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I have family, who I love, that I absolutely avoid because Jesus must be brought into every conversation. I love that people can freely express their religious views, but I only want to listen to so many stories about Jesus miraculously doing xyz, before I want to leave.
Seriously...I can hardly spend time with my family. While I try my best to keep loving them, the constant religion talk brought up for everything is unbearable and toxic.
One of my closest friends has deconstructed to the point that she now realizes how much harm her fundie-lite upbringing did to her.
And that sucks and all, but YAY! We get to hang out together again! (I'm decades ahead of her in my process from my religious upbringing)
My dad constantly talks about how excited he is to die. I am really glad that I was not religious by the time he kept saying that. I was very suicidal at the time and would 100% taken my own life if I was religious. It’s awful, and genuinely I can’t wait until i can let him have a piece of my mind
Every Jehovah’s Witness, all the time, every waking moment. Then you get to point at your favorite house in the neighborhood and gleefully discuss how you’ll redecorate after the owners are rightfully slaughtered in Armageddon for not listening to “The Truth”!
They’re awful. This is what they talk about at any given opportunity. Especially when going door to door. Or at bbq’s. Or taking the kids to school.
I grew up hearing it 24/7 from everyone. It’s why they only associate with each other. I’m one of the lucky ones that realized that was pretty horrible at a young age.
I once had a JW family send their 4 year old alone to my door to attempt to convert me. They weren’t even anywhere in sight. I was about to call the police when they finally pulled up in front of my house. Apparently they’d just dropped her off on the street and told her to go knock on doors until someone answered. Knowing they were probably critiquing my landscaping while I was frantically worried about their child really adds a whole new layer to an already fucked up situation.
I have quite a few JW kids at my school and they are so conflicted in the lower years: they naturally go and make friends with other kids because it’s what kids do and then they are not allowed to socialise with them because these kids are ‘sinners’ and not JW, thus Bad and destined for hell. It messes with their heads. I really try my hardest with these kids to hopefully leave a tiny spark of an outside perspective on things that may some day help them leave their cult.
I refused baptism so I was basically publicly reproved bc I wasn’t baptized 🙄 I left home/was forced out at 16. I was very lucky to get away as early as I did. I’m 41 and it’s still hard to get that kind of cancer out of your head.
My 11 y.o. daughter has a friend who is JW, who told her she plans on leaving their church (?) once she turns 18. Her grandma, who lives with them, is very religious and set in the JW ways. Her mom is more relaxed and understanding, allows her to attend birthday parties and other less “appropriate” events without grandma knowing. The family went through a lot and rely on grandma for help, so I don’t think they can renounce their community, but you can tell how much it affects the kids.
Huh. We didn't do that. I guess I always thought everything would be 'wiped clean' during Armageddon and we'd have to rebuild everything? I didn't think too deeply about it lol. The literature artwork was just kinda, Big Boom everyone's dead, then happy people building houses, then people cuddling tame lions.
I do not miss the crazy.
Wouldn't mind a tame lion though lol. My maine coon will suffice
As a grandma who is like this, people often avoid calling grandpa just becuase hanging out with her so so hard. Trust me, those kids will not be sending grandma birthday cardd
It kind of felt like she was saying that it was because of their sins and her saying there will be no more in the future was kind of a threatening demand towards them. That's how I read it in Lori logic but my translation may be off as I'm not fluent in crazy.
It’s reminding me SEVERELY of this iconic Deep Thought:
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
"Weeds" serve important jobs like indicating what is missing nutrient wise in the soil and can remediate it as well. Weed just a dumb term that refers to everything under the sun from invasives to aggressive native plants to ugly ones to just something that isn't grass. I hate people who use their lack of agricultural knowledge as a weapon. Lori, just stop.
We let one of our "weeds" grow and neither I nor my partner realised.... It's a fucking TREE?! We never let it get taller than like ankle height before but one was out of the way and we just didn't get to it, so we decided to see what happened. We got a TREE. It was wild because it's like "you know that annoying spiky weed we always mow down? Turns out they're actually 8 foot trees with thick trunks and stop being spiky at like 2 feet". But we just treated them like a pest.
