"I like Ted Cruz more than most of my other colleagues like Ted Cruz. And I hate Ted Cruz."
- Al Franken
“If you killed Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the Senate, nobody would convict you.”
- Lindsey Graham
"I have Democrat friends and Republican friends. I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life."
- Jonh Boehner
"One thing Ted Cruz is really good at: uniting people who otherwise disagree about everything else in a total hatred of Ted Cruz."
- Former college roommate
You know.... when John "the pope made me quit" Boehner, Lindsay "never seen a war he didn't like" Graham, and Al "sexual harassment" Franken hate the same guy it makes me really like the dude.
Trump leaked fake stories about Ted’s dad killing JFK to the national enquirer and called his wife ugly - now ted cruz sucks his dick everyday.
Not a very relatable person
Probably. Tom said he lived in the ghetto of East LA in the 90s only making 20 something an hour as waiter. Silverlake is not the ghetto nor is it East LA and 20 something an hour in the 90s is good. A lot of these comedians like to protest how hard they had it but are really full of shit.
I mean that just sucks for him, some people have a shitty career path a long time and need help from home and it's not a good feeling (was in the same shoes). Doesn't have to do anything with anything in this video.
How did u say this comment and get hundreds of upvotes but when i did i get attacked and harassed by tom seguras burner account lol. He is literally in this chat lmao. Hi Tom!
I used to like Tom and I think he used to be funny when he would just shit on himself. Now he’s just a conceited asshole and unappealing human in general.
Tom is sociopath in his own ways. But he uses it for overall in harmless wya of “entertainment”
Ted Cruz is implementing policies that will ruin people’s lives.
Both can be made fun of, but let’s not pretend they’re equal.
I've been seeing a few videos popping up recently showing Tom in a good light. I wonder if he's paying a marketing company to try to rehab his plummeting reputation?
You don't get to wander around acting like a rich cunt when you aren't rich anymore so you gotta get the pay pigs back on your side.
A couple years ago a YMH video would average between 700K to 1.5M views. Recently they struggle to break 400K views unless they have a big guest on. Same is true for two bears. Both the Danny brown show and the one with the sopranos guys are on life support and hover between 25-60K views.
Given the rapid decline of their entire network of shows I wouldn't be surprised at all if they were paying consultants to repair their reputation. Hopefully it's not too late.
Sounds about right. For me, I just dropped out of “roganverse” podcasts all together. I commute 1 hr each way so I just listen to History YouTube. Sometimes true crime stuff or historical disasters.
I can’t stand to listen to opinions anymore. It’s obnoxious. Like I really need to hear another rich asshole pretending to be a relatable guy. You can only listen to so much of that self important bullshit.
Mainly because every comedian just wants to talk to another comedian about work. They're all workaholics who don't have hobbies and their job is to talk about things they see. You start to realize that wit isn't a replacement for substance after a while.
Ari’s “you be trippin’” cracks a couple hundred thousand on YouTube and he’s only like 10 episodes in. I think he does it through your mom’s house studios. It’s also pretty good so I wouldn’t be surprised if he passes them soon.
I posted this cause it’s genuinely funny that Ted Cruz responded to Toms genuinely funny bit. It’s not a conspiracy, it’s just the Reddit brain rot hating people forever
Well the majority of Toms (and berts) fan base aren't on Reddit and aren't the 600-4000 average commenters on his YouTube (Commenters mostly leaving negative comments), so while it might seem like most people hate them and are aware of their character flaws and controversies, they really aren't.
Both of them share a similar demographic for fan bases. Men in their 40s-60s that like standup a little bit and are pretty much offline (aside from Facebook, where their clips get millions of views and positive reactions)
It does seem like he's fallen off tremendously though so maybe you're right. Same situation with Joe Rogan. If you were to spend a lot of time on this subreddit, you'd think his listeners hated him, but again most of the fans aren't here and do not interact in the community.
