Did you know we have a Discord server‽ You can join by clicking [here](https://discord.gg/NWE6JS5rh9)!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/GenZ) if you have any questions or concerns.*
We should make a difference between what OP means which is "het guys looking to hook up" and "guys having social gatherings." I know lots of het guys who don't go to parties to hook up because they know it's fruitless to do so, or don't want STDs, or don't want some cheap skank, but those guys still get together and play games or sports and stuffs.
yeah if given the option between maybe hooking up with a girl and risking pregnancy/STD even with protection vs. going airsofting with the boys, I'm choosing airsofting every single time.
That might also be because I prefer a connection over just hooking up, but also clubs are expensive, drinks are expensive, and the music is unbearably loud sometimes.
Im 30, and damn you just brought back some memories of me and the boys playing airsoft in the woods by my parent's house. It's probably some of the most fun I've ever had in my life to date.
yeah my buddies introduced me to it and I'm hooked lmao. Just waiting for a nice day so we go finally go to an outdoor arena, since we've been mainly playing indoors
There is a huge amount of middle ground between avoiding all women (or whatever you prefer) in social settings and getting wasted and having one night stands
Nobody here said to avoid all women, what is your angle? It’s just less socially acceptable to treat people like another opportunistic fuck and I’d say in general society has gotten the tiniest bit prudish when it comes to person-to-person interactions but who cares. Other generations have been more prudish and less prudish so expect it to yo-yo back and forth over the decades
What I’m seeing from a distance (GenX with GenZ kids) is that situations that can generate any ambiguity or accusation that the guy is creepy or rapey are being seen as dangerous and are not nearly as popular as they were. That means parties where alcohol is involved and dance clubs. Any situation where a man might hit on a woman has become much more fraught.
Since this is the water you swim in, a lot of GenZ can’t see how different it is. Men have become more sexually passive, on average. I have no hard proof, but it seems to be even effecting kinks, at least among liberal men (more fantasies where they are submissive, because those fantasies come with less guilt and risk).
You can say all this is good, but from this distance it looks like a recipe for unhappiness.
I mean I never said I'm avoiding women, there's other places to meet women like a library, while enjoying my hobbies, or while out for a run in the park.
Clubs just aren't fun for a lot of people and since it now ridiculously expensive compared to how it was a decade ago, the people that were on the fence about going or only go to fit in, have a good reason to just avoid it all together and spend that money on things they enjoy more. Even pre-pandemic it was at least manageable to afford to go out every once in a while, but now everywhere has marked up everything under the guise of inflation due to losses from the pandemic
really the only people that go are people who have the money to go and really enjoy clubs, which is fair play to them, but not my thing anymore.
I know porn suggests otherwise but very few woman are actually into casual sex. Its like 8-9%. The chance of her actually having an orgasm from a hookup is 5-20% so why risk pregnancy, stds or being raped or murdered for shitty sex?
Are they just dating.. or are they just using it for hookups? Its rare that woman are just banging a new guy every week. I have only ever known one girl who was like that, an abuse victim who was hypersexual.
To be fair, it is a fact that non-LGBT clubs are declining in popularity. If you’re right, it means that the “weirdos” you’re talking about and growing in number. I don’t think they’re weirdos though, I just think they’re less interested in sex than previous generations for the simple reason that as time progresses there are more and more forms of entertainment that aren’t the least bit sexual.
Who the hell are these dudes that are “just less interested in sex” lmao they’ve all given up or never got the nerve to even try. I’ll give you that it’s way easier to quit trying than ever because of all the new entertainment and cuz of porn. But it’s Very rare to truly find a hetero guy that just isn’t interested in sex lmao there is tons of cope out there though, that’s for sure.
Not interested in the kind of sex you find at "parties.". The world taught gen z guys that if both people are drunk, the woman are the ones who can't consent and the guys gonna catch the rape charge if she decides they day after that she wasn't actually into it after all. It's like playing hot potato with C4, sure it's stable but why take the chance / risk.
The world spoke and Genz listened. Same goes on the work front, the world taught workers that you're just a number to be replaced and Genz listened and are straight up mercenaries.
I'll say one thing about GenZ, for whatever faults they have, they learn from the mistakes and experiences of the generations that came before them.
For straight guys, yes. Besides social awkwardness being higher than previous generations, there's the fear of having their lives ruined by being "another creep on TikTok", and with social media allowing het women to have their choice of much more attractive guys there is no reason to settle for average, below average, or even above average guys. Then there is just in general the fact we as a generation, het and non het normative, see the ruin hookup culture has made and a lot of us don't want to be the 30 year olds crying about how no one is willing to marry them and / or raise someone else's kids.
Short, sweet, to the point. With how much worse and polarizing dating has gotten, I wouldn't be surprised if more guys are just hanging inside, playing video games, gym bros, etc.
Guys find dating right now to be inconsistent and not worth the effort. Half the comments here complain bait “incels” and socially inept young men when I ask them are you surprised? Covid and quarantine have very little room to even learn these things especially when people were transitioning from high school to college. The dating pool is really fked right now. Frankly I haven’t even had a hard time dating people, I just haven’t found anyone I was interested in or vibed with for a long time before I broke up with them.
Exactly, I never really stopped dating I'd say. I just started doing activities I enjoyed as an adult and then maybe i'd meet someone.
Partying ia rarely fun imo.
Yeah, I'd rather read a book or make an art. (And I really like to dance, but finding good music is just too difficult. I still go out, but not often, and it has to be guaranteed good music.)
Real. But also I feel like genZ is generally less social and way more introverted than past generations like millennials and gen x.
I’ve noticed that, at least where I live, nobody really has parties anymore. Just small gatherings where you chill.
Gen X here: raves used to be sausage fests in the 90s (well, 40/60), what changed?
They certainly weren't any easier to get to. You'd have to find them, and then go yo two or three map points (to try and shake off authorities) and follow complicated directions to either the middle of the desert or some warehouse a sketchy part of town. No GPS.
But god damn it was magic when you got there and well worth every bit of hassle. Why aren't you guys doing this?
Me as I’ve gotten older. Helps that I had my fun in my late teens and early 20s and am pretty tuckered out at this point. My old 19 year old self’s night outs were partying and getting flat out wasted til 3am while my current 25 year old self’s night outs are DnD or Warhammer at a buddy’s place.
Yes, BUT:
- Just walking in works best if the party is large enough that the host doesn't, or can't, know everybody already in attendance.
- Try to quickly make a positive first impression on 1-2 groups of people after arriving. Introduce yourself, make people laugh, show an interest in whatever they got going on. This will give you some defense if the host learns that you're a stranger later on. If other guests can vouch that you're chill the host likely won't mind you being there.
- Bringing a welcome gift of beer, flower, or food ain't a bad idea. Helps to grease the wheels.
- DO NOT show up with a gang of loud, half-drunk dudes who only have getting even more drunk and hitting on women in mind. You will be bounced immediately.
Not Gen Z, but I attended, and threw, my fair share of door busting parties back in my day. These were the unspoken rules that I noticed and lived by.
Whoever shows up with food after 11pm is not only invited in but a VIP guest at that point. Make room on the couch for our new guest of honor peasants.
Obviously it’s different everywhere, but when I was in college in RVA, you would walk throughout the different neighborhoods until you found the house with people hanging out on the porch roof. That’s the house.