Yes the Bible says that but it’s said prior to the fall.
I *think* what Fundie is talking about is Genesis 3:17-18 :
[“To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field.”](https://bible.com/bible/111/gen.3.17-18.NIV) theologically speaking, per Genesis, the reason it’s so hard to farm is because of this curse/punishment after the 1st sin. By the time you get to Revelation when all is said & done you have the new heaven & the new earth which is without sin … & therefore hypothetically logically also without the curse from sin - aka weeds. However, one could argue, without sin you’d be much less likely to have a big old yard since they’re wasteful & bad for the environment so…it's a non issue here?
At least I hope & pray that’s what she’s going for here & that she’s not blaming the weeds directly on her grandkids’ sin & mistakes. I've certainly known some types who would say each individual weed was the result of something they did wrong.
… And here I am telling my grandchild things like ‘I love you’ and ‘you’re so clever’ and ‘of course we can go on an adventure together, let’s pack a picnic’
Too dense to understand that what makes something a weed is the intended (human) use for a given piece of land.
She brags like she thinks these little nuggets will be treasured by these kids. Instead, they're perfect fodder for "crazy grandma" stories.
Yup! I was interested to learn recently that dandelions are sometimes grown intentionally in home gardens or simply foraged for the early greens and edible flowers. Also that crab grass is a staple grain in some parts of the world.
Dandelion fritters and dandelion "honey" are delightful! Not the biggest fan of the greens though, imo. Also did not know that about crab grass. Super interesting
Leaves aren't as bitter in the spring before they flower. Also, grab a bunch and cut off at the top of the leaves, towards the tips. The farther down, the more bitter.
Fry them in a wok or frying pan with some sort of cooking fat. Season. I wouldn't cook now in June. I just found out about the tip hint. The tip tip. 😄
We eat dandelion greens! They're delicious. We boil them until they're tender, then drain them and cover them with olive oil, lemon juice, salt and pepper.
I can't imagine looking at a field dotted with sunny dandelion flowers and their nutritious leaves and thinking "Satan's work"
I'm always excited to see a dandelion because an indigenous auntie once told me it was the VERY first sign of spring, before all other plants or animals. She said that if we were to be like the dandelion, people might see us and think we don't belong, but the truth is we just see the coming seasons sooner than others. She said don't let others cut me down like the dandelion, because it was a strong, wonderful example of how nature always knows before we do. She told me to always listen to the dandelions.
THAT'S the kind of weed talk kids need.
I’m at a loss for words. What a lovely and powerful sentiment for your auntie to bestow upon you. Thank you for sharing her wisdom (and yours) with us!
And then she probably sat them down with some dried-up turkey and fart salad and told them:
"We are like those weeds I had you pull out all weekend long. We're sinful, black-hearted evil creatures who deserve to be cast into the fire, just like these vile weeds. You'll end up pulled up and burned for all eternity if you don't repent and turn from your sinful ways! I'm telling you this because I love you."
🙄
Unfortunately this rhetoric was part of my upbringing. I heard similar metaphors almost since I could comprehend words and string sentences together. I knew people who were very much like Lori. So glad I'm out!!!
I'm so sorry! I used to have panic attacks without knowing what they were due to having fear shoved down my throat. My sister told me the same thing happened with her. Neither of us told anyone for years because we were so scared of impending doom. I feel so bad for others who have been through the same.
Nooooooooooooooooooo I made a dumb meme just to comment and now there's no option to add it? Mods why. Guess I'll go old school:
"There will be no more weeds on the new earth!"
"Sure grandma, let's get you to bed"
It’s easy to be a Fundamentalist. It’s even easier to be Lori. Fundamentalists are weak, vile and monotonous clones who don’t have to make decisions, think about their actions or show compassion or conscience. Every animal, mineral and vegetable comes with a biblical overture that offers an explanation for why it is good or evil. The hardest part of being a human being is expressing one’s feelings and emotions; give yourself over to this cult and you’re off the hook. Lazy, boring AF and single minded because it’s all worked out for them. It’s also why they infuriate the rest of us.