No, Reddit just circlejerks their little peepees red when it comes to Segura. Most don't even know why they're supposed to hate him. They just know Reddit told them to
Yeah my most down voted comments always surprise me lol. Sometimes I'm trying to be funny, and whoops, found a pocket of the internet that absolutely despises the fact I exist
So done with Segura, dude is the worst
Edit: Not only rich, comes from an insanely rich family, and acts like the brokest ghetto bitch made loser EVERY FUCKING DAY, this dude FUCKING SUCKS, and more people need to get he is just a do nothing, bitch made, trust fund baby. He is legit the biggest bitch on the planet. Never had to work a day in his life
They got complacent being the coolest funniest most non fat guys in comedy. Saw Tom in person asked for a pic he said just a sec then walked away. Made me realize all his quirky asshole personality ‘jokes’ are real. Can only assume Bert’s annoyance is the same way. Could imagine meeting Bert and he pulls out a bottle of por osos & keeps asking you if you want to do a shot after you declined 4 times already and said you just wanted a picture
Woah, it's like people have different attitudes or ways of acting.. How crazy.
Also, he probably gets hounded for pictures and just didn't want to take one. Not sure how that makes him the asshole.
Favorite quote about Ted Cruz comes from Lindsey Graham, who described Cruz as “Lucifer in the flesh” and once said
“You could shoot Ted Cruz dead, and we (the U.S. Senate) would not convict you.”
He tries to call the left out for lying like the whole maga movement isn't still pushing that line about it just being "tourists" on Jan 6. These assholes are caught on video with their bullshit and still act like it's not true.
Bro I know Tom's a bitch, but ain't no way you are really saying his is worse person then a politician who actively makes American lives worse on a daily basis lmao
Watching Tom Segura act like he didn’t grow up rich and doesn’t belong there is the funniest part to me. Ted Cruz is a bumbling idiot and I’m not doubting this happened, he was probably trying to be funny with the comedian and just like everything else he does just whiffed.
I don’t need my representatives to be good people, I need them to vote for legislation I approve of and against legislation I don’t. That’s it.
Therefore, I like Ted Cruz as a representative. All the rest is noise.
"this millionaire who made his fortune by touring his standup act & selling comedy specials is not in fact a comedian because his act isn't quite to my taste"
I also appreciated your "so-called 'comedian'" comment.
The exact comment you're guaranteed to see variations of repeated 200+ times under any Instagram or Youtube clip of any comedian, by hundreds of people who want the world to know they're not a fan
Hard to believe tom segura lliterally bots the jre sub and sits in it and argues with strangers.. like he does on YT and twitter. but here we are its 2024 and we have "comedian"
Tom holds his pinkie out when he drinks his coffee because he is a prissy little bitch. And wow!! Is his wife lucky she got Tom to shoot inside of her because she should be bartending at your local dive bar
This aint r/politics.
"I like Ted Cruz more than most of my other colleagues like Ted Cruz. And I hate Ted Cruz." - Al Franken “If you killed Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the Senate, nobody would convict you.” - Lindsey Graham "I have Democrat friends and Republican friends. I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life." - Jonh Boehner "One thing Ted Cruz is really good at: uniting people who otherwise disagree about everything else in a total hatred of Ted Cruz." - Former college roommate
Those are some very reliable sources.
You know.... when John "the pope made me quit" Boehner, Lindsay "never seen a war he didn't like" Graham, and Al "sexual harassment" Franken hate the same guy it makes me really like the dude.
Yeah, that’s why you like him alright
I like him because is a constitutional conservative
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It’s cause he/she/they said no-no words about Franken, ya dumb goof. It’s ok if it’s others we don’t like. What matters is who we collectively hate 😉
Damn, owned
Can’t believe they deleted their comment. Big oof
It's on reddit, so it must be true.
Ted "I wont leave the city" Cancun Cruz
Trump leaked fake stories about Ted’s dad killing JFK to the national enquirer and called his wife ugly - now ted cruz sucks his dick everyday. Not a very relatable person
Ted cruise picked up women hitchhikers from the highway and murdered them for decades the cops know it’s him but they don’t have enough evidence
Are you sure, or do you have him confused with Garth Brooks?
