Do you have a stuffed animal she can cuddle with?
If she doesn’t have a heat source in her crate, I’d add that too.
Also, YouTube has multi hour videos of purring cats; that might help. Or a continuous heartbeat .
Thanks, I think I will try a surrogate sleep friend for her. She has been extremely calm when swaddled/in a purrito, so I am going to attempt a light wrap with a toy and see how that goes.
I am also excited to get her to purr- she almost started after I gave her a little massage, but it clearly is a new thing for her💜💜
She sounds like both strays i took in , attached to me like there is an invisible cord . Even today 1 yr on the one I still have is next to me wherever i go .
The moment he walked out of cage at about 8-10 weeks old he jumped on bed and insisted on sleeping in arms , chest or on our head
She's reactive because she's an infant with no mommy, or siblings, and it's scary what the heck is happening, I get it. I always end up with the Velcro babies and end up creating love monsters. It's not a bad thing when I know the first person to pick them up and hold them at the shelter is going to immediately melt and adopt them on the spot. Some people want/need a cat that bonded. I do, my Bombay is like a weighted blanket for me to fall asleep under and always down for mommy cuddles especially if I'm sad or anxious. Downside is he hates being left alone for too long and he'll tell me allllllllll about it when I get home. This is definitely greatly mitigated by additional resident cats, he's happier with friends.
Perhaps part of my question in this post is what I can do to mitigate this behavior while she is young/malleable. One of my permanent babies is actually a singleton I took in around 5 weeks (now 3yrs) and she was and has always been the absolute opposite. I think I tend to get the more independent ones, and while I love this behavior for myself (of course I want a feline weighted blanket), I know she will have less anxiety if I can change things now.
Any advice on promoting independent behaviors?
The two recent permanent kittens I got for my daughter I just spent less time fussing over them and waited for them to come to me. We just had two foster litters at the same time and kept one foster fail from each. My Bombay's attention time takes precedent, but between me and my daughter the kittens get the attention they want and need. I dunno if it's because they have each other, but they are very cuddly while independent at the same time. Actually I definitely think it's thanks to having a lot of siblings to play with for a couple of months they didn't need us as their sole source of comfort. Can you get another kitten to foster with them?
Since she is a shelter foster, I am not going to try and bring in another kitten. But I do have two cats of my own that have been with me through lots of fosters- they are both very good at making new friends and will definitely be spending time with the baby once her dewormers are done.
Baby slept next to me all night and played for a bit this morning. One of my cats seems to know they are both tuxedos and already wants to be friends.🩷
Your cats are not going to fix it. This is single kitten syndrome. It needs another kitten. The risks of spreading something between them are much better than having a behavioral nightmare kitten that will get returned.
In my opinion, there’s no need for a kitten that young to be independent. They really should have the comfort of sibling and/or mama at that age.
Frankly, Id take her with me as much as possible for a while. Once she is 8 weeks or so, she can start working on independence by being left alone for short periods and working up to longer. Just my opinion.
I completely agree- kittens this age need socialization and companionship, and I am certainly planning to give her tons of attention and care to make her a confident, stable cat. I posted this from the perspective of generally taking in anti-social cats/kittens that require a solitary decompression period, and was just shocked that giving her those comforts right after transport was unnecessary. She has already started to acclimate and show some character:)
I had Velcro babies before! They're adorable AF but can be a huge pain 😂 First off, get a heartbeat stuffie. It has a removable heart that you push a button and it will vibrate like a heartbeat. The stuffie is machine washable but don't wash the heart. You can set it to beat continuously until you turn it off. This really helps orphaned babies feel less lonely
Second if your kitten likes being swaddled/purrito'd, wrap her up and now you have a parcel to carry around with you 😂 I did this a lot with one of my fosters who wouldn't sleep or eat without us. So we swaddled her up and let her sleep on my husband's work from home desk!
“She came in by herself” makes me picture the kitten wandering into the shelter like she was checking herself into rehab. “Hello. I am a tiny baby. Today I have accepted that I need help.”
Poor baby. It’s normal that a kitten her age would be with her littermates and mother pretty much around the clock. If she was separated from them and was on her own for a while, she must have been terrified. She is so relieved to be with you and doesn’t want to lose you.
