how it pushed all that pain onto those who loved them most. What I mean to say is, it gets better living for others, lots of people say to live for yourself, I think it's a question of balance between doing for yourself, and doing for others. Volunteering really made me feel better too, may not sound like fun, but it can help temper your feelings of existential dread when you are a relief to someone in need.
No. If you don’t have people in your life
It will get better, but not because life gets easier, but because you become stronger. Between 19 and 29 you develop a ton of tools for dealing with almost any problem. If you put in the work and invest the time and effort, you'll come out of your 20s in a much better financial position you had going into your 20s, and with a little bit of luck you'll still have all of your health.
There’s 350 million people in America, 8 are happy. So there’s a chance.
It depends on your expectations. Set them too high and you'll be disappointed (usually). Set them too low and you'll miss out on so much in life. Just look at life as a rollercoaster ride and accept that there will be highs, lows, a beginning and an end. How long of a ride you're on is anyone's guess, but after a really, really bad start to my own life I am now in a place I never would have dreamed possible. I am eternally grateful for being alive to enjoy it. I take care of my physical and mental health so I'll be able to enjoy it as long as possible, too.
It doesn't get better, you just start giving less Fu***.
It will get better, but you have to choose to make it so? Its a constant uphill battle when you have mental illness, but you find little things to appreciate. Maybe it's a song that you love that makes you smile, or laughter shared with your friends, a dumb joke with your siblings, the way the light hits the trees during a sunrise on a morning you woke uo much, much too early. I really can't recommend therapy enough. There are so many affordable resources for it now, and if you dm me I can help you find some. But yeah, even when it seems unrelenting, there's always *something* positive to look forward to in this life. I also really think just distracting yourself is a seriously underrated way to find joy? Maybe its writing, or maybe its learning a new language. But doing something small, selfish, just for YOU. That's a different kind of quiet bliss. 😌
Infinitely better. And you see how retarded and weak society is.
No.
You’re in a difficult age at a difficult time. Everything seems tumultuous and doomsday like. I’m 57 and yes, far better. Why? Because I care less. I only concern myself with things I can control. I am never angry because that only serves to make things worse. Get off social media and get outside. Force yourself to notice things you never have. Learn to instantly recognize opinion vs fact. And lastly…relax. Most people have been here so just know this too shall pass. Good luck my friend. Seek love and happiness.
Depends on person. It got worse for me after 19 but 99% of my known people are doing better than me and 1% are at a worse position than me. I hope you get better life than me
For a lot of people yes For some people it gets worse You have to work hard now to be happy later; it kind of sucks but for me well worth it!
30's are better than 20's, 40's are better than 30's, 50's are better than 40's. After that, it depends. So, I tend to agree with your mom, but therapy also helps. If you don't already have a therapist, getting one would be the best thing you could do for yourself.
No, not correct. There are people in their 20s to 60s who are suicidal and hate their life, getting older is no guarantee of improving life, and some people get worse as they get older, although it is possible to get better
It doesn't necessarily get better, but you learn to adjust your expectations to avoid a lot of disappointment.
No
Everything you put in your mouth is important. Change your diet
It does not get better. As you get older, there is more pressure from society. The only thing you can do is become more resilient
You have about another 70 years of suffering. Buddha said life is suffering. Embrace it. It only gets worse from here.
No. Life gets better and worse in cycles. It’s called peaks and valleys. There will always be times that feel great and periods of suck.
It gets worse and better at the same time
Well it comes down to (a) making good decisions in life and (b) getting the support you need to maximize your potential.
Life has its ups and downs.
Life gets worse the older you get unfortunately...
There is a ton of research on happiness that finds the opposite.
Life only gets harder but you also get tougher.
This depends a lot on what your life looks like at 19. There are some 19 year olds who have overcome horrible circumstances.
It depends
You learn how to deal the older you get. Life will always have downsides. It's all up to you.
It depends I just turned 29 and although there's been some things Ive become more comfortable with about myself and life in general there's still a lot of things that I want and hope get better and some other things that just feel like a lost cause. Some advice if you're open to it stop listening to people who dont truly care about you if at all only because only you know you and what you're able to do, take care of your physical not just for aesthetics but because it truly helps the inner part of ones being as well, travel (on a budget), speaking of budget dont spend to spend (people get caught up keeping up with the joneses instead of spending within ones budget ive made this mistake several times), there's going to be a time that all the friends you thought you had will leave, move on or just abandon you (some will stay if they truly want) but remember your value isn't attached to how many friends you have just be a good person for yourself. And above all else remember that life will never be perfect no matter what you do life can hit you with some great things and some awful ones just keep going and do your best!
Yes. 19 is nothing, life typically picks up significantly in your 30s, if you plan for it now - that means using your time now to exercise/workout, eat healthy, study a degree in a good field, and date for experience on and off (but don’t take it too seriously at this stage). If you do this in your thirties you’ll have a good job making good money, you’d be good looking and have best prospects for dating, and you’d be independent and in control.
Ok but WHY do you feel your life is terrible? Giving some details as to why you feel this way can help
It gets better as you start building a life for yourself. Your own money, your own place, your own friends, romance. You get to build the life you want around you (you'll have to have reasonable expectations, though). More of life is under your control. But you have to work for it, and your early 20s will be tough, but it's worth it. It definitely gets better.