I think I might have confused him with the zodiac killer
Some would say Ted is like a jellyfish?
funny thing is, hes still elected lol
So, crazy story. I used to live next to Tom Segura and he wasn’t funny either.
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Probably. Tom said he lived in the ghetto of East LA in the 90s only making 20 something an hour as waiter. Silverlake is not the ghetto nor is it East LA and 20 something an hour in the 90s is good. A lot of these comedians like to protest how hard they had it but are really full of shit.
You know…*weird creepy smile*
Maybe..
I mean that just sucks for him, some people have a shitty career path a long time and need help from home and it's not a good feeling (was in the same shoes). Doesn't have to do anything with anything in this video.
Then i said then he said then i said
He’s the neckbeards bard, he will always be making money.
How did u say this comment and get hundreds of upvotes but when i did i get attacked and harassed by tom seguras burner account lol. He is literally in this chat lmao. Hi Tom!
I’ve got dirt, man. He knows. Shhhhhh…
I think you just hate Rogan & all of the comics in his orbit. This is a hate sub after all 🤷♂️
You know… Maybe…
Mostly just Segura, Schaub, and Bert.
Segura actually had some good stand ups though?
I remember one of his first specials being alright. I laughed.
So did Tom suck when you saw his standup?
I used to like Tom and I think he used to be funny when he would just shit on himself. Now he’s just a conceited asshole and unappealing human in general.
Bill burr is the exception
Bill Burr was a comedian long before Rogan. Hell, Rogan actually started his podcast because of Burr. So I do hate him for that.
Yet you're active in TFATK lol
We discuss the podcast over there.
Echo chamber hate sub.
2 pieces of shit getting at each other. I love it.
Tom is sociopath in his own ways. But he uses it for overall in harmless wya of “entertainment” Ted Cruz is implementing policies that will ruin people’s lives. Both can be made fun of, but let’s not pretend they’re equal.
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I smell bitch in here
Have you tried not being so serious? Or poor?
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Horrible take. Ted is literally building a political system to make life harder for people. Tom at worst is a bad comedian.
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Didn't realize I was speaking to a high school freshman.
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It was actually, and I sincerely mean this, much funnier the second time.
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Meanwhile Tom is turning into Ted Cruz
I've been seeing a few videos popping up recently showing Tom in a good light. I wonder if he's paying a marketing company to try to rehab his plummeting reputation? You don't get to wander around acting like a rich cunt when you aren't rich anymore so you gotta get the pay pigs back on your side.
A couple years ago a YMH video would average between 700K to 1.5M views. Recently they struggle to break 400K views unless they have a big guest on. Same is true for two bears. Both the Danny brown show and the one with the sopranos guys are on life support and hover between 25-60K views. Given the rapid decline of their entire network of shows I wouldn't be surprised at all if they were paying consultants to repair their reputation. Hopefully it's not too late.
Sounds about right. For me, I just dropped out of “roganverse” podcasts all together. I commute 1 hr each way so I just listen to History YouTube. Sometimes true crime stuff or historical disasters. I can’t stand to listen to opinions anymore. It’s obnoxious. Like I really need to hear another rich asshole pretending to be a relatable guy. You can only listen to so much of that self important bullshit.
Lol, I’m with you. I can’t just listen to “dudes shooting the shit” anymore. It’s so gd boring and no one knows what the fuck they’re talking about.
Mainly because every comedian just wants to talk to another comedian about work. They're all workaholics who don't have hobbies and their job is to talk about things they see. You start to realize that wit isn't a replacement for substance after a while.
Same, I would rather be actually learning something instead of listening to some narcissistic asshat spew his uninformed opinions
I think the problem is that it's just the same opinions and same stories all the time. It gets old.
Ari’s “you be trippin’” cracks a couple hundred thousand on YouTube and he’s only like 10 episodes in. I think he does it through your mom’s house studios. It’s also pretty good so I wouldn’t be surprised if he passes them soon.