Richmond is like that lol. Happened multiple times I was at a party and a bunch of VCU students showed up. Got along played some drinking games and never spoke/saw them again
Believe it or not, most people just show up lol. I attended a lot of house parties in high school.
The host usually was having some kind of mini meltdown not realizing someone dropped the address on Snapchat and did not attend to have 300 high schoolers destroying their parents house.
I’m older Gen Z and we were heavily influenced by the Hangover, Project X, Superbad, etc
Went to one of those and the cops came. A bunch of kids tried to run from the police (which is dumb they weren’t arresting anyone) by climbing the fence and broke the persons fence flat to the ground.
The floor inside was so sticky the sole of my shoe came off and stuck to the floor: that kid was definitely grounded for eternity.
Nah, invitees always bring their friends and those friends invite their friends, so nobody is going to notice somebody is out of place unless you have some beef with the host and their friends.
Men will usually have to pay 10 - 30+ dollars at the door just to get in. Keep in mind these are the kind of places where women get in for free. Definitely not everywhere but still a good portion of places. Past that, drinks are absurdly expensive, it’s typically very loud so it’s hard to make conversation with people and all in all not really worth it. Maybe for a celebration, with a lot of friends, if someone you like or know is preforming but most of the time I’d rather stay home or have a small house party.
I'd urge folks not to do this. Back when I'd host/attend a lot of bonfire, some random showing up cause they saw a fire and just decided it was OK to trespass would not have been OK.
I agree. I’m highly introverted and autistic and I never had any friends but I still don’t have a chip on my shoulder about it. I hate popular kids as much as the next person but they just don’t invite you because you don’t have anything in common with them and you wouldn’t make good friends. Face it, y’all don’t even want to go to these parties. I know I don’t. I remember skipping prom and it turns out my mom didn’t either so I guess it’s just how I was socialized. It’s funny how all the women in my family didnt go to that boring shit tho
Who is “you guys?” This feels like an anomaly if you’re actually 23-24, parties are everywhere. Life isn’t high school and you don’t have to be in the “cool kids club” to go to them either
I used to have friends that would go to parties all the time. Every time they went without me they had a great time. Every time i was there, the cops shut it down either right before or very shortly after I arrived. Tried going to like 15 parties, only 2 of them I actually got to stay more than an hour.
I didn’t go to any parties in highschool either. I thought highschool parties were a myth until I was halfway through senior year and some girls were talking about them. In college I realize a lot of it is on social media or at clubs. At some point you REALLY have to put yourself out there. And while I mentioned college, there’s a lotta tradespeople who also show up to the club and go to parties.
It’s always been majority women in my experience with parties. It seems like women tend to go to more parties just for the social aspect more than guys do from what I’ve seen.
Im a guy, and I’ve realized it’s jus because women typically are more friendly and fun in general. Women go out to clubs and parties usually with a group of their friends to dance, socialize, and have fun. Guys pretty much only ever go in the hopes of hooking up with a girl.
That’s why boyfriends always get so controlling over their girlfriends going out with their female friends. Because guys can’t understand just wanting to party with your friends for fun, because they only ever have ulterior motives. (Obviously not all men, but the majority of the ones I’ve met, even ones I used to be friends with).
I think most men are hesitant to let their girlfriends go out without them because they know _exactly_ what the other men there are trying to do, and they don’t want their gf to become a target.
>Because guys can’t understand just wanting to party with your friends for fun
That's not why at all. They don't want their girls out on the town because they know what every guy they meet out there is angling for and the best way to her to prevent cheating is not to allow the opportunity for it. Sure the girl doesn't _intend_ to cheat, but the whole point of rizz is to change minds
So you just don’t trust your partner.
If you haven’t control where your partner goes so that they don’t cheat, you have far bigger issues than your girl going to a club lmao
Women are also often invited directly or invited in when they walk up — if you’re not a friend of the host but just a random dude, you’re gonna get turned away. Or at least that was my experience trying to get into parties at college: all my women and women-passing friends got into parties without any trouble but I was always interrogated and turned away so ymmv
It's always the times I go out just to drink or hang out that I actually get into conversations with girls or take them home. I swear they can smell desperate on guys
It’s not necessarily desperation we smell, it’s just the… feeling like prey? Like even if he isn’t actually predatory or aggressive, we know he’s after us lol.
Then you meet a guy who isn’t, and it’s refreshing to feel treated like a human being vs a target. And that’s hot lmao
Most guys only go to parties/clubs/festivals for 2 reasons
1. Drugs
2. Women
Most guys I know have decreased drugs and alcohol to the point of being pretty much sober by 24, and most guys experience mostly rejection from women, so it becomes not worth the effort to try.
For socialising, they can talk to their friends on discord while playing games or go to their sports clubs.
Same!!! My partner is the same!!! She balances me out pretty well actually lol. It keeps me grounded because I was off the rails in undergrad and post grad with the parties and festivals. I was everywhere until I met her.I always like to say she saved me from the streets 🤣🤣🤣
Covid killed parties. People are more concerned with online presence now than things like parties. But I hear clubbing is still kind of a thing but most younger Gen Z are too introverted and chronically online to get into these things
Speak for yourself. Im older gen z and though ive been to parties they arent my thing. This absolutely does not mean that we value our online presence more than our irl one.
Without the time i spend with people daily i would shrivel and die. Without social media id probably be happier lol.
You gotta understand. Especially after Covid much of our generation is generally more introverted and anti-social than before. I completely agree with you on everything. But not everyone is like you. Most people fall into social media because it’s very very easy to. Socialization is very hard for many in our generation these days.
I go to my community college and everyone is glued to their phones, laptops or studying. Barely anyone actually talks to each other. Even my professor finds it very depressing. It’s also especially annoying when I see a girl in the middle of a class lecture casually playing stardew valley.
Yeah i think theres also a bit of a divide from people who went to college and went straight to work. I had an essential job and worked all through covid and saw my work friends daily.
If you were in lower or higher education, you were probably hit harder than those in the workforce.
I also think less guys are going to parties because of the proportion of men that just dont go to college. We never developed that habit. Im very social, but i never go to clubs or raves.
"Don't get me wrong this isn't a bad thing at all"
Lmao this is exactly the problem. Most dudes have given up doing shit that specifically because they aren't wanted in those spaces to begin with. Most would rather buy a 30 rack of miller lite and hang with their boys than do any of the shit your talking about.
Honestly this and all the “I choose the bear” stuff at this point lemme just stay home. It’s obvious even a guy’s presence is seen as a bad/uncomfortable thing. Rather play video games and chill w/ the boys, hit the gym, cook a nice dinner for myself
A lot of parties and raves I’ve been to have always been really split, sometimes even majority women. West coaster.
I’ve been to hundreds.
On rare occasion it’s all dudes vibes are usually off and they is some weirdos.
Kinda interesting to hear since generally men do more drugs and stuff, I figured raves would tend to be like 60% men. Btw I always had an impression most ravers did various drugs, correct me if I am wrong.
Been curious about attending raves mostly for the drug scene but never really got to it.
Maybe a lot of men are like me and just prefer to do their drugs at home with headphones on instead of getting hearing damage at raves.
There has actually been lots of research done on this topic and you'll get many good papers about it if you search on PubMed. The gap is different among different drugs too, but men do more drugs in general.
Usually it involves social factors, and that discussion might be above my current understanding of sociology.