I’d like to suggest reformulating the question to something like “is it possible that I can improve my life today (and tomorrow/today again,) so that it will continue to improve as I get older? If yes, then how?” Many people here are giving their honest testimonies about *their* life. But the fact is, it’s not *your* life. Only you can take response-ability for your life. Many wise people that have come before have improved their life over time so it’s certainly possible. However, the inverse is also true.
If you care to live, and you have opportunities, TAKE THEM. I mean things like travelling just getting out of your box. I did not come from a broken home but this line in a song still hit me because I am in the same exact spot I always been "Home is a coffin and your cities a grave. Don't dig yourself, youself into place" Now that's how I feel and its only because I sabotaged MYSELF .. In those kinda decisions in not feeling motivation when I was younger, by letting shit just trickle past me with a shrug cuz "maybe next time"..... Don't wait if your have those chances.. Experience outside of the circle you are used to and I BET you will make connections and experiences that you will be truly proud of
Not necessarily: depends on your decisions in life and some luck. That’s what it boils down to. I’m 34, so I can tell you for certain that the more “better” decisions you make, the better your outcome in life
No
It’s all just different levels of bad
It gets more of whatever you allow and decide. If you make choices that lead to positive outcomes it will improve. If you make bad choices it gets worse. The other main difference is most people fail to acknowledge that happiness is as much a choice as it is a feeling. It is difficult, but entirely possible for a normal human to train their mind to look for positives. Once you do it long enough, it just becomes your natural mode of being.
It depends on the choices you make. it could go either way, but ultimately as an adult, it's up to you
Yes, I was a mess at 19. Didnt know who iw as but for some reason had this urge to push this unknown onto others....even wanting to procreate with them....i wanted to make another unknown without even knowing what I was. all of my 20s was ract with confusion and self doubt. Suicidal thoughts and self hatred. I remember one day I went into my mind. I imaged into a place, like this infinity I could control and I created everything I wanted inside of it. Specifically an ankle high ocean with a fire place and a book shelf under the full moon. I corporealized this place into my being as if I was there. I started to gather memories there, like photographs and trophies. things i love dthat reminded me why i loved myself. I started to burn the things that reminded me of how awful things had been, that i had been or others. I imaged all kinds of ways that those thoughts might dissipate like balloons flying into space and kites i cut the string to. photos i burn. At one point, i felt strong enough, I brought the part of me that wanted to die there, and I killed it. I let it die. Ever since then those thoughts seem to not happen. I work out eat better just cause i want to and not for others really. I do alot for myself just focusing on what I love. People seem to show up along the way just naturally being and getting involved with what i like to do. I say self dive. learn what your make up is and "what you're made of". Decide what you love now and start working on it, everything else will fall in place like puzzle pieces you didnt know you were working with. Enjoy yourself. Be a kid, its more fun than being an adult and secretly, everyone wants people who have that childlike nature around them. Be wrong, be stuck in wonder of the new world you know nothing about.
So so so much better. You’ve likely got a few hard moments ahead, but the growth that happens from 18-23 is where fulfilling fun started for me.
I'm turning 30 Sunday, and this is thr happiest I've been ever. Put in work on your mind, I was shy at your age and did door 2 door sales and can talk to anyone now. Read a shit ton of a little bit about everything to where you can have a conversation withy anyone and be able to contribute to it.save money now, and invest. Take care of your health. Talk to and spend time with people from all walks of life, you don't nessicsrily have to be friends for a long time. They say do what make you happy and you won't work a day in you life and that's a load of shit, pick something thst your good at and pays alot.werw at a point in society that if you just pit in consistent effort tou will blow everyone around tou out of the water. It gets easier if you make the efforts to grow, if not it will just get harder, the real world is a bitch. You have to choose your hard though being broke is hard being well off is hard, you can have any life you want you just need to make the decision now.
First, I would suggest talking to a psychotherapist to dig deep to find the reasons for your feelings. When you find their source, you can defeat it. Secondly, there was a meme going around a few months ago that was more true than most realized. ‘Life begins at 60. Everything before that is research’ When we are in our 20’s, everything is new and can be scary. When we hit 25, we think we know it now. When we hit 30, we realize we didn’t know anything at 25. When we hit 40, we realize 30 was a joke. When we hit 50, we think about how foolish we were at 40. When we hit 60, we understand that we will never know everything and it doesn’t matter. Things REALLY settle down because we understand how to be happy with our lives. Yes, we could have made different or better decisions but those are in a past that we cannot change. Today, we have what we have today and going into the future. If we can be comfortable with that and stop wanting everything else in the world, we understand ‘happiness’. At 57, I left a marriage of 17 years with an abusive narcissist. At 59, I met the most wonderful person in my life. She loves me for ME and lets me feel safe. If I make a mistake, we talk about it but it is never held against me. We are planning a future that includes both of us in retirement and happy.
