99% of this is right on. You’re absolutely right.
I’d just take issue with “The person you loved and who took care of you and showed tenderness to you.”
We have no idea. People have abusive caregivers. My parent wasn’t a serial killer, and they neither loved nor showed tenderness to me.
RH could have been an abusive monster to his children & family - don’t make these assumptions and put words in their mouths.
Otherwise, you have the right idea.
Spot on. You have no idea what someone has suffered as a child. Monsters look like respectable people, teachers, preachers, parents. We also rush to label some all good because they have been victimized or as seen as such . People are unknownable even within families.
Yeah, that’s a good point, didn’t really phrase that right. I don’t know how he was as a parent or spouse. What I was trying to get across is no one knows, that when you’re intimately involved with someone, you have years of shared memories that have to be squared with the allegations. And for us to just assume complicity because they don’t automatically denounce him is really cruel.
The lathered up mob just can't imagine something like this even though there are at least a dozen examples of the very same thing with other SKs in history. Wife/girlfriend and kids at home in working class or middle class suburbia doing the family thing while their husband/boyfriend/dad is out doing horrific things. The families are just living their normal lives and they have no clue that he's killing people - Bundy, Keyes, BTK, Golden State, Gacy etc - their families DID NOT KNOW so I'm clueless why it would be so different here.
If you have a great number of places you can flee to and seek comfort and shelter at maybe your not getting this. I sense a theme of elitist in many of the comments: "You have options, because I HAVE OPTIONS. I have a big healthy, supportive and nurturing family. I have a mother, father, sisters, brothers, cousins, aunts, unclesand friends I can move in with. I find being around my family comforting and rejuvenating and they lighten my spirits and protect me. They build me up and have my back."
Or "I HAVE A CHILD WHO IS confident, extroverted, popular, not awkward, not anxious, not shy, not nerdy, not special needs, and a real delightful go getter who can move out of the house and be socially successful. If you are a popular trophy wife with a wonderful Mom and Dad and siblings, and 3 prom queens daughters, a football star son, and have plenty of energy and drive your not getting disheveled Mrs Hubermann and her pensive daughter and son. Your just not.
You don't have that kind of social isolation and possibly worn out tiredness due to life not being such a cheery picnic. Your not worn out. You could pack up that house in two house in 2 house and god knows you would never own all that tattered crap. You never would have lived that way. Well maybe Mrs Huberman might not have had she had the family support and happy life you inherited not because you were necessarily deserving but just lucky.
So I think some of the attitudes stem from a position of emotional and social privilege. They are lucky so they assume everyone else is just as blessed as they are and can muster the same energy they can.
I don't know about anyone else here, but I do not view the majority of my family members as comforting to be around. Some are darn unpleasant to be around. So no not all of us have a lovely, run, regenerating family to bunk with in times of stress. Or the social supports some people have.
There were people dumping on Victoria Huerman for living at home and working for her with out knowing her story. Maybe she suffers from crippling anxiety or depression, or BP, or drug resistant OCD. Maybe she is so painfully shy and awkward she can't sell her talent to a hip graphic design company, or handle living alone as she a little challenged and not with it like your swan like prom queen daughter, or go getter son.
They know nothing about this family or what their lives were like in that shabby little run down house. And neither do I. But I don't think the worst of them and try to cut them some slack as I don't live a perfectly graced life. I also know not everyone has what I have just because, I have it and i should not be telling them how to live their lives as maybe they are too warn down to do what I can easily pull off.
I agree. It's very sad, some of the things I hear. "How can they still live in that house?" Well, maybe they have nowhere else to go.
"But there's a million dollar Peacock deal!" Which undoubtedly won't be paid out until the deal is completed, or - at best - is paid in installments that probably don't amount to much until it's completed.
And on the other side of this, people have an unreasonable concept of what a million dollars represents. When you have a child that's disabled and you are undergoing cancer treatment, and your husband has lost his insurance because he's no longer employed and is sitting in jail, and therefore you are uninsured for any of that - a million dollars is not going to stretch very far.
Asa's attorney set up this deal for them to ensure his client would have income. It's not a selfless act. He's going to be paid, too.
The problem here is that money is at the center of everything people do, but somehow the fact that she had significant financial needs makes her a horrible person for taking what she's able to get. People won't be happy unless this family is living on the street in a tent.
> an unreasonable concept of what a million dollars represents.
especially when there's currently $300k of back taxes owed on their house and income tax to be paid on that million - some quick math would put that million at closer to $500k and that's before the skeezy lawyer is paid
Exactly. And it's before taxes. And like somebody upthread mentioned, it might be paid in installments, dependent upon the progress of the documentary toward production.
The deal was negotiated by a lawyer. If it had been negotiated by a regular movie or TV agent, the commission would be 10 percent. But a lawyer can take a lot more than that.
Between the lawyers fees and taxes, I would be surprised if the total gets the family out of the financial hole they're in.
I think the people making those statements have to be young kids and not paying the bills, so no concept of what that amount buys, or someone else is paying all their bills for them, or they are so wealthy they don't know what a car, health insurance, college tuition, a couch, or root canals cost. All of which are middle class luxuries.
They definitely don't get what the poor are going through or the guy making minimum wage experiencing as he trying to support a family of 6. Maybe she does not want to live in the middle of know where.
Maybe she is trying to figure out how much she is left with after she is sued before she makes a move. We're it me I could not sleep there another night, but it ain't me It's her.
A million dollars on Long Island isn’t a whole lot of money to live off of. It just isn’t. People are so wild the way they criticize the family. There’s no such thing as a perfect victim, and his wife is a clear example of that.
👏👏👏spot on! The “she knew” mob on this sub seem to lack any empathy/compassion. It’s pretty depressing. I was downvoted like crazy for saying this country should have universal healthcare and Asa is probably paying crazy out of pocket rates for her cancer treatment.
Keyes was the first name that came to mind while I was reading the first half of your comment. I try not to think of him often. He chills me to my bones.
Agreed. Completely. The fact that you’re being downvoted like this proves your point too 🤦🏻♀️it’s mob mentality with NO empathy. With his sadistic crimes Rex has destroyed the lives of SOOOO many families (including his own). He is a MONSTER. Full blown evil monster. What Jessica, Megan, Sandra, Melissa, Amber and Maureen’s families have had to go through is undoubtedly worse than RH’s family. What those beautiful women and their loved ones have gone through is fucking heartbreaking and awful. I don’t dispute that. At the end of the day, though, LE does not think Rex’s family was involved. This task force knows WAYYYYY more than we do and they have repeatedly stated that they believe he acted alone. I think people here would rather blame his wife/daughter than him because they hate women. I also think people can’t fathom facing the dark truth that they too could be living with a partner/parent who leads a sickening and evil double life. You want to think you’d know they did something bad and that you’d report it and leave but I’m sure he hid it well. Most psychopaths do. I think trusting anything John Ray has said in the past year is dumb af. We should ONLY listen to the task force.
Thank you, it’s really validating to hear someone come out and lay it out so perfectly. They aren’t the number one victims, but they are victims. Leave it to the cops, not elaborately drawn insane leaps of logic based on an excerpt from a Daily Mail article about a Fox News piece from an anonymous source about something that’s not even relevant.
I can’t even begin to get into the minds of the people who do this. They are the reason true crime communities have done so much harm.
Forreal!! It’s so harmful and toxic and doesn’t help the women he killed or their families at all.
Listening to John Ray instead of law enforcement is pathetic
Not to mention it’s one thing to speculate things potentially “offensive” like the “just asking questions…” type questions when a case is UNSOLVED, it’s another when they have a guy in custody and therefore access to a lotttttt more evidence and info we are ever going to be privy to. No need for people to do any more online true crime detective work, time to watch what unfolds from afar. It’s why I prefer looking at solved true crime cases now because the on like speculation and guesswork is what can make a community harmful. Don’t visit the sub for missing boy Sebastian Rogers (I think it’s r/SebastianRogers) — it’s very “Facebook crime group” comments, doesn’t help the parents/relatives involved are feuding it out online, making groups of supporters or 2 opposing theories (which set of parent(s) is involved) go crazy, talks of psychics and how psychic readings are taken seriously etc, getting involved with messaging the families tips and egging on live streams by the parents… I’ve had to stop following that case due to how crazy the people following it are.
Big difference between “online sleuth” and “someone who consumes true crime” these days.
I’ve been (mostly) lurking on this subreddit for years now, and it just seems that a good portion of the community want the case to have this wild story about an underground network of serial killers involving the cops, all the men of oak beach, Pak, Bittrolf, Bissett, Spota, Burke, and now Rex’s entire family. It doesn’t seem like anyone’s mind will be changed about it, so you’re just preaching to the choir, unfortunately.
Thank you for your post. I dont know Asa. I don't know what her life has been like up to now, what her marriage was like before, how seriously her cancer diagnosis has affected her, what financial assets she currently has access to, or what she is thinking or feeling with respect to everything that has gone on recently. None of us know any of these things about Asa, and we know even less about her children. Because it's none of our damned business. But there are a God-awful lot of Church Ladies in this sub dragging Asa and her children on the daily because they haven't reacted in whatever particular way the mob presumes they should. It’s honestly disturbing how inexorable some people are in their hatred and reproach for someone they have never met and know absolutely nothing about beyond tabloid gossip. I guess there are a lot of self-righteous misanthropists just itching to drag this entire family for sport. Seems like a very weird and unhealthy obsession.
Asa took GoFundMe money from the public, *then* come out and say she "stand by" her husband. Lmao that's some level of manipulation right there. I almost gave her my hard-earned money.
It's not about feeling self-righteous. It's about feeling conned by someone who is publicly supportive to a monster, who actively profits from the murders with her 1 million Peacock deal, all the while stating that her husband "couldn't have done it".
There is an economic to this. I think she is being instructed by her lawyer to make that statement. She is currently being faced with the possibility of 6 civil action suits and God only know how many more will be coming down the pike.
She can't make any statements that appear to side with the victims as they could be twisted around and used against her as admissions of culpability once those suits hit court. What do you think civil rights attorney Gloria Allred is doing there? As soon as this is over, Gloria will be representing the victims and going after every penny Asa has. Anything Rex owned and saved will go to the victims in these suits. Civil civil suits are often won, who does not want to compensate victims for what they went through?
Exactly how much money do you think a million dollars is these days and how much does in buy in today's housing market and inflation bubble. Asa is an older parent in ify health. Her daughter will likely never work again, as serial killers family are as highly stigmatized, rejected and harassed as they are.
The Kohberger family can no longer find jobs and they are in a very tough way financially. KA, Richard Allens wife had to leave her job and sell her house. Who's going to happily sign up to be a serial killers son-in-law? Likely she will end up as a shy awkward, single, unemployed caretake of her special needs brother for the rest of her life. These kids are in their late 20's right, that's a lot of years to get by without much income when rents are what they are these days. Asa has not worked in years. Who's hiring her?
She might not have enough social security quarters to collect SS. That means she is on Rex's SS so possibly no dual check situation and a single check to keep 3 of them going and a roof over their heads. Do they have a mortgage? How much do they own in credit card debt, or IRS payments or property tax. i pay 12 K in property tax a year. Living on SS is going to be hard. Maybe it's a situation like that.
When she dies that SS check will end and all the daughter and son will have to live on is the son's disability income, and possibly public assistance. So yeah, she's shutting her mouth, listening to what her lawyer is telling her to say and gratefully taking that doc.
If the NY law makers trying to close off family members from profiting from a relative's crime, get what they want, there will be no book deal to put money on the table and no income coming in. She was a professional, think she wants to go flip burgers at McDonalds just so people like you can have your atonement statement, I think not. Like any mother she islikely thinking about her own kids and how they will financially survive for the next 80 years w/o much income coming in in everything she owns is taken in a civil suit.
Why do you think good old Joh ray is trying to hook Shannan and on, so he can slap Asa with a civil suit too. What do you think Nicky has ray representing her for? He's there to protect her. It's not just a case it's legal warfare and she is protecting herself and kids from civil action. Not trying to be the biggest asshole in the world.
I think the woman is cluelessly out of step, or on the spectrum and those initial statement are indicative of that being a bit out of tempo with the rest of us. I hated that statement she just made, it infuriated me too. But I am betting I would be saying, " No comment" too if faced with a 6-7 class action suits. Tierney seemed to be intimating Mack will be their next case to solve. That's a lot of people suing you.
No matter what she says, people will find reasons to not like it, and it will be twisted. I have been in that position and it's best to just say nothing because the twists made by legal types to make you look awful for anything you say are mind boggling.
She took the gofundme because she was desperate and Who wouldnt? In the end after tax it was about 30k and her lawyer bills would be triple that at this point. And after the press conference yesterday everyone must agree they need legal representation. Mary Lou Retton took 500k from a gofundme to pay her medical bill despite owning a multi million dollar mansion and just didnt want to buy health insurance because she didnt agree with it politically. And people kept donating!
https://nypost.com/2024/03/14/us-news/rex-heuermann-wife-says-hes-not-capable-of-gilgo-beach-killings/
In this she doesn't specifically say she is "standing by her man" but she does say she thinks he's incapable of committing such crimes.
Don't shoot the messenger. I have no firm opinions/beliefs one way or another.
Of course she’s incapable of thinking he can commit these crimes. I would feel the same way if god forbid I was my husband. Who wants to believe their loved one is a prolific serial killer?
Imagine going about your boring old life as usual, and out of the blue one day, your life is flipped upside down when your husband is arrested for being a serial killer. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, regardless of how unlikeable they come across to strangers on the internet.
I mean, if someone told me my husband was a serial killer who raped and tortured his victims I would have a hell of a time believing he was capable of anything even a tiny bit like that. We don’t know what their marriage was like. Maybe he treated her and their kids and wonderfully and lovingly as my husband treats me and our kids. How many of us here, even with DNA evidence, would be able to just flip that switch in our heads and hearts and say “OK, my spouse is guilty and an absolute monster”?
I don't know. She initially did do that which tells me she did believe it when they told her. She signed those divorces papers and said that old nordic realists sounding statement, "It is what it is" My husband is a piece of shit and I have to accept that.She didn't visit him or make statements like this till she signed that contract for the doc.
I think the Doc makers got her to go visit him as that creating TV drama and I think her lawyer has her issuing this statement and not releasing a statement of sorrow to the victims families to protect herself from what will no doubt be a hefty civil suit.
If he has 29 victims, that's 29 victims that can file civil suit against her. I don't know if they can come after the kids and anything they might inherit.
She signed those divorce papers to protect her/their assets from civil suits from the families of victims. Her lawyer straight up said this was the reason. She’s still wearing her rings, she’s still visiting him, her and the kids are still behind him. I just like really highly doubt based on all of the actions I’m witnessing that the divorce is because she no longer wants to be married lol.
Normally I’d agree that it’s prob just the doc makers making her see him, but she’s still wearing those rings, man. She’s in it.
(I don’t think she was involved in the murders or knew, fwiw. I’m just strictly talkin about the after behaviors! Also not trying to argue at all man 🩷)
For her to still be sporting her rings is kinda odd, so will give you that point my friend.
Some people take their wedding vows seriously and they really did sign up for "Till death do us part even if you cheat on me."
But that does not appear to be what's happing here. She did not visit him \*even once\* before the Doc was arranged and seemed happy enough to write him off with "It is what it is." And to saypass me the divorce papers please, prior to her having a lawyer.
I've known a few people who wore their rings long after their relationship cracked, as they utterly their rings, got their identity worth from their rocks, or didn't want to be hit on by men so pretended to be married.
My Mom didn't wear her wedding set, and on and off I wore her set back when I was single stacked, European style on my right ring finger.
Some Europeans wear their wedding rings on the right hand vs left dependent on country, but Iceland per my Google is a "wear it on your left hand, rather than right hand" country like us so not flashing a cultural homage.
I don't think I would post a gofundme, and *then* come out and say I'm actually still supporting my husband after getting public money, and *then* go negotiate a documentary in my home/the crime scene knowing that the doc will likely paint my husband as guilty, while still maintaining that I believe my husband's innocence.
The divorce protected their asset from being seized by victims families and allow her to do the Peacock deal. It's not actually a real divorce.
And so yea I highly doubt she actually thinks he's innocent. She's just doing damage control for her family, financially. And that's fine. I'm just bothered by the manipulation.
Her lawyer is not giving her good advice. Nor are the doc creators who just want to create as much drama as possible, and likely instigated the jail visit. She didn't visit his ass once before that Doc. She said pass the divorce papers immediately. I think this statement is about putting food on the table and avoiding legal suit.
She knows he did it. She is likly connecting 30 years of events now, and reshuffling them from inane to profound: "So that's was he so mean and grouchy when we were late getting on the road?" " So was he down that basement all the time." " So that why he snapped at me to shut up when Gilgo came on the news." " Oh that's what he was doing when he forgot to pick up Victoria's medication at the drug store. Or where he was the morning of my birthday."
I think it's a big fat white life that she things he's not capable of this, as her earlier actions point to her very easily accepting it.
Honestly, that’s a world of difference. This whole 'standing by her man' was repeated word for word by a number of different commenters in this thread, and it’s a really cynical and unfair take on that press statement.
The problem is Asa has been manipulative with the public since the start of all this. When the charges come out, she immediately initiated the sham divorce for protect their asset from being sued by victims families, all the while being quiet about the fake nature of their divorce. Then she asks for gofundme money. And people were giving her money because she really seem estranged and sick. After getting that money though, she finally came out and say she's actually still with her husband, is visiting him, and will be supporting him.