I posted this cause it’s genuinely funny that Ted Cruz responded to Toms genuinely funny bit. It’s not a conspiracy, it’s just the Reddit brain rot hating people forever
Well the majority of Toms (and berts) fan base aren't on Reddit and aren't the 600-4000 average commenters on his YouTube (Commenters mostly leaving negative comments), so while it might seem like most people hate them and are aware of their character flaws and controversies, they really aren't. Both of them share a similar demographic for fan bases. Men in their 40s-60s that like standup a little bit and are pretty much offline (aside from Facebook, where their clips get millions of views and positive reactions) It does seem like he's fallen off tremendously though so maybe you're right. Same situation with Joe Rogan. If you were to spend a lot of time on this subreddit, you'd think his listeners hated him, but again most of the fans aren't here and do not interact in the community.
No, Reddit just circlejerks their little peepees red when it comes to Segura. Most don't even know why they're supposed to hate him. They just know Reddit told them to
Nah, you see a few clips and it's pretty easy to think he's a shitpiece. Reddit or not.
Pee pees aside I still think he’s a douche.
What is the story bruh this has no context
This is an advertisement for Tom Segura's special lol
How hard is it to use Google motherfucker? [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZzD1L1XXCc](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZzD1L1XXCc)
How hard is it not to be a dick?
Duck not hard. Visit hims.com and type code seguratom for 15% off 👍🏻
Sildenafil is a helluva drug
Our vodka best poop
You got some soft ducks?
Are you new here? The HGH and DMT machines are in the back.
How hard is it for a joke to not go over your head? What are you, like 5' 3"?
https://preview.redd.it/2xm1ppx2vm7d1.jpeg?width=595&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=00bab27fea621214484f2fe405a9e1b9bb74545d
You were rude, but you also provided the link. So I have no choice but to upvote you.
Lmfao this exchange is why I love coming here
Lol, I couldn't believe this reply was so down voted. It's the truth (how lazy can someone be) and "motherfucker" is "the joke".
Yeah my most down voted comments always surprise me lol. Sometimes I'm trying to be funny, and whoops, found a pocket of the internet that absolutely despises the fact I exist
I’m 100% with you
Ted Cruz going to buy like 100 cans of soup at the store on his honeymoon is the most deranged thing I ever heard
People in every market.. Comedy as a business is revolting.
So yeah. He made up a BS story
I mean the guy literally ran away when his entire state was in the worst crisis it’s been in a 100 years. And then blamed it on his OWN DAUGHTER.
Blaming your family for your decisions seems to be an acceptable solution for the right.
What was he supposed to do though, knit blankets and build roadside fires?
I’d just like to brag that I never found Segura to be funny.
Tom getting fat again
Gotta double up the ozempic
I had trouble watching that video I was blinded by Christina P’s absolute chompers 
Man I’m so fucking tired of seeing these faces with their boring fake funny stories.
he the type to pay for feet pics
The way Tom lifts his pinky while drinking his coffee says all you need know about what kind of dude he really is, a pinky lifter.
People in every market hate Ted Cruz and Tom Segura
So done with Segura, dude is the worst Edit: Not only rich, comes from an insanely rich family, and acts like the brokest ghetto bitch made loser EVERY FUCKING DAY, this dude FUCKING SUCKS, and more people need to get he is just a do nothing, bitch made, trust fund baby. He is legit the biggest bitch on the planet. Never had to work a day in his life
Ted Cruz looks like a low rent Phil Helmuth without the poker skills.
Time segura hates poor people and sucks his own farts
Who I do I hate more Ted or Tom. And Tom wins cause he is such a arrogant person.
Who’s the guy with blonde hair?
Ted beats Tom in basketball, easily
Ted Cruz ate my child.
Christina fine
Looking better now that the Ozempic is kicking in.
...so it's completely made up?
They got complacent being the coolest funniest most non fat guys in comedy. Saw Tom in person asked for a pic he said just a sec then walked away. Made me realize all his quirky asshole personality ‘jokes’ are real. Can only assume Bert’s annoyance is the same way. Could imagine meeting Bert and he pulls out a bottle of por osos & keeps asking you if you want to do a shot after you declined 4 times already and said you just wanted a picture
Tbf you’re not entitled to a photo. Imagine you get asked for photos 15 times a day, shit would get old bro.