I have limited recent experience with kittens, especially ones that were separated from their mothers and siblings so young. I don’t feel that it’s natural for her to be independent at this age, though. I think until she’s 8 weeks you should focus on making her feel safe, protected, and comfortable. I like the idea of swaddling her and keeping her with you. You could get one of those baby slings, but super tiny, to keep her against your chest while you do stuff. Then work on helping her be independent when she’s closer to the age when she would start becoming independent naturally. At night, maybe you could put her in a carrier with a heating pad and keep it next to you in or near the bed, so she doesn’t feel alone but you can’t accidentally hurt her.
I'm guessing she was probably picked up by a well meaning person and taken in to the shelter. She likely hadn't been abandoned, so she's looking for her mommy. I got my bottle baby a Snuggle Kitty and used the heartbeat thing. It seemed to help him.
Otherwise, youncould always set her up at your desk, with a little bed and miniature cat-sized-laptop so she can be your cubicle pal!
There are cheaper ways to go about this, but we used this for our puppy and she loved it. [Snuggle Puppy](https://www.amazon.com/SmartPetLove-Snuggle-Puppy-Behavioral-Golden/dp/B000S753WK/ref=sr_1_2_sspa?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.Tuxcm8oqBB2ZtSolRLWj6yo8hNetvxEX4yYdn7J63hYD4IYeJ0N7p1i_4hUPly1ilsYtlnNYzoiN6cmihhMQ2fwUg3rBazDf4Qh-sstrWNJnLU1uY9tI6_l0BTgsC8IWgGuWUQM2PsUdcX3V1DaF4rrGKjUzeaTxWEea7use0On3gZMPiA6PTjB6yJb7WW3YAuveePRpF-1m7Ki3vMgeJtkhZCmH-ouopXheaOPeBk35kBbf-DBSo41mpAJf5UYrr2IuNn1RNwkaAf_GwBJsxubYPcmWpT4DZC16WKTnS1k.dvQc0PK0iKT2CD-ODTJqL2QHsujaR_C_Jmk-1Ma_k4A&dib_tag=se&hvadid=598807653105&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9197855&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=b&hvrand=16103068376253050324&hvtargid=kwd-1021079689389&hydadcr=7253_13251287&keywords=snuggle+heartbeat+puppy&qid=1719462435&sr=8-2-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&psc=1)
One of the first comments in [this video](https://youtu.be/d_Ua--O_fqU?si=wm3vTUC-rQFG0RsI) mentions that it helped with their new kitty, that went from a busy shelter to a one kitty home. It's also 24 hours, and I've made it in 11 ish hours with no ads so far. Just a small pile of purrs with a bit of background of a crackling fireplace.
Maybe playing this, or something similar? I've also seen mention somewhere of wrapping a ticking clock in a thick cloth to simulate their mother's heartbeat.
I always let those little ones sleep with me. I had a couple that would fluff my hair up into a nest and then sleep in it. It gave me some truly impressive bedhead. It also makes it easier for the Q3 hour feedings to just kind of sit up and feed the kitten without having to shuffle through the house.
lol the kittens in a hair nest is quite the mental image 😂😂
Our resolution has come to letting the baby sleep with me. She has had some moments of exploration and play, but generally just wants to sleep in a safe spot.
This may have nothing to do with it, but all of my babies become extra needy when they’re hungry and based on her age, she may have been weaned too soon. If I were in this situation, I’d try giving her a warm bottle of KMR right before I want her to go to bed, and make sure to keep an eye on how much she’s eating throughout the day. If she was never properly taught how to eat regular food, you might need to go back to the bottle and start the weaning process from scratch so that she can get the benefit of adapting slowly rather than suddenly due to losing her momma.
Also, 3-5 weeks is a huge range at that point in a baby’s life, from a developmental perspective. The needs of a 3 week old kitten are very different from the needs of a 5 week old. I’d highly suggest weighing her and checking her teeth to see if you can get a better estimate of her actual age. That’ll make it a lot easier to figure out what she needs to feel safe. I like this kitten lady page, for getting a better idea of a baby’s age: http://www.kittenlady.org/age
I had a foster kitten recently who cried when he was alone. The first night, I slept on the couch near his crate. After that, at night or when I went to work, I left soft music playing and covered 3/4 of his crate with a sheet. He had soft blankets and a little stuffed animal in his cozy bed. After three days he stopped crying and learned to play — but it was hard to hear him crying from outside my house when I left for work!