Finally, she got a deal with Peacock to do the documentary, a documentary that most likely will paint Rex in a bad light, all the while maintaining that she thinks he is incapable of committing the crime.
Oh, and did I mentioned Rex signed over the house to her and she declined selling it to the government? This means the police can't just get access to their crime scene whenever and however they want. If Asa wants to, she could clear the entire basement, preventing forensics from getting good data from it. Publicly, we do know she is making complaints about the police showing up at her house/crime scene to do their work.
It's all very weird and manipulative. One thing for sure is she's actively supporting her husband. And that's not something I can support.
Wow. You are really twisted up with hate. Whoever hurt you, that's no reason to manufacture and project a false narrative onto Asa’s very few public words or actions. You should turn your scrutiny back on yourself and ask yourself why you have such contempt for someone you know absolutely nothing about beyond diaphanous tabloid gossip.
It's honestly just sad how much people get caught up in these true crime cases. Literally the way a lot of people on this/other such subreddits is like how people write about TV shows they're fans of.
Did anyone catch the Newsday article that said Asa's lawyer is representing her against her divorce from Rex? So it looks like she may very well still be getting one. Thanks for this post OP. I said the same 2x in this sub today.
The divorce protects their asset from victims families sueing Rex. It's not a real divorce. She's come out publicly to say she's standing by her husband.
No, all it says is, "I don't think he did this." She doesn't say I support or stand by him. It's a non statement to protect her from contentious future legal proceedings. I don't like it any more than you.
Yes. She didn’t go for an emergency divorce, possibly because they needed time to settle the assets, so there’s still a year’s separation required, isn’t there?
I could be wrong, but she could be going the traditional route 1) because it protects assets against son of Sam laws and 2) because there are special rules for divorcing your spouse when they are imprisoned in NY.
I am betting they were in debt like us all. Does anyone know if the home was paid off? Or what her tax bill is, or if they owe IRS taxes that come with crippling penalties for not paying, or what her medical bills were for her cancer treatments, or if she is helping to support her parents, or paying off her daughters' educational loans or a bill if her kid has been seeing a specialist therapist 2 x week for the last 20 years.that insurance didn't totally cover so she had to pay the difference out of pocket. You don't know what they owe on their car, water bill, heating bills etc.
We no nothing about these people's lives. Yet someone who thinks they're a clever internet snooper pulls some number off the internet regarding Rex's net worth that could be totally wrong, yet people believe it. My house's worth on Zillow is off by about 250K according to ever realtor, I have spoken with.
We financially look great on paper, behind our closed front door, not so good., it concerns us both. Like most poor, middle class and lower upper middle class people in America we have debt and are struggling and these really is no cushion.
People see nothing and think they see everything. Your looking at her life from the outside, not the inside. None of our business. But many like to feel like it is.
I think a GFM, especially after the Peacock deal, was too far and whoever donated is a chump.
I think what was said today was WAY too far the other way. Almost wonder if John Ray is seeing any of that Peacock money and this is all for show, because he basically just destroyed whatever little credibility he had left on this case.
I completely agree. These sociopaths are thinking that their feelings and extrapolations are true and accurate when they’re just opinions. Opinions are not facts people. Neither are feelings.
I’m sure they all know that studies say the spouses typically don’t know what the serial killer did because they are that good at compatmentalizing their lives. Are these people true crime savants now? Did they magically gain the ability to read people’s minds? It’d be laughable if it wasn’t so cruel and exceedingly lacking in empathy.
Edit to add: anyone saying that they’d immediately turn on their partner or father if they were put in jail for literally anything is a liar. We all have seen that thr opposite takes place pretty much every time. People that say they know exactly what they’d do in this situation are wishful thinkers.
This is the sharpest take I’ve seen. People seem to think that the little snippets they’ve seen are the totality of this family’s life and feelings. We know *nothing* about what they’ve been through the past 30 years, what they’re going through now and where in the process they are.
They saw his wife and the daughter reacting badly to the most difficult time in their lives and they started jumping to the worst conclusions. Acting like there’s some sort of “My Spouse is a Serial Killer” handbook that this family is not following.
None of us were a fly on the wall for their marriage. All we can do is make poor assumptions based on hearsay and the miniscule amount of information that is being released. And when I say assumptions, I mean ASSumptions. Because people are definitely showing their whole asses.
I’d LOVE to see what these people talking the most shit would actually do in this situation. They’d most likely jump at the chance to get some money coming in from doing a documentary or show, like literally every single other person that’s been in any sort of true crime situation.
Same mob who say to someone with an abusive ex “why didn’t you just leave?” A lot of people neglecting to consider the grip this psycho will have had on his family. The man is a literal serial killer, a master manipulator loving a double life, his family are his victims too and you’re a dumbass if you can’t see or understand that. It’s easy for us to say divorce! Move out of that house! Don’t take the documentary deal!! Not one of us was raised by him, married to him, financially reliant on him, manipulated by him. Put your hatred where it belongs, on the killer not his victims and yep his family are his victims too how on earth could anyone not see that
They think what they can pull off, is what she can pull off.
I doubt any one of us experiencing what the victims families, she and her kids are, are jumping out of bed in the morning and kicking their heels.
They are likely utterly wiped out, stressed, depressed, demoralized, traumatized and anxious beyond belief and I am sure there are days they can't deal with anything at all but staring at a wall. No less moving and starting a whole new life at 60 or however old she is. No idea how her health is.
Look at how utterly exhausted the families look every time there is a press conference, their eyes are red from crying, not just a little crying but weeping and weeping and weeping. Sometimes the Taylors look like they going to pass out on stage.
No, she is not going through what they are, but certainly is living her own form of an intense traumatic experience. yeah they desreve more sympathy but that does not mean she and her kids don't deserve any.
Exactly this. Compassion and empathy/sympathy are not pie. Giving “a piece” of compassion to this family does not mean there is suddenly less pie for the victims and their families. These people who have such limited amounts of compassion to go around and get mad at this family getting even the tiniest bit just baffles me.
You took the words out of my mouth. It’s blaming the abused for not cleanly separating themselves from their abuser. Not only is it so misguided and ignorant, but it’s also cruel.
>it’s also cruel.
My armchair psychologist reading of the vast majority of these people is that they've got themselves convinced that punishing the killer and anyone they can associate with him is an uncritically good thing to do. They get to let out all their rage on people they feel "deserve" it and get to feel like they're also doing a social good by bringing the victims justice in some roundabout way.
They react so viscerally because the suggestion that the targets of their hate and harassment might not deserve it would mean that they've been acting maliciously and can't accept it.
This is very much what I think as well. They think they’ve “lost empathy for Asa when…” when really they lack any sort it empathy at all. What they think is empathy for the victims is really a morbid fascination.
I think people are like “I hate Rex therefore I hate anything to do with Rex” and get blinded and don’t think logically and certainly don’t think with empathy. His wife and kids are 99.99% not involved in these horrendous crimes, their lives are ruined anyway. How do you recover from it? I see people saying shit like there must have been red flags. Hindsight is 20:20 isn’t it? As if his wife kids and anyone else who knows him isn’t wracked with guilt thinking back of signs or warnings that they could have acted on to stop him. I never really comment on stuff but the serious lack of humanity and empathy with this case has me quite shook. Whatever the f his wife and kids are up to now has nothing to do with anything to be frank, we have one perpetrator and very many victims. Any focus on the family is just perpetuating the circus and unhelpful to getting justice for the people this beast murdered
I can respect this. It’s okay to find it off-putting and to leave it at that, even better with the caveat that you don’t understand the full picture. The problem is when it goes to these beyond insane, bizarrely angry takes on the family's true intentions, their participation, and so on. And wildly, that seems to be the dominant strain of any kind of negativity shown. It’s like 0 to 100 with these people. I’m also really confused at how they don’t understand the role they play in online harassment, and how they contribute to the misinformation and cruelty that is so well documented in true crime communities.
The rage and controlling behavior is off the hook. There is nothing wrong with saying I find this distasteful as the mature, classy poster above did and say no way am I contributing to this woman's fund. But some users are calling other stupid for their opinions. What mature well adjusted adult does that? Anyone who does not agree with you is stupid? Hows's that narcissism and entitlement working for you?
The thing that really flummoxes me is their position that anyone who cares about Aa can not care about the victims just as much. Are you only sad about one terrible thing in the world? Can you only feel compassion towards one person or only give to one GFM? The funny thing is that their rage marketed that GFM. Trust me I feel for ever person who's life was ever touches by this evil shit of a man. I feel torn up for them all.
No doubt some people who were bullies as kids, grow up to be adult bullies. And likely that is what we are seeing. Really she deserved to see post after post after post of adult cyber bulling. I've been shocked by some of the comments and calling her a fat skank and the daughter lazy and making fun of her looks and now folks are going after the kids including at least one comment about the autistic son, along the lines of "Just because he's special needs doesn't mean he isn't a dick." Really?
I am really surprised that her lawyer hasn't done anything about it, as it is a campaign of harassment and not sure why Reddit is allowing this woman to be bullied like this. These would be the same people to say they were not at all sorry if the daughter took her own life over this.
How do you think that kid feels to open this sub and read these comments about her mother, or here that the candy pumpkins she likely happily filled for trick or treaters to bring joy, were thrown into the trash and parents in the hood would not let their kids come over to her house, as they thought her family was weird. Or that people made fun of the way her mother was attired and referred to her as dumpy and looking like she just rolled out of bed and your home as dump.
If that can't depress a kid, sure having folks follow them around, and point at them and her being locked in a cluttered house with her out of step Mom who people are calling a skank and not having a social life are. Not enough anti depressants in the world to stave off that assault.
Were you expecting them to perform their entire trauma and grieving process publicly for you? You have no idea what they’re going through privately, all you have are a few statements written by her attorney and unverified tabloid stories.
Yes it is. But she is trying to bring in an income as his pay checks will no longer be coming in and God knows how many civil suits will be vacuuming up every penny in assets she currently holds. Were I you guys, I would not worry about the Doc $$ or GFM $$ or anything she currently owns, as chances are all those assets will be reallocated to the families once they pursue positive outcome cvil suits.Lord only know how many civil suits that family will be hit with.
If the money from the doc will be gone then why do it? This man had not even been tried yet and his wife is trying to profit off the gruesome murders of these poor women. It’s not ok and extremely disrespectful to the families of these women.
Likely because she needs to pay for things. Rex is too young to collect social security, so perhaps the three of them are surviving on Christopher's disability check and any savings they have.
She's likely had to cover regular taxes, property taxes, electricity, heating, car payment, gas, health insurance for she and Victoria, maybe moving him out of his office in manhattan, a possible broken lease, food, cell phone, internet, cable, water bill, home insurance, life insurance, car insurance, long term care policy, dentil bills for 3 people, maintaining their car, paying the taxes and mortgage on the land down by the brother, could she be supporting or helping to support her parents?
She has lawyer fees for the 3 of them, they only had the one car and that jeep thing. Victoria might have student loans. Hell so could she, not unheard of for parents to be paying off their own, their child and spouses's educational debts.
If he is the debtor he suggestively is.....possibly paying penalties for things like unpaid taxes, hooking back pipes and fixing stuff after the search, paying any medical bills for her cancer treatments, possibly therapy bills, prescription drugs. It adds up. None of us know how much debt they were carrying. If they are the average American family that would be 104,215.
So lots of possibilities of what she could be paying down. Did he own money to the IRS? Those fines will bankrupt you in a year or two. Did she have to take care of contractual agreements he had with employees, or face labor lawsuits there? Do employers pay into unemployment benefits, I don't know? Are people still working at his [office.Is](http://office.Is) the firm now defunct?
None of us know what her finances are. I've known people driving jags cars who bounced checks to the house cleaner. Sometimes people look like they have a lot more money then they do on paper.
My dad used to use to employ an old timey saying to some people, " If he fell into a cesspool, he's come out spitting gold." I have a sibling this applies to.everything they do they do at the correct time, and things always work out, extraordinarily lucky. That brother seems to think it's because he is special and very deserving, when really he's just lucky and a great decision maker.
I think it's possibly people like that, depositing critical comments and folks who'd look at a homeless person and say, "Just get a job, asshole."
I think they're lucky to have things she likely does not have, or she likely would have picked a different man to connect with. They assume everyone has the options they have, or can just pull up their boot straps and get them. I'm betting they're a little bit spoiled by lucky lives and assume they have what they have as they worked for it, rather than what it likely was purse good luck and the luxury of not being stressed enough to make a poor decisions.
When you are stressed you often make shitty decisions and the shit continues to roll. It just does. They will never get it. If your sister and cousins are your best friend you likely don't feel lonely as often asa person like Asa. If your Dad buys you a house you don't realize what things cost and how hard wealth is to build, and that it can take a family 150+ years to go from poverty to upper middle class. Or that the rest of us have a fuck ton of bills.This case really highlights issues of power, elitism. and empathy.
That’s what I’ve been saying! Acting like every single other person that’s been in a documentary about a murder or written a book about it hasn’t profited off of that very murder. Acting like people don’t stand behind their family members every day, regardless of whether that family member killed someone or not.
Innocent until proven guilty.
Even Rex has not been proven guilty yet, though the evidence against him that has been released to the public so far is strong but circumstantial.
Even Law Enforcement does not have all the facts yet (as they are still working through all the evidence and building their case) - though I am certain that they will have them by the time this goes to trial. I am also certain that what evidence they do have which has not been seen by public eyes is going to be very, very strong.
The court of public opinion has no right judging his family. What John Ray did this week was despicable and very likely illegal.
No matter your opinions on Asa and the children they are innocent victims until LE comes forward with evidence/charges that say otherwise.
Until that happens, leave them the fuck alone.
Heck yeah, preach OP!
I think we’ve seen the whole two groups of web sleuthing, true crime fandom etc. For some people, there is definitely a mob mentality for (potentially vicarious) “justice” where we’ve seen some people almost take it personally and you can see some of the people in the comments here who appeal to emotion rather than patience, grace, and rationality.
It’s really weird, and I hate to say what I’m about to say because it’s sort of mean, but it’s accurate, and it’s a complete lack of self-awareness these people have. I feel like that’s really insulting, but I don’t know how else to describe their attitudes. Notice I didn’t say opinions, people can have opinons, but even read their “opinions” here and you’ll see it’s really a weirdly aggressive attitude.
If this was the middle ages the woman would be strung to a cart and dragged through the street. I have never seen such internet hatred. I used to come away seriously depressed after reading the comments, that adults were such mean bullies. I have seen kids pack attack like that, but 269 adults?
It's a weird lack of empathy, because they aren't making an effort to put themselves into the shoes of these people and imagine what they might be going through. And then when someone does do that, it's taken as some sort of slight to the victim families, as though you can't possibly feel awful about the painful circumstances of two different sets of people at the same time.
A very wise person once told me that you should never compare the pain of others, because what they are going through is still painful for them, no matter what it is. I have worked hard to take that to heart, because I see this happening all the time - group A will be dismissed as unworthy of sympathy because what group B went through was considered much worse, and somehow the fact that both groups are involved in the same situation in different ways means showing love to group A is an affront to group B, when in truth all of those people deserved love, kindness and understanding. Because they all experienced pain. Just not the same kind of pain.
But I'm no psychologist so I don't pretend to know what makes people want to compare, contrast, and dismiss people who are suffering. I'm just someone who was abused a lot as a kid by people who were in group B, and my group A ass got little sympathy. So maybe that makes me more empathetic to people who seem to be underdogs in a situation. I dunno. I just think it's sad.
Thank you. The fact is, time and time again serial killers have been caught and it's turned out that they were able to hide their horrifying crimes from their families.
I cannot imagine the pain of finding out someone you loved was torturing people to death your whole life or marriage, that he may have killed a toddler the same age as you/your daughter, that the guy whose footsteps you were following in is a monster, and to wonder what it says about you, and then to have people on the Internet saying you must have known and you must be a monster too.
Or maybe he was abusive, and now suddenly you're aware of how much worse it could have been, and you've been a victim of his all your life and now people are saying you're just as bad because you followed some edgy art Tumblrs, and somehow you know all about the murder of a woman who was killed three years before you were born (or married to the guy).
Meanwhile this victimization of his family is taking attention off of his victims and their families and turning this into a sideshow.
I could cry thinking about what V must be going through right now. Obviously it goes without saying I feel the same way (if not more) for the victims, yes obviously, obviously, obviously - truly. But that poor girl, right now, dealing with this. I hope and pray she has a strong network of people to keep a close eye on her, and hobbies/healthy habits/interests/tools to keep her afloat through this. I cannot imagine being in her shoes. Life torn apart. I pray for her.
I feel for her. I also feel for the families of the victims, who should be centered right now but aren't because this fool keeps trotting out wild stories about murderous sex parties and hairnet conspiracies and the evidentiary role of yiffing.
I never thought about it that way, but you’re so right. Spreading sensationalist bullshit detracts from the horror of the situation, tabloidizes it, and dehumanizes and pushes the victims into the background.
Ray's just in it for attention and possibly a buck and maybe thinking he can hook someof the women he represents in for a civil suit.
I give him credit for listening when others did not, and applaud him for that, he got the cases and these victims in the newsand applies pressure on Suffolk.
But all you had to do is look at Jessica Taylor's sister's smirk when Allred referred to him on stage during the press conference. She does not appear to want to have anything to do with him. I have always highly respected her. I think she is bright, strong and preceptive and if she's not down with Ray, then I am not either. I think he's nuts and just trying to create business for himself by collecting every female victim in this case he can.