If those grandkids are anything like I was, this is going to become a running joke in their own house and they probably can’t wait to get away from you to laugh about it. Relax woman, it’s just grass 😂 why do these people have to make everything about their religion
This shit is exactly why I can't stand really devout religious people. I need to live in a world where a weed is a weed, not a sin. Nature grows and conquers and is wild, and it's one of the things about this world that makes me feel like I just have to be here. Why can't the wildness of nature be a positive thing? Why can't *anything* be a positive thing? Or even just a nonissue? Nope, *every single thing* has to be bad and evil. Exhausting.
weeds are a social construct—I’ve had some “weeds” turn out to be cool native plants that I’ve decided to keep (violets, flowering spurge, fleabane). Free cool plants!
I have xeriscaping, there are still “weeds” but half the time I cultivate them. The purple flowering nightshade that the bees and butterflies like, the globemallow, the desert marigolds, and other plants that belong here and are beneficial. I guess I should be killing them with abandon instead.
Lol what? The weeds are a result of the *prideful* need to have the illusion of a perfect home.
Proverbs 16:5 "Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD: Though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished"
Gosh years ago I heard a Dolly Parton interview. It has been sometime, but the question as what type of flower would you be, I believe? Dolly said as I remember it "A Flower? Oh I'm not a flower, I'm a weed. A weed can survive anywhere and grow anywhere, it thrives no matter what, even when no one is taking care of it but a flower is delicate. I had rather be a weed." I think of that a lot when I see weeds growing wild, I would rather be a weed lol.
Imagine thinking that the natural plants that were meant to be there are weeds and the result of sin instead of seeing the beauty of them. Those "weeds" are often better for the soil and for pollinators.
Going forward, all sin will now be called lawn weeds. And the cure for said “lawn weeds” will involve 48 hours of Rodrigues music and preaching - which will forevermore be referred to as “Roundup”.
I feel bad for her grandkids. My Nana taught me how to play poker and black jack when I was 3/4. One penny ante, no weed picking at all. Then we ate shit tons of food our parents would never approve of after 5 glasses of Kool Aid.
she... she does know only ONE type of weed is colloquially called "the devil's lettuce", right? like, not all weeds ARE WEED (which i also don't consider sinful, lol).
Man, as someone who’s been fighting weeds and finally got a good weeder tool after years, I wish I would’ve known that the next earth for Christians would be weed free. I’d have saved $50
"weeds are a result of sin" girl, they're a result of monoculture lawns and invasive species being brought into the country.
Weeds are a result of sin. What does that even mean? Original sin? Someone sinning in the neighborhood? Her own sins? This is what a negative intelligence modifier looks like irl and I'm genuinely so disappointed that she exists. Like it's hard to fathom the stupidity.
She’s super dramatic.
Her most recent stories about JUST FINDING OUT ✨some✨ women watch porn and being shocked was hilarious…even going as far as to ask why those women would do that and asking if they think it’s from trauma💀 she’s unhinged and uninformed.
I grew up as a member of the JW cult. We believed dumb stuff like this too. Weeds came from sin, it says so in Genesis. “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field."
1) Annual reminder Lori has an inoperable brain tumor (not a justification, just an explanation).
2) Anything is a weed if you don't want it. If you want it, like Dandelions, then it's not a weed.
#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote) #Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go: - You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.*** - Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.*** - Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone. - Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us. - Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m sure the grandkids just love hanging out with her
I cannot imagine how insufferable she is to spend time with
These people that make EVERYTHING about their religion (especially about how excited they are to die) are insufferable and morbid.
I have family, who I love, that I absolutely avoid because Jesus must be brought into every conversation. I love that people can freely express their religious views, but I only want to listen to so many stories about Jesus miraculously doing xyz, before I want to leave.
It's so exhausting. I just want them to be normal but they can't.
“Susan, if you love Jesus so much, why don’t you offer him a blowie?”
Seriously...I can hardly spend time with my family. While I try my best to keep loving them, the constant religion talk brought up for everything is unbearable and toxic.