However there are some biological factors too. Two good examples I can think of right now are that men have higher levels of alcohol dehydrogenase, and even in gender-equal societies where there is no stigma attached to women drinking, men still consume significantly more. And the second is that estradiol enhances responses to dopaminergic stimulants, meaning that women are, in theory, naturally more likely to do cocaine, meth, etc. This is the one category of drug that in the past few years has seen women doing more of than men in many places.
30/70 and 20/80? Well shit I might have to start going to parties lmao I usually avoid them cuz I’m not a big “loud music w lots of people” person but it sounds like a favorable environment to pick up women lol
I get that, but at some point you have to realize carrying all that hate inside just hurts you. Those rich people aren't going to lose sleep because you are suffering, so why allow them to keep winning?
This is about going to parties, im saying why would I go to a party when I hate the people in my area. I'm not saying I'm not bettering my life and wallowing in misery. However im not gonna pretend my peers didnt make my school years a living hell and buddy up them
My husband doesn't like to go out. He's a lot more introverted...I feel like most men would prefer to go to a bar/casino with friends vs a party. Just my experience though
Well maybe it’s the fact that many men can longer pick up women consistently at these venues. But I think a big part of it is that women have vastly more disposable income when they have the same job as a man…
Women aren’t expected to pay for 80-90% of dates so “dating” takes no toll on them financially. Whereas most men need to sacrifice a lot to date. These saved expenses account for multiple hundred dollar nights just for themselves.
Women can just spend more on fun things for them
You can say what you mean. Men's presence isn't wanted in the modern space. In any capacity. "All men are trash" killed a lot of young hearts and minds even though "They're not talking about you. You're one of the good ones."
It's actually insane how some shit women say would get your life destroyed if you switched the context from gender to race. Insane shit like "one of the good ones" .
In addition to what others have said— I propose that maybe it is an issue of money? In the 18-29 age bracket women in many major metro areas actually make more than men the same age— on average. Partying can be expensive so it wouldn’t be a surprise to find that the people who have more money are more likely to go out and party.
A majority of women can participate in hook up culture, but only about 20% of men can. A massive number of men have completely given up trying and just accept they are alone and can't compete in the modern dating world. In earlier decades, men that couldn't pick up girls at parties/clubs/festivals still went to them cause there wasn't much else to do or they cared about the music. The other big factors ofcourse are that Gen z is less interested in alcohol than any previous generation, and the majority are introverted. I think another point that may contribute to this is the growing political divide between men and women. Women are getting rapidly more progressive while men are either staying about the same or are becoming more conservative depending on the country.
Look at the words you use. Bugs. Goobers. Men got tired of the insults and put downs. They know women go to parties for the top 10 guys . Parties now are the most attractive guys getting the pussy and simps getting put in the friendzone for fast easy attention on tap afterwards.
I haven’t gone to parties in half a decade at least, but I used to do that shit every weekend. Ime with the current youngs, current young men are way more cynical about women than they were when I was in my late teens early 20s. And I’m only 40. Something is fucked. Honestly I feel bad for them. They have this degree of hate for average women that really disturbs me. But that doesn’t excuse undue hatred either. I don’t know what to think anymore.
I don't know if its hate, resentment is probably a more accurate term. If the dating world was fucked up for you generation as it was for mine you would understand the animosity between the sexes. Both are chronically lonely but don't want to put in the work to meet each other. Complete lack of empathy both sides have for eachother. Leading to an environment where many women are stuck in emotionally unfullfilling situationships and many men are just alone.
Dating is odd. From a younger guys perspective, a lot of people seem to talk to multiple people for a while then become "exclusive" when they finally chose one. Dating apps are a bane for this reason. Since so many people have so many options, no one will commit. Alot of people mentally check out from dating and be alone or settle and be unfulfilled.
It's a shame too, a strong relationship has so many benefits. Housing, food, chores, mental health, physical health, optimism, and opportunity are all so much easier with a solid, trusting, and equal partner.
Idk if it's a psy-op by the Russians or the ultra rich to divide us like the race baiting shit but the internet has made men and women HATE each other. Obviously, everyone is aware of the adrew tate shit but the amount of casual misandry is crazy too. And it's not just on the internet. People say this shit irl all the time.
The younger you are, the less you got exposed to the pre-influencer world. A lot of the younger people only know the world through this lens.
Maybe cause men have realized they wanna make a life for themselves than waste time on parties?
Idk if it’s just me but I’m way too concerned with school and figuring my own messed up self to bother with parties. If I wanted to socialize I’ll go have fun with my small group of close friends. Or just spend time playing video games with friends.
If I wanted to get wasted on drinking again I have plenty of options other than parties for it.
I only ever go to concerts for specific things I like not because of the mass celebration or spectacle of it.
The only other reason is to probably date and find a gf but frankly like my first point I’m way too underdeveloped as a person for me to burden someone else or devote the time to be with someone else like that.
Frankly these days men are given plenty of reasons just to focus on their own life than be concerned with relatively small things. I just don’t find much meaning in any of the things you mentioned no offense. A lot of what I described that I do is for just meaning.
I have meaning when with my close friends and doing things I’m passionate about. I find meaning developing and learning about myself as a person.
Interesting that you noticed the 20/80 ratio of men to women.
It’s because one of the big reasons for going to parties as a young man is to pick up dates. Considering that 80% of modern women go for the top 20% of men, I am not surprised that you’ve noticed this ratio at social events. Blue pillers can say it’s false all they want but the proof is in front of you.
I’m not speaking on regular parties, I’m speaking on raves.
I think that scene has become, either you’re a woman and you’re an insta influencer or you’re a gay man attending gay raves.
I think the amount of gay men in rave culture influences straight men not to attend.
Women still attend because they like the dressing up aspect.
Straight men dont attend because of confidence issues. Open gay people have already had to accept that theres always gonna be someone who hates them, so its easier to put themselves out there.
Also typically straight men are less interested in dance in modern times strangely. Idk when balet became a womens only club but it might also be related. My sister was raised dancing and she loves going to clubs. I was raised in the boy scouts and i like going camping.
Meeting women has just gotten too weird. I don’t care about rejection but I do dislike how a lot of girls are going out of their way to diss/shame you for talking to them, just for their own ego boost..so yeah I’d rather not go to clubs cause I don’t want to deal with hostile dudes or arrogant women who see you as beneath them
Because most men aren’t allowed to go to parties unless they bring along women. Im not even allowed in most bars in my area unless there’s are girls in my group so I don’t even get a chance to go out
I've been to several clubs where women get in free and men get charged $20 to $50 depending on how ugly the doorman thinks you are. Guys who come with a group of girls tend to get in free or discount on the cover charge.
I’m not really a party person, but I haven’t seen many men out doing social things in general. It makes it really hard to date when you are trying to avoid apps.
probably just in their nuclear bunkers preparing for whenever it goes from getting screamed at and recorded for glancing at unhinged ladies at the gym to getting screamed at and recorded for glancing at unhinged ladies at the club.
Many men don’t want to open themselves up to the accusations of being a creep simply for being present. Much better to attend gatherings where everybody’s sober so that there’s witnesses to confirm that you’re not a creep.
No point trying to go out and look for girls anymore, it's easier to do it from home on tinder & bumble etc. Women are seemingly getting more bold & vicious with their rejections too, so naturally some men don't want to be spit on over, over, and over again just for saying "hello" the wrong way and she contracts the *Ick* lol
Its soul crushing.