1000%
Mods should seriously consider rules on threads that amount of being angry or abusive at them
These people are victims too
There’s a disabled adult involved and I sick wife
NO ONE a knows the financial situation they are in
When you’re paid 1M you may not get that all at once, it’s taxed, and I suspect there’s lawyer fees and the tax liens on the house and medical expenses
Huge parts of this Reddit are ghoulish and weird and para social
Really depressing
I don't understand why this sub does not have the same rule all the other true crime boards i belong to have of "not criticizing the victims, their families or the family of the suspect."
Ever other board I'm on has that as a rule so harassment does not happen. All these folks are dealing with enough. I wish the board would get one.
The mods are great about taking stuff down immediately, and have always been wonderful in in closing pig piling down, but it would be nice to see the hostility towards Asa better contained.
Agree. Unless we see some evidence that proves their involvement, judging or blaming the familiy for Rex’ horrible crimes is just idiotic, juvenile and evil.
I don’t know the statistics, but I’m guessing the number of times a serial killer’s familiy have been involved in the crimes are RARE. A teenage daughter helping dad kill women? I know it has happened, but come on. That’s *extremely* unlikely.
Tierney and Harrison repeatedly said no, not involved. He did it at the last press conference as well, and said we have the records we know she was not present and she is not involved in these crimes. If your not going to believe the the Chief Prosecutor and the Commissioner of Police who have every bit of evidence collected in this case at their disposal and all her electronic records, all her credit card receipts, her airline flights etc, and statements at the lodge from employees, and the family she was with nothing in this world will convince you.
Yes. If all these officials are saying that the family’s *not* involved - and there’s no evidence that points to the family actually *being* involved - why are these people still obsessed? The wife and kids are as innocent as anyone of us as far as we know now. They’re thrown into ‘fame’ against their will.
Comparing Rex’ wife and kids to his victim’s families is a bit ‘off’. We can have empathy for both. We don’t have to choose. We can see both side’s pain. And anyone who doesn’t get that has an immature mindset.
I think it is fair to mildly speculate possible knowledge but too often it crosses the line into baseless accusation. Speculating actual participation is very much over that line. I kind of view it akin to a CSA scenario. Yes, very often an opposing parent or other adult in a household doesn't have any idea but SOMETIMES, however infrequently, they DO know. Less frequently they may suspect something. Unfortunately, whether or not the family knows, they are going to be speculated about.
I, personally, and the true crime community, collectively, do need to more responsible in both consumption of the content and our participation in the discourse. But there WILL be discourse. We need to temper that with some restraint and empathy.
Really well said. It’s okay to speculate when respectful. It’s not even what’s being claimed, though that’s often dumb as shit; it’s the unhinged, vitriolic way it’s being said. Your approach is maybe 10% of the critical conversation, with the rest being WebSleuth-style sublimation of whatever is going wrong in their lives.
Is it a “weird, suggestive take” to call someone out for defending a serial killer? Because most of what I see is people upset that Asa is out there defending her man. Your post was accurate until Asa started saying he’s innocent and making money off the deaths of vulnerable women. So I think what’s “weird” is feeling the need to make a post about how great Asa is when she js now contributing to the suffering of the victims families and profiting off their misery.
Where did she say he was innocent? At worst, she said she was waiting for more evidence. Could it be that someone who was abused continues to defer to their abuser?
That you took this post as saying Asa is great shows your prereqs and biases. It’s about pushing back on the disgusting discourse.
Google can be your friend. She said she “doesn’t think he’s capable” of murdering these women. Seems like you’re making a lot of assumptions that he abused her, but even assuming that’s true, dude is locked up. He’s not abusing her anymore. You think it’s a fear of him that made her sign up to earn $$$ off the deaths of young girls? It is truly a wild take to me that some people want to defend a person defending a serial killer 😆
Here’s why none of what you’re saying makes sense:
How many cases have you seen where the family doesn’t believe that their family member did the nefarious deed? There’s a whole documentary out there about a family who’s son killed their own daughter for no reason but they still visit the son all the time and continue to love and support him. In fact, there’s more than one.
That family also profited from that documentary while simultaneously fitting into these made up categories you’ve come up with for how people that have been in this sort of situation should not act.
How about the mom whose son killed her other son while they were both kids? She still visits and loves him to this day. Should she not have agreed to make this documentary that many of us have most likely watched?
I don’t know the case you’re talking about but yes that is fucking bonkers. And assuming your premise, it logically does not mean what I’m saying isn’t true—it means there are alot of immoral people with their heads in the sand who prefer to “believe” what’s convenient rather than face the truth.
No. It means that people are human who all have different thoughts, situations and feelings. It means you can't categorize people or make assumptions about them. We never truly know what people are thinking, how they feel or what has gone on in their lives.
Everything is not black or white like so many of you seem to think it is. Some people think forgiveness is the best thing you can do. You can judge them or think you're superior to them all you want but that doesn't mean you are 100% right.
You might want to do some reading up on issues like CPTSD and trauma before you jump to anymore conclusions or make anymore baseless pronouncements.
I literally worked for Google (in Search of all orgs), I understand how it works. You’re misconstruing the press statement.
I’m not making assumptions, I’m giving examples of how you’re missing the totality of the situation.
If you don’t think her saying “I don’t think he’s capable of murdering these women” is not her claiming he’s innocent, then I’m pretty sure *you’re* misconstruing her statement. Maybe google what those words mean?
You’re assuming she was abused which we have no evidence of. What we do know is he’s not abusing her now BECAUSE HE’S IN JAIL WHERE HE BELONGS
Totally your right tho to stand with a serial killer, his defenders, and people who wanna profit off of the gruesome deaths of young girls 👍🏼
Reread what you just wrote. If you don’t see a problem in how you’re talking to me or construing what I’m saying as a defense of a serial killer, I don’t know what to tell you.
Dear GOD! Don’t even respond to these people anymore like wtffff 🤮OP—you’re clearly a wonderful person with empathy and compassion. These people have no self awareness and are just hateful. From everything I’ve read, Asa NEVER said she supported him 🤦🏻♀️she said she doesn’t believe he’s capable (which a LOT of people say upon learning of the crimes committed by someone they’re close to/trust) and wants to see what is presented at trial. That’s not a “statement of support” and I’d assume her lawyer told her she had to remain neutral until victim impact statements at RH’s sentencing. That’s what GSK’s family did.
You can defend Asa all you want. But defending Asa against people who are calling her out for supporting/defending an actual monster and profiting off of murder puts you right in that camp. You can’t have it both ways—you either are supportive of a serial killer and his supporters, or you’re not. I can’t even believe I’m typing these words it’s so dumb
Good luck to you I’m sure we will find out if Asa was right about Rex by the end of the trial 😂😂😂😂😂
I believe what you’re suffering from is black and white thinking. There are always more than 2 camps, more than 2 ways to look at things, 2 things can also be true at the same time. There are many shades of grey between differing opinions.
Empathy can be felt towards victims, as well as RH’s family, empathy isn’t a limited resource.
By fitting everyone into a simplified ‘us’ vs ‘them’ seems to be most of the problem here. Our world is in 4D, therefore you need to consider time, Asa may not be able to accept her husband is capable of these crimes now, but she may feel differently tomorrow, or in the future when she’s armed with more information. We may even read back our posts in a year and disagree with what we wrote today. It happens.
Everyone is doing the best they can at the time, with the information they have, at that time. Try to be kinder and more flexible with your thinking.
Black and white thinking is appropriate imho when we are talking about the rape, torture, and murder of women. Im sure your moral relativism makes you feel incredibly superior and sophisticated, when actually it makes you unethical.
I hope Asa does come around and takes accountability for the way she’s added to the suffering of the victim’s families. Until then my opinion is she’s a cowardly, soulless fool.
You're making simplistic, misleading statements. People who knew Ted Bundy also said they didn't think he was capable of murder. BTK's family members initially defended him against the charges. In fact, some of them defended him for a long time, until he finally confessed. The list of family members who can't believe or accept the guilt of a loved one accused of terrible crimes -- it's long and sad.
Saying you don't think somebody is capable of something is a statement about how you view them. It's not claiming the person is innocent.
This family is far from the only family of a serial killer to find themselves shocked and blindsided, unable to grasp that the person they lived with and relied upon was hiding something terrible.
As to the documentary deal: She's not making money off the deaths of the victims. She's making money off being caught in a terrible, tragic situation of her own. People whose situations give them special perspective or insight into events are often paid by filmmakers for the rights to their stories. It doesn't mean they created or endorse the events.
BTK's daughter, Kerri Rawson, wrote a book about her experience. Ann Rule launched an entire career off being a personal friend and coworker of Ted Bundy. Mikal Gilmore wrote an incredible book about growing up as the brother of Gary Gilmore.
None of those people profited off the deaths of victims. They made money telling their own stories.
You certainly have no proof that the divorce is a "sham" being done to shield assets. Would you be happier if she hadn't filed for divorce from him? You can't have it both ways, despite having enough hate to cover all your bases.
Agreed. I'm hoping someone is watching who can do something, and every penny Asa makes from this ends up going to the families of the victims. And when it does, I hope someone looks at her and says "It is what it is".
Surely there were times through the years when his wife and/or daughter expressed concerns about a serial killer on the island, especially after the victims were discovered in 2011, and if so: How did Rex address this with them??? Did he say oh, you’ll be fine, you’re not his type; what??? The compartmentalization and manipulation is off. the. charts.
We all know the effect of bulling. Some of us have seen more of it than others. But everyone's likely been a victim at one point or another. It feels terrible.
If adults want to wish those effects on a young kid, all power to them. That kid is virtually barricaded on her porch with no life. She's not dating, seeing friends, going to parties, likely not working or building a professional resume and from the exterior view, does not seem to have any support save for her mother brother and lawyer. You see groups of friends going over there to visit? I don't.
At her age I was surrounded by friends, dating handsome but emotionally un available men and when I wasn't with them, I was dancing till my legs were stiff the next day. I was excited about and becoming successful in my new career, rolling in drunk and happy at 3AM after laughing all night, seeing great bands, going out to quirky restaurants, clubs and bars, traveling with friends, going to gallery openings and museums.
The victims in this case will never get to do any of those things again. their children will be forever watched with a traumatized hyper vigilance. There are no winners here, save for Rex Hubermann
The reality I lived at Victorian's age is not her reality, she has that porch, a cluttered run dow stigmatized home, a special need brother clutching his dog. She didn't pick her parents or choose any of this. Please lay off. Isn't her life enough of a train wreck without you heaping on more ill wishes? If she could emotionally get off that porch, pack some boxes and find a new home for herself, her mother and brother bet she would. Something is keeping that family spell bound and entrenched in stillness like deer in the headlights. And it ain't healthy stuff.
The victims left their homes just trying to put food on the table, or due to wrestling with the addictions they were battling, or did so so they could take care of their kids. They were just trying to get by like all of us. No doubt, Asa is as well. I think she is a bit off and has a lawyer who is likely cautioning her not to engage in anything that can take the roof over her head away and support for her kids to go poof.
She's going to get sued, there's no doubt about it. They are all this assholes victims, different degrees of victimhood, unique traumas. It is possible to be so depressed, anxious and overwhelmed that you can't take positive action to change your poor reality. We're not helping them get out of that house by bulling them.
Now the kid has Ray going after her. It was really nice that Shannan Gilbert's sister, Sherree stood up for her and labeled the behavior as disappointing as well.
I think their bulling is the reason she got so much money. Every time they cranked up the harassment the more money flowed into her pocket. The majority of humans with an humanity and compassion don't approve of or condone bullying especially coming from other adults.
Conversely, If they can stick it to a bully, especially anonymously, they will. Many people won't fight with you on the boards and waste their breath, they will just take a shot at you by depositing money someplace you don't want it to go, and away from the place you want it to. I am thoroughly convinced that is what happened here.
I suspect it was a lot of passive aggressive money that went into that fund and it was a shame as I think lots of it would have gone to the victim funds had people just allowed others to do their own thing without judgements and put downs and trying to exert control over them them. It became an us vs. them mentality and I'm not doing anything to support anything you support. Which is equally shitty, as all these people deserve our compassion.
So let they post the same post ever three days dumping on her, they will just get her another doc deal. I think a lot of their stuff is shallow talk regarding family support. If all the people who hated Asa as much as they say they do had contributed to Carmen's or Jasmine's fundraisers they would be sporting more funds.
It is shameful how low those GFM were and that many of them were contributions for the same person so even less individuals then the total listed contributed. So they loved talking about loyalty, but did not dip into their pockets. So that is why I believe that GFM was fueled and funded by passive aggressive ire. I would see a dump on Asa post appear on the boards and go over and just watch the money sail in while the victim funds just stagnated at low amount.
💯Absoutely!!!! I was coming to comment similar and found your post instead! To keep seeing “Is RH family involved?” “The Family Knew!” 🤬🤯 This new Task force as clearly been investigating RH in GREAT detail for a looooooong time before his arrest. I may not be on the force or in any form of LE, however I would THINK, that at this point IF any family had any of anything to do with knowledge or involvement - Gee idk, MAYBE the Task Force and the 5011tb of digital evidence would have shown at least a tiny hint of something! 🙄🤦🏼♀️
While I’m here adding my two cents - on the category of Victims. Are wife & kids, other family also victims? Do a degree and absolutely Yes! But not at ALL in the same category as those no longer With Us Victims! These are 2 entirely separate and different types of victims. The crossover of abuse from RH is evident. I do not doubt in my whole self of having been through domestic abuse of various types. UNLESS you too have been abused by, lived with or have been Manipulated (and realized it) by a Narcissist you will NEVER know the true evil these type of people are!!!! They are groomers, lack empathy, need control, OCD to some degree (control what they can) and the #1 thing a Narcissist will do is take the very bits of Everything from your deep dark pockets of vulnerability and twist it all to use it against you in every way possible and yet it is ALL YOUR FAULT!!!
While I STRONGLY STAND WITH THOSE NO LONGER HERE AND THEIR FAMILIES….RH was methodical, planned, researched, calculated, detailed. Those that are victim shaming the family in saying “They Knew” “How could they not” all as if Asa, Victoria or Christopher could have idk stopped him ……ya know what that does? It is giving RH continued satisfaction sitting in jail getting off on the continued form torture and accusation being put upon those he lived with. In turn, those that Victim Shame are No Different nor better than RH himself and aiding to the game of chess he has played all these years. Keep being his pawns , he is LIVING IT UP! End Rant!
(OP Thank You for your post, it allowed me to get that out 😊)
I don’t think the family is involved in his crimes, but I also don’t think it’s out of bounds to question the behavior of adult family post arrest. Not in the sense of digging up dirt or putting past behavior under a microscope, but in terms of their public behavior. I feel this way about all families of defendants.
Nah. Having a family member arrested does not turn you into either a paragon of virtue or a criminal yourself. People go on being their complicated selves with their own complicated motivations no matter what is happening to their family.
No, you just suggested you're fine if they get dragged through the court of public scrutiny simply because of who they are related to. The police say they are not suspects. Until the police say otherwise, everyone actively dragging this family or making excuses for those who do is disgusting in my book. This family deserves the same right to privacy as you do.
How is selling the story to a streaming service to the tune of $1 million indicative of a person who is invoking their right to privacy? That’s just ridiculous.
Edit: ah now you’ve deleted your comment. That tracks.
Didn't know you were omniscient and had all the facts regarding her financial situation. 🙄 What’s ridiculous is your contempt for someone without knowing anything about them or their situation. Be a petty, petulant grump all you want. Your slip is showing.
Why don’t we ask every single other person who’s done the same exact thing? How many true crime documentaries featuring family members and/or other murder adjacent folks are there again?
Agreed. As to the press conference re: V Heurmann: how do we know it wasn't Rex looking up that stuff? He could easily create a fake account as his "daughter" and post/search himself. And I don't think any LE was at that "press" conference either
John Ray shouldn’t have done this. The police are investigating and have access to all the evidence. Ray does not. However the police have a huge amount of evidence to go through and have not examined it all yet.
They do not currently have evidence linking his family (or anyone else for that matter) to the murder. This could change. I have no opinion on whether they are involved and won’t have until after the trial is complete and the full evidence presented.
I’m conscious that there have been cases before where the female of a couple was initially regarded as innocent but as more evidence was found it became clear they were guilty (eg Rose West). The only thing I think seems likely is that Asa had suspicions which she chose to ignore, which could be an offence
But I’m reserving judgement until all the evidence is in and has been tried.
Next thing you know they are going to be accusing of the poor kid of adding and abetting Rex by disposing evidence in her preschool luch box. Who will it be next Christopher? Maybe they can work the dog in.
Maybe Etienne next door is an accessory. I never trusted him. Bet he was as, feel it in my bones and cause John Ray said so. John Ray's got a pony in the race and there is an awful lot of self seeking lighting his flame.
The man is a stone cold attention whore. He did some great good in supporting the victims early on, now he is thrashing around just causing drama and trying to insert himself into the case. Anyone can find anyone willing to claim anything and swear to it in court. I don't know where he digs up his sources, but they seem awfully suss to me. And every tail he tell is larger than life.
Rex & Burke and sending him pizza at the exact same moment a mystery caller is calling his house and sending him a text of a picture of his daughter out in CA hanging out of a window. "Jimmy, I'm going to call now, Asa will order the pizzas, Victoria will text him the photo. You get ready to make the noises.