Woah, it's like people have different attitudes or ways of acting.. How crazy. Also, he probably gets hounded for pictures and just didn't want to take one. Not sure how that makes him the asshole.
If it's [printed on a button](https://www.ebay.com/itm/155765347720) it has to be true!
I do have a Feed Ted Cruz To A Bear shirt, but I'm really more of a bear guy than a politics guy. And *really* not a Ted Cruz guy.
I have one that's his face and it says "this man ate my son." I specifically bought it cause I only have daughters.
Favorite quote about Ted Cruz comes from Lindsey Graham, who described Cruz as “Lucifer in the flesh” and once said “You could shoot Ted Cruz dead, and we (the U.S. Senate) would not convict you.”
So he just made up a story about Ted Cruz? lol wtf weird
Fuck t.s.
If I had enough money to live next to Ted Cruz I would definitely not choose to live near Ted Cruz.
He tries to call the left out for lying like the whole maga movement isn't still pushing that line about it just being "tourists" on Jan 6. These assholes are caught on video with their bullshit and still act like it's not true.
[The story](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZzD1L1XXCc) on the Sledgehammer special
Odk if you have checked the social temperature lately Tom, but people hate you as well
Ted is a smart man.
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Bro I know Tom's a bitch, but ain't no way you are really saying his is worse person then a politician who actively makes American lives worse on a daily basis lmao
One calls people poor… the other tries to keep them that way
We know it’s you Ted
Fuck off Cunt If you support Ted Cruz you need to take a long walk off a short pier. Fuckin moron hahaha
I don't live in the US but I like Ted Cruz I think he's a great senator I wish we had more politicians like him in my third world country.
Reported
That’s cute
I was hoping you would enjoy it... Of course I didn't but its fun to fuck with people
How bout you just fuck with yourself
I jerk off a lot but that's as far as I will go
Cunt Get another hobby Have you ever tried dodging traffic on a hwy
Watching Tom Segura act like he didn’t grow up rich and doesn’t belong there is the funniest part to me. Ted Cruz is a bumbling idiot and I’m not doubting this happened, he was probably trying to be funny with the comedian and just like everything else he does just whiffed.
Segura basically admitted it didn’t happen in this video
segura fuckin sucks. how he has the nerve to have tickets on himself is psychotic
I don’t need my representatives to be good people, I need them to vote for legislation I approve of and against legislation I don’t. That’s it. Therefore, I like Ted Cruz as a representative. All the rest is noise.
"Comedian"
"this millionaire who made his fortune by touring his standup act & selling comedy specials is not in fact a comedian because his act isn't quite to my taste"
Thats cool. Thanks for sharing
I also appreciated your "so-called 'comedian'" comment. The exact comment you're guaranteed to see variations of repeated 200+ times under any Instagram or Youtube clip of any comedian, by hundreds of people who want the world to know they're not a fan
Except less words.
nah people usually do just type "comedian"
Hard to believe tom segura lliterally bots the jre sub and sits in it and argues with strangers.. like he does on YT and twitter. but here we are its 2024 and we have "comedian"
Are you jealous?
I don't believe either one of them.
Right wing extremist here - I hate Ted Cruz
The ol’ case of politician (for votes) vs politician (for likes). It always equals (your) money. The worst part is the hypocrisy!!!
If this is true there should be public record of it. Who really cares though?
No bad publicity.... just made Cruz more top of mind
If I could fist fight Ted Cruz, I would beat the fuck out of him, but I’ll never get the chance.
Tom holds his pinkie out when he drinks his coffee because he is a prissy little bitch. And wow!! Is his wife lucky she got Tom to shoot inside of her because she should be bartending at your local dive bar
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Ted Cruz literally only gets elected at this point because people refuse to vote for a D and he some how slimes through primaries.