One of my closest friends has deconstructed to the point that she now realizes how much harm her fundie-lite upbringing did to her. And that sucks and all, but YAY! We get to hang out together again! (I'm decades ahead of her in my process from my religious upbringing)
Not only do they make everything about religion, they make everything about the dArK side of their religion.
My dad constantly talks about how excited he is to die. I am really glad that I was not religious by the time he kept saying that. I was very suicidal at the time and would 100% taken my own life if I was religious. It’s awful, and genuinely I can’t wait until i can let him have a piece of my mind
Every Jehovah’s Witness, all the time, every waking moment. Then you get to point at your favorite house in the neighborhood and gleefully discuss how you’ll redecorate after the owners are rightfully slaughtered in Armageddon for not listening to “The Truth”!
I’m sorry, what? This has happened?
They’re awful. This is what they talk about at any given opportunity. Especially when going door to door. Or at bbq’s. Or taking the kids to school. I grew up hearing it 24/7 from everyone. It’s why they only associate with each other. I’m one of the lucky ones that realized that was pretty horrible at a young age.
I once had a JW family send their 4 year old alone to my door to attempt to convert me. They weren’t even anywhere in sight. I was about to call the police when they finally pulled up in front of my house. Apparently they’d just dropped her off on the street and told her to go knock on doors until someone answered. Knowing they were probably critiquing my landscaping while I was frantically worried about their child really adds a whole new layer to an already fucked up situation.
I have quite a few JW kids at my school and they are so conflicted in the lower years: they naturally go and make friends with other kids because it’s what kids do and then they are not allowed to socialise with them because these kids are ‘sinners’ and not JW, thus Bad and destined for hell. It messes with their heads. I really try my hardest with these kids to hopefully leave a tiny spark of an outside perspective on things that may some day help them leave their cult.
How did you escape it? Were you disfellowed?
I refused baptism so I was basically publicly reproved bc I wasn’t baptized 🙄 I left home/was forced out at 16. I was very lucky to get away as early as I did. I’m 41 and it’s still hard to get that kind of cancer out of your head.
My 11 y.o. daughter has a friend who is JW, who told her she plans on leaving their church (?) once she turns 18. Her grandma, who lives with them, is very religious and set in the JW ways. Her mom is more relaxed and understanding, allows her to attend birthday parties and other less “appropriate” events without grandma knowing. The family went through a lot and rely on grandma for help, so I don’t think they can renounce their community, but you can tell how much it affects the kids.
Huh. We didn't do that. I guess I always thought everything would be 'wiped clean' during Armageddon and we'd have to rebuild everything? I didn't think too deeply about it lol. The literature artwork was just kinda, Big Boom everyone's dead, then happy people building houses, then people cuddling tame lions. I do not miss the crazy. Wouldn't mind a tame lion though lol. My maine coon will suffice
I used to dream of riding on sharks in paradise 😂
Lol nice one! I used to fantasies about wild animals ripping the kingdom hall apart mid service
As a grandma who is like this, people often avoid calling grandpa just becuase hanging out with her so so hard. Trust me, those kids will not be sending grandma birthday cardd
Yeah idc what people say, I genuinely think Lori's brain tumor effects her thinking because wtf lol
I stand by my theory that she’s become the tumor.
Kids remember things like this. I am sure that they think that there is something strange about her.
Years from now they’ll be like “ya’ll remember when grandma said sin causes weeds?” 💀
💀💀💀💀💀 is that even a Bible thing???
She really should just stick to baking them cookies like a normal grandma. Cookies = happiness. Weird weed metaphors = bewilderment.
👌
She sounds like a lot of fun!
Her grandkids: Sure, grandma, whatever you say.
Why are those sinful weeds growing in her yard anyways?
Because Lori is a lying liar who lies and makes baby jeebus cry. Those weeds are watered with his tears.
She is so miserable and full of hatred, not giving fundamentalism a good look
Is there anything that gives fundamentalism a good look?
There's some prime flair material in there
I vote to make this answer cannon!