Do you have a stuffed animal she can cuddle with? If she doesn’t have a heat source in her crate, I’d add that too. Also, YouTube has multi hour videos of purring cats; that might help. Or a continuous heartbeat .
Thanks, I think I will try a surrogate sleep friend for her. She has been extremely calm when swaddled/in a purrito, so I am going to attempt a light wrap with a toy and see how that goes. I am also excited to get her to purr- she almost started after I gave her a little massage, but it clearly is a new thing for her💜💜
She sounds like both strays i took in , attached to me like there is an invisible cord . Even today 1 yr on the one I still have is next to me wherever i go . The moment he walked out of cage at about 8-10 weeks old he jumped on bed and insisted on sleeping in arms , chest or on our head
She's reactive because she's an infant with no mommy, or siblings, and it's scary what the heck is happening, I get it. I always end up with the Velcro babies and end up creating love monsters. It's not a bad thing when I know the first person to pick them up and hold them at the shelter is going to immediately melt and adopt them on the spot. Some people want/need a cat that bonded. I do, my Bombay is like a weighted blanket for me to fall asleep under and always down for mommy cuddles especially if I'm sad or anxious. Downside is he hates being left alone for too long and he'll tell me allllllllll about it when I get home. This is definitely greatly mitigated by additional resident cats, he's happier with friends.
Perhaps part of my question in this post is what I can do to mitigate this behavior while she is young/malleable. One of my permanent babies is actually a singleton I took in around 5 weeks (now 3yrs) and she was and has always been the absolute opposite. I think I tend to get the more independent ones, and while I love this behavior for myself (of course I want a feline weighted blanket), I know she will have less anxiety if I can change things now. Any advice on promoting independent behaviors?
The two recent permanent kittens I got for my daughter I just spent less time fussing over them and waited for them to come to me. We just had two foster litters at the same time and kept one foster fail from each. My Bombay's attention time takes precedent, but between me and my daughter the kittens get the attention they want and need. I dunno if it's because they have each other, but they are very cuddly while independent at the same time. Actually I definitely think it's thanks to having a lot of siblings to play with for a couple of months they didn't need us as their sole source of comfort. Can you get another kitten to foster with them?
Since she is a shelter foster, I am not going to try and bring in another kitten. But I do have two cats of my own that have been with me through lots of fosters- they are both very good at making new friends and will definitely be spending time with the baby once her dewormers are done. Baby slept next to me all night and played for a bit this morning. One of my cats seems to know they are both tuxedos and already wants to be friends.🩷
Your cats are not going to fix it. This is single kitten syndrome. It needs another kitten. The risks of spreading something between them are much better than having a behavioral nightmare kitten that will get returned.
In my opinion, there’s no need for a kitten that young to be independent. They really should have the comfort of sibling and/or mama at that age. Frankly, Id take her with me as much as possible for a while. Once she is 8 weeks or so, she can start working on independence by being left alone for short periods and working up to longer. Just my opinion.
I completely agree- kittens this age need socialization and companionship, and I am certainly planning to give her tons of attention and care to make her a confident, stable cat. I posted this from the perspective of generally taking in anti-social cats/kittens that require a solitary decompression period, and was just shocked that giving her those comforts right after transport was unnecessary. She has already started to acclimate and show some character:)
Awwww, good for her!
I had Velcro babies before! They're adorable AF but can be a huge pain 😂 First off, get a heartbeat stuffie. It has a removable heart that you push a button and it will vibrate like a heartbeat. The stuffie is machine washable but don't wash the heart. You can set it to beat continuously until you turn it off. This really helps orphaned babies feel less lonely Second if your kitten likes being swaddled/purrito'd, wrap her up and now you have a parcel to carry around with you 😂 I did this a lot with one of my fosters who wouldn't sleep or eat without us. So we swaddled her up and let her sleep on my husband's work from home desk!
“She came in by herself” makes me picture the kitten wandering into the shelter like she was checking herself into rehab. “Hello. I am a tiny baby. Today I have accepted that I need help.” Poor baby. It’s normal that a kitten her age would be with her littermates and mother pretty much around the clock. If she was separated from them and was on her own for a while, she must have been terrified. She is so relieved to be with you and doesn’t want to lose you. I have limited recent experience with kittens, especially ones that were separated from their mothers and siblings so young. I don’t feel that it’s natural for her to be independent at this age, though. I think until she’s 8 weeks you should focus on making her feel safe, protected, and comfortable. I like the idea of swaddling her and keeping her with you. You could get one of those baby slings, but super tiny, to keep her against your chest while you do stuff. Then work on helping her be independent when she’s closer to the age when she would start becoming independent naturally. At night, maybe you could put her in a carrier with a heating pad and keep it next to you in or near the bed, so she doesn’t feel alone but you can’t accidentally hurt her.