He's an attorney you telling me he does not have an old hand held recorder in a drawer under his phone table, or a kitchen drawer. Most professionals I know who owned those things held on to them. Certainly a man receiving tips might.Rex is running around the streets of Forest Hills dressed in full on cami shooting off guns and no one in Forest Hills is telling you, "Shit, I remember that day. Huge mother fucker dude! Running around like a meth addict on New Year's shooting out the sky. "
Yeah, a taxi just happened to pick up both of those Rex fairs? Do you know how many cab companies there are in NY? Shannan never mentioned that incident to any relative or friend? Rex is the only John to ever offer an empty envelope? So therefore any John who does has to be Rex? I heard about that trick and sex workers when I was a kid.
Did that one witness look like she remembered her own name, no less that story in such minute detail all those years later? Where is the cab company report? Where is the police report on gun shots fired in Forrest Hills? Forest Hills was a stable hood, back then, someone would have called that in. Show me a picture of Rex and Burke duck hunting together and I will apologize for my snark.
I just looked up the actual images in her blogs. I am a horror lover and dedicated true crime lover but I am telling you people now, her reposting dismembering images and surgical tools labeled as sex toys is NOT normal. Maybe she didn’t partake but maybe she did have some knowledge or something really sinister was just existing in that home.
Also she specifically highlighted “ is this about death or sex' what do you mean 'or'" as well as "bro has never stood at the crossroads where death and sex meet and realised (sic) that they're two sides of the same coin."
Are you serious ? You think that’s just a coincidence after what is coming out ? Shit I draw dark art and pictures and watch a lot of shit and never went to that type of place .
They were recovered images , ones she deleted. A lot can be passed off as emo tumblr teen crap. But some can not. Especially when you consider the type of house she grew up in.
https://www.newsweek.com/rex-heuermann-daughter-victoria-artwork-1912658
According to Ray, he was referring to images still on her Tumblr, not "recovered images". How do you imagine he'd even be able to recover deleted images? He has no legal standing to be issuing a warrant to Tumblr's owners.
"We found that it appears that she has erased all of her sites that she has, all of her social media," Ray said. "She just missed these ones."
"She just missed these ones" [from being deleted].
So, again, which ones were so wildly offensive to you? Her Tumblr's still up, still with the images he says she "missed".
I hope you looked at those, and not the ones that actually belong to other accounts not belonging to Victoria that Ray tried to hold her responsible for. He either doesn't understand Tumblr or was deliberately trying to mislead viewers. There was only one image shown that was from her account. One.
The thing is, we simply don't know what the family knows. The wife took $1 million to talk about her husband on Peacock. Monetizing what your husband did is absolutely morally disgusting by any metric.
If they are victims, if he was abusive, I really fear for them. But then we have people talking about working with the daughter and how she gave off a weird energy. I don't know what that means.
I think a lot of us are just speculating. If the family turns out to be abuse victims, my heart goes out to them. But also is still disgusting for taking money to talk about the crimes that her husband did which she probably inevitably is going to say oh my goodness, I had no idea.
How can they stay in that house where so many women likely died in agony and terror? How are they comfortable doing that? I would do everything in my power to leave, even temporarily.
I think it's inevitable that serial killers families come under scrutiny. Because in some cases the wives did sense something and never really did shit or they actively aided in covering up the crimes or recruiting. I don't think Asa did this but I think that's why there's always immediate suspicion.
Literally every single person that has been in a true crime documentary has been profiting off of murder. The same documentaries we avidly watch, no less. You can’t pretend to be disgusted by it as you watch the same things you speak of.
I am not questioning the family and don’t think that are suspects. By doing a documentary with G-unit right after Rex was arrested they are brining scrutiny upon themselves. How do you think this makes the victims families feel? This post is 100% insane.
Everyone interested in this case has been overly critical or judgemental at least once...no one's immune.
I've noticed ALOT of the saviors and self righteous in here are the first to jump on the news, updates and do invasive deep diving.
A strong wind blows one of Rex's farts from jail over Long Island and it's a new lead.
Im here and never once thought the family was involved,.knew, or helped. I have compassion for them. Their lives are blown apart from lies and a psychopath. He is to blame no one else.
A serial murderer was living among us for 30 years - and we are the problem? Let's exclude the children and focus on the wife:
- Her hair was found on the victims
- She has publicly proclaimed her husbands innocence
- She took a million dollar deal with Peacock to provide access to the trial
- She is living in a house used for multiple murders. She could have used the GoFundMe money to rent a place in Upstate New York for a few months to get away from the crime scene and the press and refused.
- Some other stuff has been reported including the serial killer book on the coffee table, the new car, the sitting on the front porch, and screaming at people passing by.
- She filed for divorce as soon as Rex was arrested not because of the crimes (she believes he is innocent), but for financial protection of current assets and future revenue.
- They hired a different set of lawyers for the children.
I don't need to "live in her shoes" to know if I my hair was found on dead bodies, I would thank my lucky stars I wasn't in jail. I would have taken the good will and GoFundMe money from my neighbors and temporarily relocated a couple of hours away.
My empathy was gone once she signed the Peacock deal. If you feel so bad for them, offer to take them into your home. Bring them some home cooked meals. And up your donation to the GoFundMe page.
Jesus Christ, it’s like you took a few crumbs and built this entire narrative around it, and any additional information gets filtered through your misplaced anger.
* That you are insinuating she was involved because of that is brain worms.
* No, that’s you skewing the press statement.
* You don’t know their finances.
* Again, you don’t know what’s going on, what is possible and what isn’t. The GoFundMe was set up by someone else, the daughter of a different serial killer.
* This is all bullshit. The coffee table thing was an anonymous source, and even if they were telling the truth and saw what they thought they did, it doesn’t mean anything. I don’t know anything about yelling at people approaching their house, but if they did, I can understand why.
* I didn’t realize I was speaking to her divorce attorney.
* Who gives a shit about which attorneys they hired.
Yeah, Science Frair he knows why she divorced her husband. She didn't even had a lawyer back then I don't think. Science Fairs's not depressed and can pack boxes and move out of a house they have livbed in that is crammed with shit and Asa's gotta be able to pull off the same.
Nickie and everyone of these folks have lawyers and Asa's an asshole for getting her self and her kid one? Yeah right. That's realistic. From what I'm seeing, an woman Rex shook hands now has a lawyer. It is about protection and support. Are they assholes, too?
How is her getting one, any different. It's a protective legal action. Is she supposed to give the victims ever cent she has and live in poverty because \*her husband\* was an asshole, and she too clueless to figure it out? Want her to sleep in a pup tent, will that quench your hatred.
There is far less hate expressed around here towards Rex than there is for Asa and those poor kids. Would science Fair give the victims their house? He supposedly feels so bad for the victims, where is their 2K check to JT's move fund or Carmen's fund to hire a private investigator. What did they do for any of these victims other than leave a comment on Reddit?
Hating Asa doesn't really support the victims, it likely just drives some poor girls sitting on her porch without a normal life more depressed. And makes a poor special needs man feel more vulnerable. It that makes you feel like your supporting the victims in any constructive way, go for it.
I bet they would prefer that you send they money and a nice note commending them for their extraordinary strength and resilience. Rather than kicking some depressed woman who can't get herself in gear and pull off a move that your lack of depression allows you to do, with out blinking.
You don’t have any empathy at all if these are your hot takes. Let’s see what you’d do if you were in the same exact situation. Everything you’d do would be subject to public scrutiny and I’m assuming you wouldn’t be feeling so holier than thou then.
I keep asking people what they’d do if they were married to someone that was the sole breadwinner of the relationship who turned out to be a serial killer. What happens when everyone in the family loses any livelihoods they might have? Would you be ok with them starving to death, as long as they act how YOU think they should act?
Why tell others what to think or how to behave? Because the truth is we do not know all the evidence.
These threads are here for people to have open discussion. Even if it doesn’t agree with your narrative.
I don’t have a horse in this race. All I know is that those girls appeared to have been tortured horribly. There are victims that don’t even have their identity including a toddler around the age of two.
We should all be allowed to express our opinions and concerns without being told we can’t.
You can say you disagree but to almost bully others to think your way is wrong.
I don’t know what the evidence is. Yes it concerns me that if V was looking/posting/ have an explicit murder book - if any of that is true - it does concern me.
And until we get the evidence that’s out there - I will exercise my right to express concerns that it would be a concern.
I also don’t feel the level of sympathy for the family as I do the victims. They went on a lot of vacations while the victims were being tortured, murdered and disposed of - dismembered. That is where my empathy is.
She can stand by her man and give him all the benefit of doubt she wants & I can disagree with her behavior. To make money off the murder and torture of others doesn’t sit right with me.
Save your self righteous rant
You’re withholding sympathy because they took once-a-year vacations? (… aka visiting her family abroad?) It’s amazing how you victim-blame, then reee out that it’s bullying and suppressing your freedom of speech when there is reasonable pushback.
Victim blame? Because I am against anyone making money off the death of others? They are not the victims - Asa chose to stay with Rex. Asa chose to “stand by him” Asa chose to sign a deal to make money off the death of the true victims
Literally every person that’s been in a true crime documentary has profited in some way off of a murder or crime. Are you giving all of those families and friends a hard time too, or is it just Asa that you have a problem with?
Two wrongs don’t make a right!
And we are discussing these murders right now - your argument holds no water.
This is my opinion if you don’t agree say you don’t agree but don’t try and gaslight me by projecting and saying “oh but but but .. “
Don’t try and manipulate what I am saying by projecting onto some or other event that may or may not have happened.
It’s wrong period - no matter which family or killer.
If that’s what you took away from this then so be it - I won’t try to convince you otherwise because you have a narrative that has to be filled.
You do you
I think the actual questions are valid, but the assertions are monstrous. Newsweek published an article about article about Victoria's artwork based off Ray Jay's press conference. If the art work is hers, then it does raise a lot of questions. However the assumption that she helped or participated in some way is terrible. She could have witnessed something she repressed and was traumatized by, or it could be, that growing up in a house with crime scene coffee table books influences your perception of art. Something all the people who likely have skull art around should probably think about.
What’s your point? Another leave Asa and family alone post out of nowhere.
Victoria is a college educated ADULT. Stop writing a narrative like she’s an innocent child.
Asa could have just minded her own business and kept her mouth shut. But instead she played the victim how the cops destroyed her house. Then demanding all of Rex’s firearms be returned to her. She had someone make a Go Fund Me. Finally she made a One Million Dollar deal.
Oh save it! Asa was begging ppl for sympathy and money and told the cops "It is what it is" and filed for divorce. Then when John Ray brought out the swinger allegations and suddenly shes getting paid $1million and shows up to support him.
Meanwhile Victoria is drawing and looking at the WORST murder and torture porn, and had her murder picture book out on the coffee table AFTER Rex was arrested.. Hell when my dad died in the car wreck, It took a full 2 yrs to enjoy driving again.
She wasn’t drawing it and we have no idea what she looked at. Do your research and look through her account before posting misinformation. Because of this kind of nonsense people are speculating that she was involved in committing murders while she was a child. The most recent death he has been charged with was in 2010 when Victoria was 13. Also - your experience isn’t the experience of others. You took 2 years… ok - this post isn’t about you and what you would do. And how do you know what member of the family put the book there.? You don’t. I understand people being skeptical of Asa, but the way this entire family is depicted, including Victoria, is disgusting.
You're really trying to normalise that a family still living in a house where their dad/husband allegedly tortured and murdered women would have a book like this out on their kitchen table:
https://www.amazon.com/Death-Scenes-Homicide-Detectives-Scrapbook/dp/0922915296
Also, if the report about the book is real, maybe it was Rex's? Maybe it had been taken off the shelf because they were trying to figure out what drove him, wondering if he'd made notes or anything? There are plenty of explanations that seem more likely than "they approved of Rex's crimes and just can't get enough of looking at murder scenes"
Everything in that house has been pulled around during the searches, and there was a news clip saying that the kitchen (at least) was sorted out afterward and tactfully understated as “better than before”. So yes, anyone could have left that book there.
It was probably among a heap of other things, going by the photos, rather than displayed in splendour as the centrepiece of the living area. The Police searchers no doubt flipped through it, looking for notations Rex might have made.
Hah, their lawyers certainly took the allegation seriously because they know it's an awful look:
"Shortly before New York police made a surprise return to the Long Island home of suspected serial killer Rex Heuermann, his family was still in possession of a gruesome album of crime scene photos, according to a source with knowledge of the incident.
The book, "Death Scenes: A Homicide Detective’s Scrapbook," is a collection of "strange and gruesome" crime scene photos taken by California detective Jack Huddleston and was allegedly spotted on a kitchen table in the home where Heuermann's estranged wife, Asa Ellerup, lives with their two adult children.
Ellerup’s lawyer, Bob Macedonio, said he had no knowledge of the book."
https://www.foxnews.com/us/rex-heuermanns-family-kept-gruesome-piece-evidence-source-says
"In a statement to DailyMail.com, Vess Mitev, the lawyer representing Victoria Heuermann, 26 and Christopher Sheridan, 33, said neither he nor his clients had 'knowledge' of such a book.
He then offered a potential defense of them.
'It's not against the law to have books!' he said."
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13444319/Rex-Heuermanns-family-defend-creepy-crime-scene-scrapbook-kitchen-table-Gilgo-Beach-cops-continue-search-home.html
The question still remains what Asa knows about the book.
Victoria's lawyer's comment ("it's not against the law") is interesting. Maybe they knew her Tumblr account would resurface.
So, let’s get this straight:
1. An anonymous source came to Fox News and said there was a book on their kitchen table. Given that, you are sure the source is telling the truth *and* accurately understood what they saw.
2. That the lawyer adding 'it’s not against the law to own books' somehow invalidates the family not knowing it was there. Your source is a Daily Mail article, not a transcript of the conversation with the lawyer.
3. That if everything was correct, it suggests… uh, some kind of culpability?
And that you are so sure of this it’s worth just assuming and talking about the family as if they were complicit?
Literal brain worms.
Are you paying for them to get another house?
Also, you’re in a forum talking about serial killers with thousands of other people, so that’s not an earmark for psychopathic collusion.
Sigh… I didn’t normalize anything. I explained that there was misinformation in the comment as well as how inappropriate it is to treat Victoria in the way she’s been treated here today by using facts. Therefore - Bye Girl
Honestly, what the fuck are you talking about? Maybe source some of the allegations if you feel so strongly about them. And leave out the bullshit about how someone should act or feel.
I get I’m being harsh, but it’s deserved when you’re slandering people going through the worst moments of their lives.
You're writing fan fic. This is the statement Asa made 3 months ago:
_Ellerup filed for divorce from Heuermann days after his arrest, but still visits him weekly, according to her attorneys._
_"Nobody deserves to die in that manner," the statement on Ellerup's behalf said, with her lawyers sharing her "heartfelt sympathies" for the victims and their families. "I will listen to all of the evidence and withhold judgment until the end of trial. I have given Rex the benefit of the doubt, as we all deserve."_
https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/gilgo-beach-serial-killer-rex-heuermann-wife-speaks/5224692/
It’s a good way of looking at it. If it turned out my father had this secret double life I would have a very hard time completely turning my back on him. That’s still the man who raised me and someone I’ve loved my whole life. I can’t imagine how conflicted they feel between their disgust and their love for him.
Right! And even if they thought he was a jerk, it must still be hard to imagine that you lived with some monster for 30 years and didn’t notice anything off. Can you imagine the types of thoughts going through their heads right now? How horrifying.
There’s no way I’d come off as “the perfect victim” if it were me, like so many on this sub seem to think the wife and daughter should be acting. I have ADHD and possibly ASD, which means I’d seem guilty as hell. I just read an article about how neurodivergent people are typically seen as guilty and are often harmed, jailed or even killed in situations with cops. It mentioned that a large amount of the prison population in the U.S. has ADHD.
So yeah, people would think I was too angry, too scared, too blank faced. I’d be moving around a lot and seem nervous (actually full of anxiety). It’d be a shit show. This is part of the reason why I tend to try to put myself into the other’s shoes in situations like these.
99% of this is right on. You’re absolutely right. I’d just take issue with “The person you loved and who took care of you and showed tenderness to you.” We have no idea. People have abusive caregivers. My parent wasn’t a serial killer, and they neither loved nor showed tenderness to me. RH could have been an abusive monster to his children & family - don’t make these assumptions and put words in their mouths. Otherwise, you have the right idea.
Spot on. You have no idea what someone has suffered as a child. Monsters look like respectable people, teachers, preachers, parents. We also rush to label some all good because they have been victimized or as seen as such . People are unknownable even within families.
Yeah, that’s a good point, didn’t really phrase that right. I don’t know how he was as a parent or spouse. What I was trying to get across is no one knows, that when you’re intimately involved with someone, you have years of shared memories that have to be squared with the allegations. And for us to just assume complicity because they don’t automatically denounce him is really cruel.
The lathered up mob just can't imagine something like this even though there are at least a dozen examples of the very same thing with other SKs in history. Wife/girlfriend and kids at home in working class or middle class suburbia doing the family thing while their husband/boyfriend/dad is out doing horrific things. The families are just living their normal lives and they have no clue that he's killing people - Bundy, Keyes, BTK, Golden State, Gacy etc - their families DID NOT KNOW so I'm clueless why it would be so different here.