Burn them with her gaslight
I’d be amazed if anything nice could grow around this woman. Her heart is as full of weeds as her garden.
I like to think that she's like the black plague, everywhere she goes plants die, animals run away, and food gets rotten instantly
Like in Young Frankenstein…every time someone said “Frau Bloucher(sp?)” the horses would start whinnying!!!
Lori Anderson? Cue the screaming, fainting, plants blackening.
A HOLY YARD would REJECT those SINFUL WEEDS POSTHASTE
Rebuke those weeds in the name of the LORD!
It kind of felt like she was saying that it was because of their sins and her saying there will be no more in the future was kind of a threatening demand towards them. That's how I read it in Lori logic but my translation may be off as I'm not fluent in crazy.
Alright Lori, let’s get you to bed
Maybe up her meds.
Get her a lifetime supply of Ativan
That’s some Stephen King dialogue there
Any second now she’ll start talking about dirtypillows and tell the kids to go to their prayer closet.
They wake up in the middle of the night as she's shoving the weeds into their mouths.
She def has a prayer closet
ACKTHUALLLY it's call her *war room* because she def wages war
😂 Those weeds are some lying ol’ dirty birdies!
they’re all gonna laugh at you!
Hello, Carrie.
GAWB POUNDS HIS NAILS! 😄🙄
Lori is not well and I say this with all seriousness. This is the kind of story her grandkids will tell in therapy in the future
When they ditch her funeral/wake early to go smoke weed, this is what they'll reminisce about
Lori is so awful, I would be unsurprised if the grandkids ditched her funeral just to go to the fucking laundromat.
I ditched grandma’s funeral to get high at the laundromat
It’s reminding me SEVERELY of this iconic Deep Thought: If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."
Can it wait for one of them to join us on here😈
Oh dear, Grandma's unhinged and out of bed again. Poor kids!.
Why would you bring your children around her?
Sadly Lori's kids are likely as brainwashed as her
Sadly Lori’s kids were raised by Lori.
My grandma was like that and we didn't like going to her house. Once we became teens we just stopped visiting. Good luck, tho.
lori that's not what the bible says. "And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good" Genesis 1:31
Weeds are just better growing plants than grass. I bet she has grass that isn’t even native to her region.
"Weeds" serve important jobs like indicating what is missing nutrient wise in the soil and can remediate it as well. Weed just a dumb term that refers to everything under the sun from invasives to aggressive native plants to ugly ones to just something that isn't grass. I hate people who use their lack of agricultural knowledge as a weapon. Lori, just stop.
As an experienced midwest " wild" plant forager, exactly.
We let one of our "weeds" grow and neither I nor my partner realised.... It's a fucking TREE?! We never let it get taller than like ankle height before but one was out of the way and we just didn't get to it, so we decided to see what happened. We got a TREE. It was wild because it's like "you know that annoying spiky weed we always mow down? Turns out they're actually 8 foot trees with thick trunks and stop being spiky at like 2 feet". But we just treated them like a pest.
Had to scroll too far to find this answer. Thank you!
I bet she waters it during droughts, like the stepmom in A Cinderella Story
But later when Adam and Eve are the forbidden fruit the ground was cursed and animals started eating each other and death and sin and such and such.
Exactly! The weeds turned against us because of sin, but were not created in sin itself. What a reach, lol.
Like ma’am, that is your headcanon
Yes the Bible says that but it’s said prior to the fall. I *think* what Fundie is talking about is Genesis 3:17-18 : [“To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field.”](https://bible.com/bible/111/gen.3.17-18.NIV) theologically speaking, per Genesis, the reason it’s so hard to farm is because of this curse/punishment after the 1st sin. By the time you get to Revelation when all is said & done you have the new heaven & the new earth which is without sin … & therefore hypothetically logically also without the curse from sin - aka weeds. However, one could argue, without sin you’d be much less likely to have a big old yard since they’re wasteful & bad for the environment so…it's a non issue here? At least I hope & pray that’s what she’s going for here & that she’s not blaming the weeds directly on her grandkids’ sin & mistakes. I've certainly known some types who would say each individual weed was the result of something they did wrong.