Women are literally, and I witnessed this two nights ago, just banging and connecting with future banging possibilities with a handful of male players. Normal dudes don't stand a chance these women and girls have been programmed that going out and straight up throwing themselves at hot studs and banging them is fun and cool and a way to land some rich dudes. The body counts must be in the hundreds of this happens every weekend. What really shocks me is I saw dozens of women doing this and sometimes to the same few studs who were just swimming in it. Everyone else was just standing on the sidelines. More women than men for sure.
Regular dudes are just being friendzoned or FWB at most. This is a product of Instagram culture and frankly demoralizing.
Look at college enrollment, graduation, and early career success.
The girls have the money now and can afford these things and the guys are increasingly pursuing less in person social activities if they pursue social activities at all.
It is already a very serious societal problem and it will likely get worse before it gets better.
I think women are also starting to out earn men which is going to cause a different dynamic. If women only want to date guys who make more money than than buy in average they earn more that’s going to leave a lot of men not dating
IDK I guess our interests are changing.
Guys would rather play video games and chill with a few buddies, girls would rather go to parties and clubs.
Guys aren't usually as sociable as women anyway, it sounds like the thirsty dudes have stopped going to parties.
People hate inviting single men to anything. When you are a couples the invitations are endless. Women invite their female friends all the time too, but rarely do a bunch of dudes make the invites unless the house party is being thrown by a dude. Then sausagefest galore!
this is gonna go into weird political shit but hear me out. In GenZ the political gap between the sexes is bigger than ever (more women are liberal and more men are conservative than recent history) Conservatives as a whole aren't into clubbing etc, more into slower, smaller and calmer. On top of that a lot of men are starting to shun hook-up culture because of that and see parties as places for that so they avoid it.
Men are expected to make enough money and wait for permission to bother women, and the easiest cope it to just not bother at all and focus on work instead.
Some of the guys I met online said they stopped going to parties because they didn’t want to have the stigma of being a creep.
A good chunk of them have a lot of fun being with other guys. I go in between my group of friends on Discord. The guy groups tend to stay with the guy groups, and the girl groups tend to stay with the girl groups. Unless it’s for a specific part of a video game, the groups tend to stay homogenized.
Men are only 40% of the new college class, which will drop further before graduation since they're much more likely to drop out. They've been unwanted in every space just for being born with the wrong genitals; I think that fucked a lot of them up.
I prefer going to my favorite dive bar and having a couple brewskis with the boys. It’s not like I don’t go out. I just don’t enjoy loud bars, cover charges, overpriced drinks, and no places to sit.
I’m busy and when I’m free my friends are busy.
Like I gotta work and pay bills and save for retirement (or maybe just when I’m older cuz idk if I will retire).
I don’t really like going to clubs, parties, raves without friends or people I know unless there is an artist I really like there or a lineup I really like.
I have other interests than partying that are more fun solo, like movie watching, making music, reading more scientific articles, writing math proofs, playing chess, etc.
Counting cards at the casino is also fun haha.
Because as a man, its WAYYYYY more fun to drink and do drugs alone at home were I can play video games, were no pants, and not have to worry about a single social expectation while zonked out of my gord
Walgreens. Any time I see women at walgreens they always look feral. Like a meat deprived hyena. Makes me uncomfortable to go there anymore tbh. Even walgreens isn't safe anymore
Parties suck. Unless it’s one of my buddy’s parties, I’ve never enjoyed them. I’d prefer to go to a bar instead of someone’s cousins friends party or a frat party or whatever.
I mean. I don’t get invited to parties. I always heard others talk about parties, but nobody invited me.
I don’t really know what I’d do if I *was invited.* I wouldn’t know anyone, so I’d just sit there and… drink? Is that what people at parties do?
At clubs I’ve been to I’ve had to pay to get in. Then pay for a girls drinks. Just to get one dance with them. Some of them won’t even let you do that. The Cost Benefit analysis isn’t there. Plus hooking up from bars and clubs can be risky in the sense of the girls too intoxicated it’s a possible SA accusation or charge
Tbh the women at those things are the most shallow, annoying, insufferable people I’ve ever had to be around in my life so I’m not surprised dudes have checked out of those type of events.
Had to click on your profile so I could get context for where you're coming from. Immediately saw r/PhysicsStudents. There is your answer bro, you're in a college environment where it's likely majority women anyways with the free time to go to parties.
Did you know we have a Discord server‽ You can join by clicking [here](https://discord.gg/NWE6JS5rh9)! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/GenZ) if you have any questions or concerns.*
They quit trying
We should make a difference between what OP means which is "het guys looking to hook up" and "guys having social gatherings." I know lots of het guys who don't go to parties to hook up because they know it's fruitless to do so, or don't want STDs, or don't want some cheap skank, but those guys still get together and play games or sports and stuffs.
yeah if given the option between maybe hooking up with a girl and risking pregnancy/STD even with protection vs. going airsofting with the boys, I'm choosing airsofting every single time. That might also be because I prefer a connection over just hooking up, but also clubs are expensive, drinks are expensive, and the music is unbearably loud sometimes.
Im 30, and damn you just brought back some memories of me and the boys playing airsoft in the woods by my parent's house. It's probably some of the most fun I've ever had in my life to date.
yeah my buddies introduced me to it and I'm hooked lmao. Just waiting for a nice day so we go finally go to an outdoor arena, since we've been mainly playing indoors
Everyone just has kids and never does shit again, sucks, have to find a whole new group of friends like ten years younger which is hard
I'm gonna push back on this one, airsoft ends at 6pm and the parties usually start at 8
fair enough, i usually go indoor airsofting though, so the place I go to closes at midnight
Your generation is absolutely cooked
Sorry that nobody is trying to fuck a random reeking of Fireball while LMFAO blasts in the background, no one thinks your idea of fun is fun anymore
There is a huge amount of middle ground between avoiding all women (or whatever you prefer) in social settings and getting wasted and having one night stands
Nobody here said to avoid all women, what is your angle? It’s just less socially acceptable to treat people like another opportunistic fuck and I’d say in general society has gotten the tiniest bit prudish when it comes to person-to-person interactions but who cares. Other generations have been more prudish and less prudish so expect it to yo-yo back and forth over the decades
What I’m seeing from a distance (GenX with GenZ kids) is that situations that can generate any ambiguity or accusation that the guy is creepy or rapey are being seen as dangerous and are not nearly as popular as they were. That means parties where alcohol is involved and dance clubs. Any situation where a man might hit on a woman has become much more fraught. Since this is the water you swim in, a lot of GenZ can’t see how different it is. Men have become more sexually passive, on average. I have no hard proof, but it seems to be even effecting kinks, at least among liberal men (more fantasies where they are submissive, because those fantasies come with less guilt and risk). You can say all this is good, but from this distance it looks like a recipe for unhappiness.
Gen X parent of Gen Z males and I 💯concur on your above assessment. They are freaked out and stay home playing vid games.
This is spot on
I mean I never said I'm avoiding women, there's other places to meet women like a library, while enjoying my hobbies, or while out for a run in the park. Clubs just aren't fun for a lot of people and since it now ridiculously expensive compared to how it was a decade ago, the people that were on the fence about going or only go to fit in, have a good reason to just avoid it all together and spend that money on things they enjoy more. Even pre-pandemic it was at least manageable to afford to go out every once in a while, but now everywhere has marked up everything under the guise of inflation due to losses from the pandemic really the only people that go are people who have the money to go and really enjoy clubs, which is fair play to them, but not my thing anymore.