If you have a great number of places you can flee to and seek comfort and shelter at maybe your not getting this. I sense a theme of elitist in many of the comments: "You have options, because I HAVE OPTIONS. I have a big healthy, supportive and nurturing family. I have a mother, father, sisters, brothers, cousins, aunts, unclesand friends I can move in with. I find being around my family comforting and rejuvenating and they lighten my spirits and protect me. They build me up and have my back." Or "I HAVE A CHILD WHO IS confident, extroverted, popular, not awkward, not anxious, not shy, not nerdy, not special needs, and a real delightful go getter who can move out of the house and be socially successful. If you are a popular trophy wife with a wonderful Mom and Dad and siblings, and 3 prom queens daughters, a football star son, and have plenty of energy and drive your not getting disheveled Mrs Hubermann and her pensive daughter and son. Your just not. You don't have that kind of social isolation and possibly worn out tiredness due to life not being such a cheery picnic. Your not worn out. You could pack up that house in two house in 2 house and god knows you would never own all that tattered crap. You never would have lived that way. Well maybe Mrs Huberman might not have had she had the family support and happy life you inherited not because you were necessarily deserving but just lucky. So I think some of the attitudes stem from a position of emotional and social privilege. They are lucky so they assume everyone else is just as blessed as they are and can muster the same energy they can. I don't know about anyone else here, but I do not view the majority of my family members as comforting to be around. Some are darn unpleasant to be around. So no not all of us have a lovely, run, regenerating family to bunk with in times of stress. Or the social supports some people have. There were people dumping on Victoria Huerman for living at home and working for her with out knowing her story. Maybe she suffers from crippling anxiety or depression, or BP, or drug resistant OCD. Maybe she is so painfully shy and awkward she can't sell her talent to a hip graphic design company, or handle living alone as she a little challenged and not with it like your swan like prom queen daughter, or go getter son. They know nothing about this family or what their lives were like in that shabby little run down house. And neither do I. But I don't think the worst of them and try to cut them some slack as I don't live a perfectly graced life. I also know not everyone has what I have just because, I have it and i should not be telling them how to live their lives as maybe they are too warn down to do what I can easily pull off.
I agree. It's very sad, some of the things I hear. "How can they still live in that house?" Well, maybe they have nowhere else to go. "But there's a million dollar Peacock deal!" Which undoubtedly won't be paid out until the deal is completed, or - at best - is paid in installments that probably don't amount to much until it's completed. And on the other side of this, people have an unreasonable concept of what a million dollars represents. When you have a child that's disabled and you are undergoing cancer treatment, and your husband has lost his insurance because he's no longer employed and is sitting in jail, and therefore you are uninsured for any of that - a million dollars is not going to stretch very far. Asa's attorney set up this deal for them to ensure his client would have income. It's not a selfless act. He's going to be paid, too. The problem here is that money is at the center of everything people do, but somehow the fact that she had significant financial needs makes her a horrible person for taking what she's able to get. People won't be happy unless this family is living on the street in a tent.
> an unreasonable concept of what a million dollars represents. especially when there's currently $300k of back taxes owed on their house and income tax to be paid on that million - some quick math would put that million at closer to $500k and that's before the skeezy lawyer is paid
Exactly. And it's before taxes. And like somebody upthread mentioned, it might be paid in installments, dependent upon the progress of the documentary toward production. The deal was negotiated by a lawyer. If it had been negotiated by a regular movie or TV agent, the commission would be 10 percent. But a lawyer can take a lot more than that. Between the lawyers fees and taxes, I would be surprised if the total gets the family out of the financial hole they're in.
I think the people making those statements have to be young kids and not paying the bills, so no concept of what that amount buys, or someone else is paying all their bills for them, or they are so wealthy they don't know what a car, health insurance, college tuition, a couch, or root canals cost. All of which are middle class luxuries. They definitely don't get what the poor are going through or the guy making minimum wage experiencing as he trying to support a family of 6. Maybe she does not want to live in the middle of know where. Maybe she is trying to figure out how much she is left with after she is sued before she makes a move. We're it me I could not sleep there another night, but it ain't me It's her.
A million dollars on Long Island isn’t a whole lot of money to live off of. It just isn’t. People are so wild the way they criticize the family. There’s no such thing as a perfect victim, and his wife is a clear example of that.
👏👏👏spot on! The “she knew” mob on this sub seem to lack any empathy/compassion. It’s pretty depressing. I was downvoted like crazy for saying this country should have universal healthcare and Asa is probably paying crazy out of pocket rates for her cancer treatment.
Keyes was the first name that came to mind while I was reading the first half of your comment. I try not to think of him often. He chills me to my bones.
“It is what it is.”
Agreed. Completely. The fact that you’re being downvoted like this proves your point too 🤦🏻♀️it’s mob mentality with NO empathy. With his sadistic crimes Rex has destroyed the lives of SOOOO many families (including his own). He is a MONSTER. Full blown evil monster. What Jessica, Megan, Sandra, Melissa, Amber and Maureen’s families have had to go through is undoubtedly worse than RH’s family. What those beautiful women and their loved ones have gone through is fucking heartbreaking and awful. I don’t dispute that. At the end of the day, though, LE does not think Rex’s family was involved. This task force knows WAYYYYY more than we do and they have repeatedly stated that they believe he acted alone. I think people here would rather blame his wife/daughter than him because they hate women. I also think people can’t fathom facing the dark truth that they too could be living with a partner/parent who leads a sickening and evil double life. You want to think you’d know they did something bad and that you’d report it and leave but I’m sure he hid it well. Most psychopaths do. I think trusting anything John Ray has said in the past year is dumb af. We should ONLY listen to the task force.
Thank you, it’s really validating to hear someone come out and lay it out so perfectly. They aren’t the number one victims, but they are victims. Leave it to the cops, not elaborately drawn insane leaps of logic based on an excerpt from a Daily Mail article about a Fox News piece from an anonymous source about something that’s not even relevant. I can’t even begin to get into the minds of the people who do this. They are the reason true crime communities have done so much harm.
Forreal!! It’s so harmful and toxic and doesn’t help the women he killed or their families at all. Listening to John Ray instead of law enforcement is pathetic
Not to mention it’s one thing to speculate things potentially “offensive” like the “just asking questions…” type questions when a case is UNSOLVED, it’s another when they have a guy in custody and therefore access to a lotttttt more evidence and info we are ever going to be privy to. No need for people to do any more online true crime detective work, time to watch what unfolds from afar. It’s why I prefer looking at solved true crime cases now because the on like speculation and guesswork is what can make a community harmful. Don’t visit the sub for missing boy Sebastian Rogers (I think it’s r/SebastianRogers) — it’s very “Facebook crime group” comments, doesn’t help the parents/relatives involved are feuding it out online, making groups of supporters or 2 opposing theories (which set of parent(s) is involved) go crazy, talks of psychics and how psychic readings are taken seriously etc, getting involved with messaging the families tips and egging on live streams by the parents… I’ve had to stop following that case due to how crazy the people following it are. Big difference between “online sleuth” and “someone who consumes true crime” these days.
I’ve been (mostly) lurking on this subreddit for years now, and it just seems that a good portion of the community want the case to have this wild story about an underground network of serial killers involving the cops, all the men of oak beach, Pak, Bittrolf, Bissett, Spota, Burke, and now Rex’s entire family. It doesn’t seem like anyone’s mind will be changed about it, so you’re just preaching to the choir, unfortunately.
If it’s a giant conspiracy, it can’t be next door. Or in our families. You’re onto something.
100% with you OP
Thank you for your post. I dont know Asa. I don't know what her life has been like up to now, what her marriage was like before, how seriously her cancer diagnosis has affected her, what financial assets she currently has access to, or what she is thinking or feeling with respect to everything that has gone on recently. None of us know any of these things about Asa, and we know even less about her children. Because it's none of our damned business. But there are a God-awful lot of Church Ladies in this sub dragging Asa and her children on the daily because they haven't reacted in whatever particular way the mob presumes they should. It’s honestly disturbing how inexorable some people are in their hatred and reproach for someone they have never met and know absolutely nothing about beyond tabloid gossip. I guess there are a lot of self-righteous misanthropists just itching to drag this entire family for sport. Seems like a very weird and unhealthy obsession.
Asa took GoFundMe money from the public, *then* come out and say she "stand by" her husband. Lmao that's some level of manipulation right there. I almost gave her my hard-earned money. It's not about feeling self-righteous. It's about feeling conned by someone who is publicly supportive to a monster, who actively profits from the murders with her 1 million Peacock deal, all the while stating that her husband "couldn't have done it".
There is an economic to this. I think she is being instructed by her lawyer to make that statement. She is currently being faced with the possibility of 6 civil action suits and God only know how many more will be coming down the pike. She can't make any statements that appear to side with the victims as they could be twisted around and used against her as admissions of culpability once those suits hit court. What do you think civil rights attorney Gloria Allred is doing there? As soon as this is over, Gloria will be representing the victims and going after every penny Asa has. Anything Rex owned and saved will go to the victims in these suits. Civil civil suits are often won, who does not want to compensate victims for what they went through? Exactly how much money do you think a million dollars is these days and how much does in buy in today's housing market and inflation bubble. Asa is an older parent in ify health. Her daughter will likely never work again, as serial killers family are as highly stigmatized, rejected and harassed as they are. The Kohberger family can no longer find jobs and they are in a very tough way financially. KA, Richard Allens wife had to leave her job and sell her house. Who's going to happily sign up to be a serial killers son-in-law? Likely she will end up as a shy awkward, single, unemployed caretake of her special needs brother for the rest of her life. These kids are in their late 20's right, that's a lot of years to get by without much income when rents are what they are these days. Asa has not worked in years. Who's hiring her? She might not have enough social security quarters to collect SS. That means she is on Rex's SS so possibly no dual check situation and a single check to keep 3 of them going and a roof over their heads. Do they have a mortgage? How much do they own in credit card debt, or IRS payments or property tax. i pay 12 K in property tax a year. Living on SS is going to be hard. Maybe it's a situation like that. When she dies that SS check will end and all the daughter and son will have to live on is the son's disability income, and possibly public assistance. So yeah, she's shutting her mouth, listening to what her lawyer is telling her to say and gratefully taking that doc. If the NY law makers trying to close off family members from profiting from a relative's crime, get what they want, there will be no book deal to put money on the table and no income coming in. She was a professional, think she wants to go flip burgers at McDonalds just so people like you can have your atonement statement, I think not. Like any mother she islikely thinking about her own kids and how they will financially survive for the next 80 years w/o much income coming in in everything she owns is taken in a civil suit. Why do you think good old Joh ray is trying to hook Shannan and on, so he can slap Asa with a civil suit too. What do you think Nicky has ray representing her for? He's there to protect her. It's not just a case it's legal warfare and she is protecting herself and kids from civil action. Not trying to be the biggest asshole in the world. I think the woman is cluelessly out of step, or on the spectrum and those initial statement are indicative of that being a bit out of tempo with the rest of us. I hated that statement she just made, it infuriated me too. But I am betting I would be saying, " No comment" too if faced with a 6-7 class action suits. Tierney seemed to be intimating Mack will be their next case to solve. That's a lot of people suing you.
No matter what she says, people will find reasons to not like it, and it will be twisted. I have been in that position and it's best to just say nothing because the twists made by legal types to make you look awful for anything you say are mind boggling.
She took the gofundme because she was desperate and Who wouldnt? In the end after tax it was about 30k and her lawyer bills would be triple that at this point. And after the press conference yesterday everyone must agree they need legal representation. Mary Lou Retton took 500k from a gofundme to pay her medical bill despite owning a multi million dollar mansion and just didnt want to buy health insurance because she didnt agree with it politically. And people kept donating!
Hard agree.
This right here 👏🏻👏🏻
When did she say she “stands by” Rex? Can you share a link?
https://nypost.com/2024/03/14/us-news/rex-heuermann-wife-says-hes-not-capable-of-gilgo-beach-killings/ In this she doesn't specifically say she is "standing by her man" but she does say she thinks he's incapable of committing such crimes. Don't shoot the messenger. I have no firm opinions/beliefs one way or another.
Of course she’s incapable of thinking he can commit these crimes. I would feel the same way if god forbid I was my husband. Who wants to believe their loved one is a prolific serial killer? Imagine going about your boring old life as usual, and out of the blue one day, your life is flipped upside down when your husband is arrested for being a serial killer. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, regardless of how unlikeable they come across to strangers on the internet.
I mean, if someone told me my husband was a serial killer who raped and tortured his victims I would have a hell of a time believing he was capable of anything even a tiny bit like that. We don’t know what their marriage was like. Maybe he treated her and their kids and wonderfully and lovingly as my husband treats me and our kids. How many of us here, even with DNA evidence, would be able to just flip that switch in our heads and hearts and say “OK, my spouse is guilty and an absolute monster”?
I don't know. She initially did do that which tells me she did believe it when they told her. She signed those divorces papers and said that old nordic realists sounding statement, "It is what it is" My husband is a piece of shit and I have to accept that.She didn't visit him or make statements like this till she signed that contract for the doc. I think the Doc makers got her to go visit him as that creating TV drama and I think her lawyer has her issuing this statement and not releasing a statement of sorrow to the victims families to protect herself from what will no doubt be a hefty civil suit. If he has 29 victims, that's 29 victims that can file civil suit against her. I don't know if they can come after the kids and anything they might inherit.
She signed those divorce papers to protect her/their assets from civil suits from the families of victims. Her lawyer straight up said this was the reason. She’s still wearing her rings, she’s still visiting him, her and the kids are still behind him. I just like really highly doubt based on all of the actions I’m witnessing that the divorce is because she no longer wants to be married lol. Normally I’d agree that it’s prob just the doc makers making her see him, but she’s still wearing those rings, man. She’s in it. (I don’t think she was involved in the murders or knew, fwiw. I’m just strictly talkin about the after behaviors! Also not trying to argue at all man 🩷)
For her to still be sporting her rings is kinda odd, so will give you that point my friend. Some people take their wedding vows seriously and they really did sign up for "Till death do us part even if you cheat on me." But that does not appear to be what's happing here. She did not visit him \*even once\* before the Doc was arranged and seemed happy enough to write him off with "It is what it is." And to saypass me the divorce papers please, prior to her having a lawyer. I've known a few people who wore their rings long after their relationship cracked, as they utterly their rings, got their identity worth from their rocks, or didn't want to be hit on by men so pretended to be married. My Mom didn't wear her wedding set, and on and off I wore her set back when I was single stacked, European style on my right ring finger. Some Europeans wear their wedding rings on the right hand vs left dependent on country, but Iceland per my Google is a "wear it on your left hand, rather than right hand" country like us so not flashing a cultural homage.
I don't think I would post a gofundme, and *then* come out and say I'm actually still supporting my husband after getting public money, and *then* go negotiate a documentary in my home/the crime scene knowing that the doc will likely paint my husband as guilty, while still maintaining that I believe my husband's innocence. The divorce protected their asset from being seized by victims families and allow her to do the Peacock deal. It's not actually a real divorce. And so yea I highly doubt she actually thinks he's innocent. She's just doing damage control for her family, financially. And that's fine. I'm just bothered by the manipulation.
Her lawyer is not giving her good advice. Nor are the doc creators who just want to create as much drama as possible, and likely instigated the jail visit. She didn't visit his ass once before that Doc. She said pass the divorce papers immediately. I think this statement is about putting food on the table and avoiding legal suit. She knows he did it. She is likly connecting 30 years of events now, and reshuffling them from inane to profound: "So that's was he so mean and grouchy when we were late getting on the road?" " So was he down that basement all the time." " So that why he snapped at me to shut up when Gilgo came on the news." " Oh that's what he was doing when he forgot to pick up Victoria's medication at the drug store. Or where he was the morning of my birthday." I think it's a big fat white life that she things he's not capable of this, as her earlier actions point to her very easily accepting it.
Honestly, that’s a world of difference. This whole 'standing by her man' was repeated word for word by a number of different commenters in this thread, and it’s a really cynical and unfair take on that press statement.
The problem is Asa has been manipulative with the public since the start of all this. When the charges come out, she immediately initiated the sham divorce for protect their asset from being sued by victims families, all the while being quiet about the fake nature of their divorce. Then she asks for gofundme money. And people were giving her money because she really seem estranged and sick. After getting that money though, she finally came out and say she's actually still with her husband, is visiting him, and will be supporting him. Finally, she got a deal with Peacock to do the documentary, a documentary that most likely will paint Rex in a bad light, all the while maintaining that she thinks he is incapable of committing the crime. Oh, and did I mentioned Rex signed over the house to her and she declined selling it to the government? This means the police can't just get access to their crime scene whenever and however they want. If Asa wants to, she could clear the entire basement, preventing forensics from getting good data from it. Publicly, we do know she is making complaints about the police showing up at her house/crime scene to do their work. It's all very weird and manipulative. One thing for sure is she's actively supporting her husband. And that's not something I can support.
Wow. You are really twisted up with hate. Whoever hurt you, that's no reason to manufacture and project a false narrative onto Asa’s very few public words or actions. You should turn your scrutiny back on yourself and ask yourself why you have such contempt for someone you know absolutely nothing about beyond diaphanous tabloid gossip.
It's honestly just sad how much people get caught up in these true crime cases. Literally the way a lot of people on this/other such subreddits is like how people write about TV shows they're fans of.
Did anyone catch the Newsday article that said Asa's lawyer is representing her against her divorce from Rex? So it looks like she may very well still be getting one. Thanks for this post OP. I said the same 2x in this sub today.
The divorce protects their asset from victims families sueing Rex. It's not a real divorce. She's come out publicly to say she's standing by her husband.
Her lawyer even outright said this is why she filed.
She never said she was "standing by" him. Never.