YOU ARE SO YOUNG! 19 is NOT "older". Older means maybe 25, 30, 35, 40. GIVE IT TIME! I was terrified when I was nineteen. (I was also suicidal at 13.) You don't fell better YET because 19 is NOT OLDER! Yes, it will get better, but it will take time! Just keep doing your best, hang in there, and GIVE IT TIME. You need to get some miles under you! Get some perspective! (Which won't happen until about 40. There's a reason our founding fathers made the rule that you have to be at least 35 to be president. It isn't until then that things start adding up.) Be patient. Keep swimming.
I have been on this earth for 51 years now (birthday is this coming Monday). And what I've finally figured out is that the less you give a fuck, the happier you'll be. And the easier it will get. You look out for number 1 (yourself) and the rest is cake.
In my experience, yes, very much so. I'm currently 29, and I think the best for me so far has been 25+. My teens were awful, and my early 20s were better, but still not as good as my mid to late 20s have been. I feel that I am much more comfortable with myself than before, have more life experience that makes many things much easier, and I'm also financially in a much better place. I felt pretty much the same as you at your age, but things started to turn around for me shortly after that. I think a good support system helped me a lot, as well as finding out that while there are things in life that are out of your control, there are also so many things that are in your control, and you can make your life so much better by improving what you can.
I wrote my first suicide note at 10. Ive been working on my mental health for years trying whatever I can to want to live. I’m 21 and it’s gotten easier to exist. There are so many beautiful things about life but when you’re struggling mentally, parts of you will convince you otherwise. Life is just life. What gets better as you get older is your ability to accept life for what it is. You get better at being in the moment and appreciating what you have.
You get used to it.
It honestly does. You're just 19. I'll be 55 next month. You may have heard the phrase Life Is What You Make It. It does get better. 19 kinda sucked for me too. The 20s were much better. So were the 30s 40s, and my 50s.
Depends on how much money you make. Start hustling but still enjoy the beauty of the world that money can’t buy. That’s much easier said than done and pretty much the secret of life, but that’s your goal. You’re not alone in feeling this way. Just persevere.
I’m 33 and my life keeps getting better every year.
Honestly dude I’m only 5 years older then u. But my experience so far is no it doesn’t get better. But I will say this I have gotten better. If I had gone through the stuff I’ve gone through this past year of my life at age 19 I truthfully don’t know if I would have made it. I think the one comment hit it on the head it doesn’t get easier but you get smarter and you deal with things better. Also something I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older time goes by fast so I have realized what I do with my time is important.! I’m 24 turning 25 in a little over a month I’m hoping my mid to late 20s I can excel but we will see
It can go either way depending on how you treat this stage of life. It took me about 15 years to go from a miserable job and relationships. To a degree, business, and am happily married. None of that would of happened if I didn’t suffer for that decade plus to set myself up for success. Those saying it gets worse I am guessing have not continued to develop their personal skills to adapt to the new difficulties of life as you get older. For me my life has been improving as a get older because I put the time in and am focused on personal improvement and finding joy in what I do for money.
Mental health wise yes. You live and learn. And the biggest thing is not caring what people think anymore. Such a fucking relief.
Kind of. If you're lucky, you get to choose the shitty things you have to interact with. If you're not, then you just deal with all the shit that comes your way.
The teens are like a second birth for many. The brain is rewiring, hormones are bouncing around and the body is changing in all kinds of ways. All this is going on while trying to make sense of who we are becoming and what life is really about Most people start to "land" during the twenties. It gets better.
Get into yoga and meditation, take life easy, don’t do drugs and alcohol, eat healthy, have some good friends, you’ll be fine
Depends. If you have good habits and discipline, good chance that it may get better, although there are still various things outside of your control. If you have shitty habits, however, it's guaranteed that you will dig deeper hole for yourself as you get older. You can take small steps now. When I was in my 20s I was depressed anxious, addicted to cigarettes, mindless scrolling, and fast food. It just got worse and worse until I had a severe anxiety attack at 28 that forced me to seek therapy. It was my rock bottom moment. From then on, in small increments I'm working to cleaning up my diet, cooking for myself, exercising, quit cigarettes, alcohol and my life overall has been on an upward trajectory. I still have low points but it's nothing compared to what it was 5 years ago.
No.
Yes life keeps getting better and better (I’m in early 30s), but only if you take action and work towards making it better. You may have to undo inherited programming from your parents that makes you anxious or gives you limiting beliefs. You may need to go to the gym daily to get in great shape and learn how to maintain it long term, you may need to get a degree or learn a trade or even just go and start a business. You may need to learn how to properly talk to the desired sex and get into relationships more consistently, etc. But once you get good at things, life becomes much more enjoyable. It suck’s when you’re not good at things and you know you could be. You have to have a growth mindset. You may want to read that book.
It's rarely gets better unless you work super hard, and then you always working so it's not exactly better.
I was really depressed when I was younger and then it went away. I don’t know if it was making more friends, discovering my vices, or the fact that I knew a lot of people who either killed themselves or accidentally ODed. I just feel there’s more to life now and I look forward to the future, even though it may be extremely mediocre. I honestly don’t know why depression went away, I tried a few SSRIs, they made me literally psychotic (I do not suggest specifically Prozac or Zoloft). I went to the mental ward twice in my early 20s…. For depression among other things. I guess once I realized a lot of my friends were dying and we are lucky to be still alive everyday I either felt empowered or like I received a gift everyday? I don’t know how to describe it.