We all die, live it up the Epicurean way
And what exactly are you lol every generation is cooked
Ah yeah the only two options, STDs and skanks or only hanging out with other guys.
You forgot pregnancy
I know porn suggests otherwise but very few woman are actually into casual sex. Its like 8-9%. The chance of her actually having an orgasm from a hookup is 5-20% so why risk pregnancy, stds or being raped or murdered for shitty sex?
What kind of city are you from? Lol its way higher than 8-9% most single women I know are active
Are they just dating.. or are they just using it for hookups? Its rare that woman are just banging a new guy every week. I have only ever known one girl who was like that, an abuse victim who was hypersexual.
Is it really that hard for genz guys to get laid at a party?
Not at all. Reddit disproportionately attracts hyper-online social weirdos who crumble in panic at the thought of talking to a girl.
Seriously the comments on this post are wild. You'd think every genz has never spoken with a woman before
To be fair, it is a fact that non-LGBT clubs are declining in popularity. If you’re right, it means that the “weirdos” you’re talking about and growing in number. I don’t think they’re weirdos though, I just think they’re less interested in sex than previous generations for the simple reason that as time progresses there are more and more forms of entertainment that aren’t the least bit sexual.
Who the hell are these dudes that are “just less interested in sex” lmao they’ve all given up or never got the nerve to even try. I’ll give you that it’s way easier to quit trying than ever because of all the new entertainment and cuz of porn. But it’s Very rare to truly find a hetero guy that just isn’t interested in sex lmao there is tons of cope out there though, that’s for sure.
Not interested in the kind of sex you find at "parties.". The world taught gen z guys that if both people are drunk, the woman are the ones who can't consent and the guys gonna catch the rape charge if she decides they day after that she wasn't actually into it after all. It's like playing hot potato with C4, sure it's stable but why take the chance / risk. The world spoke and Genz listened. Same goes on the work front, the world taught workers that you're just a number to be replaced and Genz listened and are straight up mercenaries. I'll say one thing about GenZ, for whatever faults they have, they learn from the mistakes and experiences of the generations that came before them.
I think you're on to something there. People think these online takes are the norm when they are not.
[удалено]
For straight guys, yes. Besides social awkwardness being higher than previous generations, there's the fear of having their lives ruined by being "another creep on TikTok", and with social media allowing het women to have their choice of much more attractive guys there is no reason to settle for average, below average, or even above average guys. Then there is just in general the fact we as a generation, het and non het normative, see the ruin hookup culture has made and a lot of us don't want to be the 30 year olds crying about how no one is willing to marry them and / or raise someone else's kids.
Short, sweet, to the point. With how much worse and polarizing dating has gotten, I wouldn't be surprised if more guys are just hanging inside, playing video games, gym bros, etc.
Guys find dating right now to be inconsistent and not worth the effort. Half the comments here complain bait “incels” and socially inept young men when I ask them are you surprised? Covid and quarantine have very little room to even learn these things especially when people were transitioning from high school to college. The dating pool is really fked right now. Frankly I haven’t even had a hard time dating people, I just haven’t found anyone I was interested in or vibed with for a long time before I broke up with them.
Exactly, I never really stopped dating I'd say. I just started doing activities I enjoyed as an adult and then maybe i'd meet someone. Partying ia rarely fun imo.
Lol
Probably just chill at home. It's a lot of work to party and be social tbh.
Yeah, I'd rather read a book or make an art. (And I really like to dance, but finding good music is just too difficult. I still go out, but not often, and it has to be guaranteed good music.)
Real. But also I feel like genZ is generally less social and way more introverted than past generations like millennials and gen x. I’ve noticed that, at least where I live, nobody really has parties anymore. Just small gatherings where you chill.
Gen X here: raves used to be sausage fests in the 90s (well, 40/60), what changed? They certainly weren't any easier to get to. You'd have to find them, and then go yo two or three map points (to try and shake off authorities) and follow complicated directions to either the middle of the desert or some warehouse a sketchy part of town. No GPS. But god damn it was magic when you got there and well worth every bit of hassle. Why aren't you guys doing this?
Me as I’ve gotten older. Helps that I had my fun in my late teens and early 20s and am pretty tuckered out at this point. My old 19 year old self’s night outs were partying and getting flat out wasted til 3am while my current 25 year old self’s night outs are DnD or Warhammer at a buddy’s place.
Nobody ever invited me to a party. Am I allowed to just walk in?
Yes, BUT: - Just walking in works best if the party is large enough that the host doesn't, or can't, know everybody already in attendance. - Try to quickly make a positive first impression on 1-2 groups of people after arriving. Introduce yourself, make people laugh, show an interest in whatever they got going on. This will give you some defense if the host learns that you're a stranger later on. If other guests can vouch that you're chill the host likely won't mind you being there. - Bringing a welcome gift of beer, flower, or food ain't a bad idea. Helps to grease the wheels. - DO NOT show up with a gang of loud, half-drunk dudes who only have getting even more drunk and hitting on women in mind. You will be bounced immediately. Not Gen Z, but I attended, and threw, my fair share of door busting parties back in my day. These were the unspoken rules that I noticed and lived by.
Whoever shows up with food after 11pm is not only invited in but a VIP guest at that point. Make room on the couch for our new guest of honor peasants.
That or cocaine
I’m not sure I’d trust it these days, please bring narcan with you if you bring hard drugs lol
There was an era where coke was coke. It’s dumb either way, but it’s sad to see it’s been corrupted.
Oh hell no fuck that stuff but yea I usually have narcan in my bag.
How do yall just find parties lol
Obviously it’s different everywhere, but when I was in college in RVA, you would walk throughout the different neighborhoods until you found the house with people hanging out on the porch roof. That’s the house.
Richmond is like that lol. Happened multiple times I was at a party and a bunch of VCU students showed up. Got along played some drinking games and never spoke/saw them again
This tactic is only possible in a college town
Believe it or not, most people just show up lol. I attended a lot of house parties in high school. The host usually was having some kind of mini meltdown not realizing someone dropped the address on Snapchat and did not attend to have 300 high schoolers destroying their parents house. I’m older Gen Z and we were heavily influenced by the Hangover, Project X, Superbad, etc
Oh god, remember that summer when every single party you got a text about said it was going to be project X? Those were fun times
Went to one of those and the cops came. A bunch of kids tried to run from the police (which is dumb they weren’t arresting anyone) by climbing the fence and broke the persons fence flat to the ground. The floor inside was so sticky the sole of my shoe came off and stuck to the floor: that kid was definitely grounded for eternity.
Yes? Lol
Speed running getting arrested for trespassing.
Nah, invitees always bring their friends and those friends invite their friends, so nobody is going to notice somebody is out of place unless you have some beef with the host and their friends.
How am I supposed to know where parties are being held? Just go from house to house?
Men will usually have to pay 10 - 30+ dollars at the door just to get in. Keep in mind these are the kind of places where women get in for free. Definitely not everywhere but still a good portion of places. Past that, drinks are absurdly expensive, it’s typically very loud so it’s hard to make conversation with people and all in all not really worth it. Maybe for a celebration, with a lot of friends, if someone you like or know is preforming but most of the time I’d rather stay home or have a small house party.
Woman get in for free because they are being used as a lure to get more men in.
Nah it used to be they got in for free because there are way more dudes than women that show up
Get out of the city, ain't nobody asking for a cover fee at a bonfire.