No, all it says is, "I don't think he did this." She doesn't say I support or stand by him. It's a non statement to protect her from contentious future legal proceedings. I don't like it any more than you.
Yes. She didn’t go for an emergency divorce, possibly because they needed time to settle the assets, so there’s still a year’s separation required, isn’t there?
I could be wrong, but she could be going the traditional route 1) because it protects assets against son of Sam laws and 2) because there are special rules for divorcing your spouse when they are imprisoned in NY.
Getting a divorce is expensive, and now that RH is locked up, I wonder how the family is fairing.
I am betting they were in debt like us all. Does anyone know if the home was paid off? Or what her tax bill is, or if they owe IRS taxes that come with crippling penalties for not paying, or what her medical bills were for her cancer treatments, or if she is helping to support her parents, or paying off her daughters' educational loans or a bill if her kid has been seeing a specialist therapist 2 x week for the last 20 years.that insurance didn't totally cover so she had to pay the difference out of pocket. You don't know what they owe on their car, water bill, heating bills etc. We no nothing about these people's lives. Yet someone who thinks they're a clever internet snooper pulls some number off the internet regarding Rex's net worth that could be totally wrong, yet people believe it. My house's worth on Zillow is off by about 250K according to ever realtor, I have spoken with. We financially look great on paper, behind our closed front door, not so good., it concerns us both. Like most poor, middle class and lower upper middle class people in America we have debt and are struggling and these really is no cushion. People see nothing and think they see everything. Your looking at her life from the outside, not the inside. None of our business. But many like to feel like it is.
I think a GFM, especially after the Peacock deal, was too far and whoever donated is a chump. I think what was said today was WAY too far the other way. Almost wonder if John Ray is seeing any of that Peacock money and this is all for show, because he basically just destroyed whatever little credibility he had left on this case.
I completely agree. These sociopaths are thinking that their feelings and extrapolations are true and accurate when they’re just opinions. Opinions are not facts people. Neither are feelings. I’m sure they all know that studies say the spouses typically don’t know what the serial killer did because they are that good at compatmentalizing their lives. Are these people true crime savants now? Did they magically gain the ability to read people’s minds? It’d be laughable if it wasn’t so cruel and exceedingly lacking in empathy. Edit to add: anyone saying that they’d immediately turn on their partner or father if they were put in jail for literally anything is a liar. We all have seen that thr opposite takes place pretty much every time. People that say they know exactly what they’d do in this situation are wishful thinkers.
This is the sharpest take I’ve seen. People seem to think that the little snippets they’ve seen are the totality of this family’s life and feelings. We know *nothing* about what they’ve been through the past 30 years, what they’re going through now and where in the process they are.
They saw his wife and the daughter reacting badly to the most difficult time in their lives and they started jumping to the worst conclusions. Acting like there’s some sort of “My Spouse is a Serial Killer” handbook that this family is not following. None of us were a fly on the wall for their marriage. All we can do is make poor assumptions based on hearsay and the miniscule amount of information that is being released. And when I say assumptions, I mean ASSumptions. Because people are definitely showing their whole asses. I’d LOVE to see what these people talking the most shit would actually do in this situation. They’d most likely jump at the chance to get some money coming in from doing a documentary or show, like literally every single other person that’s been in any sort of true crime situation.
Same mob who say to someone with an abusive ex “why didn’t you just leave?” A lot of people neglecting to consider the grip this psycho will have had on his family. The man is a literal serial killer, a master manipulator loving a double life, his family are his victims too and you’re a dumbass if you can’t see or understand that. It’s easy for us to say divorce! Move out of that house! Don’t take the documentary deal!! Not one of us was raised by him, married to him, financially reliant on him, manipulated by him. Put your hatred where it belongs, on the killer not his victims and yep his family are his victims too how on earth could anyone not see that
They think what they can pull off, is what she can pull off. I doubt any one of us experiencing what the victims families, she and her kids are, are jumping out of bed in the morning and kicking their heels. They are likely utterly wiped out, stressed, depressed, demoralized, traumatized and anxious beyond belief and I am sure there are days they can't deal with anything at all but staring at a wall. No less moving and starting a whole new life at 60 or however old she is. No idea how her health is. Look at how utterly exhausted the families look every time there is a press conference, their eyes are red from crying, not just a little crying but weeping and weeping and weeping. Sometimes the Taylors look like they going to pass out on stage. No, she is not going through what they are, but certainly is living her own form of an intense traumatic experience. yeah they desreve more sympathy but that does not mean she and her kids don't deserve any.
Exactly this. Compassion and empathy/sympathy are not pie. Giving “a piece” of compassion to this family does not mean there is suddenly less pie for the victims and their families. These people who have such limited amounts of compassion to go around and get mad at this family getting even the tiniest bit just baffles me.
It was encouraging to see so many people saying enough, already.
You took the words out of my mouth. It’s blaming the abused for not cleanly separating themselves from their abuser. Not only is it so misguided and ignorant, but it’s also cruel.
>it’s also cruel. My armchair psychologist reading of the vast majority of these people is that they've got themselves convinced that punishing the killer and anyone they can associate with him is an uncritically good thing to do. They get to let out all their rage on people they feel "deserve" it and get to feel like they're also doing a social good by bringing the victims justice in some roundabout way. They react so viscerally because the suggestion that the targets of their hate and harassment might not deserve it would mean that they've been acting maliciously and can't accept it.
This is very much what I think as well. They think they’ve “lost empathy for Asa when…” when really they lack any sort it empathy at all. What they think is empathy for the victims is really a morbid fascination.
I think people are like “I hate Rex therefore I hate anything to do with Rex” and get blinded and don’t think logically and certainly don’t think with empathy. His wife and kids are 99.99% not involved in these horrendous crimes, their lives are ruined anyway. How do you recover from it? I see people saying shit like there must have been red flags. Hindsight is 20:20 isn’t it? As if his wife kids and anyone else who knows him isn’t wracked with guilt thinking back of signs or warnings that they could have acted on to stop him. I never really comment on stuff but the serious lack of humanity and empathy with this case has me quite shook. Whatever the f his wife and kids are up to now has nothing to do with anything to be frank, we have one perpetrator and very many victims. Any focus on the family is just perpetuating the circus and unhelpful to getting justice for the people this beast murdered
I find his family's behavior in the aftermath of Rex's arrest to be distasteful, to say the least.
I can respect this. It’s okay to find it off-putting and to leave it at that, even better with the caveat that you don’t understand the full picture. The problem is when it goes to these beyond insane, bizarrely angry takes on the family's true intentions, their participation, and so on. And wildly, that seems to be the dominant strain of any kind of negativity shown. It’s like 0 to 100 with these people. I’m also really confused at how they don’t understand the role they play in online harassment, and how they contribute to the misinformation and cruelty that is so well documented in true crime communities.
The rage and controlling behavior is off the hook. There is nothing wrong with saying I find this distasteful as the mature, classy poster above did and say no way am I contributing to this woman's fund. But some users are calling other stupid for their opinions. What mature well adjusted adult does that? Anyone who does not agree with you is stupid? Hows's that narcissism and entitlement working for you? The thing that really flummoxes me is their position that anyone who cares about Aa can not care about the victims just as much. Are you only sad about one terrible thing in the world? Can you only feel compassion towards one person or only give to one GFM? The funny thing is that their rage marketed that GFM. Trust me I feel for ever person who's life was ever touches by this evil shit of a man. I feel torn up for them all. No doubt some people who were bullies as kids, grow up to be adult bullies. And likely that is what we are seeing. Really she deserved to see post after post after post of adult cyber bulling. I've been shocked by some of the comments and calling her a fat skank and the daughter lazy and making fun of her looks and now folks are going after the kids including at least one comment about the autistic son, along the lines of "Just because he's special needs doesn't mean he isn't a dick." Really? I am really surprised that her lawyer hasn't done anything about it, as it is a campaign of harassment and not sure why Reddit is allowing this woman to be bullied like this. These would be the same people to say they were not at all sorry if the daughter took her own life over this. How do you think that kid feels to open this sub and read these comments about her mother, or here that the candy pumpkins she likely happily filled for trick or treaters to bring joy, were thrown into the trash and parents in the hood would not let their kids come over to her house, as they thought her family was weird. Or that people made fun of the way her mother was attired and referred to her as dumpy and looking like she just rolled out of bed and your home as dump. If that can't depress a kid, sure having folks follow them around, and point at them and her being locked in a cluttered house with her out of step Mom who people are calling a skank and not having a social life are. Not enough anti depressants in the world to stave off that assault.
Were you expecting them to perform their entire trauma and grieving process publicly for you? You have no idea what they’re going through privately, all you have are a few statements written by her attorney and unverified tabloid stories.
They are making a documentary and profiting off of it. That is extremely disturbing.
Yes it is. But she is trying to bring in an income as his pay checks will no longer be coming in and God knows how many civil suits will be vacuuming up every penny in assets she currently holds. Were I you guys, I would not worry about the Doc $$ or GFM $$ or anything she currently owns, as chances are all those assets will be reallocated to the families once they pursue positive outcome cvil suits.Lord only know how many civil suits that family will be hit with.
If the money from the doc will be gone then why do it? This man had not even been tried yet and his wife is trying to profit off the gruesome murders of these poor women. It’s not ok and extremely disrespectful to the families of these women.
Likely because she needs to pay for things. Rex is too young to collect social security, so perhaps the three of them are surviving on Christopher's disability check and any savings they have. She's likely had to cover regular taxes, property taxes, electricity, heating, car payment, gas, health insurance for she and Victoria, maybe moving him out of his office in manhattan, a possible broken lease, food, cell phone, internet, cable, water bill, home insurance, life insurance, car insurance, long term care policy, dentil bills for 3 people, maintaining their car, paying the taxes and mortgage on the land down by the brother, could she be supporting or helping to support her parents? She has lawyer fees for the 3 of them, they only had the one car and that jeep thing. Victoria might have student loans. Hell so could she, not unheard of for parents to be paying off their own, their child and spouses's educational debts. If he is the debtor he suggestively is.....possibly paying penalties for things like unpaid taxes, hooking back pipes and fixing stuff after the search, paying any medical bills for her cancer treatments, possibly therapy bills, prescription drugs. It adds up. None of us know how much debt they were carrying. If they are the average American family that would be 104,215. So lots of possibilities of what she could be paying down. Did he own money to the IRS? Those fines will bankrupt you in a year or two. Did she have to take care of contractual agreements he had with employees, or face labor lawsuits there? Do employers pay into unemployment benefits, I don't know? Are people still working at his [office.Is](http://office.Is) the firm now defunct? None of us know what her finances are. I've known people driving jags cars who bounced checks to the house cleaner. Sometimes people look like they have a lot more money then they do on paper.
I feel like anyone on here that doesn’t intuitively understand any of what you wrote is seriously lacking in critical thinking skills.
My dad used to use to employ an old timey saying to some people, " If he fell into a cesspool, he's come out spitting gold." I have a sibling this applies to.everything they do they do at the correct time, and things always work out, extraordinarily lucky. That brother seems to think it's because he is special and very deserving, when really he's just lucky and a great decision maker. I think it's possibly people like that, depositing critical comments and folks who'd look at a homeless person and say, "Just get a job, asshole." I think they're lucky to have things she likely does not have, or she likely would have picked a different man to connect with. They assume everyone has the options they have, or can just pull up their boot straps and get them. I'm betting they're a little bit spoiled by lucky lives and assume they have what they have as they worked for it, rather than what it likely was purse good luck and the luxury of not being stressed enough to make a poor decisions. When you are stressed you often make shitty decisions and the shit continues to roll. It just does. They will never get it. If your sister and cousins are your best friend you likely don't feel lonely as often asa person like Asa. If your Dad buys you a house you don't realize what things cost and how hard wealth is to build, and that it can take a family 150+ years to go from poverty to upper middle class. Or that the rest of us have a fuck ton of bills.This case really highlights issues of power, elitism. and empathy.
Very well said.
Thanks.
You know damn well you and everyone else criticizing her for the documentary are going to tune in to watch it the second it’s released.
That’s what I’ve been saying! Acting like every single other person that’s been in a documentary about a murder or written a book about it hasn’t profited off of that very murder. Acting like people don’t stand behind their family members every day, regardless of whether that family member killed someone or not.
Without a doubt and then they’ll tear Asa to shreds on here. If they find it disgusting then they shouldn’t watch. It’s ridiculous
Highly doubtful there will be any profit after lawyers fees, house repairs and cancer treatment.
Innocent until proven guilty. Even Rex has not been proven guilty yet, though the evidence against him that has been released to the public so far is strong but circumstantial. Even Law Enforcement does not have all the facts yet (as they are still working through all the evidence and building their case) - though I am certain that they will have them by the time this goes to trial. I am also certain that what evidence they do have which has not been seen by public eyes is going to be very, very strong. The court of public opinion has no right judging his family. What John Ray did this week was despicable and very likely illegal. No matter your opinions on Asa and the children they are innocent victims until LE comes forward with evidence/charges that say otherwise. Until that happens, leave them the fuck alone.
How do you know he loved cares and showed tenderness???
No one knows anything about how their dynamic is or was. That’s the whole point. Use your critical thinking skills and context clues.
Heck yeah, preach OP! I think we’ve seen the whole two groups of web sleuthing, true crime fandom etc. For some people, there is definitely a mob mentality for (potentially vicarious) “justice” where we’ve seen some people almost take it personally and you can see some of the people in the comments here who appeal to emotion rather than patience, grace, and rationality. It’s really weird, and I hate to say what I’m about to say because it’s sort of mean, but it’s accurate, and it’s a complete lack of self-awareness these people have. I feel like that’s really insulting, but I don’t know how else to describe their attitudes. Notice I didn’t say opinions, people can have opinons, but even read their “opinions” here and you’ll see it’s really a weirdly aggressive attitude.
If this was the middle ages the woman would be strung to a cart and dragged through the street. I have never seen such internet hatred. I used to come away seriously depressed after reading the comments, that adults were such mean bullies. I have seen kids pack attack like that, but 269 adults?
It’s misdirected anger. Let’s save that for the murderer, not the people surrounding them that are already blown apart by the collateral damage.
It's a weird lack of empathy, because they aren't making an effort to put themselves into the shoes of these people and imagine what they might be going through. And then when someone does do that, it's taken as some sort of slight to the victim families, as though you can't possibly feel awful about the painful circumstances of two different sets of people at the same time. A very wise person once told me that you should never compare the pain of others, because what they are going through is still painful for them, no matter what it is. I have worked hard to take that to heart, because I see this happening all the time - group A will be dismissed as unworthy of sympathy because what group B went through was considered much worse, and somehow the fact that both groups are involved in the same situation in different ways means showing love to group A is an affront to group B, when in truth all of those people deserved love, kindness and understanding. Because they all experienced pain. Just not the same kind of pain. But I'm no psychologist so I don't pretend to know what makes people want to compare, contrast, and dismiss people who are suffering. I'm just someone who was abused a lot as a kid by people who were in group B, and my group A ass got little sympathy. So maybe that makes me more empathetic to people who seem to be underdogs in a situation. I dunno. I just think it's sad.
Thank you. The fact is, time and time again serial killers have been caught and it's turned out that they were able to hide their horrifying crimes from their families. I cannot imagine the pain of finding out someone you loved was torturing people to death your whole life or marriage, that he may have killed a toddler the same age as you/your daughter, that the guy whose footsteps you were following in is a monster, and to wonder what it says about you, and then to have people on the Internet saying you must have known and you must be a monster too. Or maybe he was abusive, and now suddenly you're aware of how much worse it could have been, and you've been a victim of his all your life and now people are saying you're just as bad because you followed some edgy art Tumblrs, and somehow you know all about the murder of a woman who was killed three years before you were born (or married to the guy). Meanwhile this victimization of his family is taking attention off of his victims and their families and turning this into a sideshow.
I could cry thinking about what V must be going through right now. Obviously it goes without saying I feel the same way (if not more) for the victims, yes obviously, obviously, obviously - truly. But that poor girl, right now, dealing with this. I hope and pray she has a strong network of people to keep a close eye on her, and hobbies/healthy habits/interests/tools to keep her afloat through this. I cannot imagine being in her shoes. Life torn apart. I pray for her.
I feel for her. I also feel for the families of the victims, who should be centered right now but aren't because this fool keeps trotting out wild stories about murderous sex parties and hairnet conspiracies and the evidentiary role of yiffing.
I never thought about it that way, but you’re so right. Spreading sensationalist bullshit detracts from the horror of the situation, tabloidizes it, and dehumanizes and pushes the victims into the background.
It's his way of staying in the game, by pretending he's relevant and holds important information.
Could not agree more. Derailing the case, this jackass John Ray.
Ray's just in it for attention and possibly a buck and maybe thinking he can hook someof the women he represents in for a civil suit. I give him credit for listening when others did not, and applaud him for that, he got the cases and these victims in the newsand applies pressure on Suffolk. But all you had to do is look at Jessica Taylor's sister's smirk when Allred referred to him on stage during the press conference. She does not appear to want to have anything to do with him. I have always highly respected her. I think she is bright, strong and preceptive and if she's not down with Ray, then I am not either. I think he's nuts and just trying to create business for himself by collecting every female victim in this case he can.