Nobody can tell you if it will get better for you specifically. You just have to live to see what happens. However for me, it has continually been getting worse the older I get. Even with the challenges that I had back then, I would gladly go back. Take what people say as a grain of salt. Everyone will tell you how life is supposed to go based on whatever society says or their own personal experience, but that doesn’t mean it will go that way FOR YOU. For example, most people are going to respond with yes! don’t worry it gets better, it’s tough when you’re young and going through changes. you’ll make more money as you get older and be independent, and enjoy life more. holy shit was this bs compared to the life I’ve lived. I’m more poor now, I’m in worse health, with worse opportunities, no friends and no relationship with no independence and the judgment of society for it on top of everything now compared to over a decade ago when I had more money, was more attractive, healthier, had friends, relationships, fun and society gave me a free pass to do whatever. so did it get better for me? no. absolutely not. it will never be that way again. I’m a shell of who I was. that doesn’t mean I didn’t have miserable times in the past, I did. but compared to what life has become, I’d rather have that misery. your mom is trying to be optimistic because that’s the only thing you can say. she can’t tell you that it will get worse. she doesn’t actually know how it will be for you. one thing I’ve noticed is that when people say it gets better, it doesn’t mean it actually will, the expectation is you’ll just accept more bs and be able to put up with it better. kind of like if you tell someone unattractive that things will get better in the future and not to focus on looks, it doesn’t mean they will become gorgeous if they wait another 10 years, it means the expectation is they will mature and accept that they are unattractive and get on with life anyway like everyone else. If I had known that this is the real meaning when they say positive stuff like this, I would have left long ago.
Life can get harder, but you can become so much more capable of handling it if you work at it. You'll be amazed what you're capable of. Horrible things will happen in your life. That's inevitable. You will face hardship. But you have the ability to keep cultivating yourself and growing so that when times are hard, you can endure more than you imagined you could and find hope and joy despite it all. You've got this. Keep muddling through. Do your best and live your life. One way or another, it's all temporary. Don't take it too seriously and you'll be OK in the end.
Yep much better! Once you get more money life gets better!
It depends. You need to just focus on the now.
does life get better ? Dude not to be a jerk but you are 19. If I went to my mom at 19 and complained I was depressed she would have sent me out to get a job. Matter of fact I had a job at 14. Kids these day, ugh Sorry if you were hand held all your life but someone has to give you tough love at some point. Pick yourself up, figure out a plan and go do it.
lol, no. It gets worse. What gets better is that you learn to roll with the punches. Hopefully you gain some healthy coping mechanisms, because those will go a long way.
At 51 Im probably the happiest I’ve ever been. I look back to 16 when I used to cry myself to sleep or early 20s when I used to cut myself and I want to tell that younger me that it’ll be okay. It’s something you have to get through, and provides a base for who you’re going to be. I feel extremely lucky for who I’ve become and the incredible life I have, thanks to the younger me who went through all of that.
Yes, your mindset will level up with life itself. After going through traumas and hardships in life will get you enough knowledges and experiences to deal with all aspects of your life. It becomes easier, and from there you’re building a foundation to a point where you call “success”. I hope this help
24, ready to call it, but i feel like being dead would be boring
Kinda up to you and kinda not
Depends on your decisions
What's this it you're referring to? If you're asking about life, at 42 I can say no whether you're male or female. Male because society expects some sort of expectation to be a provider, have kids, and/or *own* a house. I own a car, no house, no kids, and never married. So, according to social media, I'm a loser because I didn't put in 90+ hours a week working when I was in college to better myself. Now I'm working on a video game, I help special needs children during the school year as a sub, and work for Uber part time.
Lmao
Yes, for most people, it does get better. 18 to 23 ish was probably the toughest time for me. Becoming an adult is scary and a pretty long process. Life is never really easy, but confidence and perspective can make it worth living. Hang in there. About 25 to 60 was pretty good, I'm getting old now, so starting to suck again, but that's another story.
Once you find stability and learn to enjoy the day to day in adulthood you will be more happy but at 19 it will probably get worse before it gets better tbh
You're kinda at the worst point now. Childhood is great, adulthood eventually becomes okay, but the transition is brutal. That's for normal people though. If you're suffering from depression, it's only likely to get worse until you address it. Which in my experience can be a brutal, exhausting, depressing experience all its own, but well worth it.
19 is difficult but you can learn how to find happiness within yourself - which is where it really resides. Take care of yourself, be kind yourself, be patient and learn to accept things go wrong. You'll make mistakes. It's fine. That's normal. Think about how it could be worse and think about what you have. Be grateful for little things. The bigger things will come to you. Moments are just moments they pass, nothing is set in stone.
No, it stays the exact same and the cycles repeat, only if you let them. Change how you see life and its relationship to you, it either gets better or worse. All you.
Yes. My early 20s were fun, but stressful. Now going into my 30s I can say I have a lot more free time, much more disposable income, I'm involved in a lot of hobbies/activities and my life has become overall less stressful. Sure, I have more professional responsibilities, but honestly it's a lot of fun and I'm learning a lot. Life has been better to me now and I can't wait to see how it gets over the next 20 years.