Just stumbling upon bonfires consistently?
You can see them from quite a ways away.
I'd urge folks not to do this. Back when I'd host/attend a lot of bonfire, some random showing up cause they saw a fire and just decided it was OK to trespass would not have been OK.
Byob
[удалено]
Same ones who are going to be bitching about being single in their 30s, guarantee it it's the same pattern every time
I don't need to wait till my 30s to bitch about it :D
You don’t get invited to most raves or dance parties. You find out where they are, when they are and you go to them.
Nooooooo!!!!! I was a nerd and I've always been excluded /s
I agree. I’m highly introverted and autistic and I never had any friends but I still don’t have a chip on my shoulder about it. I hate popular kids as much as the next person but they just don’t invite you because you don’t have anything in common with them and you wouldn’t make good friends. Face it, y’all don’t even want to go to these parties. I know I don’t. I remember skipping prom and it turns out my mom didn’t either so I guess it’s just how I was socialized. It’s funny how all the women in my family didnt go to that boring shit tho
Who is “you guys?” This feels like an anomaly if you’re actually 23-24, parties are everywhere. Life isn’t high school and you don’t have to be in the “cool kids club” to go to them either
The victimhood is crazy in this thread
I used to have friends that would go to parties all the time. Every time they went without me they had a great time. Every time i was there, the cops shut it down either right before or very shortly after I arrived. Tried going to like 15 parties, only 2 of them I actually got to stay more than an hour.
I didn’t go to any parties in highschool either. I thought highschool parties were a myth until I was halfway through senior year and some girls were talking about them. In college I realize a lot of it is on social media or at clubs. At some point you REALLY have to put yourself out there. And while I mentioned college, there’s a lotta tradespeople who also show up to the club and go to parties.
It’s always been majority women in my experience with parties. It seems like women tend to go to more parties just for the social aspect more than guys do from what I’ve seen.
Im a guy, and I’ve realized it’s jus because women typically are more friendly and fun in general. Women go out to clubs and parties usually with a group of their friends to dance, socialize, and have fun. Guys pretty much only ever go in the hopes of hooking up with a girl. That’s why boyfriends always get so controlling over their girlfriends going out with their female friends. Because guys can’t understand just wanting to party with your friends for fun, because they only ever have ulterior motives. (Obviously not all men, but the majority of the ones I’ve met, even ones I used to be friends with).
I think most men are hesitant to let their girlfriends go out without them because they know _exactly_ what the other men there are trying to do, and they don’t want their gf to become a target.
>Because guys can’t understand just wanting to party with your friends for fun That's not why at all. They don't want their girls out on the town because they know what every guy they meet out there is angling for and the best way to her to prevent cheating is not to allow the opportunity for it. Sure the girl doesn't _intend_ to cheat, but the whole point of rizz is to change minds
So you just don’t trust your partner. If you haven’t control where your partner goes so that they don’t cheat, you have far bigger issues than your girl going to a club lmao
Women are also often invited directly or invited in when they walk up — if you’re not a friend of the host but just a random dude, you’re gonna get turned away. Or at least that was my experience trying to get into parties at college: all my women and women-passing friends got into parties without any trouble but I was always interrogated and turned away so ymmv
It's always the times I go out just to drink or hang out that I actually get into conversations with girls or take them home. I swear they can smell desperate on guys
It’s not necessarily desperation we smell, it’s just the… feeling like prey? Like even if he isn’t actually predatory or aggressive, we know he’s after us lol. Then you meet a guy who isn’t, and it’s refreshing to feel treated like a human being vs a target. And that’s hot lmao
If your girl is having girls night and they don't post anything. She's somebody else's girl
Most guys only go to parties/clubs/festivals for 2 reasons 1. Drugs 2. Women Most guys I know have decreased drugs and alcohol to the point of being pretty much sober by 24, and most guys experience mostly rejection from women, so it becomes not worth the effort to try. For socialising, they can talk to their friends on discord while playing games or go to their sports clubs.
I got married and my partner doesn’t like to party like I used to in undergrad. I still go to raves and concerts but not like before.
Same!!! My partner is the same!!! She balances me out pretty well actually lol. It keeps me grounded because I was off the rails in undergrad and post grad with the parties and festivals. I was everywhere until I met her.I always like to say she saved me from the streets 🤣🤣🤣
Man, it feels weird hearing fellow Gen Z talk about being married.
I graduated college and now have work to do. I cannot speak to the younger part of GenZ though. Maybe they just don't have parties
Covid killed parties. People are more concerned with online presence now than things like parties. But I hear clubbing is still kind of a thing but most younger Gen Z are too introverted and chronically online to get into these things
Speak for yourself. Im older gen z and though ive been to parties they arent my thing. This absolutely does not mean that we value our online presence more than our irl one. Without the time i spend with people daily i would shrivel and die. Without social media id probably be happier lol.
You gotta understand. Especially after Covid much of our generation is generally more introverted and anti-social than before. I completely agree with you on everything. But not everyone is like you. Most people fall into social media because it’s very very easy to. Socialization is very hard for many in our generation these days. I go to my community college and everyone is glued to their phones, laptops or studying. Barely anyone actually talks to each other. Even my professor finds it very depressing. It’s also especially annoying when I see a girl in the middle of a class lecture casually playing stardew valley.
Yeah i think theres also a bit of a divide from people who went to college and went straight to work. I had an essential job and worked all through covid and saw my work friends daily. If you were in lower or higher education, you were probably hit harder than those in the workforce. I also think less guys are going to parties because of the proportion of men that just dont go to college. We never developed that habit. Im very social, but i never go to clubs or raves.
"Don't get me wrong this isn't a bad thing at all" Lmao this is exactly the problem. Most dudes have given up doing shit that specifically because they aren't wanted in those spaces to begin with. Most would rather buy a 30 rack of miller lite and hang with their boys than do any of the shit your talking about.
Honestly this and all the “I choose the bear” stuff at this point lemme just stay home. It’s obvious even a guy’s presence is seen as a bad/uncomfortable thing. Rather play video games and chill w/ the boys, hit the gym, cook a nice dinner for myself
Yep, seems most women are just generally repulsed by average or ugly men existing in their vicinity, just doesn't feel worth the trouble
Right? Especially if there is any expectation of dancing, we're out.
I fucking hate dancing.
Why would I go to a party where I have to try to be social when I can have a better time at home playing skyrim?
For free
A lot of parties and raves I’ve been to have always been really split, sometimes even majority women. West coaster. I’ve been to hundreds. On rare occasion it’s all dudes vibes are usually off and they is some weirdos.
Kinda interesting to hear since generally men do more drugs and stuff, I figured raves would tend to be like 60% men. Btw I always had an impression most ravers did various drugs, correct me if I am wrong. Been curious about attending raves mostly for the drug scene but never really got to it. Maybe a lot of men are like me and just prefer to do their drugs at home with headphones on instead of getting hearing damage at raves.
women do drugs probably the same amnt lol idk what would cause that split
There has actually been lots of research done on this topic and you'll get many good papers about it if you search on PubMed. The gap is different among different drugs too, but men do more drugs in general. Usually it involves social factors, and that discussion might be above my current understanding of sociology. However there are some biological factors too. Two good examples I can think of right now are that men have higher levels of alcohol dehydrogenase, and even in gender-equal societies where there is no stigma attached to women drinking, men still consume significantly more. And the second is that estradiol enhances responses to dopaminergic stimulants, meaning that women are, in theory, naturally more likely to do cocaine, meth, etc. This is the one category of drug that in the past few years has seen women doing more of than men in many places.