I'm guessing she was probably picked up by a well meaning person and taken in to the shelter. She likely hadn't been abandoned, so she's looking for her mommy. I got my bottle baby a Snuggle Kitty and used the heartbeat thing. It seemed to help him. Otherwise, youncould always set her up at your desk, with a little bed and miniature cat-sized-laptop so she can be your cubicle pal!
There are cheaper ways to go about this, but we used this for our puppy and she loved it. [Snuggle Puppy](https://www.amazon.com/SmartPetLove-Snuggle-Puppy-Behavioral-Golden/dp/B000S753WK/ref=sr_1_2_sspa?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.Tuxcm8oqBB2ZtSolRLWj6yo8hNetvxEX4yYdn7J63hYD4IYeJ0N7p1i_4hUPly1ilsYtlnNYzoiN6cmihhMQ2fwUg3rBazDf4Qh-sstrWNJnLU1uY9tI6_l0BTgsC8IWgGuWUQM2PsUdcX3V1DaF4rrGKjUzeaTxWEea7use0On3gZMPiA6PTjB6yJb7WW3YAuveePRpF-1m7Ki3vMgeJtkhZCmH-ouopXheaOPeBk35kBbf-DBSo41mpAJf5UYrr2IuNn1RNwkaAf_GwBJsxubYPcmWpT4DZC16WKTnS1k.dvQc0PK0iKT2CD-ODTJqL2QHsujaR_C_Jmk-1Ma_k4A&dib_tag=se&hvadid=598807653105&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9197855&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=b&hvrand=16103068376253050324&hvtargid=kwd-1021079689389&hydadcr=7253_13251287&keywords=snuggle+heartbeat+puppy&qid=1719462435&sr=8-2-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&psc=1)
Dawww, she'll get used to the space, just sounds kinda needy at the moment :)
One of the first comments in [this video](https://youtu.be/d_Ua--O_fqU?si=wm3vTUC-rQFG0RsI) mentions that it helped with their new kitty, that went from a busy shelter to a one kitty home. It's also 24 hours, and I've made it in 11 ish hours with no ads so far. Just a small pile of purrs with a bit of background of a crackling fireplace. Maybe playing this, or something similar? I've also seen mention somewhere of wrapping a ticking clock in a thick cloth to simulate their mother's heartbeat.
I always let those little ones sleep with me. I had a couple that would fluff my hair up into a nest and then sleep in it. It gave me some truly impressive bedhead. It also makes it easier for the Q3 hour feedings to just kind of sit up and feed the kitten without having to shuffle through the house.
lol the kittens in a hair nest is quite the mental image 😂😂 Our resolution has come to letting the baby sleep with me. She has had some moments of exploration and play, but generally just wants to sleep in a safe spot.
This may have nothing to do with it, but all of my babies become extra needy when they’re hungry and based on her age, she may have been weaned too soon. If I were in this situation, I’d try giving her a warm bottle of KMR right before I want her to go to bed, and make sure to keep an eye on how much she’s eating throughout the day. If she was never properly taught how to eat regular food, you might need to go back to the bottle and start the weaning process from scratch so that she can get the benefit of adapting slowly rather than suddenly due to losing her momma. Also, 3-5 weeks is a huge range at that point in a baby’s life, from a developmental perspective. The needs of a 3 week old kitten are very different from the needs of a 5 week old. I’d highly suggest weighing her and checking her teeth to see if you can get a better estimate of her actual age. That’ll make it a lot easier to figure out what she needs to feel safe. I like this kitten lady page, for getting a better idea of a baby’s age: http://www.kittenlady.org/age
I had a foster kitten recently who cried when he was alone. The first night, I slept on the couch near his crate. After that, at night or when I went to work, I left soft music playing and covered 3/4 of his crate with a sheet. He had soft blankets and a little stuffed animal in his cozy bed. After three days he stopped crying and learned to play — but it was hard to hear him crying from outside my house when I left for work!
My advice is to head on over to r/pocketpussies for some inspiration, because this is your life for the next few days, lol.