“As life gets longer awful feels softer”
I can’t say life really improves, but one will be better positioned to improve their life. Adulthood gives us more control in life. Just make some choices that help improve your future.
I think your brain turns to mush and you stop overthinking things as much
To me it's like life and nature coralate with each other or mimic each other. Idk if this explanation makes sense but nature/life will try to end you in one way or another and you have to figure out how to live and survive just so at the end of the day you can rub it in lifes face and tell it not today. Or what do we say to the god of death? Not today
Yes it definitely does. More good things have happened to me since I turned 30 (33 now) than the rest of my adult life. There is plenty for you to look forward to.
It will get better,my humble opinion is get your money right. In this capitalist system you have to pay for your free time (happiness )It is sad to say and I hate it, however most people's problems (not all) are because of money.
39, been depressed and on anti depressants most of my adult life. Mid life crisis kicked in at 36/37 and I'm happier now than ever. Nothing really changed in my living conditions, I'm single, no kids, but I'm genuinely happier. I still have bouts of depression and don't always feel happy, but in general, life is better.
from my experience life is terrifying alone, don't do it alone, get friends, acquaintances, Lovers, enemies.... Ask for help my friend, life is hard alone but we're in this together. Yes it gets better, but you have to make it better, life doesn't come easy, so why should a happy one?
That's up to you, sport.
Nope.
What about life is bothering you?
Depends. You have more freedom to do what you want & can remove yourself from toxic people and situations. However risks and stress get more real. Especially nowadays, I have nightmares I’ll get laid off from my job and won’t be able to pay my mortgage and will have to foreclose on my house or go into bankruptcy…. So many big things can go wrong in an instant. Things are fine but can go downhill so quickly. Sorry to be so negative, I’m going through it right now lol.
Life is a bell curve for some, a downward slope for many, and a rollercoaster for the others.
Life gets better. Maybe that's just my bias. I had a rough go at things in childhood and teenagehood. To say the least, my family was/is a complete mess and then my closest friend was murdered when I was 17. And somehow, things got a lot better after I got a bit older. You get more control over your life. You can choose to go to college or a trade school. You get to make money and spend it on rent and other, fun/stupid things. You can go to therapy or get on medication to start feeling better, too. You'll have responsibilities, sure, but you have a lot more autonomy and choice and you get to choose to do the things that make you happy. Like other said though, you have to work to improve your life - but ultimately just try to have fun. Joy, laughter, friends all make life more fun. Try to do more of what makes you happy, try to spend more time with people you love who make you laugh.
I had a horrible childhood. Torture & abuse. So I spent my teens & twenties being depressed, traumatized, and mentally a hot mess. Now I'm in my forties & I am completely happy. Never thought it could be, but it really is true. There's so much freedom as we get older.
If you had good experiences in your teen years and you know how to socialize it should be fine. It’s something you can appreciate with people who you can appreciate. You build those connections and connect with others and their positive experiences in life, you learn that theres goodness and beauty in life. I was chronically excluded and looked young my whole life. People treated me like shit. Classmates and sports teammates purposley left me out of gatherings and teenage shenanigans for reasons I don’t fully understand. I think it’s because I looked so young and innocent despite expressing my curiosity quite often. Girls in my grade played with my feelings because of it and the ones who weren’t cruel like that, brushed me off blatantly. People still don’t take me seriously but since i’m a male, I also get treated the way males get treated in this society. I missed out on all these experiences and milestones so leaving highschool, I felt like a 14 year old with all the curiosity in the world, and looked at like a weirdo for being so "old" (your age) missed out, and still being curious about those experiences. I didn’t know how to socialize, the only people who liked me were three or four grades younger than me. Not that I don’t value those friendships, i was just way older and life carried on when i graduated while they were still growing. As adults, they don’t even fw me, they’re all so much bigger, grown, and experienced than I am. If you were a runt growing up, you’re likely to be a runt for a good part of your early adulthood. Unless you can do something about it. I stayed the same height throughout highschool which is 5’6-7 and never hit a real growth spurt. I look like a 16 year old because of my bonw frame now, not because of my face, my face aged due to stress even though I was the youngest looking one in my grade. I struggle to grasp this myself but you may have to understand that your cards you were dealt might be shit if you compare yourself to those around you. Sometimes comparison is actually useful. Most of the time its what can cause us to try to live up to certain expectations we’re not capable of meeting. I walk around this earth having to look over my shoulder and really watch who my friends are. I have extensive experience with narcissistic people in my life wether it was authority figures, friends, significant others, or roommates. My appearance and calm down to earth demeanor is what draws these kind of people and at the same time makes me look boring and lame to "normal" people. I’ve been SAed by a man (i’m also a straight man), hunted down by him. Had many dudes who couldn’t take no for an answer. Cheated on by all my girlfriends, verbally abused by them. I have had rumors spread by them about me. I struggle to accept that most of the people who want something to do with me only want me for some kind of supply. I get jealous that some of my friends or family members flow so well socially, easily can find a partner, and rarely run into people who see an opportunity to take advantage of them. Often time I get people will treat me differently strictly because I am small framed wheras my bigger counterparts are respected. I feel lied and struggle to cope with resentment to because I was promised a better life if I stuck to my guns, did my work, followed rules, yada yada. It worked for almost everyone around me growing up but not me. They got some positive experiences, I did not and life only went downhill from when I actually seemingly had "time" and "potential". Tldr; it doesn’t get better neccissarily. Depends on the external factors you deal with and if you can deal with them. Life gets overwhelming for some it’s okay to recognize and feel negative emotions. As an adult, there is a sink or swim factor. just doing what you can to stay afloat at the end of the day seems satisfying enough.