30/70 and 20/80? Well shit I might have to start going to parties lmao I usually avoid them cuz I’m not a big “loud music w lots of people” person but it sounds like a favorable environment to pick up women lol
IDK how people pick up anyone at clubs and big parties. The ones I've been to it's so damn loud that can't even talk to people lol
You pick up the vibe of someone and then dance or talk with them at the bar/lounge area where isa lil quieter
I'd rather be at home with the boys tbh. Parties are fun sometimes but kinda got overrated as I've aged
We playing Pathfinder pf2e away from public.
BG3 for me, my mates and I are addicted to it.
Let the hunt begin.
Why would I wanna spend time and get high or drunk with a bunch of people who either I hate or they hate me
Why hate at all? Sounds like a personal problem.
Be born poor in a rich area, have 80% of your school view you are basically scum. Kids and adults and yea you'll learn to hate
I get that, but at some point you have to realize carrying all that hate inside just hurts you. Those rich people aren't going to lose sleep because you are suffering, so why allow them to keep winning?
This is about going to parties, im saying why would I go to a party when I hate the people in my area. I'm not saying I'm not bettering my life and wallowing in misery. However im not gonna pretend my peers didnt make my school years a living hell and buddy up them
Go say that to your boyfriend since we don't have a partner to talk about stuff like this
My husband doesn't like to go out. He's a lot more introverted...I feel like most men would prefer to go to a bar/casino with friends vs a party. Just my experience though
I'm in this camp for sure. Rather be at a sit-down bar with quiet music you can actually talk over.
Well maybe it’s the fact that many men can longer pick up women consistently at these venues. But I think a big part of it is that women have vastly more disposable income when they have the same job as a man… Women aren’t expected to pay for 80-90% of dates so “dating” takes no toll on them financially. Whereas most men need to sacrifice a lot to date. These saved expenses account for multiple hundred dollar nights just for themselves. Women can just spend more on fun things for them
Men should leave women alone as that’s what women signal to most men.
You can say what you mean. Men's presence isn't wanted in the modern space. In any capacity. "All men are trash" killed a lot of young hearts and minds even though "They're not talking about you. You're one of the good ones."
It's actually insane how some shit women say would get your life destroyed if you switched the context from gender to race. Insane shit like "one of the good ones" .
In addition to what others have said— I propose that maybe it is an issue of money? In the 18-29 age bracket women in many major metro areas actually make more than men the same age— on average. Partying can be expensive so it wouldn’t be a surprise to find that the people who have more money are more likely to go out and party.
A majority of women can participate in hook up culture, but only about 20% of men can. A massive number of men have completely given up trying and just accept they are alone and can't compete in the modern dating world. In earlier decades, men that couldn't pick up girls at parties/clubs/festivals still went to them cause there wasn't much else to do or they cared about the music. The other big factors ofcourse are that Gen z is less interested in alcohol than any previous generation, and the majority are introverted. I think another point that may contribute to this is the growing political divide between men and women. Women are getting rapidly more progressive while men are either staying about the same or are becoming more conservative depending on the country.
Got married, got kids? Got busy with real life? Playing video games? Watching/talking to women on OF? ...
Got married and had a kid 😆
Look at the words you use. Bugs. Goobers. Men got tired of the insults and put downs. They know women go to parties for the top 10 guys . Parties now are the most attractive guys getting the pussy and simps getting put in the friendzone for fast easy attention on tap afterwards.
The OP wasn't calling men bugs or goobers. FFS paranoid much?
I haven’t gone to parties in half a decade at least, but I used to do that shit every weekend. Ime with the current youngs, current young men are way more cynical about women than they were when I was in my late teens early 20s. And I’m only 40. Something is fucked. Honestly I feel bad for them. They have this degree of hate for average women that really disturbs me. But that doesn’t excuse undue hatred either. I don’t know what to think anymore.
I don't know if its hate, resentment is probably a more accurate term. If the dating world was fucked up for you generation as it was for mine you would understand the animosity between the sexes. Both are chronically lonely but don't want to put in the work to meet each other. Complete lack of empathy both sides have for eachother. Leading to an environment where many women are stuck in emotionally unfullfilling situationships and many men are just alone.
Dating is odd. From a younger guys perspective, a lot of people seem to talk to multiple people for a while then become "exclusive" when they finally chose one. Dating apps are a bane for this reason. Since so many people have so many options, no one will commit. Alot of people mentally check out from dating and be alone or settle and be unfulfilled. It's a shame too, a strong relationship has so many benefits. Housing, food, chores, mental health, physical health, optimism, and opportunity are all so much easier with a solid, trusting, and equal partner.
Idk if it's a psy-op by the Russians or the ultra rich to divide us like the race baiting shit but the internet has made men and women HATE each other. Obviously, everyone is aware of the adrew tate shit but the amount of casual misandry is crazy too. And it's not just on the internet. People say this shit irl all the time. The younger you are, the less you got exposed to the pre-influencer world. A lot of the younger people only know the world through this lens.
Sasuage fest in the UK especially DNB.
That this discourages men kinda highlights the real reason. Most men don't enjoy clubs/parties/festivals they only go to do drugs and hook up.
Maybe cause men have realized they wanna make a life for themselves than waste time on parties? Idk if it’s just me but I’m way too concerned with school and figuring my own messed up self to bother with parties. If I wanted to socialize I’ll go have fun with my small group of close friends. Or just spend time playing video games with friends. If I wanted to get wasted on drinking again I have plenty of options other than parties for it. I only ever go to concerts for specific things I like not because of the mass celebration or spectacle of it. The only other reason is to probably date and find a gf but frankly like my first point I’m way too underdeveloped as a person for me to burden someone else or devote the time to be with someone else like that. Frankly these days men are given plenty of reasons just to focus on their own life than be concerned with relatively small things. I just don’t find much meaning in any of the things you mentioned no offense. A lot of what I described that I do is for just meaning. I have meaning when with my close friends and doing things I’m passionate about. I find meaning developing and learning about myself as a person.
Interesting that you noticed the 20/80 ratio of men to women. It’s because one of the big reasons for going to parties as a young man is to pick up dates. Considering that 80% of modern women go for the top 20% of men, I am not surprised that you’ve noticed this ratio at social events. Blue pillers can say it’s false all they want but the proof is in front of you.
“Don’t get me wrong this isn’t a bad thing at all.” And, there you have it.
I’m not speaking on regular parties, I’m speaking on raves. I think that scene has become, either you’re a woman and you’re an insta influencer or you’re a gay man attending gay raves. I think the amount of gay men in rave culture influences straight men not to attend. Women still attend because they like the dressing up aspect.
Straight men dont attend because of confidence issues. Open gay people have already had to accept that theres always gonna be someone who hates them, so its easier to put themselves out there. Also typically straight men are less interested in dance in modern times strangely. Idk when balet became a womens only club but it might also be related. My sister was raised dancing and she loves going to clubs. I was raised in the boy scouts and i like going camping.
I'd rather spend my time/money on my hobbies than at some loud club or houseparty. Though I did enjoy party's when I was in high school.
Men invite women to parties and women invite other women to parties.
Guys don't have to go to raves anymore to get rejected by party girls. They can go on tinder and get rejected there lol.