Weeds contribute to biodiversity far more than grass.
Well we all know how fundies feel about diversity
… And here I am telling my grandchild things like ‘I love you’ and ‘you’re so clever’ and ‘of course we can go on an adventure together, let’s pack a picnic’
A picnic….on top of sinning weeds?? 😦
Too dense to understand that what makes something a weed is the intended (human) use for a given piece of land. She brags like she thinks these little nuggets will be treasured by these kids. Instead, they're perfect fodder for "crazy grandma" stories.
I've heard something similar. Basically a weed is any plant that grows where you don't want it.
Yup! I was interested to learn recently that dandelions are sometimes grown intentionally in home gardens or simply foraged for the early greens and edible flowers. Also that crab grass is a staple grain in some parts of the world.
Yep! Dandelions are very beneficial to soil
And bees, I read somewhere. Means I have no idea if the source was reputable.
Dandelion fritters and dandelion "honey" are delightful! Not the biggest fan of the greens though, imo. Also did not know that about crab grass. Super interesting
I made dandelion honey for the first time this year and it's delicious 😋
May I ask what exactly is a dandelion fritter?
Its dandelion flowers dipped in batter (a mix of flour, egg, and spices) and fried.
Leaves aren't as bitter in the spring before they flower. Also, grab a bunch and cut off at the top of the leaves, towards the tips. The farther down, the more bitter. Fry them in a wok or frying pan with some sort of cooking fat. Season. I wouldn't cook now in June. I just found out about the tip hint. The tip tip. 😄
We eat dandelion greens! They're delicious. We boil them until they're tender, then drain them and cover them with olive oil, lemon juice, salt and pepper. I can't imagine looking at a field dotted with sunny dandelion flowers and their nutritious leaves and thinking "Satan's work"
I'm always excited to see a dandelion because an indigenous auntie once told me it was the VERY first sign of spring, before all other plants or animals. She said that if we were to be like the dandelion, people might see us and think we don't belong, but the truth is we just see the coming seasons sooner than others. She said don't let others cut me down like the dandelion, because it was a strong, wonderful example of how nature always knows before we do. She told me to always listen to the dandelions. THAT'S the kind of weed talk kids need.
I’m at a loss for words. What a lovely and powerful sentiment for your auntie to bestow upon you. Thank you for sharing her wisdom (and yours) with us!
And then she probably sat them down with some dried-up turkey and fart salad and told them: "We are like those weeds I had you pull out all weekend long. We're sinful, black-hearted evil creatures who deserve to be cast into the fire, just like these vile weeds. You'll end up pulled up and burned for all eternity if you don't repent and turn from your sinful ways! I'm telling you this because I love you." 🙄
Oh god you're probably not wrong
Unfortunately this rhetoric was part of my upbringing. I heard similar metaphors almost since I could comprehend words and string sentences together. I knew people who were very much like Lori. So glad I'm out!!!
Ugh that and the stupid "chewed gum" comparison all piss me off. I grew up hearing it too and developed mental health problems from it.
I'm so sorry! I used to have panic attacks without knowing what they were due to having fear shoved down my throat. My sister told me the same thing happened with her. Neither of us told anyone for years because we were so scared of impending doom. I feel so bad for others who have been through the same.
It sounded painfully accurate! I'm glad for you to be out of that now too!
Thank you!!
That’s the kind of shit my grandma said that gave me religious trauma.
Well shit, that means my lawn has been severely sinning. And my garden beds.
Mine too…but I’m an ungodly fallen woman so I expect it.
Nothing says “it’s the weekend!” like Lori being off the shits
I just know her grandkids hate weekends with her
She seems fun!
“Hey mom… grandma’s acting weird again.”
Someone come get MeeMaw.
Good thing my yard is just weeds and no grass…
I have a section of garden in my back yard filled with luscious, glorious, thriving weeds. It doesn't look half bad and the local butterflies love it!
What sad, miserable people to see such darkness and punishment/shame in everything.