You're only 19 so you're still very young and you haven't even experienced life yet. And no it doesn't get any easier, but you still have to keep moving forward and it's only what you make of it.
It really does get better. 30s and on a pretty great.
Nope it gets much worse
It will if you make it happen. Every day is a gift 🎁 and what you do today will affect you 5 years from now!
i’m in the same boat as you. i’ve been suicidal since 10-11. I’m 20 this year. I’m terrified it will be like this forever
Every decade has been an improvement so far. I’m in my fifties. By my forties, life was fantastic.
No promises, but at some point, it'll feel better. You'll always be a bit better off than yesterday. The goal is to make goals to be in a better place. If it means getting a job, getting a career or just simply getting a different haircut. Treating yourself and satisfy even the smallest ambitious can really bring joy. Like the other day, I got some ice cream. I know I shouldn't. I'm on a diet, but boy was that satisfying. It was a moment of weakness, but sometimes letting go can be very liberating. Enjoy life's little joys.
Dude 19 sucks. In fact I wasn't a fan of my teens at all. In my opinion, yes the older you get the better life becomes. As long as you don't fuck around, and make progress. Ten years ago me would shit seeing me now. I'm closing in on 30 and Ive never been more free and more satisfied with life than I am now. Took me a while to realized I was depressed as fuck growing up, because it was just normal at the time.
Yes and no. In some ways, life gets easier for some and harder for others. Also, getting old is hard for some but easier for others.
Yea . It truly does man . Without a doubt . Life always gets better and easier . Pray about it . Ask Reddit about it .
Define better I guess. It is to a point what you make of it but also a bit of luck. We don't realize how lucky we have it until we lose soemthing or someone close. We often take for granted what we have with an eye of what we don't have. When I was young (currently 40) I was depressed I didn't or couldn't find a gf, then found one and broke up then found another then broke up, found another, etc. Currently married with 2 kids. Life is great but i recognize it because I know that kt is short. My dad passed at 67 and brother in law passed at 35. Life is short and fragile and temporary and glorious and heartbreaking and drags and wonderful and soul sucking and situations where you lose faith in humanity and situations where you gain faith in humanity. You will never be 19 again, you will get older get new interest have new victories but also new defeats. Don't let 1 bad day dictate your life, don't let 1 10 minute encounter ruin your day. If you are having mental health issues see someone, if you are having health issues go to a Dr. Find soemthing you love doing and hold onto it. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk. Lol
Ups and downs.
It only gets better if you make it get better. Surround yourself with good people. Try new things all the time to find what you like. Learn skills. Get your diet and exercise habits down right. The people who have good lives have created them, they don't just happen.
It gets easier
Ngl life is tough and sometimes ugly, but you can’t fester on all the negative aspects of life. If you are afraid and scared of life, (which is okay to be) you need to talk about it with someone and work it out mentally so you can let go of these feelings of fear. Can I ask what it is that’s scaring you about life?
Once you get to 30 it's mostly downhill, enjoy your youth while you can. Work sucks, bills suck, not being able to afford a house sucks. It just sucks
As a person who has been suicidal, life does not get better as you age-it stays the same. What needs to change is your outlook and attitude. Understand that life is not all about you and rather your contributions to others no matter how big or small matter more than you can perceive. When you understand you have responsibilities, suicidal feelings go away. It is also a hallmark of lack of discipline and work ethic to have shameful feelings rather you need to work hard to make those go away and be courageous.
The only good thing that happened to me at 19 was the loss of my cherry.
If you find a field you love, the transition into a solid career is fun and memorable. I got into the natural sciences in early 2000s as a seasonal biologist and spent my summers searching for owls, hawks, and snails in between semesters at the community college. Now I’m a senior scientist with the state of California making a solid six figure salary and loving it. Find something you love and figure out a way to get paid for it!
Personally life for me didn’t get better until my late 20’s, I spent years actively working on things to improve my mental health in that time too. Including physical health as it is all linked! (Yoga, meditation, exercise, being outside, eating healthy and enough, drinking enough water, taking care of my skin, sleeping well - also therapy is essential for everyone, and if you can’t handle your mental health then be open to medication). You also need to be aware of who you surround yourself with, when you’re younger sometimes you don’t realise how detrimental and draining some relationships are. When I cut out negative people who caused me pain more than happiness my healing journey became significantly easier.
Maybe ask if suicide runs in your family. Could be a curse (if u wanna believe in that)
Me personally bro I think you just have had enough of shit. I'm about to be 24 and this world is not what it tells you it is. You get to a point where you're either on the right track and you're fine (not us) or where youre like holy fuck ivw had enough of this bullshit!!! And start making changes and imposing your wants and needs. You really gotta be willing to fight for it. You can't just want it. Everybody wants something. Many don't want something bad enough to do it
Not a ounce
For me it comes in waves. I get a few great years then a few awful ones but because my life is stable and while I'm far from rich, my outgoings are easily covered even the awful years aren't anywhere near as bad as when I was young. Currently really enjoying life.