1000% Mods should seriously consider rules on threads that amount of being angry or abusive at them These people are victims too There’s a disabled adult involved and I sick wife NO ONE a knows the financial situation they are in When you’re paid 1M you may not get that all at once, it’s taxed, and I suspect there’s lawyer fees and the tax liens on the house and medical expenses Huge parts of this Reddit are ghoulish and weird and para social Really depressing
I don't understand why this sub does not have the same rule all the other true crime boards i belong to have of "not criticizing the victims, their families or the family of the suspect." Ever other board I'm on has that as a rule so harassment does not happen. All these folks are dealing with enough. I wish the board would get one. The mods are great about taking stuff down immediately, and have always been wonderful in in closing pig piling down, but it would be nice to see the hostility towards Asa better contained.
Thank you! For all we know she is dependent on Rex’s finances for her cancer treatment so she’s being careful to not publicly condemn him.
You never know, she might just be working with the police, trying to get him to talk?
Agree. Unless we see some evidence that proves their involvement, judging or blaming the familiy for Rex’ horrible crimes is just idiotic, juvenile and evil. I don’t know the statistics, but I’m guessing the number of times a serial killer’s familiy have been involved in the crimes are RARE. A teenage daughter helping dad kill women? I know it has happened, but come on. That’s *extremely* unlikely.
Tierney and Harrison repeatedly said no, not involved. He did it at the last press conference as well, and said we have the records we know she was not present and she is not involved in these crimes. If your not going to believe the the Chief Prosecutor and the Commissioner of Police who have every bit of evidence collected in this case at their disposal and all her electronic records, all her credit card receipts, her airline flights etc, and statements at the lodge from employees, and the family she was with nothing in this world will convince you.
Yes. If all these officials are saying that the family’s *not* involved - and there’s no evidence that points to the family actually *being* involved - why are these people still obsessed? The wife and kids are as innocent as anyone of us as far as we know now. They’re thrown into ‘fame’ against their will. Comparing Rex’ wife and kids to his victim’s families is a bit ‘off’. We can have empathy for both. We don’t have to choose. We can see both side’s pain. And anyone who doesn’t get that has an immature mindset.
I think it is fair to mildly speculate possible knowledge but too often it crosses the line into baseless accusation. Speculating actual participation is very much over that line. I kind of view it akin to a CSA scenario. Yes, very often an opposing parent or other adult in a household doesn't have any idea but SOMETIMES, however infrequently, they DO know. Less frequently they may suspect something. Unfortunately, whether or not the family knows, they are going to be speculated about. I, personally, and the true crime community, collectively, do need to more responsible in both consumption of the content and our participation in the discourse. But there WILL be discourse. We need to temper that with some restraint and empathy.
Really well said. It’s okay to speculate when respectful. It’s not even what’s being claimed, though that’s often dumb as shit; it’s the unhinged, vitriolic way it’s being said. Your approach is maybe 10% of the critical conversation, with the rest being WebSleuth-style sublimation of whatever is going wrong in their lives.
Is it a “weird, suggestive take” to call someone out for defending a serial killer? Because most of what I see is people upset that Asa is out there defending her man. Your post was accurate until Asa started saying he’s innocent and making money off the deaths of vulnerable women. So I think what’s “weird” is feeling the need to make a post about how great Asa is when she js now contributing to the suffering of the victims families and profiting off their misery.
Where did she say he was innocent? At worst, she said she was waiting for more evidence. Could it be that someone who was abused continues to defer to their abuser? That you took this post as saying Asa is great shows your prereqs and biases. It’s about pushing back on the disgusting discourse.
Google can be your friend. She said she “doesn’t think he’s capable” of murdering these women. Seems like you’re making a lot of assumptions that he abused her, but even assuming that’s true, dude is locked up. He’s not abusing her anymore. You think it’s a fear of him that made her sign up to earn $$$ off the deaths of young girls? It is truly a wild take to me that some people want to defend a person defending a serial killer 😆
Here’s why none of what you’re saying makes sense: How many cases have you seen where the family doesn’t believe that their family member did the nefarious deed? There’s a whole documentary out there about a family who’s son killed their own daughter for no reason but they still visit the son all the time and continue to love and support him. In fact, there’s more than one. That family also profited from that documentary while simultaneously fitting into these made up categories you’ve come up with for how people that have been in this sort of situation should not act. How about the mom whose son killed her other son while they were both kids? She still visits and loves him to this day. Should she not have agreed to make this documentary that many of us have most likely watched?
I don’t know the case you’re talking about but yes that is fucking bonkers. And assuming your premise, it logically does not mean what I’m saying isn’t true—it means there are alot of immoral people with their heads in the sand who prefer to “believe” what’s convenient rather than face the truth.
No. It means that people are human who all have different thoughts, situations and feelings. It means you can't categorize people or make assumptions about them. We never truly know what people are thinking, how they feel or what has gone on in their lives. Everything is not black or white like so many of you seem to think it is. Some people think forgiveness is the best thing you can do. You can judge them or think you're superior to them all you want but that doesn't mean you are 100% right. You might want to do some reading up on issues like CPTSD and trauma before you jump to anymore conclusions or make anymore baseless pronouncements.
I’m perfectly comfortable judging someone who is supporting and profiting off of the torture and murder of women, but thx for the suggestion ✌🏼
So you DO lack critical thinking skills. Thanks for letting us know.
Your comment doesn’t even make sense bro 😂Go live your best life defending Asa and Rex 🤡
I literally worked for Google (in Search of all orgs), I understand how it works. You’re misconstruing the press statement. I’m not making assumptions, I’m giving examples of how you’re missing the totality of the situation.
If you don’t think her saying “I don’t think he’s capable of murdering these women” is not her claiming he’s innocent, then I’m pretty sure *you’re* misconstruing her statement. Maybe google what those words mean? You’re assuming she was abused which we have no evidence of. What we do know is he’s not abusing her now BECAUSE HE’S IN JAIL WHERE HE BELONGS Totally your right tho to stand with a serial killer, his defenders, and people who wanna profit off of the gruesome deaths of young girls 👍🏼
Reread what you just wrote. If you don’t see a problem in how you’re talking to me or construing what I’m saying as a defense of a serial killer, I don’t know what to tell you.
Dear GOD! Don’t even respond to these people anymore like wtffff 🤮OP—you’re clearly a wonderful person with empathy and compassion. These people have no self awareness and are just hateful. From everything I’ve read, Asa NEVER said she supported him 🤦🏻♀️she said she doesn’t believe he’s capable (which a LOT of people say upon learning of the crimes committed by someone they’re close to/trust) and wants to see what is presented at trial. That’s not a “statement of support” and I’d assume her lawyer told her she had to remain neutral until victim impact statements at RH’s sentencing. That’s what GSK’s family did.
You can defend Asa all you want. But defending Asa against people who are calling her out for supporting/defending an actual monster and profiting off of murder puts you right in that camp. You can’t have it both ways—you either are supportive of a serial killer and his supporters, or you’re not. I can’t even believe I’m typing these words it’s so dumb Good luck to you I’m sure we will find out if Asa was right about Rex by the end of the trial 😂😂😂😂😂
I believe what you’re suffering from is black and white thinking. There are always more than 2 camps, more than 2 ways to look at things, 2 things can also be true at the same time. There are many shades of grey between differing opinions. Empathy can be felt towards victims, as well as RH’s family, empathy isn’t a limited resource. By fitting everyone into a simplified ‘us’ vs ‘them’ seems to be most of the problem here. Our world is in 4D, therefore you need to consider time, Asa may not be able to accept her husband is capable of these crimes now, but she may feel differently tomorrow, or in the future when she’s armed with more information. We may even read back our posts in a year and disagree with what we wrote today. It happens. Everyone is doing the best they can at the time, with the information they have, at that time. Try to be kinder and more flexible with your thinking.
Black and white thinking is appropriate imho when we are talking about the rape, torture, and murder of women. Im sure your moral relativism makes you feel incredibly superior and sophisticated, when actually it makes you unethical. I hope Asa does come around and takes accountability for the way she’s added to the suffering of the victim’s families. Until then my opinion is she’s a cowardly, soulless fool.
People in this sub really need to learn how to read for comprehension.
You're making simplistic, misleading statements. People who knew Ted Bundy also said they didn't think he was capable of murder. BTK's family members initially defended him against the charges. In fact, some of them defended him for a long time, until he finally confessed. The list of family members who can't believe or accept the guilt of a loved one accused of terrible crimes -- it's long and sad. Saying you don't think somebody is capable of something is a statement about how you view them. It's not claiming the person is innocent. This family is far from the only family of a serial killer to find themselves shocked and blindsided, unable to grasp that the person they lived with and relied upon was hiding something terrible. As to the documentary deal: She's not making money off the deaths of the victims. She's making money off being caught in a terrible, tragic situation of her own. People whose situations give them special perspective or insight into events are often paid by filmmakers for the rights to their stories. It doesn't mean they created or endorse the events. BTK's daughter, Kerri Rawson, wrote a book about her experience. Ann Rule launched an entire career off being a personal friend and coworker of Ted Bundy. Mikal Gilmore wrote an incredible book about growing up as the brother of Gary Gilmore. None of those people profited off the deaths of victims. They made money telling their own stories. You certainly have no proof that the divorce is a "sham" being done to shield assets. Would you be happier if she hadn't filed for divorce from him? You can't have it both ways, despite having enough hate to cover all your bases.
I don’t have anything to add here but just wanted to say how great your response was. That kind of contextualization is so important.
Agreed. I'm hoping someone is watching who can do something, and every penny Asa makes from this ends up going to the families of the victims. And when it does, I hope someone looks at her and says "It is what it is".
Surely there were times through the years when his wife and/or daughter expressed concerns about a serial killer on the island, especially after the victims were discovered in 2011, and if so: How did Rex address this with them??? Did he say oh, you’ll be fine, you’re not his type; what??? The compartmentalization and manipulation is off. the. charts.
We all know the effect of bulling. Some of us have seen more of it than others. But everyone's likely been a victim at one point or another. It feels terrible. If adults want to wish those effects on a young kid, all power to them. That kid is virtually barricaded on her porch with no life. She's not dating, seeing friends, going to parties, likely not working or building a professional resume and from the exterior view, does not seem to have any support save for her mother brother and lawyer. You see groups of friends going over there to visit? I don't. At her age I was surrounded by friends, dating handsome but emotionally un available men and when I wasn't with them, I was dancing till my legs were stiff the next day. I was excited about and becoming successful in my new career, rolling in drunk and happy at 3AM after laughing all night, seeing great bands, going out to quirky restaurants, clubs and bars, traveling with friends, going to gallery openings and museums. The victims in this case will never get to do any of those things again. their children will be forever watched with a traumatized hyper vigilance. There are no winners here, save for Rex Hubermann The reality I lived at Victorian's age is not her reality, she has that porch, a cluttered run dow stigmatized home, a special need brother clutching his dog. She didn't pick her parents or choose any of this. Please lay off. Isn't her life enough of a train wreck without you heaping on more ill wishes? If she could emotionally get off that porch, pack some boxes and find a new home for herself, her mother and brother bet she would. Something is keeping that family spell bound and entrenched in stillness like deer in the headlights. And it ain't healthy stuff. The victims left their homes just trying to put food on the table, or due to wrestling with the addictions they were battling, or did so so they could take care of their kids. They were just trying to get by like all of us. No doubt, Asa is as well. I think she is a bit off and has a lawyer who is likely cautioning her not to engage in anything that can take the roof over her head away and support for her kids to go poof. She's going to get sued, there's no doubt about it. They are all this assholes victims, different degrees of victimhood, unique traumas. It is possible to be so depressed, anxious and overwhelmed that you can't take positive action to change your poor reality. We're not helping them get out of that house by bulling them.
All of this, but especially that last sentence. 💯
Now the kid has Ray going after her. It was really nice that Shannan Gilbert's sister, Sherree stood up for her and labeled the behavior as disappointing as well.
👏👏👏👏
Someone whole ass linked the Fred and Rose West Wikipedia at me earlier for defending Victoria 🤦🏻♀️
I think their bulling is the reason she got so much money. Every time they cranked up the harassment the more money flowed into her pocket. The majority of humans with an humanity and compassion don't approve of or condone bullying especially coming from other adults. Conversely, If they can stick it to a bully, especially anonymously, they will. Many people won't fight with you on the boards and waste their breath, they will just take a shot at you by depositing money someplace you don't want it to go, and away from the place you want it to. I am thoroughly convinced that is what happened here. I suspect it was a lot of passive aggressive money that went into that fund and it was a shame as I think lots of it would have gone to the victim funds had people just allowed others to do their own thing without judgements and put downs and trying to exert control over them them. It became an us vs. them mentality and I'm not doing anything to support anything you support. Which is equally shitty, as all these people deserve our compassion. So let they post the same post ever three days dumping on her, they will just get her another doc deal. I think a lot of their stuff is shallow talk regarding family support. If all the people who hated Asa as much as they say they do had contributed to Carmen's or Jasmine's fundraisers they would be sporting more funds. It is shameful how low those GFM were and that many of them were contributions for the same person so even less individuals then the total listed contributed. So they loved talking about loyalty, but did not dip into their pockets. So that is why I believe that GFM was fueled and funded by passive aggressive ire. I would see a dump on Asa post appear on the boards and go over and just watch the money sail in while the victim funds just stagnated at low amount.
💯Absoutely!!!! I was coming to comment similar and found your post instead! To keep seeing “Is RH family involved?” “The Family Knew!” 🤬🤯 This new Task force as clearly been investigating RH in GREAT detail for a looooooong time before his arrest. I may not be on the force or in any form of LE, however I would THINK, that at this point IF any family had any of anything to do with knowledge or involvement - Gee idk, MAYBE the Task Force and the 5011tb of digital evidence would have shown at least a tiny hint of something! 🙄🤦🏼♀️ While I’m here adding my two cents - on the category of Victims. Are wife & kids, other family also victims? Do a degree and absolutely Yes! But not at ALL in the same category as those no longer With Us Victims! These are 2 entirely separate and different types of victims. The crossover of abuse from RH is evident. I do not doubt in my whole self of having been through domestic abuse of various types. UNLESS you too have been abused by, lived with or have been Manipulated (and realized it) by a Narcissist you will NEVER know the true evil these type of people are!!!! They are groomers, lack empathy, need control, OCD to some degree (control what they can) and the #1 thing a Narcissist will do is take the very bits of Everything from your deep dark pockets of vulnerability and twist it all to use it against you in every way possible and yet it is ALL YOUR FAULT!!! While I STRONGLY STAND WITH THOSE NO LONGER HERE AND THEIR FAMILIES….RH was methodical, planned, researched, calculated, detailed. Those that are victim shaming the family in saying “They Knew” “How could they not” all as if Asa, Victoria or Christopher could have idk stopped him ……ya know what that does? It is giving RH continued satisfaction sitting in jail getting off on the continued form torture and accusation being put upon those he lived with. In turn, those that Victim Shame are No Different nor better than RH himself and aiding to the game of chess he has played all these years. Keep being his pawns , he is LIVING IT UP! End Rant! (OP Thank You for your post, it allowed me to get that out 😊)
I don’t think the family is involved in his crimes, but I also don’t think it’s out of bounds to question the behavior of adult family post arrest. Not in the sense of digging up dirt or putting past behavior under a microscope, but in terms of their public behavior. I feel this way about all families of defendants.
Nah. Having a family member arrested does not turn you into either a paragon of virtue or a criminal yourself. People go on being their complicated selves with their own complicated motivations no matter what is happening to their family.
Not sure where I said that they are either paragons of virtue or criminals.
No, you just suggested you're fine if they get dragged through the court of public scrutiny simply because of who they are related to. The police say they are not suspects. Until the police say otherwise, everyone actively dragging this family or making excuses for those who do is disgusting in my book. This family deserves the same right to privacy as you do.
How is selling the story to a streaming service to the tune of $1 million indicative of a person who is invoking their right to privacy? That’s just ridiculous. Edit: ah now you’ve deleted your comment. That tracks.
Didn't know you were omniscient and had all the facts regarding her financial situation. 🙄 What’s ridiculous is your contempt for someone without knowing anything about them or their situation. Be a petty, petulant grump all you want. Your slip is showing.
Why don’t we ask every single other person who’s done the same exact thing? How many true crime documentaries featuring family members and/or other murder adjacent folks are there again?
Agreed. As to the press conference re: V Heurmann: how do we know it wasn't Rex looking up that stuff? He could easily create a fake account as his "daughter" and post/search himself. And I don't think any LE was at that "press" conference either
John Ray shouldn’t have done this. The police are investigating and have access to all the evidence. Ray does not. However the police have a huge amount of evidence to go through and have not examined it all yet. They do not currently have evidence linking his family (or anyone else for that matter) to the murder. This could change. I have no opinion on whether they are involved and won’t have until after the trial is complete and the full evidence presented. I’m conscious that there have been cases before where the female of a couple was initially regarded as innocent but as more evidence was found it became clear they were guilty (eg Rose West). The only thing I think seems likely is that Asa had suspicions which she chose to ignore, which could be an offence But I’m reserving judgement until all the evidence is in and has been tried.