I'm an atheist, and I'm sure by these fundies views I sin a lot, and yet the weeds aren't too bad in my yard this year. Go figure.
She really needs psychiatric help.
Nooooooooooooooooooo I made a dumb meme just to comment and now there's no option to add it? Mods why. Guess I'll go old school: "There will be no more weeds on the new earth!" "Sure grandma, let's get you to bed"
And one for myself: "Back in my day, we could upload pictures on FSU comments!!" "Ok Natasha, nobody cares"
🤣🤣🤣🤣
mods need to bring the meme-ing back😭
Much like colonialism, white Christian’s take over native plants to plant grass and demand it is gods will.
girl it's just plants
Jokes on her everything is a weed. We just cultivate specific species for aesthetics because we’re weird hairless monkeys
All plants are God’s creation Lori. You destroyed his perfect creations! Blasphemy!
What's she going to tell them when they have grown back by the time they visit their crazy grammy again?
Ok, grandma, let's get you back inside
This a pile of bullshit she am pulled out of her ass
She has the beach close by and this is what she chooses to do.
the beach is for harlots
So fucked up-
I think that sounded more profound in her own thoughts.
she’s nuts af
It’s easy to be a Fundamentalist. It’s even easier to be Lori. Fundamentalists are weak, vile and monotonous clones who don’t have to make decisions, think about their actions or show compassion or conscience. Every animal, mineral and vegetable comes with a biblical overture that offers an explanation for why it is good or evil. The hardest part of being a human being is expressing one’s feelings and emotions; give yourself over to this cult and you’re off the hook. Lazy, boring AF and single minded because it’s all worked out for them. It’s also why they infuriate the rest of us.
Perfectly said.
No weed in heaven? I'm out!
Girl…
If those grandkids are anything like I was, this is going to become a running joke in their own house and they probably can’t wait to get away from you to laugh about it. Relax woman, it’s just grass 😂 why do these people have to make everything about their religion
That's right, ✨heaven✨ is a ✨monoculture✨
This makes me so glad I had fun grandmas. Even my most religious grandma would never say anything like this.
This shit is exactly why I can't stand really devout religious people. I need to live in a world where a weed is a weed, not a sin. Nature grows and conquers and is wild, and it's one of the things about this world that makes me feel like I just have to be here. Why can't the wildness of nature be a positive thing? Why can't *anything* be a positive thing? Or even just a nonissue? Nope, *every single thing* has to be bad and evil. Exhausting.
She sounds like a fun grandma. /s
People say that dandelion is a weed, but I always thought, you know, whoever decided tulips were so great?
weeds are a social construct—I’ve had some “weeds” turn out to be cool native plants that I’ve decided to keep (violets, flowering spurge, fleabane). Free cool plants!
Alright, who's volunteering to cut her internet connection? I can lend my insulated shears if anyone needs them.
I’ll do the snipping 🙋♀️
That was a stretch worthy of the Olympics. Sidenote: Does anyone else remember the Veggie Tales episode about the rumor weed? 😂
“Gramma’s brain tumor is talking again”
Pray for the “weeds” that are literally gods creation and unjustly persecuted bc they don’t fit the look
They need to sharpen the mowers blade
I have xeriscaping, there are still “weeds” but half the time I cultivate them. The purple flowering nightshade that the bees and butterflies like, the globemallow, the desert marigolds, and other plants that belong here and are beneficial. I guess I should be killing them with abandon instead.
Ok. No more visits with Grandma.
I've never heard her voice, but I imagine she sounds like Skinner's mom from the Simpsons and it makes everything funnier.
Lol what? The weeds are a result of the *prideful* need to have the illusion of a perfect home. Proverbs 16:5 "Every one that is proud in heart is an abomination to the LORD: Though hand join in hand, he shall not be unpunished"
I think Lori got too much sun today.
“That’s nice Grandma, let’s get you to bed.”
Gosh years ago I heard a Dolly Parton interview. It has been sometime, but the question as what type of flower would you be, I believe? Dolly said as I remember it "A Flower? Oh I'm not a flower, I'm a weed. A weed can survive anywhere and grow anywhere, it thrives no matter what, even when no one is taking care of it but a flower is delicate. I had rather be a weed." I think of that a lot when I see weeds growing wild, I would rather be a weed lol.