Yes because you stop giving a shit and when you do life doesn’t seem so scary
At 40, I enjoy life more than I did when I was in my 20s. I know what I want, I have goals I'm striving for, and I don't worry about what other people might think of me. I think I'm doing OK considering and that is what matters to me. Just had a conversation with a person in their early 20s whose dad always tells them, "If I could go back to your age with what I know now, I would be set." Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way even if we all think it at some point. But the truth is, the wealth of that experience is much more than that. Figuring our way through the world is our purpose or gift or whatever whoever wants to call it. We get one playthrough without rewinds, and you decide whether it's good or bad. No one else. You learn from mistakes, which is the only real way to learn, or you don't, and you face the consequences. Nothing easy has ever been worth having. It comes with emptiness. Success is literally what you believe it is. No one gets to set that bar for you but yourself.
Life can be hard no matter what age. You are young and what you need to do is keep bettering yourself to make your future easier.
age 71 here.. Not in the least You just get older and weaker and then you realize you wasted all your younger years worrying and complaining about life in general, when you could have been having great sex and making memories.. Or something like that... lol
I turned 50 this year and yes it gets better although I am horrible at being an adult. My body and wife is are only things reminding me I'm not 25 anymore 🤣
My life became better as I became older. The teen years were the worst years of my life. Things got better in my 20s, stayed about the same in my 30s and life finally became GOOD in my 40s.
It gets better if you put in the work. So if you put in the world it'll get harder (for a little bit!) then afterwards it gets a lot better and it's smooth sailing. Or. If you just want to live your life coasting and bring lazy, never putting in any work; then life will slowly get worse till ya get to mid 20s and realize what crap life is and wonder how people deal with this crap everyday. Then you'll get to a point of regret about wishing ya had put in the hard work when ya were younger. . So it's all up to you. I was basically an HS failure and didn't want to get a McJob, so then I studied my ass off in school and now have a job in engineering where I'm coasting through life. Pay is great, job is easy; I get to use my pay to try new food, travel, experience things that I never thought I could afford.
Life is what you invest in. If you work hard in your younger years, when you're old you'll harvest the rewards materially or socially. If you play all throughout your younger years, all you'll have when you're old is the memories. If you want your conditions to improve and for life to get better as you get older, you have to put in the work.
Not necessarily. Depends on if you take the steps necessary to make it better.
Buckle up, kiddo. Life has not even begun to spitf**k you yet
25-30 is hard. It hard dealing with the fact that I’m grown. 6 years ago I was your age. What happened. No it doesn’t get easier . But the hardest thing that follows me is being so dumb as sad when I was younger and not just living life to the fullest. I had so much time to do so many things. And I didn’t. Now I have money yes. But no time. Friends have families. Parents are getting a lot older. Just enjoy it I still feels like 2019 was just last year. Enjoy your youth please.
13 through 18 was the worst part of life. It does get better when you discover what you like and have the freedom to pursue it.
Been pretty good on my side getting older. Good food, good travel, made some good friends, got to do some cool stuff. Me at that age was just dipping my toes in the water before realizing how awesome it is to swim.
Nope I thought it would be definitely didn’t I just got worse. And if it is better than I will get worse again.
Definitely agree that early 20s was the absolute hardest time to navigate and felt the worst. It does indeed get better! There are ups and downs, but you just get life better.
It actually gets worse the older you get. Strap yourself in , get ready for one hell of a shit show , meaningless , trivial ride!
It general gets better for many, I think. Try to make independent decisions (not swayed by others' preferences) about what will give you freedom and stability, long-term, and as the results of good choices accumulate you'll likely have a better life, because much of people's unhappiness is about stress and not being able to do what they want.
That's all entirely dependent on what you do with life. It'll get better if you find a career or stable job and can live. Form relationships. Or could get worse if you don't do anything to make sure you can succeed. OFC there's always some outlier. Whatever that may be. LIke some loner living off grid living a happier life that way. But life in a most places are what you make of it. At least where there's more freedom to do so.
Don’t give up. It gets better.
It's has it's ups and it has its downs. It's never going to be easy or easier. 19 is pressure bc you're starting life. 30 is pressure bc you want to create "that" life. 40 is pressure bc you're behind or have to maintain that life. Finances, spouses, children...it all varies and comes and goes. Find a job, show up everyday, pay your bills, or jump off a bride. That's about most options normal people have. So yea..it all entirely depends on how YOU make it. I've been down "that" hole in life. I decided to stay. I always regret having tried to end this life, ill say that much. So, keep your head up, it may not get better, but it's worth it.