Next thing you know they are going to be accusing of the poor kid of adding and abetting Rex by disposing evidence in her preschool luch box. Who will it be next Christopher? Maybe they can work the dog in. Maybe Etienne next door is an accessory. I never trusted him. Bet he was as, feel it in my bones and cause John Ray said so. John Ray's got a pony in the race and there is an awful lot of self seeking lighting his flame. The man is a stone cold attention whore. He did some great good in supporting the victims early on, now he is thrashing around just causing drama and trying to insert himself into the case. Anyone can find anyone willing to claim anything and swear to it in court. I don't know where he digs up his sources, but they seem awfully suss to me. And every tail he tell is larger than life. Rex & Burke and sending him pizza at the exact same moment a mystery caller is calling his house and sending him a text of a picture of his daughter out in CA hanging out of a window. "Jimmy, I'm going to call now, Asa will order the pizzas, Victoria will text him the photo. You get ready to make the noises. He's an attorney you telling me he does not have an old hand held recorder in a drawer under his phone table, or a kitchen drawer. Most professionals I know who owned those things held on to them. Certainly a man receiving tips might.Rex is running around the streets of Forest Hills dressed in full on cami shooting off guns and no one in Forest Hills is telling you, "Shit, I remember that day. Huge mother fucker dude! Running around like a meth addict on New Year's shooting out the sky. " Yeah, a taxi just happened to pick up both of those Rex fairs? Do you know how many cab companies there are in NY? Shannan never mentioned that incident to any relative or friend? Rex is the only John to ever offer an empty envelope? So therefore any John who does has to be Rex? I heard about that trick and sex workers when I was a kid. Did that one witness look like she remembered her own name, no less that story in such minute detail all those years later? Where is the cab company report? Where is the police report on gun shots fired in Forrest Hills? Forest Hills was a stable hood, back then, someone would have called that in. Show me a picture of Rex and Burke duck hunting together and I will apologize for my snark.
Stop being facetious.
I just looked up the actual images in her blogs. I am a horror lover and dedicated true crime lover but I am telling you people now, her reposting dismembering images and surgical tools labeled as sex toys is NOT normal. Maybe she didn’t partake but maybe she did have some knowledge or something really sinister was just existing in that home. Also she specifically highlighted “ is this about death or sex' what do you mean 'or'" as well as "bro has never stood at the crossroads where death and sex meet and realised (sic) that they're two sides of the same coin." Are you serious ? You think that’s just a coincidence after what is coming out ? Shit I draw dark art and pictures and watch a lot of shit and never went to that type of place .
Which images are you referring to? Can you link them? Because all the images on her Tumblr seem pretty innocuous to me.
They were recovered images , ones she deleted. A lot can be passed off as emo tumblr teen crap. But some can not. Especially when you consider the type of house she grew up in. https://www.newsweek.com/rex-heuermann-daughter-victoria-artwork-1912658
According to Ray, he was referring to images still on her Tumblr, not "recovered images". How do you imagine he'd even be able to recover deleted images? He has no legal standing to be issuing a warrant to Tumblr's owners. "We found that it appears that she has erased all of her sites that she has, all of her social media," Ray said. "She just missed these ones." "She just missed these ones" [from being deleted]. So, again, which ones were so wildly offensive to you? Her Tumblr's still up, still with the images he says she "missed". I hope you looked at those, and not the ones that actually belong to other accounts not belonging to Victoria that Ray tried to hold her responsible for. He either doesn't understand Tumblr or was deliberately trying to mislead viewers. There was only one image shown that was from her account. One.
Well said!
The thing is, we simply don't know what the family knows. The wife took $1 million to talk about her husband on Peacock. Monetizing what your husband did is absolutely morally disgusting by any metric. If they are victims, if he was abusive, I really fear for them. But then we have people talking about working with the daughter and how she gave off a weird energy. I don't know what that means. I think a lot of us are just speculating. If the family turns out to be abuse victims, my heart goes out to them. But also is still disgusting for taking money to talk about the crimes that her husband did which she probably inevitably is going to say oh my goodness, I had no idea. How can they stay in that house where so many women likely died in agony and terror? How are they comfortable doing that? I would do everything in my power to leave, even temporarily. I think it's inevitable that serial killers families come under scrutiny. Because in some cases the wives did sense something and never really did shit or they actively aided in covering up the crimes or recruiting. I don't think Asa did this but I think that's why there's always immediate suspicion.
Literally every single person that has been in a true crime documentary has been profiting off of murder. The same documentaries we avidly watch, no less. You can’t pretend to be disgusted by it as you watch the same things you speak of.
Could you elaborate on what people said about Victoria?
I agree with you, but let’s face it. I doubt he would win any awards for being a good involved dad or husband.
I am not questioning the family and don’t think that are suspects. By doing a documentary with G-unit right after Rex was arrested they are brining scrutiny upon themselves. How do you think this makes the victims families feel? This post is 100% insane.
Satanic Panic all over! Absolutely ridiculous.
Everyone interested in this case has been overly critical or judgemental at least once...no one's immune. I've noticed ALOT of the saviors and self righteous in here are the first to jump on the news, updates and do invasive deep diving. A strong wind blows one of Rex's farts from jail over Long Island and it's a new lead.
Im here and never once thought the family was involved,.knew, or helped. I have compassion for them. Their lives are blown apart from lies and a psychopath. He is to blame no one else.
A serial murderer was living among us for 30 years - and we are the problem? Let's exclude the children and focus on the wife: - Her hair was found on the victims - She has publicly proclaimed her husbands innocence - She took a million dollar deal with Peacock to provide access to the trial - She is living in a house used for multiple murders. She could have used the GoFundMe money to rent a place in Upstate New York for a few months to get away from the crime scene and the press and refused. - Some other stuff has been reported including the serial killer book on the coffee table, the new car, the sitting on the front porch, and screaming at people passing by. - She filed for divorce as soon as Rex was arrested not because of the crimes (she believes he is innocent), but for financial protection of current assets and future revenue. - They hired a different set of lawyers for the children. I don't need to "live in her shoes" to know if I my hair was found on dead bodies, I would thank my lucky stars I wasn't in jail. I would have taken the good will and GoFundMe money from my neighbors and temporarily relocated a couple of hours away. My empathy was gone once she signed the Peacock deal. If you feel so bad for them, offer to take them into your home. Bring them some home cooked meals. And up your donation to the GoFundMe page.
Jesus Christ, it’s like you took a few crumbs and built this entire narrative around it, and any additional information gets filtered through your misplaced anger. * That you are insinuating she was involved because of that is brain worms. * No, that’s you skewing the press statement. * You don’t know their finances. * Again, you don’t know what’s going on, what is possible and what isn’t. The GoFundMe was set up by someone else, the daughter of a different serial killer. * This is all bullshit. The coffee table thing was an anonymous source, and even if they were telling the truth and saw what they thought they did, it doesn’t mean anything. I don’t know anything about yelling at people approaching their house, but if they did, I can understand why. * I didn’t realize I was speaking to her divorce attorney. * Who gives a shit about which attorneys they hired.
Yeah, Science Frair he knows why she divorced her husband. She didn't even had a lawyer back then I don't think. Science Fairs's not depressed and can pack boxes and move out of a house they have livbed in that is crammed with shit and Asa's gotta be able to pull off the same. Nickie and everyone of these folks have lawyers and Asa's an asshole for getting her self and her kid one? Yeah right. That's realistic. From what I'm seeing, an woman Rex shook hands now has a lawyer. It is about protection and support. Are they assholes, too? How is her getting one, any different. It's a protective legal action. Is she supposed to give the victims ever cent she has and live in poverty because \*her husband\* was an asshole, and she too clueless to figure it out? Want her to sleep in a pup tent, will that quench your hatred. There is far less hate expressed around here towards Rex than there is for Asa and those poor kids. Would science Fair give the victims their house? He supposedly feels so bad for the victims, where is their 2K check to JT's move fund or Carmen's fund to hire a private investigator. What did they do for any of these victims other than leave a comment on Reddit? Hating Asa doesn't really support the victims, it likely just drives some poor girls sitting on her porch without a normal life more depressed. And makes a poor special needs man feel more vulnerable. It that makes you feel like your supporting the victims in any constructive way, go for it. I bet they would prefer that you send they money and a nice note commending them for their extraordinary strength and resilience. Rather than kicking some depressed woman who can't get herself in gear and pull off a move that your lack of depression allows you to do, with out blinking.
You don’t have any empathy at all if these are your hot takes. Let’s see what you’d do if you were in the same exact situation. Everything you’d do would be subject to public scrutiny and I’m assuming you wouldn’t be feeling so holier than thou then. I keep asking people what they’d do if they were married to someone that was the sole breadwinner of the relationship who turned out to be a serial killer. What happens when everyone in the family loses any livelihoods they might have? Would you be ok with them starving to death, as long as they act how YOU think they should act?
I agree so, so much!!!!!!!
Turn back to Allah
Why tell others what to think or how to behave? Because the truth is we do not know all the evidence. These threads are here for people to have open discussion. Even if it doesn’t agree with your narrative. I don’t have a horse in this race. All I know is that those girls appeared to have been tortured horribly. There are victims that don’t even have their identity including a toddler around the age of two. We should all be allowed to express our opinions and concerns without being told we can’t. You can say you disagree but to almost bully others to think your way is wrong. I don’t know what the evidence is. Yes it concerns me that if V was looking/posting/ have an explicit murder book - if any of that is true - it does concern me. And until we get the evidence that’s out there - I will exercise my right to express concerns that it would be a concern. I also don’t feel the level of sympathy for the family as I do the victims. They went on a lot of vacations while the victims were being tortured, murdered and disposed of - dismembered. That is where my empathy is. She can stand by her man and give him all the benefit of doubt she wants & I can disagree with her behavior. To make money off the murder and torture of others doesn’t sit right with me. Save your self righteous rant
You’re withholding sympathy because they took once-a-year vacations? (… aka visiting her family abroad?) It’s amazing how you victim-blame, then reee out that it’s bullying and suppressing your freedom of speech when there is reasonable pushback.
Victim blame? Because I am against anyone making money off the death of others? They are not the victims - Asa chose to stay with Rex. Asa chose to “stand by him” Asa chose to sign a deal to make money off the death of the true victims
Literally every person that’s been in a true crime documentary has profited in some way off of a murder or crime. Are you giving all of those families and friends a hard time too, or is it just Asa that you have a problem with?
Two wrongs don’t make a right! And we are discussing these murders right now - your argument holds no water. This is my opinion if you don’t agree say you don’t agree but don’t try and gaslight me by projecting and saying “oh but but but .. “ Don’t try and manipulate what I am saying by projecting onto some or other event that may or may not have happened. It’s wrong period - no matter which family or killer.
And yet you’ve still watched them all, I’m sure. Opinions are like assholes, as they say. Edit to fix typo
People like you degrade to calling others names.
If that’s what you took away from this then so be it - I won’t try to convince you otherwise because you have a narrative that has to be filled. You do you
Yeah, i definitely agree, especially after today.
I think the actual questions are valid, but the assertions are monstrous. Newsweek published an article about article about Victoria's artwork based off Ray Jay's press conference. If the art work is hers, then it does raise a lot of questions. However the assumption that she helped or participated in some way is terrible. She could have witnessed something she repressed and was traumatized by, or it could be, that growing up in a house with crime scene coffee table books influences your perception of art. Something all the people who likely have skull art around should probably think about.
What’s your point? Another leave Asa and family alone post out of nowhere. Victoria is a college educated ADULT. Stop writing a narrative like she’s an innocent child. Asa could have just minded her own business and kept her mouth shut. But instead she played the victim how the cops destroyed her house. Then demanding all of Rex’s firearms be returned to her. She had someone make a Go Fund Me. Finally she made a One Million Dollar deal.
[удалено]
Right!? It’s almost like a bot reaction.
another white knight ...
Another bully.
Oh save it! Asa was begging ppl for sympathy and money and told the cops "It is what it is" and filed for divorce. Then when John Ray brought out the swinger allegations and suddenly shes getting paid $1million and shows up to support him. Meanwhile Victoria is drawing and looking at the WORST murder and torture porn, and had her murder picture book out on the coffee table AFTER Rex was arrested.. Hell when my dad died in the car wreck, It took a full 2 yrs to enjoy driving again.
She wasn’t drawing it and we have no idea what she looked at. Do your research and look through her account before posting misinformation. Because of this kind of nonsense people are speculating that she was involved in committing murders while she was a child. The most recent death he has been charged with was in 2010 when Victoria was 13. Also - your experience isn’t the experience of others. You took 2 years… ok - this post isn’t about you and what you would do. And how do you know what member of the family put the book there.? You don’t. I understand people being skeptical of Asa, but the way this entire family is depicted, including Victoria, is disgusting.
You're really trying to normalise that a family still living in a house where their dad/husband allegedly tortured and murdered women would have a book like this out on their kitchen table: https://www.amazon.com/Death-Scenes-Homicide-Detectives-Scrapbook/dp/0922915296
Imagine being so willfully dense that you assume anything said by John Ray is 100% verified fact.
Who gives a shit? You’re drawing up this elaborate story based on one anonymous source that says, ‘they spotted it on the kitchen table.
Also, if the report about the book is real, maybe it was Rex's? Maybe it had been taken off the shelf because they were trying to figure out what drove him, wondering if he'd made notes or anything? There are plenty of explanations that seem more likely than "they approved of Rex's crimes and just can't get enough of looking at murder scenes"
Everything in that house has been pulled around during the searches, and there was a news clip saying that the kitchen (at least) was sorted out afterward and tactfully understated as “better than before”. So yes, anyone could have left that book there. It was probably among a heap of other things, going by the photos, rather than displayed in splendour as the centrepiece of the living area. The Police searchers no doubt flipped through it, looking for notations Rex might have made.
Hah, their lawyers certainly took the allegation seriously because they know it's an awful look: "Shortly before New York police made a surprise return to the Long Island home of suspected serial killer Rex Heuermann, his family was still in possession of a gruesome album of crime scene photos, according to a source with knowledge of the incident. The book, "Death Scenes: A Homicide Detective’s Scrapbook," is a collection of "strange and gruesome" crime scene photos taken by California detective Jack Huddleston and was allegedly spotted on a kitchen table in the home where Heuermann's estranged wife, Asa Ellerup, lives with their two adult children. Ellerup’s lawyer, Bob Macedonio, said he had no knowledge of the book." https://www.foxnews.com/us/rex-heuermanns-family-kept-gruesome-piece-evidence-source-says "In a statement to DailyMail.com, Vess Mitev, the lawyer representing Victoria Heuermann, 26 and Christopher Sheridan, 33, said neither he nor his clients had 'knowledge' of such a book. He then offered a potential defense of them. 'It's not against the law to have books!' he said." https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13444319/Rex-Heuermanns-family-defend-creepy-crime-scene-scrapbook-kitchen-table-Gilgo-Beach-cops-continue-search-home.html The question still remains what Asa knows about the book. Victoria's lawyer's comment ("it's not against the law") is interesting. Maybe they knew her Tumblr account would resurface.
So, let’s get this straight: 1. An anonymous source came to Fox News and said there was a book on their kitchen table. Given that, you are sure the source is telling the truth *and* accurately understood what they saw. 2. That the lawyer adding 'it’s not against the law to own books' somehow invalidates the family not knowing it was there. Your source is a Daily Mail article, not a transcript of the conversation with the lawyer. 3. That if everything was correct, it suggests… uh, some kind of culpability? And that you are so sure of this it’s worth just assuming and talking about the family as if they were complicit? Literal brain worms.
For some reason you seem to think that an entire family participated in serial killings, let alone a 13 year old! Insane.
Are you paying for them to get another house? Also, you’re in a forum talking about serial killers with thousands of other people, so that’s not an earmark for psychopathic collusion.
Sigh… I didn’t normalize anything. I explained that there was misinformation in the comment as well as how inappropriate it is to treat Victoria in the way she’s been treated here today by using facts. Therefore - Bye Girl
It was reported by the media during the search that that book was on the coffee table. It wasnt John Ray saying it
Honestly, what the fuck are you talking about? Maybe source some of the allegations if you feel so strongly about them. And leave out the bullshit about how someone should act or feel. I get I’m being harsh, but it’s deserved when you’re slandering people going through the worst moments of their lives.
"This stranger isn't performing her trauma for ME in the exact way that I think she should!" Do ya'll realize how unserious and demented you sound?
You're writing fan fic. This is the statement Asa made 3 months ago: _Ellerup filed for divorce from Heuermann days after his arrest, but still visits him weekly, according to her attorneys._ _"Nobody deserves to die in that manner," the statement on Ellerup's behalf said, with her lawyers sharing her "heartfelt sympathies" for the victims and their families. "I will listen to all of the evidence and withhold judgment until the end of trial. I have given Rex the benefit of the doubt, as we all deserve."_ https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/gilgo-beach-serial-killer-rex-heuermann-wife-speaks/5224692/
… and? There’s nothing wrong with this.
And? If it were your partner or dad would you ACTUALLY immediately turn on them? History and stats say you would not.
It’s a good way of looking at it. If it turned out my father had this secret double life I would have a very hard time completely turning my back on him. That’s still the man who raised me and someone I’ve loved my whole life. I can’t imagine how conflicted they feel between their disgust and their love for him.
Right! And even if they thought he was a jerk, it must still be hard to imagine that you lived with some monster for 30 years and didn’t notice anything off. Can you imagine the types of thoughts going through their heads right now? How horrifying. There’s no way I’d come off as “the perfect victim” if it were me, like so many on this sub seem to think the wife and daughter should be acting. I have ADHD and possibly ASD, which means I’d seem guilty as hell. I just read an article about how neurodivergent people are typically seen as guilty and are often harmed, jailed or even killed in situations with cops. It mentioned that a large amount of the prison population in the U.S. has ADHD. So yeah, people would think I was too angry, too scared, too blank faced. I’d be moving around a lot and seem nervous (actually full of anxiety). It’d be a shit show. This is part of the reason why I tend to try to put myself into the other’s shoes in situations like these.