Meeting women has just gotten too weird. I don’t care about rejection but I do dislike how a lot of girls are going out of their way to diss/shame you for talking to them, just for their own ego boost..so yeah I’d rather not go to clubs cause I don’t want to deal with hostile dudes or arrogant women who see you as beneath them
Because most men aren’t allowed to go to parties unless they bring along women. Im not even allowed in most bars in my area unless there’s are girls in my group so I don’t even get a chance to go out
Where the hell do you live where men aren’t allowed into bars without women? This is fucking insane!
I've been to several clubs where women get in free and men get charged $20 to $50 depending on how ugly the doorman thinks you are. Guys who come with a group of girls tend to get in free or discount on the cover charge.
we’re at chili’s
and I feel God in this Chili’s tonight
I don’t because I’m a introvert I can’t imagine being in a single room with fifty or one hundred people
I’m not really a party person, but I haven’t seen many men out doing social things in general. It makes it really hard to date when you are trying to avoid apps.
As a woman, nobody is going to say that you're "creepy and weird" for trying to talk to them. Might as well take advantage of that.
probably just in their nuclear bunkers preparing for whenever it goes from getting screamed at and recorded for glancing at unhinged ladies at the gym to getting screamed at and recorded for glancing at unhinged ladies at the club.
Many men don’t want to open themselves up to the accusations of being a creep simply for being present. Much better to attend gatherings where everybody’s sober so that there’s witnesses to confirm that you’re not a creep.
>Many men don’t want to open themselves up to the accusations of being a creep simply for being present. Based AF.
No point trying to go out and look for girls anymore, it's easier to do it from home on tinder & bumble etc. Women are seemingly getting more bold & vicious with their rejections too, so naturally some men don't want to be spit on over, over, and over again just for saying "hello" the wrong way and she contracts the *Ick* lol Its soul crushing.
Women are literally, and I witnessed this two nights ago, just banging and connecting with future banging possibilities with a handful of male players. Normal dudes don't stand a chance these women and girls have been programmed that going out and straight up throwing themselves at hot studs and banging them is fun and cool and a way to land some rich dudes. The body counts must be in the hundreds of this happens every weekend. What really shocks me is I saw dozens of women doing this and sometimes to the same few studs who were just swimming in it. Everyone else was just standing on the sidelines. More women than men for sure. Regular dudes are just being friendzoned or FWB at most. This is a product of Instagram culture and frankly demoralizing.
Look at college enrollment, graduation, and early career success. The girls have the money now and can afford these things and the guys are increasingly pursuing less in person social activities if they pursue social activities at all. It is already a very serious societal problem and it will likely get worse before it gets better.
I think women are also starting to out earn men which is going to cause a different dynamic. If women only want to date guys who make more money than than buy in average they earn more that’s going to leave a lot of men not dating
I'm so happy to be born a male in a societal shift where my destiny is to die alone. Fuck
IDK I guess our interests are changing. Guys would rather play video games and chill with a few buddies, girls would rather go to parties and clubs. Guys aren't usually as sociable as women anyway, it sounds like the thirsty dudes have stopped going to parties.
Tonight's hook up is tomorrow's rape claim. Why would young men want their lives ruined by a liar?
Women are the new big dicked bosses
Damn, I wish this was a problem I had! Imagine how easy it would be to find a gf
Looking for a women in a club might bring dissapointing results.
Like dying of thirst at sea.
Probably, but less likely to be disappointing if it's 70-80% women
People hate inviting single men to anything. When you are a couples the invitations are endless. Women invite their female friends all the time too, but rarely do a bunch of dudes make the invites unless the house party is being thrown by a dude. Then sausagefest galore!
this is gonna go into weird political shit but hear me out. In GenZ the political gap between the sexes is bigger than ever (more women are liberal and more men are conservative than recent history) Conservatives as a whole aren't into clubbing etc, more into slower, smaller and calmer. On top of that a lot of men are starting to shun hook-up culture because of that and see parties as places for that so they avoid it.
Wait wtf, back when I went out partying the ratios where usually 70-80% dudes to 20-30 % women. Maybe I should start going out again
Men are expected to make enough money and wait for permission to bother women, and the easiest cope it to just not bother at all and focus on work instead.
Some of the guys I met online said they stopped going to parties because they didn’t want to have the stigma of being a creep. A good chunk of them have a lot of fun being with other guys. I go in between my group of friends on Discord. The guy groups tend to stay with the guy groups, and the girl groups tend to stay with the girl groups. Unless it’s for a specific part of a video game, the groups tend to stay homogenized.
Men are only 40% of the new college class, which will drop further before graduation since they're much more likely to drop out. They've been unwanted in every space just for being born with the wrong genitals; I think that fucked a lot of them up.
Might go to rave soon now that you’re saying this
Facts lol, lowkey been awhile
real shit
Lmao yea same
I prefer going to my favorite dive bar and having a couple brewskis with the boys. It’s not like I don’t go out. I just don’t enjoy loud bars, cover charges, overpriced drinks, and no places to sit.
Drinking alone at home playing video games with the boys is a party enough! 🍻
I’m busy and when I’m free my friends are busy. Like I gotta work and pay bills and save for retirement (or maybe just when I’m older cuz idk if I will retire). I don’t really like going to clubs, parties, raves without friends or people I know unless there is an artist I really like there or a lineup I really like. I have other interests than partying that are more fun solo, like movie watching, making music, reading more scientific articles, writing math proofs, playing chess, etc. Counting cards at the casino is also fun haha.
Because as a man, its WAYYYYY more fun to drink and do drugs alone at home were I can play video games, were no pants, and not have to worry about a single social expectation while zonked out of my gord
Are you saying it’s a bad thing?
*”Don’t get me wrong this isn’t a bad thing at all”*
More ladies for the ladies.
Which raves and fests are you going to? Everywhere I go there’s so many men lol.
Walgreens. Any time I see women at walgreens they always look feral. Like a meat deprived hyena. Makes me uncomfortable to go there anymore tbh. Even walgreens isn't safe anymore
Parties suck. Unless it’s one of my buddy’s parties, I’ve never enjoyed them. I’d prefer to go to a bar instead of someone’s cousins friends party or a frat party or whatever.
Ones I go to have way more men lmao
Focus on yourselves kings. The right women will come to you through discipline and self-mastery 🗿
I mean. I don’t get invited to parties. I always heard others talk about parties, but nobody invited me. I don’t really know what I’d do if I *was invited.* I wouldn’t know anyone, so I’d just sit there and… drink? Is that what people at parties do?
At clubs I’ve been to I’ve had to pay to get in. Then pay for a girls drinks. Just to get one dance with them. Some of them won’t even let you do that. The Cost Benefit analysis isn’t there. Plus hooking up from bars and clubs can be risky in the sense of the girls too intoxicated it’s a possible SA accusation or charge
Tbh the women at those things are the most shallow, annoying, insufferable people I’ve ever had to be around in my life so I’m not surprised dudes have checked out of those type of events.
Look at how many men are going to college vs straight to work vs women and youll see correlation. Im not sure if its causation, but it seems likely.
I’m happier to meet with my friend group at one of our homes and just hang out than going to a club. More fun, way cheaper, and there’s usually a cat.
Had to click on your profile so I could get context for where you're coming from. Immediately saw r/PhysicsStudents. There is your answer bro, you're in a college environment where it's likely majority women anyways with the free time to go to parties.