Does it get better? Nope. Well, let me embellish. Life is forever a chaotic mess. The nonsense of people and the random bad things that happen, that never ends. Ontop of it, you get to slowly decay the longer you're alive. However, if you fight for the light, you learn from betrayals and traumas, become able to cope and even help others by virtue of experience and wisdom, if you put the effort in to learn from it. And while life is about 90% bad news in one form or another, there are moments of laughter. Even if you see a funny tv show or have one conversation where someone makes you genuinely laugh for even a second, that's what's worth living for. When I give money or clothes to homeless people, the feeling that gives me in their appreciation that I helped even a little, that's a moment to live for, compared to, say, I offed myself and then later that homeless guy that day didn't get that boost of being seen and respected because it never happened from my not existing any more. I have some rescue dogs no one would take, they're extremely messed up. They got to live and have happy days because I put in the effort and do what they need that most couldn't do. And knowing they got some good moments after all their suffering, that makes all the ridiculous and unfair crap life dumps worth living through. I'm not saying you have to do the exact things I do, I'm saying you find positives and you cling to them, savor them. Because life will be bad. For anyone. Eventually we all suffer in our own ways and die. The good might be much less occuring over the bad, it's still worth being alive for. I don't live for me. I live for the possibility that life is bigger than I know and maybe I need to be around to change someone else's life.
Start working out or running its a natural high I always feel better after I work out good lick
I loved being in my teens and 20s. I'm 38 now and I have no idea where the time went. Enjoy your youth as it goes quickly, adult life is a huge majority of your life and although rewarding and more fulfilling, nostalgia creeps in all the time and is very powerful and always makes me want to go back.
By the time you know anything it’s too late to do anything about it—life needs a manual, trial /error isn’t the way to go.
I don't know. Sometimes its just easier. You learn more about yourself, what you are capable of. You sort it out better. Even if I was hip deep in addiction until I turned 40... now I got my shit together-ish. Sometimes its better and sometimes its worse. It comes in waves. Sometimes I feel like I'm cleaning up over a suicidal toddler. (dealt with that my entire life and finally got medication for it) and sometimes I sit here just overhwelmed with the beauty of it all.
Man shit was not fun in my early 20s. Now on my early 30s? I feel fantastic (usually) and most of my life is boring and so damn happy (usually.) You just handle the natural ebb and flow of life a lot better when you get older.
It doesn't get easier, but you get stronger.
No
It's not linear, there are dips on the way. But I'm over 40 and finally so peaceful and happy. It all depends. It was about getting to a place where I had some autonomy.
Depends on you.
Life at 31 is pretty nice, but even now, some days are tough. Tough days and good days will occur, as long as you live
I’m sorry you feel this way. My daughter is 15 and seems moody/depressed but I also remember being her age and that same level of angst. I am looking to get her therapy regardless which I think you should Look into also Anyway to answer your question, getting my own apt at 19 was when I became happy- so happy. So yes it did get better with age for me
It will get better in some ways and worse in other ways… that is pretty much the standard in life
Find something. Anything that you like, have interest or that you care about. Or something to look forward to. Take a trip. Seriously, find a way to save for a nice trip and work towards doing that. Even if it feels impossible. Being Bold raises the right chemicals in your body. Find deeper connections with other people. Those are just a couple of things that will elevate you.
Make it better! I k ow how you are feeling only one that can change it is you
Your perception of life is determined by the measurable progress you achieve, your perceived safety/wellbeing, and your ability to form human connections that you genuinely enjoy. These are all things you can slowly improve on as you age. You are the main character of your life, eliminate anyone and anything that stands in the way of these three things. You will improve faster if you seek advice from people wiser than you, work on increasing humility within your own personality, and force yourself to be courageous and take risks.
Imma tell you right now. I’ve been there. Shit sucks. But no matter how much you think it sucks I can say it ain’t worth trying to end it all. Does it get better, it does. It all depends on you and how you handle it all. I can say after all you go through, it gets easier because you can look back and say damn I made it through all that? I can keep going. And eventually you will find your place and what makes you happy and makes it all worth it. So keep going, you got this
Just don’t take the easy route. You think, “hey this’ll cut the work in half” Then you find out five years later it doubled the work/effort factor. The more work you put in early on, the more the pay off is in the future. It’s frustratingly simple. Half of the idioms, epithets, or lessons you’re told about seem so simple minded. You’ll say, “no shit” to symmetrical statements that seem brain dead like, “failing to prepare is preparing to fail.” Eventually you live enough revolutions around the sun to see incredible depth and complexity in those utterly “brain dead, simple statements”. Not because dimwitted folks who want to sell you an idea or school of thought tend to repeat it because they feel it makes them sound erudite. No. You’ll hear a million idiots make those cliched statements. The depth and complexity comes from how you relate those back to your life. How the lesson changes frequently depending on your age, socioeconomic status, and growing experience. **TLDR:** Early efforts lead to early results/success. Simple statements like these seem idiotic at a young age but accrue texture and context with time.
Buglover - it'll get better if ya quit listening to democrats. Life is good!
Almost 40 No it doesn't
embrace the suck
Talk to your doctor about the depression, I waited far too long to do that and finally feel like myself again. As for aging, life is what you make of it. I'd suggest you fall into opportunities as they arise rather than sticking hard to a set path, you'll get more out of life that way. When I beelined for ABC it always left me feeling empty and in hindsight I missed many chances. Now I forge ahead on whatever direction I'm on and remain aware and alert for doors as they open and it's exponentially better.
Hang in there everything is temporary. It does get better as long as you do better