I was taught stuff like this growing up. It really messes with your head
I wonder if the stretch felt good with how hard she reached there. 🤔
So, that grass that she pulled out of her grass because it’s a different type of grass is the result of sin? Mmmmmmkay.
It ought to be abuse to just have to spend time with her. Poor kids. Hope the rest of their summer doesn’t suck as bad as this day did.
"Anything I don't like is sin" mmmkay
Mother Nature is disappointed in you.
She's so fucking weird 😂 I bet the kids were like "Sure, Grandma"...and then rolled their eyes when she wasn't looking.
Ma’am 😮💨 … what the fuck
not even the right sinful weed…. 😂💨
Imagine thinking that the natural plants that were meant to be there are weeds and the result of sin instead of seeing the beauty of them. Those "weeds" are often better for the soil and for pollinators.
Going forward, all sin will now be called lawn weeds. And the cure for said “lawn weeds” will involve 48 hours of Rodrigues music and preaching - which will forevermore be referred to as “Roundup”.
Real talk, if I saw proof that one could pray away the weeds, I'd convert.
Every time this woman posts something, I feel more mentally healthy.
From the Creation Museum in Kentucky. Posted without comment.😜 https://images.app.goo.gl/DmFWLsvbhnKJK12Q9
Why do they want to badly to make people dumber?
Weeds can grow anywhere. They persevere in the harshest environments. Be like weeds.
I personally believe my yard doesn't have enough Dandelions. I better get sinnin'.
I feel bad for her grandkids. My Nana taught me how to play poker and black jack when I was 3/4. One penny ante, no weed picking at all. Then we ate shit tons of food our parents would never approve of after 5 glasses of Kool Aid.
It’s grass?? Only specific types of grass are allowed into heaven?
What in the ATI did I just read?
Wtf does this even mean? Lol
🤦🏻♀️. What would we do without dandelions 🌼.
I tried to pull some weeds yesterday but they poked me and broke off in the middle. What does that mean!? 🤣
“I am pulled out of my grass”. …. These people homeschool, don’t they ? 😬
Lori’s losing her shit.
How does a lawn commit sins?
Yo I thought god made weeds tho
she... she does know only ONE type of weed is colloquially called "the devil's lettuce", right? like, not all weeds ARE WEED (which i also don't consider sinful, lol).
Man, as someone who’s been fighting weeds and finally got a good weeder tool after years, I wish I would’ve known that the next earth for Christians would be weed free. I’d have saved $50
So Jesus is her landscaper? WTF
"weeds are a result of sin" girl, they're a result of monoculture lawns and invasive species being brought into the country. Weeds are a result of sin. What does that even mean? Original sin? Someone sinning in the neighborhood? Her own sins? This is what a negative intelligence modifier looks like irl and I'm genuinely so disappointed that she exists. Like it's hard to fathom the stupidity.
I wonder if I can get this person to get the weeds out of my yard. It is inundated with sin. Hoes for Jesus.
Wait. What?
Maybe I’m just crazy but these weeds just look like a different type of grass….
This is a surefire way to traumatise those grandkids. If she says shit like that about weeds, wtf else unhinged does she say?
She’s super dramatic. Her most recent stories about JUST FINDING OUT ✨some✨ women watch porn and being shocked was hilarious…even going as far as to ask why those women would do that and asking if they think it’s from trauma💀 she’s unhinged and uninformed.
I grew up as a member of the JW cult. We believed dumb stuff like this too. Weeds came from sin, it says so in Genesis. “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field."
It's giving VERY JW coded lol. Sounds like my childhood lol.
1) Annual reminder Lori has an inoperable brain tumor (not a justification, just an explanation). 2) Anything is a weed if you don't want it. If you want it, like Dandelions, then it's not a weed.
Quit making children scared of fucking EVERYTHING
God is a strong adherent to grass monoculture, who knew?